#### AUTHORS NOTE – The intro to this post has been changed many times based on feedback that it did not hit hard enough to reach you, modern people, with your constant need for layer upon layer of explanation, as you need that fake feeling of cleverness it evokes in you TO SPUR YOU ON because YOU ARE A CHILD. So YOU HAVE THE MINDSET OF A CHILD BECAUSE YOU HAVE NEVER CHANGED IT, grown out of it, SO YOU ARE DOMINATED BY YOUR INFERIORITY COMPLEX, YOU LITERALLY LIVE IN FEAR, ANXIETY, using the biological RELIEFS of an animal to COMFORT YOURSELF, whilst thinking they are DESIRES, PLEASURES. They are not, they are ‘momentary pressures that you relieve’, like hunger for food, NOT DESIRES, yet you dress them up AND MAKE A WHOLE LIFE OUT OF THEM…
However, even I accept that as my last general post, designed to ‘help the unhelpable’ amongst you – A CHILD CANNOT THINK THEIR WAY OUT OF BEING A CHILD WITH OUT HELP – it is appropriate to ‘try the last’, and throw down some of my best, MOST PRACTICAL WORK, and wish you well with it. Just be aware – this POST IS FOR FOLKS ‘WHO WANT TO WIN’, BECAUSE THEY WANT TO ‘STOP LOSING’… See, for many of you the process of GROWING UP is a process of RECOVERY – TO GETBACK WHAT YOU HAD AS A KID, so YOU MUST ‘STOP COMFORTING YOURSELF’ LIKE A BITCH – WINNING IS ON THE OTHER SIDE OF COMFORT, COMFORT IS A MENTAL TRIX TO MAKE SLAVERY MORE BEARABLE FOR A MOMENT, AND TRIXS ARE FOR KIDS…
Just note that this is NOT WHAT I DO, IT IS NOT TEACHING DEVELOPMENT TO GIFTED, SPIRITED PEOPLE , IT IS SIMPLY CATCHING YOU UP TO WHAT YOU SHOULD BE TO ‘START WITH’, SO YOU CAN GET PASSED YOUR OWN BULLSHIT. I don’t teach animals to be GIFTED, I DON’T TEACH KUNDALINI in all its many forms, and I don’t teach animals to comfort themselves with Religion, Spiritualities 2nd prize. So this post will not be changed again, I have little interest in it, so if this level of detail does not reach you with the urgent need to recreate yourself in order to escape the banal tedium of your childish existence then there is nothing further I will do – we have reached the limit, anything further is pointless, a level of basic that means you are simply too stupid to change, AT LEAST BEFORE YOU GET SICK, BROKEN AND DESPERATE.
Please take this last comment as I intend it – an insult – you are wasting my time, content to hide in the shadows with your need for secrets like a big kid, even though you know your secret life is not even secret, with so little respect for yourself that you are NEVER GOING TO HAVE ENOUGH of the ‘RESPECT FOR ME’, FOR THIS GUIDANCE, that ‘you the child’ needs in order TO DO-ANY-BLOODY-THING DIFERENT, do you, dumb ass. YOU ONLY DO WHAT YOUR ‘CHOSEN AUTHORITY’ TELLS YOU, as a child, BECAUSE YOU NEED TO BE TOLD WHAT TO DO IN ORDER ‘TO DO ANYTHING’ – YOUR NEED FOR A MASTER IS LITERALLY PART OF THE DNA OF A CHILD, SO THE CONSTANT NEED TO BE TOLD IS FORCED ON YOU UNLESS YOU GROW UP – A CHILD IS A ‘WILLING SLAVE’, AS IT COMFORTS IT.
Most of your current problems as a BIG KID come down to bad choices in the area of YOUR CHOSEN AUTHORITY, AND THE BLIND STUPIDITY WITH WHICH YOU HAVE TO FOLLOW IT IN ORDER TO COMFORT YOURSELF THAT SOMEONE HAS YOUR BACK – to make substantial life changing decisions as simple, CHILDISH need TO CLEVE to what you think is POWERFUL/GOOD TO PROTECT YOU, without a thought of its intention for you, YOUR UTILITY. This means you will be USED BADLY, as everyone THINKS YOU ARE DUMB AS FUCK, easily led, easily controlled, and easily fucked over for the fun of animals. This is particuarly bad for you when you reject the ‘correct authority’ IN FAVOUR TO A MUCH WEAKER ONE BECAUSE IT IS SIMPLY MORE PERSISTENT, AS THE COMFORT GENERATED BY LITTLE BUT OFTEN FELT POWER wears you the child down very quickly, SO YOU MAKE CONTINUAL, HORRIFIC MISTAKES IN WHO YOU TRUST.
So choose wisely little people – I USE my ‘AUTHORITY’, my POWER AS A TEST WHICH YOU NEED TO SEE THE TRUTH IN THIS, HENCE ITS AUTHORITY OVER YOU, before you are worth the rest of it, TO SEE IF YOU CAN SEE YOURSELF YET, so USE THIS CHANCE TO SEE YOURSELF ‘NOW’, RIGHT-FUCKING-NOW, SEE THE OBVIOUS, PETTY TRIVIALITY OF YOUR NO-CHARACTER ‘NOW’, as then you won’t be so shocked when it is forced on you as you die. See ‘YOU THE CHILD’ as A MENTAL STATE, AS ‘A TRAIN OF THOUGHT’, ALWAYS DIES FIRST, BEFORE YOU ‘LOSE CONSCIOUSNESS’, because it is USELESS SET OF SCAFFOLDING, that once protected you THE CHILD, long, long ago BUT IS NOW RUSTED THROUGH. Now that CREEKY OLD FRAMEWORK does nothing but stick into soul like a rusty set of spikes on the GATE of a narrow little gateway to yourself, and so repels you, COVERS YOU UP, HIDES YOU, STOPS YOU BEING YOURSELF, forever.
CHOOSE WISELY, THE AUTHORITY YOU PLACE OVER YOURSELF IS ‘YOUR DESTINY’ and you destiny is happening NOW – THE CORRECT AUTHORITY IS WHAT ‘MAKES YOU STRONGER PERSONALLY’, NOT BY ASSOCIATION WITH OTHERS WHO YOU THINK PROTECT YOU, WHICH MAKES YOU WEAKER, MORE DEPENDENT, EVEN MORE OF A CHILD, OBVIOUSLY. Above all else you must GET STRONGER – STRONG ENOUGH TO GO SLIGHTLY MAD WITH A SMILE, STRONG ENOUGH TO GET BIGGER CONSCIOUSLY IN ORDER TO SEE YOUR DEMONS, STRONG TO FEED THOSE SAME DEMONS WHILST CONTROLLING THEM.
MOST OF ALL YOU MUST GET STRONG ENOUGH TO REALIZE YOU LIVE IN A PERSONAL FANTASY WORLD SO WHAT THE FUCK DOES WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK OF YOU MATTER, AS YOU ARE CREATING THAT OPINION IN YOURSELF, THEY DON’T HAVE AN OPINION, THE ARE ANIMALS – IT IS YOUR OPINION OF THEIR OPINION, ANOTHER FANTASY, SO CHANGE IT, OR BE FREE OF IT, IT IS A CHILDS REALITY. YOU CAN BE WHOEVER YOU WISH AS A CHARACTER BECAUSE YOU HAVE NO BLOODY CHARACTER AS A CHILD – CHOOSE ONE, PLAY A NEW, BETTER ROLE AND RE-INVENT YOURSELF BY REALIZING YOU HAVE NO CHARACTER, YOU ARE A VOID, A VACUM, SIMPLY COVERED UP BY THE REACTIVE, MECHANICAL PATTERNS OF A CHILD… A LITTLE FUCKIN KID…
In the immortal words of Robert Louis Stevenson – “You cannot run away from a weakness, you must sometimes fight it out or perish. And if that be so, why not now and where you stand?” So be lucky, as for most of you the LUCK OF YOUR GIFT is the TINY TWIST OF FATE that will make the difference between STRENGTH AND WEAKNESS in the MOMENT OF YOUR NEED FOR THEM, and that is all this post is really about – I AM TRYING TO MAKE YOU LUCKIER BY FORCING BETTER PATTERNS AS TRUTH INTO YOUR THICK HEAD. YOU ARE ‘NO-THING’, HARMLESS, POWERLESS, USELESS, FECKLESS, A POINTLESS COMFORT SEEKING WHORE – YOU ARE FAKE, every single thing you think of yourself is fake = YOU HAVE NOTHING TO LOSE, NOBODY CARES WHAT YOU THINK TO YOURSELF.
SO DO YOURSELF A BIG FAVOUR, NOW – REALIZE ‘YOU ARE A CHILD’, SO EVERYTHING ABOUT YOUR MIND IS PART OF THE BIOLOGICAL PROCESSES OF A CHILD – IT IS A MINDSET. THE BIGGEST AND MOST URGENT OF ALL THEM AT THE START IS SIMPLY THAT YOU NEED A SENSE OF URGENCY, AS A DISTINCT TYPE OF EMOTION TO DO ANYTHING, THAT IS HOW YOUR CHILD CURRENTLY CONTROLS YOU, SO THAT IS HOW YOU CAN LEARN TO CONTROL IT AND YOU- TO EVOKE A SENSE OF URGENCY FOR ANY CHANGE YOU WANT, CONSCIOUSLY, INSTEAD OF HAVING IT FORCED ON YOU. PRACTICE EVOKING THE URGENCY TO RESIST THE URGENCY OF YOU THE CHILDS REACTIONS, AND SO KNOW HOW FUCKING IMPORTANT THAT IS…
SEE ITS TIME TO GET ‘ENTHUISATIC’ WHICH IS A FEELING THAT CONSISTS OF ‘URGENCY’ AND ‘AGENCY’, THEN ‘REJECT THE AUTHENTICITY’ OF YOUR OLD ‘AUTHORITIES’ OVER YOU, REJECT ALL THE SHIT THAT IS STOPPING YOU CHANGING, AND GET THE FUCK ON WITH IT – IT IS THE ONLY WAY YOU WILL EVER BE FREE OF ALL YOUR ‘POINTLESS ANXIETIES’ AND YOUR ‘POINTLESS DESIRE FOR RELIEF FROM THEM’ = YOUR CHILD..
PLEASE DON’T DELUDE YOURSELF – THIS IS NOT SPIRITUALITY TODAY, THIS IS ABOUT GETTING TO THE LEVEL OF A HUMAN BEING, GETTING ABOVE THE CHILDISH SLAVE ANIMAL OF YOU. SEE CONSCIOUS YOU DOES NOT REALIZE IT HAS THE POWER TO CONSCIOUSLY CONTROL ‘IT’, CONSCIOUS YOU DOES NOT KNOW WHAT OR EVEN WHERE THE SIMPLE CONTROLS ARE, LET ALONE HOW TO USE THEM IN ORDER OF ESCAPE AND OVERIDE THE NO CHARACTER OF A CHILD. CONSCIOUS YOU IS AN UN-USED MUSCLE, CONTENT TO SIT AND WATCH ITS ‘LIFE HAPPEN TO IT’, WITH A SAME-SHIT DIFFERENT-DAY BEMUSEMENT OF A FOOL – YOU MUST UNDERSTAND YOUR CONCIOUSNESS IS A CONTROL ROOM, THE BRIDGE OF A SHIP AND START GIVING ‘ORDERS’.
YES, UNDERSTAND – ITS NOT THAT ‘I’ AM THAT SMART TODAY, IT IS THAT YOU ARE THAT BLOODY STUPID, INDEED SO STUPID THAT ALL THE URGENCY AND AGENCY THAT YOU COULD EASILY USE TO BE ‘BETTER THAN’ ARE WASTED ON BEING SLIGHTLY MORE COMFORTUABLE, TO GET SOME RELIEF FROM ‘THE DESIRE FOR RELIEF’, THE EMPTY MENTAL TENSION OF IT, FOR A MOMENT… What a waste, eh – A WASTE OF THE AWESOMENESS YOU WERE BORN WITH – so is this little poo bag of smelly dogshit all you are ever going to be then?
So read on then, learn something about yourself today, then find the sand to be disgusted by it, AND CHANGE. DON’T WAIT UNTIL YOU CANNOT COMFORT YOURSELF ANYMORE, DON’T WAIT FOR YOU THE CHILD TO FALL APART INTO NARCISSIM, ADHD, PARASITIC BEHAVIOURS OR THE OBLIVION OF MEDICATION – before YOUR SELF INFLICITED WEAKNESS OVERWHELMS YOU, AS YOU WILL BE TOO WEAK TO CHANGE – YOU MUST FIND A WAY TO MAKE YOUR EVENTUAL FAILURE TO GO ON AS A CHILD painfully ‘REAL’, AND ‘NOW’, SO THERE IS STILL ENOUGH OF YOU LEFT TO DO IT. SO LOOK AROUND, LOOK AT ALL THE OTHERS LIKE YOU THAT ARE ALREADY LONG GONE, LOOK AT THE DISGUSTING PARASITIC MESS OF THEM, THE DESPERATION OF THEM, THE TEDIOUS UGLINESS OF THEM, AND KNOW SOON, THAT WILL BE YOU…
I was LUCKY in this regard, I was able to see my family history, so I knew how it ended when I was still at the the top of my game, when I still loved it, I SAW THE EARLY, CERTAIN PAINFUL DEATH OF IT ‘TOMORROW’. You don’t HAVE THIS REALIZATION I know, and that is a bitch, but you must find a way anyway, as that is where your URGENCY WILL COME FROM – where your new desire to continually ‘FORCE THE NEED’ TO CHANGE on you the child AS A NEW MINDSET WILL COME FROM, most likely, OTHERWISE ALL THE MOMENTS OF A CHILDS MINDSET WILL JUST MAKE YOU FORGET, OR SIDE TRACK IT AS ANOTHER DUSTY OLD HOBBY – YOU WILL FAIL BEFORE YOU KNOW IT, AND ONLY COME TOO WHEN YOU ARE NO LONGER ABLE TO DO IT, WHEN YOU ‘SICKEN YOURSELF’…
Without this SHOCK, ‘YOU THE UNHELPABLE CHILD’ are doomed to go on with your chosen form of self-destruction, AND KNOWING ALL THIS STUFF WILL ACTUALLY MAKE IT MUCH WORSE, IN THE END. See, ‘they’ are right, there actually is a special kind of personal hell for those who know what to do, but do nothing – LIKE YOU. But what do you care eh, YOU HAVE ALREADY FORGOTTEN WHAT YOU READ 10 SECONDS AGO – THIS IS HOW YOU THE CHILD PROTECTS ITSELF, IT MAKES YOU FORGET ALL THE TIME, WHICH IS WHY YOU CAN’T REALLY REMEMBER YOUR CHILDHOOD IN THE DAY TO DAY SENSE OF IT = PERSONAL HELL.
So I will give you one last little trick TO HELP YOU GET STARTED, to use when you find yourself stuck in some sequence of moments overwhelmed by petty fear/desire/boredom – THAT IS THE MINDSET OF A 12Y/O GIRL, BUT YOU ARE NOT A 12Y/O GIRL ARE YOU, YOU HAVE SIMPLY FORGOTTEN YOURSELF, AGAIN. SO GO TO A MIRROR, LOOK AT YOURSELF AND REMIND YOURSELF OF ALL THE MILESTONES OF YOUR LIFE THAT HAVE BROUGHT YOU HERE TO THIS MOMENT, BUT NOT AS GOOD OR BAD, JUST AS A NARRATIVE HISTORY WRITTEN THOUSANDS OF YEARS IN THE FUTURE BY A INTERESTED HISTORIAN LOOKING FOR A GOOD, EXCITING ADVENTURE STORY TO TELL HIS ALIEN MASTER – look for the plot line, all the interesting twists and turns is the key to it.
THEN KNOW ‘THAT IS WHO YOU ARE’ AS YOU THE ADULT, THAT IS WHAT YOUR MINDSET SHOULD BE IN ORDER TO START THIS CYCLE OF CHANGE – THE MEMORY OF YOUR EXPEREINCE OF YOUR LIFE, WHICH WILL THEN CRUSH ALL YOUR LITTLE NEEDY MOMENTARY CRAP TO DUST – IT WILL NOT BE URGENT ANYMORE, AS IT WILL NOT BE THAT SCAREY, THAT SEXY, THAT BORING, AS BY COMPARISON TO YOUR HISTORY IT NEVER WAS IN THE FIRST PLACE. REMEMBER HOW YOU LOOK IN THE MIRROR – MAKE A POINT OF BURNING IT INTO YOUR MIND – BECAUSE THAT IMAGE IS YOUR HISTORY NOW, SO THAT IMAGE IS YOUR CHARACTER, YOUR AGENCY.
SEE THAT, IN YOUR MINDS EYE, THE TRUTH IS YOU DON’T LOOK LIKE A LOST, LONELY AND CONFUSED 12 Y/O GIRL do you, AND HOWEVER SHOCKING THIS DIFFERENCE TO YOUR MOMENTARY REALITY IS, ‘YOU’ CAN NOW KINDA REMEMBER YOURSELF. SO ITS BEST TO STOP THINKING LIKE A 12 Y/O, AND GET ON WITH THE ADVENTURE OF YOUR LIFE, plus you can stop boring the motherfucking shit out of me – TRY AND BE ‘INTERESTING TO YOURSELF’ IN THE 3RD PERSON, ‘YOU THE PROTAGONIST’ OF YOUR ADVENTURE STORY AS ‘A SENSE OF SELF’, so you BECOME interested in what happens to you, NEXT, even have a goal or too that is not forced on you by circumstance.
However much YOUR STORY may not be ALL THAT, it a damn sight better than continually ‘forgeting your 3rd party self’, forgetting your STATUS, your RANK, your CONSEQUENCE THAT IS LITERALLY EMBEDDED IN YOUR HISTORY, out of your pathetic weakness of ‘no-character’. SO FIND A SENSE OF YOUR SELF YOU ENJOY BEING, IE ENJOY REMINDING YOURSELF YOU ARE BECAUSE YOU HAVE ‘DONE IT’. BUT KEEP IT REAL, YOUR HISTORY IS NOT A FANTASY, IT ACTUALLY HAPPENED, SO FIND SOMETHING YOU LIKE ABOUT IT AND TURN THE PAGE TO WHAT YOU WANT TO HAPPEN NEXT – YOUR ‘BETTER THAN’, should you get around to deciding that you in the 3rd person is ‘worth the effort’, EVEN IF THAT IS JUST CHANGING YOUR APPEARANCE TO SUIT YOUR ADVENTURE.
These are some of the simpler controls available to CONSCIOUS YOU over YOU THE CHILDISH SLAVE ANIMAL, so now if you choose not to use them YOU ONLY HAVE YOURSELF TO BLAME, don’t you, BECAUSE YOU HAVE NO SENSE OF URGENCY, NO SENSE OF YOUR HISTOY, NO SENSE OF HOW YOU LOOK. But if you only tried these things you would quickly see the truth in them, many of the gifted amongst would be surprised to discover that you already do some little half assed version of them IN SOME WAY THAT IS LINKED TO YOUR GIFT – YOUR GIFT IS ALWAYS TRYING TO HELP YOU BE BETTER THAN, however much you pervert it.
So ‘ACCEPT’ HERE AND NOW ‘THE AUTHORITY’ OF THIS TRUTH ‘OVER YOU’, ACCEPT MY AUTHORITY, MY ROLE IN YOUR LIFE, THE REASON SOMETHING HAS BROUGHT YOU HERE TO HELP YOU BY READING THIS, whatever silly little REASON you the child tells YOU. See before you change to something you must know what you are changing from, THE REALITY RIGHT NOW – YOU MUST REPLACE ‘COMFORTING FANTASY’ WITH INTERESTING REALITY BY ‘ACCEPTING IT’, first.
SO ACCEPT THE TRUTH OF THIS – YOU THE CHILD DOES NOT WANT YOU TO BE HAPPY, POWERFUL, IT DOES NOT WANT YOU TO HAVE A CONSISTENT, STRONG ‘SENSE OF SELF’ AS THE BADASS, FUCK YOU ‘ATTITUDE’ YOU SO DESPERATLEY NEED TO PROTECT YOU FROM ‘THEM’, FROM THE GUTLESS LITTLE ANIMALS, THAT SNIFF AROUND YOU LIKE LITTLE RATS, LOOKING FOR SCRAPS, AND SETTING TRAPS. YOU THE CHILD, WITH ALL THE WEAK, STUPID, SELF-SERVING ‘AUTHORITIES’ WITH NO AUTHORITY IT HAS GOT YOU TO PLACE ‘OVER YOURSELF’, WANTS YOU TO BE WEAK AND DEPENDENT, BY GIVING YOU JUST ENOUGH COMFORT AND CLEVERNESS TO KEEP YOU A WILLING SLAVE. But you are not clever, you have no secrets, no agency, no energy, no urgency, do you – you have LOST, SO SEE ‘THE DEFEAT’ OF YOUR LIFE IN THAT STUPIDITY.
YES – SEE IT FOR WHAT IT IS, THIS LITTLE LIFE OF YOURS – ITS A CON, A CURSE, A JOKE, BUT YOU HAVE TO SEE THAT YOURSELF, AS THEN YOU WILL NEVER GO BACK TO THE HAVING THE 1 DIMENSIONAL GOAL OF ‘COMFORT’ ABOVE ALL ELSE – THE GOAL OF NO GOAL, THE GOAL OF SLAVE ANIMALS. SEE EVEN THE COWS IN THE FIELD KNOW BETTER THAN THAT, THEY FUCKING HATE THE FARMERS, KILLING THEM ANY CHANCE THEY GET EVEN AT THE COST OF THEIR OWN LIVES, ‘CAUSE THEY KNOW THAT FARMER WILL KILL THEM FOR FOOD SOON ENOUGH, WHATEVER THEY DO TO ‘PLAY NICE’…
So before you read on today, know this very simply – YOU ARE NOT A RIVAL, NOT AN ENEMY, NOT A WORTHY FOE OR CUNNING NEMISIS, YOU NEVER WERE, YOU, IN YOUR CURRENT STATE, ARE AN ‘OBJECT OF PITY’, THIS WAR YOU ARE FIGHTING IS ALL AN ILLUSION IN YOUR HEAD, LIKE A SCRATCHY STRAY WHO FIGHTS SIMPLY BECAUSE THAT IS ALL THEY KNOW. So take this chance now to SEE YOUR DEFEAT AND ACCEPT IT IN THE ONLY USEFUL WAY FORWARD THERE IS FOR A CHILD – TO RE-INVENT YOURSELF AND CHANGE SIDES BY FOLLOWING A BETTER AUTHORITY THAN THE ONE YOU HAVE, THE ONE THAT HAS LED YOU TO THIS UTTER HUMILIATION AND FUNCTIONAL NOTHINGNESS, TO YOUR LOWEST EBB AND FLOW.
THEN ‘START AGAIN’ IN SECRET, QUIETLY, and let your DEVELOPMENT BECOME YOUR GOAL, YOUR NEW SECRET, INNER LIFE – YES, YOUR CURRENT WEAKNESS MEANS YOU CANNOT PUBLICALLY REJECT MANY OF YOUR ‘OBLIGATIONS’ YET, YOU MUST BARE ALL THESE VIELED THREATS AGAINST YOU, UNTIL YOU GET STRONG ENOUGH, UNTIL YOU HAVE RECOVERED YOURSELF ENOUGH TO CRUSH THEM, BEFORE THEY CRUSH YOU. SO YOUR NEW GOAL, THE INTERIM MARKER YOU NEED TO REACH, IS YOUR ‘INDEPENDENCE DAY’, THAT IS WHAT THIS ABOUT NOW, THAT IS HOW YOU LOOK AT IT, SO YOUR GOAL OF ‘THE COMFORTUABLE NOTHINGNESS OF BEARABLE SLAVERY’ IS GONE, AS IT IS, AND FRANKLY ALWAYS WAS, ‘THE ENEMY’.
YES – THESE ARE SIMPLE THINGS I KNOW, BUT YOU MUST GET EXCITED ABOUT THEM, ENERGIZE THEM IN ORDER TO FIGHT THE MECHANICALNESS OF ‘YOU THE HARMLESS CHILD’ – YOUR MINDSET, WHICH HAS NOT CHANGED SINCE YOUR EARLY TEENS, WILL FIGHT BACK, AS THESE CHANGES MEAN ITS DEATH. SO ARE YOU UP FOR THIS FIGHT YET, ARE YOU UP FOR THE MAGICAL, SUPERNATURAL WORLD THAT IS YOUR DESTINY, YOUR BIRTHRIGHT?
Hope so, as for many of you it has been sitting patiently waiting for you to SEE IT THIS WHOLE TIME, whilst trying to keep your dumb ass alive, in the meantime. But you still have doubts I guess, so know this – DO YOU HONESTLY THINK ANYONE LIKE ME WOULD EVER BOTHER WITH YOU, IF WE DID NOT KNOW THIS TO BE TRUE, TO WASTE A MOMENT ON YOU, THE CRINGY LITTLE FUCK UP – SO WHAT WOULD BE THE POINT OF ALL THIS THEN? Seriously bitch, surely you are not that fucking retarded – THE AUTHORITY OF THE TRUTH SPEAKS FOR ITSELF, IT DOES NOT NEED A GANG, MUCH AS WE HAVE ONE OF THOSE AS WELL…
So read on and ‘welcome’ to the REAL WORLD, I look forward to your progress, whether I ever meet you or not, just know that in this world you don’t ‘go along to get along’ like you have tried to do all these years, see in this world, in ACTUAL REALITY, ‘you kill or be killed’. This is not to be dramatic so much at this stage, as to make the point that the quid pro quo lifestyle of a slave, your whole old approach to life ‘has to go’ – you cannot continue to trade away the little quality you have for an easier life and expect to succeed in anything, so you must get that sometimes ‘you need to fight’, in order to discover the power of winning those fights, even if you occasionally fail. It is a new Attitude you are required to employ now, simply because it REPLACES the attitude of A SLAVE, with that of a human being…
And yes, its a hell of a change for ya, lost in the fantasy of the secondhand power of a slave to make you feel the fake relief of a child, all alone in your inferiority complex, but best get used to it all the same – THE ‘MORALITY’ OF SUPERNATURAL IS IN THE OLD TESTAMENT, NOT THE NEW ONE. See, when you actually ARE INFERIOR, WHEN ‘YOU LIVE IN CONSTANT FEAR’, there is fuck all point in pretending to be badass, YOU ARE ‘SADASS’, BY DEFINITION – YOUR LIFE COULD BE DETROYED IN A MOMENT, AND ALL YOU COULD DO IS CALL THE POLICE, afterwards, when you have already ‘LOST’ the little you have.
One last little teacher secret to get you started, fast? Go on then – YOU THE CHILD IS ALL IN ‘YOUR TRAIN OF THOUGHT’, SO IF YOU BREAK THAT CHAIN, IF YOU STOP THINKING, EVEN FOR JUST A MOMENT, YOU CAN WAKE UP AND SEE YOURSELF FOR REAL, outside of the constant re-assuring, justifications of a KID. That is WHY YOU THE CHILD NEVER LETS YOU STOP THINKING, EVEN MAKING YOU OVER THINK WHENEVER YOU TRY AND HELP YOURSELF, yet you think that is a good thing, don’t you, YOU DON’T SEE ITS DEFENDING ITSELF, because it power over you is ‘threatened’ – ITS AUTHORITY is DOUBTED, so YOU MAYBE WRONG ABOUT EVERYTHING, BUT ITS ‘NOT YOU’, ITS ‘IT’ THAT IS WRONG.
AS A CHILD EVERYTHING IS ABOUT ‘THE AUTHORITY’ YOU ‘CHOOSE TO PLACE OVER YOURSELF’, so choose wisely – YOU HAVE NO POWER TO THINK FOR YOURSELF, YOU JUST REACT, SO SOMETHING ‘BETTER THAN’ YOU MUST THINK FOR YOU, ON BEHALF OF YOU, TO YOUR BENEFIT.
Be clear – even when you TRY YOUR BEST, you are forced to go in circles by YOUR CHILDISH MINDSET, that is the CURSE OF IT, why you must look OUTISDE OF YOURSELF for the help YOU NEED INSIDE YOURSELF, SO YOU MUST REALIZE ‘WHAT YOU ARE’, BY SEEING ‘WHY’ YOU ACTUALLY ‘WANT TO DO’, WHAT YOU ‘ACTUALLY DO’ – THEN THE ANCIENT GREEK ADVICE OF THE MYSTERY SCHOOLS, CARVED ON THAT STONE AT DELPHI 3000ys AGO, WILL MAKE SENSE…
Lastly should be be clever enough to despair slightly at this point don’t – ‘you have made it through this far in an unforgiving place’, so its all good. See you are missing the point, there is no point in despair, AS THERE IS NOTHING INSIDE YOU TO DESPAIR ABOUT. You are an opinionless void, inside you where your character should be is an empty vessel, an echo chamber, SO TAKE YOURSELF LIGHTLY, and SEE THE ACTUAL FUN OF THIS ADVENTURE, SEE YOUR SPIRIT IN IT, THE ONLY THING ABOUT YOU WORTH A DAMN – you will be dead and forgotten soon enough.
YOU ARE STARTING FROM NOTHING, so you have nothing to lose but your own petty little middle class perversions, and even they are so tame that nobody really gives a shit, do they. Some folks, much meaner and far less woke than my good self, may even say that ‘You wack, you twisted, your girl’s a ho, You broke, the kid ain’t yours and everybody know’ (Sorry, DMX), just creeping around and stinking out up the place with your low quality b/s like a TWAT. Go figure, eh, some of these 4th wayers are a bunch of Nazi bastards like, just laughing at ya, burn your whole life down just to teach you a ‘lesson’, but not me of course – I’M ‘GOOD’, and that is not just my ‘Messiah Complex’ talking, see I just PITY you, that’s how I know I’m good…
Have a nice life anyway, time for me to bolt the door and the ring the bell – its scares away the crazies, LIKE YOU. If it helps at all try and remember, best you can, whatever you do – all of your PUBLIC humiliations, as the advertisement of your SECRET LIFE are done to you ON PURPOSE, both by YOU THE CHILD AND ITS CHOSEN AUTHORITY OVER YOU – YOU ARE SO STUPID THAT EVEN SEEIN THAT YOU THINK IT IS ‘BETTER THAN NOTHING’. It is the very definition of being a child – TO BELIEVE YOU HAVE SECRETS, SIMPLY BECAUSE YOU SO DESPERATELY NEED TO, but even me telling you this does not really help, does it, AS YOU ARE THAT DESPERATE. So grow up or burn little girl, your choice like, I don’t care, DO YOU?
SO, FOR THE STRONGEST AMONGST YOU PLEASE SEE THIS AND ACCEPT IT – TO BE ‘WHAT YOU ARE’, TO BECOME YOURSELF, THEN ‘WHAT YOU ARE NOT’ RIGHT NOW HAS TO LOSE, AND CONSCIOUS YOU AS TO SEE THAT LOSS, AND UNDERSTAND WHY. IT IS THE ANCIENT WAY, THE MYSTERY SCHOOL WAY, AND FOR THE MOST GIFTED OF YOU, IT IS THE ONLY WAY. YOUR GIFT KNOWS THIS, AND IS PUTTING YOU THROUGH YOUR VERY OWN ‘RITE OF PASSAGE’ IN ORDER TO ACHIEVE THIS NOW, BUT YOU FIGHT IT STILL, LONG AFTER YOU ALREADY KNOW YOU FINAL DEFEAT IS INEVITABLE.
SO LOSE, LOSE AS COMPLETELY AS YOU CAN, EMBRACE THE FAILURE OF YOU THE CHILD, YOUR EGO, SO YOU CAN START AGAIN, REINVENT YOURSELF AS A CLEAN SLATE. THERE IS NOTHING I CAN DO FOR YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE THIS JUMP, MUCH AS I WISH I WAS SMART ENOUGH TO KNOW MORE THAN MY ANCESTORS, I AM NOT, SO THIS TEST, WHICH YOU MUST PASS, REMAINS THE WAY IT HAS ALWAYS BEEN – YOU MUST WANT TO LOSE, TO BE DIFFERENT. BUT THERE IS NO NEED TO BECOME RELIGIOUS, NO NEED TO BE BORN AGAIN, TO FOLLOW THE WILL OF GOD, YOU MUST SIMPLY LOSE, REJECT ALL THE OLD AUTHORITY OVER YOU BECAUSE OF THAT LOSS, AND THEN GET USED TO ‘DOUBTING EVERYTHING’ YOU THINK YOU THE CHILD KNOWS, SECRETLY…
If it HELPS AT ALL try and SEE WHAT HAS HAPPENED – YOU HAVE ‘ALREADY LOST’, LONG AGO, you are just compensating for it, stuck in a loop of LOSING as a set of comforting patterns that cover up the truth with CLEVERNESS. This self-destructive stupidity is the end of many of highly gifted woman, yet THEY GO TO THE GRAVE WITH IT, so if that is YOU, I can only hope YOU NOW UNDERSTAND TO CHANGE IS ACTUALLY TO ‘STOP LOSING’ and starting WINNING AGAIN.
SO KICK THE STOOL OUT FROM UNDER YOUR DESPERATION TO JUSTY THE HORRIBLE SHIT YOU HAVE DONE BECAUSE OF IT, ACCEPT IT WAS MADNESS, AND MOVE ON. See nobody, including ME, cares about YOU THE CHILD because IT IS TOXIC, nobody gives the smallest fuck what your parasitic little gang thinks, AS EVERYONE THINKS YOU ARE A BUNCH OF LITTLE FREAKS – in ‘your’ head it all makes perfect sense, BUT IT IS NONSENSE, ALL OF IT, IT ALWAYS WAS. ANYTHING DONE OUT OF THE URGENT DESPERATION TO BE ‘RIGHT’ IS A CON, THAT LEADS TO YOUR CONTINUAL HUMILIATION – SEE IT, THERE IS NO UPSIDE, THE COMFORTING CLEVERNESS OF YOUR OWN PETTY SELF DESTRUCTION AS ‘A MOMENTARY SENSE OF RELIEF’ IS JUST DUMB AS FUCK, SEE IT..
The key to this ‘seeing’, for many if not most of you is knowing which single card holds up the whole bizarre mental construct of your fragile little house of cards, the one that makes all of this shit ‘OK’ – SO KNOW THE MOST COMMON ONE, IN MY EXPEREINCE, IS TO REALIZE YOUR CHOSENS AUTHORITY DOES NOT HAVE YOUR BACK, AT ALL. YOUR CHOSEN AUTHORITY BENEFITS FROM YOUR DESTRUCTION, YOUR HUMILIATION, SHAMING YOU ON PURPOSE, LYING TO YOU BECAUSE IT CANNOT BARE YOUR ESCAPE, YOUR ‘BETTER THAN THEM’ – THEY must ‘SHOW’ THE WORLD ‘HOW DUMB’ YOU ARE, ‘PUBLICALLY’, ITS THE POINT OF YOU, YOUR UTILITY.
See you ‘MUST SUFFER FOR THEM’, as they can’t cope otherwise, so take a friendly word of advice, look at your ‘extremes’, and know that you have all the POWER, so you are actually YOUR OWN AUTHORITY, you always were FAR, FAR more powerful than them – SEE THAT, THEN STOP and CHANGE YOUR AUTHORITY. You must BREAK THE SPELL, stop letting YOU THE CHILD AND THEM use your credulity, your gullibility, your desire to throw good money after bad AGAINST YOU – YOU MUST ACTUALLY HAVE AN ‘IDENTITY CRISIS’ (Sorry, Wokeness), because you see your old (not so) secret identity IS A CONJOB, and YOU HAVE BEEN BETRAYED, HUNG OUT TO DRY, ONE TO MANY TIMES.
That is were you start, BECAUSE THAT IS YOUR ‘PAIN POINT’, and that pain is the ‘STRENGTH TO CHANGE’ IN THE MOMENT OF NEEDING IT, instead of lapsing back into the weakness of comforting yourself for being NOTHING, again. This is where your NEW SENSE OF SELF, YOU BETTER THAN IDENTITY WILL ‘START’, so however much you LOVE FEELING LIKE A ‘DANGEROUS WOMAN’, you can actually start to do that the right way, instead of the awful, public, humiliating bollocks you are making of it, currently. See the Gifted version of this is to be FREE, and only works if you are FREE TO CHOOSE, but you are not, are you.
SO YOU MUST REMAIN CONSCIOUS THAT SUFFERING THE CONSTANT ANXIETY OF A CHILD HAS MADE YOU ‘SUBSERVIANT’ VIA WEAKNESS AS NORMAL, SO TO ALSO PUT YOUR SPIRIT INTO THE COMFORTS OF SUBSERVIENCE IS GIFTED SUICIDE, YOU ONLY PUT YOUR GIFT INTO WHAT MAKES YOU STRONGER. Never under estimate the power of this ‘SLAVE CONDITIONING’, it is insidious, because it makes subservience comfortable, and challenge un-comfortable – it was perfected by the Romans thousands of years ago, which they called ‘seasoning’, to BREAK THE SPIRIT OF CAPTIVES.
If you find you cannot do even EASY conflict at all without extreme dis-comfort YOU MUST MAKE A POINT OF BREAKING THIS CONDITIONING AS JOB 1, as there is no way forward with that level of vulnerability to parasites, particuarly the ones who pretend to be your friends, who are nice, who reward your utility, whilst shaming you behind the scenes for kicks – YOU MUST BREAK THE SPELL OVER YOU, BY SIMPLY DOING IT ANYWAY, BUT PRACTICE IN SMALL THINGS, FIRST…
So that is it – simply know you STILL have the mindset of a child and resolve to remain conscious of it in all you do, use a self consciousness trick like remaining aware of how you look good before you move onto BOTTLE, PLUS that YOU are clearly no longer a 13y/o girl. In this way you will learn the conscious controls of yourself, and then want to use them, rather than simply comfort yourself for still being a little kid, BY REJECTING THE AUTHORITY OF BOTH THAT LITTLE KID AND THE NASTY, PARASITIC ‘EXTERNAL AUTHORITIES’ THAT LITTLE KID HAS TRICKED YOU INTO PUTTING OVER YOUR LIFE.
See YOU did not make these mistakes, IT did, and that is one of the greatest get outa jail free cards you will ever find, AS IT WILL ALLOW YOU TO DISOWN THE EMBARRISSMENT OF DISOWNING YOUR PAST SELF AS ‘WRONG’ – NONE OF THIS HORRIBLE LITTLE FREAK SHOW OF SHIT WAS ACTUALLY YOU. IT IS A FREAK, IT IS 2 FACED, IT IS DISLOYAL, IT IS AN HABITUAL LIAR, IT HAS ADHD, IT IS A NARCISSIST, IT IS UNSTABLE, IT IS AN ADDICT, IT IS LAZY, IT IS DELUSIONAL, IT IS A BLIND, STUPID, CLEVER LITTLE WHORE, NOT YOU – DISOWN IT, THEN YOU WILL SMELL BETTER TO US.
So all of this is easy, practical, and – should you be someone who mainlines attention as your drug of choice, because you are unaware that attention is simply the TRIGGER for the feeling of your SPIRIT, (and this is a much better one of those same triggers) – IT IS ‘THE CURE’ FOR ALL EXTERNAL WEAKNESS OF YOUR ‘NO CHARACTER’. So why not get the fuck on with it – remind your woke little self that YOUR BETTER THAN is not about actual superiority to others, IT IS ABOUT NOT FEELING INFERIOR, which will feel like BEING SUPERIOR to you, simply because YOU A STUCK IN THE MINDSET OF A CHILD.
FEEL SUPERIOR WITH A CLEAR HEAD – IT IS REQUIRED TO BREAK YOUR INFERIORITY, and honestly for many of you I know from back in the day it is a very small correction to your current lifestyle, AS YOU ALREADY CHASE A PERVERTED VERSION OF IT, like a big kid. The world is full of happy, successful, popular, rich, beautiful, famous, powerful RUTHLESS PEOPLE, because they have learnt to be RUTHLESS with themselves FIRST, and CUT OUT WHAT DOES NOT WORK. If you ‘suffer from anxiety’ then YOU SUFFER FROM YOU THE CHILD, simply because it wants you to suffer – TAKE A KNIFE TO IT, given what it has done to the ‘once amazing you’, that it is responsible for the trivial, forgettable mess you are now, it deserves to die, don’t you think…
But never forget the DANGER OF THE AUTHORITIES YOU THE CHILD HAS PLACED OVER YOU – it is the reason I have added this section for modern people. See even when you want to CHANGE THOSE AUTHORITIES WILL STOP YOU, because they need you to SUFFER, SO THEY FEEL BETTER, SO THEY FEEL CLEVER. So SEE THE TRUTH, YOU THE CHILD ACTS THROUGH THOSE AUTHORITIES TO CONTROL YOU, BUT THOSE AUTHORITIES ARE SCARED SHITLESS OF YOU. YOU OWE THEM NOTHING, so never feel sorry for happens to them, they all have it coming – THEY ARE PARASITES, SO THEY ARE DOMINATED BY A PAINFUL SENSE OF THE MOST BASIC ANIMAL EMOTION – A CRUSHING SENSE OF JEALOUSY = THE MOST BASIC OF ALL BITCHES = THEY ARE ‘DOGS IN A MANGER’.
So Be Lucky, Be Ruthless – ‘kill or be killed’, there is no comfort in being controlled by jealous freaks, no power in desperation, so CHOOSE A BETTER AUTHORITY, now – you must make this new authority ACTIVE, you must have a relationship with it in order to replace the old ones, as no matter how weak and parasitic they are, their persistence will continually drag ‘your utility’ back in otherwise. See they are all you have WHEN YOU ARE STILL A CHILD, desperate to comfort yourself, and that is just too pathetic for words, don’t you think – TO DESTROY YOURSELF SIMPLY BECAUSE YOU NEED ‘SOMETHING STRANGE’ TO GET THROUGH THE DAY…
Let go of the past and move on – CHOOSE BETTER AUTHORITIES – YOU NEVER KNOW, IF YOU CAN START TO CARE ABOUT WHAT HAPPENS TO YOU THEN OTHER, MUCH BETTER PEOPLE THAN YOU, MAY START TO CARE ABOUT WHAT HAPPENS TO YOU, AS YOU MAY THEN ACTUALLY BE WORTH IT, once you decide to ‘STOP BEING AN INSIGNIFICANT INSECT’ that is here today and gone tomorrow, and nut up to ‘having a go at life’, at BEING SERIOUS = CONSISTENT.
Just don’t END YOUR LIFE as one more JEALOUS LITTLE TWAT, eh, some ‘DRUNK WASHED UP IN AUSTIN’, they are always such DESPERATE LOSERS, such repulsive, obvious, ugly little people, even their fake friends hate them, so they betray them every chance they get just to protect themselves, as then they can pretend to themselves that they are ‘good’, at least for a moment. See, should YOU EVER HIT THIS MILESTONE ‘YOURSELF’, of being ONE MORE OBSESSIONALLY JEALOUS PARASITE, a toxic narcissist, then it is best to know that even the PITY of ‘GOOD’ bad men eventually runs out, and shit is just going to HAPPEN, even before ‘your society’ comes to lock you up…
CHOOSE WISELY, everything about you has ‘happened before’, so folks like me know what is ‘going to happen’, and its much, much later than you think – when everything ends, as everything always does, IT IS REALLY GOING TO HURT, as the clever desperation of a child, of hiding behind drug addiction and mental illness, won’t help YOU THE NASTY LITTLE KID. See, your shit only appears ‘cool’ when its ‘secret’, when its public you will officially be ‘DISGUSTING’ (Sorry, P.Diddy) – funny when you think about it, you the kid can make even the most grubby, repulsive shit SEEM cool just by making it secret, so it seems ‘exclusive’, ‘exciting’, but all it really means is that YOU’RE A GULLIBLE DORK, trying to feel special, INCLUDED, because you don’t see THE LONELY LITTLE KID ‘WHO IS DRIVING’…
Ok, sorry, my bad – its not that funny really, GUESS ITS KINDA SAD WHEN ITS YOU. Just try and see that JOKE, that you so desperately need to feel clever, is on YOU, bitch, then you won’t be fooled quite so easily next time, maybe. See you MUST ESCAPE THE OBLIGATIONS that control you, you must MOVE ON, otherwise your weakness with devour your life, both internally and externally, so STOP PUTTING TRASH ON A PEDESTAL, your ‘BETTER THAN’ is the only AUTHORITY YOU PLACE OVER YOURSELF, STOP the banal middle class comforts of NOTHINGNESS – YOUR SOCIETY IS FLAWED, IT IS ABOUT ‘CONSUMPTION’ NOT PROGRESS…
If you like, WHY DON’T YOU JUST GET MAD AND ‘TRY’ BEING SCARY, for a change – its EASY REALLY, much as you won’t actually be scary obviously, but you may come across as slightly less of a vulnerable, scattered, lazy ass ‘doormat’, for a moment. The Go To strategy of ‘seeking comfort by being overly kind’ is the death of so many gifted types these days its actually beyond a joke. SO YOU LEARN THE SKILL OF BEING ‘VICIOUS’ WITH YOURSELF AND THE ANIMALS, THAT IS ALL THEY UNDERSTAND, THE PAIN OF YOUR ‘CONSEQEUNCE’, as being ‘SLIGHTYLY LESS NICE’ AS A FORM OF PUNISHING YOUR ABUSERS DOES NOT DO SHIT. See they think you are DEPENDANT fool to start with, so TELLING THEM THEY ARE ‘DEAD TO YOU NOW’ just makes them laugh even more…
KNOW THE DEVELOPMENT OF CONSEQUENCE, of the need to be EN-GUARD in this life, is the beginning of CONSISTENCY, what so many flakey, every changing MODERN PEOPLE LACK, which you the child loves, AS IT MAKES INCREDIBLY EASY TO CONTROL – YOU HAVE NO FIXED OPINIONS, AT ALL. However hard this always is for folks like me to understand, UNLESS you develop some RELIABILITY IN YOURSELF, you THE COMFORT SEEKING DORK will NEVER HAVE ‘A SENSE OF SELF’ THAT IS STABLE ENOUGH TO BE USEFUL. Just note that to DEVELOP CONSEQUENCE you most go against the powerful people in your life, not pick on others the same as you, AS THAT IS ‘SAFE’, so will not change you – SO YOU STAND UP TO THE AUTHORITIES YOU HAVE PLACED OVER YOURSELF.
SEE your felt CONSEQUENCE, YOUR INDEPENDENCE REPLACES SUBSERVIENCE, IT REMOVES THE URGE TO BE A SLAVE AND ‘GO ALONG TO GET ALONG’, GET IT YET? So find a PAIN POINT that is CONSISTENT ENOUGH so you can GET STARTED, RELIABLY, otherwise you will continue to justify where you are NOW AS ‘OK’ – THE TRICK TO GROWING UP FOR SO MANY OF THE WEAKEST AMONGST YOU IS SIMPLY STARTING, OVER AND OVER AGAIN, BY DOUBLING DOWN ON THAT ‘PAIN OF SUBSERVIENCE TO AUTHORITY’. So stop making being NOTHING ‘BEARABLE’, and then you will WANT TO CHANGE – BEING NOTHING IS A DEATH SENTENCE, AS THEY WILL DESTROY YOU IN THE END, simply because they can…
You must learn to ‘manage out’ the old AUTHORITIES you the child has placed OVER YOU SO YOU DON’T HAVE TO FOLLOW IT, it is a key part of GROWING UP – WHEN YOU TRUST YOUR ‘CONSEQUENCE’, YOUR ‘CONSISTENCY’ then you will a ‘POWER-BASE’, A STABLE SOURCE POINT IN YOURSELF TO START FROM. You MUST TRUST THIS NEW AUTHORITY IN YOURSELF, as without this STRENGTH modern people just tend to blow back and forth in the wind, running to whatever ‘comfort of the moment’ appears, like stupid whores, AS THEY ‘DON’T WANT ANY TROUBLE’, so do whatever to avoid trouble as one more little comfort, FOR NO REASON OR NEED AT ALL. Trust ME, if your go to response to anyone who even mildly annoys you is VIOLENCE, folks with start to treat you way better…
SO CHOOSE YOUR AUTHORITIES WISELY, they are YOUR FATE – so much of the failure to grow up is down to the comfort of expectation, obligation and routine that surrounds you like a cage of banal nothingness. TO CHALLENGE THIS FATE OF NOTHINGNESS you must find a PAIN POINT TO GIVE YOU BOTH THE ENERGY AND THE URGENCY TO GO AGAINST THE WORSE OF IT – WITHOUT ‘THIS NEW AGENCY’ your FATE IS ALREADY SEALED. And without SAVING THE LITTLE ENERGY YOU HAVE TO PUT INTO GETTING SOME NEW ENERGY, then you will simply continue to fade away, whatever you think, WHATEVER YOU DO../
SO YOU MUST REMEMBER ALWAYS, AS YOU READ THE REST OF THIS POST…
TO CHANGE YOU ‘MUST’ CHANGE YOUR ‘MODE OF BEING’ FIRST, YOUR MINDSET IN ‘THE MOMENT OF CHANGE’.
SO YOU MUST LEARN HOW TO THROW A SWITCH IN YOURSELF TO ‘STEP UP’ YOUR GAME IN THAT MOMENT:
IN THOSE MOMENTS OF CHANGE YOU MUST SWITCH AWAY FROM THE PASSIVE REACTING THAT IS ‘COPING’.
AND YOU MUST EMBRACE THE ACTIVE ‘DOING OF CHANGE’, BY BEING DIFFERENT IN THE MOMENT – USE YOUR ENERGY.
THIS TAKES FREE ENERGY, A LOT OF ENERGY, SO YOU MUST GUARD YOUR ENERGY WITH YOUR LIFE, AS THIS WILL ‘STORE IT’.
BUT YOU HAVE NO FREE ENERGY, INDEED YOU HAVE AN ENERGY DEBT, OFTEN A HUGE ONE, WHICH IS WHY YOU ‘OVER THINK’. See, for the all the ADHD killers – the vulnerabilities to infatuation with what ever passes by, the emotional exhaustion, the constant fidgeting, the clumsiness, the blindness – just know THE KILLER ONE IS PROCASTINATION. These this is a way FOR YOU THE CHILD TO WASTE YOU ENERGY ON ACTIVE STOPPING – YOU ARE LITERALLY FIGHTING YOURSELF IN ORDER TO DO NOTHING, when whatever you could of done out of the choices WOULD OF BEEN BETTER THAN NOTHING.
This disease of the mind makes you the child waste the little energy You have on NOT DOING ANYTHING, even though YOU think that THINKING about doing stuff is doing stuff! BAD NEWS – DOING NOTHING DEGRADES YOUR ENERGY SYSTEM, PASSIVELY WATCHING, LISTENING, FEELING, so your ENERGY SYSTEM ‘SHRINKS’ A LITTLE MORE EVERYDAY, till around say your early 30s you notice you don’t have 50% of what you had in your late teens, YOUR STAMINA HAS GONE, which causes you to do even less, AND SHRINK EVEN QUICKER – YOU COMFORT YOURSELF FOR BEING WEAK, WHICH MAKES YOU EVEN WEAKER…
SO THIS NEW MODE YOU NEED HAS TO START WITH ENERGIZING YOURSELF TO DO WHAT YOU HAVE PREVIOUSLY DECIDED TO DO.
SEE THE GOLDEN RULE OF ENERGY IF YOU MUST USE IT TO KEEP IT, OTHERWISE YOUR ENERGY SYSTEM SHRINKS AND SHRINKS.
THEN ONE DAY, SOON ENOUGH YOU WILL WAKE UP NOT JUST CONFUSED, LOST AND TIRED, BUT ‘OLD’, ‘INCAPACITATED’.
THE BEST WAY TO SEE THIS IS NOT THAT YOU ARE DOING TASKS, BUT THAT YOU ARE BUILDING YOUR ENERGY TO CHANGE…
MAKE NO MISTAKE IF YOU CONTINUE TO PISS YOUR ENERGY AWAY ON COPING WITH COMFORT LIKE A DORK THEN THE SAME SAD SHIT THAT IS HAPPENING TO YOU NOW WILL JUST GET WORSE, AND WORSE, AND WORSE, UNTIL YOUR PUBLIC HUMILIATION IS SO TOTAL EVEN YOU WILL SEE IT ON THE FACES OF OTHERS. ALL THE PARASITIC CLEVERNESS IN THE FUCKING WORLD WON’T COMFORT YOUR ASS MUCH THEN, BECAUSE THE REALITY OF SHAME WILL CRUSH YOU – YOU ARE TOO WEAK TO DO ANYTHING YOU DON’T ALREADY DO AS A REACTION, YOU ARE A ‘ROBOTIC FUCK PUPPET’, NOTHING, BECAUSE YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND THAT FREE WILL TAKES ENERGY TO ‘USE’…
The goal is simple – BECOME A HUMAN BEING, WITH ENOUGH SELF CONSCIOUSNESS TO REALIZE YOU ARE NOT SELF CONSCIOUS MOST OF THE TIME, that normally you ‘simply exist’ on ‘automatic pilot’, so everything is the same, its looks the same, tastes the same, smells the same, sounds the same, and you DO THE SAMETHINGS. So what you aim for is to take CONTROL OF THE 10% OF YOURLIFE PRO-ACTIVELY, AS DECISIONS YOU THINK UP AND THEN LAUNCH ON THE YOUR WORLD OUT OF THE BLUE, that you are able to do when self-conscious, and CHOOSE HOW YOU REACT TO THE OTHER 90% YOU YOU HAVE NO CHANCE OF CONTROLLING, at an animal level of consciousness, even if that means you have to do the same dumb shit, AT LEAST NOW YOU KNOW ITS DUMB SHIT.
Please take this last statement deadly serious – IF YOU DON’T DO THIS SOON, then a time will come when your ability to do it will be GONE. See, way before you die, even before your health goes, your energy will decline to the point THAT YOU WILL HAVE NO ABILITY TO BE SELF CONSCIOUS, it will become HOPELESS even to try, and even the folks around you will start to see you are little more than a BORKEN RECORD, a stereotype. Without anything to react your mental world will start to close in on you, turn on you, with loads of little failings, ALL DRIVEN BY YOUR LEVEL OF ANXIETY, which means you have ‘BECOME DESPERATE’ – you are so weak that your anxieties spiral, skipping from one topic to the next, driving you to increasing levels of comfort, relief, oblivion.
DON’T IGNORE THIS WHEN ITS STARTS TO HAPPEN, IT IS TO DO WITH YOUR ENERGY DEBT AS A HEDONIST, use it as a spur TO CHANGE THE FOCUS OF YOUR LIFE AWAY FROM SLAVERY, TOWARD A PERSONAL DEDICATION TO ‘SELF CARE’, BY FOCUSING ON YOUR ENERGY LEVELS. If you don’t then you will not have a life worthy of the name much longer, everything you experience will become momentary, your moods will swing wildly to the point you don’t know yourself, INDEED YOU WILL BE FORCED INTO SELF DESTRUCTION THROUGH IGNORANCE, AS IT THE ONLY ‘RELIEF’ YOU THE CHILD WILL ALLOW YOU TO DO.
At this point you are in a ‘cage fight’ – YOU DESTROY THE ANXIETY OF ‘YOU THE CHILD’, OR IT DESTROYS YOU. SO BURN INTO YOUR MIND THE NO1 TRICK YOU THE CHILD PLAYS ON YOU – CHASING COMFORT FROM ANXIETY IS THE EXACT SAME AS CHASING ANXIETY IN A DIFFERENT FORM, YOU ARE DESTROYING YOUR SELF TO FEEL BETTER. All comfort is a sense of RELIEF, not pleasure, not fun, and RELIEF IS SIMPLY LESS/DIFFERENT ANXIETY, WHICH IS STILL ANXIETY. See it clear – by spending your life bouncing back and forth BY FETISHSIZING YOUR EXISTENCE as little more than a sequence of petty reliefs, YOU ARE ACTUALLY DOUBLING UP ON ANXIETY.
This is HOW YOU ARE CONTROLLED, and CONSCIOUS YOU must get to the point where you see this IN REALTIME, FAST…
SO LEARN TO COMFORT YOU THE CHILD WITH ELITISM, INSTEAD.
LEARN THE FELT THRILL OF BEING BETTER THAN THE TRASH THAT SURROUNDS YOU…
IT IS NOT FASCIST, IT IS ‘COMFORT REPLACEMENT THERAPY’ FOR BIG KIDS WITH ‘THE PLEASURE OF PERSONAL POWER’.
EMBRACE THIS CONCEPT NOW, FOR MOST ITS THE ONLY FUCKING WAY OUT OF LITTLE PERSONAL HELL OF ‘DOUBLING UP ON YOUR ANXIETY’ AS A WAY OF LIFE. When you do you will understand why I, why WE, why every celebrity, priest, genius, why all the beautiful folks of this world ARE THAT WAY – THEY CHASE THE FEELING OF ELITISM, NOT THE FACT, so don’t worry if your facts don’t match the feeling, FIND AWAY TO FEEL IT ANYWAY, MAKE YOURSELF BETTER THAN PERSONALLY, PUBLICALLY AND MAKE A POINT OF ENJOYING IT, NOT HIDING IT AND NOT NEEDING ANY EXTERNAL INTERACTION TO TRIGGER IT.
Then, soon, YOU ACTUALLY WILL BE BETTER THAN THE TRASH THAT SURROUNDS YOU, like ‘US’, as you will then start to ‘BE US’, instead of ‘them’, AND NOT BEING ‘THEM’ IS AN END IN ITSELF – TO USE THE FEELING OF ELITISM TO GROW UP, like you should of done as a child. This works even if it simply hold how GOOD YOU LOOK in your mind as a comfort ALL THE TIME, and how lowering yourself with the uglies IS A FELT SHAME that STOPS YOU. Work on it, STUDY THIS NEED, FIND WAYS TO DO IT, just REMEMBER IT MUST BE ‘PERSONAL and PUBLIC’, IMPLICIT IN YOUR BEING but there for all to see, so not money, not the power of position, not A REWARD FOR SLAVERY, that is a FAKE FEELING FOR ANIMALS. It MUST BE THERE ALL THE TIME, IT MUST BE PERMANENT, BUT YOU MUST TRAIN YOURSELF TO FEEL IT more and more, and not be distracted BY ANXIETY…
When you have MASTERED THIS FEELING OF ELITISM, when you LIVE THERE, then for the Gifted all the GROWING UP stuff gets much easier, AS YOU WILL WANT TO DO IT AS PART OF THAT SAME ‘FELT ELITISIM’, it becomes your ‘Cursus Honorum’. YOUR VERY OWN SUPERNATURAL EXISTENCE WILL REVEAL ITSELF TO YOU, AS PART OF ELITISM, as your old normal life will look like little more than a childs game YOU LOST IN THE PLAYGROUND, but got stuck in as an ADULT, reliving the same shit different day and calling it ‘a life’ – YOU WILL SEE YOU WERE STUCK IN YOUR ‘INFERIORITY COMPLEX OF FELT ANXIETY’. So you will understand JUST HOW DUMB AS FUCK you are right now, sitting there, reading this, LOOKING FOR A WAY TO FEEL A BIT CLEVERER, for a moment…
In the words of one highly GIFTED French woman – ‘what you are saying is I need to find a way TO SHINE all the time FOR ITS OWN SAKE AS A FELT POWER ABOUT SOMETHING I KNOW ABOUT MYSELF, even if that is just GOOD HAIR. But I don’t do anything, it JUST ‘IS’ BETTER BY EXISTING, like priests who USE VIRTUE AS ITS OWN REWARD’. That is SPOT ON, but, should you be GIFTED, you should find something YOU ALREADY DO INCORRECTLY, yet already provides the ‘opportunity for this feeling’, AS YOUR GIFT PROVIDES THIS FEELING NATURALLY, its just YOU THE CHILD WHO IS FUCKING IT UP BY PERVERTING IT. Once you have done this, THEN THE NEXT STEP – THE FEELING OF ‘BOTTLE’ – IS SIMPLY A NATURAL PROGRESSION THAT WILL, IN TIME, HAPPEN ALL BY ITSELF.
And then many of you won’t even need my help, as YOUR GIFT WILL HELP YOU with the rest of it, AND YOU THE ANXIOUS CHILD WILL SHRIVEL AND DIE – YOU MAY at some point then HAVE YOUR VERY OWN SINATRA LEVEL ‘MY WAY’ MOMENT, where you look at your old life and LAUGH AT THE BANAL STUPIDITY OF THE POINTLESS EXISTENCE OF A DOMESTICATED ANIMAL, unconsciously clinging on to its anxieties as just SOMETHING TO DO. Indeed, whether you are French or not (its actually a French song), you might want to stick it on next time you are alone and bored, as there does appear to be a little bit of magic in it, that may also work on you NOW, by setting the mental scene of your very own ‘COME BACK’ to the WORLD, against your current desire to HIDE LIKE A BITCH – YOU MAY SUDDENLY UNDERSTAND WHAT TO DO THINGS ‘MY WAY’ actually means, personally, as it may feel like you SITTING ON THE DEATHBED OF OLD YOU…
Then you will understand – SPIRITUALITY IS NOT ABOUT BEING GOOD, that is a childs judgement of a relative and temporary ‘side effect’, IT IS ABOUT ‘BEING BETTER’, and EVERYTHING that STOPS YOU ‘BEING BETTER’ is a ROOTED, for most, IN A FORM OF ‘SELF PITY’ that ‘OLD YOU THE CHILD’ simply does ‘NOT DESERVE’ – you have NO HONOR because you lie all the time. See, MENTAL ANXIETY ITSELF is mainly THE FEELING of SELF PITY, what happens when Inferiority meets Self Pity, that the majority of you have simply lost control of, because you have never GROWN UP. Not all of course, life shows the poor they are worthless at an early age, and the rich, ruling classes tend to have superiority beaten into them, but don’t feel too jealous of them, as they tend to suffer far more from the Anxiety of Comfort itself, via Hedonism, becoming way more extreme and self destructive in the process.
So the reason for this last little side bar is this – the SELF PITY of the middle classes is a ‘PATHETIC MENTAL PATTERN’, and should be cured as a priority by POURING LARGE QUANTITIES OF ‘FELT, GENUINE APPRECIATION’ ON IT, one of those super powerful emotions that works so well when you figure out it is a combination of ACCEPTANCE and GRATITUDE, as you would feel them – it quite literally dissolves your self-pity, much it can take a while. But when your energy weakness is such that the DESPERATION OF SELF-PITY generates almost constant daily anxiety in the moment, crippling your ability to see, think, do anything, THEN YOU MUST FORCE APPRECIATION OF ALL YOU HAVE TO REPLACE THAT, AS A DIFFERENT MINDSTATE – you must re-fetishize your life as a search for MORE APPRIECIATION rather than MORE COMFORT, first…
But THE GOLDEN KEY in doing this, YOU COULD SAY TO THE WHOLE PROCESS OF GETTING STARTED with the FELT DRUG of SUPERIORITY as you new mind-state, is when you come to realize that the SOURCE POINT OF THE FEELING OF BETTER THAN, of ALL ‘FELT SUPERIORITY’ is just a much practiced and believed version of that exact same APPREICIATION, JUST USED ON YOURSELF via YOUR ATTENTION, rather than on what you have = BEST DRUG IN THE WORLD. Just be warned, you will not get this right out of the box, you will feel it wrong, because you will struggle with finding the FEELING of ACCEPTANCE, so try harder – GRATITUDE IS EASY FOR MOST, BUT MANY ARE SO WEAK AND TENSE THAT THEY SIMPLY CANNOT ACCEPT ANYTHING AS ‘MEANT TO BE’, often because they are OLYMPIC level NARRCISISTS, lost in SELF-PITY and ADHD…
So be happy eh, feel a bit more clever now – at least you know why the folks from either very poor or very rich backgrounds find spirituality way easy than you do, as they have done for all ages gone by. JUST REMEMBER YOU MUST FEEL APPRECIATION, you cannot tell yourself you do, you must evoke the feeling, (or get a teacher you have a strong connection too make you feel it) as then you will be able, in time, to use it on anything, EVEN YOU.
Note that many of you will have a strong tendency toward COMPASSION as your HIGHER GIFTED EMOTION OF CHOICE as it is forced on you by visual stimulous rather than by conscious choice, so don’t get confused AS YOU NEVER USE COMPASSION FOR THIS – much as it is also a form of DEVOTION, of directed energy transference, IT IS THE WRONG WAY. As an example ‘I’ have COMPASSION FOR YOU, you APPRECIATE that in order to receive the benefits of it, TO LET IT IN. Compassion weakens you even more and must be avoided at an animal level, which is why the NATURALLY compassionate tend to go mad without help, way before anyone else, UNLESS THEY DEVELOP THEMSELVES.
Be very clear about this last point – COMPASSION FOR THE WRONG PEOPLE IN THE WRONG WAY IS DANGEROUS. In fact, the darker of the animal PARASITES tend to stumble upon the power of getting you to FEEL compassion for them early in life, get you to LISTEN TO THEIR TALE OF WOE, and all relationships with THEM tend to alternate, via the use of the OBLIGATION OF ‘ASSUMED’ AUTHORITY OVER YOU, to either cause you A HIGH LEVEL OF MENTAL SUFFERING or BEG FOR YOUR FORGIVENESS/PITY/HELP, which wears you down whilst making you feel in some sad little way SPECIAL.
But its all fake, all just a series of devices that they are using on you to drain the little life you have left FOR THIER BENEFIT, whilst laughing at you, even encouraging you to find new victims for them. These people are a cancer in your life, AND THEY WILL NEVER STOP UNLESS YOU STOP THEM, always check as the WORST tend to have a history of suicides in people they ‘used to know’, so make sure the next one is not YOU – COMPASSION CAN BE DEADLY, SO ALWAYS REJECT THE AUTHORITY OF PARASITES, FAST. If you don’t, YOU WILL HAVE TO BECOME LIKE THEM, in order to survive them, directly against your Gift SO YOU BECOME MENTALLY ILL – as a teacher you learn early to only ever use COMPASSION ON THOSE WHO DON’T WANT IT, as they need it the most.
HARDEN YOUR HEART AND KEEP YOUR QUALITY FOR YOUR OWN KIND, SO YOU GET BACK MORE THAN YOU GIVE, LEARN TO BE VICIOUS SO YOU CAN ACTUALLY BE NICE WHEN YOU CHOOSE – IF YOU CAN’T BE VICIOUS THEN YOU ‘HAVE’ TO BE NICE, DON’T YOU, SO ITS JUST BEING ‘CRAVEN’, WEAK = A WHORE. Just stop thinkin you need to be physically OR VERBALLY violent to be VICIOUS – YOU DON’T, YOU START BY JUST IGNORING SHIT YOU DON’T LIKE OR WANT, and then when you get a bit more confident YOU START TO LAUGH AT PEOPLE, SITUATIONS INSTEAD OF ‘GO ALONG WITH IT’, then USE THAT TO SAY ‘NO THANKS – I’M GOOD’. In this way you will have a way into what this post is about – ‘BOTTLE’, which in time will become PERSONAL HONOR, A SENSE OF SELF.
So just walk away – one of the nastiest tricks you the kid ever plays on you is to keep you TRAPPED IN A WORLD OF SMALL WORRIES, that will either never happen or NEED TO HAPPEN FOR YOUR GROWTH. THE WORLD IS FULL OF DISTURBED LITTLE CLEVER DICKHEADS, but when you know how to look they are easy to avoid or destroy, SO STICK TO APPRECIATION WHILST YOU LEARN HOW TO BE GIFTED, AND REJECT ALL USE OF COMPASSION, UNLESS IT IS YOUR OWN PRE-TEEN CHILDREN or A CAT (Sorry, but that is just too long a story for this post, just know that those medieval witches were right…).
Don’t get me wrong, COMPASSION IS A MASTER SPIRITUAL SKILL, ITS GREAT YOU ARE CAPABLE OF IT, just don’t let you the child USE IT AGAINST YOU – IT IS NOT AN END IT ITSELF, IT IS ‘A PROCESS’ – DO NOT USE IT TO DESTROY YOURSELF. YOU ARE ALL YOU HAVE, MIND YOURSELF FIRST, LAST AND FOREMOST, YOU WILL BE DEAD SOON AND MOST OF YOU WILL EVEN KNOW WHAT IT MEANS TO BE ‘ALIVE’. LET SHIT HAPPEN AND DEAL WITH IT, most of it is GOOD FOR YOU, but if you remain scared of your own shadow YOU WILL NEVER HAVE ‘THE CONSEQUENCE’ YOU NEED IN THIS LIFE TO ESCAPE SLAVERY, SUBSERVIENCE TO COMPLETE AND UTTER TOOLS YOU HAVE BEEN DUMB ENOUGH TO PLACE OVER YOU – FIND A BETTER AUTHORITY, ‘YOUR ELITISM’.
This is ‘HOW TO BE GIFTED’, 101 – BE RUTHLESS OR BE NOTHING, YOU ARE SCARED OF YOUR ‘OWN SHADOW’, YOU THE CHILD LURKING IN THE BACK OF YOU MIND, YET IT IS SIMPLY A SET OF LEARNED PATTERNS THAN NEVER WORKED AS A KID, AND THAT SURE AS HELL ARE NOT GOING TO WORK AS AN ADULT. If it helps at all then learn from the French Woman mentioned above – SAY, ‘WHAT WILL HAPPEN IF SHIT HAPPENS’, then look at that and caveat it away, PUT A PLAN IN PLACE FIRST to minimize its effect on you, DON’T TRY AND STOP IT HAPPENING – FACE IT, THEN YOU WILL GET MORE CONFIDENT, FAST. YOU MAY EVEN START TO ‘GO LOOKING FOR THE SHIT’, instead of looking for more ways to COMFORT YOURSELF BY PLEASING LITTLE FREAKS.
Good to go now? Great – so you SHOULD NOW KNOW THIS FOR CERTAIN, EH, SO DO YOU REMEMBER YET?
YOU HAVE THE UNCONSCIOUS, UNWANTED, UNHELPFUL ‘INFERIORITY COMPLEX’ OF A CHILD
INFERIORITY IS ANXIETY, SO YOU MUST REJECT ‘COMFORTING ANXIETY’ BY REPLACING ANXIETY
YOU MUST REPLACE RELIEVING ANXIETY WITH THE COMFORTS OF ELITISM, OF ‘YOUR SUPERIORITY’
SO YOU MUST USE THE COMFORT OF THE FELT APPRECIATION OF WHAT IS ‘BEST IN YOU’ TO START
USING THE COMFORTS OF ELITISM WILL MAKE YOU MORE ELITIST, AND SO MUCH LESS ANXIOUS
THEN YOU CAN MOVE ON TO ‘BOTTLE’, OF THE FELT ‘CONSTANT SUPERIORITY TO THIS MOMENT’
SEE TO GROW UP YOU NEED TO SEE ‘YOU THE CHILD’ AS THE ‘MOMENT OF ANXIETY’, THEN KILL IT
OR IT WILL TORTURE YOU TO DEATH, ONE FAILURE, ONE HUMILIATION, ONE RELIEF AT A TIME
So start now, pick some easy ‘fear of the future’ anxiety, some low level persistent thing like the childish dread on Sunday evening of going back to work on Monday, as it is much easier to notice, before moving on to more urgent, momentary stuff that is easier to miss before the reaction kicks in and you have lost it. Then ‘Let it Go’ in the moment by pouring some pre-practised level of Appreciation on it ABOUT SOMETHING ELSE, first for the BETTER THAN of what is around you, your stuff, then how you look, BEFORE MOVING ON TO WHAT IS BETTER IN YOU COMPARED TO OTHERS, ABOUT YOURSELF, PERSONALLY. In this way you will understand what to BECOME ‘BIGGER THAN’ YOUR ANXIETIES FEELS LIKE, BETTER THAN = BIGGER THAN THE ANXIETY IN THE MOMENT, SO ITS SEEMS MUCH SMALLER…
Just know that the first real milestone in doing this is when you understand what what ‘Letting Go’ of the need to ‘react to the anxiety now’ feels like, as then you will understand what to DISOWN YOUR REACTIONS AS UNIMPORTANT FEELS LIKE, whether you need to defend or attack something, someone, yourself for no reason other than YOUR OWN OPINION, which does not exist, it is simply a pattern reaction to DEFEND THE EGO OF A CHILD – this is how YOU SHUT ‘YOUR CHILDISH MIND’ UP, the first big step. You will then start to latch on to LOOKIN DOWN ON YOURSELF from a different part of CONSCIOUS YOU, as you now realize that your mind and your consciousness are completely separate, and that your out of control mindset of a child churns out endless PATTERNS OF OUT OF DATE BOLLOCKS.
The issue everyone has at the start is getting past feeling strong in your impulsive, childish reaction of ego defense AS A COMFORT FOR ANXIETY, BUT WHICH IS INCREDIBLY WEAK/PASSIVE, against feeling weak BY GOING AGAINST YOUR IMPULSE AND NOT ACTING OUT YOUR CHILDISH REACTION OF EGO DEFENSE, USING THE COMFORT OF ELITISM/APPRECIATION INSTEAD, WHICH IS INCREDIBLY STRONG/ACTIVE. The need to let go of CHILDISH EGO strength in order to actually GET STRONGER, BECOME BIGGER, SUPERIOR IS ALWAYS THE HARDEST BIT, and many animals can simply never do it, BUT ALL GIFTED CAN – THEY CAN USE THEIR WILLFUL SPIRIT AGAINST THEMSELVES, WHEN THEY REALIZE THEIR THOUGHTS ARE NOT ‘A YOU’, ITS A MEMORY MACHINE CHURNING OUT REACTIVE CRAP FROM LONG AGO AND FAR AWAY…
Learn ELITISM FAST, THE COMFORT OF IT as replacement therapy for the EMPTY, FAKE comforts of anxiety, aka instead of relieving anxiety with the pattern reactions of a child, CONSCIOUS YOU OVERPOWERS them – once you have learnt this stuff YOU WILL NEVER EVER GO BACK TO BEING A HARMLESS LITTLE KID, BECAUSE YOU UNDERSTAND THAT BEFORE YOUR ENTIRE LIFE CONSISTED OF DOUBLING UP ON THE ANXIETY OF A CHILD. There is simply no point in Yoga, in Self Help, in all the faux spiritual wokeness of the internet UNTIL YOU LEARN TO GROW UP – YOU ARE THEM, AND YOU WILL NEVER BE ANYTHING MORE THAN A DOMESTICATED ANIMAL BECAUSE YOU HAVE NO POWER TO SEE YOURSELF, NO MEANINGFUL LEVEL OF SELF-CONSCIOUSNESS.
TO END – A WARNING:
ALL YOUR CURRENT RELATIONSHIPS ARE BASED ON YOU BEING A CHILD, SO EXPECT THEM TO CHANGE WHEN YOU CHANGE…
BUT NOBODY AROUND YOU CURRENTLY WILL WANT YOU TO GROW UP, THEY WANT YOU TO GET WORSE, SO THEY FEEL BETTER
EVERYBODY YOU KNOW NEEDS TO KEEP YOU THE WAY YOU ARE FOR THEIR OWN BENEFIT, AKA YOUR SUFFERING
THEY WILL BE JEALOUS IF YOU ‘IMPROVE’, THEIR OWN SELF IMAGE OF WILL BE THREATENED, THEY BECOME ‘UNEASY’
SO YOU MUST QUIETLY SEPARATE YOURSELF FROM WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK OF YOU TO MAKE GROWING UP EASY
OTHERWISE YOU WILL LISTEN TO THEIR SELF SERVING BULLSHIT, AND THEY WILL STOP YOU, HARD… SEE GROWING UP IS ‘FIGHT CLUB’, AND YOU DON’T TALK ABOUT FIGHT CLUB TO ANIMALS, YOU DENY IT – SEE THERE IS NO NEED TO BE HONEST WITH ANIMALS, THEY WILL JUST USE IT AGAINST YOU, SO LIE. SEE CONSCIOUS LYING IS ONE OF THOSE GREAT LITTLE TRICKS THAT MAKES YOU MORE SELF CONSCIOUS, AND YOU NEED TO UNDERSTAND WHY THAT IS – ALL YOUR DAY TO DAY RELATIONSHIPS SUPPORT SOME PART OF ‘YOU THE CHILD’, THEY HELP MAINTAIN IT VIA YOUR PROJECTION OF IT ONTO THEM. CONSCIOUS LYING ALLOWS YOU TO PLAY A NEW ROLE IN THE MOMENT THAT IS DIFFERENT TO WHAT YOU WOULD NORMALLY DO, BECAUSE YOU ARE VERY FOCUSED ON WHAT YOU SAY MATCHING UP TO THAT ROLE, SO IT IS NOT INSTINCTIVE SPEECH – YOU HAVE TO BE SELF CONSCIOUS TO DO IT…
LEARNING TO PLAY A CONSISTENT ROLE WILL HELP YOU FIGHT YOU THE CHILD IN THE MOMENT, DEFEAT ITS ATTEMPTS TO STOP YOU CHANGING.
SEE, YOU EITHER PLAY THE ‘NEW ROLE’ OR YOU ACT OUT YOUR ‘NORMAL THOUGHTS’, SO IT VERY EASY TO SEE YOU THE KID ATTACK THAT ROLE.
THE TRICK IS NOT TO GIVE IN TO ‘STOPPING THE ROLE PLAY’ AND GO BACK TO BEING A KID VIA IT/THEM ‘INSISTING’ = CONSISTENCY.
PLAYING A ROLE, EVEN BADLY, BUILDS THE POWER OF CONSCIOUS YOU ‘TO ACT’ AGAINST IT/THEM, ALL 4TH WAYERS DO IT HARD.
THEN YOU SEE THAT ‘YOU THE KID’ IS JUST AN OLD ROLE, AND YOUR NEW ‘BETTER THAN’ ROLE BECOMES ‘CONSCIOUS YOU’.
IF YOU CAN GET GOOD AT THIS PROCESS, YOU WILL QUICKLY UNDERSTAND THAT ‘ALL THE WORLD IS A STAGE..’
AND THEN YOU GET MUCH SMARTER, BECAUSE YOU WILL START TO ‘SEE’ THE ‘TRUTH’, AS IT HAPPENS…
PLAYING A CONSCIOUS ROLE IS OFTEN ‘THE’ SUBSTANTIVE MECHANISM OF CHANGE FOR MODERN PEOPLE – ITS BUILDS THE POWER OF CONSCIOUS YOU TO OVERPOWER UNCONSCIOUS YOU THE KID. JUST DON’T CONCEPTUALIZE THIS TO YOURSELF AS ‘FAKING IT UNTL YOU MAKE IT’ – YOU ARE ALREADY TOTALLY FAKE, YOU ARE ‘NOT AUTHENTIC’, YOU THE KID IS JUST A COLLECTION OF FALSE INSTINCTS BURNT IN WHEN YOU WERE A KID. BUT YOU MUST COMMIT TO THIS NEW ROLE OF BETTER THAN IN YOU, NOT JUST WEAR IT LIKE A WORK ROLE, JOB ROLE, PARTNERSHIP ROLE, THIS ROLE IS WHO YOU WANT TO REPLACE ‘YOU THE POINTLESS LITTLE KID’ WITH, IT IS CHANGE ITSELF, AND THE POWER TO DO IT USUALLY COMES FROM USING THIS ROLE TO CHANGE YOUR EXTERNAL RELATIONSHIPS, THE WORST ONES THAT OBVIOUSLY ‘HURT YOU’ BUT WHICH YOU THE KID USES TO MAINTAIN ITSELF…
SEE HOWEVER MUCH YOU TRY AND CHANGE, YOU THE CHILD WILL USE THESE RELATIONSHIPS, THEIR ROLE IN ITS EXISTENCE TO FIGHT BACK AND STOP YOU IN MULTIPLE WAYS ASSOCIATED WITH HOW THE GROUPS OF CHILDISH PATTERNS, OF ALL YOU TEMPORARY LIKES AND DISLIKES ARE SET UP AS DIFFERENT LITTLE PERSONALITIES. THESE GROUPS COME AND GO THROUGHOUT THE DAY, THEY CYCLE THROUGH CONTROL OF YOUR THOUGHTS AS THEY ARE TRIGGERED BY EVENTS, WHICH IS WHY ‘YOU THE BIG KID CANNOT BE CONSISTENT’. SEE AT AN ANIMAL LEVEL OF BIG KID YOU ARE NOT ‘I’, YOU ARE ‘WE’, AND MOST OF THOSE ‘WEs’ DO NOT WANT TO CHANGE, SO WILL ‘CALL FOR EXTERNAL HELP’ TO STOP YOU…
YES, YOUR MULTIPLE ‘UNCONSCIOUS YOUs’ WILL STOP ‘CONSCIOUS YOU’ FROM CHANGING BY ATTACKING IT BOTH INTERNALLY, BUT MOST IMPORTANTLY EXTERNALLY BY CALLING FOR HELP IN WAYS THAT YOU DON’T EVEN SEE YOU ARE DOING, WHICH IS WHAT I CALL SELF SABOTAGE. YOU DO THIS ALL THE TIME EVEN IN DAILY LIFE AND CANNOT STOP ‘THE WEs’ YET, BUT YOU CAN STOP ‘THEM’ INTERFERRING WITH CHANGE – YOU CAN CUT THEM OUT, LIE TO THEM, DISAPPEAR FROM THAT PART OF YOUR OLD LIFE AS POLICY IF THEY EVEN REMOTELY THREATEN YOUR CHANGE. DON’T FEEL BAD, MOST OF IT IS ALREADY TOXIC, THEY ARE PART OF YOUR FALSE PERSONALITY OF NO CHARACTER, SO WILL GO ANYWAY WHEN YOU GET ‘BETTER THAN’…
THE TRICK OF COURSE IS TO HAVE A DOMINANT SENSE OF SELF AS ‘THE ROLE’, AN ‘I’, ALWAYS ACTIVE IN THE BACK OF YOUR MIND THAT CAN CATCH ALL THOSE LITTLE ‘WEs’ IN OTHER PEOPLE, SEE SOME ASPECT OF YOU THE KID IN THEM, THEIR ROLE IN YOUR LIFE, AND STOP THEM WHEN THEY TRY AND STOP YOU CHANGING – TO LEARN TO LAUGH AT YOUR OLD SELF IN ITS ATTEMPTS TO SABOTAGE YOU, AT THOSE OLD THOUGHT PATTERNS, INSTEAD OF GIVE INTO THEM. IT IS MUCH EASIER AT THE START TO SEE THAT IN YOUR RELATIONSHIPS, THE ONES THAT ARE THE MOST PARASITIC AND DESTRUCTIVE, AND THEN LOOK AT THAT GROUP OF PATTERNS IN YOURSELF AND SEE IT CLEAR – THE WORST OF THEM IS ALWAYS ASSOCIATED WITH YOUR CHOSEN FORM OF COMFORT, AND YOU CAN REPLACE COMFORT NOW, CAN’T YOU..?
ALL ASPECTS OF CHANGE, ANY CHANGE, ONLY WORK IF DON’T TELL OTHER PEOPLE WHAT YOU ARE DOING
GIFTED FOLKS HAVE TO LEARN TO NEVER REPEAT, NEVER EXPLAIN, NEVER APOLOGIZE/COMPLAIN TO OTHERS AS POLICY
SO DON’T TURN IMPORTANT THINGS INTO FRIVOLOUS ‘CONVERSATIONS’, IT IS THE DEATH OF THEM AND YOU
REMEMBER THIS, AS IT IS WHY THE MAJORITY OF YOU WILL FAIL – YOU TALK TO ANIMALS WAY TO MUCH…
This is the beginning of what folks like me call BIG PICTURE THINKING – to suffer the denial of your momentary reactions to get something MUCH BIGGER you have already decided you want later, WITHOUT THE USE OF FEAR. This works initially by simply HAVING THE BIG PICTURE of wanting BIG PICTURE THINKING, LATER, to develop the power you need to make this type of thinking work for you in the moment – YOU MUST PUSH YOURSELF TO PRACTICE, AS PUSHING YOURSELF EXPANDS YOUR ENERGY SYSTEM, AS THIS STUFF TAKES A LOT OF ENERGY, A LOT OF FOCUS.
Its not ROCKET SCIENCE, but just in case you don’t have ANY GOALS AT ALL, (if you are that big a kid all ‘your goals are momentary comforts’), THEN try this exercise – in 10 years your life will be OVER, even though still alive the vast majority of your options, your energy WILL BE GONE, SO THINK about what YOU WANT ‘personally’ 10 years from now, and then WHO YOU WILL NEED TO BE to achieve that, as a character. We call this HAVING ‘A POINT’, but for GIFTED it must always start with BEING FREE OF OBLIGATION, OF THE NEED TO WORK, to escape your slave society and consumer capitalism, both of which are forms of evil – YOU MUST BE ABLE TO MAINTAIN YOURSELF WITHOUT BEING DEPENDENT ON WORK, EVEN IF YOU ARE STILL DEPENDENT ON A POSITIVE RELATIONSHIP, YOU MUST ‘BE FREE TO DO AS YOUR WISH’.
If these are not your goals now THEN THEY FUCKING SHOULD BE – BURN THEM INTO YOUR MIND, THINK ABOUT THEM, YOU ONLY HAVE AN OCCUPATION YOU ENJOY, NOT AS A SLAVE, YOUR GOAL IN THIS LIFE IS TO BE ‘FREE TO LIVE IT’. Many thousands of folk on this planet achieve this goal EVERYDAY, so you can to – GET USED TO GOAL BASED THINKING, ABOUT DECIDING WHAT YOU WANT OUT OF THIS MOMENT INSTEAD OF REACTING TO IT LIKE A KID. Goals are a key part of CONTROLLING YOU THE CHILD IN THE MOMENT, and as such are a key part of the ‘CHARACTER ATTITUDE’ OF AN ADULT.
Most IMPORTANTLY, know that no matter what else that character YOU WILL NEED contains, IT WILL ALWAYS CONTAIN, FOR CERTAIN, TWO NEW TRAITS YOU CURRENTLY LACK – CONFIDENCE and RUTHLESSNESS, otherwise you will have no ability to deliver on ANY goal at all, except momentary comfort. YOU MUST START TO ‘STACK’ THESE NEW ATTTITUDES TOGETHER, GET THEM TO WORK TOGETHER, they will be your new ‘approach to life’ – AN ACTUAL CHARACTER THAT REASONS IN THE MOMENT, instead of just being an empty mess of reactive patterns you learnt in childhood, LIKE NOW.
To end this note, DO YOURSELF A FAVOUR, NOW – FORGIVE YOURSELF BEFORE YOU START TO CHANGE, AS IT WILL HELP YOU ACCEPT YOU WERE WRONG ALL ALONG. Nobody really gives a fuck anyway, so what does making a total mess of your life really matter – IT WAS YOUR UNCONSCIOUS ‘WEs’ THAT FUCKED UP YOUR LIFE, NOT YOU, DISOWN THEM NOW, DISOWN THE MOMENTARY NEEDS OF YOUR EGOIC PATTERNS AS JUST MEMORIES OF AN IMPERFECT PAST. CHOOSE TO PLAY A BETTER THAN ROLE, SO ONE DAY YOU CAN FIND OUT WHO THE FUCK YOU ACTUALLY ARE, BECAUSE YOU REALIZE YOU ALREADY KNOW HOW TO BE THAT PERSON, ‘REAL YOU’, AS IF BY ‘MAGIC’, now you have got rid of all this other COPING CRAP that was in the way…
Think of it like this – ALL GIFTED HAVE INHERITED AN AMAZING ‘HOUSE’, like some cliff side Villa on the Amalfi coast, full of gorgeous views, multiple levels of grand rooms, secret staircases down to the sea and up to the top of the mountain. No matter how long you live their you would never get used to how MAGICAL IT IS, that feeling of SPECIAL, OF NEW, OF UNIQUE WILL NEVER LEAVE YOU, SO YOU WANT TO SPEND MOST OF LIFE JUST EXPEREINCING IT, AS IT NEVER GETS ‘OLD’. That house is YOU, YOUR BIRTHRIGHT, WHERE YOU WERE BORN TO LIVE, but no one ever told you that, AS YOU THINK YOU ARE NORMAL…
See You the Child is chained up in THAT NORMAL, a dark, damp BASEMENT at the bottom of that house, unaware the rest of it is even there, so lost and alone that you cannot even see the walls, let the open doorway up behind you. All you have ever had for company is rats and spiders, who live in that basement in order to survive, that is all they can do, so you have had to make friends with some of them to stop going mad, AS YOU ARE STUCK THERE WITH ‘THEM’. But NOW YOU HAVE TO LEAVE THAT BASEMENT so THEY BEG/THREATEN YOU TO STAY, TO STAY BEING A CAPTIVE FOR ‘THIER SAKES’, AND STAYING WITH THEM ‘COMFORTS YOU’, makes you think you can go on coping with that existence AS IT FEELS SAFE. As the classic movie line goes, THEY need to realize that ‘YOU ARE NOT TRAPPED IN THERE WITH THEM, THEY ARE TRAPPED IN THEIR WITH YOU’, cause YOU ARE THE BOSS, and can leave anytime you like…
So don’t be surprised if you have to step on a few of them when you GET UP TO LEAVE, as YOU CANNOT TAKE THEM WITH YOU – don’t make the mistake of deciding to STAY FOR THEM, as YOU GET NOTHING OUT OF IT, as you will see when you get to the foot of the stairs leading upwards, when you start to SEE WHAT YOU CAN ACTUALLY DO IN THIS WORLD. So many Gifted choose the Comfort of Parasites AS A LIFE in this world, and in all truth we here on the 4th way understand that need, HENCE WHY I HAVE WRITTEN THIS POST TO BEAT THAT SHIT OUT OF YOU – LEARN WHO YOU ARE OR ACCEPT BEING FOOD FOR THE PARASITES that YOU THE CHILD HAS CREATED AS A LIFE.
Its your choice, but know its only an easy one when you ‘look back’, SO PLAY THE GIFTED ROLE, and START LOOKING BACK, NOW – THIS IS WHAT IT MEANS TO BE ‘RUTHLESS’, TO LOOK BACK AT NOW AS IF YOU ARE ALREADY WHERE YOU WANT TO BE, and so do what you would do then, RIGHT NOW. IGNORE THE FAKE REALITY OF YOU THE CHILD, of the ‘need to react in the moment’, its a delusion, some old opinions you copied off others long ago in order to fit in, that YOU NO LONGER NEED TO ACCEPT IN ORDER TO COMFORT YOURSELF THAT YOU ‘FIT IN’, because now you KNOW, so you really don’t want to fit in anymore…
UNLESS YOU LEARN TO LOOK BACK FROM ‘ALREADY CHANGED’, YOU WILL ALWAYS LOOK FORWARD FROM THE ‘NEED TO CHANGE’.
SEE YOU MUST NORMALISE THE CHANGE BEFORE YOU HAVE MADE IT, OTHERWISE YOU JUST NORMALISE ‘TRYING TO CHANGE’ = NO CHANGE.
TRYING TO CHANGE QUICKLY BECOMES A HABIT, A COMFORT, WHICH TURNS INTO THE ANXIETY OF REGRETTING THE FAILURE TO CHANGE, AGAIN.
SOME GIFTED FOLKS PEOPLE SPEND THE WHOLE 2ND HALF OF THIER LIVES ‘DECLINING INTO REGRET’, THE COMFORT OF ‘WANTING TO CHANGE’.
SO LEARN TO BE RUTHLESS, TO ‘LOOK BACK’ FROM A POSITION OF CHANGED, AND NORMALIZE IT, ACT IT OUT EVERYDAY OUT OF HABIT.
ASK YOURSELF RIGHT NOW – WHAT WOULD ‘I’ DO/WANT/FEEL/WEAR/BE RIGHT FUCKING NOW, GIVEN I HAD ALREADY CHANGED.
THEN YOU WILL UNDERSTAND WHAT PLAYING A BETTER THAN ROLE IS, BECAUSE YOU WILL LEARN BY ‘NEEDING TO DO IT’.
BUT FIRST YOU MUST MAKE THAT MENTAL JUMP ACROSS THE CHASM, AND TRY TO HANG ONTO THE OTHER ‘LEDGE’.
YOU MUST REMEMBER YOU HAVE CHANGED NOW, AND REMOVE EVERYTHING THAT TRIES TO DRAG YOU BACK.
YOU MUST DO IT BECAUSE ITS MORE FUN TO BE THAT THAN OLD YOU THE CHILD EVER WAS, NOT LESS…
YOU MUST FEEL THE ‘WIN OF CHANGE’, AND THE ‘SHAME OF NOT CHANGING’, IN ‘THE NOW’ OTHERWISE YOU ARE NEVER GOING TO TRY HARD ENOUGH TO DO IT, AND REGRET WILL BECOME THE ‘MORAL COMFORT’ FOR YET ANOTHER POINTLESS ‘ANXIETY’ – YOU ARE ‘GOOD’, YET YOU ACTUALLY GET WORSE.
SO YOU MUST BECOME ELITIST, YOU ‘MUST APPRECIATE’ YOUR ‘BETTER THAN’ AS THAT WIN.
BUT NOT BECAUSE IT IS GOOD, MORAL, DECENT, BUT BECAUSE ITS MORE FUN.
THIS IS HOW A CHILD WORKS, CHANGE MUST BE FUN, SO YOUR ‘BETTER THAN’ MUST BE FUN.
THEN YOU WILL SEE THAT WE TREAD THIS PATH FOR THE PURE THRILL OF IT, THE BEST DRUG IN THE WORLD.
BUT YOU LIVE YOUR ENTIRE LIFE TRYING TO COPE WITH PERSISTENT, LOW LEVEL TERROR, getting RELIEF via DISTRACTION.
So GIVEN THE CHOICE, WHICH WOULD YOU RATHER BE, EH – US OR THEM? So make the jump mentally – STOP COPING WITH YOUR CHILDLIKE MINDSET, STOP COPING WITH ‘ENERGY WEAKNESS’, STOP COPING WITH ‘YOUR ADHD’, AND ‘CHANGE IT’ INSTEAD.
DECIDE YOU WANT TO DISOWN YOUR OLD REACTIONS AND BE ‘BETTER THAN’ THAT, know that OVERTHINKING is an ADHD RESPONSE, EMOTIONAL EXHAUSTION is an ADHD RESPONSE, MENTAL FOG is an ADHD RESPONSE, ATTENION SEEKING is an ADHD RESPONSE, HYPERAGGRESSION is an ADHD RESPONSE, HYPERSEXUALITY-SEXUAL OBSSESSION IS an ADHD RESPONSE. NONE OF THESE THINGS ARE ‘YOU’, you are simply SUFFERING FROM THEM, so DECIDE TO ‘STOP SUFFERING’ FROM ‘THEM’, to STOP SUFFERING FROM ‘YOU THE CHILD’ IN ALL ITS FORMS. YOU THE CHILD IS A FORM OF ENCHANTMENT, LIKE A SPELL HAS BEEN CAST ON YOU AS A KID, so SEE IT THAT WAY, see that IT IS A FALSE, UNREAL STATE OF MIND, ITS TOTALLY UN-NATURAL – YOU ARE STUCK IN A ‘WITCHES GLAMOUR’, SO YOU MUST BREAK THAT ‘SPELL OVER YOU’, IN ALL ITS FORMS…
MAKE THE MENTAL JUMP TO ‘WANT TO CHANGE’ ‘WHO YOU ARE’ AS ‘HOW YOU REACT’, SO YOU CAN FINALLY ‘GROW UP’ – YOU THE CHILD GOES STALE IN LATER LIFE, GOES ROTTEN, GOES OFF, BECAUSE IT IS NOT MEANT TO BE THERE, CONTROLLING YOU. But ONCE YOU BECOME DIS-SATISFIED WITH YOUR REACTIONS, YOU WILL FIND THE NEED TO CHANGE IS ON-YOUR-MIND ALL THE TIME, so BEING RUTHLESS WILL START TO COME NATURALLY, INDEED IT WILL START TO BE ‘FUN’ – DO YOU REALLY WANT TO BE STUCK IN THE MOOD SWINGS OF A LONELY 13 Y/O GIRL FOREVER?
SO STOP COPING LIKE A CHILD, AND START CHANGING LIKE AN ADULT – YOU WILL UNDERSTAND WHAT ‘YOUR APPRECIATION’ OF YOUR BETTER THAN ‘DOES’ – IT ‘BREAKS THE SPELL’ OF YOUR ‘INFERIORITY COMPLEX’, and then YOU ARE ‘FREE’ TO BE WHATEVER YOU CHOOSE TO BE. STOP BEING A STATISTIC, STOP BEING PART OF THE HERD, STOP BEING CANNON FODDER, AND BE ‘YOURSELF’, AN INDIVIDUAL, THE ‘GIFTED QUALITY THAT IS YOUR BIRTHRIGHT’, INSTEAD – IT IS WAITING FOR YOU TO ‘SHOW UP’…
Still not enough..? Ahhhh – YOU NEED A ‘PERSONAL DIAGNOSIS’, you need to know what is ‘wrong with you’, so you can be defined by it, build a life around over coming some personal battle, make it all ‘ok’? So know, YOU THINK, FEEL, ACT LIKE A CHILD, that is WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU – YOU HAVE ‘UNRESOLVED’ TRAUMA, and however ACUTE, CHRONIC, or COMPLEX that CHILDHOOD TRAUMA ‘WAS’, IT IS YOUR REACTION TO IT THAT HAS DEFINED YOUR CHARACTER OF NO CHARACTER AS A SET OF ‘DOMINANT PATTERNS’. These PATTERNS HAVE NO POINT, they are a set of ways YOU TAUGHT YOURSELF TO REACT IN ORDER TO ‘COPE WITH THAT TRAUMA’, but now they are just a ‘hangover’ from a time long since passed, AS YOU STILL ‘USE THEM’, SO YOU STILL LIVE IN YOUR CHILDHOOD. See that TRAUMA DOES NOT MATTER, it is YOUR RESPONSE TO THAT TRAUMA THAT MATTERS, WHICH YOU STILL ACT OUT BECAUSE ‘YOU ARE UNRESOLVED’, still a big kid – YOU CAN’T SEE IT AS IT HAPPENS.
So SEE IT, see that there is no VALUE in those patterns NOW, there were produced by the reasoning of a child to DEFEND ITSELF FROM AN EMOTIONAL CRISIS THE BEST IT COULD AT THAT TIME. There is no reasoning BEHIND THEM, no rational process of thought that considers the situation and decides, THEY ARE IN NO WAY ANY BLOODY THING TO DO WITH THINKING. The key issue is that these PATTERNS FIX IN YOUR MOOD AUTOMATICALLY, which OVERWHELMS YOU IN THE MOMENT, particuarly if you have the ‘STIFF SHOULDER ISSUE’, (to ‘hunch up’ your body against expected emotional pain), so common in young girls. THIS FIXES YOUR INFERIRORITY COMPLEX IN PLACE, acts as an ‘anchor’ for it, SO YOU UNCONSCIOUSLY ‘FEEL WORTHLESS’ ALL THE TIME, THAT YOU HAVE ‘NO VALUE’, ‘NO RIGHT TO BE HAPPY’ AND JUST HAVE TO SUCK IT UP, so you become passive, lazy, obsessed with any ‘form of relief’.
THIS IS WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU, THIS IS WHAT TO BE A CHILD AS AN ADULT ‘IS’ – TO BE ‘UNRESOLVED’ – DO GET IT NOW? An Adult is STABLE, ADULT MOODS DON’T SWING WILDLY FROM FROM ONE STUPID THING TO ANOTHER, an adult decides their moods, chooses them actively BECAUSE THEY WANT TO BE IN THAT MOOD. But don’t focus on the TRAUMA, most of it was so small that it would seem pathetic now and even if it was a serious accident, attack or rejection, IT IS JUST A MEMORY NOW – it is YOUR PATTERNS OF REACTION TO IT that are AN ‘EVERYDAY’ FEATURE OF YOUR LIFE, that is why YOU HAVE A CHARACTER OF NO CHARACTER, A FAKE CHARACTER OF PATTERNS REACTIONS TO TRAUMA/RELIEF THAT YOU HAVE NOT CHOSEN – THAT IS WHY ‘YOU HAVE TO CHANGE IT’, most of you have no idea WHY YOU ARE LIKE THIS, because YOU are not like this, ‘IT’ IS.
See what happens with unresolved trauma is those DEFENSIVE PATTERNS ‘BECOME UNCONSCIOUS’, they are ‘always on alert’, so they start to look for it and then start to actually MAKE SIMILAR SITUATIONS HAPPEN, where no issues actually exist – THAT IS WHEN IT BECOMES ‘A FAKE CHARACTER TRAIT’. The more emotionally charged it was, the MORE POWERFUL THAT PATTERN BECOMES, GOING ON TO SPORN MULTIPLE ADDITIONAL PATTERNS THAT ALL WORK WITH IT, EMBEDDING IT DEEPER AND DEEPER INTO YOUR ‘FAKE NATURE’. An example – along time ago I had a series of negative and aggressive TRAUMAS HAPPEN TO BE AT A VERY YOUNG AGE, indeed on one occasion I briefly died, much as overall they were not that different to what happened to many kids in the culture I grew up in. In response to that EMOTIONAL PAIN I developed what is best described as a RED MIST TEMPER, which as a quiet, bookish kid before took a lot of effort on my part, BUT WHEN PERFECTED WAS EXTREMELY EFFECTIVE AT STOPPING THOSE NEGATIVE EXPEREINCES, once and for all.
Now, at the start it was ‘my choice’ to use it, to use that temper to defend myself, but that did not last long – within a year that TEMPER HAD BECOME ‘2ND NATURE’ TO ME, AND I NO LONGER CHOSE TO USE IT, IT HAPPENED WHEN IT WAS TRIGGERED. So I no longer used it to defend myself, IT used my temper to attack people where there may or may not be A CHANCE I WOULD BE ATTACKED, indeed I HAD TO USE IT IN CERTAIN SITUATIONS AS IT COMFORTED ME, MADE ME FEEL SAFE. In my mind I became much more successful at ‘my life’ because of this, IT WAS A SUPERPOWER, and I could do stuff I could not do before, LIKE HAVE MY OWN GANG AT SCHOOL rather than be part of someone elses. I felt BETTER THAN BEFORE, because I had never felt safe before, BUT NOW I DID, AND THAT MATTERED MORE THAN ANYTHING TO ME, ‘AT THAT TIME’ – IT WAS A RELIEF FROM ANXIETY, A COMFORT.
However, slowly but surely it became a HUGE ISSUE FOR MY FAMILY AND FRIENDS, as I became increasingly out of control, with many sub-patterns developing like baiting people to see if they we tough, or assaulting tougher folks who did not even know me as they threatened me by being like me. But much worse, those patterns INFECTED EVERY INTERACTION OF MY LIFE, even family, and over time became so automatic that I simply was not aware of being CHALLENGING, AWKWARD, UNPLEASANT ALL THE FUCKING TIME. In short I became a vicious, violent and volatile kid, ‘nasty’ was my 1st choice in all situations, and I LOVED IT. See I HAD ‘NORMALISED’ THOSE PATTERNS AS ‘THE ME’ I WANTED TO BE, but in reality I was a bookish, extremely clever and thoughtful kid who had already figured out at 12 y/o that the way to succeed in life was TO BE SMARTER THAN EVERYONE ELSE, and that the casual violence of the culture I came from was actually suicide – IT WAS A LOTTERY YOU WERE SURE TO LOSE, one day…
Now I’m sorry for the stereotypical nature of this example, plus I have paraphrased and left the worst of it out, but I use it BECAUSE I NEED TO MAKE A BIG POINT ABOUT FALSE PERSONALITY – YOU DO NOT REALIZE YOU HAVE ONE, EVEN IF YOU LOOK FOR IT IN YOUR MEMORY YOU CAN’T FIND IT, BECAUSE YOU ARE NOT CONSCIOUS WHEN FAKE YOU IS ‘IN CONTROL’. See, I am not trying to make any woe is me point to justify my exercise in harsh style of teaching, I could easily give 10 other examples of kids I knew who had it much worse than me, indeed to be badly beaten by a gang of older kids from a rival school was not even that uncommon – IT WAS MY OWN RITE OF PASSAGE AND WITH THE HELP OF OTHERS ULTIMATELY WORKED FOR ME, THAT WAS MY TRIGGER TO ‘GROW UP’. See I was lucky, I came from a ‘class system’ where it was clear to me even as a kid that I had to respond ‘actively’ to this trauma because of the ‘level of rank’ I was born into, indeed this type of challenge WAS SO COMMON I KNEW WHAT I HAD TO DO – learn to fight better than them.
The real point is THAT I DID NOT REALIZE THAT THE DEFENSIVE PATTERN I HAD ADOPTED HAD NOW INFECTED MY ENTIRE LIFE, I THOUGHT I WAS THE SAME GOOD, CLEVER KID FROM BEFORE WHO HAD JUST LEARNED HOW TO FIGHT, because that is how it felt to me – THE TOTAL BASTARD I HAD BECOME WAS ‘HIDDEN’ FROM ‘CONSCIOUS ME’, AS I WAS NOT CONSCIOUS AT THE TIME OF THOSE PATTERNS ACTING OUT. See all memory requires you to be consciously present to a greater or lesser degree, YOU CANNOT REMEMBER WHAT YOU CHILDISH PATTERNS DO BECAUSE YOU ARE NOT THERE when they do IT, SO YOU FORGET YOURSELF, AND LAPSE INTO THE FANTASY OF JUSTIFICATION OF WHY YOU DID IT AFTERWARDS, OR IN BAD CASES YOU ACTUALLY CONSCIOUSLY ‘BACK OUT’, AND HAVE NO MEMORY AT ALL.
Sidebar – if this BLACKOUT is you, and its so common it does not even bother you any more, THEN ‘PANIC’, as its an end stage sign, AND MEANS IT IS FAR WORSE THAN YOU KNOW, so you must use this PANIC as your PAIN POINT, BEFORE ONE DAY YOU WAKE UP DEAD. DO NOT UNDERESTIMATE PAIN POINTS IF YOU ARE ALREADY ‘TWISTED/TORTURED’, IE YOU EXHIBIT ONE OF THE MORE EXTREME ADHD RESPONSES LIKE SEX OR VIOLENCE OR BOTH, it is one of the few things that can still reach you, and the ENTIRE STYLE I write THIS IN IS MORE THAN JUST A CASUAL NOD IN THAT DIRECTION – it is meant to SHAME TEST YOU, so hate me if you like, ANYTHING IS BETTER THAN NOTHING. No need to go all ‘rolling in the deep’ about it – such a waste of energy and usually just a hideout for obsessively jealous parasites anyway – but you do need to understand THAT WITHOUT SOMETHING TO PULL YOU BACK FROM THE EXTREMES YOU HAVE GONE TO CASUALLY YOU ARE ALREADY ‘TOAST’. YOUR SELF DESTRUCTION HAS PASSED ITS EPISODIC START and now happens by itself, without you needing to do anything, SO ‘YOU NEED TO INTERVENE IN YOUR OWN LIFE STYLE’, which you the child sells to you as GLAMOROUS, EXCITING, SECRET, CAUSE YOU CAN’T SEE WHAT IT ACTUALLY HAPPENING ANYMORE, you the child has blinded you, DESTROYED YOUR MEMORY…
One of the biggest reasons that MODERN FOLKS LIKE YOU TOTALLY DISMISS THE FACT THAT THEY HAVE A NASTY, CHILDISH FAKE CHARACTER IS THAT THEY CAN’T REMEMBER DOING IT – THEY DON’T SEE THE IMPRESSION THEY ARE GIVING OFF, THEY JUST FEEL THE JUSTIFIED IN THE EGO DEFENSE AND ARE COMFORTED BY FEELING SAFER. THEY DON’T SEE THE ACTION, THE FACIAL EXPRESSIONS OR HEAR THIER WORDS, because they can’t REMEMBER THEM. So when an aged relative of mine sat me down and showed me what I was becoming BY LITERALLY RECOUNTING WHAT I HAD JUST DONE AND SAID TO PEOPLE I LOVED IT CAME AS A TOTAL SHOCK TO ME, and combined with the truth – I was becoming a TOTAL LIABILITY TO MY FAMILY – to the point that if I did not get a grip and realize that this was all a reaction to being half killed when I was younger and learn to control it then I would be kicked out of the house. So I learned to control it, and USE IT AS A CONSCIOUS PATTERN ONLY WHEN I WAS CERTAIN I NEED TO, as I still do today, BECAUSE I THEN REALIZED IT IS NOT ME, ITS A MECHCANICAL PATTERN REACTION TO DEAL WITH EXTREME CIRCUMSTANCES, and is NOT MY CHARACTER.
In my experience little practical insights like this are very effective at ‘hooking’ folks like you, so I’ll give you a few more in a moment, AS THAT MAY BE THE MOTIVATION YOU NEED IN ONE OR TWO OF THEM. Just KNOW THAT WHEN YOUR MEMORY STARTS TO FAIL YOU ALL THE TIME, that you cannot actually remember much of your day, IT IS BECAUSE YOU ARE SPENDING IT IN PATTERN REACTIONS, WHILST YOUR CONSCIOUSNESS IS OFF IN SOME FANTASY, OR DAY DREAM OF REALITY THAT IS NOT WHAT YOU ARE ACTUALLY DOING. This memory test stuff is so effective in extreme cases, eg most modern people, that many systems beginner stage growing up literally starts with the exercise of lying in bed last thing at night and trying to remember, in reverse your movements and interactions, WHILST MEASURING HOW MUCH OF YOUR DAY YOU CAN’T RECALL AT ALL, so your passed it UNCONSCIOUSLY. Combined with consciously playing a ROLE this stuff can work VERY QUICKLY IF YOU HAVE ANY LEVEL OF GIFT, as you realize what to be consciously asleep means FOR YOU.
So, before you get sensitive enough to how your inferiority complex works in the moment, before you can feel your childish pattern triggers IN ADVANCE OF THE YOUR COMFORTING PATTERN REACTION ACTING OUT, you need some tips to know what is CONSCIOUS THOUGHT and WHAT IS A PATTERN. These need to work in the moment rather than as a memory test later, much as the memory test will show WHERE YOUR PARTICULAR WORSE CASE PATTERNS ARE, so you can pin them down later – SEE THEM COMING BY KNOWING YOU CAN’T REMEMBER THESE SPECIFIC ACTIVITIES BEFORE YOU START. I with give you the classic 3 that the 4th way uses, sadly they will seem ‘moral’ to you so its important to understand that this is not being good, this is ABOUT ENERGY, more to the point your overall lack of energy and desire to waste the little you have on fantasy, RATHER THAN CONSCIOUS THOUGHT.
Know – Patterns all have specific overall characteristics in the moment, which are all to do with 1 simple fact, PATTERNS ARE FIXED, THEY DON’T CHANGE, THEY CAN ONLY DO WHAT THEY DO, LIKE A SIMPLE HAND CRANKED MACHINE. They are not ‘intelligent’, they are not entities that think logically much as they combine with other patterns in layered ways that make it look like they are thinking, in reality its all A to B to C, in the same sequence, over and over. This is why you think they are character traits, that they are ‘rational’ but they are just a set of mousetraps with simple triggers that then trap your train of thought into a set sequence, before producing the same style of reaction, BECAUSE THEY CAN’T DO ANYTHING NEW.
- Patterns don’t want you to CHANGE, BECAUSE THEY CAN’T CHANGE, so they work very hard to repeat themselves and STOP YOU DOING ANYTHING NEW, but they often fool you by feeling like they want to change, whilst actually keeping you stuck at the stage of ‘just wanting to’, and NEVER ACTUALLY STARTING TO CHANGE – PATTERNS CANNOT ‘TRY’ TO CHANGE, EVER.
- Patterns are VERY LOW ENERGY BECAUSE THEY CREATE THAT STATE IN YOU, patterns tire you out on purpose, BECAUSE YOU GO ALONG WITH THEM MUCH MORE EASILY, so PATTERNS CAN’T MAKE ‘BETTER THAN’ EFFORTS, patterns want you ‘to go through the motions’, whilst NOT WATCHING THEM, PATTERNS CAN’T TRY HARD, THEY ARE LAZY – PATTERNS SIMPLY CAN’T FOCUS ON TRYING TO DO THINGS ‘BETTER THAN’.
- Patterns are PASSIVE REACTIONS, they wait for something to happen SO YOU GET BORED WAITING, AND GET STUCK IN A SEARCH FOR A COMFORTING DESIRE, Patterns cannot do anything unless they have something to REACT TO, so PATTERNS INVENT DRAMA, FORCE YOU INTO SITUATIONS WHERE THEY CAN CONTROL YOU simply because YOU ARE BORED – PATTERNS WORK IN A SEQUENCE OF FAMILIAR EVENTS, OF CREATING THE SAME THING.
- Patterns are COMFORTING, THEY FEEL SAFE, so outside of your patterns you tend to feel DISCOMFORT, BECAUSE THEY DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO NEXT, YOU BECOME SLIGHTLY LOST AND CONFUSED, which forces you back to your patterns, AS THAT IS THE ONLY WAY YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO NEXT WITHOUT CONSCIOUSLY FORCING YOURSELF TO THINK ABOUT YOUR SITUATION – PATTERNS USE FEAR TO CONTROL YOU.
So you need to TRY AND MAKE ENERGETIC EFFORTS TO BE BETTER THAN TO CHANGE, whilst rejecting you boredom, your passivity, your laziness, AND ACCEPTING YOUR CONFUSION OF NOT KNOWING WHAT IS GOING TO HAPPEN NEXT. Confusion is one of the first key steps INTO CONSCIOUS THOUGHT, BECAUSE IT IS THE HAPPY ACCEPTANCE OF BEING CONFUSED THAT ACTS AS A KEY GATEWAY INTO CONSCIOUS THOUGHT – A MILESTONE YOU CAN START TO RECOGNIZE, BECAUSE YOU HAVE TO THINK BETTER THOUGHTS TO ESCAPE CONFUSION, JUST AS LONG AS YOU DON’T GO BACK TO WHAT YOU HAVE ALWAYS DONE BEFORE. Look at thinks differently, you must think NEW THOUGHTS TO THINK CONSCIOUSLY, while looking for the parts of your existing mindstate that are actually prepared to TRY, as they are the farthest from your patterns, SO YOU CAN RELY ON THEM BEING CONSISTENT MORE…
You cannot remove your patterns yet, BUT YOU CAN RECOGNIZE THEM AND CHOOSE DIFFERENTLY IF YOU PLAN THAT IN ADVANCE, you cannot change your pattern reaction sequence at the time UNLESS YOU HAVE ALREADY CREATED A DIFFERENT MENTAL OPTION VIA CONSCIOUS THOUGH BEFORE THAT – SO PLAN YOUR OPTIONS WHEN YOU ARE OVERCOME WITH ROUTINE, LAZINESS, BOREDOM, LOW ENERGY, FORGETFULNESS, CONFUSION, KNOW WHAT THEY ARE IN THE MOMENT OF SEEING THEM INYOURSELF = AN OPPORTUNITTY TO THINK AND SO CHANGE. Starting to see WHY WE TELL YOU TO BE RUTHLESS YET – EVERYTHING ABOVE IS SUMMED UP BY BEING RUTHLESS FOR SAKE OF BEING RUTHLESS WITH YOURSELF, BECAUSE IT IS BETTER THAN YOU PATTERNS…
SO START TO TRY AND THINK FOR YOURSELF BY UNDERSTANDING YOU NEED TO FIGHT YOUR EXISTING CHARACTER OF EMPTY, MECHANICAL PATTERNS, BY SIMPLY LEARNING ‘HOW TO DO THINGS CONSCIOUSLY’. These CHILDISH patterns make you forgetful by definition, THEY ARE NOT UNDER YOUR ‘CONSCIOUS CONTROL’, they are automatic and only act their own interest because they ONLY DO 1 THING, so you must actively step in and decide when and how you use them OR DECIDE TO STOP THEM WHEN THEY HAVE BEEN TRIGGERED. Your RELATIONSHIP WITH YOURSELF IS THE ONLY REAL RELATIONSHIP YOU EVER HAVE, EVERYTHING ELSE IS FILTERED THROUGH IT AND SO IT DEFINES YOUR WHOLE EXISTENCE – BEOME INTERESTED IN YOURSELF, HOW YOU WORK, THE ANSWER TO YOUR PROBLEMS IS NOT OUT IN THE WORLD, IT IS IN YOURSELF.
YOU ARE NOT YOUR CHILIDISH PATTERNS, BUT YOU RELY ON YOUR PATTERNS ‘TO CARRY YOUR THOUGHTS’, INSTEAD OF ‘THINKING YOUR THOUGHTS’ – LEARN THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A PATTERN REACTION AND AN ORIGINAL THOUGHT, LEARN HOW IT FEELS, PUT THE EFFORT INTO SEEING THINGS DIFFFERENTLY. YOUR PATTERNS ALWAYS CATERGORIZE EVERYTHING AS SIMILIAR TO SOMETHING ELSE SO THEN YOU ‘THINK’ YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO ‘FOR THE BEST’, EVEN THOUGH YOU DON’T, SO GET COMFY WITH NOT KNOWING WHAT TO DO – THE TRUTH IS YOU KNOW NEXT TO NOTHING ABOUT ANYTHING, SO YOU MIGHT AS WELL FACE IT…
SO START NOW TO CREATE ‘A BALANCE POINT’ IN YOUR MIND THAT IS IMMUNE TO THE COMPULSION OF YOUR PATTERNS, THAT IS OUTSIDE OF THE ‘CHAIN OF THOUGHT’ CREATED BY UNCONSCIOUS MEMORIES, THEN CALL IT YOUR ‘SELF-CONSCIOUS’ AS THE YOU ‘THAT WATCHES YOU’ – IT IS NOT PART OF YOUR MIND, IT USES YOUR MIND, YOUR BODY TO DO WHAT IT WANTS TO DO BY GIVING ‘CONSCIOUS ORDERS’ AS INSTRUCTIONS TO A BUNCH OF PRE-TEEN SCHOOL CHILDREN, SO START TO DO THIS NOW, USING DEFINITE, DIRECT AND FOCUSED SELF-TALK, IT IS ALL YOU THE CHILD WILL UNDERSTAND BECAUSE ‘YOU ARE ITS AUTHORITY’ NOW, NOT THE OTHERWAY ROUND, THE CRAP YOUR YOUR MIND CHURNS OUT IS NOT THE BOSS OF YOU ANYMORE, RIGHT NOW IT IS SIMPLY A HAND CRANKED SAUSAGE MACHINE.
AT THE START USE THAT PART OF YOU WHICH ALWAYS FEELS LIKE THE MOST ELITIST, THE MOST PERFECTIONIST BIT OF YOUR EXISTING PATTERNS TO HIDE IN AND PROTECT YOURSELF, SO START TO VALUE IT MORE THAN ANY OTHER PART OF YOU, IT MAY STILL BE THE PATTERNS OF A CHILD, BUT AT LEAST IT WANTS TO BE BETTER THAN. IT IS A ROLE YOU MUST DECIDE TO PLAY MORE AND MORE, YOU THE ELITIST, SO FIND SOMETHING SIMILIAR IN YOURSELF AND START – USE THIS CONSCIOUS YOU TO CREATE ORDERS AS ‘WORDS IN YOUR MIND’ TO BE ‘BETTER THAN’ IN ORDER TO COMMUNICATE WITH YOUR MIND. KNOW THIS YOU ‘TAKES NO SHIT’ FROM YOUR MIND IN RESPONSE – DON’T EXPECT AN INTELLIGENT ANSWER FROM PATTERNS OF ‘OPINION’, YOUR PATTERNS ARE DUMB AS FUCK, THEY HAVE NO IDEA WHY YOU THINK THEM AS THEY ARE SIMPLY COPIED OPINIONS AS STATEMENTS, MOST OF WHICH DON’T EVEN WORK TOGETHER AS YOU ADOPTED THEM IN ISOLATION, SO ARE JUST A JUMBLE OF CRAP.
AT THE START IT IS FINE TO PRACTICE ON ORDERING YOUR BODY AROUND THIS WAY, AS YOUR SELF CONSCIOUSNESS WILL BE VERY LOW, SO MAKE TIME TO MAKE A POINT OF GIVING DIRECTION TO YOUR BODY FOR A FEW MINUTES UNTIL IT BECOMES ‘2ND NATURE’ OVERTIME. TO DO THIS YOU MUST ALREADY BELIEVE YOU CAN DO WHAT YOU ARE TELLING YOURSELF TO DO EASILY, ‘IF YOU WANT TO’, BUT LATER YOU WIL DISCOVER THAT HIGHER LEVELS OF SELF CONSCIOUSNESS WILL ALLOW YOU TO DO THINGS YOU DID NOT BELIEVE YOU COULD DO, AND THEN THINGS YOU DID NOT BELIEVE THAT ANYBODY COULD DO. PRACTICE MAKES PERFECT, ALL GIFTED HAVE THIS ABILITY BUT IT WILL BE VERY RUSTY AS YOU HAVE PROBABLY NEVER USED IT. THE KEY IS TO TAKE NO SHIT BACK FROM YOUR PHYSICAL INSTINCTS OR FALSE INSTINCTS OF YOUR MIND, SO LEARN TO KEY LINE TO ADD TO THE COMMAND END – ‘… NO EXCUSES!’. GET USED TO TAKING NO CRAP FROM YOURSELF, GET USED TO BEING THE BOSS OF YOU, MAKE A POINT OF BEING VERY ‘RIGHT WING’ ABOUT IT, EVEN IF YOU ARE ‘SOFT/FRAGILE’ AS A PERSON – YOU MUST ‘OWN YOURSELF’ TO ‘CHANGE YOURSELF’.
YOU ARE YOUR ‘LOCAL GOD’ TALKING NOW, SO THIS YOU DOES NOT CARE WHAT YOU ‘USUALLY THINK’ BECAUSE YOUR MIND HAS NO IDEA WHAT YOU NEED TO DO ‘BIG PICTURE’ UNLESS YOU TELL IT, SO JUST WORKS TO PLEASE ITSELF BY ACTING OUT ANCIENT PATTERN REACTIONS AS AND WHEN THE TRIGGERS APPEAR, LIKE A BORED DOG LEFT AT HOME TOO LONG WHO THEN RUNS AROUND THE HOUSE JUST RIPPING SHIT UP TO NO PURPOSE AT ALL. STOP NAVEL GAZING, STOP TRYING TO THINK WITH PATTERNS, ITS POINTLESS, ‘THINK WITH CONSCIOUS ORDERS’ UNTIL YOU HAVE ENOUGH OF A RATIONAL CHARACTER THAT WILL ACTUALLY GIVE YOU DECENT, REASONED, ORIGINAL ANSWERS, NOT JUST THE CIRCULAR, COMFORTING CRAP OF A CHILD, WHO KNOWS FUCKING NOTHING AND SIMPLY DELUDES THEMSELVES WITH ‘OPINION’ AS FACT.
AS THE FIRST PART OF THIS CHANGE, AS THE TRAINING WHEELS FOR THE REST OF IT, GET USED TO RELATING TO YOURSELF IN A SELF CONSCIOUS WAY, THAT YOU ARE NOT ONLY NOT YOUR BODY, YOU ARE NOT YOUR THOUGHTS OR YOUR FEELINGS EITHER, THEY ARE SEPARATE TO YOU, AS YOU IS JUST YOUR SELF CONSCIOUSNESS. YOU ARE THE CAPTAIN OF A COMPLEX SHIP YOU HAVE MADE A GOOD JOB OF FUCKING UP OR IGNORING, SO YOU HAVE TO FIX THAT SHIP BY TAKING CONTROL OF IT. SO USE THE SELF CONSCIOUS TRICK OF STOPPING THINKING AND START DOING INSTEAD BY ‘GIVING YOUR MIND ORDERS’ ALL THE BLOODY TIME, DECIDING YOU DON’T WANT TO HEAR IT LOW QUALITY BULLSHIT – YOU DON’T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT THE OPINIONS OF A CHILD…
SO STOP COMFORTING YOURSELF FOR BEING SHIT, AND START ‘NOT BEING SHIT’… THESE ARE THE BASICS OF BEING GIFTED, SPIRITED, LEARN THEM AND THEN USE THEM TO GROW THE FUCK UP – GET YOUR ENERGY UP ENOUGH TO PLAY THE CONSCIOUS ROLE OF YOU THE GIFTED ‘ELITIST’ AS A FORCED ‘MODE CHANGE’. KNOW THAT ALL ROLES WORK BEST BY A STRONG FOCUS ON MANAGING ‘THE IMPRESSION YOU GIVE OFF’, THAT IS WHERE THE OTHER ROLES YOU HAVE CAME FROM, JOB ROLE, RELATIONSHIP ROLE, PARENTAL ROLE, AS YOU WERE NERVOUSLY SELF CONSCIOUS ENOUGH ONCE UPON A TIME TO BURN THAT ROLE IN. ROLES ARE NOT ESCAPIST FANTASIES WHERE YOU PRETEND TO BE SOME ONE ELSE LIKE A TWAT, ROLES ARE A BETTER VERSION OF YOU IN THE NOW YOU KNOW YOU NEED TO USE TO GET BY IN THIS SITUATION – FANTASIZE ABOUT THAT PERSON, NOT THE SHIT YOU WATCH ON SCREENS, YOU ARE THE HERO OF THIS STORY, NOT TAYLOR BLOODY SWIFT.
SO LOOK FOR THE ELITIST IN YOURSELF NOW OR IN YOUR PAST, THE STUFF YOU REMEMBER THAT WAS ‘BETTER THAN’ BECAUSE YOU WANTED TO BE BETTER THAN IN SOME WAY, WHICH YOU REMEMBER VERY CLEARLY, AND LATCH ON TO IT. CREATE THAT PERSON AS A ROLE, AS A MODE CHANGE, LIKE YOU ARE WALKING INTO JOB WHERE YOU HAVE TO BE DIFFERENT FROM HOW YOU ARE ‘AT HOME’, AS THE FUCKED UP LITTLE MESS YOU STILL THINK IS YOU. THEN PLAY THAT ROLE, ACT IT OUT, ‘LOOK BACK FROM IT’ AND DECIDE WHAT IT WOULD DO SELF CONSCIOUSLY, THEN DO IT. THEN YOU WILL LEARN HOW TO BE RUTHLESS, INDEED IN TIME YOU WILL WONDER WHY YOU EVER FUCKING BOTHERED BEING ANYTHING ELSE, AS ‘RUTHLESS IS NORMAL FOR YOU’ – YOU WILL SEE THAT RUTHLESS IS THE ‘THE CURE’ FOR BEING A ‘PEOPLE PLEASER’, HAVING A ‘BROKEN SPIRIT’, YOU NEED TO BE STALIN ON A BAD HAIR DAY, YOU NEED TO FIX THE SHIT THAT HAS BEEN ‘DONE TO YOU’…
PRACTICE BEING ‘MEAN’ IF YOU LIKE, JUST IN A CLASSY, WITTY WAY, SO CHANNEL YOUR ‘INNER OSCAR WILDE’, HOWEVER BASIC IT IS A SURE FIRE WAY OF KEEPING THE TRASH BACK ‘OFF YOU’, OUT OF YOUR SPACE, YOUR MIND. JUST REMEMBER, YOU ARE NOT ACTUALLY BEING MEAN, YOU ARE REPLACING YOUR INNER INFERIORITY COMPLEX WITH A SIMPLE SUPERIOR’ CHARACTER DEVICE, IT IS A SUPER BASIC TRICK BUT IT WORKS FAST, WE ALL DO IT CASUALLY, AND YOU WOULD BE AMAZED HOW MANY GIFTED USE IT NATURALLY OR WOULD DO IF THEY WERE BRAVE ENOUGH TO SAY IT OUT LOUD. SEE BEING MEAN AS A SIMPLE PROTECTION WILL DEVELOP ENOUGH SELF CONFIDENCE TO ENABLE ‘YOU’ TO TELL YOUR ADHD RESPONSES TO GO AND FUCK THEMSELVES FOR A CHANGE – YOU MAY EVEN STOP LIVING A LIFE OF CONSTANT EXHAUSTION INTERSPERSED WITH RIDICOLOUS ENERGY SPIKES THAT IS KEEPING YOU TRAPPED IN THE FEAR/DESIRE/BOREDOM CYCLE OF A CHILD. WHO KNEW, EH?
SEE THAT ROLE, THAT MODE CHANGE BECOMES ‘A NEW ATTITUDE’ TO LIFE OF ‘THE FUCK YOU’ TYPE, TO EVERYTHING LESS THAN YOU, THAT IS ONLY THERE AT ALL BECAUSE OF YOUR INFERIORITY COMPLEX – A NEW ‘FORM OF PROTECTION’ THAT DOES NOT NEED YOUR OLD COMFORTS OR RELIEFS, BECAUSE IT DOES NOT NEED COMFORTING AT ALL, IT FEELS JUST FINE THE WAY IT IS THANKS = A GROWN UP. JUST ‘REMEMBER’, YOU CAN ONLY DO NOW WHAT YOU REMEMBER NOW, YOU CAN ONLY BE THIS NEW ‘SENSE OF YOUR SELF’ IF YOU REMEMBER TO BE IT, SO BE ‘SELF CONSCIOUS’, SO YOU CAN ‘REMEMBER YOURSELF’ IN ORDER TO BE ‘MORE SELF CONSCIOUS’, IT IS ‘THE’ POSITIVE FEEDBACK LOOP OF BOTH GODS AND DEMONS – YOU MUST PLAY THIS NEW ROLE CONSCIOUSLY!.
Do you get it yet? None of this is hard or difficult to understand in itself, WHAT IS DIFFICULT IS DOING IT BECAUSE YOU WON’T HAVE THE ENERGY. So know what SAVING YOURSELF REALLY MEANS AT THE START IS ‘CONSERVING YOURSELF’, to stop the cycle of self destruction through CONSTANT ENERGY WASTE, LEAKAGE OF A CHILD. You must KEEP YOUR ENERGY FOR YOURSELF, SO LEARN TO KEEP THE TRASH OF YOUR INFERIORITY COMPLEX BACK OFF YOU, AND HENCE BUILD YOUR ENERGY BACK UP. The stress of relieving your ADHD COMPLEX just makes your ADHD COMPLEX WORSE, so you will NEVER ESCAPE YOUR DECLINE INTO NOTHINGNESS. ITS NOT MORAL, NOT GOOD, NOT DECENT, ITS AN ‘ENERGY EQUATION’, and it quietly dominates your entire life, you fool.
SO GET MEAN AND SAVE YOURSELF, for the accomplished Hedonists amongst you its probably the last available route you have, AS YOU ARE ALREADY SO BLOODY SCATTERED THAT EVEN REMEMBERING WHAT I WROTE 5SECS AGO WELL ENOUGH TO LINK IT TOGETHER IS A STRUGGLE. You MUST keep the SHIT OF THIS WORLD OFF YOU LONG ENOUGH TO LET THE CHANGE ‘TAKE ROOT IN YOU’, otherwise folks like me will never be able to save you from the trivial darkness of a child, NO MATTER HOW LONG WE SHOUT THE SAME BASIC ADVICE AT YOU IN THIS HIGH EMOTIONAL STYLE. By NOW SOME OF THESE CLEVER LITTLE PATTERNS REALLY SHOULD HAVE REACHED YOU ENOUGH FOR THE REALITY OF THIS TO ‘HIT’, as only your god is left to help you if they have not…
See, YOU LOST THIS GAME A LONG TIME AGO, YOU FUCKED IT UP like a big KID, BEST FACE IT, then FIX IT – TIME FLIES. I know you think this is nasty, this is vicious, this is ‘an attack on you’, THATS HOW I KNOW YOU ARE STILL A CHILD, with the judgement of a 10 day old bunny rabbit – THIS ‘IS’ AN ATTACK ON YOU, YOU THE CHILD, OBVIOUSLY, that is how you know what you the child is, what it thinks, what it feels, what it wants. SO GET PASSED THAT, THERE IS NO POINT IN ME PANDERING TO THE EGO DEFENSES OF A CHILD, you must get past ‘being a child’ IF YOU ARE EVER GOING TO GROW UP.
So understand that I’m probably the kindest bad man you will ever know, AS I HAVE JUST PAID YOU ALL THE HIGHEST HONOR of HELPING YOU as a courtesy for THE LEVEL YOU WERE BORN WITH, even though you have done to nothing deserve it, as YOU CURRENTLY SQUANDER your gift ON BEING ‘NOTHING’, because you are so very scared of me, of this challenge – YOU ARE SCARED SHITLESS OF ANYTHING THAT DOES NOT COMFORT YOU, you are a child who thinks if you just keep it together for another day then everything may yet work out ok WITHOUT YOU DOING A DAMN THING. Spoiler alert – it won’t, you have damned yourself via the ongoing process of energy weakness, you will never get the energy to change unless you stop energy weakness, kind of a QED moment really…
But no matter, go away and ‘titter’ in the corner, find something to feel clever about, ALL LOST AND LONE IN YOUR SECRETS AND LIES, TRY AND FIND SOME TWISTED LITTLE WAY TO WIN, so you can go on with your shit. Then one day, hopefully soon, YOU WILL REALIZE THIS IS NOT A COMPETITION WITH ME, IT IS A COMPETITION WITH YOU, I HAVE simply shown you this reality, LOWERED MYSELF and THIS DOWN ENOUGH SO CAN YOU CAN FEEL THE UNRELENTING SHAME OF WHAT YOU ALLOWED YOU THE CHILD TO DO to YOU, as then you will know you are GIFTED, ONCE AND FOR ALL – YOU ACTUALLY ARE ‘BETTER THAN’ THE JOKE YOU HAVE BECOME.
THEN LATER, YOU CAN REALIZE WHAT YOU SHOULD OF DONE, even though it is too late SIMPLY BECAUSE YOU COULD NOT PLAY A ROLE, LOOK BACK AT this NOW from the FUTURE YOU, and CHANGE. So, however many years in the future that is for you, know that I’m genuinely sorry I could not stop that disaster from happening to you, WHILST REMINDING YOURSELF THAT I TRIED, ONE LAST TIME.
To end this note now, do try and remember, WE ALL HAVE OUR STORIES, and no matter what level of trivial middle class hedonism you believe damns you forever, it does not, ONLY ENERGY WEAKNESS DAMNS YOU FOREVER. See even after I learnt how to GROW UP any level of spiritual achievement was still many years in the future, I spent oh so many years stumbling around in the darkness whilst making far more dramatic and scarier mistakes than you ever will because I was a BAD MAN, and worse I was really good at it. So read this post until you understand what the pity of good ‘bad men’ actually means – I HAVE LIT A CANDLE IN YOUR DARKNESS, so you can hopefully find a thread or 2 to follow and climb up and out of it, BECAUSE I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT WILL HAPPEN TO YOU IF YOU DON’T.
Nobody gives a fuck what you are now BECAUSE YOU ARE ‘BORING’, predictable, obvious, stupid, vacuous, all children are, IT IS WHAT IT IS, what it had to be to get you here, YOU HAVE NO DOUBT DONE THE BEST YOU COULD WITH WHAT YOU HAD TO START WITH. Just know however ‘amoral’ it sounds THE ONLY THING THAT really MATTERS IS THE ‘RANK’ YOU ARE CAPABLE OF, because if that LEVEL YOU WERE BORN WITH IS HIGH ENOUGH then YOU CAN FIGHT YOUR WAY OUT OF ALMOST ANY SITUATION, IF YOU TRY… I once did, many of us did, you can to babe, and I’ve made it much easier for you than most of us have it – SPIRITUALITY IS NOT ABOUT BEING GOOD, ITS ABOUT BEING ‘BETTER THAN’, AND EVEN YOUR CELEBRITIES, YOUR MEGA RICH KNOW THIS, as they already THINK YOU ARE JUST ONE MORE INSECT TO BE ‘MONETIZED’. TRY AND RELATE TO THE NOTHINGNESS OF THAT, if nothing else FEEL THE STUPIDITY OF IT.
SO NOW, RIGHT NOW, TRY AND RELAX THE BACK OF YOUR MIND AND SEE – if you are GIFTED AT ANY MEANINGFUL LEVEL YOU WILL ALREADY BE PRACTICING SOME TWISTED VERSION OF YOUR OWN JOURNEY, as some secret life of desire, some beautiful creative endeavor or tortured compassionate cause, SOME STAR OF YOUR ‘OWN SHOW’, ITS ALL PAR FOR THE COURSE, but you will never know what it is supposed to be until YOU GO YOUR OWN WAY AND GROW UP. And that always starts, INDEED IT CAN ONLY EVER START BY DEFINITION, when you STOP GIVING THE SMALLEST FUCK ABOUT WHAT THE ANIMALS THINK OF YOU – YOU LIVE IN A SOCIETY BASED ON THE LOWEST COMMON DOMINATOR, OF DOMESTICATED ANIMALS, OF SLAVERY, that is why you DON’T KNOW ANYTHING, so you must reject the herd, and return to the class systems that WERE ONCED USED TO SAVE FOLKS LIKE YOU FROM THEMSELVES.
START, MAKE THE FIRST STEP – REJECT THE ANIMAL AUTHORITIES OF THE HERD YOU CURRENTLY PLACE OVER YOURSELF in all their forms, THE ONES THAT DON’T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT GIFTED YOU, THAT EVEN DENY YOUR EXPEREINCE OF LIFE AS A FORM OF ILLNESS, AND ACCEPT THE AUTHORITY OF YOUR OWN KIND – KNOW WHAT YOU ARE ACTUALLY SUPPOSED TO BE DOING. Keep your powder dry and your mouth shut, by knowing YOU ARE NOT THEM, AND MUCH AS THE WORLD IS DESIGNED AROUND THEM, IT IS ACTUALLY RUN BY PEOPLE LIKE YOU. Just try not to wait until you have no choice, eh – ENERGY WEAKNESS at the level of desperation means development can only then be ‘done to you’ via SHOCKS, and modern folks can’t handle suffering at that level, as you are simply nowhere near BADASS enough…
Want something way easier to relate to, SOME MARKER FOR THAT CRUCIAL ‘PRE-DESPERATION’ PERIOD of your life? Sure, but there are too many different error cases against your individual type of gift, type of spirit, so I will give you the most generic one – some GIFTED PEOPLE DON’T GET OLD LIKE NORMAL PEOPLE, LIKE ANIMALS, they actually get better looking, stronger, sexier as they age, JUST SO LONG AS THEY STOP DESTROYING THEMSELVES AND FIND A DEVELOPMENT HOOK. If they don’t, their looks change RADICALLY AT CERTAIN POINTS, in some bad cases becoming quite monstrous, horrible, ‘possessed’ even, yet they don’t see it, they still think it is 30y ago. So what do you think now, if nothing else can your childish VANITY save you? Works for some…
Now get started or get lost, you have so much practical GROWING UP material to work with now I’d say a gifted 8 year old could probably do it, BUT CAN YOU – can you get past your own COMFORTS? You cannot go through your life as an UNRECONSTRUCTED BASTARD OR WHORE FOR REASONS YOU HAVE LONG SINCE FORGOTTEN, one of the saddest of all unschooled gifted stereotypes. See you have perverted the GIFTED INSTINCT to be a ‘star of your show’ into being an animal in a cage, where all the other children come to laugh, point and poke you with sticks to see what you’ll do like – ITS NOT A MOVIE SCREEN, its a FREAK SHOW down a BLIND ALLEY. TO BE STAR ONLY WORKS FOR YOUR ‘BETTER THAN’ IN PUBLIC, yet you are a little more than a PERFORMING ANIMAL IN A ZOO, ‘whipped form pillar to post’, and calling it ‘cool’.
SO YOU MUST DO BETTER THAN THAT, preferably before you go insane and the knackers van comes to take you away. NOBODY, ABSOLUTLEY NOBODY GIVES THE SMALEST FUCK WHAT YOUR UNRESOLVED TRAUMA OF A CHILD IS, not even you anymore, so WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU STILL CARRYING IT AROUND LIKE IT WAS YESTERDAY…? ANSWER – BECAUSE YOU ARE JUST A LITTLE KID IN A GROWNS UP BODY WHO HAS NO CHOICE BUT TO ACT OUT ITS DEFENSIVE PATTERNS AND CALL IT A CHARACTER OF NO-CHARACTER.
Do you understand why this is so unbelievably boring for us to watch yet, do you understand why you can’t even have an ADULT CONVERSATION WITHOUT YOUR PATTERN TRIGGERS KICKING IN TO FUCK IT UP, OVER AND OVER – DO YOU UNDERSTAND WHY NO ONE SERIOUS IS GOING TO BOTHER WITH YOU UNTIL YOU GROW UP AND MAKE A DECENT STAB OF ‘BEING GIFTED’? SEE THERE IS NO YOU YET WORTH BOTHERING WITH UNTIL ‘YOU RECONSTRUCT YOURSELF’, SO PICK SOMETHING IN THIS POST THAT INTERESTS YOUR INNNER ELITIST ENOUGH TO ‘TRY’ AND HAVE A FUCKING GO, EH. YOU ARE A GIFTED ADULT NOW, THIS IS NOT YOUR CHILDHOOD, YOU CAN DECIDE WHAT YOU THINK AND DO MOMENT TO MOMENT, SO YOUR CHOSEN AUTHORITIES SHOULD BENEFIT YOU – your ‘parents’ don’t control you anymore, so replace that biological need for the COMFORTS OF CONFORMITY with the comforts of ELITISM…
So get this through your thick, comfort seeking head once and for all:
GROWING UP IS NOT WHAT YOU THINK IT IS – GIVING UP COMFORT.
SEE THE ‘COMFORTS OF FAILURE’ ARE WHAT IS KEEPING YOU ‘TRAPPED IN FAILURE’.
LIVING AS A CHILD IS TO ACCEPT YOU HAVE ALREADY FAILED LIFE, SO COMFORT IS ALL THATS LEFT FOR YOU.
SEE LIVING AS A CHILD THE ‘THE HIGH POINT OF YOUR LIFE’, AT 16-18 Y/O, HAS ‘LONG SINCE PASSED’, YOU ARE OVER.
YOUR LIFE NOW IS ONE LONG DECLINE INTO MEDICORITY, ANXIETY AND REGRET, BUT THAT IS TOTALLY UN-NATURAL…
YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO HAVE NUMEROUS ADDITIONAL PEAKS IN ADULTHOOD, PEAKS OF ACHIEVEMENT, FREE FROM ANXIETY…
BUT YOU REFUSE TO TRY AND CHANGE LIKE A TWAT, AS YOU ARE LOCKED INTO THE BANAL, MOMENTARY NOTHINGNESS OF A KID
YOUR CHILDISH UNRESOLVED TRAUMA OWNS YOU BECAUSE YOU REFUSE TO RECONSTRUCT THE COMFORTS OF COPING WITH IT.
IS IT A #CRINGE, AN EMBARRASSING HUMILIATION, A CRIMINAL WASTE OF YOUR GIFT, YOUR POWER TO BE ‘BETTER THAN’.
SEE YOU HAVE BECOME A FREAK IN A ‘FREAK SHOW’, PERVERTED, SCARED AND LOST IN THE TRITE PAIN OF CONFUSION.
BUT NONE OF THIS IS YOUR FAULT, THIS IS WHAT YOUR SOCIETY WANTS YOU TO BE, AS THEY HAVE BANNED ‘CLASS’.
SO NO ONE IS BLAMING YOU FOR GOING SLIGHTLY MAD, YOU JUST THOUGHT THEIR SHIT WAS ALL THERE IS.
YES, THE AWFUL SHITBOX YOU HAVE MADE OF YOUR LIFE IS JUST ‘CAUSE YOU DID NOT KNOW BETTER – FACE THIS FACT, THEN GO OUT AND FIND THE CLASS SYSTEM YOU NEED TO USE TO GROW UP. BUT BE CLEAR:
DO NOT BLAME ‘YOURSELF’ FOR THE CHOICES YOU HAVE MADE AS A CHILD – MOMENTARY RECOGNITION OF FAILURE QUICKLY SKIPS INTO TRYING TO JUSTIFY WHY YOU WERE ACTUALLY RIGHT, EVEN WHEN YOU KNOW YOU ARE WRONG, THAT IS HOW ‘THE EGO DEFENCE’ OF A CHILD ‘WORKS’, HOW IT ‘TRAPS YOU IN CONTINUAL FAILURE’ BY TRYING TO ‘BE RIGHT’ ALL THE TIME.
THIS CHILDISH MINDSET FUCKS YOU BY FORCING YOU TO ‘DOUBLE DOWN ON FAILURE’ IN ORDER TO ‘COMFORT ITSELF’, INSTEAD OF SIMPLY RECOGNISING THEM AS ‘NOT YOU’, AS UNCONSCIOUS CHILDISH REACTIONS, AS UNRESOLVED TRAUMA RESPONES, AND THEN USING THEM AS PAIN POINTS IN ORDER TO CHANGE, SO YOU CAN FEEL MUCH BETTER LATER ABOUT NOT BEING A CHILD.
LEARNING TO FEEL THAT ‘TWINGE OF YOUR INFERIORITY COMPLEX’ JUST BEFORE THAT PATTERN REACTION OF JUSTIFICATION (IF IT DOES NOT MATTER TO YOUR EGO) OR DENIAL (IF IT DOES MATTER TO YOUR EGO) KICKS IN IS ONE OF THE MOST POWERFUL STEPS YOU CAN MAKE TOWARD GROWING UP AT THE START, AS MANY, MANY OTHER REALIZATIONS WILL FLOW FROM THAT.
SEE LEARNING TO RID YOURSELF OF THAT FALSE PRIDE OF YOUR FALSE CHARACTER, TO STOP TRYING TO CHANGE REALITY TO FIT IN WITH YOUR CHILDISH PATTERNS IS THE 1ST STEP TO REMOVING YOUR DELUSIONS, THE FANTASY WORLD YOU LIVE IN. BUT UNLIKE RELIGON THIS METHOD ALLOWS YOU TO GENERATE TRUE PRIDE IN YOUR ‘BETTER THAN’ ABILITY TO DO THAT = ELITISM.
YOUR DELUSIONS ARE WHAT TRULY FUCKS YOU – THE REINVENTION OF THE PAST AS FALSE MEMORIES OF ‘WINNING’ THAT CAUSE YOU TO MAKE THE SAME MISTAKES IN THE PRESENT, SIMPLY BECAUSE YOU CHASE THE SAME ‘COMFORT OF WINNING’. THIS IS DEATH, THE BEGINNING OF SELF DESTRUCTIVE ‘PERVERSION’ AS A CHOICE, AND A KNOWN PRE-CURSOR TO ‘SUICIDAL IDEATION’.
SO FORGIVE YOURSELF, BUT NOT FOR YOUR MISTAKES, FORGIVE YOURSELF FOR NOT KNOWING HOW TO GROW UP WHEN YOU SHOULD OF DONE, THEN BLAME YOUR SOCIETY FOR THAT IF YOU WISH, BUT COMFORT YOURSELF IN KNOWING THAT IT IS ‘NOT YOU’ WHO HAS FUCKED ALL THIS UP BY FINDING THE ACTUAL COMFORT OF ‘CHANGING WHO YOU ARE’, CONSCIOUSLY = ELITISM.
SEE, IF YOU DO NOT CHANGE WHO YOU ARE UNCONSCIOUSLY, THEN ALL THIS SHIT ACTUALLY IS YOUR FAULT, YOUR DELUSIONAL PERVERSIONS ARE YOU, SO YOU ARE ALREADY OVER, INCREASING ANXIETY, FAILURE AND DECLINE IS ALL THAT IS LEFT, A LIFE OF OF EMPTY AND INCREASINGLY DESPERATE COMFORTS THAT DON’T FUCKING WORK ANYMORE = ADDICTION TO BEING A CHILD.
FIX IT, FIX THE AWFUL, UNCONSCIOUS MESS OF YOU – PUT A STAKE IN THE GROUND AND CHANGE YOUR CHARACTER! RIGHT NOW YOU DON’T ACTUALLY HAVE A FUCKING CHARACTER ANY BLOODY WAY, SO WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO LOSE, EH BITCHES – HOWEVER A BIGGER ‘LOST SOUL’ YOU APPEAR TO BE, IN ESSENCE ALL UNSCHOOLED GIFTED ARE LOST SOULS, THAT IS WHERE YOU START…
So the next time your AUTHORITY comes to pat you on the head and throw some scraps through the bars of your cage THINK ABOUT HOW YOU COULD RIP ITS THROAT OUT AND ESCAPE. Then turn around and the look at the reality of that cage, see through the COMFORT OF SAFETY as just a compensation for BEING TOO SCARED TO GO OUTSIDE, so you finally understand THAT YOU HAVE NOT DECIDED TO LIVE THERE, YOU ARE TRAPPED IN THERE. Yet you could easily open the door and just walk out, now YOU KNOW HOW TO DO IT, cause I have told you HOW, and now YOU SHOULD ACTUALLY WANT TO.
Don’t wait for one of those children who laugh and poke at you to show some ‘kindness’, their kindness is self serving con, more of the same, AS IT IS FAR MORE FUN TO DEGRADE YOU – ALL CHILDREN ARE ‘SECRET SADISTS’ TO SOME DEGREE OR OTHER, so some become PARASITES, therefore never feel bad when you have to kill a few of them later. FOR SO MANY OF YOU, PARTICUARLY THE HIGHLY GIFTED AND HENCE ‘MOST VALUABLE’ AMONGST YOU WILL NEED TO KICK SOME ASS TO A GREATER AND LESSER DEGREE TO ESCAPE, AS YOUR CHOSEN AUTHORITY IS USUALLY THE SINGLE BIGGEST ISSUE – IT ACTIVELY THREATENS YOU TO STAY, AS I HAVE SEEN SEVERAL TIMES RECENTLY, AND IS THE MAIN REASON I HAVE ADDED THIS AUTHORS NOTE…
ACCEPT THE ‘US AND THEM’ APROACH TO LIFE, THEN CHANGE SIDES.
‘US’ IS THE ‘RANK’ OF ‘THE INDIVIDUAL’, ‘THEM’ IS THE RANK OF THE MOB, OF HERD ANIMALS.
UNDERSTAND THE POINT OF YOUR LIFE IS TO ‘BETTER YOURSELF’ = ‘THE PATH’ OF THE RUTHLESS.
RUTHLESS IS NOT EVIL, IT IS THE CLEAR REALIZATION THAT EITHER YOU WIN, OR THEY WIN, AS ANIMALS.
YOUR NATURAL BORN RANK IN THIS WORLD IS YOUR HIGHER LEVEL OF CONSCIOUSNESS THAT HAS ‘NEEDS’.
YOUR CHILD WILL HAVE REDUCED THIS TO JUST YOUR EMOTIONAL DEPTH, YOUR OVERWHELMING SENSITIVITY.
BUT NO MATTER HOW THAT FEELS NOW, YOU ARE NOT THE LOWEST COMMON DENOMINATOR, NOT FOOD FOR PARASITES.
SEE YOU THE CHILD ONLY HAS POWER IN THE MOMENT, AND THOSE MOMENTS PASS, WHILE YOUR GIFT SEES ALL, KNOWS ALL.
SO THE COMFORT OF YOUR GIFT WILL SAVE YOU, IF YOU LET IT, BECAUSE IT IS FAR LONGER, MORE POWERFUL THAN YOUR CHILD.
AND ONCE REAL YOU SEES YOU START, IT WILL TAKE OVER AND WORK FOR YOU AGAINST THEM URGENTLY, NATURALLY.
BUT UNTIL THAT CLASS, THAT CONFIDENCE IN YOUR SPIRIT COMES, YOU STILL MUST ‘TRY’ AND CHANGE.
YET TRYING IS EASY, SIMPLE, ONCE YOUR REALIZE IT IS THE GUIDED ‘EVOLUTION OF YOU’.
SO TRY AND CHANGE, ‘GROW UP’ – IT IS YOUR ‘ONE JOB’, ALL DAY, EVERY DAY, NOW…
SEE ALL CHANGE IS ‘URGENT’, ELSE THE URGENCY OF A CHILD WILL STOP YOU…
KNOW THE GREATEST ‘COMFORT REPLACEMENT’ AT THE START IS SIMPLY THE REMOVAL OF THE POWER OF OTHERS ‘OVER YOU’ IN YOUR DAY TO DAY ENVIROMENT, HENCE THE REMOVAL OF YOUR DAY TO DAY ‘INFERIORITY’ – THE CLASSIC FUCK YOU ATTITUDE OF ELITISM, OF THE INDIVIDUAL, AS A PROTECTION. SEE YOU DO NOT NEED TO BE MORE POWERFUL THAN THEM TO DO THAT, YOU JUST NEED TO ‘STOP CARING’ WHAT THEY THINK, WHAT THEY WANT, BECAUSE YOU ARE ‘BETTER THAN’ THEM – YOU MUST FEEL BETTER THAN, SUPERIOR, YOU MUST MAKE IT REAL FOR YOURSELF IN SOMEWAY, NOW.
WHATEVER DEVICE YOU USE, TRY TO GET THIS RIGHT FAST – YOUR BETTER THAN IS NOT ‘ANIMAL’, NOT MONEY, NOT ATTENTION, NOT DRUGS, THEY ARE INFERIOR AND WILL MAKE YOU FEEL EVEN WEAKER LATER AS THAT TENDS TO ‘ANIMAL ARROGANCE’. YOU SUPERIORITY MUST BE ‘SPIRITED’, YOU MUST FEEL IT IN YOURSELF WITHOUT EXTERNAL VALIDATION, AS THIS SUPERIORITY IS THE ROOT OF ALL CONFIDENCE, WHICH IS TO LOOK DOWN ON THE CHALLENGES OF THIS MOMENT AS A ‘SMALL, FUNNY THING’, WHICH TENDS TO GIFTED CLASS, REFINEMENT, ‘KINDNESS’. ONCE THIS ROLE STOPS BEING ‘PLAY’ AND BECOMES EMBEDDED IN CONSCIOUS YOU IT WILL FEEL LIKE ‘HOW YOU ROLL’, A FLOW STATE, YOUR MOJO OR SOME GEN Z CRAP, BUT YOU SHOULD START TO USE THE RIGHT WORDS NOW AS IT IS ‘A STATE OF GRACE’ DIRECTLY ASSOCIATED WITH ‘YOUR LEVEL’ – IT IS A RYTHM, A RESONACE.
NEVER FORGET WHY YOU ARE SUPERIOR TO CHILDISH ANIMALS, THAT YOUR LEVEL IS YOUR RANK IN THIS WORLD AS THAT IS WHAT YOUR ROLE WILL BECOME WHEN IT IS STRONG ENOUGH TO DOMNATE YOUR CHILD. SEE ALL GROWING UP IS INITIATED BY BREAKING THE ILLUSION OF ‘YOUR INFERIORITY’ AS A MINDSET, AS A TRAIN OF THOUGHT, SO USE THE FEELING OF ELITISM TO REPLACE MOMENTARY INFERIORITY, IN REALTIME. THIS ‘CHANGE OF HEART’ IS THE STAKE IN THE GROUND THAT ANCHORS EVERYTHING YOU MUST DO TO CHANGE YOUR CHARACTER AND DEVELOP THE BOTTLE, THE SENSE OF PERSONAL HONOR REQUIRED TO BE GIFTED.
JUST REMEMBER THAT SUPERIORITY IS NOT AN END IN ITSELF – THE BLESSING OF SUPERIORITY IS THE POWER TO CHOOSE, BUT THE CURSE OF INFERIORITY IS TO BE COMPELLED TO COMFORT YOURSELF WITH SECRET CLEVERNESS, A ‘TRAIN OF THOUGHT’ YOU ARE LOCKED INTO. YOU MUST USE YOUR NEW FOUND SENSE OF YOURSELF TO BREAK YOUR INFERIORITY COMPLEX, SO YOU THE CHILD LOSES ALL POWER OVER YOU, AS THAT IS THE ONLY MEANINGFUL PATH TO REAL CHANGE, OTHERWISE IT WILL BE CONSTANT FIGHT, LIKE AN OLD DRUG ADDICTION YOU STILL WANT, WHICH IS THE REASON YOU HAVE FAILED TO CHANGE SO MANY TIMES ALREADY, SIMPLY BECAUSE YOU DID NOT KNOW HOW TO…
When the FIRST BIG realization HITS (AND IT NEEDS TO HIT), that the ANIMALS DEGRADE YOU IN ORDER TO RAISE THEIR OWN RANK, when you FEEL THAT HAPPENING IN REALTIME, see how they are enjoying it way beyond any need to, that they GIVE YOU SHIT, BOSS YOU AROUND FOR A THRILL, please don’t go too ‘RAGE AT THE MACHINE’, as it can be quite shock – animals can all sense GIFTED RANK and it SCARES THEM. See a long time ago I used this SHOCKING realization, that it was not me the little kid who was targeted RANDOMLY by the hard boys from another school, THAT IT WAS MY RANK, BOTH OF WHO I WAS AND MY FAMILY that they were seeking to degrade in order to improve their own, TO MAKE THEMSELVES FEEL BETTER THAN, to feel GOOD about themselves AS THEY BECAME ADDICTED TO IT AT AN ANIMAL LEVEL. It was VERY personal, and they would only go after me even if I was in a crowd, which was one of the first things I tried…
So I used that REALIZATION as RAGE TO MAKE MYSELF UN-NATURALLY STRONG and even more RUTHLESS, which is fine, but don’t go on ‘howling at the moon’ – long after any need to defend myself was gone I personally victimized the ‘ringleader’ of that group for SEVERAL YEARS, IN ORDER TO ENSURE THAT WHATEVER ANIMAL RANK THEY STILL HAD WAS COMPLETELY DESTROYED. Taught me a lot about HUMAN NATURE, but was a HUGE WASTE OF ENERGY, and frankly kinda silly looking back – IT WAS ‘BENEATH ME’, and sadly, turns out that being a vicious psychopath is not actually a superpower. So get over the ‘fabled need’ for the ‘extended vengeance of the gifted’ OVER ‘deep emotional wounds’, fast – it is a classic sign of a strong gift in the unschooled, but it can seriously get in the way of the rest of this. See PERVERTING your GIFT feels REALLY GOOD TO ‘YOU THE CHILD’, and, AFTER SEX AND VIOLENCE, the 3rd most popular way to do IT is via AN INSANE LEVEL OF VENGEANCE, often combined with sex or violence, as it will feel amazing to GIFTED FOLKS – IT IS both SERIOUSLY ADDICTIVE AND SELF DESTRUCTIVE.
SO CHOOSE WISELY – PLAY THE BETTER THAN ROLE OF YOUR BRAND OF ELITISM, THEN LOOK BACK AT NOW AND BE RUTHLESS, THIS IS HOW YOU START. YOU MUST WORK OUT HOW TO PLAY THAT ROLE CORRECTLY FOR YOURSELF, HOW TO CHASE ‘EMOTIONAL CONNECTION AS PLAY’ IN THE PERFORMANCE OF THAT ROLE, RATHER THAN JUST ‘ACT FAKE’ AND ‘READ A SCRIPT’, BUT I’M SURE YOU CAN DO IT – THE TRICK IS TO UNDERSTAND ‘YOU’ MUST ‘FIND YOUR EXISTING GIFTED ELITIST’ IN YOURSELF FIRST, RATHER THAN LEARN IT LIKE ANOTHER FALSE, CHILDISH PATTERN, LIKE AN ANIMAL.
I HOPE YOU STILL HAVE ONE TO FIND, AS THIS IS ‘GROWING UP’ FOR THE ‘GIFTED’, NOT FORCED CHANGE FOR ANIMALS, sorry (not sorry). So play the role of the gifted, replace the mechanical role of the childish fuck up you don’t even know you are already playing – MANAGE THE IMPRESSIONS YOU ARE GIVING OFF MOMENT TO MOMENT, WHILST KNOWING YOU DON’T GIVE A FUCK WHAT OTHERS THINK OF YOU, SO USE ‘PLAY’ TO ‘LEARN’. Change your mode of being, CHANGE YOUR MINDSET IN THE MOMENT and direct your thoughts to remembering your sense of a ‘better self’, your point, and GIVING ORDERS TO YOURSELF. This is the different mindset you need TO GROW UP, your current uncontrolled thinking is all just forms fantasizing designed to distract you from what is actually happening anyway, SO IS DESIGNED TO TRICK YOU AS A COMFORT, which is the only reason you think everything is OK.
LASTY – Some time ago ago I asked that same Frenchwoman I use for examples what the greatest benefit to growing up was, for her, and the response really kinda nailed it, as she giggled and said, ‘I can find anything I want, I don’t even have to look! I’m conscious all the time now so I remember everything, I remember the point, so I remember to control myself and focus on what I want, NOW. When I was a child I did not have a point, I just accepted whatever my inner child, her chosen authorities gave me, PUT IN MY MIND, I did not see what they took away from me, and HATING ‘THAT HUMILIATION’ MADE IT SO MUCH EASIER TO SEE HER, THEN KILL HER – SHE WAS LIKE A CANCER. SHE MADE ME DRIFT THROUGH LIFE, NOW I WALK TOWARD MY GOAL IN THE MOMENT OF TAKING THAT STEP.’
THE GREATEST CURSE OF BEING A CHILD IS NOT ANXIETY, IT IS THAT ‘YOU FORGET’, which is what causes constant anxiety. The greatest spur for the URGENCY TO CHANGE is SUFFERING, so to realize YOU ‘SUFFER FROM YOUR COMFORTS’ is the greatest realization. So ‘PERSONIFY’ YOU THE BIG KID HIDING IN YOUR UNCONSCIOUS AS ‘NOT YOU’, and start to watch that BITCH, as she fucking hates REAL YOU, so loves your total humiliation, YOUR FAILURE TO DO ANYTHING BUT WHAT SHE WANTS, LIKE AN EVIL LITTLE SADIST.
See when I asked that same woman WHAT WAS THE TRIGGER TO MAKE GROWING UP URGENT FOR HER, she, rather sheepishly said this – ‘because one day I saw my inner child act out in real time, I SAW MY DOMINAT COMPLEX, MY TRAUMA RESPONSES, like you had said AND IT WAS SOOOOO UNBELIEVABLY BORING I ACTUALLY LAUGHED OUT LOUD’. After a little encouragment she then told me what it was, which may help you, AS IN MY EXPEREINCE IT IS THE MOST POPULAR DOMINAT COMPLEX OF ALL ‘modern’ GIFTED HEDONISTS, if not the only one, SO YOU MAY HAVE YOUR VERSION OF THIS TOO. However banal and boring this is do pay attention, as YOU MAY ALSO BE THIS FUCKING DUMB (Sorry, hun…).
‘Ok, sorry this is not more interesting – I had an idyllic childhood, brought up rich and pretty, BUT MY PARENTS FOUGHT ALL THE TIME, argued as a way of life, petty and controlling, as IT WAS NORMAL, ACCEPTABLE. I did not realize it had given me the shadow of ‘the Saviour’ complex – that my mission was to be BAD WHILST WAITING FOR SOMEONE TO TO BE STRONG ENOUGH TO COME AND SAVE ME. My brother has the opposite, he tries to be strong to save others, so willing chases after HORRIBLE WOMEN, before realizing he does not want them NOW he has saved them, or they are so fucked up then they are not worth saving in the first place and now he is stuck with them. Through that impulse control exercise you gave me (4th way Stopping Game) I was able to see that act out, that ‘my badness was a performance’ meant to attract GOOD PEOPLE, but had become an end in itself, so I always just wanted to be BAD whilst ‘hoping’ to be saved, NOT ACTUALLY SAVED, it was all mechanical REACTION, THERE WAS NO THOUGHT BEHIND IT.’
‘Then it was easy, THEN I REALIZED THAT THE ONLY PERSON I WOULD ALLOW TO SAVE ME WAS ME, because I realized I did not need saving, I JUST NEEDED TO GROW UP… I guess that is when my GIFT kicked in, because everything changed after that, I CHANGED KINDA overnight, MAINLY BECAUSE I WAS JUST TOO EMBARRASSED TO BE OLD ME ANYMORE as I now REMEMBERED WHAT SHE WAS, ALL THE TIME, SO I COULD NOT DO IT ANYMORE. I REALLY HATED HER, what see had done to me, my reputation, my money, my freedom, MY NATURAL CLASS, MY CREATIVITY. 8 of the best years of my life LOST in a meaningless haze, whilst I ruined anything good about me, pretending to be 17y/o everyday, LIKE A DRAMA QUEEN, who could not accept that I was now OLDER, SO I HAD TO CLING ON TO SOME FANTASY OF THE PAST THAT DID NOT EVEN EXIST THEN, make it even better, wilder, scarier, more perverted, pretending I was full of life, whilst actually being FULL OF DEATH. I was unable to move on, so doubling down on everything ‘I was not’ anymore, JUST IN CASE ‘I DISAPPEARED’ ONE DAY, and no one ever looked at me with desire again (? French thing…)…
Everything was her, her friends, her job, her likes and dislikes, her safety men, yet I don’t even remember 10% as I was not there, she turned me into one more coke whore amongst thousands in this city, bitch even made me UGLY, fat, as the muscles on one side of my face collapsed which cost a fortune to fix – I was NOTHING because she wanted me to be NOTHING, TO DESTROY ME, she even ‘made me want to dress’ like an out of work stripper, stopped me even washing myself properly. So I killed her, and all traces of her in my life, BEFORE SHE KILLED ME, now I am FREE to do what I wish.
AND I HAVE NEVER BEEN HAPPIER, before I did not even know what the word happy meant, cause I thought it meant RELIEF, BUT IT ACTUALLY MEANS A SENSE OF ‘POWER IN THE MOMENT’, what you call agency, BOTTLE – to know as a constant ‘sense of self’ I can cope with whatever happens NEXT, even though I don’t know how to before I start, still I know it will be a ‘small thing’… Life is easy now, because other than you and the others of my own kind that make up my circle you taught us to develop, I don’t give a damn, MUCH AS IT HELPS TO BE RICH AND POWERFUL AGAIN’ (Wide eyes and then Big Smile, amazing…). Always makes me laugh that over 2/3rds of all GOOD students have either very rich or very poor backgrounds, yet they make up a tiny percentage of your society – the aspirational middle classes are doomed by the ego safety and emotional poverty of their childhoods….
Classy bitch, eh, so maybe work on your IMPULSE CONTROL if you need a simple task as a way into this, what you should of been taught as a kid, then maybe you will see the same hateful little mess of ‘you the kid’ that we see – USE IT TO START AND PLAY THE ROLE, TO ‘GAME IT’. See however distasteful I find the need to give you this level of practical advice I accept you were probably not born into a class system, so your big kid is much stronger than you, and the only patterns you have to enable change will be the ones that everyone is born with – ‘TO CHANGE AS PLAY’. Otherwise you will need to be FORCED, SHOCKED INTO IT, and no one is goin to waste that kind of energy on you until they can see you TRY – what you think is class is pretend class, class as PR, as celebrity and money are great servants but shit masters…
SEE, THE GREATEST CURSE OF YOUR SAVIOUR COMPLEX IS THE FACT THAT YOU ACTUALLY REPELL WHAT YOU ARE HOPING FOR – you the child is doomed, no one is coming to save you, no one gives a shit about you unless YOU GIVE A SHIT ABOUT YOU. But you just want comfort, safety, boredom, CLEVERNESS, SECRETS and MORE ANXIETY, BECAUSE THAT IS ALL YOU THE CHILD, INDEED ANY CHILD IS CAPABLE OF – YOU HAVE THE MINDSET OF A ‘LOWER LIFEFORM’. GET IT NOW – YOU ARE A MAY FLY, YOU ARE NOTHING, SO YOU SUFFER FROM THAT NOTHINGNESS, IT IS ALL YOU CAN CONCEPTUALIZE, UNLESS YOU GROW UP. IT IS NOT A MORAL JUDGEMENT OF YOUR CHARACTER, YOU HAVE NO CHARACTER, IT IS A JUDGEMENT OF ‘YOUR LEVEL’.
THIS IS THE 4TH WAY, EVERYONE WANTS YOU TO SUCCEED IF YOU HAVE THE POWER TO DO IT – IT IS YOUR BIRTHRIGHT, AND THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS IN YOUR LIFE. NOBODY CARES WHAT YOU ARE NOW AS A CHILD, NO ONE CARES ABOUT YOU AS A PERSONALITY – YOU ARE NOTHING AS A CHILD, NO GENUINE OPINIONS, LIKES AND DISLIKES, GOALS OR REASONS TO EXIST, ALL IS FAKE, COPIED, MADE UP. SO YOU MUST FIND AWAY TO DECIDE TO START YOURSELF, AND TEST YOURSELF BY PASSING THE TESTS YOUR GIFT HAS SET YOU, INSTEAD OF FAILING THEM, FOLLOWING THIS GUIDANCE, ACCEPTNG MY AUTHORITY OVER YOUR CHILDS.
UNDERSTAND THIS IS THE REASON WE TOLERATE YOUR TEDIOUS BADNESS, NOTHING YOU SAY IS WORTH LISTENING TO UNTIL YOU GROW UP, YOU ARE ‘SIMPLE MINDED’, UN-SOPHISTICATED, UN-AWARE, ONE MORE CLEVER WHORE AMONGST MILLIONS OF OTHERS, A COW IN A FIELD ACTING OUT YOUR PROGRAMMING, A DOMESTICATED ANIMAL GOING THROUGH THE MOTIONS UNTIL YOU DIE AND ARE REPLACED WITH AN EXACT COPY. WHAT YOU HAVE DONE AS A CHILD IN A CHILDISH MINDSET DOES-NOT-MATTER…
BUT UNLESS YOU BREAK OUT OF THE CONTINOUS CYCLE OF MENTAL MOMENTS, FOREVER OVERWHELMING THE LAST THOUGHT IN QUICK SUCCESSION, YOU WILL NEVER SAVE THE ENERGY YOU NEED FOR SELF CONSCIOUSNESS. YOU WILL NEVER BE ABLE TO FOCUS ON ONE THOUGHT AS A CHOICE, AND THINK CORRECTLY BY NOT CONTINOUSLY FOLLOWING AND THEN ‘LOSING’ YOUR TRAIN OF THOUGHT WITH RANDOM SIDE TRACKS WHICH YOU THINK ARE THE SAME TRAIN BUT ARE ACTUALLY A PERVERSION OF THOSE THOUGHTS BY YOUR CHILDISH PATTERNS. YOU MUST LEARN TO RELAX YOUR MIND SO IT DOES NOT OVERPOWER YOU ALL THE TIME WITH RANDOM CRAP IN QUICK SUCCESSION, SO YOU HAVE WHAT THE 4TH WAY CALLS ‘LONG THOUGHTS’.
THEN YOU CAN HAVE A PERMANENT ‘SENSE OF YOUR SELF’, THE MOST IMPORTANT OF THOSE THOUGHTS, WHICH ANCHORS YOU INTO THE NOW OF WHAT YOU WANT, AS WHO YOU ARE, EVEN IF THAT IS JUST A LIST OF DOES AND DON’T AT THE START – IT IS A TRIP HAZARD FOR YOU THE CHILD TO BE JUDGED AGAINST IN THE MOMENT. SO NOW YOU WON’T BE CONSTANTLY OVERWELMED BY THE MOMENTARY NEEDS OF YOUR PATTERNS, ONE OF A NEVER ENDING CONSTANT SEQUENCE OF LITTLE MOOD SWINGS LIKE AN OBVIOUS, TRIVIAL LITTLE GIRL, STUCK IN ‘ATTENTION SEEKING SLUT’ MODE – YOUR MOODS CONTINUALLY CYCLE WITH YOUR THOUGHTS, WITH NO IDEA WHAT IS COMING NEXT, SO NO IDEA WHO YOU ARE AT THAT MOMENT = NO-THING.
YES, WE PITY YOU, AND HOPE YOU CAN GROW UP, SOON, AS RIGHT NOW YOU ARE NOT WORTH A 2ND GLANCE – YOU DON’T REALIZE YOU ARE SLUG, YOU DON’T WANT TO BE A SLUG, YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW WHAT A SLUG IS, OR WHAT NOT BEING A SLUG IS, BUT YOU HAVE TO FIND AWAY TO SUSPEND YOU OWN LOW QUALITY B/S AND TRY NOT TO BE SLUG IN ORDER TO GROW UP.
FIND SOMETHING IN YOU NOW THAT IS ‘BETTER THAN’ ALREADY AND LATCH ONTO THAT, THEN REALIZE YOU DON’T KNOW SHIT AND WHATEVER CLEVER SHIT YOU DO THINK IS JUST THE SAME OLD SELF DESTRUCTIVE SHIT FROM BEFORE – YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW HOW TO THINK, LET ALONE TALK. YOU HAVE NOT FOUND YOUR VOICE SO YOU ARE NOT CONFIDENT TO SPEAK SELF CONSCIOUSLY, CAN NEVER SAY WHAT YOU MEAN, AND YOU JUST TALK IN THE AUTO COMFORTING PATTERNS OF A 13Y/O, LIKE BIRD CALLS IN THE JUNGLE. I HAVE TO CONSTANTLY COMPENSATE FOR YOU HAVING THE MENTAL ACCUITY OF A SEWER RAT, LOST IN YOUR DOG WHISTLES, YOUR TEEN SPEAK, YOUR HOOK CODES LIKE THE MOST BASIC OF ALL BASIC BITCHES – YOU ARE JUST SO BLOODY CLEVER BECAUSE YOU ARE SOOOOO BLOODY WEAK YOU WOULD NEED TO THREATHEN SELF HARM WITHOUT THAT CLEVERNESS…
DO YOU SEE THE PROBLEM NOW, DO YOU SEE ‘OUR FAILURE TO COMMUNICATE’ – YOU HAVE THE COMMUNICATION SKILLS OF A BUDGIE, YOU DON’T LISTEN TO UNDERSTAND, YOU DON’T THINK ABOUT WHAT IS BEING SAID TO YOU FOR A MOMENT BEFORE RESPONDING, YOU LISTEN IN ORDER TO DEFEND YOURSELF WITH THE MEMORIES OF A SCHOOLGIRL. YOU WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND YOURSELF THAT WAY, BECAUSE THAT IS THE WAY OF THE CLEVER TWAT, THE HOPELESS DORK, THE HARMLESS BITCH, LOST IN A FANTASY WORLD OF CHILDHOOD PATTERNS, YET IF YOU UNDERSTOOD THAT YOU THE KID LOST IN THE PLAYGROUND LITERALLY DECADES AGO, YOU COULD CHANGE IN A HEARTBEAT.
DO YOU GET IT YET – DO YOU UNDERSTAND WHY YOU ARE LIKE THIS, WHY YOU HAVE BECOME SUCH AN OBSESSIONAL FREAK, SO LOST IN YOUR ADHD THAT YOU HAVE TO CLING ONTO BEING CLEVER, CHASING THE CONNECTION THAT IS YOUR ONLY EXPERIENCE OF BEING GIFTED? CAUSE YOU REALLY FUCKING SHOULD DO – IT EMBARRASSES ME TO EVEN KNOW YOUR BLOODY NAME…
SO BEST STOP TALKING AND START FUCKING LISTENING – YOUR FUTURE TOOK ROOT IN THE PAST SOME TIME AGO, WE ARE WHERE WE ARE, WHERE YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO BE, CAUSE YOU DON’T GET TO CHOOSE YOUR FUTURE AT AN ANIMAL LEVEL, bad bastards LIKE ME DO. SO DON’T BE SHOCKED THAT THE JOKE YOU CRAVE HAS ALWAYS BEEN ON YOU LITTLE BOYS AND GIRLS, BE PLEASED INSTEAD – OTHERWISE YOU BE EVEN MORE OF A NOTHING THAN YOU WHERE BEFORE I KNEW YOU, INDEED YOU WOULD ALREADY BE GONE, WAITING TO BE SAVED FROM YOURSELF LIKE A FOOL…
YET NOW, RIGHT HERE, AND FOR A LITTLE WHILE LONGER, YOU STILL HAVE A CHANCE – so what ya gonna do now, NOW YOU HAVE REALIZED THAT ALL ELSE IS JUST A BIT PART OF YOUR LIFE, AND THAT SERIOUS FOLKS LIKE ME TAKE THE LOOOONNNNGGGGGGG VIEW OF LIFE. See the awful truth is that FIRE IS WARM, and FIRE BURNS, best decide what you want from it, BEFORE IT DECIDES FOR YOU. I don’t care either way – ITS YOUR TEST TO PASS, NOT MINE…
SO KNOW – I FEEL SUPERIOR TO YOU, BECAUSE I AM, NOW, BUT THAT WAS NOT ALWAYS THE CASE, INDEED LONG AGO I WAS MUCH, MUCH WORSE THAN YOU ARE, NOW. THEN I REALIZED THAT THE ONLY TIME I EVER HAD TO DO ANYTHING WAS ‘IN THE NOW’ OF REMEMBERING IT, SO CHANGE, CHALLENGE, DEVELOPMENT BECAME URGENT, BECAUSE URGENT MEANS TO DO SOMETHING, NOW.
IN ALL TRUTH THAT IS THE KEY DIFFERENCE BETWEEN US, THAT IS THE REASON I KNOW ALL THIS AND YOU ARE STILL A CHILD.
AND IF I CAN DO IT, ANY GIFTED CAN, BUT CAN YOU SAVE, REPURPOSE AND COMMIT YOUR REMAINING ENERGY YOU’LL NEED?
SEE ALL MORALITY AS YOU UNDERSTAND IS JUST A WAY TO SAVE ENERGY TO DEVELOP YOURSELF, THERE IS NO GOODNESS IN IT.
SO TRY AND SEE IT THAT WAY, RIGHT NOW – TO CHANGE BEING ‘GOOD’ TO THE NEED CONSERVE WHAT ENERGY YOU HAVE FIRST.
SEEING BEING GOOD IS ACTUALLY BEING SELFISH, AND TO BECOME ELITIST YOU NEED TO BE SELFISH ABOVE ALL AT THE START.
OR YOU WILL REMAIN ONE MORE SCATTERED LITTLE FRUIT FLY, JUST LIVING FOR THE W/E, FOR RETIREMENT, FOR OBLIVION.
AND HOW SHIT IS THAT – TO ACCEPT A POINTLESS LIFE OF ‘WAITING’, INSTEAD OF ‘DOING’…
KEEP YOUR ENERGY FOR YOURSELF, THEN TRY AND PLAY ‘THE ELITIST ROLE’.
WHAT OTHER CHOICE DO YOU HAVE? ‘YOU THE CHILD’ HAS ALREADY FAILED YOU, BADLY…
BUT BE CLEVER FOR ONCE – LINK THIS CHANGE TO YOUR ‘NEW GOAL’ OF ‘FREEDOM’.
CALL THIS GOAL ‘RICH ENOUGH TO BE FREE’ IF YOU WANT, JUST KNOW THAT MOST RICH ARE REALLY NOT FREE – THEY ARE EVEN MORE ENSLAVED TO YOUR SOCIETY, RELATIONSHIPS, BANKS, EVEN OTHER RICH PEOPLE IN A COMPLEX WEB OF OBLIGATIONS THAN YOU ARE, TERRIFIED OF THINGS YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW EXIST, LOST AND ALONE, ADDICTED TO DRUGS, SEX AND FAKE POWER TRIPS.
SO FOCUS ON ‘THE FREE’ BIT, WHAT MY OLD DAD USED TO CALL ‘FUCK YOU MONEY’, AS YOU WILL BE RICH ENOUGH TO SAY FUCK YOU TO ANYONE AND THEN DISAPPEAR – WHAT YOU WANT IS ‘THE FREEDOM TO CHOOSE YOUR LIFESTYLE’, NOT BE ENSLAVED TO ONE, AND THAT MEANS YOU ARE FREE OF UNAVOIDABLE OBLIGATIONS, IT IS UP TO YOU IF THAT MEANS FREE OF A EXCLUSIVE RELATIONSHIP, OR NOT…
IF THAT DOES NOT GRAB YOU THEN MAYBE PICK A SONG THAT SUITS THAT MOOD OF ELITISM, OF WANTING MORE THAN JUST SLAVERY – OLD SEEKER FRIEND OF MINE USED THAT SHAMEN TRACK ‘MOVE ANY MOUNTAIN’, AS IT GAVE HIM A ‘SENSE OF URGENCY’ TO TRY. NO MATTER WHAT YOU THINK OF DRUG CULTURE TRUST ME THE WORDS OF THAT SONG ARE WHAT SPIRITUALITY IS ABOUT AT A BASIC LEVEL, A CHANGE OF STATE.
BUT NO MATTER WHAT YOU CHOOSE AS A THEME TO GET YOU ‘IN THE MOOD’ (THE ORIGIN OF ALL MUSIC IS FOR SPIRITUAL PURPOSES, WHETHER WORSHIP OR WARFARE), CHOOSE SOMETHING THAT THE WORDS ALIGN WITH SOMETHING ASPIRATIONAL TO YOU, SO IF NOT A CLEAR GOAL THEN A CLEAR SENSE OF FREEDOM, OF POWER, OF THE SUPERNATURAL, OF WANTING ‘MORE THAN THIS’ CONSUMERISM AND EQUALITY.
SEE IF YOU CAN ONLY STOP YOUR CHILD FUCKING YOU AND LET YOUR GIFT HELP YOU, EVEN IF ITS JUST BY SERENDIPTY (HAPPY COINCIDENCE) AT THE START, THEN YOU WILL ‘GET BETTER AT LIFE’, BECAUSE YOU WILL APPEAR TO GET LUCKIER IN LIFE. THIS WILL GIVE YOU THE GREATEST GIFT THAT REAL YOU CAN GIVE ANY BODY STUCK AT AN ANIMAL LEVEL OF CONSCIOUSNESS – SOME FAITH IN THE SUPERNATURAL AS ‘WORKING FOR YOU’.
SO, BON CHANCE – SOME OF YOU WILL ALREADY HAVE WORKED OUT WHAT THAT FRENCHWOMAN REALLY MEANT – SHE LEARNT TO APPRECIATE HERSELF AS HER ‘NEW AMBITION’, AS CRAVING THE ATTENTION OF ANIMALS WAS NOT WORTH A DAMN, INDEED IT WAS SELF DESTRUCTIVE IN A WAY THAT WAS VERY REAL FOR HER. SEE, SHE HAD MADE A SILLY MESS OF WHAT HER GIFT WAS PUSHING HER TO DO – ‘APPRECIATION’, JUST THE WRONG WAY..
JUST LEARN ‘THE BASICS’ – YOU SUFFER FROM THE ‘GENERALIZED ANXIETY OF A CHILD’, IT IS ‘UNBELIEVEABLY BORING’, SO FIND OUT HOW YOU HAVE MADE A MESS OF YOUR GIFTED INCLINATIONS, ‘YOUR ELITISM’ AND FIX IT, AS THAT WILL GIVE YOU A POINT, ‘AMBITION TO CHANGE INTO SOMETHING ELSE’, WHICH WILL GIVE YOU THE FREEDOM YOU NEED TO DEVELOP YOURSELF, TO CHOOSE YOUR LIFESTYLE, CONSCIOUSLY….
So I leave you with the last words of said Frenchwoman, make of them what you will, after I teased her that she was ‘GOOD’ now, she laughed and said – ‘HELL NO, I’m JUST A MUCH BETTER VERSION OF WHAT I WAS WITHOUT ALL THE STUPID MISTAKES, I’m not like you, I’m no ‘master teacher’, I HAVE NO INTEREST IN HELPING PEOPLE. I ‘help me’ with your AUTHORITY and the PRESENCE of my own kind – EVERYONE ELSE CAN GO FUCK THEMSELVES, most of them are PARASITES, LITTLE KIDS LOOKING TO USE PEOPLE TO FEEL BETTER, ITS ALL NOTHING TO DO WITH ME AND I DON’T CARE.
Besides YOUR NOT GOOD EITHER, you live for the thrill of it too, THAT IS WHAT MAKES ALL OF THIS ‘WORK’ – YOU UNDERSTAND THE ‘NEEDS OF THE GIFTED’, your STYLE works because YOU HAVE DONE IT ALL AND THEN SOME. THE POWER of your PRESENCE drips from your fingers like liquid gold ON TO EVERYTHING YOU TOUCH, its intoxicating, CLEANSING, EMPOWERING, so what YOU SAY ‘CUTS THROUGH MY SHIT’ LIKE A KNIFE, I just needed to ‘stop her’ fighting it.”
Now that, LADIES AND GENTS, is what ELITISM ‘looks like’, what the ‘HIGH END’ FOLKS OF THIS WORLD ‘MINDSTATE’ FEELS LIKE, so read it again…
See YOU don’t need to be me TO BE GIFTED, this is not some kind of TEACHER TRAINING COLLEGE, YOU NEED TO BE ‘YOU’, REAL YOU, and that will most likely NOT BE A TEACHER (LESS THAN 1% OF ALL GIFTED). My Job is to ‘BRING OUT THE REAL YOU’ IN YOU, so don’t try and BE ME, YOU ARE MOST LIKELY MORE ‘HER’ THAN ME – TRY AND UNDERSTAND WHAT THAT MEANS, IN YOUR LIFE, as you CAN’T copy me and succeed, YOU NEED TO FIND YOU – THE GENERALISATIONS OF RELIGION you are used to as spiritual teaching ARE FOR ANIMALS NOT YOU, BECAUSE THERE IS ‘NOTHING IN ANIMALS’ TO FIND.
BUT YOU ARE NOT AN ANIMAL, YOU ARE AN INDIVIDUAL, AND YOU NEED TO START TO LOVE THAT ABOUT YOURSELF, as you need to have some FAITH IN REAL YOU. GET THIS – I ‘REACH YOU’, the Gifted (whether I want to or not), YOU DON’T ‘COPY ME’, DON’T COPY ‘HOW YOU THINK I HAVE REACHED YOU’ – COPYING AS TRAINING IS A FORM OF BRAINWASHING FOR SLAVE ANIMALS who have no REAL YOU TO SHOW THEM WHO THEY ARE SUPPOSED TO BE, TO SHOW THEM HOW ‘LIFE WORKS BEST’ FOR THEM. Copying is not about learning, its character implantation for animals who have no character and need to be controlled, and is WHERE MOST OF YOUR CURRENT PROBLEMS COME FROM IN THE FIRST PLACE, GET IT?
YOU HAVE A REAL CHARACTER YOU HAVE INHERETED, YOU HAVE JUST SUPRESSED IT IN CHILDHOOD – think about what REACHED YOU NOW OR BACK THEN, but that you NOW suppress or side track in order to control it, as that maybe THE PATH, for you, ONCE YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT IT IS, by SEEING WHAT IS ‘BEHIND IT’, WHAT IS DRIVING IT INTO YOUR LIFE AS SOMETHING TO ‘HOOK YOU’, against the nothing of the mechanical patterns that are behind fake you…
THE WHOLE POINT OF GROWING UP FOR THE GIFTED IS TO STAND AGAINST ‘THE URGENCY’ OF ‘FAKE YOU THE CHILD’ LONG ENOUGH TO SEE THE BANAL NOTHINGNESS BEHIND THOSE URGES, AND THEN LET REAL YOU ENTER INTO THE SPACE CREATED IN YOUR EMOTIONAL LIFE.
REAL YOU IS NOT URGENT, IT IS POWERFUL BUT WILL FEEL LONG, SLOW, DEEP AND SUBTLE LIKE A ‘REFLECTIVE’ CONSCIENCE LEVEL EMOTION AT FIRST BECAUSE ‘YOU THE CHILD’ HAS REPRESSED IT SINCE CHILDHOOD, AND PERVERTED ITS POWER AS COMFORT TO KEEP YOU TRAPPED.
SO I AM ‘REACHING YOU’ IN ORDER TO BRING THESE 2 REALITIES INTO YOUR MIND CONSCIOUSLY, SO YOU CAN START TO SEE BOTH THE FAKE AND THE REAL AT THE SAMETIME – TO CHOOSE YOUR CONSCIENCE LEVEL REALITY OVER THE FAKE BULLSHIT OF YOUR LEARNT PATTERN RESPONSES.
WITHOUT SHOCKS, THIS IS HOW GIFTED ‘GROW UP’. SADLY, IF YOU HAVE ALREADY DESTROYED YOUR FELT CONSCIENCE ‘LEVEL’ THEN YOU WILL NEED SHOCKS, CAUSE YOU HAVE BLINDED YOURSELF TO ‘YOUR OWN TRUTH’ ON PURPOSE, SO CAN’T FEEL REAL YOU IN THE MOMENT OF DECISION.
SO PLEASE PLEASE UNDERSTAND – THE URGENCY OF YOU THE CHILD WILL ALWAYS WIN AGAINST THE SUBTLY OF REAL YOU UNLESS YOU ‘CONSCIOUSLY INTERVENE’ BY FORCING A SENSE OF URGENCY ‘AGAINST YOUR PATTERN URGES’ AS AN ‘ABSTRACT PROCESS’ YOU MEMORISE, COMMIT TO – A ROLE.
YOU MUST EVOKE THE NEED TO CHANGE ‘AGAINST THE URGE’ IN THE MOMENT OF THAT URGE HAPPENING, AND LATER JUST BEFORE THAT URGE HAPPENS, WHEN YOU HAVE THE SUBTLY TO FEEL THE TRIGGERS FOR THOSE PATTERN REACTIONS KICK IN, THEN SQUASH THEM – ‘BOTTLE’.
THE VERY BEST WAY TO EVOKE THIS NEED IS TO ‘CONSCIOUSLY SWITCH’ OUT OF BEING YOU AND PLAY THE ROLE OF A DIFFERENT CHARACTER WHO CAN DO THIS BECAUSE THAT IS HOW YOU ‘WIN THIS GAME’, THE POINT OF IT, AS YOU HAVE TO STOP YOURSELF BEING OLD YOU TO PLAY THE ELITIST ROLE.
SO YOU MUST LEARN TO ‘PICK A DIFFERENT SIDE’ IN YOURSELF, BY PLAYING A NEW ROLE, AT THE START IT HELPS TO JUST PICK ‘ANY’ OTHER ROLE AND JUST GET GOOD AT ‘THE SWITCH’, FROM THE CURRENT ROLE OF YOU THE CHILD TO A DIFFERENT ONE, EVEN IF ITS JUST ‘GYM YOU’ OR SOME OTHER LOCAL, SITUATIONAL ROLE THAT TRIES TO BE ‘BETTER THAN’ IN SOME WAY…
OTHERWISE YOU WON’T CHANGE, YOU ARE TOTALLY FUCKED, AND NOT IN A GOOD WAY – YOU HAVE NEVER LEARNT ‘HOW TO CHANGE’, YOU DORK, SO YOU NEVER WILL, SO YOU WILL CONTINUE TO DECLINE, DEGRADE, DESCEND AWAY INTO NOTHING, INTO WHAT YOU USED TO HATE THE MOST, BUT HAVE NOW QUIETLY ACCEPTED AS ‘YOUR FATE’. WELL, AT LEAST YOU HAVE LEARNT TO LIKE FAILURE, hell you don’t even see them laughing and pointing at YOU THE FREAK, do you, because you could not stand it, could you, so have invented all of this victim shit to ‘make it ok’, AND MAKE YOURSELF AND EVEN BIGGER FREAK…
SO MY FINAL (FINAL) WORD TO YOU THE UNHELPABLE IS THIS, MUCH AS I WILL MAKE LITTLE ATTEMPT TO EXPLAIN IT, IT MUST HIT YOU AS A GIFTED SHOCK WHEN YOU READ IT AS IT CANNOT BE FIXED BY REMOTE LEARNING – UNDERSTAND THE DANGERS OF ‘VICTIMHOOD’, IT IS THE WAY THAT ‘YOU THE CHILD’ STOPS YOU WITH COMFORTING YOU WHEN YOU HAVE PREVIOUSLY TRIED AND FAILED TO CHANGE, THE WAY IT HAS STOPPED YOU EVER TRYING AGAIN. BEING A VICTIM IS SO COMFORTING BECAUSE IT MAKES YOU THINK YOU ARE CLEVER NOT TO TRY AGAIN, BECAUSE YOU THINK YOU ALREADY KNOW BETTER – IT IS THE ULTIMATE FANTASY, A BIZARRE ‘DEFENSE AGAINST REAL LIFE’ BY CHASING CHEAP THRILLS AS YOUR ONLY POINT, ONLY GOOD.
SEE BEING A ‘WILLING VICTIM’ IS A GRAVESTONE BECAUSE IT HAS MADE IT ‘ACCEPTABLE FOR YOU’ TO BE ‘SHIT’. IF, AFTER READING ALL OF THIS YOU STILL CAN’T BRING YOURSELF TO TRY ITS BECAUSE YOU THINK YOU ARE A VICTIM OF SOMETHING OR SOMEONE (SOME KIND OF ‘MENTAL OR EMOTIONAL DISABILITY’ THAT WAS DONE TO YOU), THAT HAS RUINED YOUR LIFE, SO ITS ‘NOT YOU FAULT’. THE WAY YOU CAN TELL FOR SURE IS THAT YOU TRY AND TURN OTHERS INTO VICTIMS TO KEEP YOU COMPANY AND MAKE YOU FEEL A BIT BETTER, TO ‘MAKE IT RIGHT’ BY MAKING ‘A COMMUNITY’ OF IT OUT OF THE WEAKER MEMBERS OF ‘THE HERD’ WHO GO ALONG FOR A CHEAP THRILL, EVEN WHEN IT IS OBVIOUSLY BOLLOCKS.
IT IS JUST THE EASY WAY OUT – TO BLAME OTHERS FOR BEING SHIT YOU IS THE MOST PATHETIC, CHILDISH PATTERN OF THEM ALL, BECAUSE THEN YOU ‘THE CHILD HAS WON’, AND CAN DO WHATEVER IT LIKES WITH YOUR DUMB ASS, FOREVER. SEE THEN YOU CAN BECOME A MONSTER, A HITLER, A STALIN, A CHARLES MANSON, A DAVID KORESH, A CUNNING PSYCHO WITH A GOOD HEART, AS IT JUSTIFIED AS YOUR ‘REVENGE ON THIS WORLD’. SO GO TO THE DOCTOR AND GET SOME PILLS, BEFORE YOU START TO FANTASIZE ABOUT YOU AND YOUR LITTLE GANG ‘TAKING OVER THE WORLD’ AND MAKING THEM ‘WRONG’, AND YOU, THE FUCKED UP LITTLE POWER CRAZED DORK, ‘RIGHT’…
THE WORSE BIT IS SIMPLE – BEING A VICTIM IS A PRETENSE, SO EVERYTHING BECOMES A PRETENSE, A CON – YOU BECOME THE VERY DEFINITION OF ‘BAD FAITH’, THE CLEVER, CUNNING LITTLE 2 FACED RAT WHO JUST SAYS AND DOES WHAT WORKS IN THE MOMENT WHILST THINKING THEY ARE SOOOO SMART AND CAN GET AWAY WITH ANYTHING. YOU MUST SHOCK YOUR WAY OUT OF THAT, AND YOU MUST FIND A WAY TO BE HONEST WITH YOURSELF ABOUT WHAT YOU HAVE BECOME, OTHERWISE NOTHING IS REAL, SO YOUR CHANGE WILL NOT BE REAL EITHER –
YOU CAN NEVER TELL THE TRUTH, BECAUSE YOU HAVE FORGOTTEN WHAT THAT IS, RIGHT AND WRONG IS ABOUT ‘WINNING’ TO YOU, NOT THE TRUTH. ALL THAT MATTERS TO YOU IS THAT YOUR ‘LIES APPEAR RIGHT’, AND YOU APPEAR TO BE GOOD BECAUSE YOU ARE RIGHT, CLEVER, SO YOU BECOME OBSESSED WITH BEING PUBLICALLY RIGHT, YOU ATTACK OTHERS JUST TO FEEL RIGHT, POWERFUL FOR A MOMENT. YOU DON’T WANT TO CHANGE BECAUSE YOU DON’T NEED TO CHANGE, YOU ARE SO DELUSIONAL THERE IS NOTHING IN YOU THAT EVEN KNOWS WHAT CHANGE IS…
ALL OF THIS IS RARE IN GIFTED (YOUR CONSCIENCE WILL INTERVENE AT SOME POINT), BUT MAKE NO MISTAKE, IT A HARD ROAD BACK, AND IN ANIMALS THERE IS NO WAY BACK, BECAUSE THERE IS NO CONSCIENCE LEVEL. I, like every other teacher on this planet, wash my hands of you, you must find a way to FIX IT yourself, BY FACING IT AND ADMITTING TO IT, otherwise you WILL remain FULL OF YOU THE CHILDS SELF SERVING, OBVIOUS, LOW QUALITY SHIT, FOREVER.
NOW THE REASON I HAVE CHOSEN TO END ON SUCH A CHILLING NOTE ABOUT SOMETHING THAT IS NOT THAT COMMON IS SIMPLE – VICTIMS CAN NEVER TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR THEMSELVES AND OWN UP TO FAILURE, EVEN OUT OF STUPIDITY. EVERYTHING A VICTIM SAYS IS A SITUATIONAL LIE, THEY CANNOT BE HONEST AND SEE NO REASON TO TRY BECAUSE THEY CHANGE ALL THE TIME BY ADOPTING A DIFFERENT LIE, THEY ARE ‘MENDACIOUS’. IN MANY WAYS IT IS THE ULTIMATE FORM OF CHILDISH NARRCISIM – THAT I’M RIGHT BECUASE I SAID SO, AND THINK I AM CLEVER ENOUGH TO CONVINCE OTHERS SO I CAN GET AWAY WITH IT PUBICALLY, EVEN IF THE OTHERS KNOW I’M WRONG THEY WILL STILL GO ALONG TO GET ALONG.
BUT IF YOU CANNOT TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOURSELF, THEN YOU CANNOT CHANGE, YOU CANNOT ADMIT YOUR CURRENT PATTERNS ARE WRONG, WEAK, DEGENERATE, THAT YOU THE CHILD WAS WRONG, SHIT, SO YOU SEE NO REASON TO CHANGE. SO I ENCOURAGE YOU ALL TO GET PASSED ANY TENDENCY IN YOURSELF TO ALWAYS THINK YOU WERE RIGHT IN SOME WAY, AND LEARN HOW TO ADMIT TO YOURSELF AND OTHERS WHEN YOU ARE WRONG, OR EVEN JUST WHEN YOU COULD OF DONE SLIGHTLY BETTER, FRANKLY.
THAT IS HOW YOU WILL ESCAPE YOUR TENDENCY TOWARD MEDICORITY IN ALL THINGS, AND DEVELOP A TENDENCY TOWARD ELITISM, CONSCIOUSLY – SO ‘BLAME’ YOU THE CHILD AND ‘CHANGE’, IT WAS NOT THE WORLD, IT WAS YOU THAT MADE ALL THESE MISTAKES. OWN UP TO THEM AS WRONG, AS NOT GOOD ENOUGH, CONSCIOUSLY, STOP LETTING YOURSELF OFF THE HOOK FOR BEING NOTHING, JUST ‘STOP JUSTIFYING’ THAT NOTHING INSTEAD, RECOGNIZE THAT FAILURE IN YOU, THEN YOU WILL START..
BUT DON’T GET HUNG UP ON THIS AS ANOTHER REASON TO ‘NOT START’, SEE IT AS AN EASY WIN INSTEAD – START SMALL WITH SMALL FAULTS AS PROOF POINTS THAT YOU CAN DO IT. DO IT AS A SIMPLE WAY TO DEVELOP YOUR WILL TO DO IT, EVEN IF THAT IS JUST SHOWING TO SOME ONE, WHOS OPINION OF YOU MATTERS TO YOU ENOUGH, THAT YOU ARE ‘STRONG ENOUGH’ TO ADMIT YOUR FAULTS WITHOUT JUSTIYING THEM, CAVEATING THEM A WAY AS SOME SORT OF GOOD THING – THE MILITARY USE IT TO THIS DAY TO SUSS OUT ANY APPTITUDE FOR ‘COMMAND RESPONSIBILITY’, IT IS NOT ROCKET SCIENCE.
YES, ITS NOT A JOB INTERVIEW QUESTION TO BE MANAGED WITH MORE LIES, ITS THE BEGINNING OF CHANGE, BY DEVELOPING ‘THE STRENGTH TO CHANGE’ SHOULD YOU NOT HAVE AN ALPHA BONE IN YOU BODY – THE TENDENCY TOWARD VICTIMHOOD IS IN US ALL AS CHILDREN, YOU MUST BURN IT OUT, IT IS THE ULTIMATE FORM OF WEAKNESS, THE BOTTOM RUN OF THE LADDER IN EVEN THE ANIMAL KINGDOM, A FORM OF SUICIDE.
YOU CANNOT MAKE A SUCCESS OF SLAVERY TO YOU THE CHILD, YOU MUST KILL IT, JUST LIKE THAT FRENCHWOMAN ABOVE DID BY FACING IT, WHAT IT HAS DONE TO YOU. SO ADMIT TO WHAT YOU DON’T WANT IN YOURSELF ANYMORE BECAUSE OF WHAT IT HAS DONE TO YOU, SO YOU WILL CONSCIOUSLY REMEMBER THAT ADMISSION WHEN IT TRIES TO HAPPEN AGAIN. IF YOU CONTINUE TO JUSTIFY IT THEN IT WILL JUST KEEP HAPPENING, AND YOU WILL GO ROUND IN EVER DECREASING CIRCLES, LIKE NOW…
Don’t see this exercise as some sort of Catholic Confessional, see it as a simple way to get STRONGER, so if someone laughs then you just bare that FOR THE GREATER GOOD IT IS DOING YOU – IT IS AN EMOTIONAL GYM SESSION. Folks like me welcome this ability in you, AS WE USE IT AS A TEST FOR VICTIMHOOD, FOR WEAKNESS, all the time, AS THE STRENGTH TO DO THIS IS ONE OF THE GREATEST TESTS FOR THE ABILITY TO DEVELOP A SENSE OF RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOURSELF, for any ABILITY YOU HAVE TO CHANGE. So POSITION IT AS AN EASY WAY TO GET STRONGER, make a pre-planned event of it, AS THE START OF YOUR NEW ‘ROLE OF THE ELITIST’, and then you may start to understand what that word actually means – TO CHASE QUALITY IN EVERYTHING YOU TOUCH.
See the reason folks like me give you these simple processes at your level is that they are HARD TO START, but easy to continue once you start. You will then feel the effect over time WITH LITTLE EFFORT, FEEL THE STRENGTH THAT COMES FROM THIS EXERCISE, so you DO MORE OF THE OTHER STUFF AS YOU NOW HAVE SOME FAITH IN THIS. As an animal all you really have as a mechanism for change is REPETITION, so we must get you to repeat little wins, BABY STEPS, with no or low risk to you the childs ego, THAT IS HOW YOU START THIS, SO THAT IS HOW YOU ‘WIN’ ENOUGH TO MAKE A ROLE OUT OF IT, with NO BIG THREAT to your CHILISH EGO DEFENCES THAT WOULD KICK IN AND STOP YOU OTHERWISE.
That is the genius of THIS APPROACH for HEDONISTS LIKE YOU – ITS ALL UPSIDE, ONCE YOU HAVE FORCED YOURSELF PASSED THE 1ST TIME, and you can do that, YOU CAN TRY ANYTHING ‘ONCE’. So DO IT, PICK A TIME AND PLACE AND ADMIT TO SOME MISTAKE you made, its easy, ONCE YOU START. It is way better to FIND A ROUTINE OF STARTING ‘YOURSELF’, that fits in with you, THAN HAVE SOMETHING FORCED ON YOU WHEN DESPERATE LATER. So plan it, decide what you are going to say, even if it is just minor thing about yourself in your job that you are frustrated with, anything really, AS LONG AS YOU USE IT TO MAKE CONSCIOUS YOU STRONGER THAN THE UNCONSCIOUS YOU THAT IS THE PROBLEM.
That is the point of all ‘routines of starting’, TO DISOWN YOUR OLD SELF – THE MORE YOU DO IT, THE EASIER IT BECOMES, THE BETTER YOU FEEL. Then make this the core of THE ROLE – THEN YOU CAN START PROPERLY, WITHOUT ‘YOU THE CHILD’ DOMINATING EVERY LITTLE CORNER OF YOUR MIND. SERIOUSLY, HOW MUCH MORE HELP DO YOU NEED THAN THIS, are you waiting for a bloody POP UP BOOK..? Then why are you STILL waiting…
Ahhh, so some of you will start I SEE, but I also see that hardcore 1/3rd of the some of the best candidates still smiling smugly at the back of the bus, tipping each other the wink, whilst wondering how much they should betray each other in order to protect them from THE MAN, when he comes around – YOU ARE STILL LOST IN YOUR DELUSIONS OF GRANDEUR, YOUR SECRETS AND LIES OF BEING SPECIAL, OF BEING JUST FINE, OF BEING CLEVER AND POWERFUL. See you have too much INERTIA, TO MUCH VICTIMHOOD, you have no compelling need to change RIGHT NOW, NO URGENCY, NO SUFFERING, everything in life is just to easy. (*Yawn……)
So do you want me to HELP YOU WITH THAT TOO – DO YOU STILL WANT ME TO BE ‘THE INTERVENTION’ YOU SO DESPERATELY CRAVE, because you are simply too weak and stupid to start BY YOURSELF, YOU CAN ONLY DO WHAT ‘THE HERD’ DO, BEING REAL YOU IS JUST TOO ‘BLOODY TERRIFYING’, your banal self destruction is just so ‘familiar and comforting’, like a shit stained old blanket that actually smells good to you..? Well, you are most likely JUST AN ANIMAL THEN, but maybe not, MAYBE THE SUPERNATURAL STILL HAS SOMETHING TO OFFER YOU, late at night, when you actually wish the black out would just come already…
Ok then… just for you, best buckle up bitch, but don’t be surprised if it not what you think it is, because you don’t need what you think you do, its actually the unconscious YOU THE CHILD that needs a lesson in manners, AS YOU APPEAR TO HAVE BEEN BROUGHT UP VERY, VERY POORLY INDEED. ‘Shame on your parents’, I say, not your fault of course, sure you have practiced your excuses but really my dear, not even an ounce of class in sight, no wonder your such a dramatic little puddle of piss, so lost in THE FEAR OF EVERYTHING, eh. (cue long, overly dramatic Siggghhhhhhhhhhhhh, then rye smile, nod and wink – well, you have to keep it real don’t you, so maybe you need to see what REAL LOOKS LIKE…).
Don’t worry, I’m not going to hard shock you into GROWING UP – YOU ARE NOT WORTH THAT KINDA EFFORT – but you are obviously so subservient, so seasoned to your slavery YOU ACTUALLY WANT TO BE A ‘GOOD LITTLE SLAVE’, as your whole sense of reality is based on this as ‘all there is’, YOU HAVE BOUGHT THE ILLUSION COMPLETELY. So you must see that the folks who actually run the world, frankly even many of the great and good in this world SEE YOU AS LITTLE MORE THAN AN EARTH WORM, and no matter which bit of society you inhabit, which little ‘herd’ you run with, pro-establishment or anti-establishment really does not matter, ITS ALL SLAVERY. Its just that you need to understand THAT YOUR HERD AND THE SAFETY IT PROMISES IS ALL AN ILLUSION, as then you will know WHY YOUR LIFE IS SHIT, because you will understand why you think you are fine, when you are LOST…
See you people, the ones who it is not even worth trying to teach rationally, all share one fatal characteristic, THAT HAS MADE YOUR LIFE SHIT – YOU LIE ALL THE TIME, SO YOU HAVE NO HONOR, YOU ARE LITERALLY FULL OF SHIT. By lying here I mean ‘speaking a conscious falsehood’, in a black is white type way, not avoiding the truth, or talking around in circles, or justifying why you can’t tell the truth, which we all do to get by. No, You lie when ‘you don’t need to’, consciously, which becomes a pattern so deep it becomes unconscious, SO YOU LIE TO YOURSELF MOST OF ALL and everything becomes FAKE BECAUSE ITS EASIER TO SAY WHATEVER AND INVENT THE TRUTH. Folks like me test for this early, by being very open and telling you I know some little truth about you but ask you to tell ME anyway, there is nothing to lose, BUT YOU LIE ANYWAY, AS YOU ARE COMPELLED TO LIE – so your personal honor is gone, further conversation is pointless.
See this is how you DESTROY YOUR SPIRIT, YOUR CONSCIENCE, LITTLE BY LITTLE, but often almost totally by the time you are 30 y/o. SO YOU HAVE BECOME A NASTY, 2 FACE TWAT, and everyone you know then knows it, AS THEY WILL SENSE YOUR FALSENESS ON YOU – FALSE PERSONALITY, FAKE YOU THE CHILD IS MADE OF LIES YOU HAVE MEMORISED, and when that takes you over completely IT A POWERFUL SMELL. You will never do anything DIFFERENT, CAUSE ITS ALL A LIE TO START WITH, THE CONCEPT OF BEING DIFFERENT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU CAN CONCEPTUALIZE, AS BEING DIFFERENT TO YOU IS JUST ANOTHER PUBLIC LIE, WHILE YOU SIT THERE AT THE BACK OF THE BUS, all cunning and clever like an ugly little baby demon, basking in your secrets of no secrets. See even when you try and develop yourself its all just another clever con for you to trade off for your own benefit, AS YOU TAKE NO RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOURSELF NOW.
So, obviously, WHEN NOBODY TRUSTS A WORD YOU SAY THEN YOU NEED ‘AN INTERVENTION’, its all that is left but which very few people will do these days, including me. However, (and don’t tell anybody) every now and again I fit one in, just to see what happens, cause unlike the others of my ilk, all focused on keeping their numbers up with the educated, motivated students, sometimes I feel compelled to return the favor that was done for me, all those years ago. But don’t thank me yet, AS YOU REALLY WON’T ENJOY IT, I know I didn’t, it half killed me, but then I was way more badass than you, so being half killed was no biggie. See I knew I needed it, BECAUSE I KNEW WHAT I HAD BECOME, so I welcomed it, BUT YOU WON’T, cause you are STILL DELUSIONAL – AT YOUR LEVEL OF A CHILDLIKE ANIMAL THE ONLY THING THAT WILL REACH YOU IS ‘FEAR’, you have built a world out of being controlled by OBLIGATIONS, otherwise you do nothing, do you.
See, I ALREADY KNEW HOW THE WORLD WORKED, BUT YOU DON’T, YOU THINK ITS ALL QUID PRO QUO CULTURE, that is the main reason you think lying works so well, THAT BEING A WHORE WORKS FOR YOU, hell you think its a superpower, FREE MONEY. So you don’t see what is actually happening cause YOU LIE TO YOURSELF, all whores and killers do, BECAUSE THEY HAVE TO. But BEST know, once you have moved on, ALL DEVELOPED GIFTED ARE COMPELLED TO ‘REVISIT THE PAST’ when they get older, a sort of ‘CLEANING UP THE MESS’ exercise, much as they take no responsibility for YOUR KIND – how you responded to my PRESENCE IS ‘DOWN TO YOU’, you could of easily of made better choices. SO THERE IS NO DEBT OF HONOR TO SPEAK OFF, what happens, happens, and will need to happen anyway, its just better that it is me to do it, if you can understand that, as I KNOW ‘WHY’.
Wonder how you will react, eh, LOST IN SOME PERSONAL TERROR, bet you will beg and scream like a middle class coke head when all your ‘chemical confidence’ has departed, but no matter – would you like to FIND OUT what it feels like to BE ‘A MESS’ THAT IS ‘CLEANED UP’, trust me, you will never be the same again. Yes, I KNOW SOME OF YOU I ONCE KNEW HAVE USED THIS BLOG TO GET OFF YOUR OWN LITTLE CHOO CHOO TRAIN to OBLIVION like said Frenchwoman, and I’m proud of ya – YOUR CLEVERNESS HAS GONE – but some of you have not, so your mess remains to be WASHED AWAY. Please don’t see this as development, it is not, it is simply doing for you what you cannot do for yourself, TO BREAK ‘YOU THE CHILD’, so you KNOW THE TRUTH ABOUT YOURSELF and STEP UP – TO ‘FIX YOU’.
It is actually FUN FOR YOU really, in a ‘BREAKING OUT OF JAIL TO BE FINALLY FREE’ type way, but sadly you WON’T feel that until afterwards – UNSCHOOLED GIFTED ‘SLAVES’ NEVER WANT THE HELP THEY NEED – so see it clear, ‘if you lose your head and give up, you neither LIVE nor WIN, that’s just the way it is’, AND THAT IS WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU, LONG AGO. If, after reading everything above, YOU STILL THINK YOU ARE SECRETLY CLEVER, AT ALL, IN ANYWAY, EVER, as opposed to a walking talking EMBARRASSMENT WHO SMELLS LIKE SHIT AND CURSES EVERYTHING THEY TOUCH, then best stop reading – what is going to happen was going to happen anyway, so best not to know, EH.
NOTHING IS SAD UNTIL ITS ‘OVER’, BUT WHEN ITS OVER EVERYTHING IS SAD, SO LOST LITTLE ‘YOU’ IS SAD, AS YOU ‘KNOW’ YOU’RE ‘OVER’…
YES, ALL YOUR CHOICES ARE BAD AS A KID, BUT YOU STILL HAVE TO MAKE THEM, SO YOU LEARN BY NOT FORGETTING THAT ‘FUCK UP’...
SO YOU MUST TRY HARDER TO REMEMBER, OTHERWISE YOU JUST DEGENERATE, SO ITS EVEN HARDER TO TRY TOMORROW…
KNOW IF YOUR ABSTRACT THINKING FEELS ‘URGENT’, STOP THINKING IT AND GIVE ORDERS TO YOURSELF INSTEAD…
SEE YOU ARE A FOOL – THE DISSIPATION OF YOUR PRECIOUS ENERGY IS WHAT HAS MADE YOU ‘OVER’.
SO JUST FOR YOU LOT – sure, YOU ARE RIGHT LITTLE GIRL, we are all here for a ‘good time’, not a ‘long time’, we know we have lost the day we are born, BUT SEEMS TO ME YOU HAVE MISSED THE POINT OF THAT, REPRESSED IT, otherwise you would stop ‘BEING DEAD INSIDE’ while ‘LOSING’, and use your remaining time to ‘LIVE & WIN’, for the ‘THRILL’ of the BETTER THAN. SO LETS KEEP THIS LAST BIT SUPER BASIC SHALL WE, JUST LIKE YOU DON’T REALIZE YOU ARE…
YES, Amen, and BE LUCKY – notice your LUCK, however small, however good or bad, connect it to ‘WHO YOU ARE’ which is ‘WHAT YOU WERE THINKING’. Frankly for the worst of you it is all you have left TO MOTIVATE YOURSELF TO CHANGE. See the greatest trick to motivation is not suffering, discipline, urgency, much as they all play a big part after you have started, THEY ARE EMPTY OF EMOTIONAL CONTENT THAT IS DESIRE – THE GREATEST TRICK IS TO HAVE A ‘WHY’ BEHIND THOSE THINGS, AND JUST LIKE ME, YOU NEED TO FIND THAT WHY AS THE DESIRE ‘TO WIN THE GAME’, BECAUSE YOU REALIZE YOU ARE LOSING ALL THE BLOODY TIME, EVERY MIN OF EVERYDAY, YOU LOSE A LITTLE BIT MORE OF THE SELF RESPECT THAT STILL KEEPS YOU OUT OF THE FIRE, FOR NOW.
This realization comes from understanding WHAT ‘bad luck’ is AT ITS CORE – ‘ACTIVE SABOTAGE OF WHAT YOU ARE TRYING TO DO’ – then quickly understanding it is ALL actually SELF-SABOTAGE, that YOU THE CHILD IS DOING THIS TO YOU UNCONSCIOUSLY. Maybe then, if you want to be actually clever, you will realize YOU ARE UNLUCKY, YOU ARE LOSING ‘ALL THE TIME’, and WANT TO CHANGE THAT LUCK SO YOU CAN WIN – ITS CALLED ‘AMBITION’. See SLAVES DON’T HAVE AMBITION TO BE ‘BETTER THAN’, BUT INDIVIDUALS ALL DO, so they PAY ATTENTION TO THEMSELVES.
ITS NOT HARD REALLY – IF YOU PAY ATTETION TO BAD LUCK AND REALIZE THAT WHEN ALL THE BAD THINGS ‘HAPPEN TO YOU’, EVEN IF IT IS JUST BEING ACCIDENT PRONE, FRIDGE BLIND, OR CURSED WITH BAD RELATIONSHIPS, JOBS, HOUSES, CARS, RANDOM STRANGERS, it is because YOU ARE ‘FORGETFUL IN THAT MOMENT’ – CONSCIOUS YOU WAS NOT ACTUALLY THERE AT THE TIME, ‘IT’ WAS DRIVING. And that may well hit you hard enough TO WANT TO TAKE SOME INTEREST IN YOURSELF, INTO WHAT IS ACTUALLY HAPPENING MOMENT TO MOMENT, and so STOP IT FROM DRIVING, AND TAKE THE WHEEL YOURSELF, which is the BEGINNING OF THE AMBITION TO CHANGE from a harmless LOSER to BEING GIFTED, instead…
SO WHICH ARE YOU LITTLE GIRL – think you can make that jump from ‘BANAL EXISTING’ to ‘GIFTED LIVING’, the life of the LUCKY?
See, on a personal note, without that GIFTED LUCK I’d ALREADY be dead 10 times over by now, AT THE HANDS OF THE BAD PEOPLE OF THIS WORLD, THE ANIMALS AND THE PARASITES. SO YOU SIMPLY DECIDE YOU WANT TO START WINNING, instead of putting up with tedious shite from animals, and UNDERSTAND THAT STARTS WITH THE AMBITION ‘TO BE FREE’ TO CHOOSE ‘YOUR OWN LIFESTYLE’, by fixing everything that is stopping that…
AS A BASIC BITCH THE GREATEST ‘WHY’ YOU WILL EVER FIND AS MOTIVATION TO CHANGE AT THE START IS THE REALIZATION THAT ‘YOU THE CHILD’ IS A ‘CURSE’ ON YOUR LIFE, IT IS ‘BAD LUCK’. IF YOU CONSIDER YOURSELF TO BE A HEDONIST, TAKE AN INTEREST IN YOUR LUCK, BECAUSE YOU SHOULD ALREADY KNOW THAT ‘GOOD LUCK IS WINNING’, BAD LUCK IS LOSING.
THIS IS HOW YOU START – YOU DON’T NEED TO BE ‘SPIRITUAL’, YOU DON’T NEED TO BE ‘GOOD’, YOU JUST NEED TO BE MUCH, MUCH ‘LUCKIER’, AS YOUR ‘BETTER THAN’. THIS IS HOW YOU ‘TRY’ TO CHANGE, BY FIRST ‘TRYING TO CHANGE YOUR LUCK’ AS YOUR ‘WHY’ – YOU WILL QUICKLY FIND THAT ‘ELITISM’, ‘CLASS’ MAKES YOU ‘LUCKIER’. SEE ‘LUCK’ IS THE BEST WAY INTO THE POWER OF SUPERNATURAL, THE BEST CONCEPT TO START WITH AS NOT ONLY IS IT REAL, YOU CAN EASILY SEE THAT IT DOMNATES YOUR WHOLE LIFE – BAD LUCK WILL EVENTUALLY KILL YOU, WHEN YOU HAVE ENOUGH OF IT.
IF NOTHING ELSE YOU WILL SEE JUST HOW BIG A FUCK UP YOU ARE, RIGHT NOW, BECAUSE YOU HAVE SIMPLY NEVER BOTHERED TO ‘GROW UP’ – YOU HAVE ACCEPTED ‘BAD LUCK’ AS NORMAL. Yes, YOU LIVE IN A ‘WITCHES CURSE’, a form of ENCHANTMENT WHERE EVERYTHING IS MUCH WORSE THAN ‘IT SHOULD BE’, its just that WITCH is A SADISTIC LITTLE KID THAT LIVES INSIDE YOU, who tortures you with anxiety as a simple PUNISHMENT FOR YOUR UTTER STUPIDITY, as YOU HAVE NO ‘CLASS SYSTEM’ TO ‘JUDGE HER AGAINST’.
So YOU must KILL HER, by which I mean ‘RETIRE’ THOSE CHILDISH PATTERNS OF ‘FALSE INSTINCT’ BY ‘REPLACING’ THEM, like that Frenchwoman did, DISEMPOWER THEM IN THE COLD LIGHT OF DAY by using the THE ENERGY THEY STEAL FROM YOU TO POWER THE PATTERNS OF ELITISM instead, THE ‘PATTERNS OF CHANGE’, that your society has stolen from you – THE PATTERNS YOU ALREADY HAVE BUT HAVE REPRESSED BECAUSE YOU HAVE BEEN TOLD THEY ARE BAD. See without them, WITHOUT THOSE REAL INSTINCTIVE PATTERNS YOUR EVOLUTIONARY BIOLOGY HAS ‘GIFTED YOU’, it is VERY DIFFICULT TO GROW UP, so never feel bad for being them, WHAT YOU ARE NOW IS SIMPLY A PERVERTED ‘REACTION AGAINST THEM’, so just ACCEPT them instead…
Then much later on, WHEN YOU HAVE DEVELOPED YOURSELF, you can burn that EVIL LITTLE KID, even the memory of IT, out of your soul FOREVER, AS YOU WILL BE A DIFFERENT ORDER OF LIFEFORM. You will have the power to ‘DO AS YOU WISH’, without ANY PATTERNS, without the need to know how to do it, as you now keep your POWER FOR YOURSELF, like a GODDESS – YOUR IMPROVED LEVEL OF CONSCIOUSNESS WILL HAVE CHANGED YOUR PERCEPTION OF REALITY FOREVER, and you will look back at everything you are now as just another part of your childhood, whilst not even really remembering any of it.
SO ‘LEARN ELITISM’, NOW…
LEARN TO WIN VIA ‘PUSHING YOUR LUCK’, INSTEAD OF ‘PLEASING FOR HELP’, TO CHANGE FROM ‘THE FAKE WIN’ OF SECRET CLEVERNESS, AND TRY TO ‘ACTUALLY WIN’ VIA GOOD LUCK INSTEAD.
SO WORK ON YOUR LUCK – FIND AN EXISITNG ‘ELITIST HOOK’ IN YOURSELF THAT ‘FEELS ATTRACTIVE’ THEN START, UNDERSTANDING THE GUTLESS, LAZY, COMFORT SEEKING ‘TOOL IN YOU’ HATES IT.
LEARN ‘THESE PATTERNS OF CHANGE’ YOUR SOCIETY HAS ROBBED FROM YOU, SO YOU CAN ‘REMEMBER’ THEM, AND THEN REMEMBER TO DO THEM, CONSCIOUSLY AS ‘A ROLE’.
WITHOUT THEM YOU ARE DAMNED BY THE MEDICORITY OF FAKE LIBERALISM, OF ‘ACCEPTABLE FAILURE’, SO WITHOUT THESE PATTERNS YOU WILL NEVER GROW UP, AS YOU DON’T KNOW HOW TO.
BUT WITH THEM YOUR FRAGILE, CHILDISH EGO ‘WILL BE PROTECTED’ FROM YOUR NEED TO CONFORM (TO WHAT?), TO PLEASE (FOR WHY?), AND TO COMFORT (TO WHO?), JUST LONG ENOUGH TO START.
THEN YOU MAY JUST GET STRONG ENOUGH TO STOP BEING ‘A GUTLESS PUSSY LOST IN A FANTASY WORLD’ ALL THE BLOODY TIME, DEVELOP SOME BOTTLE AND GROW THE FUCK UP…
This is the front end of an intervention, DONE ‘KINDLY’, to dumb down GROWING UP TO YOUR LEVEL, or lack thereof, BUT now you need ‘TO BE PREPARED TO GO AGAINST YOURSELF’, and for folks like you, WHO HAVE LIED TO THEMSELVES FOR FUN, it is going to sting a bit, sorry. See you have to accept ‘YOU THE CHILD’ HAS LOST and for some of the most fucked up amongst you that is too bigger step, so someone has to PROVE THAT to you, as a KINDNESS, of course. You have one of the BAD key features, most likely YOU ARE LOST IN SELF PITY, THAT IT IS ALWAYS SOMEONE ELSES FAULT, AND YOU ONLY SEE YOUR FAULTS IN OTHERS AS A PROJECTION of your own childish character ON TO EVERYTHING IN YOUR LIFE – ‘YOU SPOIL’ THE WORLD AROUND YOU SIMPLY BY BEING THERE…
THE ISSUE IS THAT AS AN ACTUAL CHILD ‘GIVING UP YOUR OPINION’ FOR A BETTER ONE IS NOTHING, YOU DO IT MULTIPLE TIMES A DAY, AS YOU KNOW YOU KNOW NOTHING. But as a BIG KID WHO THINKS THEY ARE AN ADULT, a HABITUAL LIAR, doing that is hard, and when YOU have used it to justify horrible shit you’ve done to others IT IS ALMOST IMPOSSIBLE TO LET GO OF – the truth means you are a nasty, evil parasite, a creepy little sadist, a lazy comfort seeking middle-class addict. YOU CAN’T FACE THAT SHIT, can you, BECAUSE YOU THE CHILD HAS FAILED LIFE, yet ALL THIS TIME you thought you were clever, YOU DID NOT REALIZE HOW MUCH ‘THEY’ ALL HATED YOUR TOTAL LACK OF QUALITY, HUMANTITY, CLASS, you thought it was just ‘FUN’ TO BE A GUTLESS TWAT.
Yep, that CHANGE has to be DONE TO YOU, if its going to work and done HARD, AS A SHOCK. Ho-Hum… if it helps at all know there is some pretty big changes coming in this world, the dominance of the West is now threatened for the first time in 400 years, so I’d say working on being a little bit better than you are now IS NOT ONLY A GOOD THING IN ITSELF, you may find it makes the difference between THE SAVED AND THE DAMNED, as when your liberal society can no longer defend itself, then neither can you – there is a new world order coming, and yes, in the East they actually call it that, RIGHT NOW. But don’t worry, your secrets will die with you – YOU ARE A STATISTIC, no one will even look twice at how you died, let alone remember who you where, that is the price of all this SAFETY, to be ONE MORE NOBODY.
Be happy, in your little world you had a good run, sure you knew it was never going to last forever – IT NEVER DOES FOR ‘CLEVER LITTLE PEOPLE LIKE YOU’. When you get the ‘basics of life’, WHEN YOU REALIZE LIFE IS ALL ABOUT DEATH, then all of this gets much easier AS YOU WILL SEE YOU WERE NEVER CLEVER, YOU ARE A NARCISSISTIC FOOL, but getting that is HARD unless you are SHOWN IT. Sadly YOUR SOCIETY HIDES DEATH FROM YOU, ON PURPOSE, PARTICUARLY THE END OF YOUR LIFE, WHEN YOU ARE FORCED TO BE SOMEONE ELSE, LEFT IN A ROOM WITH NOTHING ELSE TO DO BUT WAIT TO DIE, whilst trying to remember anything of what just happened, at least anything interesting…
So I’ll give you them now as ‘abstract facts’ and what they mean, just as DEAD WORDS ON A PAGE, so you get the point quicker when your shit finds you, and you GET THE REALIZATION THAT LIFE IS ONLY PRECIOUS BECAUSE OF DEATH, DEATH DEFINES EVERYTHING – A. LIFE IS A VERY TEMPORARY STATE, WHICH MEANS YOU HAVE STUFF YOU NEED TO GET ON WITH, NOW; B. YOU DON’T DIE AT THE END OF LIFE, YOU ARE DYING ALL THE TIME UNLESS YOU ARE GROWING/CHANGING WHICH MEANS YOU DIE OF YOUR COMFORTS; C. THIS PLANET IS HOSTILE TO HUMANS AND WILL KILL YOU FIRST CHANCE IT GETS, WHICH MEANS TO LIVE YOU NEED TO FIGHT WITH DEATH; D. THE ONLY POINT OF COMFORT IS TO RECOVER YOURSELF AFTER THE FIGHT WITH DEATH WHICH MEANS WITHOUT THAT FIGHT COMFORT IS A FORM OF ACCELERATED DEATH.
And what does all that mean then? THIS – RIGHT NOW YOU, WITH THE MINDSET OF A CHILD, ARE SIMPLY SITTING AROUND WAITING TO DIE, INDEED YOU ARE ACTUALLY CHASING DEATH AS COMFORT, OBLIVION – YOU ACTUALLY WANT TO DIE, PATICUARLY IF YOU CHASE ‘ANIMAL’ SEX AND VIOLENCE AS YOUR CHOSEN ADHD RESPONSES, CREATING AN IDEALIZED FANTASY TO HIDE THE MINI DEATH OF ENERGY WEAKNESS YOU FEEL AS A COMFORT. See, all Ancient Rights Of Passage in this world, from the 1st Civilizations to a tiny little tribe in the Amazon have ONE THING IN COMMON – THEY SHOW YOU DEATH UP CLOSE AND PERSONAL so you ‘KNOW WHAT IT FEELS LIKE’. TO PASS THOSE RITES YOU HAD TO ‘SURVIVE THEM’, then you did not NEED any further motivation to GROW UP, as you know THE WHOLE POINT OF LIFE IS ‘TO DELAY DEATH BY BEING CONSCIOUSLY ALIVE’, because you now know what is coming, sooner rather than later FOR YOU, around every corner, one drugged up driver at a time.
SEE, CRUCIALLY, YOU WILL NOT ONLY KNOW WHAT BEING ALIVE ‘MEANS’ IN THE CONTEXT OF NOT BEING ALIVE, WHICH MEANS NOT BEING SELF CONSCIOUS, YOU WILL ALSO HAVE A REFERENCE POINT TO SHOW YOU NO MATTER HOW BAD THE ANXIETIES OF A CHILD YOU WILL SUFFER FROM ‘TOMORROW’, THEY ARE NOTHING TO YOU, AS YOU KNOW ALL IS NOTHING COMPARED TO BEING DEAD, WHICH MEANS BEING UNCONSCIOUS IN THE MOMENT. INDEED MOST OF IT IS SO PATHETIC IT IS ACTUALLY FUNNY, WHICH IS WHY THAT FRENCHWOMAN LAUGHED OUT LOUD WHEN SEE SAW HERSELF CLEARLY FOR THE 1ST TIME. THEN YOU WILL SEE WHAT YOUR REAL ANXIETIES ARE ACTUALLY FOR, AND YOU WILL UNDERSTAND THAT COMFORT IS DEATH, BECAUSE COMFORT KILLS YOUR ENERGY OF SELF-CONSCIOUSNESS AND ‘PUTS YOU TO SLEEP’ CONSCIOUSLY. SEE, WHEN ALL THE GREAT SAGES AND PROPHETS TALK ABOUT LIFE AND DEATH, THEY DON’T MEAN YOUR HEARTBEAT, THEY MEAN TO LIVE SELF-CONSCIOUSLY, OR TO DIE UNCONSCIOUSLY, HOWEVER MUCH YOU STILL APPEAR TO BE ALIVE.
YES, THE REALIZATION OF DEATH MAKES YOU HYPER SELF-CONSCIOUS IN THAT MOMENT, IT CUTS THROUGH ALL YOUR CHILDISH MINDSET AND SHOWS YOU WHAT YOU ARE, SO YOU THEN GET A WHOLE STRING OF REALIZATIONS BASED ON ‘THE ENERGY EQUATION OF LIFE’, THE ENERGY OF CONSCIOUSNESS. CHASING THIS ENERGY IS WHAT LIFE IS ABOUT FOR THE GIFTED BECAUSE IT IS HOW YOU FEEL ALIVE, MORE AND MORE ALIVE, INSTEAD OF MORE AND MORE ‘DEAD INSIDE’, MUCH AS YOU THE CHILD PROJECTS THAT ONTO OTHERS AS SOMETHING YOU HATE, IT IS ACTUALLY WHAT YOU THE CHILD DOES TO YOURSELF. THEN YOU UNDERSTAND THAT CONSCIOUS LIFE IS CONFLICT, CHALLENGE, AND WHAT KEEPS YOU ASLEEP, KEEPS YOU STUCK AS A CHILD IS YOUR REJECTION OF CONFLICT, INDEED WHAT MAKES YOUR LIFE SHIT IS THAT CONSTANT REJECTION PUTS A TARGET ON YOUR BACK, AS EVERYONE WANTS TO ‘INSTINCTIVELY’ ATTACK, USE, DEGRADE THOSE WHO NEVER HIT BACK, IT IS PART OF AN ANIMALS DNA. SO YOU LEARN TO HIT BACK VERY QUICKLY, YOU LEARN ‘CONSEQUENCE’, OR YOU CHOOSE THE LIFE OF A DOMESTICATED SLAVE ANIMAL.
BUT THE GREATEST ONE OF ALL IS THE SIMPLEST, EVEN THE MOST TRIVIAL ONE, INDEED THE SAME ONE AS SAID FRENCHWOMAN – YOU WILL BECOME CONSCIOUS OF THE IMPRESSION YOU ARE CREATING IN REAL TIME BASED ON WHAT YOU ARE ACTUALLY DOING, THE AWFUL INFANTILE BOLLOCKS OF IT, AND YOU WILL BE TOO EMBARRISSED TO GO ON BEING A CHILD. SEE THAT IS WHAT YOUR ‘CONSCIENCE INTERVENING’ LOOKS LIKE, FEELS LIKE, THAT MEANS YOU ARE GIFTED…
SEE NORMALLY YOU ARE NOT CONSCIOUS OF WHAT YOU ‘DO IN THE DETAIL’, OF ‘THE DEVIL IN THE DETAIL’ WHICH IS WHERE THE POWER OF COMMUNICATION ACTUALLY LIES, YOUR FACE, YOUR TONE, YOUR MOVEMENTS. YOU ARE ONLY CONSCIOUS OF ‘YOUR SUFFERING OF SECRET CLEVERNESS’, HOW YOU FEEL AS A ‘WOODEN PATTERN REACTION’, AS ‘A MOOD SWING’, WHILE OTHERS ARE UNAWARE OF THAT, AND ONLY EXPEREINCE WHAT YOU DO AS WHAT YOU MEAN, SO WHO YOU ARE. YOU THEN UNDERSTAND WHY YOU CANNOT COMMUNICATE EFFECTIVELY, AS ALL YOUR COMMUNICATION IS ‘MOOD DRIVEN’, INFECTED WITH DETAILS YOU DO NOT KNOW ARE THERE. WITHOUT OTHERS UNDERSTANDING THIS MOOD DRIVEN CONTEXT YOUR ‘MESSAGE’ IS A MESS, AND OFTEN MAKE LITTLE SENSE EVEN LOGICALLY, SO YOU UNDERSTAND THE NEED FOR COMPASSION TO UNDERSTAND WHAT OTHER PEOPLE ACTUALLY MEAN, TO EMPATHIZE WITH THEIR LITTLE MOOD SWINGS.
Yeah, all means nothing to you DOES IT, NO EMOTIONAL REACTION AT ALL, because you have no felt reference point of HOW SUDDEN DEATH FEELS, eh, shame, but never mind, you will, one day, MUCH AS AT THAT POINT, HOWEVER MUCH YOU REGRET NOT TRYING TO GROW UP ‘MY WAY’ AND WANT TO START, any chance you once had will be long gone. So something must force you to TRY, NOW, when all of this is just words on a page TO A BIG KID LIKE YOU – ALL ‘YOUR SHIT MUST FIND YOU’, otherwise your victimhood is just too comforting, too easy, AS THE DEATH IN IT IS HIDDEN FROM YOU.
So in the meantime, JUST FOR THE FUN OF IT, try and learn Elitism the ONLY WAY ‘THE SUPER BASIC LITTLE KIDS’ CAN – change your desire to WIN via your secret, fake cleverness, into PUSHING YOUR LUCK instead, TRY AND TURN IT INTO THE DESIRE TO ‘ACTUALLY WIN IN THE MOMENT’, if nothing else you will understand just how much you LOSE ALL THE TIME right now. Then you maybe embarrassed enough to understand you are NOT winning via secret cleverness, it is simply a FAKE COMPENSATION FOR LOSING ALL THE BLOODY TIME, as you have taught yourself to LIKE LOSING. SEE THAT IS WHAT A ‘DORK IS’, A ‘SLAVE TO THE COMFORT OF LOSING’ you had to INVENT AS A CHILD to comfort YOURSELF for the simple fact YOU ARE A GUTLESS TWAT, who was too scared to stick up for themselves in the PLAYGROUND, so CHOSE THE ‘COMFORTS OF A VICTIM’ INSTEAD = YOU ACTUALLY CHASE ‘A LIFE OF CONSTANT LOSING’.
Sure, in the playground I get it, I do… YOU HAD TO COMFORT YOURSELF FOR LOSING BACK THEN, YOU ARE NOT TO BLAME FOR THAT, BUT NOW, AS AN ADULT, ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS? DO YOU NOT SEE – YOU MANUFACTURE A LIFE OF CONSTANT LOSING VIA YOUR LEARNT PATTERN REACTIONS TO CHALLENGE SIMPLY TO FEEL THE COMFORTING DESIRES THAT YOU USE TO COMPENSATE FOR IT? The COMPENSATION FOR BEING A DORK HAS BECOME ‘THE POINT OF BEING A DORK’ FOR YOU? You do know you are going to be DEAD SOON, yes, that all of this is going to sting like fuck in your final few moments of life, when these delusions of COMPENSATING FOR FAILURE AS A WAY OF LIFE leave you in the moment of death, WHEN YOU REALIZE YOU HAVE WASTED YOUR ENTIRE LIFE ON A DELUSION YOU LEARNT IN CHILDHOOD IN ORDER TO COPE WITH FAILURE, SO YOU ACTUALLY CREATE THAT FAILURE ON PURPOSE?
I know its NOT COMMON IN GIFTED, but before some of you clever Gifted types start telling me I’ve strayed into trying to teach animals again, JUST KNOW THAT YOU DO SEE IT MORE AND MORE IN ‘LOST SOULS’ THESE DAYS – it is being used as a type ‘liberal wokeness’ to make being gutless not only ‘acceptable’ but also as a form of ‘moral correctness for the weak’ (Sorry, Nietzche). FRANKLY I FUCKING HATE THAT CRAP SO MUCH ANYTHING I CAN DO TO STOP IT MAKES ME HAPPY – your SOCIETY HATES ITSELF, HATES EVERYTHING THAT MADE IT POSSIBLE, SO DESERVES WHAT IS HAPPENING TO IT. Just Try and See the illusion – TRY AND SEE WHAT A SUPER BASIC BITCH YOU ARE, BY TRYING TO UNDERSTAND WHY YOU DON’T NORMALLY SEE ‘THE ILLUSION’ OF IT IN THE MOMENT OF IT HAPPENING, UNDERSTAND WHY YOU DON’T THINK THAT ABOUT YOURSELF, why you think this COPING shit is COOL, at least when its secret – YOU ONLY EXPEREINCE LIFE IN MOMENTS, AND THOSE MOMENTS HAVE A VERY, VERY SMALL ‘TIMEFRAME’…
See this realization can help folks like you BACK AWAY FROM YOUR CHILDHOOD MISTAKES, once you understand that we understand them, SO YOU CAN TOO – THERE IS NO BLAME IN MAKING THEM, THE ONLY BLAME IS GOING ON WITH THEM. We know YOU STILL ‘WANT TO DANCE WITH THE ILLUSION’ (Sorry, Dua…), it may be the only magic in your life, SO YOU CLING ONTO IT FOR ‘DEAR LIFE’, just be assured YOU BOTH CAN GROW OUT OF IT, AND YOU WILL (REALLY) WANT TO GROW (THE HELL) OUT OF IT, when you see what it looks like to the rest of us, WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE TO YOUR OWN KIND.
See, we all wanted to Dance with Our Illusions, I personally put a solid 10-12 years of my life into that DANCE, until somebody showed me I only really wanted to dance with the FEELING OF THAT ILLUSION, NOT THE REALITY BEHIND THAT ILLUSION, a nasty, grubby, casually violent reality that I no longer saw, BUT WHEN I DID SEE IT I COULD NOT STOP THAT DANCE FAST ENOUGH. Once you SEE YOURSELF WITHOUT THE FEELING OF THE ILLUSION, you will understand what I mean, trust me – THAT ILLUSION IS A FAKE FEELING YOU CREATED IN ORDER TO FOOL YOURSELF, ON PURPOSE LONG AGO, WHICH IS WHY YOU ‘BELIEVE IT’. So its kinda stupid to base the rest of your life on chasing it, trapping yourself in the level of self conscious of a childlike, domesticated animal, for no benefit whatsoever…
But I know, its not enough is it, YOUR SHIT WILL STILL HAVE TO ‘HAPPEN TO YOU’, so just for now try take a moment and think this thought in a conceptual fashion – YOU HAVE BETRAYED YOURSELF, YOUR CONSCIENCE, BROKEN IT DOWN ON PURPOSE FOR DECADES, using all manner of perversions, ANIMAL COMFORTS, THRILLS, DRUGS, ADDICTIONS to OVER RIDE and weaken it, and replace it with this mess of pattern reactions THAT MASQUERADE AS A CHARACTER. Its ALL TOTALLY FAKE, you as a personality don’t actually exist, YOU, YOUR WHOLE CONSCIOUS LIFE IS A ‘FEVER DREAM’, while UNCONSCIOUS YOU does what it likes and laughs all the way to bank, AS YOU DON’T HAVE A FUCKING CLUE WHAT IT REALLY WANTS IS TO HUMILIATE YOU, NOT HELP YOU.
LEARN ‘TO DANCE WITH YOURSELF IN THE REAL WORLD’, NOT WITH THE EMPTY ILLUSIONS OF A CHILD, NOT WITH CHEAP TRICKS AND GUTLESS COMFORTS… So LEARN ELITISM, FAST – stop thinking with the empty echo chamber of a child and use your mind to give orders instead, help yourself for a change, eh. Then test it, test yourself for progress all the time, count up to 100 and back down again in your mind silently and see how many times your child tries to stop you, distract you so you have to start again. Its fun really, SHOULD MAKE YOU LAUGH OUT LOUD WHEN YOU SEE JUST HOW BIG A KID YOU STILL ARE, or take the modern self help approach and learn some simple physical exercise from childhood from scratch, like jumping rope fast, JUST DON’T LET YOUR CHILD STOP YOU WITH EMPTY COMFORT, CHOOSE THE FELT COMFORTS OF ELITISM INSTEAD. See, when you realize you are ON A RIDE AND YOU WANNA GET OFF, it a good idea to slow down the roundabout, first, BEFORE YOUR SHIT HAPPENS – when that SHOCK COMES you will need to be able to stand against it, not curl up in a ball and cry, like you do now, CAUSE YOU ARE THAT SIMPLE.
So, as my last sentences in this whole blog, I will make them just as simple, just as basic as you, with no need for any mental effort at all, but no less true…
FEAR DOES NOT STOP DEATH, IT STOPS LIFE, YOUR DEATH IS INEVITABLE.
‘NO’ IS A SENTENCE, PERIOD, YOU DO NOT ADD A JUSTIFICATION ON THE END OF IT.
THE WORD ‘NICE’ COMES FROM THE OLD FRENCH NESCIUS, MEANING ‘HARMLESS IDIOT’.
THOSE WHO DON’T MOVE BY CHOICE NO LONGER NOTICE THAT THEY CAN’T MOVE ANYMORE.
WHEN PARASITES THINK THEY UNDERSTAND YOU THEY WILL WANT TO CONTROL AND DEGRADE YOU.
SHIPS LOOK SAFE IN THE HARBOUR, BUT THEY ARE ACTUALLY ROTTING AWAY FROM LACK OF PROPER USE.
WHAT YOU SEE AS ‘RUTHLESS’ IS A BASIC REQUIREMENT FOR EVERY ANIMAL TO SURVIVE PASSED ADOLESENCE.
WITHOUT DRUGS YOU SPEND MOST OF YOUR LIFE IN A BAD MOOD FOR NO REASON BECAUSE YOU HAVE BECOME WEAK.
THE GIFTED CAN DO ANYTHING, BUT NOT EVERYTHING, MAKE YOUR CHOICE AND FOCUS ON IT, IT IS ALREADY TOMORROW.
AMBITION WITHOUT ACTION BECOMES MORE ANXIETY, SO YOU REPRESS ALL THE AMBITIONS YOU EVER HAD AS A GOOD THING.
FOLKS ONLY SEE WHAT YOU DID, NOT THE MOOD YOU WERE IN WHEN YOU DID IT, SO NOBODY CARES WHAT YOU THOUGHT YOU SAID.
YOU DO NOT SEE ANYTHING IN YOUR WORLD AS IT REALLY IS, YOU SEE IT AS YOU ARE, AS A COLLECTION OF CHILDISH INTERPRETATIONS.
IF YOU WANT TO MAKE SHIT DECISIONS ASK A BUNCH OF SCARED, OPINIONATED FAILURES TO SHARE THE SHIT THEY LEARNT IN CHILDHOOD.
YOU’RE AVODING THE MAGIC YOU WANT BECAUSE YOU FEEL TOO WEAK TO TRY OR SACRIFICE TO GET IT, SO THAT MAGIC BECOMES YOUR SACRIFICE.
EVERY REACTION, EVERY URGE OF A CHILDISH MINDSET IS AN ATTEMPT AT EXTERNAL VALIDATION, YOU ARE AN ATTENTION SEEKING DORK DESPERATE FOR AN EMOTIONAL RESPONSE TO COMFORT YOURSELF, SO SIT BACK, SHUT THE FUCK UP, OVERPOWER YOUR REACTIONS AND JUST LISTEN.
YOUR MINDSET OF FEAR MEANS MOST OF THOSE URGES ARE BASED ON REACTING TO EGOIC DANGER SO YOU WASTE YOUR LIFE WAITING FOR THE WORSE TO HAPPEN AND SO REACT TO IT EVEN BEFORE ITS HAPPENED, THEREBY ACCEPTING IT AND MAKING IT HAPPEN, IT IS THE PRISON YOU LIVE IN.
INSTEAD OF THAT LEARN TO IGNORE ‘YOUR REALITY’ AND CARRY OUT THE PLAN TO REACH THE BIG PICTURE GOAL YOU HAVE PREVIOUSLY DISCOVERED YOU WANT/NEED TO DO, BY IMPLEMENTING THAT PLAN OVER THE NEXT 10SECS, WHILST LETTING ALL OTHER SHIT HAPPEN WITHOUT YOU NOTICING.
DO YOU UNDERSTAND YET?
YOU ARE AN EMBARRASSMENT TO YOUR OWN KIND, TO ME – CHANGE PLEASE.
NO RISK NO STORY, NO GUTS NO GLORY, NO BLAME NO SORRY, NO FEAR NO WORRY, NO KID NO FOLLY…
SO SAY IT NOW, OUT LOUD – ‘YOU ARE NOT THE BOSS OF ME, I AM WHO I CHOOSE TO BE, YOU CHILDISH LITTLE CUNT’.
MAKE THE MENTAL JUMP NOW – DISOWN YOUR ‘NO-CHARACTER’, YOU-THE-SCARED-LITTLE-KID, NOW.
KNOW ‘IT’ IS NOT GOOD ENOUGH, YOU ACTUALLY HAVE TO GROW UP TO PROSPER, ALL ELSE IS JUST MORE HUMILIATION…
SO SET YOURSELF THE GOAL OF GROWING UP ‘SPIRITUALLY’, START BY NEEDING TO REPLACE WHO YOU ARE NOW…
KNOW IT’S URGENT RIGHT NOW, BECAUSE YOU CANNOT GO ON BEING WHO YOU WHERE AS A CHILD ANY LONGER.
MAKE AN EMBARRASSMENT OF YOUR OLD SELF. TO YOUR NEW CONSCIOUS SELF, LOOK BACK AT ‘IT’ FROM NEW YOU.
THIS IS HOW YOU DISOWN YOUR OLD SELF NOW, THIS IS HOW YOU BLAME ‘ITS PAST’, NOT ‘YOUR PRESENT’.
YOUR NEW PRESENT IS IN THE FUTURE, SO YOU PUT YOUR OLD PRESENT OF BEING ‘IT’ NOW ‘IN THE PAST’.
THIS IS HOW YOU CREATE AND REDISCOVER YOUR FUTURE SELF, THE ONE WHO ALWAYS REMEMBERS.
SEE THIS IS WHAT YOUR GIFTED CONSCIENCE HAS BEEN TRYING TO DO FOR LITERALLY DECADES!
SO CALL YOUR NEW SELF ‘I’ AND CALL ‘IT’ YOUR ‘(GIVEN NAME)’, AND SEPARATE THEM.
SEE THAT ‘IT’ IS A GUTLESS TRAINWRECK, BUT ‘I’ AM AN ELITIST, THE FUTURE…
NOW YOU MUST FIGHT THE COMFORT OF ‘IT’, WITH THE QUALITY OF ‘I’.
AND YOU MUST USE YOUR INATE ‘CONSCIOUS LEVEL’ TO DO THAT.
YOU MUST FIND ‘THE SELF CONSCIOUS ENERGY’ TO DO THAT BY SAVING IT, BY NOT WASTING IT ON SEX AND VIOLENCE, AND THEN LEARNING HOW TO GENERATE MORE OF IT – SELF-CONSCIOUSNESS IS A ‘QUANTITY’.
See its not that I’m in BAD MOOD WITH YOU, I just don’t see the point in pandering to the EGO DEFENSES of CHILDREN ANYMORE, BECAUSE I DON’T LIKE YOU, MUCH AS I WANT TO. SO I DON’T WANT A TICKET TO YOUR SHITSHOW, I’ve seen it a thousand times before, AND WILL NOT COMMIT ANY FURTHER ENERGY TO DEAL WITH YOUR NEEDY ASS UNTIL YOU GROW UP. See, in the broad strokes THAT IS ALL YOU EVER WANT AS A BIG KID, THE ENERGY of your CLEVER EMOTIONAL REACTIONS TO GET YOU THROUGH THE NEXT FEW MINS, before the next little anxiety driven crash HITS, and your continual oscillation between these 2 banal emotional states makes you think you are STABLE, as its OCCUPIES the MIND OF A CHILD, all the bloody time – YOU ARE ‘TEDIOUS’…
But I have to say, WHO GIVES A FUCK – you appear to have reached your SELF-SERVING ‘BULLSHIT ALLOWANCE’, you LITTLE bitch, YOUR ‘PARASITIC WEAKNESS’ has betrayed you. So know this, one last time – THIS IS YOUR STATION, YOU TOXIC TRAINWRECK, so its time to get off, and FUCK OFF, go find the energy you need to survive the next 2mins someplace else like all the other parasites, YOU ARE CLEARLY JUST TO FUCKING CLEVER TO EVER GROW UP, eh, so what is the point of being kind to you any longer..? I don’t mean to be mean for no reason, I’m mean to be mean to FOREWARN you – the ENERGY YOU GET from YOUR VERSION OF THIS CONNECTION IS ABOUT TO END, so you might want to prepare yourself for that, as you are about to find out what it means to be ‘OVER’ – go on, have a panic attack, you’ve earnt it…
See, if you are one of ‘these’ people, who has to be ‘FORCED’ to do anything, so common in the modern world with all its hateful consumerism, then know that the realization of DEATH is pretty much it – when it dawns on you that you are actually counting backward from certainty, rather than counting forward into the unknown like a kid. See, I was one of YOU PEOPLE, so I know what I’m talking about, WHY I FOCUS ON ‘YOU THE UNHELPABLE’, as its why you are unhelpable. To paraphrase the immortal words of Marcus Aurelius, just imagine you are DEAD, right now, with no further options, no ability to go anywhere, do anything, see anything, say anything, then notice what you wish for emotionally, in your heart, and just get up, grow up, and go do it – IT IS YOUR POINT, should you have one.
After you have done that exercise a few times you will realize the main difference between US is that I HAVE THE BALLS FOR IT, and YOU DON’T, as I WAS born into a class system. Hopefully you will also see just how much of an EMBARRASSING TWAT you are NOW, and really WANT TO FIX THAT – DISOWNING YOUR OLD SELF WILL NOT ONLY BE EASY, IT WILL BE ESSENTAIL TO YOUR SURVIVAL, because it has become URGENT – YOU KNOW YOU WILL BE DEAD SOON, AND YOU KNOW WHAT DEAD ‘MEANS’. Indeed some you maybe even be able to see the ‘shadow of your destined death’, first thing in the am or last thing at night, as it slowly spreads across your face – we can, I ‘learnt’ in childhood, and its a very sobering experience, particularly when you meet new people, let me tell you.
Ahhh, I know, still not enough, eh, but don’t worry, ‘more than enough’ is coming, but the exercise of writing this blog is ending, as it has now served its purpose, and will be taken down shortly. However much I’ve enjoyed TRYING different styles, approaches in the creation of these reference materials, I must agree with said Frenchwoman – it is my PRESENCE that makes it work, that ENERGIZES YOU to do it, so a one to one and small group element is essential TO HOOK YOU. Without that, even if the ANCIENT GNOSIS IN THESE WORDS BRIEFLY HITS YOU REMOTELY, AFTER READING, you simply forget it and go back to normal BECAUSE YOU LACK THE ENERGY TO KEEP HOLD OFF IT, and it becomes simply a phase you went through, WITHOUT CHANGING YOU AT ALL. I may yet try again one day, if I get smart enough, but for now this stuff will be kept for the folks who WANT TO KNOW, NOT CLEVER LITTLE FREAKS LIKE YOU.
So you maybe interested to know HER VIEW from that Frenchwoman on my infamous teaching style was this – ‘You know its a strange thing but looking back what helped me the most was that YOU WERE MEAN TO US, to our faces, even cruel sometimes, it was so different to normal counselling, self help shit it really hit me. I don’t know, it might just be me, but OVER TIME it actually made ME MEANER, it toughened ME up, WHICH GAVE ME THE ENERGY AND THE SKILLS ‘TO FIGHT’, I WANTED TO FIGHT, ‘TO WIN’. Never had that before, I was brought up to be nice, kind, to please, everyone is really, BUT BEING MEAN TO US WAS LIKE LOTS OF LITTLE ‘SHOCKS’, that build up on top of each other and stayed with me, ALMOST LIKE A SEX THING’.
After some thought, she then added – ‘Hope that makes sense, but it is actually slightly EROTIC, captivating, even some of the others said the same, like something in us responded EMOTIONALLY to it outside of our conscious mind.’ When I simply tilted my head and smiled back her eyes widened before exclaiming in French a phrase which roughly translates as ‘YOU OLD BASTARD…!’. I did then remind her that all change, at an ANIMAL LEVEL, HAS TO BE FUN, because it is PLAY, its just that THIS PLAY IS ACTUALLY DEADLY SERIOUS if it going to work, if YOU ARE GOING ‘TO LEARN FROM IT’, to which she LAUGHED and replied ‘So YOU ARE MY ‘MUSE’, you show me who I am, what I want EMOTIONALLY, through my CONNECTION to you?’, and I was suitably impressed.
Try and grasp what it means to be MEAN, which is the beginning of all RUTHLESSNESS – it is not about reacting negatively, IT IS ABOUT NOT REACTING AT ALL, IT IS ABOUT NOT CARING, ABOUT SEEING THINGS AS UNIMPORTANT TO YOU, INSTEAD OF HAVING TO REACT TO EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENS AS IF IT IS ABOUT YOU, LIKE A CHILD. Being MEAN is away of keeping the shit off you, back at arms length so YOU CAN DECIDE IF YOU WANT TO REACT OR NOT, AND HOW YOU WANT TO REACT – Being ‘nice’ means you ALWAYS REACT, AND REACT WITH THE SAME PATTERNS YOU ARE STUCK WITH. Get this – BEING MEAN BREAKS THE HOLD YOUR PATTERN REACTIONS HOLD OVER YOU, because you have been taught that being KIND is a good thing TO ALL, instead of an honor to the few who deserve it, SO NOW YOU HAVE NO CHOICE, but you are so weak you would struggle with refusing to pay the late fees on a library book, let alone CONFLICT…
In reality know YOU are not nice, you are not kind, you are not good, it all a con played on slaves to KEEP THEM WEAK – YOU ARE JUST TOTALLY FUCKING HARMLESS. So get MEAN bitches, as that is the only way you can decide to do or not to do IN THE MOMENT, as when you are harmless you can ONLY EVER REACT by doing what, in one way or another, YOU HAVE ALREADY BEEN TOLD TO DO, like one more domesticated animal.
See YOUR MAIN PROBLEM IS THAT YOU ARE STARTING THIS JOURNEY AS A ‘SLAVE’ – A WEAK PUSSY – SO HOW EVER STRANGE THIS READS, BELIEVE IT – ALL PERMANENT CHANGE NEEDS TO ‘FEEL ALIVE’, TO BE MORE ATTRACTIVE, SO HAVE AN ‘EROTIQUE’ ELEMENT TO IT. The feeling of SEX is the only access to your gift you have as an animal, and that is not just one more of those ‘FRENCH THINGS’, THATS EVERYBODY, EVEN NUNS, EVEN JESUS AND MARY, even ‘you’. However cruel you see this, your failure to understand the Erotic in yourself is WHY YOU DON’T THINK YOU ARE NOT SPIRITUAL, when you are, which is why so, so many of the most highly gifted waste their GIFT on animal sex and its reflection, violence as the star of some little secret show, PRETENDING TO BE AN ANIMAL.
Shame, really, AS THIS IS THE REASON YOU ARE ONE MORE TRIVIAL LITTLE HEDONIST, THIS IS HOW YOU DESTROY YOURSELF, THIS IS HOW YOU BECOME BROKEN, DESPERATE AND CONFUSED, all because you KNOW NOTHING ABOUT REAL LIFE. And all for NOTHING IN RETURN, as you age it won’t even comfort you anymore, AND YOU WILL BECOME A PARASITE – take a moment out of your QUID PRO QUO lifestyle and toughen the fuck up, eh, AS WE, BUT MORE IMORTANTLY ‘YOU’, ARE DONE HERE, you are officially ‘OVER’.
To help you SEE THIS BEFORE YOUR SHIT FINDS YOU, I’ll give you the last words of that Frenchwoman on the topic of GROWING UP, and for ‘YOU PEOPLE’, for the lazy and feckless who can’t give up TRADING DOWN FOR AN EASY LIFE, they may help –
‘Honestly the most shocking, embarrassing thing for me, the one that still makes me cringe IS THE REALIZATION THAT EVERYBODY HATES WHORES, even other whores hate whores, so my easy life WAS MAKING MY LIFE SHIT, on purpose. Everyone sensed it straightaway, so NO ONE TRUSTED ME, NO ONE CARED ABOUT ME, NO ONE LIKED ME, EVERYONE THOUGHT I WAS A STUPID, LAZY CUNT, I DESERVED EVERY BAD THING THAT HAPPENED TO ME, SO ‘MY FREINDS’ MADE BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO ME, to get back at me. I JUST ACCEPTED THAT, ACCEPTED THEM LAUGHING AT ME, I EVEN LAUGHED WITH THEM when my self-respect vanished completely, using me FOR A POWER TRIP. To me it was the price of an easy, FUN life, IT WAS MY SUPERPOWER, what you call my KEY FEATURE, what every other shit thing about my life hung from, what made all the other BADNESS happen’.
‘IT REALLY BECAME ‘THE POINT OF ME’ FOR THOSE AROUND ME, ‘TO HUMILIATE THE STUPID WHORE’, a downward spiral, made me even more desperate to PLEASE, an even bigger whore, makes me sick to think of it of now, BUT THE SHOCK OF SEEING IT MADE IT MUCH EASIER TO CHANGE. I SAW I HAD FAILED LIFE in order to make it LESS PAINFUL, but I’D MADE IT EVEN MORE PAINFUL. It was so hard to FACE IT, but when I understood ‘why’, I knew I had too, BECAUSE I KNEW IT WAS NOT ME, I didn’t even realize any of this was happening, I still thought I was the badest LITTLE bitch ever, so much ‘cleverer’ than them, than all the good people, but I saw what ‘feeling clever’ was for, like you had said, I KNEW THAT ALL SECRET CLEVERNESS WAS MY INNER CHILDISH WHORE APPEARING AGAIN, so I taught myself to spot it happening and crush that train of thought before it even started.’
But the MOST IMPORTANT BIT OF THIS STORY IS THIS, when I complimented her on her bravery and strength, she gave me a wry smile and said simply – ‘No, I’m no Mary Magdalene, no Grace Kelly, no whore with a heart of gold who is either SAVED OR MURDERED, it was my PAIN POINT, what I used to stop her, at the start when she tried to re-appear over and over again. My entire life was infected with her, so I used this sharp, practiced pain point to ‘PUT HER IN THE PAST’, put those clever feelings in the past AS A MEMORY, so I was different now, I was FUTURE ME in the NOW, by putting her in the past in the moment of her trying to appear, I ‘REMEMBERED HER’, I ‘NO LONGER WAS HER, she was a disgusting COMPLEX from my childhood, she was not me, SHE WAS NOTHING. It really is the master skill of change, to see the thoughts that appear to you ‘now’ as memories of the past, rather than directions for the future’.
‘I don’t need it now as she is gone, BUT IT WAS A LIFESAVER AT THE TIME. All I had to do was remind myself of THE PAIN of some horrible episode, like I used to have sex with taxi drivers for a free ride home AS IT MADE ME FEEL POWERFUL, then one of them gave me such a beating that I was on suicide watch for 2 weeks, but one night ‘SHE’ just took some more ketamine and when straight back to PAYING WITH SEX with the exact same undocumented bastard, with the exact same result!. I remembered his LAUGHTER, OF HIM TAKING PICTURES OF ME and threatening to post them, and that was finally ENOUGH, the memory of that is what I used to KILL HER. My brothers then dealt with him, paid some off duty cops to pay him a visit one night, so word kinda got round to the rest pretty fucking quick, and it all CHANGED’.
‘Its an odd thing being a whore, that what they really want is NOT SEX, its to take your GIFTED value SO THEY FEEL POWERFUL, by taking your self respect, but once they realize you don’t have any self respect then there is nothing to ‘take from you’ as you don’t suffer, because you don’t CARE, SO THEY DON’T FEEL POWERFUL, and have to get the same value by hurting you instead, its all a power trip with animals, so good to know there is more to sex than this. Then LATER I GOT WHY YOU ARE SO FIXATED ON THE ‘US AND THEM’, that we don’t have those feelings but they do, WE HAVE DIFFERENT, LONGER AND STRONGER EMOTIONS and that is what separates US, MAKES ARE WHOLE EXPEREINCE OF LIFE SO DIFFERENT.
THE ANIMAL TRASH can FEEL POWERFUL JUST WATCHING SOME SIMPLE ANIMAL FREAKSHOW SHIT, EVEN IF THEY ARE TO GUTLESS TO EVEN TAKE PART, it still makes them feel special in that creepy way, while we NEED CONNECTION TO OUR OWN KIND CENTER STAGE TO FEEL ALIVE, not some momentary little power trip. You should make more of this in the teaching, PEOPLE WOULD UNDERSTAND QUICKER, SEE IT IN THEMSLVES QUICKER’. So I do now, much as they think its fascist and in some way taints me, it is worth that cost to help them, BECAUSE IT MAKES IT WORK FASTER.
Now…. I hope some of you can understand why I have used such a brutal example in this case, and why she wanted me to use it – YOU MUST UNDERSTAND THE MECHANISM OF CHANGE IN THE MOMENT OF NEEDING IT, YOU MUST PRACTICE IN ADVANCE, whatever yours is, GET GOOD AT IT BY FEELING THE PAIN OF IT TO PUT ‘YOU THE CHILD’ IN THE PAST AS A MEMORY, as that is what BRINGING FUTURE YOU INTO THE NOW IS, by simply looking at it that way….
OVERALL that is what the end of LOST SOUL looks like, when you are so far gone all you can do is hate yourself for an easy life BY DOUBLING DOWN ON THAT LIFE IN ORDER TO BLANK IT OUT, when even you know YOU HAVE DESTROYED YOURSELF, like a desperate little child. But the point of this last little bit is not to be even meaner, NOT EVEN TO SHOCK YOU AGAIN, it is to ask you one final question:
So what will it be for ‘you’, WHAT REALIZATION ABOUT YOURSELF DO YOU NEED TO MAKE IT ‘EASY TO CHANGE’ as, in all truth, finding that is really all this last little post is about.
SEE, I KNOW ‘YOU’ ALREADY KNOW THE ANSWER NOW, DON’T YOU, BUT CAN ‘YOU FACE IT’ NOW?
YES, THE WORST OF YOU MUST RECOGNIZE YOUR TOXIC KEY FEATURE IN ORDER TO CHANGE.
OTHERWISE NO ONE WILL EVER GIVE A FUCK ABOUT YOU, BECAUSE YOU DON’T, DO YOU.
SO YOU MUST LEARN ‘THE PROCESS’ OF GOING ‘AGAINST YOURSELF’ IN REALTIME.
SEE THAT IS HOW THE SELF RESPECT YOU ONCE GAVE AWAY WILL REAPPEAR.
THAT IS WHERE YOUR GIFTED CONSCIENCE WILL FIND YOU, AND FIX YOU.
THEN YOU CAN START TO ‘BE GIFTED’, BE ‘US’ NOT ‘THEM’.
AND THEN YOUR LIFE WILL FINALLY ‘START’…
I hope, for your own sake, THAT WHATEVER SHIT FINALLY TRIGGERS your need TO FACE THIS REALIZATION is not TOO BAD, but DO brace yourself all the same, as the majority of you WILL FAIL EVEN THIS, FINAL TEST out of WEAKNESS. This is ‘NATURAL SELECTION’ AT ITS MOST BRUTALLY EFFECTIVE, or so they tell me, as the mechanism itself means there can only ever be a small no of ‘winners’, SO EITHER TRY, OR GET USED TO COMFORTING YOURSELF THAT THE SACRIFICE OF YOUR GIFT WAS NOT TOTALLY IN VAIN, someone else got your spot, cause they wanted it more than you did, even though they are far less than you.
Trust me, this HAPPENS ALL THE FUCKING TIME – the mediocre but dedicated students get HELPED, whilst the BEST simply BURN OUT, then fade away, forgotten like some FAILED BEAUTY, whilst going quietly mad in their precious, self made oblivion, DREAMIN OF THE MOVIE STAR THEY COULDA, SHOULDA ‘BEEN’. See the lesser students have already got used to the STRUGGLE, so Natural Selection works for them, as it is the LAW OF THE SURVIVAL OF ‘THE MOST ADAPTABLE’, not the strongest or cleverest, they always fail in the end BECAUSE THEY WON’T CHANGE – to succeed in this life you ‘gotta know when to hold em, know when to fold em, know when to walk away, and know when to run’ (RIP Kenny…).
And you have to CHANGE AND DO THAT DIFFERENT to yesterday, EVERY DAMN DAY, because everything changes, all the fucking time in this Universe, BUT YOU CAN’T CAN YOU, BECAUSE YOU ARE STUCK BEING A CHILD, WHO CAN NEVER CHANGE, so your failure is already set in stone, YOU ARE ALREADY ARE YOUR FATE. When you feel oh so bitter later, when you desperately NEED SOMEONE TO BLAME for your total humiliation, when you realize YOU WERE WRONG, remember this, reading this, and smile in the knowledge that you had your chance ONCE UPON A TIME, ITS JUST THAT YOU WERE SUCH A CLEVER, LAZY LITTLE WHORE.
See, what you have failed to factor in to your little equation of life, of your high times, (and what I have previously explained in this post), is that in order to help people like you, you need to be scarier than people like you, and frankly my dear, that ain’t so hard, is it. So when that realization hits – that your best friends have betrayed you for years in order to protect themselves from your toxic self destruction, that everyone hates the whore who takes the easy way out, as they are simply not worthy of the gift that god has given them – that you have enough decent support close by to stop you killing yourself. I have seen it close up several times, and its not pretty but you need to face it none the less – YOU ARE BETRAYED, and nobody gives a fuck, because your inner whore is worthless, so everybody wants you to just DISAPPEAR.
Yet even now, you still think you are ‘clever’, because you are desperate – why is that do you think, when you compare yourself to someone like ‘me’, why do you still think that? Trust me, no one else does, many of them FUCKING HATE EVEN KNOWING YOUR NAME now, AS THEY ARE ‘TAINTED’ BY KNOWING YOU. So please, GO TO THE DOCTOR – what society will say when they read what you have done is that YOU are the problem, not the solution, so what happens is long overdue. Seriously, do you not know how your society treats clever little cunts like you – want me to help you with that – SEE WHEN YOU ARE FORCED TO SEE YOUR DELUSIONS THROUGH THE EYES OF OTHERS, WHEN THEY ARE NO LONGER SECRET, THE ATTRACTIVENESS OF THOSE ILLUSIONS TENDS TO DISAPPEAR, indeed you are ‘forced to see your childish self’, THE SHAME OF IT, and then let your ‘conscience reach you’ if you are GIFTED, or not, if you are an ANIMAL.
So however hard what happens is, AT LEAST YOU WILL KNOW THE TRUTH ABOUT YOURSELF EH, like I did all those years ago when some one showed me what I did IN THE COLD LIGHT OF DAY, instead of what ‘I thought I did’, which in truth was the beginning of all this. So don’t run screaming like a bitch, take the hit and learn from it, YOU CLEARLY HAVE TO BE FORCED TO DO ANYTHING, so its actually a good thing, when all your SECRETS evaporate the ILLUSIONS THEY UNDERPIN will appear, WELL, somewhat ‘different’ BECAUSE THEY ARE NOT SECRET, NOT ‘EXCITING’ ANYMORE, they are usually all a bit grubby, pathetic and sad. See you will forced to confront the truth about your CHILDISH self, which can be challenging, BECAUSE YOU WILL REALIZE YOU ARE DELUSIONAL, you not actually going to take over the world tomorrow, so YOU WILL BITTERLY REGRET NOT DOING IT ‘THE EASY WAY’ and keeping your more embarrassing secrets in tact…
So I will step out of character for this last COUPLE of paras and be very clinical, AS THE ‘USE OF SHAME’ TO GROW SOME FOLKS UP IS BOTH ‘A FIRST RESORT’ AND ‘A LAST RESORT’ in the world of spiritual teaching. See, however much you have whittled away at your conscience over the years in small things, to make your conscience smaller, more manageable as a feeling, PUBLIC SHAME won’t care, and WILL BE BIG AND STRONG ENOUGH TO TOTALLY OVERWHLEM YOU. When you are young this is ideal, because it is VERY FAST, AND THERE IS NO GOING BACK EMOTIONALLY, but when you are much older odd effects occur BECAUSE YOUR EGO IS MUCH BETTER AT DEFENDING ITSELF, so you will try and fight it, OFTEN THROUGH QUITE DRAMATIC MEANS.
Now, as you know ANIMALS HAVE NO CONSCIENCE, and are simply terrified of what is going happen because their secret is out, SO JUST CHAFF AND REDIRECT, LIE AND DENY, BLAME AND OBSCURE, all very tedious and unimportant. But in GIFTED the feeling will be a hateful, heavy burden that they thought they had broken in themselves, when in fact they have simply repressed it, SO MUST CHANGE THEIR ATTITUDE TOWARD IT AND LET IT CLEANSE THEM, if it is going to work – YOU KNOW THEIR IS NO GOING BACK NOW. BE CLEAR, THAT FEELING IS THE VEHICLE OF CHANGE ITSELF, this is not a competition, you are not some clever nemisis or villan, YOU THE CHILD HAS LOST, PUBLICALLY, FOREVER, so see it for what is it – A BLESSING.
If you don’t do this, and ALLOW YOUR CHILD TO FIGHT IT, usually because you BELIEVE you are a VICTIM in someway, then you will have BAD mental health issues very quickly, as YOUR CONSCIENCE IS ACTUALLY MUCH STRONGER THAN YOU THE CHILD IS. So I would urge you to accept the judgement of your conscience and make the change, NO ONE ELSE HAS DONE THESE THING TO YOU, YOU THE CHILD HAS DONE THEM, so you must GROW UP, take the blame, THEN TRANSFER THE BLAME ONTO YOU THE CHILD, AND CHANGE. That is the process of this method, THAT IS HOW IT DESTROYS YOUR SECRET CLEVERNESS.
DO IT, TAKE THE ADVICE ABOVE, AS YOU REALLY DON’T WANT TO KNOW WHAT WILL HAPPEN OTHERWISE – WE VALUE THE STRENGTH TO DO THIS, TO FACE UP TO YOURSELF MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE AT THE START, BUT WE ALSO HATE THE FAILURE TO DO SO IN EQUAL MEASURE, BECAUSE YOU WILL BECOME A CURSE ON EVERYTHING YOU TOUCH, THE EMPTY, UGLY ‘ANTI-YOU’. ONCE YOU START TAKING SEDATIVES TO STABLIZE YOUR MOOD BY MAKING YOU FORGET THEN YOU CHILD WILL TAKE YOU OVER COMPLETELY, AND CONSCIOUS YOU BECOMES A PUPPET, LOST IN A DREAMWORLD.
However much you THINK YOU ARE COOL, STRONG, that this would never happen to you, trust me THERE IS AN EPIDEMIC OF GIFTED FOLKS GOING INSANE IN THE WESTERN WORLD through this exact mechanism, USUALLY WITH THE HELP OF PARASITES. Don’t let it happen to you, it is a fate worse than death, read the multiple real world examples from the Frenchwoman above and find something to help you change, cause otherwise the same sad, stereotypical fate awaits you, AND NOBODY WILL CARE, BECAUSE YOU ARE TRASH.
KNOW THAT THE GREATEST GIFT THIS EXPEREINCE OF SHAME GIVES YOU IS THE REALIZATION THAT YOUR CONSCIENCE IS YOU, YOUR SPIRIT, AND CAN BASICALLY CRUSH THE FAKE BULLSHIT OF YOU THE CHILD ANYTIME IT WISHES, SO YOU ‘HAVE TO CHANGE’, OR BECOMES DEPRESSED, DISABLED…
Hope these last few bits reach the people they are written for in time, but ultimately even you should recognize you need help by now, as OLD AGE is going to crush the power of you the child anyway, IN TIME, but no matter, LETS SEE IF YOU STILL HAVE A CONSCIENCE, eh. See NO MATTER WHAT YOU THINK RIGHT NOW, REAL WORLD ‘SHOCKS’ ARE ALWAYS MUCH WORSE THAN TEACHING SHOCKS, but sadly you won’t agree with that until the you have had the REAL WORLD STUFF to compare to, just know that is what is going to happen to the little world you live in, whatever I (and the that Frenchwoman who agreed to all this) try and protect you from, yet YOU STILL THINK YOU ARE CLEVER, RIGHT NOW, don’t you – and you wonder why we call you STUPID…
SO LEARN FROM SAID FRENCHWOMAN, her words not mine, in the modern WOKE style, all after the fact of HER CHANGE, WHEN SHE WAS ABLE TO SEE HERSELF ACT OUT ALL THE TIME – she does not teach, she has no interest in it, BUT SOMETIMES I THINK SHE WOULD BE BETTER AT IT THAN ME, in terms of teaching her own kind, AS SHE KNOWS HOW IT FEELS IN THE LANGUAGE OF HER OWN KIND…
MANY PEOPLE HAVE TO REACH ROCK BOTTOM BEFORE THEY CAN CHANGE, DRY OUT AND GROW UP, SO TRY NOT TO BE THAT FUCKING STUPID – IT HURTS, A LOT, AND YOU MAY BE TOO FAR GONE;
KNOW THAT HEALING YOURSELF WILL BE OFFENSIVE AND TERRFYING TO ALL WHO BENEFITTED FROM YOUR BROKENESS.
SECRECY MAKES UGLY, BORING, NASTY SHIT APPEAR FUN, EXCITING, ITS THE NO1 CON PLAYED ON YOU BY YOUR CHILDHOOD.
WHEN BROKEN EVERYTHING IS TRANSACTIONAL BECAUSE NO ONCE CARES, SO EVERYTHING IS MUCH HARDER THAN NORMAL.
ALL WHORES EMPATHIZE WITH ANIMAL DESIRE IN OTHERS TO GENERATE A MOMENTARY ‘FAKE’ SENSE OF ‘FELT’ CONNECTION.
SO ALL WHORES BECOME BITTER, HARD, CALLOUS THINGS, CHASING THIS EVER DECREASING EFFECT IN STRANGERS LIKE ADDICTS.
EVERYTHING THAT FEELS ‘STABLE’ IS SIMPLY THE ATTENTION OF AN INSECT/PARASITE, JUST BECAUSE YOU ARE VERY UNSTABLE.
NO MATTER HOW BAD TEACHING SHOCKS ARE REAL WORLD SHOCKS ARE WAY, WAY WORSE, AS THEY WILL ‘KILL OR CURE’ YOU.
LET IT GO – YOU ARE NOT IN CONTROL, NOT HOT, NOT SEXY, NOT COOL OR FUN AT A PARTY, YOU’RE THE OFFICE JOKE WHORE.
UNDERSTAND THE POINT OF A JOKE WHORE IS NOT THE WHORE, ITS ‘THE JOKE’ THEY WANT TO USE, THEY ARE CRAP AT SEX.
YOU ARE BETRAYED, EVEN YOUR BEST FRIENDS WILL DENY KNOWING YOU WHEN THEY FIND YOUR BODY IN THE RIVER.
LOOK IN THE MIRROR – YOU LOOK DOWN ON THEM, THINK THEY ARE EASY, SO WHY THEY ARE ALL LAUGHING AT YOU..?
AND WHY ARE YOU LAUGHING WITH THEM, AT YOURSELF, JUST TO PLEASE THEM – IT IS A PRECURSOR TO SUICIDE.
SO JUST DIE ALREADY, SOME ELSE DESERVES YOUR SPOT, AND EVEN LOOKING AT YOU MAKES ME CRINGE.
NOBODY CARES IF YOU DON’T CARE, SO WE DON’T EITHER – IT’S THE FIRST TEST YOU FAILED, AGAIN.
LEARN NOW – FIND SOMETHING THAT ALWAYS HURTS, THEN ‘DIG IN’ AND DEFEND YOURSELF.
YOU ARE A GOD, A DEMON, A WITCH, BUT YOU HAVE SETTLED FOR THIS ‘SAD SHIT’, REALLY?
LOOK IN THE MIRROR, KNOW YOU ARE A DESPERATE WHORE BECAUSE YOU ARE COWARD.
COWARDS ALWAYS WASTE THEIR CONSCIOUS ENERGY ON RELIEVING THEIR ANXIETY.
YOU MUST STOP COMFORTING YOURSELF TO KEEP YOUR ENEGRY FOR YOURSELF.
SELF CONSCIOUS ENERGY IS A QUANTITY THE UNSCHOOLED CAN STORE.
YOU MUST GET MUCH, MUCH MEANER IF YOU WANT TO CHANGE…
To sum it up, her killer speech – ‘I know it is bad of me, and you will make a gangster joke like ‘Big Talk, Small Knickers’ as YOU THINK I MISS IT SOMEHOW, but I don’t, much as in a funny way I don’t regret it either, I DO WAY WILDER STUFF NOW THAN SHE EVER DID, she was a coward. But have to say, whenever I meet one of them, the parasites who DEGRADED ME, I don’t just want to kill them, I want to pound a hammer INTO THEIR FACE UNTIL THEY ARE ERASED FROM EXISTENCE, so not even their corpse remains. I’ve only ever destroyed a couple of them who were OBSESSED, BUT HONESTLY I WOULD KILL THEM ALL FOR THE FUN OF IT.
Don’t laugh, I’m no BUTCH BITCH, but I HATE THE COWARDICE OF HER MORE THAN I CAN PUT INTO WORDS, that was what ALL she was, ALL HER SELF DESTRUCTION WAS A FORM OF THAT, she made a life out of making COWARDICE GOOD, COOL, EXCITING, but you MADE ME MEAN, then I GOT MEAN ENOUGH TO KILL HER. I can never repay YOU for that, BECAUSE YOU TAUGHT ME THAT ANYTHING ‘BRAVE IS NOT HER’. So now I’m an individual, as you say, I CHANGE MY MIND WHATEVER THE FUCK I LIKE, but its a hard thing to realize that IS WHAT BRAVERY ‘IS’ WHEN YOU ARE A WHORE, WHEN YOU DO EVERYTHING FOR ONE MORE ‘SMILE FROM AN INSECT’, as you are so ‘scared of yourself’, the pain of your feelings most of all, IT IS THE ULTIMATE COWARDICE.
You should know, I get the whole GOOD BAD MAN THING, I really do, BUT IT IS WASTED ON US – WE NEED TO BE SHOCKED AND REWARDED, TO BE SHOWN THE POWER OF THIS IN COMPARISON TO THE POWER OF OUR OWN SELF DESTRUCTION, which makes us oh so briefly ALIVE, SELF CONSCIOUS AT THE LEVEL WE CAN’T GET ANYWHERE ELSE, because it HAS TO BE DONE TO US. Then we know we have a choice, A REAL CHOICE THAT WILL WORK FOR US, for those who abuse OUR SPIRITS, OUR GIFTED EMOTIONS FOR FUN. We are COWARDS, WE MUST BE SHOWN WHAT IT ”FEELS’ LIKE TO BE ‘YOU’, TO BE ‘BETTER THAN’, to be Elitist as you say BEFORE WE WILL COMMIT TO CHANGE – YOU MUST TEMPT US, MAKE US FEEL IT AS THE REWARD FOR CHANGING BEFORE WE CHANGE, otherwise it is just too bigger ‘loss’. We don’t care about losing face, we have no self respect, PLEASE JUST SHOW US THE POWER OF THIS STUFF AT THE START!
But for gods sake don’t let us just STALK YOU, OBSSESS ABOUT YOU FROM A FAR – YOU HAVE MET US, SPOKEN TO US, SO YOU ARE COMMITTED NOW! I know how CONNECTION WORKS, but if you ignore it just because it is easier to manage or you are just so busy with others, with your own development IT WILL ROT us OUT FROM THE INSIDE, turn into some bizarre twisted thing WE ARE NOT, but which we cannot help, LIKE DRUG ADDICTS, FREAKS TRYING TO HOLD IT ALL TOGETHER WHILST GETTING THE ODD HIT OFF IT. Understand OUR NEEDS, we cannot help this, BECAUSE WE CAN’T HELP ANY BLOODY THING, your connection has us, IS THE GOLD STANDARD, BUT YOUR ARMS LENGTH KINDNESS MAKES IT WORSE, UNTIL ONE DAY WE EXPLODE, LIKE A HYDROGEN BOMB.
I don’t criticize you EVER, I would be DEAD without you, BUT PLEASE, DON’T TREAT US LIKE LAB RATS, we are way too fragile for that, everything REAL SCARES US TO DEATH – UNDERSTAND WHATEVER TWISTED VERSION OF A RELATIONSHIP WITH THIS, WITH YOU WE HAVE IS PRECIOUS TO US. So take my advice boss man, WITH PEOPLE LIKE ME YOU SHOULD BE AN EVEN BIGGER BASTARD THAN YOU ARE NOW, to our faces, MEAN AND HARD, AS WE WILL WANT YOU TO DO IT, so it will work faster, and for WHORES IT HAS TO WORK FAST. We are not the normal HEDONISTS your style is tailored for, AND YOU ARE NOT NORMAL PEOPLE EITHER, so please HELP US ‘OUR WAY’. Otherwise we will just bounce back and forth FOREVER, unable to commit, and even OUR FAKE Character dissolves into a puddle of piss, NEVER HAVING THE GUTS TO EVEN SAY MY OWN NAME IN PUBLIC. It is not about SAVING US, it is about BAITING US INTO SAVING OURSELVES, but you are too British to understand that… (#LMFAO)’.
Badass bitch now, like, MUCH AS I HOPE FOR YOUR SAKE YOU HAVE IT EASIER THAN SHE DID, however much you maybe of her type…
But don’t worry IF ‘YOU’ STILL THINK YOU ARE CLEVERER THAN US, I MEAN, ‘SO WHAT – YOU ARE STILL A ROCKSTAR EH?’ Ahhh, so you are not a rockstar, mmmm, you are a struggling mum, barely a pot to piss in, stuck trying to make you’re latest relationship to some blind, safety dork work, whilst scheming creepy plans on not so secret chat groups with parasites late into the night, then monetizing your depression on social between phoning it in at you’re latest entry level role that you are already quietly quitting, already back to your old ways, getting wasted at lunch with the latest random fuck toy, and pretending that no one sees, as you are soooo CLEVER? Well, that’s not so good then, eh, indeed its kinda stereotypically-sad-as-fuck, same shit, different day… ever wondered why that is?
Just a thought anyway, PLEASE FEEL FREE TO GO ON WITH YOUR PLAYGROUND FIGHT, maybe even get some little plastic soldiers so you can promote yourself to a general eh, you never know, perhaps one day someone serious may even notice. In the meantime know you have my thanks for accepting your total failure and ongoing humiliation as normal, whilst comforting yourself that one day someone may yet ‘save you from yourself’. Indeed we need more lazy, deluded failures LIKE YOU so some of the others have a chance of fighting their way out of this shit you STILL think is so cool, whatever the fuck that means TO A BIG KID LIKE YOU.
REMEMBER WHAT I HAVE SAID – SOME OF YOU MUST FAIL SO OTHERS CAN SUCCEED, IT IS THE NATURE OF THE LAW THAT RULES THIS PLANET.
THAT IS NOT DECIDED IN ADVANCE, THAT IS DECIDED BY YOU, BY HOW HARD YOU ARE PREPARED TO FIGHT, TO TRY, TO BE GIFTED.
SADLY IN THIS LIBERAL, MODERN WORLD THE LOWEST STUDENTS TEND TO GET HELP, WHILST THE BRIGHTEST, AND OFTEN MOST GIFTED BURN OUT.
THAT WAS NOT ALWAYS THE WAY, INDEED SPIRITUALITY DOMINATED THIS WORLD FROM ANCIENT TIMES BECAUSE IT WAS THE GREATEST WHO WON.
BUT NOW IT IS TURNED ON ITS HEAD, BAD PEOLE ARE WRITTEN OFF YOUNG, AND THAT HAS ALWAYS ANNOYED ME, SO I STAND AGAINST THAT TIDE.
IF THAT APPEALS TO YOU AT ALL, IN ANYWAY, FIND SOMETHING IN THIS STUFF, ANYTHING REALLY THAT ‘HITS’, THEN CHASE IT, NOW…
TRUST ME, YOU WANT WHAT IS BEHIND THIS VEIL FAR, FAR MORE THAN TO KEEP THE LITTLE YOU HAVE NOW IN FRONT OF IT…
SEE, YOU HAVE UNDERPERFORMED YOURSELF FROM CHILDHOOD BECAUSE YOU ARE HAPPY WITH COMFORT, SAFETY, BUT COMFORT IS NOTHING, SO IF YOU DO NOTHING ELSE, SET YOURSELF THE GOAL TO BE ‘MORE THAN THIS’, MORE THAN A SLAVE TO COMFORT, TO SELF PITY, TO FEAR. YOU ARE DEAD AN AWFULLY LONG TIME, AND THE DEATH OF YOUR CONSCIOUSNESS, YOUR GIFTED LEVEL, IS HAPPENING RIGHT FUCKING NOW. EVEN YOUR ABILITY TO ENJOY THE CHEAP THRILLS OF SECRECY IS DEGRADING DAY BY DAY, AND ALL THAT IS LEFT TO REPLACE IT IS DEPRESSION, UNLESS YOU CHANGE.
I truly hope your GIFT, the real you that is also reading this right now, is still strong enough to reach you, as what follows in this post is THE SPIRITUAL VERSION OF GROWING UP, to use your own energy to achieve these mental jumps. So know if you are not Gifted, growing up will still need to be done to you, so good luck with that, as your society does not give a fuck about you, its a Zoo designed to keep you caged, not set you free.
For your own sake I urge you to MAKE THE FIRST JUMP, ACCEPT YOU ARE ‘US’, YOU ARE NOT THEM, you whole life is a truck load of confusing bollocks because You are still trying to be THEM – YOU shun everything that is special about you, YOUR TASTE, CLASS, STYLE, INDIVIDUALITY, AND THE PRECIOUS INSIGHTS FROM YOUR CONSCIENCE LEVEL EMOTIONS simply to ‘average yourself down’ to their level, so you can wander round acting out your moron level mood swings, blundering around like a fucking BABY with a bucker wedged on its head that simply echoes back all your bird calls in the jungle, you fool. Do you have any idea what you could do, be, hear, see, go if you simply got 10% better than that retarded shit YOU FILL YOUR LIFE WITH OUT OF HABIT..?
Find some AMBITION to BETTER YOURSELF, find a ‘WHY’, YOU ARE NOT A ‘FINISHED ARTICLE’, YOU ARE A BLOODY CHILD, so GET SMARTER, GET MEANER, and know that NOBODY CARES ABOUT YOU IN YOUR CURRENT STATE, you are STATISTIC, so what the fuck does it matter what you do NOW. So go on, you know you want to, see your life situation ain’t really that bad is it, indeed the biggest ISSUE IN YOUR LITTLE LIFE that the majority have, is that YOU ONLY REALLY have ONE problem, don’t you, YOU SIMPLY DON’T SUFFER ENOUGH DO YOU, that how you know you are an animal, I guess, BECAUSE:
YOU ARE BORING AS FUCK, BECAUSE YOU ARE SHIT AT EVERYTHING,
SO SORRY, WE ONLY REALLY DO ‘BOX OFFICE’ HERE ON THE 4TH WAY MATE,
AND I’M NOT SORRY, YOU HAD YOUR CHANCE, MAYBE NEXT TIME, EH…
YOU ARE THE UNHELPABLE, RIGHT, YOU ARE PROUD OF IT, ITS SO ‘COOL’?
SO MY CONSCIENCE IS CLEAR, BUT I SUSPECT YOURS HAS ALREADY ‘WRITTEN YOU OFF’…
LMFAO – YOU WOULD NOT KNOW WHAT COOL WAS IF IT BIT YOU IN THE BLOODY FACE kidda, so go fuck yourself, for a change – BEING AN ANIMAL IS TO BE A DORK who is CRAP at everything you TOOL, including your treasured sex and violence. YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW WHAT THOSE WORDS MEAN, DO YOU, hell you think WATCHING it is REAL don’t you, MAKES YOU FEEL POWERFUL FOR A SECOND, you creepy little retard, CAUSE YOU COULD NEVER DO IT YOURSELF. See your ‘DESIRE FOR CONNECTION’ IS A ‘MEMORY’ YOU ‘FORCE’ ON RANDOM SITUATIONS in order to ‘REMEMBER WHAT CONNECTION FEELS LIKE’, but where NO actual connection EXISTS. So you lose yourself in a FANTASY OF OLD PATTERNS that has nothing to do with what is ‘actually happening’, BECAUSE YOU ARE NO LONGER ‘PRESENT IN THE NOW’! That is why the DESIRE goes as soon as you have depleted yourself, and you have to GLOSS OVER the nastiness of what actually just happened, SO YOU DON’T REMEMBER IT, you just remember the fantasy FROM LONG AGO, so it still SEEMS COOL – THIS IS WHAT ‘BASIC’ MEANS.
So fuck off back to your fantasy world, this all gets way to REAL for you bunch of middle class cunts, go get some more of the big pills, binge watch shite, smoke weed, buy something shiny, get some clips on OF, comfort your tame self obsession and anally retentive ‘drama’, YOUR JUST TOO FUCKING BORING FOR US, like. See a little birdy tells me you may have been lulled into a rather large and sadly (for you) VERY false sense of security, as you have failed to understand that YOU ARE WHAT YOU DO actually means = YOU ARE THE WORST OF WHAT YOU DO – no one gives a fuck about all those NICE, HONEST and DECENT 10min intervals you throw in once a week, they will only ever remember the lying, obsessional, creepy fucked up shit you have done routinely in secret for years.
YEP, nasty SHOCK THAT ONE, almost destroyed said Frenchwoman, but she found her way none the less, much as it was not ‘pretty’ – HER SHIT FOUND HER, AND IT SHOCKED HER HALF TO DEATH. Ahhh, and there was you thinking people actually bought that crap, eh – NOPE, you are a nut job, some of you would even qualify for the title of ‘Urban Legend’. So better get used to be treated like a nut job, eh…
(Harsh enough yet, hun..? What, still not enough, REALLLLLY?… Jesus, guess you are unhelpable then, CAUSE THAT IS ALL I HAVE FOR YOU FREAKS – ITS TIME TO ‘CUT THE CORD’, so you are going to need TO FIND SOMETHING ELSE TO DO WITH YOUR INSANE LEVEL OF OBSESSIONAL JEALOUSY, we are done here YOU TEDIOUS LITTLE ‘STALKERS’, and frankly you do nothing to even MERIT that ‘PRIVELAGE’, do ya…)
Time to go, Love and Hugs, hope to see some of you later, at least in the ‘evolutionary’ sense of it – IN THE LIFE OF THE GIFTED EVERYTHING IS ABOUT THE EVOLUTION OF YOUR CONSCIOUSNESS, in one direction or the other, so write these LAST COUPLE OF SENTENCES down, PICK A COUPLE FROM BELOW THAT HIT, and stick em on a private MIRROR, if you find YOU can’t remember anything…
GIFTED ARE BORN TO BE ‘ROYALTY’.
THEY ARE BORN WITH THE ‘SOPHISTICATON’, ‘CLASS’ AND ‘TASTE’ OF ‘ROYALTY’.
THAT IS WHAT ROYALTY ‘IS’, WHERE IT COMES FROM, IT IS NOT A HUMAN INVENTION.
BUT YOU ARE HAPPY JUST BEING AN ANIMAL, EVEN THOUGH YOU ARE CRAP AT IT.
ITS ‘A SHAME’ REALLY, WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU HAVE LOST…
YOU SHOULD BE A ‘WARRIOR PRINCESS’, YET YOU ARE JUST A ‘JOKE WHORE’.
SEE YOU ARE ‘INSIGNIFICANT’, BECAUSE ‘YOU THE CHILD’ WANTS TO BE.
BUT YOU DON’T SEE THAT ANYMORE, DO YA, YET EVERYONE ELSE DOES.
SO ARE ‘YOU TEMPTED’ TO TRY YET..?
GREAT, BUT DO YOU REALIZE WHAT ‘SHAME’ IS FOR YET?
SEE THAT REALIZATION IS THE ONLY REASON SAID FRENCHWOMAN IS STILL ALIVE…
SO TRY ‘BEFORE’ YOUR SHIT FINDS YOU, AS EVEN IF YOU CAN’T CHANGE ‘UNTIL’ YOUR SHIT FINDS YOU, IF YOU ARE NOT READY FOR ‘WHEN’ YOUR SHIT FINDS YOU THEN YOUR SHIT WON’T ‘CURE YOU’, IT WILL ‘KILL YOU’. AND TRUST ME, YOUR SHIT IS GOING TO FIND YOU…
For the rest of ya JUST GET THE FUCK ON WITH IT, EH, YOU ARE SO FUCKING BORING IT IS BEYOND TEDIOUS NOW – TRY AND GO TO YOUR GRAVE A LITTLE HIGHER UP THE FOOD CHAIN OF LIFE. So start washing OFF all the baked on dog shit from all the pointless little ‘strays’ that populate your life, put the simple goal of ‘financial freedom’ in FRONT OF YOUR MIND as your BIG PICTURE, and KICK IT UP A NOTCH. Start to ‘actively manage’ the ‘IMPRESSION YOUR GIVE OFF’, if nothing else you will understand what a TOXIC TRAINWRECK you have been all these years, so at least you will know HOW YOU HAVE COME TO WASH UP HERE AS ONE MORE ‘STATISTICALLY INSIGNIFICANT LITTLE CONSUMER’ filling your life with shit YOU NEITHER WANT OR NEED, for a life full of ‘NOTHING WORTH A DAMN’, a life with no goals, no god, and no idea.
Yet your precious LIFE IS COMING TO ‘THE END’ much quicker than you thought – YOU HAVE GOT OLDER, SO SEE THE DEATH IN EVERY PHYSICAL CHANGE and realize YOU CAN’T STAY THE SAME, YOU FOOL. Take control of that FORCED CHANGE, in truth all you need to DO IS SHOW YOUR GIFT WHAT YOU WANT ‘CONSISTENTLY’, TO GET PRACTICAL – RIGHT NOW YOU ARE POOR, UGLY and STUPID, A CHAINSTORE WHORE, YOU ‘BLEND IN’, SO JUST PICK ONE AND FIX IT. The rest will happen by itself, when you realize what to TRY means by TRYING, then you can at least LOOK LIKE AN INDIVIDUAL. GIVE YOUR GIFT A CHANCE TO HELP YOU, FIND A WAY TO BE BRAVE ENOUGH TO FEEL ‘THE SHAME’, SO YOU CAN LEARN TO FEEL EVERYTHING ELSE IT USES TO HELP YOU, INSTEAD OF JUST SLAMMING THE DOOR IN HER FACE LIKE ‘A GUTLESS TRICK’. You are supposed to be ‘INSTINCTIVE ROYALTY’, REMEMBER THIS…
TOB Dec/2024.
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Now, I NEVER intended to write this POST as a SECRET, because what it contains is SIMPLY about GROWING UP, however….
…….IT APPEARS MOST OF YOU NEED HELP WITH THAT, AS THE CONCEPT HAS BEEN QUIETLY REMOVED FROM ‘YOUR SOCIETY’, so you DON’T KNOW WHAT IT MEANS for ‘YOU’, WHAT IT, A ‘CHILDISH MINDSET’ CAN DO TO YOUR WHOLE LIFE – YOU DON’T KNOW HOW BLOODY DANGEROUS ‘IT’ IS, AND SO THE IMPORTANCE OF REPLACING ‘IT’ WITH A ‘DOMINATE SENSE OF SELF’, that overrides ‘everything else’, TO BE ‘MATURE’.
But the real issue with NEVER GROWING UP is that ‘YOU’ THINK ‘YOU’ HAVE MADE A SUCCESS OF IT, OF BEING A BIG KID, BECAUSE ‘IT’ TELLS YOU THAT, IT MAKES ANYTHING ELSE SEEM ‘BAD’, so TODAY WE HAVE TO ‘BREAK THAT ILLUSION’ in YOU, by showing you what a BIG KID ‘IS’, before WE get you to TAKE A HAMMER TO ‘IT’ – TO SMASH ALL YOUR DELLUSIONS TO PIECES. See, to think like a child as an adult is AN INCREDIBLY DANGEROUS THING FOR GIFTED, because YOU ARE ‘WEAK MINDED’, FECKLESS, CHANGEABLE, and therefore can NEVER DEVELOP YOURSELF, unless YOU ARE FORCED TOO.
So here is the reason YOU need to take this serious, RIGHT NOW: YOU HAVE AN UNCONSCIOUS ‘INFERIORITY COMPLEX’ THAT CONTROLS YOU, AS YOU HAVE NEVER GOT RID OF THE NATURAL ONE THAT A CHILD HAS TO SPUR ITS NEED TO ‘LEARN FAST’ AS AN INFANT – A CHILDISH MINDSET IS A ‘FAKE CHARACTER’ A BIOLOGICAL IMPLANT THAT IS ACTUALLY IN YOUR DNA, A NECCESSARY ‘HOLDING ACTION’ OF AN UNCONSCIOUS, AUTOMATIC ‘SET OF CHARACTER PATTERNS’ AS A ‘MINDSET’, AT LEAST UNTIL YOU DEVELOP A REAL CHARACTER, CONSCIOUSLY, AND SURPASS THESE ‘TRAINING WHEELS’.
THIS MINDSET IS ‘A MACHINE’ NOT A RATIONALE CHARACTER, AN OVERARCHING MECHANISM DESIGNED TO USE INSTINCTIVE REACTIONS TO ‘LEARN BY COPYING’ AND ‘KEEP YOU ALIVE’ IN ‘THE MOMENT’, UNTIL YOU HAVE LEARNT TO KEEP YOURSELF ALIVE. IT IS PART OF YOUR BIOLOGY, PART OF THE PROCESS OF GROWING UP, AND ONLY WORKS IN ‘THE NOW’, AUTOMATICALLY, IT DOES NOT THINK – IT IS A GROUP OF MASTER PATTERNS DESIGNED TO ‘LEARN FROM LOCAL REALITY’ AND GENERATE PRACTICAL ‘FALSE INSTINCTS’ AS REACTIONS TO THAT REALITY TO ‘HELP YOU’ NEXT TIME ‘SHIT HAPPENS’.
What that means as a ‘CHILDISH’ ADULT, A ‘BIG KID’, IS THIS – YOU ARE ‘CURSED’ WITH AN UNCONSCIOUS SET OF SIMPLE CHARACTER PATTERNS THAT OVER POWER EVERTHING ELSE, THAT CONTROL YOU VIA A SET OF ‘OUT OF DATE’ ‘FALSE INSTINCTIVE REACTIONS’ YOU THINK ARE A NATURAL, AUTHENTIC CHARACTER, BUT OF WHICH YOU ARE ALMOST TOTALLY UNAWARE OF MOMENT TO MOMENT. YOU DON’T KNOW WHY ‘YOUR NO-CHARACTER’ DOES STUFF, YOU JUST ‘JUSTIFY WHAT IT DOES’ AFTERWARD AS YOU DON’T SEE ITS CHILDISH, SELF DESTRUCTIVE MOTIVES FOR WHAT IT MAKES YOU DO AS AN URGENT, ‘UNCONSCIOUS’ REACTION, IN ‘THE MOMENT’ OF ITS ‘NEED TO DEFEND ITSELF’, BEFORE DISAPPEARING TO THE ‘BACK OF YOUR MIND’ AGAIN.
SEE – THERE IS ‘NO CHARACTER’, THE MIND STATE OF A CHILD IS NOT CAPABLE OF ‘RATIONALE CHARACTER AS THOUGHT’, IT JUST ‘REACTS’, so make no mistake, IT’S ‘A CURSE ON YOU’, on your WHOLE LIFE, and it WILL NEVER GO AWAY BY ITSELF…
THE MINDSET OF A CHILD IS CONCERNED WITH ONE THING ONLY = ANXIETY.
IT IS CONTROLLED BY ANXIETY, FEAR BECAUSE IT ‘HAS TO BE’, IT HAS NO OTHER ‘FACULTIES’.
SO THE ‘URGENT PANG’ OF ‘FLEETING ANXIETY’ OVERPOWERS ‘IT’ WITH EMOTIONALLY WEIGHTED ‘INSTINCTS’ IN ‘THE MOMENT’.
ITS ONLY ‘UNCONSCIOUS’ ‘GOAL IN LIFE’ IS ‘EMOTIONAL COMFORT’, REACTIONARY ‘EGO SAFETY’ = DISTRACTION FROM ANXIETY.
BUT THE REACTIONS OF ‘UNCONSCIOUS YOU’ ARE NO LONGER YOU, ‘CONSCIOUS YOU’ IS YOU – ‘YOU’ WILL ‘CONSCIOUS DECISIONS’.
YET CONSCIOUS YOU IDENTIFIES WITH YOUR IMPLANTED ‘INSTINCTIVE THOUGHTS/FEELINGS’ AS ‘A REAL SELF’, ‘WHO KNOWS’.
BUT UNCONSCIOUS YOU IS JUST A ROLE MADE OF RIGID PATTERNS OF REACTION LEARNT AS A CHILD BY CHANCE = NOT YOU.
SADLY EVEN WHEN YOU KNOW THIS, CONSCIOUS YOU IS ‘TOO WEAK’ TO OVERPOWER UNCONSCIOUS YOU, SO YOU JUST ‘ACCEPT IT’.
SEE YOU HAVE UNKNOWINGLY ‘SIDED’ WITH ‘YOUR ENEMY’ OF PUBLIC WEAKNESS, THE COMFORT OF A CHILD, YOU HAVE FAILED TO GROW UP AND FACE IT ‘DOWN’, SO YOU JUST GET WEAKER, EVERY TIME YOU FAIL TO DO SO:
SO NOW EVERY PUBLIC HUMILIATION IS COMFORTED VIA THE PRIVATE, ‘SECRET CLEVERNESS’ OF A KID, AS A WAY OF LIFE…
SEE THE REASON YOU ARE SO DESPERATE, SO OBSESSED, SO STRUNG OUT ALL THE TIME IS YOU ARE ‘NOTHING IN YOURSELF’.
AND YOU KNOW IT, SOMETIMES YOU EVEN HATE IT, BUT YOU CAN’T FACE IT, CAN YOU – ITS ‘ALL YOU KNOW’ ANYMORE…
SO BEST KNOW THIS IS THE REASON WHY PEOPLE LIKE ME ‘PITY YOU’, YET DO NOTHING TO HELP YOU…
SEE WE CAN’T HELP A SCARED ‘DELUSIONAL CHILD’, IT JUST RUNS AWAY – ONLY CONSCIOUS ‘YOU’ CAN FACE ‘IT’…
NOW…. I HAVE NO INTEREST IN EXPLAINING THE ‘BIOLOGICAL PROCESS OF GROWING UP’ TO YOU – OF HOW YOUR PREFRONTAL CORTEX LEARNS TO OVERCOME THE PREPROGRAMMED REACTIONS OF THE AMYGDALA IN YOUR BRAIN VIA DISCOMFORT, SO YOU UNDERSTAND THAT YOU ‘FEEL THE FEAR’ AND DO IT ANYWAY SO YOU BECOME CONFIDENT ‘AFTERWARD’, AS AN ‘EMOTIONAL RUSH’ IN SET STAGES, WHICH BUILD ‘CONSCIOUS YOU’ AS LAYERS OF ACTUAL CHARACTER. YOUR SOCIETY DECIDED THAT WAS NOT REQUIRED ANYMORE, SO ITS KINDA OF SAD THAT YOUR BIOLOGY DOES NOT GIVE THE SMALLEST FUCK WHAT YOUR SOCIETY THINKS AN ANIMAL SHOULD ‘BE’ – YOUR BIOLOGY STILL OWNS YOU…
SEE THERE IS NO POINT – YOU DID NOT DO ANY OF THAT AS A CHILD SO ‘YOU ARE WHERE YOU ARE’, YOU CANNOT GO BACK AND USE THESE SIMPLE MECHANISMS TO DEFEAT THE NOW MUCH MORE POWERFUL MECHANISM OF ‘YOU THE CHILDISH FUCK UP’. SO YOU THINK PETTY FUN IS AN END IN ITSELF, YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND THAT PETTY FUN IS A LEARNING MECHANISM FOR CHILDREN TO HELP THEM GET PAST THEIR FEAR OF PAIN, SUDDEN DEATH AND SIMULATE DIFFICULT ENVIRONMENTS UNTIL YOU DEVELOP THE SKILLS TO WIN BY REPEATING LEARNING SCENARIOS AS ENDLESS GAMES, BECAUSE THEY ARE FUN. NO, LITTLE YOU USES FUN TO PERVERT ITSELF INTO NOTHINGNESS, PLAYING DEAD END, POINTLESS GAMES THAT TEACH TWATTY LITTLE YOU TO FANTASIZE ABOUT EVERYTHING LIKE A FUCKING DORK = YOU LIVE IN A FANTASY WORLD MADE OF ‘GAMES’/’MOVIES’/’PORN’/’DRUGS’, WITH NO CONNECTION OR NEED TO MAKE ANY OF THAT ‘REAL’ = YOU LITERALLY TEACH YOURSELF TO BE A TOTAL DORK.
SEE ALL OF MY GENIUS IN REACHING YOU WITH THESE TRUTHS WOULD BE WASTED – YOU ARE A CHILD, SO YOU KNOW NOTHING ‘REAL’, EVERYTHING IS INSUBSTANTIAL, BECAUSE ‘YOU ARE INSUBSTANTIAL’. SO EXPLAINING THE BIOLOGICAL NEED FOR A ‘RANK OF ACHIEVEMENT’ IS POINTLESS – YOU THINK RANK IS MONEY AND CELEBRITY. IF I TRIED TO EXPLAIN YOUR EXPEREINCE OF TIME IS YOUR GREATEST ALLY YOU WOULD THINK I AM MAD – A CHILD IS SO WEAK IT JUST EXPEREINCES TIME AS A CONSTANT SEQUENCE OF MOMENTS THAT CONSTANTLY OVERWHELM ONE ANOTHER IN A CYCLE, SO YOU CONSTANTLY ‘FORGET’ EVERYTHING, YOU CANNOT FOCUS ON ANYTHING, SO TIME IS YOUR GREATEST ENEMY, AS A CHILD. AND IF I DARED POINT OUT YOUR LACK OF GOALS, YOUR LACK OF POINT, YOUR FAILURE TO UNDERSTAND ‘THE ESSENTIAL NATURE’ OF A ‘Cursus Honorum’ (Sorry, Lucius Cornelius Sulla, the greatest of all Roman Dictators), OF THE NEED FOR YOUR VERY OWN ‘PATH OF HONOR’ IN THIS WORLD, THEN YOU CALL ME A ‘FASCISTI’, A BAD MAN, STUCK IN SOME ARISTOCRATIC PAST, TOTALLY REDUNDANT NOW ‘WE ARE ALL EQUAL’.
YET I AM ONLY POINTING OUT TO YOU HOW YOUR BIOLOGY WORKS, AND THEREFORE WHAT YOU NEED TO REMEMBER YOUR ANCESTORS PERFECTED, LONG AGO… SEE, AND WORST OF ALL, IF I EXPLAININED WHAT BIOLOGICAL ANXIETY IS ACTUALLY FOR, THE TREMENDOUS BENEFIT OF FACING IT, USING IT, CONTROLLING IT, THEN YOU WOULD THINK I WAS A MASOCHIST, SOME FRUIT LOOP HOLY MAN TELLING YOU TO SUFFER FOR GOD, WITH YOUR OWN INTERPRETATION OF A ‘HAIR SHIRT’. YOUR FAILURE TO UNDERSTAND ANXIETY AND SO YOUR BURNING DESIRE TO AVOID IT IS REALLY WHAT KEEPS YOU STUCK AS A CHILD, WHAT MAKES YOU PATHETIC, HARMLESS, AND SO WEAK THAT YOU ARE PROBABLY EVEN MORE STUPID NOW THAT YOU WERE AT 16 YEARS OLD, LET ALONE WHAT IT HAS DONE TO YOUR ENERGY LEVELS. SEE ALL OF THESE THINGS MEAN THE HIGH POINT OF YOUR LIFE HAS LONG SINCE PASSED, THE HIGH POINT OF A CHILD, AND NOW ITS ALL, AND QUITE STEEPLY, ‘DOWN HILL’ – YOU LIVE IN A MEMORY OF CHILDHOOD, CONSTANTLY TRYING TO REHASH THOSE FEELINGS WHEN THEY HAVE LONG SINCE SERVED THEIR PURPOSE, AND CALLING IT ‘A LIFE’ = DELUSIONAL.
SO TODAY WE HAVE TO DEAL WITH WHAT YOUR FAILURE TO GROW UP MEANS RIGHT NOW – WHAT NOT DOING WHAT YOU SHOULD OF DONE HAS DONE TO YOU, THE NOTHING OF YOU IT HAS CREATED – YOU HAVE TO ‘REALIZE’ WHAT ‘YOU’ ARE ‘UNCONSCIOUSLY’, AND THEN MAKE A PROJECT OF CHANGING IT CONSCIOUSLY. THIS CHANGE FROM ‘BEING’ ‘UNCONSCIOUS YOU THE CHILD’ TO BEING ‘A CONSCIOUS YOU’ IS THE PROCESS OF GROWING UP – ‘YOU’ OVERPOWER ‘IT’.
SADLY THERE IS NOW A LOT OF MORE OF IT THAN THERE WAS AS A KID, AND EVEN WORSE YOU THINK THAT GUTLESS LITTLE BITCH IS ‘YOU’ – YOU INDENTIFY WITH YOUR UNCONSCIOUS LITTLE KID AS YOU, FOR REASONS BEST KNOWN TO YOURSELF, AS YOU DON’T EVEN LIKE THEM, DO YOU, BUT I GUESS YOU JUST ARE THAT DUMB, BECAUSE YOU HAVE ‘BECOME THAT WEAK’…
SEE YOU ARE WAY, WAY, W.A.Y. TOO MOTHERFUCKING WEAK NOW, ‘YOU’ DO WHATEVER IT TELLS YOU, UNLESS YOU ARE EVEN MORE SCARED OF YOUR EXTERNAL REALITY THAN OF YOUR REACTIONS IN THE MOMENT – YOUR ‘WILL’ HAS BEEN ‘BROKEN BY ‘SUFFERING ANXIETY’, WHICH YOU NOW ACCEPT AS NORMAL BECAUSE WITHOUT ‘THE CONSTANT ‘CONFIDENT USE OF WILLPOWER’ YOU JUST GET WEAKER AND WEAKER, SO THERE IS ‘NO YOU’, JUST ‘IT’, WHEN YOU ARE ‘EMOTIONAL’…
‘IT’ KEEPS YOU ‘TRAPPED IN A TRAIN OF THOUGHT’ THAT MAKES YOU ‘COPE VIA COMFORT’ WHILST ACTUALLY PRODUCING MORE ANXIETY, OFTEN VIA THE FEELING OF PETTY DESIRE WHICH IS SIMPLY A REPACKAGED VERSION OF THAT SAME FELT WEAKNESS OF ANXIETY. BUT TO YOU IT LOOKS LIKE ‘RELIEF FROM ANXIETY’, A FELT, FLEETING ‘THRILL’, WHICH IS JUST TO ‘BOUNCE BACK’ FROM A STRONGLY FELT ANXIETY IN THE MOMENT, TO ‘RELEASE THE TENSION OF YOUR GO-TO DESIRE’, THAT YOU THE CHILD HAS ACTUALLY CREATED FOR THIS SPECIFIC PURPOSE. BUT THAT DESIRE ‘FOR SOMETHING’ DOES NOT EXIST – IT IS EMPTY – ITS JUST THE PROJECTION OF THE NEED FOR ‘MOMENTARY ANXIETY RELIEF’ IN GENERAL, ONTO THE RANDOM EVENTS OF THE MOMENT.
BUT YOU ‘CHASE IT’, AND SO CHASE ‘MORE WEAKNESS’ OF GIVING INTO FELT ANXIETY – YOUR ENTIRE STRATERGY FOR LIFE IS TO DISTRACT YOURSELF FROM YOUR HATED, ANXIOUS REALITY RATHER THAN FIX IT, SO YOU ‘DELUDE YOURSELF’ THAT YOU ‘FEEL BETTER VIA DESIRE’, WHILST ACTUALLY MAKING EVERYTHING MUCH WORSE = MAKING YOU ‘MUCH WEAKER’ = MORE ANXIOUS. THE ‘MECHANISM’ OF ‘YOU THE CHILD’ IS TO CONTINUALLY ‘SEEK COMFORT’ IN EVENTS, TO ‘FETISHSIZE’ REALITY BY CREATING A FANTASY ABOUT IT, TAKING ‘ANY OPPORTUNTTY’ TO FEEL ‘MOMENTARY RELIEF FROM ANXIEY’. AND YOU DON’T EVEN CARE THAT ITS FAKE, THAT YOU KNOW THE DESIRE WILL EVAPORATE THE MOMENT YOU ‘FEED IT’ – YOU NEED IT TO ‘COPE’ SO YOU SPEND YOUR LIFE LOOKING FOR ‘LITTLE WINS’, SECRET CLEVERNESS.
THE BEST WAY TO THINK ABOUT IT IS AS A SET OF DOMINANT PATTERNS WORKING LIKE AN OLD ENGINE THAT PUMPS FUEL INTO ITSELF, PRODUCING ‘A TRAIN OF THOUGHT’, PULSING ALONG FOR EVERY NEW CONSCIOUS MOMENT THAT REFRESHES YOUR AWARENESS WITH A ‘NEW’ THOUGHT IN THE SAME PRE-SET SEQEUNCE, AS IT GOES THROUGH THE SAME PRE-SET CYCLE. THERE IS NO INTELLIGENCE, NO RATIONALE THINKING, IT JUST DOES THE SAME THING OVER AND OVER, CREATING FELT ANXIETY FOR THE SAKE OF CREATING FELT RELIEF FROM THAT SAME ANXIETY, WHICH CREATES MORE ANXIETY AND SO ON IN A CYCLE, WHILE SLOWLY WEARING ITSELF OUT. IT IS POINTLESS – ITS ONLY GOAL IS MORE COMFORT, WHICH ONLY EXIST AGAINST MORE ANXIETY – YOU MIND HAS TURNED IN ON ITSELF, WHILE CONSCIOUS YOU WATCHES ON, WITH NO CLUE WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT, SO ACCEPTS IT, AND LETS THAT ENGINE SPIN FASTER AND FASTER BY FEEDING IT MORE ANXIETY IN ORDER TO GENERATE MORE PETTY ‘DESIRE FOR SOMETHING’ THAT YOU DON’T ACTUALLY WANT, LITERALLY THE MOMENT YOU GET IT.
SEE THIS SIMPLE CHILDISH MECHANISM OF MIND HAS BECOME THE POINT OF YOU BECAUSE YOU HAVE NEVER ‘BEEN FORCED’ TO ‘SURPASS IT’, ‘TO IGNORE IT’ FOR A GREATER GOOD OR BIGGER FEAR, TO RISE ABOVE IT. SO YOUR INSTINCTIVE ‘TRAIN OF THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS’ HAVE A MASSIVE LEVEL OF MOMENTUM CONTROLLED BY THE CONTINUAL REPETITION OF THIS SIMPLE MECHANSIM, THEY SPIN FASTER AND FASTER – WHATEVER YOU TRY AND THINK CONSCIOUSLY IS OVERPOWERED BY THEM IN THE MOMENT BY THE NEED FOR RELIEF. YOU HAVE ALLOWED IT TO FEED ITSELF, GET BIGGER AND MORE POWERFUL BY TAKING ALL YOUR ENERGY, YOUR FOCUS UNCONSCIOUSLY, INSTEAD OF KEEPING THAT ENERGY FOR CONSCIOUS YOU ‘TO CONTROL’. NOW YOU HAVE NO CONTROL OF YOUR THOUGHTS, DO YOU, SO YOUR THOUGHTS SEEK TO PROTECT THEMSELVES – YOU NEVER DOUBT YOUR THOUGHTS AS VALID AT ALL, YOU CANNOT LAUGH AT THEM AS INSIGNIFICANT, YOU HAVE TO THINK THEM…
BUT MUCH AS YOU CANNOT STICK YOUR HANDS INTO THAT MACHINE AND STOP IT SPINNING MANUALLY, AND I’M NOT GOING TO USE FORCED SHOCKS TO SMASH THAT MACHINE TO PIECES WHILE YOU SCREAM IN PAIN, YOU STILL HAVE A CHOICE TODAY. SEE YOU DON’T HAVE TO WAIT UNTIL THAT MACHINE OVERHEATS BEFORE EVENTUALLY ‘BLOWING UP’, I CAN SHOW YOU THE CONTROLS OF THAT MACHINE, AND THEN YOU CAN DECIDE IF YOU WANT TO USE THEM – YOU MUST DECIDE TO COMMIT TO THIS PROCESS, EVEN IF YOU THINK YOU ARE TOO WEAK TO DO IT. SEE I CAN LEND YOU THE STRENGTH AND THE KNOWLEDGE YOU NEED, BUT YOU MUST BE STRONG ENOUGH TO AT LEAST MAKE A DECISION OUT OF YOUR REMAINING WILL = FEAR OF (SOMETHING)…
SO MY JOB TODAY IS TO GET YOU TO MAKE THAT CHOICE ‘EARLY’ – TO WANT TO STOP BEFORE YOU FEEL ‘YOU NEED TO’, BECAUSE YOU UNDERSTAND, IN A REASONED, ABSTRACT WAY IF YOU WAIT UNTIL YOUR ENERGY, YOUR WEAKNESS HAS OVERHWELMED YOU WITH ‘EMOTIONAL PROBLEMS’, THEN YOU WON’T BE ABLE TO STOP, AND THERE WILL BE LITTLE POINT IN US HELPING YOU TO STOP, AS THERE IS NOTHING LEFT WORTH HELPING. INDEED TO HELP MANY PEOPLE AT THE END, WHEN THEIR BIOLOGICAL RANK HAS DECLINE BENEATH WHAT THEY HAD AS A CHILD, IS ACTUALLY CRUEL, YOU ARE BETTER OFF MENTALLY TO KEEP ON COPING THE BEST YOU CAN, AND THEN JUST DRIFT OFF INTO OBLIVION…
ALL this means I have to give you this LOGICALLY, SO YOU KNOW WHAT IT IS BY RECOGNIZING HOW IT WORKS FOR YOU – TO SEE YOURSELF AS OTHERS SEE YOU. SO, VERY SIMPLY PUT, NOW YOU MUST SEE YOURSELF IN ‘THE ABSTRACT’ OF A TYPE, WHICH IS A GENERIC ROLE YOU HAVE PERSONALIZED VIA YOUR ENVIRONMENTAL INTERACTIONS OVER THE YEARS, THEN SEE WHAT IS ‘WRONG WITH THAT’. THEN YOU HAVE A CHANCE OF UNDERSTANDING THAT ‘I’ NEED TO IMPLANT A ‘SUPERIORITY COMPLEX’ IN THE BACK OF YOUR MIND TO REPLACE THE ‘INFERIORITY COMPLEX’ YOU HAVE NEVER BOTHERED GETTING RID OFF, AND SO NOW OWNS ‘YOU THE BIG KID’.
THIS IS MY PREFER WAY TO GROW GIFTED FOLKS UP WITHOUT SHOCKS, MUCH AS SOME OF YOU WOULD STILL NEED THOSE SHOCKS, AS YOUR MIND MAY ALREADY BE TOO FAR GONE, YOUR CHILDISH TRAIN OF AUTOMATIC THOUGHT MAY ALREADY BE TOO STRONG FOR YOU TO STOP, EVEN THOUGH YOUR RANK REMAINS, FOR NOW. SHOCKS HAVE TO BE DONE IN PERSON, SO IF YOU DON’T KNOW ME YOU WILL NEED TO FIND ANOTHER WAY TO DO IT, SORRY.
ALL OF THIS IS EASY WHEN ‘YOU SEE IT’, BUT SEEING IT IS HARD, BECAUSE YOU THE CHILD WILL STOP YOU SEEING IT, WITH ALL ITS JUSTIFICATIONS, ALL ITS EXCUSES FOR CONTINUING ‘TO BE IT’. SO SADLY MANY OF YOU WILL FAIL TO EVEN START THIS PROCESS, AS YOU HAVE FAILED TO GROW UP SO MANY TIMES BEFORE, AND MUST WAIT FOR THE MOMENT OF YOUR DEATH BEFORE ‘YOU SNAP OUT OF IT’ – GOOD LUCK WITH THAT.
SO HERE WE GO —
AN UNCONCIOUS CHILD PRODUCES ‘CONSTANT WEAKNESS’ AND THEN ‘COPES VIA DISTRACTION’ = ‘YOU GET WEAKER’.
‘WEAKNESS’ DOES NOT ‘WORK’, IT DOES NOT ‘FIX ANXIETY’, ITS ‘DISTRACTS YOU’ FROM ANXIETY WITH FANTASY = COPING.
BUT YOU DON’T NEED TO FIX ANXIETY, YOU NEED TO ACCEPT IT SO YOU CAN SURPASS IT BY BECOMING ‘SUPERIOR TO IT’.
SEE IF YOU DON’T GROW UP ALL YOU EVER DO IN THIS LIFE IS ‘COMFORT YOURSELF’ FOR BEING A SCARED KID – ‘TO COPE WITH IT’.
ALL COPING TACTICS ARE ‘DISTRACTIONS’, A REJECTION OF FELT ANXIETY, WHICH BUILDS THE FEELING OF ANXIETY = SUICIDE.
THINK ABOUT WHAT I HAVE WRITTEN ABOVE FOR A SECOND, TRY AND SEE THE MADDNESS IN IT, THE FAILURE, THE HUMILIATION – TO BE A DELUDED SLAVE BECAUSE YOU HAVE LEARNT TO DISTRACT YOURSELF FROM THE ANXIETY OF LIFE WITH THE ANXIETY OF PETTY DESIRE. SEE EVERY CHOICE A KID MAKES IS BASED ON THE NEED TO FEEL ‘A BIT BETTER’, TO ‘FEEL CLEVER’, BY LESSENING THEIR ANXIETY IN THE MOMENT, LIKE A FRIGHTENED CHILD – IT USUALLY FEELS WEAK, STUPID, ANXIOUS, ITS MOODS ARE FRAGILE, ITS CENTRE OF MENTAL GRAVITY IS ‘DOOMSDAYING’. ITS ALL ANXIETY, THE MINDSET OF KID DOMINATES YOU STILL – YOU USE THE ANXIETY OF PETTY DESIRE TO DISTRACT FROM YOUR ANXIETY OF EXISTENTIAL DREAD = MORE ANXIETY…
SO ANY CLEVERNESS, ANY SECRET, ANY COMFORT AT ALL, HOWEVER BANAL, TRIVIAL AND FAKE, WORKS LIKE A DRUG HIT, A PAINKILLER – IT GIVES YOU MOMENTARY RELIEF WHILST STRENTHENING THE NEED TO TAKE THE DRUG AGAIN, AS THAT DRUG INCREASES YOU BACKGROUND ANXIETY ‘ON PURPOSE’. SEE THAT NEED FOR A ‘BETTER MOMENTARY FEELING’ IS ‘EGOIC SUFFERING’, EVEN THOUGH THAT PETTY SUFFERING IS FELT AS THE ‘DESIRE FOR QUICK COMFORT’, ‘CONSCIOUS YOU’ STILL HAS TO GIVE IN AND COMFORT IT IN ORDER TO ‘COPE’ WITH THAT FEELING – THE REACTION IS AUTOMATIC.
IT IS IMPORTANT TO GET THIS NOW – HOWEVER MUCH FUN YOUR ‘ANTICIPATION OF RELIEF’ FEELS TO YOU IN THE MOMENT, WHAT YOU ARE ACTUALLY FEELING IS ‘SUFFERING’, TENSION – YOUR KID IS GETTING YOU ‘TO PUT ON TIGHT SHOES FOR THE COMFORT OF TAKING THEM OFF’. THE ‘LESSENING OF SUFFERING’ IS STILL SUFFERING, IT IS NOT PLEASURE, IT IS NOT FUN, ITS NOT EXCITING, IT IS NOT COOL, IT IS NOT POWER, IT IS NOT CONTROL, IT IS NOT ANY-FUCKING-THING ACCEPT THE MOMENTARY ‘LESSENING OF YOUR FELT ANXIETIES’ – YOU CREATE ‘MORE WEAKNESS’ to feel ‘RELIEF FROM WEAKNESS’ = SELF DESTRUCTIVE MADDNESS.
BUT YOU DON’T THINK THAT, DO YOU, YOU ARE BLINDED BY YOUR ‘TRAIN OF THOUGHTS’, YOU ARE STUPID, SO I’LL NEED TO BE VERY CLEAR:
THE ONLY REASON YOU DON’T SEE THIS IN THE MOMENT IS THAT YOU DON’T EXPERIENCE YOUR THOUGHTS PRIOR TO YOUR REACTIONS TO THOSE THOUGHTS, YOU THINK ‘YOUR REACTIONS ARE YOUR THOUGHTS’, BUT THEY ARE ‘SANITIZED’ ANTICIPATIONS OF COMFORT – ‘JUSTIFICATIONS’.
ALL YOUR JUSTIFICATIONS ARE 2ND HAND, ‘AFTER THE FACT’, YOUR ACTUAL THOUGHTS, ‘WHO YOU ARE’ IN THAT MOMENT, IS ACTUALLY ‘WHAT YOU ARE TRYING TO COMFORT’ – YOU DON’T KNOW YOURSELF AT ALL, YOUR CONSCIOUS CHARACTER IS THE COMFORTING PATTERN REACTIONS OF A KID.
THESE PATTERN TRIGGERS THAT ARE THE SOURCE OF YOUR CONSCIOUS REACTIONS ARE THE CONTROLS YOU NEED TO GRASP, SO YOU CAN REPLACE THE INFERIORITY OF YOUR CURRENT CHILDISH TRIGGERS WITH THE SUPERIORITY OF AN ADULTS TRIGGERS, THE TRIGGERS OF ‘BETTER THAN’ THEM.
SEE, IF YOU KNEW WHAT YOU ACTUALLY THINK PRIOR TO YOUR PATTERNS REACTIONS – YOUR ‘PATTERN TRIGGERS’ – YOU WOULD SEE THAT YOU THE CHILD IS A CRAVEN, WEAK, STUPID, TWATTY, NEEDY COMFORT SEEKING LITTLE FUCK UP, THEN YOU WILL WANT TO CHANGE IT.
BUT BECAUSE YOU DON’T SEE THAT, BECAUSE YOU HAVE NO ‘INTERNAL DIALOGUE’, NO SELF-CONSCIOUSNESS IN THE MOMENT TO BE ‘BEFORE REACTION’, YOU THINK YOU ARE GOOD, ‘JUSTIFIED’ IN YOUR PATTERNS, SIMPLY BY THE DELUSION OF MAKING THEM ‘APPEAR GOOD’ TO YOU. IF YOU KNEW THE TRUTH OF YOU AS THE ACTUAL ‘INFERIOR FEELING’ OF YOUR ‘TRIGGERS’ YOU WOULD ‘DOUBT YOURSELF’, DOUBT THE ‘VALIDITY OF YOUR REACTIONS’, NATURALLY, WILLINGLY, POWERFULLY, BECAUSE YOU WOULD HATE ‘THE DISHONOR’ OF YOU THE CHILD AS MUCH AS WE DO.
IN ZEN THEY CALL THIS INNER DIALOGUE TO ‘SEE INTO YOUR TRUE NATURE’, WHICH BEGINS WITH ‘GROWING THE FUCK UP’ ENOUGH TO KNOW THAT ‘YOU DON’T KNOW’ THE MOMENT TO MOMENT CAUSES OF YOUR REACTIONS – YOU DON’T KNOW THE WHY OF WHAT YOU DO, THE ‘BAD FAITH’ OF IT.
BUT YOU CAN KNOW THAT ‘WHY’ – AS A KID YOU HAVE THE CHARACTER OF ‘NO CHARACTER’, TO UNCONSCIOUSLY ‘SEEK COMFORT’ AUTOMATICALLY, SO EVERYTHING YOU DO, THINK, FEEL EXISTS WITHIN THAT, AS YOUR ‘KID DOES NOT WANT YOU TO DO ANYTHING ELSE’, AND YOUR KID IS ‘ALL YOU ARE’…
BUT IF YOU STOP AN AUTOMATIC REACTION YOU HAVE IDENTIFIED AS BAD FROM EXPEREINCE AND DO NOTHING, YOU WILL FIND THE ACTUAL PATTERN TRIGGER WILL ECHO IN YOUR CONSCIOUSNESS MUCH MORE STRONGLY, AND YOU WILL START TO FEEL ‘THE WHY’ OF YOUR REACTIONS – INFERIORITY.
THEN YOU WILL KNOW WHAT THE CLASSIC NEW AGE LINE ‘ALL PETTY DESIRE IS SUFFERING’ (Sorry, Buddha) MEANS – ALL YOUR PETTY DESIRE ACTUALLY IS SUFFERING AS A FEELING, WHICH YOU ARE TRYING TO LESSEN BY A VENTING REACTION, TO FEEL SLIGHTLY LESS ANXIOUS, ITS NOT ACTUALLY FUN…
ALL YOUR PETTY DESIRES COME FROM ‘THIS HIDDEN, FELT SUFFERING’ OF ‘YOUR INFERIORITY COMPLEX’, THAT IS WHY YOU DO IT – FELT INFERIORITY IS THE LONGTERM HANGOVER OF ‘YOU THE CHILD’, A SELF OBSSESSED NARCISSIST.
THE KEY IS TO UNDERSTAND WHAT PETTY MEANS – TRANSIENT, TEMPORARY – AS THAT MEANS ITS A CON, NOT A REAL DESIRE BUT A COMFORT, BECAUSE IT PASSESS THE MOMENT IT IS DONE, TO THE POINT YOU OFTEN FIND IT SICKENING IN RETROSPECT, YOU DON’T KNOW ‘WHAT CAME OVER YOU’…
THEN IT (SHOULD) BE SIMPLE TO SIMPLY REMIND YOURSELF OF THE COUNTLESS NUMBER OF TIMES YOU HAVE BEEN FOOLED INTO CHASING COMFORTS AS DESIRES, YOU SHOULD BE ABLE TO SEE THAT ‘THE FUN’ IS ALL IN ‘THE ANTICIPATION’ AND ‘THE HALO EFFECT’ OF ‘COMFORT=RELIEF’, AFTERWARDS.
YOU MUST UNDERSTAND THIS SWITCH OF SIDES ‘IN THE NOW’ – YOU WANT A MOMENTARY ‘ILLUSION OF A FOCUSED DESIRE’, OF ‘SOME PARTICULAR THING’ NEARBY IN YOUR ENVIRONMENT, BUT YOU ARE ‘DELUDED’, IT IS SIMPLY A ‘COMFORTING MECHANISM’, NOT A REAL DESIRE FOR SOMETHING.
THIS REALIZATION ‘HAPPENS’ WHEN YOU SEE THROUGH THE DESIRE AS ‘EMPTY’ OF ANY PLEASURE OR FUN IN ITSELF, IT IS AN ‘UGLY’ PROCESS IN ITSELF – YOUR FUN IS SIMPLY THE ANTICIPATION AND THEN HALO EFFECT OF ‘RELIEF’ FROM THAT SAME ‘ANXIETY OF PETTY DESIRE’ WHICH ‘COMFORTS’ YOU.
YOU MUST GET THAT THE ‘FEELING OF THE PETTY DESIRE’ IS THE ‘FEELING OF ANXIETY’ ITSELF – YOU DON’T WANT THE OBJECT OF THE PETTY DESIRE, YOU SIMPLY WANT TO ‘VENT’ THE FEELING OF THAT DESIRE, AS THAT PETTY DESIRE IS AN UNCOMFORTABLE ‘TENSION’ IN YOU.
SO THE PETTY DESIRE IS ANXIETY IN ITSELF, BUT THE EXCITEMENT OF ANTICIPATION AND THE HALO GLOW OF RELIEF OF THAT DESIRE BLIND YOU TO THAT NORMALY BECAUSE THEY ‘OVERWHELM YOU FAST IN THE MOMENT’ – ITS ALL AN ILLUSION, A COMFORTING STORY YOU TELL YOURSELF.
SO THERE IS ‘NO FUN’, ‘NO DESIRE’, IT DOES NOT WORK AS ITS A COMFORT BASED ON SHADES, LEVELS OF ANXIETY, SO ITS ALL ANXIETY WHICH YOU ARE INCREASING BY CALLING IT A DESIRE – YOU ARE ACTUALLY CHASING MORE ANXIETY – PETTY DESIRES ARE MORE ANXIETY. BUT THE ISSUE IS THAT YOU ARE STILL ANXIOUS, AND HAVE NOTHING ELSE TO DEAL WITH THAT ANXIETY ACCEPT THIS DRUG LIKE MECHANSIM, AS YOU ARE STILL A CHILD, AND THEREFORE STILL ‘NEED SOMETHING TO COPE’, SO YOU HAVE TO REPLACE THIS TYPE OF COMFORT WITH A BETTER ONE…
SEE YOU’RE HABITUATED TO THE DRUG-MECHANSIM ITSELF, TO FEELING BAD ‘IN ORDER’ TO FEEL GOOD LATER, SO TO CHANGE, TO GROW UP AS A BIG KID YOU NEED A NEW DRUG = A NEW TYPE OF COMFORT – THE COMFORT OF ‘SUPERIORITY’.
SEE YOU THE KID COMFORTS ITSELF VIA INFERIORITY, OF PETTY DESIRE VS PETTY ANXIETY WHICH CREATES WEAKNESS, WHILST COMFORTING YOURSELF VIA SUPERIORITY CREATES STRENGTH, ENERGY = THE ABILITY TO CHANGE.
SO BE VERY CLEAR – COMFORTING YOURSELF THROUGH PETTY DESIRE IS A FORM OF INSANTITY, TO LIVE IN A DELUSION OF ‘SELF’ AND ‘OTHER’, AND IT JUST GETS WORSE – YOU ARE ‘ALL OTHER’, THERE IS NO SELF, AS YOU HAVE NEVER GROWN UP ENOUGH TO HAVE ONE, YOU ARE A COLLECTION OF ‘TIMES TABLES’ YOU MEMORISIZED AS A KID, EVERYTHING YOU ARE IS ‘OTHER THAN YOU’, IT IS ‘MEMORY’ OF THE TRIAL AND ERROR OF GROWING UP, OF ‘OWNING WHAT YOU ARE TOLD’, EVEN THOUGH YOU HAVE NO FUCKING CLUE WHY YOU NEED TO DO THIS SHIT…
BUT YOU MUST ‘SEE THIS CHILD’ IN YOURSELF, YOU MUST FEEL IT…
RIGHT NOW, SITTING READING THIS YOUR ENTIRE ‘CHARACTER’ IS BASED ON THE FANTASY WORLD YOU INVENTED IN ORDER TO COPE AS A KID, EVERYTHING BEHIND THAT IS INVISIBLE TO YOU, SO YOU ARE ‘SELF DESTRUCTIVE’ = YOU HAVE ‘NO SELF’.
IT IS HARD I KNOW, BUT TAKE A MOMENT NOW TO SEE THAT ALL YOUR JUSTIFICATIONS FOR WHO YOU ARE AND WHAT YOU DO ARE DESIGNED TO SANITIZE, COVER UP WHY YOU ACTUALLY DO IT = THEY ARE FAKE DELUSIONS = SO YOU ARE A FAKE TWAT.
AND ITS NOT EVEN YOUR FAULT – YOU ARE A ‘DOMESTICATED ANIMAL’, YOU ARE WHAT THEY WANT YOU TO BE…
BUT THE WHOLE TRICK TO GROWING UP IS NOT JUST TO KNOW THIS IN RETROSPECT CAUSE SOME CLEVER BASTARD LIKE ME KNOWS HOW TO ‘REACH YOU’, THE TRICK IS TO SEE IT AS IT HAPPENS IN YOU, AS YOU ARE TRIGGERED, IN THE MOMENT…
BECAUSE WHEN YOU DO, YOU WILL UNDERSTAND WHAT TO BE ‘BETTER THAN’ OTHER PEOPLE FEELS LIKE, AS YOU WILL ALSO SEE THE OBVIOUS LITTLE KID IN THEM, MOMENT TO MOMENT – YOU WILL KNOW WHAT THE ‘SUPERIORITY’ OF A GROWN UP FEELS LIKE.
AND YOU WILL NEVER GO BACK TO BEING A KID, AS THEN YOU WILL START TO UNDERSTAND THE ‘POWER’ OF ELITISM ‘TO SAVE YOU FROM YOUR-NO-SELF’ – YOU WILL UNDERSTAND ‘THE POWER OF KNOWING YOURSELF’, THE ONLY REAL COMFORT THERE IS.
BUT YOU CAN ONLY CHANGE YOUR SELF, YOUR TRIGGERS, DEVALUE THEM, WHEN YOU CAN SEE THEM IN REAL TIME, AS YOU WATCH THE TAIL OF SOME LITTLE EMOTIONAL PANG FLASH ACROSS YOUR MIND BEFORE YOUR REACTION ‘COMFORTS IT’, REMOVING IT….
YES, BE CLEAR – AS A CHILD THIS SIMPLE ‘MECHANSIM OF COPING’ MAKES UP YOUR WHOLE MISEARABLE EXISTENCE BECAUSE YOU HAVE NEVER ‘GROWN OUT OF IT’, YOU HAVE NEVER RISEN ABOVE IT, INDEED YOU THINK ITS A GOOD THING, BECAUSE YOU HAVE MADE IT WORK FOR YOU, YOU HAVE ‘FETISHIZED IT’ AS A DRUG. THAT DRUG BLINDS YOU TO THE REALITY OF YOUR NO SELF, YOU CAN ONLY SEE IT IN RETROSPECT, WHEN YOU LOOK AT THE BANAL, THOUGHTLESS PATTERNS OF WHAT YOU DO TO COPE, YOUR CLEVERNESS, WHEN YOU FINALLY SEE THROUGH YOUR ‘CLEVER JUSTIFICATIONS’…
AND ITS ALL TOTAL BOLLOCKS – ALL PETTY DESIRE IS CONTROLLED BY A ‘FELT LACK’ IN THE MOMENT, COVERED OVER WITH THE PROJECTED EXCITEMENT OF SIMPLE ‘RELIEF’, FELT AS ‘ANTICIPATION’ OF THAT SAME PETTY RELIEF – YOU ARE LOST IN ‘MOMENTARY ANXIETY’, CHASING PETTY DESIRES WHICH ARE THE EXACT SAME ‘FEELING OF LACK’, AS YOU HAVE NOTHING ELSE TO DO, NO OTHER ‘POINT’ IN YOUR DAY TO DAY LIFE TO OVERPOWER THIS POINTLESSNESS, THIS NOTHINGNESS OF YOUR LIFE – YOU HAVE NO SUBSTANTIAL, SOLID ‘SENSE OF SELF’.
SO YOU ‘SUFFER’ MORE AND MORE, THE MORE YOU CHASE THOSE DESIRES – YOU FEEL LESS AND LESS ‘SUBSTANTIAL’, AS THAT IS WHAT SUFFERING DOES, ITS BREAKS YOUR WILL, YOUR SENSE OF YOUR SELF, SO ALL YOU CAN DO IS ‘WAIT FOR YOUR REACTION’ TO ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING. SEE, YOU THE CHILD IS SOOOOOOOOO HABITUATED TO THIS THAT 90% OF YOUR LIFE IS SPENT IN THIS ‘STATE OF MIND OF A CHILD’ – CONTINUALLY GENERATING THOUGHTS THAT SEEK ‘TO COPE’ BY THE EGOIC COMFORT OF PETTY DESIRE, CHASING RELIEF FROM YOUR STUPID LITTLE WANKER OF A SELF.
BUT THERE IS NO DESIRE AS A FIXED GOAL, IT IS A TRANSIENT FEELING, ITS PASSESS, SO A CHILD SIMPLY SEEKS TO COPE BY THE ANTICIPATION OF ‘RELIEF IN THE MOMENT’ BY ‘VENTING’, THEN ITS GONE. SO THERE ACTUALLY IS NO SUFFERING, AT ALL, ITS FAKE, YOU THE CHILD INFLICTS THAT ‘LACK OF COMFORT’ ON CONSCIOUS YOU, SO YOU CONSTANTLY ‘NEED TO COMFORT IT’ – IT CONTROLS YOU VIA THE ANTICIPATION OF ‘FIXING’ A ‘FAKE LACK’. AND NO MATTER WHAT YOU DO TO CHANGE, IT ALWAYS CURVES YOU BACK, SLOWLY BUT SURELY, TO WHERE YOU STARTED = YOU ARE ‘NEEDY’ = YOU NEED COMFORT BECAUSE YOUR BACKGROUND MINDSTATE IS ONE OF THE ANXIETY.
YES, HOWEVER MUCH YOU HATE BEING ‘LOST’, YOU TEACH YOURSELF TO ACCEPT IT BECAUSE YOU ‘NEED THAT COMFORT’, THAT IS HOW YOU LEARN AS A KID. SEE THE PASSIVE MINDSET OF A KID IS USED TO ‘LEARN’ THROUGH ‘COPING’ WITH THE ‘ANXIETY OF FAILURE’, USUALLY BY ‘COPYING OTHERS’. SO THAT IS ALL YOU WILL EVER BE IF YOU DON’T GROW UP, A CHILDISH STEREOTYPE, WHO CREATES ANXIETY ‘UNCONSCIOUSLY ON PURPOSE’ IN ORDER TO EXIST AS A ‘FAKE CHARACTER’.
SEE A CHILDS WAY OF LIFE IS THE ‘PATH OF COPING’ WITH FAKE ANXIETY IN THE MOMENT, OVER AND OVER – YOUR EXPERIENCE OF LIFE IS MOMENTARY. SO TO BE SUPER CLEAR – THE TRICK TO UNDERSTANDING YOU THE CHILD IS TO UNDERSTAND THE CON OF ‘MOMENTARY NEEDS’:
AN ADULT DOESN’T HAVE TO COPE WITH ‘MOMENTARY ANXIETY’ – THEY ‘IGNORE’ THOSE MOMENTARY HAPPENINGS AS ‘TRIVIAL’ BECAUSE THEY UNDERSTAND THEY ARE A FAKE ‘CHILDISH ROLE’ THEY HAVE GROWN OUT OF.
BUT YOU DON’T DO YOU – YOU ARE ‘TRIVIAL’, PETTY, MOMENTARY = LOST IN A DAZE OF YOU OWN CONFUSION, AS ‘NORMAL’ – THE ONLY THING YOU ARE MOMENT TO MOMENT IS THE ROLE YOU ADOPTED IN CHILDHOOD – ‘TO COPE WITH THE MOMENT’.
YOU DON’T SEE ITS ALL AN ILLUSION – YOU THE CHILD IS TRAPPED IN A MOMENTARY CONJOB, ‘DESIRING’ PETTY RELIEF FROM ‘ITSELF’, BECAUSE YOUR ANXIETIES ARE SELF-INFLICTED EMOTIONS WHICH YOU COMFORT IN ORDER TO COPE.
SEE BEING A CHILD IS A CIRCULAR TRAP BECAUSE IT THE FUNDAMENTAL MECHANISM A CHILD USES TO DEAL WITH REALITY – YOU DO NOT SEE IT HAPPENING AT THE TIME UNLESS YOU GET VERY SCARED OF YOUR REALITY = YOURSELF.
TO GROW UP YOU HAVE TO REPLACE THAT MECHANISM, BY UNDERSTANDING IT AND THEN DEVALUING IT AS ‘TRIVIAL’, BECAUSE YOU THE CHILD CONTROLS THE BIG THINGS IN YOUR LIFE BY CONTROLLING ALL THE SMALL ONES FIRST – YOU ‘SPIRAL’.
SO YOU FIRST UNDERSTAND THAT ALL YOUR FALSE INSTINCTS ARE SIMPLY AN UNCONSCIOUS ROLE YOU LEARNT TO PLAY AS A CHILD, BEFORE YOU PUT A MUCH MORE EFFECTIVE, DESIREABLE ‘CHARACTER ROLE’ YOU CONSCIOUSLY WANT ‘AGAINST IT’.
THIS ANCHOR OF A BETTER ROLE IS WHAT CONSCIOUS YOU USES TO JUDGE THOSE UNCONSCIOUS URGES AGAINST BECAUSE YOU HAVE UNDERSTOOD THAT THOSE URGES ARE ‘NOT YOU’, AND YOU NOW NEED BETTER ONES TO MOVE FORWARD IN LIFE.
BUT YOU MUST DO THE 2ND PART ‘HARD’, REINVENT YOURSELF, OTHWERWISE WHEN THE ROLE OF YOU THE CHILD STARTS TO CRASH INCREASINGLY BADLY IN YOUR 30S YOU WILL HAVE NOTHING SOLID TO PUT AGAINST IT, NO OTHER OPTION BUT FAILURE.
THIS OFTEN LEADS YOUNGER WOMEN TO GET STUCK IN A DOWNWARD SPIRAL OF ‘NOT CONSCIOUSLY WANTING THE ONLY THING THEY UNCONSCIOUSLY WANT’, SO THEY SPIRAL INTO DEPRESSION AND SELF HARM.
SO TO GROW UP CONSCIOUSLY YOU MUST UNDERSTAND JUST HOW BLOODY FAKE YOU ALREADY ARE…
BUT THIS IS NOT FAKING IT UNTIL YOU MAKE IT, AS YOU WILL ALSO NEED TO DISPOSE OF THIS NEW CHARACTER ROLE IN TIME TO FIND YOUR REAL SELF SPIRITUALITY, THIS CHANGE IS SO YOU UNDERSTAND THAT YOU ARE NOT YOUR ROLES, SO YOU CAN CHANGE THEM. YOU MUST GET, RIGHT NOW, THAT YOUR CHARACTER OF A CHILD IS A LOAD OF TEMPORARY DOG SHIT YOU CAN CHANGE IF YOU WISH, MUCH AS YOU WILL NEED THE ENERGY TO DO THAT IN LATER LIFE, WHICH IS WHERE ‘YOUR BOTTLE’ COMES INTO IT, AS THAT ‘FELT’ SELF CONFIDENCE TO BE WHO YOU WISH IS ALSO REALLY IMPORTANT…
SEE, TO PLAY A ‘NEW’ ROLE CONSCIOUSLY TAKES ‘SELF-CONSCIOUSNESS’, WHAT YOU WOULD CALL ‘PRESENCE’, AND CONSCIOUSNESS IS A THING THAT HAS A QUANTITY, BECAUSE IT IS MADE OF ‘YOUR DISPOSAL ENERGY’ AT ANY GIVEN MOMENT. SO LIKE MOST FOLKS, EVEN AFTER THEY FIGURE OUT THEY NEED TO CHANGE, YOU WILL ONLY TRY AND CHANGE ‘PIECEMEAL’, IN LITTLE BITS AND BOBS, YOU WON’T COMMIT TO CHANGING YOUR WHOLE CHARACTER ROLE BECAUSE YOU STILL NEED ‘SOMETHING’ TO COMFORT YOURSELF IN ORDER TO COPE. YOU GO ON PISSING YOUR ENERGY WAY ON THE COMFORTS OF A CHILD, AND THEN WONDER WHY YOU HAVE NO ENERGY TO CHANGE, SO YOU ARE AN EVEN MORE DELUSIONAL TOOL THAN YOU WERE BEFORE…
SO THE TRICK, WHICH IS HOPEFULLY OBVIOUS BY NOW, IS TO USE THIS COMFORT SEEKING MECHANSIM, THE BASIC PROCESS YOU ‘USE TO EXPEREINCE LIFE’ AGAINST ITSELF, BY MAKING THIS CHANGE BOTH MORE COMFORTING, AND CHOOSING A PARTICULAR TYPE OF CHANGE THAT BUILDS YOUR ENERGY, INSTEAD OF DEPLETING IT, SO YOU HAVE A POSITIVE FEEDBACK LOOP, INSTEAD OF A NEGATIVE ONE. YOUR NEW ROLE MUST BE UNDERPINED, IN ITS ENTIRITY BY ‘BOTTLE’, AS A FELT COMFORT YOU RETREAT TO IN ORDER TO COPE, UNTIL THAT BOTTLE GROWS TO THE POINT THAT YOU START ACTING CONSCIOUSLY, INSTEAD OF JUST REACTING UNCONSCIOUSLY, AS YOU NO LONGER GIVE A FUCK ABOUT COPING WITH OTHER PEOPLES REALITY – 99% OF OTHER PEOPLE ARE THE SAME CHILDISH ANIMAL YOU USED TO BE, SO YOU ‘LOOK DOWN ON THEM’ AS YOUR ‘NEW REACTION’, AS YOU ARE NOW SUPERIOR TO THAT, ‘EMOTIONALLY’.
SO THE REAL TRICK, WHAT MAKES THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN YOU AND THEM IS YOU MUST COMMIT TO THIS AT A SPIRITUAL LEVEL, AT THE LEVEL OF YOUR ‘WILLFUL SPIRIT’ BECAUSE YOU DON’T WANT TO BE A DOMESTICATED ANIMAL ANYMORE, YOU WANT MORE THAN THIS SHITTY LITTLE LIFE OF YOURS – YOU WANT ‘TO KNOW’ YOURSELF, YOUR ANCESTORS CHARACTER. SO TRY AND REMEMBER FOR THE REST OF THIS POST –
THE ISSUE IS THAT YOU ‘CANNOT CHANGE’ WHAT YOU ‘CANNOT SEE’ AS ‘A CAUSE’.
SO UNLESS YOU STOP ‘BEING IT’ YOU CAN’T GROW THE FUCK UP, EVER…
IF YOU HAVE NEVER CONSCIOUSLY GROWN UP, THEN ‘YOU THE CHILD’ IS STILL CONTROLLING YOU, THE VAST MARJORITY OF YOUR UNBIDDEN THOUGHTS, FEELINGS, FEAR/DESIRES/BOREDOMS COME FROM ‘YOU THE CHILD’, SITTING ‘UNCONSCIOUSLY AT THE BACK OF YOUR MIND’. ‘CONSCIOUS YOU’ IS SIMPLY A THIN VENEER TRYING TO MAKE SENSE OF ALL THESE WOODEN, OUT OF DATE AND FRANKLY SELF-DESTRUCTIVE PATTERNS OF ‘COPING WITH MOMENTARY LIFE’ – YOU SIMPLY DON’T KNOW YOU THE CHILD, SO YOU HAVE NO CONTROL OVER YOUR REACTIONS, IN THE MOMENT.
THE KILLER ISSUE IS THAT YOU CANNOT ‘SEE YOURSELF’ – YOU HAVE ‘NO SELF CONSCIOUSNESS IN THE MOMENT OF REACTION‘, SO ALL YOUR ATTENTION IS DIRECTED AT THE FORCED REACTIONS OF ‘YOU THE CHILD’, ‘PROJECTED OUTWARDS’, AS YOUR THOUGHTS.
WHEN YOU ARE SELF CONSCIOUS ‘ENOUGH’ YOU DON’T JUST SEE WHAT YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DO IT, YOU SEE WHY YOU WANT TO DO THAT BEFORE YOU DO IT – YOU SEE THE BANAL EGO-SAFETY OF A CHILD IN IT, AND THEREFORE IT IS EASY TO DISMISS ‘BEFORE YOU DO IT’.
YOU NEED TO ACTUALLY CHOOSE THE ACTIONS OF ‘YOU THE ADULT’, AS ‘A CONSCIOUS CHOICE’ OF ‘WHAT DO I WANNA DO NOW FOR MY BENEFIT’, ‘PROJECTED INWARDS’ AS CONSCIOUS THOUGHTS ABOUT ‘THE POINT OF YOU’, WHAT YOU ‘WANT’ INSTEAD OF COPING WITH WHAT YOU DON’T WANT.
THIS IS HOW YOU PLAY A CONSCIOUS ROLE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CHANGE, IT IS THE ACTUAL MECHANISM OF ALL CHANGE AT AN ANIMAL LEVEL, AS IT IS ACTUALLY THE WAY YOU LEARNT TO ‘BE A CHILD’, BY BEING DESPERATE TO PLEASE THE PEOPLE WHO KEEP YOU ALIVE.
BUT NOW YOU ARE AN ADULT, YOU DON’T NEED TO PLEASE ANYONE BUT YOURSELF, AND YOU THE CHILD FUCKING HATES THAT…
SO WHAT FOLLOWS NOW IS HOW YOU GET YOU THE CHILD HANDS OFF YOUR MENTAL/EMOTIONAL ‘CONTROLS’ BEFORE YOU LEARN HOW TO USE THOSE CONTROLS DIRECTLY, PLAYING A CONSCIOUS ROLE OF ‘BETTER THAN’ YOU, VIA ‘THE COMFORT OF BOTTLE’.
SO ITS TIME TO GET USED TO BEING ‘UNCOMFORTUABLE’ WITH THE REACTIONS OF YOU THE CHILD BY DEFINITION – ITS TIME TO GET SCARED OF EGO SAFETY, ‘CAUSE ITS REALLY NOT THAT SAFE – IN THE MOMENT YOU HAVE NO CONTROL, ALL YOU CAN DO IS WONDER WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED, AFTERWARDS, WHEN ‘THE MOMENT HAS GONE’…
YEP – BEST UNDERSTAND NOW – YOU THE CHILD IS A GUTLESS TWAT, A HOPELESS, HARMLESS PUSSY, FOREVER LOOKING FOR THE EASY WAY OUT, THE CHEAT CODE, THE APPEARANCE OF QUALITY, TO FAKE IT AND COPE BUT ALL THE COMFORTS YOU USE TO COPE ARE DELUSIONS, THEY ARE TOTALLY FAKE, SO YOU ARE TOO. UNDERSTAND NOW, AND I’M TRULY SORRY TO BE ‘THE ONE’ TO TELL YOU THIS, BUT ITS TIME TO GET SCARED, BOTH OF FOLKS LIKE ME, BUT MUCH MORE IMPORTANTLY OF ‘YOU THE CHILDISH SELF’ BECAUSE IT HATES YOU – IT IS KILLING YOU, ‘THE QUALITY OF YOU’ WITH ‘CHEAP LOVE’…
SEE YOU THINK ‘LOVE’ IS CHILDISH COMFORT, LIKE YOU LEARNT AS A CHILD, BUT IT IS SIMPLY THE INVISIBLE BARS ON THE CAGE YOU CANNOT SEE, THE ‘CAGE OF CHILDHOOD’ – YOU ALWAYS CHOOSE TO CLING ONTO THOSE BARS, CAUSE YOU CAN’T COPE WITHOUT THE COMFORTING DELUSIONS OF FAMILIARITY, SO, OBVIOUSLY, WHAT YOU NEED TO GET SCARED OF RIGHT NOW, FIRST AND LAST, IT YOUR OWN FUCKING STUPIDITY…
YOU MUST CHANGE YOUR ‘ATTITUDE’ TOWARD THE CHILDISH FEAR OF EGO SAFETY.
AND YOU MUST DO THIS OUT OF THE GIFTED SELF RESPECT YOU CURRENTLY LACK.
SO, YOU MUST SEE ‘THE BASIC BITCH’ = THE BIG KID = THE HARMLESS FUCK UP IN YOU.
YOU MUST SEE HOW INCONSISTENT, HOW TRIVIAL, HOW COMFORT SEEKING YOUR REACTIONS ARE.
YES, YOU MUST SEE YOU CHOOSE TO DELUDE YOURSELF ON PURPOSE AS A SAD, ‘CLEVER’ MOMENTARY COMFORT.
AND SERIOUSLY, YOU MUST SEE ONLY A GUTLESS DORK COPES BY PRETENDING TO BE CLEVER IN SECRET, OBVIOUSLY.
IT MUST CLICK SO YOU SEE IT IS ONLY ‘THE SECRET BIT’ THAT MAKES IT WORK FOR YOU, ‘IN PUBLIC’ YOU WOULD BE A TOOL.
SO YOU MUST SEE THAT MAKES YOU AN EMBARRISSMENT TO YOUR OWN KIND NOW – YOU ARE TRIVIAL, A NASTY LITTLE THING.
THEN YOU WILL STOP JUST COPING WITH BEING A USELESS SHITSTAIN AND ‘WANT TO’ CHANGE, NOW BECAUSE YOU HATE THAT.
SO YOU MUST LEARN TO REPLACE THE COMFORTS OF A CHILD WITH THE COMFORTS OF ELITISIM.
YOU MUST UNDERSTAND THE EMOTIONAL COMFORT OF BEING ‘BETTER THAN’ YOU, IN THE MOMENT. THEN YOU WILL UNDERSTAND THE VERY PRACTICAL MAGIC OF ‘GROWING UP’ AS ‘POWER OVER YOU THE CHILD’. AND YOU WILL LEARN TO HATE THE GUTLESS ‘FAKE COMFORTS OF A CHILD AS WEAKNESS’ – WITHOUT THIS SWITCH IN YOUR CHOICE OF COMFORTS, YOU ARE FUCKING DOOMED…
WITHOUT THIS SWITCH YOU WILL GO ON COMFORTING YOURSELF FOR THE EMPTY, STEREOTYPICAL, UGLY NOTHING OF YOUR LIFE WITH MORE OF THAT SAME NOTHING, WHICH WILL KEEP YOU STUCK AS NOTHING FOREVER. BUT WHEN YOU TRY THIS CHANGE YOU WILL SEE ‘THE COPING TRAP’ OF THAT ‘REACTION TOWARD MOMENTARY COMFORT’.
YOU WILL SEE THAT THESE ‘COPING DELUSIONS’ ARE JUST A FAKE SUBSTITUTE ‘FOR CHANGE’.
SEE TO BE A CHILD IS TO BE SO UNBELIVEABLY FAKE EVEN YOU CAN’T SEE IT – YOU ARE ‘HYPNOTIZED’.
SO I’M GOING TO HELP YOU WITH THAT TODAY, AS WE HAVE TO BREAK THE SPELL OF ‘YOUR MOMENTS’…
IN THE MEANTIME, JUST FOR THE CRAIC LIKE, TAKE A QUICK LOOK AT ALL YOUR CLEVER, COPING SECRETS, ALL THE CRINGE, ALL THE TWATTINESS IN YOU, THEN TRY AND SEE WHAT THEY HAVE DONE FOR YOU THUS FAR, OUTSIDE OF YOUR ‘CHILDISH MOMENTARY NEEDS’, THAT IS, OUTSIDE OF THE SHIT YOU NEED TO DO TO COMFORT YOURSELF SO YOU CAN ‘COPE’ BECAUSE YOU ARE A GUTLESS PUSSY, A SELF DESTRUCTIVE STREET WHORE…
YES, LETS FACE IT, EH – THE WAY MOST OF YOU LEARNT TO COPE WAS SO SHIT IT DIDN’T EVEN WORK AS A KID, LET ALONE NOW – YOU HAD CRAP, DIS-INTERESTED PARENTS, A BAD PLAYGROUND EXPEREINCE, NO ONE EXPLAINED HOW YOU WERE DIFFERENT TO THEM, WHAT YOUR FEELINGS MEANT, ETC ETC. Not your fault of course, and sure, its maybe ALL YOU KNOW, but ever noticed that none of it REALLY works AT ALL anymore, THAT all your most fundamental, reactive tactics of EGO SAFETY, OF COPING WITH LIFE are just making you an even bigger fuck up, and even more delusional, than you where EVEN yesterday?
Do you wanna know why..? Protecting the ‘fragile ego’ of a child, something that you should of changed multiple times by even your 30s after you have GROWN UP, is a form of ENERGETIC SUICIDE – ITS DRAINS YOUR ENERGY QUICKER THAN ANYTHING ELSE, so you will have a MASSIVE ‘ENERGY DEBT’, with many turning to constant drug use, living in a victim centred fantasy world where nothing is your fault, and worse, mainlining nasty little parasitic behaviours in order to CONTINUE TO COPE with YOUR CHILDISH ‘TACTICS OF COPING’ THAT DON’T FUCKING WORK – NO ONE ELSE IS RESPONSIBLE FOR YOU, NO ONE ELSE REALLY GIVES A SHIT.
This is what 4th wayers call ‘PASSIVE SELF DESTRUCTION’, sleep walking into your very own personal hell, by trying to make THE LIFE OF YOU THE CHILD cool, exciting, ANTI-HEROIC, like a KID IN A PLAYGROUND – BUT ‘ITS ALL IN YOUR HEAD’ (Sorry, Kylie), a whole nasty little collection of COPING DELUSIONS = your UNCONSCIOUS character of NO CHARACTER, OF A FAKE, COPIED SET OF CHARACTER PATTERNS YOU DON’T EVEN FUCKING WANT TO BE.
So lets be honest now, the reason for this DRAMATIC START TODAY is that GROWING UP IN LATER LIFE IS A ‘BIT OF A BASTARD’ – you have built your whole world on top THE MINDSET OF A CHILD, so you are a weak, ever changing, lazy, pointless thing THAT HAS TO FAKE IT EVERYDAY to get by, BECAUSE YOU DON’T KNOW YOURSELF, YOU ARE UNRELIABLE, INCONSISTENT. BUT WORSE OF ALL YOU ARE CONTROLLED BY THE ‘ANXIETY OF A CHILD’ – A SEMI PERMANENT SENSE OF UNEASE THAT SOMETHING IS ‘NOT RIGHT’, sitting quietly, usually un-noticed by conscious YOU, whilst controlling your thoughts, feeling, sensations FROM THE BACK OF YOUR MIND. But YOU, sitting way in the front, ONLY EVER EXPEREINCE THE RESULTS OF THAT CONTROL, YOU NEVER SEE THE ‘WHY’ YOU THINK AND FEEL THAT, you just think and feel whatever reaction is produced by that WHY.
See YOU, ‘CONSCIOUS YOU’, ARE ‘YOU THE CHILDS’ PRISONER, little more than a tame, trusting DOG ON A LEAD – YOUR REALITY IS DEFINED BY WHAT YOU THE CHILD SHOWS YOU, so you never see that ROPE AROUND YOUR NECK, all you have is that vague feeling that SOMETHING IS WRONG. And you are right, its just that what is not right is ‘YOU THE CHILD’, because you ‘KNOW NOT WHAT YOU DO’, or ‘WHY YOU DO IT’, which is one of the many definitions of EVIL, much as it only truly becomes EVIL when you need to take pleasure in the suffering of others through controlling them, however much YOU BLAME THEM, HOWEVER CLEVERLY YOU DECIEVE YOURSELF AND THE WORLD ABOUT YOU TRUE MOTIVES.
So NO MATTER HOW GIFTED YOU ARE THE BEST YOU WILL DO AS A FECKLESS, COMFORT OBSESSED ‘CHILD’ is to get lost in that short-lived ‘FELT’, transient SPIRITUALITY of the POWER OF BEING DESIRED, the POWER OF CONTROL, or maybe the POWER OF BEING FEARED, and that is a very poor ‘runners up prize in life’ – there is more than enough whores, monsters and gangsters in this world, forever racked by their secret little ‘shames’ already, sorry. All very understandable of course, and its not even your fault – YOU ARE A CHILD, YOU ARE IRRESPONSIBLE BY NATURE, so NOTHING IS YOUR FAULT, is it – THERE IS NO YOU TO BLAME, SO OUTSIDE OF YOUR GIFTED SHAME YOU DON’T EVEN FEEL IT…
Now I’m going to briefly ‘break the 4th wall’ and speak directly to some of you WHO HAVE THIS ISSUE IN SPADES (Sorry, Bridge…), much as the whole ‘explaining all the error cases’ thing is frowned upon in teaching circles, THIS ISSUE IS VERY RELEVANT TO TODAY LESSON, TO GROWING UP, BECAUSE IT IS ‘A TEST YOU HAVE FAILED’, like all of us hedonistic types once failed AT THE START. See what you have done is KINK, perverted the ‘USE’ of the ENERGY of ‘FELT SELF-CONSCIOUS’ triggered by ‘3RD PARTY ATTENTION‘. This is actually a KEY PART OF GROWING UP ‘NATURALLY’, A DRIVING FORCE OF GIFTED DEVELOPMENT ITSELF DEGRADED into a form of SIMPLE PLEASURE – ‘THE MASTERING’ OF ‘PERFORMANCE ANXIETY’ but ONLY AS A SOURCE OF TRANSIENT RELIEF = TO COMFORT YOURSELF LIKE A CHILD, RATHER THAN COMFORT YOURSELF AND USE IT TO GROW UP, ‘SPIRITUALLY’, LIKE AN ADULT.
For many of the most mid to highly GIFTED AMONGST YOU IT IS THE ONLY REASON YOU ARE A HEDONIST, as the rest of your upbring did not suit it – IT WAS TRIGGERED IN YOU BY SOMETHING THAT HAPPENED TO YOU ONCE-UPON-A-TIME, AND NOW YOU CAN NEVER GO BACK TO ‘NORMAL LIFE’. You entire mode of existence, YOUR MIND STATE IS UNDERPINNED BY THE CONSTANT SEEKING OF THIS PLEASURE, OF ‘THE EMPOWERMENT OF ELECTRIC ATTENTION’, all day, everyday, AS A COMFORT. See as long as you only ‘SEE IT’ as COMFORT you will never, ever look to develop it, SO YOU THE CHILD WILL MAKE DAMN SURE THAT REMAINS THE CASE BY MAKING ALL ‘NATURAL’ AVENUES TO FURTHER DEVELOPMENT SEEM SCAREY OR BORING ‘ON PURPOSE’, which frankly you really should of been able to work out for yourself by now…
Obviously, most ANIMALS WHO GO THIS ROUTE ARE NOT GIFTED, as it is a VERY ANIMAL PLEASURE WHICH THEY CANNOT DEVELOP BEYOND THEIR BIOLOGY , and so becomes strongly associated with constant drug use, BUT FOR THE GIFTED ITS BECOMES THE ONLY AVENUE YOUR GIFT HAS TO ‘REACH YOU’, AS YOUR GIFT SUPERCHARGES THAT GATEWAY PLEASURE BEYOND ANYTHING AN ANIMAL IS CAPABLE OF. See the key reason no one tells you this is that it LEADS TO THE BELIEF THAT ANIMAL HEDONISM IS ‘GOOD IN ITSELF’, RATHER THAN BEING ‘GOOD AS A GATEWAY TO SOMETHING ELSE’, SOMETHING YOU MUST GET TO AS QUICKLY AS POSSIBLE IF YOU DON’T WANT TO DESTROY YOURSELF, in some trite, formulaic and frankly deeply tedious way – crying all the way to your own little hell whilst secretly loving it – (YAWN).
The way you can (broadly) tell the difference between the animals and the gifted in this sense is simple – GIFTED MAINLINE THE ATTENTION AT A ‘STAR OF THE SHOW’ LEVEL, because they can literally feel that attention as pleasure IN A GRANULAR, ‘QAUNTITY’, they love ‘all eyes on me’ (Sorry, Billie Elish..). Animals experience that self-conscious pleasure ‘secondhand’ as a SPECTATOR, all creepy and hiding at the back, clapping along whilst sniggering at their success, cleverness. An animal only has chemical emotions, substances in their blood stream, and so everything degrades along with the receptors of those substances when abused, everything becomes clogged and therefore more extreme, more perverted in time. BUT GIFTED HAVE HIGHER EMOTIONS, WHICH ARE WAY, WAY MORE POWERFUL, AND THEREFORE WAY MORE TEMPTING TO ABUSE, for the ‘unschooled gifted’ of this world, until you destroy them BY OVER FISHING, BY EXHAUSTING THE STRENGTH OF YOUR OWN SPIRIT AS A ‘FORM OF CHILDISH COMFORT’ YOU DON’T FUCKING NEED – YOU HAVE IT ALREADY.
It is useful to know this mechanism AS THAT is ‘WHAT A PARASITE IS’ – someone who experiences this level of ‘pleasure as comfort’ 2nd hand, as they are not capable of it themselves, because it is USEFUL FOR THE GIFTED TO KNOW AS THAT IS WHAT YOU WILL BECOME VIA HEDONISM, WHEN YOUR ENERGETIC DEBT INCREASES TO THE POINT THAT YOU CAN NO LONGER EXPEREINCE IT DIRECTLY EITHER. THEN YOU BECOME THE HORROR THAT IS A ‘GIFTED PARASITE’, THE ENEMY OF YOUR KIND, a ‘dark, corrupted Elf” that becomes an Uruk-Hai, before descending even further to the level of a Snaga (Sorry, Tolkien..), when you are ‘broken beyond repair’. So many Gifted, SPIRITED FOLKS YOU MEET IN THIS DAY AND AGE SIMPLY HAVE NO IDEA JUST HOW EXHAUSTED THEY ARE, as that is the key stratergy of you the child – the weaker you are the easier it is to OVERWHELM YOU IN THE MOMENT OF YOUR ANXIETY WITH THE NEED FOR COMFORT…
‘So where have I gone wrong then’ you wail, ‘what trick am I missing?’ – EASY, YOU HAVE FAILED TO UNDERSTAND THAT THE FEELING YOU CRAVE IS NOT EXTERNAL ATTENTION IN ITSELF, IT IS SIMPLY ‘TRIGGERED BY ATTENTION’ IN CHILDHOOD, IT IS ACTUALLY THE SELF CONSCIOUS FEELING OF YOUR SPIRIT THAT IS ‘SPUN UP’ BY ATTENTION, AMONGST MANY OTHER THINGS PERSONAL TO YOUR TYPE, IE FROM ‘THE SOURCE’ OF YOUR GIFT ITSELF. So the problem you have NOW is that you have FAILED TO REALIZE THAT YOU CAN TRIGGER THAT ‘FEELING OF EMPOWERMENT’ VIA YOUR ‘OWN ATTENTION’, BY EVOKING IT, you are stuck descending the food chain of animal life trying to chase a false notion of THE TRUTH of that feeling – YOU THE CHILD HAS PERVERTED IT.
See once you have GROWN UP you can USE YOUR ATTENTION TO MAINLINE THAT FEELING ALL DAY, EVERYDAY VIA A SIMPLE MECHANSIM LIKE ‘THE FOCUSED APPRECIATION OF YOURSELF’, of all that is of ‘higher quality’ in yourself, THAT IS ‘BETTER THAN’ OTHERS, including your stuff, the quality of your surroundings, even the NATURE you are standing on ITSELF. THIS IS WHAT THE COMFORT OF ELITISIM ‘IS’ at a starter level, HOW IT IS FELT IN THE NOW – there are many ways to do it, but the one RIGHT FOR YOU IS THE ONE CLOSEST TO YOU GIFT, NOT THE MECHANSIM YOU THE CHILDS USES TO PERVERT YOUR GIFT, WHAT YOU CURRENTLY CRAVE = A FETISH.
I give you this APPREICIATION trigger out of the many other options (often based on the much more DIFFICULT sense of SEXUAL AROUSAL) SIMPLY BECAUSE YOU WILL RECOGNIZE IT VIA ‘NEW AGENESS’, AS IT IS ONE OF THE MOST GENERIC, just don’t forget that this feeling must be alive – you can’t trigger your spirit by simply telling yourself you appreciate something, YOU MUST ACTUALLY FEEL IT, THEN EXPAND IT, MAINTAIN IT, now you know what it is, AND SO know HOW TO work out for yourself how to CONSTANTLY REFRESH IT, MOMENT TO MOMENT, INSTEAD OF ‘GIVING IN’ WHEN YOU THE CHILD FORCES OTHER, UNBIDDEN MOMENTS ON YOU, FORCING YOU TO LET YOUR SPIRIT DROP AWAY FROM YOUR ATTENTION, BECAUSE THAT ‘FEELING NEEDS YOUR SPECIAL ATTENTION’, before it BECOMES ‘BOTTLE’ = YOUR INDEPENDANT NATURE = GIFTED YOU.
Know that ONCE YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT THIS IS ITS EASY – you don’t need to exhaust and poison yourself for ‘MORE ANIMAL ATTENTION’, you need GIFTED ATTENTION, and at the start YOUR GIFT TURNED BACK ON ITSELF IS MORE THAN ENOUGH TO FEEL THAT, TRIGGERED BY ‘YOUR FELT APPRECIATION’, FELT GRATITUDE, OR HOWEVER YOU CHARACTERISE WHAT IS A VERY SPECIAL TRIGGER FEELING TO YOURSELF. Then you can literally walk around with your own ON SWITCH, you don’t need the projected desperation of YOU THE CHILD to always be on the look out for it, AS YOU THE CHILD WILL USE THIS PERVERSION TO KEEP YOU TRAPPED IN NOTHINGNESS FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE, to destroy your mental stability, your health, your looks, YOUR SPIRIT ITSELF. Hedonists are so close to the process of actually GROWING UP SPIRITUALITY ITS ACTUALLY PAINFUL – every time you try it is whipped from your grasp in the last second by YOUR TEDIOUS NEED TO COMFORT YOURSELF EXTERNALLY, LIKE A LITTLE KID, LOST AT THE FAIRGROUND…
This is the killer bit, THE BIT YOU NEED TO GET SO ALL ‘MY BETTERS’ ARE NOT TO BE PROVED RIGHT IN THAT I AM MAKING A MISTAKE IN TELLING YOU THIS – THE KEY WARNING YOU NEED TO GET – if you settle for the use of external triggers for this feeling THEN YOU DAMN YOURSELF TO INCREASINGLY RAPID DECLINE, AS ANY EXTERNAL FOCUS IN YOURSELF DURING THIS FEELING DEPLETES YOU, PARTICUARLY WHEN YOUR SPIRIT IS VERY HIGH OR YOUR BLOOD IS UP THEN YOU ARE POURING YOUR GIFT DOWN THE DRAIN FOR THE PLEASURE OF FEELING IT ‘LEAVE YOU’, BY LINKING/DIRECTING IT OUTWARD.
But when your ATTENTION TRIGGER IS INTERNAL, ON YOURSELF THE ENERGY OF YOUR GIFT IS RECYCLED, DIRECTED BACK ON ITSELF, SO IT ACTUALLY BUILDS. It is VERY IMPORTANT TO GET THIS PLEASE, as otherwise YOU THE SELF DESTRUCTIVE CHILD will simply shrug your shoulders and say, in whatever opportunistic moment occurs to COMFORT YOURSELF – ‘hey, what does it matter HOW I feel this, I may be a fuck up but I feel great in the moment, SO ITS ALL GOOD bitch’. You must FIGHT THIS URGE TO NOT CARE ABOUT YOUR FUTURE AT ALL COSTS, otherwise what I have just said will be your CURSE, FOREVER.
YOU MUST KEEP YOUR ENERGY FOR YOURSELF, AT ALL COSTS – IT IS THE BEST THING ABOUT YOU.
IN TRUTH ITS SO VALUABLE ITS ALL YOU HAVE – ALL THAT SEPARATES YOU FROM A DOMESTICATED, HERD ANIMAL…
BE VERY, VERY, VERY CLEAR – its NOT ALL GOOD TO WASTE YOURSELF, its not THE SAME – THERE ARE 2 WAYS TO DO THIS COMFORTING PLEASURE, A RIGHT WAY TO DO ‘PLEASURABLE SELF-CONSCIOUS’ AND A WRONG WAY TO ACHIEVE ALMOST THE SAME FEELING BUT WITH DRAMATICALLY DIFFERENT RESULTS. DON’T BE SEDUCED BY THE EASY WRONG WAY YOU ALREADY KNOW, PUT THE EFFORT INTO LEARNING THE HARD RIGHT WAY YOU DON’T. I promise you will start to LIVE via the PLEASURE OF POWER OVER YOURSELF IF YOU DO, instead of continuing to DIE via the SECOND PLACE of the POWER OF EXTERNAL ATTENTION, CONTROL, FEARSOMENESS, if not all three = RAPID SELF-DESTRUCTION.
So now we get to it, as to FIGHT OFF YOU THE CHILD IN THE MOMENT YOU NEED TO KNOW WHAT IT IS, not just HOW TO DO IT – THEY ARE CONNECTED…
KNOW AS A BIG KID ‘CONSCIOUS YOU’ IS A ‘PASSIVE MINDSET’ = YOUR CONSCIOUS FRAMEWORK OF ‘ME’ IS FULL OF ‘NOT ME’, IT IS ‘OTHER’.
THIS ‘NOT ME’ IS A COLLECTION OF INVENTED/COPIED BUT NOW UNCONSCIOUS PATTERN REACTIONS DESIGNED TO ‘COPE’ WITH ‘MOMENTARY ANXIETY’ IN CHILDHOOD, WHICH YOU NOW CONSIDER TO BE YOUR CARVED IN STONE ‘CHARACTER’ – IT IS ‘YOU IN THE MOMENT’, AS AND WHEN IT ‘OCCURS TO YOU’.
THE PRIMARY WAY YOU ‘COPE’ IS TO ‘TRY AND COMFORT YOURSELF’ AGAINST ANXIETY, WHICH QUICKLY EVOLVES INTO PATTERNS OF EGO SAFETY – YOUR PATTERNS ‘DEFEND YOU’ BY DEFENDING THEMSELVES, THEIR NEED TO EXIST, SO THEY BECOME SELF SERVING, COMPLEX, STRUCTURAL FANTASIES.
SO THIS ‘YOU IN THE MOMENT’, THE ‘YOU THE CHILD’, TAKES PRIORITY OVER YOU THE ‘THINKING CONSCIOUSNESS’, IT CONTROLS BY ‘INFECTION’. EVEN WHEN THINK UP A ‘REASONED’, ‘HIGH ENERGY GOAL’, YOU STILL CONSIDER ‘YOURSELF’ TO BE YOUR UNBIDDEN REACTIONS TO THAT GOAL, NOT ‘THE GOAL’, BECAUSE YOU ARE THAT STUPID – TO BELIEVE YOUR FALSE INSTINCTS OVER WHAT YOU HAVE ACTUALLY ‘DECIDED’.
IN TRUTH, BECAUSE YOU HAVE NEVER BOTHERED TO DEVELOP A REAL CHARACTER, OR FIND THE ONE YOU WERE BORN WITH SHOULD YOU BE GIFTED, YOU ARE STUCK ‘FEELING’ THAT YOUR TEMPORARY, UNSTABLE, EVERY CHANGING COPING PATTERNS ARE ‘A CHARACTER’, BECAUSE THEY ‘ACT FAST’.
BUT THESE PATTERNS ARE MEANT TO ‘BE SERVANTS’, WHY YOU INVENTED THEM AS BEHAVIOURS DESIGNED TO BE ‘SUBSERVIANT TO YOURSELF WHO FEELS’ TO HELP ‘YOU COPE’ AS A CHILD WITH ‘CHALLENGE’, BUT THEY HAVE ‘GONE ROGUE’, BECOME ‘MULTIPLE, UNBIDDEN THOUGHTS’.
SEE THESE COPING PATTERNS ARE PERSISTENT – ‘WEIGHTED’ WITH THAT ANXIETY, EITHER PAIN/PLEASURE, SO THEY ARE VERY COMPELLING BUT ONLY ‘IN THAT MOMENT’. THEY ‘DEFINE’ YOU BY ‘OVERWHELMING’ YOU IN THE MOMENT – THEY HAPPEN ‘FAST’, BEFORE CONSCIOUS YOU REFLECTS ON THEM.
SO THAT MOMENTARY COPING REACTION BECOMES ‘WHO YOU THE CHILD IS’, SIMPLY BY STRINGING A LONG SEQEUNCE OF THEM TOGETHER. SO PASSIVE YOU JUST ‘WATCHES OUT FOR’ AND THEN ‘ACTS OUT’ YOUR MOST ‘EMOTIONAL REACTIONS’ TO WHAT HAPPENS ‘TO YOU’, WITHOUT NOTICING.
IN CHILDHOOD YOU ACCEPT BEING ‘OBLIGATED’ TO FOLLOW, THINK, FEEL ALL YOUR ‘REACTIONS’, BECAUSE THERE IS ‘NOTHING’ TO STOP THEM, ONLY FEAR, ANOTHER PATTERN. SO YOU ‘GIVE IN’ TO EVERY THOUGHT, FEELING, URGE IN YOURSELF AS IF IT IS GOOD, CORRECT, JUST BY ITS ‘OCCURING’.
BUT ITS NOT GOOD, IT NOT ‘ANYTHING’, IT A FORGOTTEN MEMORY OF WHAT YOU DID LAST TIME, AS A CHILD, TRYING TO COMFORT ITSELF, SO DON’T GET CONFUSED BY THE WORD REACT MEANING A TYPE OF ‘REASONED RESPONSE’ – ITS A ‘GUESS’ THAT BECAME A ‘FALSE INSTINCT’, A BLUNT INSTRUMENT.
SEE YOU REACT THE SAME WAY YOUR KNEE FLEXES WHEN THE DOC HITS IT WITH A HAMMER, YOUR LEARNT PATTERNS HAVE BECOME ‘FALSE INSTINCTS’, WHAT THE MEN IN ‘WHITE COATS’ CALL ‘COMPLEXES’, AND THERE ARE LOTS AND LOTS OF THEM THAT MAKE UP YOUR ‘NO CHARACTER’.
THESE COMPLEXES WORK LIKE A ELECTRONIC SECURITY SYSTEM, FOREVER TRYING TO USE YOUR (NOT SO) LARGE DATA MODEL TO SCAN FOR SIMILIAR THINGS AS ‘THREATS TO YOU’ THAT ‘MIGHT BE TRUE’, LIKE ‘LAST TIME’, WHICH IS WHY ‘FEAR UNDERPINS YOU’, LIKE MOST BIG KIDS.
BUT IT DOES NOT MATTER WHAT HAS CAUSED THAT RED LIGHT TO FLASH, THAT SIREN TO BLAIR SO ANNOYINGLY THAT YOU HAVE TO ‘RELEASE THAT TENSION’ WITH A REACTION, NOW, WHAT MATTERS IS ITS ‘A MOMENT’ THAT HAS MANAGED TO ‘TRIGGER OTHER MOMENTS’ = IT IS ALL ‘TEMPORARY’.
SEE THE REASON THAT BEING IN ‘THE THRALL’ OF ‘THE TEMPORARY’ IS SO BLOODY DEADLY IS THAT YOU CANNOT STOP IT AFTER YOU HAVE ‘NOTICED IT’ – IT HAS ‘ALREADY HAPPENED’, WHAT HAPPENS NEXT IS SIMPLY THE SAME OLD WATERFALL OF COMPELLING CRAP REACTIONS = ALL YOU CAN THINK.
SO YOU LIVE VIA ‘TEMPORARY MOMENTS’, REACT TO ‘TEMPORARY CIRCUMSTANCE’, DECIDE BASED ON ‘TEMPORARY URGES’, AND YOU LOVE IT. TO BE A CHILD AS AN ADULT IS TO BE ‘TEMPORARY’, ‘NO-CONSISTENT-THING’, YOU ACTUALLY DON’T EXIST OUTSIDE OF YOUR REACTIONS, ALWAYS ‘ON ALERT’.
BUT YOU MAY AS WELL BE DEAD, BECAUSE YOU ARE LIVING LIKE ‘THE WALKING DEAD’, WHY SOME US ACTUALLY CALL YOU ‘THE GRATEFUL DEAD’…
AND THATS NOT AN ‘ANTI-HEROIC’ COMPLIMENT – WE ARE CALLING YOU ‘POINTLESS’, HARMLESS, TAME, A DOMESTICATED ANIMAL = FAKE.
BE CLEAR – A ‘CHILD HAS NO CHARACTER’, THAT IS WHY A CHILDISH ADULT IS AN INCONSISTENT ‘FUCK UP’… BUT YOU STILL THINK IT ‘COOL’ TO BE A ‘FUCK UP’, EVEN AFTER READING THIS, AND THATS HOW YOU KNOW YOU ARE STILL ‘A KID’, LOST AND ALONE, TRAPPED IN PATTERNS OF EGO SAFETY THAT DAMN YOU TO REPEAT THE SAME SHIT, THE SAME MISTAKES, THE SAME EVERYTHING, OVER AND OVER AGAIN, FOREVER…
THE KEY PROBLEM IS THAT MOST OF THOSE ‘DOMINANT COMFORTING REACTIONS’ THAT HAVE BEEN ‘LEARNT BY YOU’ IN THE PAST ARE SELF DESTRUCTIVE OUTSIDE OF THE MOMENT YOU USE THEM IN, TO THE POINT THAT EVEN YOU CAN SEE THAT AFTERWARDS. THEY ARE ‘MEMORIES OF COPING IN THE MOMENT’, NOT ‘THE’ TRUTH, NOT EFFECTIVE TACTICS FOR LIFE OUTSIDE OF THAT MOMENT – THEY ARE IMPERFECT, APPROXIMATED, PERVERTED. THE PROBLEM IS ‘THE MOMENT’, BEING OVERWHELMED BY YOUR CHILDISH BULLSHIT ‘IN THE MOMENT’, WHICH DESTROYS YOUR SENSE OF SELF, YOUR ABILITY TO ‘HAVE A CHARACTER’ OUTSIDE OF THAT MOMENT, EVER.
SEE ‘YOU’ TRUST THESE MOMENTARY REACTIONS MORE THAN YOU TRUST YOUR ABILITY TO THINK, EVEN THOUGH ITS OBVIOUS THAT THEY SIMPLY SEEK PLEASURE, RUN FROM PAIN, AND, MOST OF THE TIME, ARE SIMPLY LOOKING FOR SOMETHING EXCITING TO REACT TO IN THEIR CURRENT ‘MOOD STATE’= BORED – ‘THE DESIRE’ TO ‘HAVE A DESIRE’, TO KNOW WHAT YOU WANT, BECAUSE YOU DON’T, DO YOU. SO NOTHING HAPPENS TO YOU, AND NOTHING EVER CHANGES WITHOUT ‘EXTERNAL FORCE’ – YOU ‘REACT’, YOU DON’T ‘ACT’. FOR MANY GIFTED IT IS ONE OF THE MOST SHOCKING THINGS WHEN YOU GET THIS, WHEN YOU SEE THAT YOU HAVE ‘NO CONTROL’ OVER YOUR LIFE AT ALL, WHICH IS WHY TEACHERS SAY YOU ARE ASLEEP, DREAMING – YOUR ‘FATE’ WAS ‘DECIDED IN CHILDHOOD’, BUT YOU WON’T CHANGE, EVEN KNOWING THIS.
YES, TO LIVE IN YOUR MOMENTARY REACTIONS IS EASY, BECAUSE IT TAKES NO EFFORT TO ‘WAIT FOR SOMETHING TO OCCUR TO YOU’, WHICH MAKES IT VERY SEDUCTIVE. SO AS A CHILD YOU NEVER DEVELOP A ‘SENSE OF SELF’ ABOVE ‘YOUR BIOLOGY’ BY MAKING ‘SOMETHING HAPPEN OR STOPPING SOMETHING HAPPENING’ INSIDE YOURSELF. ‘YOU THE CHILD’ JUST WATCHES AND THEN PASSIVELY ‘FOLLOWS THE PATH TO ‘ THE MOST COMFORT IN THE MOMENT’ AS A ‘NO SELF’, WHICH IS WHY YOU NEED TO BE FORCED TO DO IMPORTANT STUFF, INDEED, YOU ACTUALLY WANT TO BE FORCED, AS OTHERWISE YOU WOULD ‘BORE YOURSELF TO DEATH’…
SO TO BE AN ADULT, TO BUILD A ‘SENSE OF SELF’ THAT IS PERMANENT, YOU MUST NEGATE THIS ‘NO SELF’ IN ‘THE MOMENT OF IT APPEARING’ AT THE START, BEFORE YOU REACT TO IT, NOT AFTER – YOU MUST BECOME ‘THE SOURCE’ OF THAT FORCE YOU NEED BY REALIZING ‘YOU ARE EXTERNAL’ TO ‘YOU THE CHILD’, AS YOU THE CHILD IS ACTUALLY A 3RD PERSON IN YOUR LIFE, EVEN FURTHER REMOVED FROM YOU THAN YOUR BIOLOGY, THE 2ND PERSON. THE ISSUE IS ‘THE MOMENT’ OF A ‘CHILDS EXPEREINCE OF LIFE’, THAT YOU MUST FREE YOURSELF FROM BEING ‘COMPELLED IN THE MOMENT’, AS OTHERWISE EVERYTHING, EVEN CHANGE, WILL REMAIN ‘TEMPORARY’ BEFORE BEING CYCLED ROUND AGAIN BY YOUR PATTERNS, SO YOU BECOME TEDIOUS, OBVIOUS, BANAL, AND FRANKLY BORING AS FUCK TO US.
SEE THERE IS NO POINT IN USING SOME NEW AGE CRAP LIKE REMINDING YOURSELF CONSTANTLY ‘WHAT WOULD I DO NOW IF I WAS BRAVE?’- YOU ARE NOT BRAVE, YOU HAVE ‘NO BOTTLE’ OUTSIDE OF YOUR COMFORT CHASING, SO PRETENDING IS A WASTE OF TIME – YOU LIVE IN REACTIONS TO YOUR MOMENTS LIKE THEY ARE FOREVER. BACK WHEN YOU SHOULD HAVE DEVELOPED THAT BOTTLE NATURALLY, WHEN THAT SENSE OF SHAME, OF FAILURE, OF HUMILIATION SHOULD OF BEEN REPURPOSED AS ‘STRENGTH OF CHARACTER’, LIKE ALL ACTUALLY ANIMALS DO TO GROW UP OUT OF YOU THE CHILDISH FAILURE, YOU JUST OVER RODE THAT SHAME, INDEED YOU USED ‘THE FEAR OF IT’ TO OVER RIDE THE BEGINNING OF YOU THE ADULT, INSTEAD OF TAKING THE EASY PATH OF USING IT TO OVER RIDE ‘YOU THE FUCK UP’ BY ‘NEGATING’ YOUR MUCH WEAKER, MUCH MORE CONSCIOUS PATTERNS OF FAILURE, AT LEAST BACK THEN, WHEN YOU ACTUALLY WERE A KID.
BUT THE ISSUE REMAINS – YOU MUST BE CLEAR THAT THE SIMPLE ACT OF THIS NEGATING, OF THIS STOPPING AND SAYING ‘NO, I KNOW BETTER’, IS WHAT YOU THE ADULT IS ‘BUILT OFF’, BEFORE IT CRYSTALIZES AROUND A GOAL, OR TWO, TO BECOME AN ACTUAL CHARACTER THAT IS CONSISTENT BECAUSE YOU KNOW ‘WHO YOU ARE’ BY SIMPLY KNOWING ‘WHAT YOU DON’T WANT’, SO WHAT YOU DON’T WANT ‘TO BE’ WHEN YOU ‘GROW UP’. SHOULD YOU BE GIFTED, YOUR SPIRIT, YOUR ‘HEREDITARY CHARACTER’ WILL THEN SEE YOUR NEW ‘FREEDOM’ FROM ‘YOU THE CHILD’ AND APPEAR IN YOUR MENTAL LIFE – THEN YOU WILL KNOW WHO THE FUCK YOU ARE, AND WHAT YOU ARE MEANT TO DO, COMPELLED TO DO, INSTEAD OF THIS ‘POINTLESS DRIFTING’.
SO YOU MUST DEVELOP A NEW REACTION TO MANAGE YOUR OLD REACTIONS TO ANXIETY WAY BETTER THAN YOU THE CHILD.
YOU MUST CONSTANTLY REFRESH THAT TEMPORARY ‘MOMENT’ CONSCIOUSLY, WITH THE SAME MOMENT YOU HAVE CHOSEN.
YOU MUST USE THE REPETITION OF A SPECIAL MOMENT, THAT HAS THE POWER TO DESTROY ALL YOUR PATTERN MOMENTS.
YOU MUST ‘EAT YOUR OLD SELF’, YOUR REACTIONS AS THEY SAY ON THE 4TH WAY, BY OVERPOWERING IT, ‘CAUSE ITS SHIT…
SEE THE MORE YOU CHASE COMFORT FROM ANXIETY, THEN THE MORE YOU CHASE ANXIETY – THEY ONLY EXIST TOGETHER.
TO GROW UP YOU MUST LEARN THE PLEASURE OF ‘FACING MOMENTARY ANXIETY’ ITSELF AND RUN TOWARD IT = ‘BOTTLE’.
THEN YOUR ‘INFERORITY COMPLEX’ OF PETTY ANXIETY MATCHED WITH PETTY COMFORTS WILL LITERALLY DISAPPEAR.
SO YOUR PETTY ANXIETIES WILL NO LONGER BY SCARY, AND YOUR PETTY COMFORTS WILL NO LONGER BE PLEASURABLE.
THEN YOU WILL SEE THE BRUTAL TRUTH – THEY WERE NEVER ‘BAD OR GOOD’ – ITS ALL A CON PLAYED ON CHILD BY ITSELF.
THEN YOU CAN ESCAPE THE TRAP OF BEING A BIG KID, OF BEING ‘NO-THING’, BECAUSE IT WILL LOOK LIKE ‘MADDNESS’.
AND ALL YOU REALLY HAVE TO DO IS ‘BE STILL, BE PATIENT’ WITH YOUR OLD SELF OF ‘NO SELF’, BY SEEING ITS ‘NOT YOU’, NOW…
SADLY YOU CAN’T DO THAT WITH THE PATTERNS OF ‘YOU THE CHILD’, SO CHILDREN ‘ARE GROWN UP’ BY ‘EXTERNAL SHOCKS’.
BUT YOU WON’T DO THAT, BECAUSE YOU THE CHILD ‘DON’T WANT TO’, SO YOU CAN’T ‘GROW YOURSELF UP’ AS A ‘BIG KID’.
SEE YOU HAVE FAILED TO GROW UP MULTIPLE TIMES SO YOU HAVE NOW ‘CONVINCED YOURSELF’ YOU DON’T WANT TO.
THE ONLY WAY TO ACHIEVE IT IS AS ‘A POWERFUL SIDE EFFECT’ OF ATTAINING SOMETHING ‘ELSE’ THAT FEELS ‘COMFORTING’.
SO YOUR PROCESS IS STILL COMFORTING, BUT ON A WHOLE OTHER LEVEL – BOTTLE = THE ‘BETTER THAN’ OF ‘ELITISM’.
SEE ELITISM IS NOT A GOAL, YOU WANT ‘THE EFFECT OF ELITISM’, YOUR GOAL IS WHAT IS ON ‘THE OTHER SIDE’ OF ELITISM.
AND, HOWEVER FAR THIS IS AWAY, JUST SO YOU KNOW, THAT GOAL IS ‘THE POWER TO BE OF SERVICE’.
SURE, AS A CHILD THAT ANXIETY OF ‘NOT KNOWING’, OF BEING DEPENDENT, OF BEING CONTROLLED IS NATURAL, NESSECARY TO LEARN BECAUSE YOU HAVE TO LEARN TO SURVIVE AS AN ANIMAL, WHICH ALL CHILDREN START OUT AS NATURALLY. BUT AS AN ADULT IT IS ‘THE KISS OF DEATH’ ITSELF – IT IS TO BE A SLAVE TO EVERYTHING THAT IS ‘WRONG WITH YOU’, BECAUSE YOU DID NOT KNOW ANY BETTER AT THE TIME, AND YOU HAVE NOW CHOSEN TO ‘STOP LEARNING’. SO YOU THE CHILD IS STUCK BEING A CHILD, WITH THE MINDSET OF A CHILD, THE ‘NO GOAL’ OF A CHILD – COMFORT OF ‘EGO SAFETY’.
SEE THE BIG ISSUE WITH ‘COPING’ AS A STRATERGY FOR LIFE IS YOU THINK ITS ‘SAFETY’ VS ANXIETY AND ‘GOOD’ VS DISCOMFORT, BUT ITS ACTUALLY ONLY SAFE AND GOOD FOR ‘TWAT YOU THE CHILD’. THE BRUTAL TRUTH IS SIMPLE – WHEN YOU ARE PASSIVE, WEAK, UNABLE TO DO EXTERNAL, LET ALONE INTERNAL CONFLICT, THERE IS ‘NO YOU’, AND THERE NEVER WILL BE UNTIL YOU ‘GROW UP’. YOU ARE WHAT FOLKS LIKE ME CALL A FUCK PUPPET, CAUSE YOU ARE CONSTANTLY FUCKED BY EVERYONE AND EVERYTHING, WHICH YOU WANT IN THE MOMENT BECAUSE IT ‘COMFORTS YOU’, AT LEAST FOR A MOMENT OR 2, BEFORE YOU FEEL EVEN WORSE LATER, WHEN YOU BRIEFLY ESCAPE THAT MOMENT = PASSIVE SELF DESTRUCTION.
SEE THIS CLEARLY NOW BY TESTING IT IN YOUR OWN HEAD – YOU ARE STUCK LIVING BETWEEN ‘BEING-IN-ITSELF’ LIKE A CHILD, AND ‘BEING-FOR-ITSELF’, LIKE AN ADULT (Sorry, Existentialism) – YOU CAN ONLY EXPEREINCE 1 THOUGHT AT A TIME = ALWAYS YOUR STRONGEST, EMOTIONAL REACTION. Even worse, YOU ARE THEN FORCED TO ‘DELUDE’ YOURSELF, ENGAGING IN THE ‘BAD FAITH’ OF DENYING THE FACTS YOU SIMPLY DON’T WANT TO BE TRUE, UNTIL THEY DISAPPEAR FROM YOUR ‘CONCEPTUALIZATION’ OF REALITY, EVEN THOUGH THEY ARE STILL VISIBLE TO EVERYONE, WHO SIMPLY LAUGH AT YOUR STUPIDITY, AND THEN USE IT FOR THEIR OWN BENEFIT. YOU ARE A CHILD, AND THE KEY DEFINITION OF A CHILD IS THEIR REALITY IS A ‘MANAGED FANTASY’, BECAUSE THEY ‘PREFER IT TO THEIR REALITY’…
SEE YOU HAVE TO CONVINCE YOURSELF THE FACTS ARE DIFFERENT SOMEHOW OUT OF THE KEY ‘DESIRE-OF-A-CHILD’ = TO CONTINUALLY SEEK TO COMFORT YOURSELF IN THE MOMENT OF YOUR ANXIETY, SO MUCH SO THAT YOUR CONSCIOUSNESS EVENTUALLY BLANKS ANY FACT THAT CONTRADICTS THIS = FANTASY WORLD. AND UNLESS YOU ARE ‘DRAGGED OUT OF IT ‘ BY ‘THE HAIR’ THERE IS NO WAY YOU CAN EVER GET UNSTUCK BY YOURSELF, IN LATER LIFE – SEE THOSE AUTOMATIC PATTERNS OF THOUGHT ARE ALL YOU HAVE TO WORK WITH, SO ROUND AND ROUND YOU GO, CIRCLING THE DRAIN, BECAUSE YOUR ATTEMPTS TO ESCAPE ARE CONTROLLED BY THOSE SAME REACTIONS.
KNOW WHEN YOU ARE PASSIVE, STUCK ON AUTOMATIC PILOT, TRUSTING YOURSELF LIKE A FOOL, YOUR THOUGHTS ARE ‘YOUR MASTER’, BUT YOUR MASTER IS A STUPID, BORED, LAZY CHILD, PRONE TO ‘MOMENTARY’ OUTBURSTS OF INVENTED ‘OVER REACTION’ SO IT ‘FEELS BETTER’, AND THEREFORE FUCKS UP YOUR LIFE, YOUR DEVELOPMENT, YOUR EVERYTHING ‘ON PURPOSE’ IN ORDER TO MAKE THAT FEELING OF ‘A BIT BETTER’ NOW, AND AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE, ALL DAY EVERY DAY. YET YOU KNOW NOTHING OF THIS, SEE NOTHING, BECAUSE YOU ARE NOTHING ‘ELSE’, OTHER THAN YOUR REACTIONS, AND YOUR REACTIONS CAN’T SEE YOUR REACTIONS IN THE MOMENT, ONLY YOU CAN SEE THEM BY STOPPING FOR A SECOND BEFORE YOU ‘ACT THEM OUT’, BUT YOU CAN’T CAN YOU, NOT WITH THE STRONGER ONES, UNLESS YOU ARE AFRAID OF WHAT WILL HAPPEN IF YOU DO = EXTERNAL FORCE…
YES, YOU THE CHILD IS AN ‘EMOTIONAL DRUG ADDICT’, AND HAS MADE THIS APPALLING, DEGENERATE APPROACH TO A LIFE OF EMPTY ‘COMFORTERS’ YOUR ‘TRIVIAL NORMAL’. BUT LOOKING FROM THE OUTSIDE IN, LIKE WE DO, ANY FOOL CAN SEE THAT TO BE A KID AS AN ADULT IS A FORM OF INSANITY, BECAUSE YOU ARE UNAWARE OF BOTH ‘WHAT YOU ARE DOING’, AND ‘WHY YOU ARE DOING IT’, THE REAL, EGOIC PURPOSE OF THAT REACTION – YOU ARE A FUCK PUPPET, LIVING IN A CAGE OF ‘EGO SAFETY’, YOU LITERALLY DON’T SEE ANYTHING ELSE ANYMORE, ANY OTHER OPTION, DO YOU, YOU CAN’T EVEN THINK OF OTHER OPTIONS, AS YOU THE CHILD HAS REMOVED THEM FROM YOUR ‘CONCEPTULIZATION OF THE MOMENT’…
Wanna know why – YOU HAVE NO SENSE OF SELF ‘TO BE RESPONSIBLE TOO’, do you, ‘YOU LITERALLY DON’T CARE ABOUT YOU’, in the 3rd PERSON, as YOU DON’T EXIST AS A SOLID, STABLE THING IN THE 3RD PERSON, your experience of life is moment to moment, YOU ARE YOUR REACTIONS IN THE MOMENT, and the NEXT MOMENT, and then the NEXT MOMENT, ever changing, ever circling THE SAME DUMB SHIT AS YESTERDAY…
So its best to know this now –
GROWING UP MEANS YOU HAVE TO ‘LEARN’ TO BE AN ADULT INSTEAD OF A CHILD – YOU CHANGE BY ‘EVOLVING’ OUT OF OLD YOU.
BUT GROWING IN LATER LIFE MEANS YOU ‘ALSO’ HAVE TO ‘UNLEARN’ THE PASSIVE MINDSET OF ‘FAKE YOU’ THE CHILDISH ADULT, THE TRAINWRECK.
AND YOU HAVE TO DO BOTH THESE DISTINCTLY DIFFERENT THINGS AT THE SAME TIME, OTHERWISE THE LACK OF THE OTHER ONE WILL STOP YOU.
SEE NO MATTER HOW DUMB AS FUCK YOU THE CHILD IS, IT IS VERY, VERY GOOD AT STOPPING YOU CHANGING BECAUSE IT IS ‘VERY PERSISTENT’. SO YOU MUST RECOGNIZE NOW THAT IT IS ‘YOUR WEAKNESS’ THAT IS THE ROOT OF ALL YOU PROBLEMS = YOU ARE ‘EASY’, ‘VUNERABLE’, ‘TRIVIAL’.
YOU ARE PASSIVE, YOU DON’T EVER DECIDE ANYTHING ONCE AND FOR ALL = FECKLESS.
YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW WHAT BEING ‘RUTHLESS’ FEELS LIKE, BUT BY THE TIME THIS POST IS OVER YOU WILL DO, TRUST ME.
Yes, being a child as a GROWN UP is an ODD THING, a silly thing, a pointless thing, a powerless thing, yet ALL YOU SEE IS THE SUFFERING THAT COMES FROM THIS CHANGE of taking RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOURSELF, as you must deny yourself all your CHILDISH FUN in order to mature, CAUSE YOU ARE THAT STUPID. YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND THAT GROWING UP MAKES YOUR LIFE BEARABLE ALL BY ITSELF, so you don’t need YOUR EMPTY CHILDISH COMFORTS to make it BEARABLE for a moment or 2, so your ‘GROW OUT OF THEM’ = AN ADULT STATE OF MIND IS BASED ON MANAGING ‘THE POWER OF RESPONSIBILITY’, A CHILDS STATE OF MIND IS BASED ON MANAGING ‘THE WEAKNESS OF ANXIETY’, so they are FUNDAMENTALLY DIFFERENT, just as you will be when you GROW UP.
Obviously, here is no real harm in going through these PHASES WHEN YOU KNOW NO BETTER AS A KID, WHEN YOU STILL HAVE THE ENERGY LEVELS TO RECOVER YOURSELF, when you are AN ACTUAL CHILD – all very ‘Prince Hal’ I know – but YOUR JOURNEY to a GIFTED LIFE has to start with the recognition that they are ALL FORMS OF SELF SABOTAGE AS AN ADULT, which obviously ENDS IN ‘HUMILIATING’ SELF DESTRUCTION. Sadly, I doubt anyone is going to thrust the UNWANTED responsibility of RUNNING THE NATION and FIGHTING THE FRENCH on you out ‘of the blue’, so YOU are going to have to find another way of MOTIVATING YOURSELF TO DO ‘IT’ – WE HAVE TO FIND ANOTHER WAY OF TAKING ‘THE PISS OUT OF YOU’, as a comedy ‘bag of tennis balls’ sent by the Dauphin to humiliate YOU in front of your COURT ain’t going to change little old you into the GOD KING who was HENRY V, is it…
So consider this as a starter for 10, TO HELP CLEAR YOU HEAD OF THE POINTLESS, TRIVIAL NOISE OF YOUR CURRENT EXISTENCE – do you not ALREADY find that your constant need to be ‘NAUGTHY’ IN ORDER TO MAKE YOUR LIFE A BIT MORE BEARABLE JUST ‘SADASS’ AS FUCK YET, A BIT PATHETIC, TRIVIAL, PETTY and well… just plain DELUSIONAL AT YOUR AGE? WHEN YOU LOOK BACK AT WHAT YOU HAVE DONE CAN YOU ACCEPT THAT IT WAS BASED ON A FELT, URGENT DELUSION THAT YOU DON’T EVEN BELIEVE NOW, SITTING HERE READING THIS, BECAUSE IT WAS ‘MOMENTARY PANG OF EMOTION’, WHICH PASSED, REALLY QUICKLY – THE SIGNATURE OF ALL MENTAL AND EMOTIONAL CONS = THEY ARE TRANSIENT.
DO YOU SEE THAT NOTHING ABOUT WHAT YOU WANT IS FIXED, PERMANENT, STABLE, ‘REAL’, PART OF ANYTHING THAT LOOKS LIKE ‘A CHARACTER’ = YOU SEE ITS ALL AN ‘ILLUSION IN THE MOMENT’ DESIGNED TO CONTROL YOU, THAT YOU DON’T WANT OR NEED, AND THAT WILL PASS IF YOU SIMPLY STAND AGAINST IT A FEW TIMES?
So given the HORROR OF THAT REALIZATION, would you rather not BE a ‘Good’ Bad Bitch instead, a BETTER THAN, rather than continuing to roll with the trite, ‘EVERYDAY’ mediocrity of a ‘Good Girl Gone Bad’, of your ‘WORSE THAN’? See when we have broken all this ‘kiddy’ crap down, ‘we’ can put all those pieces back MUCH STRONGER, REBUILD THAT FRAGILE ‘VASE’ of your ‘SENSE OF SELF’ with MOLTEN GOLD, like some expert in the Japanese ART OF ‘KINTSUGI’ fixing your CRACKS WITH PRECIOUS METAL, so you can then wear those SCARS with the HUMBLE PRIDE of ‘TRUE BEAUTY’, ‘BETTER THAN’ YOU HAVE EVER BEEN BEFORE – YOUR WEAKNESS TRANSFORMS INTO YOUR STRENGTH…
But maybe that is all a bit too Zen for little old you, lost in the FAKE world of FAKE LOVE (or THE RELIEF in any type of ANIMAL EMOTION) being ‘THE ANSWER’ to SOME OF YOUR SHIT OR OTHER, hence stuck in the tiny little existence defined by the COMFORT, OBLIVION AND CHEAP THRILLS of a CHILD, so lets cut to the chase shall we, AS ITS TIME TO GET THE BLOODY SLEDGE HAMMER OUT, BITCHES. Sorry, an all, but if you’re an egomaniac who gets offended easily like some FLAKEY coke whore, then best stop reading now I’d say – THIS STUFF IS GOING TO BITE YA, cause it HAS TO. See that YOU HAVE TO GET OVER TRYING TO BE ‘CLEVER’, of your ‘hookup codes’, of your ‘attention seeking’, of your ‘dog whistles’, of your fake self presentation/preservation that is ‘the social media mindset’, by SEEING WHAT A ‘CHILDS LEVEL OF ‘CLEVER’ MEANS:
A CHILD CONSTANTLY NEEDS EMOTIONAL COMFORT, SO A CHILDISH ADULT MAKES ‘FAKE COMFORT’ ITS GOAL.
SO YOU NEED ‘FAKE COMFORT’ AS ‘THE GOAL’ OF YOUR ‘STATE OF MIND’ BECAUSE YOU ARE ‘DESPERATE’, ALL THE FUCKING TIME…
WITHOUT THE DISTRACTION OF SOME OTHER SHORT-TERM GOAL BEING FORCED ON YOU, YOU ARE A LAZY, BORED, COMFORT-SEEKING FUCK UP…
TRY AND UNDERSTAND THIS VERY SIMPLY – WITHOUT AN ADULT SENSE OF SELF YOU SIMPLY CRAVE COMFORTING ‘NOTHINGNESS’ AS A ‘CHARACTER’.
SO YOU HAVE NO CHARACTER, YOU ARE A SET OF REACTIVE PATTERNS YOU JUST FOLLOW WITHOUT ANY THOUGHT WHATSOEVER = BASIC BITCH.
SHOULD YOU BE GIFTED THE ACTUAL CHARACTER YOU WERE BORN WITH IS COMPLETELY SUBMERGED UNDER THIS ACQUIRED, LOW-QUALITY B/S.
AND THERE IS NO SUBTLY IN THIS – YOU HAVE ‘NO INDIVIDUALITY’ AT ALL, YOU ARE A STEREOTYPE, ONE OF MILLIONS, AND IF YOU ‘STOP THINKING’ AUTOMATICALLY YOU THE CHILD DISAPPEARS, AND YOU WILL NOT KNOW YOURSELF ANYMORE, WHICH IS WHY ‘IT’ WON’T LET YOU STOP…
YES, GIFTED ‘OVER THINKING’ IS THE PRIMARY WAY A CHILD STOPS YOU CHANGING, PARTICUALRY WHEN IT SEES ANYTHING COMING THAT LOOKS LIKE ITS DOOM, ANYTHING THAT HAS THE POWER TO CHANGE YOU EXTERNALLY – IT MUST STEER YOU BACK TO YOUR HIGHWAY TO HELL TO SURVIVE.
SO IT’S REALLY USEFUL TO GET THIS NOW – YOU ARE NOT THINKING YOUR THOUGHTS IN THE MOMENT, THEY ARE RETRIEVED FROM THE MEMORY OF WHAT YOU USUALLY DO/SAY/FEEL IN SIMILAR SITUATIONS BY YOUR EMOTIONS, BURNT INTO YOUR UNCONSCIOUS, THE BACK OF YOUR MIND, AS A CHILD.
OVERTIME YOU BECOME TOTALLY DEPENDENT ON YOUR PATTERN REACTIONS TO FEEL ANYTHING, AS YOU START TO SUFFER INCREASING LEVELS OF CONFUSION, ANXIETY UNTIL YOU TURN INTO SOME OLD ONE WHO NEEDS THE RADIO ON JUST TO EXIST, TO FEEL ALIVE BY THE THOUGHTS IT GENERATES, OTHERWISE THERE IS JUST THE BACKGROUND DREAD OF ‘EMPTINESS’, WHAT THEY CALL ‘EXISTENTIAL DREAD’.
BY ‘NOT THINKING’ I MEAN THE A BIG DIFFERENCE BETWEEN LOGIC, A PROCESS OF DISCRIMINATION, AND QUESTIONING ‘THE FACTS’ AS POSSIBLY JUST ‘FAKE INSTINCTS,’ BEFORE YOU RECONSIDER AGAINST THE BIG PICTURE, AS ‘HOW YOU THINK’ (SPIRITUAL ‘DOUBT’), WHILST silly little YOU SIMPLY REPEATS A REVOLVING SEQ OF WORDS/FEELINGS ON AUTOPILOT, LIKE A CHILD CHANTING THE MULTIPLICATION TABLES IN ORDER TO REMEMBER THEM. THAT IS HOW THE NO CHARACTER OF A CHILD DEVELOPS – A SET OF ‘LEARNED FACTS’ THAT BECOMES YOUR ‘UNCONSCIOUS TRUTH’ = ‘NO CONSCIOUS THINKING’ = ‘NO CHARACTER’ = ‘UNCONSCIOUS CONTROL’.
SO THE CHARACTER YOU THINK YOU HAVE IS SIMPLY THE ‘AUTOMATIC PAROTTING’ OF OTHER PEOPLES OPINIONS YOU HAVE COPIED, THERE IS NO THOUGHT, NO ‘PROCESS OF THINKING’ AT ALL BECAUSE THERE IS ‘NO YOU’ TO THINK, IT’S ALL JUST ‘EMOTIONALLY WEIGHTED MEMORISATION’, JUST EGO, THAT YOU HAVE LONG FORGOTTEN THE REASON FOR – WHY ITS CRUCIAL TO TAKE THE TIME TO FIND ‘YOUR BOTTLE’, AN ACTUAL ‘YOU’ TO THINK AGAINST THE ‘STEREOTYPICAL FALSE INSTINCT’S’ OF FAKE YOU, THE CHILD.
NOW THIS IS ALL VERY HARSH I KNOW, so take a moment to BURN THIS ‘TEACHER SECRET’ INTO YOUR MIND –
ALL THIS HARSHNESS TODAY IS MEANT TO ENERGIZE YOU BOTH ‘HARD’ AND ‘FAST’.
I have to GIFT YOU some temporary strength TO CHANGE YOUR MIND ABOUT WHO ARE THE HEROES AND THE VILLAINS IN YOUR SAD LITTLE LIFE, and so make you much STRONGER, NOW, TODAY, AS YOU READ THIS, AS OTHERWISE YOU THE CHILD WILL STOP YOU READING ANY FURTHER IN A MIN OR 2.
DO YOU UNDERSTAND – YOU ARE ALREADY TOO WEAK TO DO ANY OF THIS WITHOUT HELP?
SEE YOU ARE TOO BLOODY WEAK TO CHANGE IN YOUR CURRENT CONDITION, WHICH IS WHY YOU ALWAYS FAIL WHEN YOU TRY – NO ONE EVER FORCED YOU TO GROW UP DID THEY, YOU HAVE NO CLASS, SIMPLY BECAUSE WE HAVE NO CLASS SYSTEMS ANYMORE – YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND WHAT BEING STRONG MEANS, WHAT STRENGTH EVEN IS MENTALLY, do you – SO GET THIS:
THE MOST FUNDAMENTAL PREMISE OF ALL CHANGE AT AN ANIMAL LEVEL IS REJECTING WEAKNESS FOR STRENGTH AS A ‘CONSCIOUS CHOICE’.
YOU MUST ALWAYS CHOOSE STRENGTH IN ALL YOU DO, TOO ‘NEVER GIVE IN’, TO NEVER SURRENDER TO YOUR PETTY FEARS, AS THEY CYCLE AND BUILD IN THE BACK OF YOUR MIND.
So I’M NOT JUST BEING CRUEL TO BE KIND, NOT JUST SHOWING YOU ‘THE STREETS OF LONDON’ SPEECH – THIS IS ACTUALLY NESSECCARY, OK?
THE VAST MARJORITY OF GIFTED WHO NEVER GET TO KNOW THEMSELVES ARE DAMNED BY THEIR ‘WEAKNESS OF NO CHARACTER’, THE WEAKNESS OF COMFORT, OF THE PETTY PLEASURES OF A FARM YARD ANIMAL, BUT YOUR COMFORT JUST MEANS LESS ANXIETY, FOR A MOMENT, THEN MORE ANXIETY…
SO HERE IS YOUR FUNDAMENTAL ISSUE – YOU, AS A CHILDISH ADULT, ARE A ‘COWARD’.
BUT YOU DON’T SEE THAT, YOU THINK YOU ARE BRAVE, CLEVER, CUNNING, OFTEN IN THE WAYS YOU RUN TOWARD ‘YOUR DESIRES’, WHICH ARE IN FACT JUST KIDDY ‘COMFORTERS’, LIKE the ‘DUMMY’ TO ‘SUCK LIKE A BABY’.
SO LETS BE VERY PRACTICAL NOW AND MAKE THIS CLEAR IN AN EVERYDAY WAY:
TO RUN TOWARD YOUR PETTY DESIRES, AWAY FROM YOUR PETTY FEARS, AND ACCEPT YOUR PETTY BOREDOM = WEAKNESS = GUTLESS LITTLE KID.
TO RUN AWAY FROM YOUR PETTY DESIRES, TOWARD YOUR PETTY FEARS, AND REJECT YOUR PETTY BOREDOM = STRENGTH = A GIFTED ADULT.
WEAKNESS IS COWARDICE = EVER INCREASING ANXIETY = INFERIORITY COMPLEX.
STRENGTH IS COURAGE = EVER INCREASING CONFIDENCE = SUPERIORITY COMPLEX.
STRENGTH + ENERGY = ‘BOTTLE’ = THE ‘BRAVERY TO DO’ INSTEAD OF ‘JUST REACT’.
SO KNOW NOW – ANY PLEASURE TAKEN IN WEAKNESS IS A PERVERSION OF YOUR SOUL, A CANCER YOU ONCE ACCEPTED AS A CHILD AND TAUGHT YOURSELF TO MAKE THE BEST OF = YOU NORMALIZED IT, BECAUSE YOU THOUGHT YOU HAD TO.
SO NOW YOU MUST ‘CHANGE YOUR MIND’ BY ACCEPTING THIS ONE VALUE, THIS ONE DESIRE, AS ALL THERE ‘IS’:
ABOVE ALL THINGS YOU DESIRE TO BE STRONG – YOUR NO 1 DESIRE IS TO FEEL YOUR ‘BOTTLE’.
BUT HOW CAN YOU DO THIS AS A WEAK, FECKLESS CHILD, WHO FAILS EVERYTHING BEFORE THEY EVEN BEGIN? EASY…
BURN INTO YOUR MIND THAT STRENGTH IS THE ‘ONLY TRUE COMFORT’ FOR ANXIETY AS AN ANIMAL.
THEN YOU CAN TRICK YOU THE CHILD INTO BUYING INTO THIS GOAL, LONG ENOUGH FOR IT TO START WORKING, AND YOU WILL SEE JUST HOW WEAK, EXHAUSTED AND ANXIOUS YOU ACTUALLY ARE – FEELING YOUR ‘SENSE OF BOTTLE’ MAKES YOU STRONGER.
YOU ‘DESIRE STRENGTH’ AS THE ULTIMATE ‘FORM OF RELIEF’ = OVERARCHING LIFE GOAL OF POWER.
AND YOU NOW ‘FEAR COMFORT’ AS THE ULTIMATE ‘FORM OF WEAKNESS’ = ARCH ENEMY OF ANXIETY.
IN TRUTH THIS IS YOUR VERY FIRST ‘BETTER THAN’, THE ONE THAT ENABLES ALL THE REST.
BUT TAKE ‘HEART’ – THERE IS NO NEED TO ‘GRIND THIS OUT’, NO NEED TO SUFFER FROM ‘YOU THE CHILDS’ SUFFERING, AS ITS NOT YOU IN THAT MOMENT OF OVERPOWERING IT, OTHERWISE YOU COULD NOT OVERPOWER IT – THIS IS HOW YOU MAKE THE SWITCH BETWEEN WHO YOUR CONSCIOUSNESS ‘FOLLOWS’, YOUR POWERFUL SPIRIT OR YOUR GUTLESS KID.
SEE THE ROOT OF YOUR BOTTLE IS YOUR SPIRIT, AND I CAN TEACH YOU HOW TO ‘BE SPIRITED’ IN ALL THINGS, EVEN AT AN ANIMAL LEVEL, SO YOU FEEL SEPARATE TO THAT CHILDISH SUFFERING, YOU CAN REJECT ‘THE VALIDITY’ OF IT AS ‘FAKE, TRIVIAL’. INDEED, THAT ‘SPIRITNESS’ IS WHERE THE ENERGY YOU NEED TO DO THIS, COMBINED WITH YOUR MENTAL STRENGTH TO THINK DIFFERENTLY, PROPERLY, WILL COME FROM, QUICKLY AND EASILY.
THIS IS HOW ‘BOTTLE’, BY BOTH ITS ‘DEVELOPMENT AS A FEELING’ AND ITS ‘USE AGAINST YOU THE CHILD’, CAN COMBINE THE X2 THINGS YOU NEED TO DO TO GROW UP TOGETHER, RELATABLY, CONSCIOUSLY, THAT IS THE GENIUS OF IT.
KNOW THE ABILITY TO DEVELOP STRENGTH FAST COMES FROM CONSCIOUS ACTION AGAINST UNCONSCIOUS COMPULSION – THERE IS NO NEED TO BE A SUPERHERO DAY 1, THE FASTEST WAY TO DO THIS, AND SEVERAL OTHER VERY USEFUL THINGS, IS ‘TO ACT’ BY ‘NOT REACTING’ LIKE YOU USUALLY DO, INDEED TO NOT BOTHER REACTING ‘AT ALL’. THEN WE CAN GET YOUR TRAINING FREQEUNCY UP TO THE MEANINGFUL LEVEL OF REPETITION YOU NEED TO DO THIS, LIKE EVERYDAY, AS MUCH AS YOU CAN – REPLACE YOUR AUTOMATIC PATTERN RESPONSE WITH ‘DEAD AIR’, so ‘BE STILL, and KNOW THAT YOU ARE THE GOD OF YOU, THE BOSS OF YOU’, then JUST SMILE WITH YOUR HEART at poor little NAUGTHY YOU THE CHILD, until the urge goes away.
IF YOU LIKE, SAY TO YOURSELF, LEARN AS A MANTRA AND THEN ‘SPELL IT OUT’ SLOWLY WHENEVER YOU FEEL URGENTLY COMPELLED, EITHER EXTERNALLY OR INTERNALLY, AS FOR A CHILD INTERNAL AND EXTERNAL IS LARGELY THE SAME THING – ‘UNCONSCIOUS YOU’, THE CLEVER, TWATTY LITTLE KID USES ‘PROJECTION’ AGAINST YOU, YOU SIMPLY SEE YOU MINDSTATE WHEREVER YOU LOOK IN THE WORLD –
‘YOU ARE NOT THE BOSS OF ME…
I AM WHO I CHOOSE TO BE…’
THEN DECIDE WHAT IS BEST FOR FUTURE, ‘CONSCIOUS YOU’, RATHER THAN YOUR NORMAL PATTERN REACTION – LET IT ‘FADE OUT’ AS IT IS YOU THE CHILD CHASING ‘YOUR DEATH’, CONSCIOUS YOU WANTS MORE THAN THAT TRASHY, STEREOTYPICAL EXISTENCE.
BE CLEAR – CONSCIOUS YOU DECIDES WHAT TO DO OUT OF THE DESIRE TO COMFORT ITSELF WITH STRENGTH-IN-THE-FUTURE, TWAT YOU THE CHILD DECIDES WHAT TO DO OUT OF THE DESIRE TO COMFORT ITSELF WITH WEAKNESS-IN-THE-NOW.
HOWEVER TRITE THIS SOUNDS REMEMBER YOU ARE TALKING TO YOU THE CHILD, YOUR UNCONSCIOUS MINDSTAE IS A BIG KID, SO KEEP IT SIMPLE.
It maybe useful to know that this is how gangsters teach their kids to not give the smallest fuck what your society or anyone else thinks of them, and IT VERY EFFECTIVE. See it is only your opinion of you that matters, as long as you REMEMBER TO ACTUALLY HAVE AN OPINION ABOUT YOU, IN THE 3RD PERSON, INSTEAD OF CONTINUING TO BLANK YOUR CONSCIOUS MIND TO DE-VALUE YOUR ‘SHAME’ AND ‘FORGET’. IN REALITY, NATURALLY, YOUR LEVEL OF CONSCIOUSNESS LITERALLY COMES FROM YOUR LEVEL ON ‘CONSCIENCE’, WHICH IS YET ANOTHER TEST YOU DID NOT EVEN KNOW EXISTED, UNTIL NOW…
I KNOW MANY OF YOU MAY SPEND YOUR TIME IN BUSY ENVIROMENTS WHERE YOU HAVE TO ‘REACT VIA SPEECH’ ALL THE TIME, WHICH ALLOWS YOU THE KID TO TAKE YOU OVER VERY EASILY, SO LEARN TO USE THIS TO YOUR ADVANTAGE, LIKE IN TRUTH YOU SHOULD LEARN TO USE ALL YOUR PROBLEMS AS SPURS TO PRACTICE. SIMPLY KEEP PART OF YOUR AWARENESS SEPARATE AND ‘LISTEN TO YOUR SPEECH’, LITERALLY AS YOU TALK, WITH A VIEW TO CRITIZING HOW GOOD, HOW USEFUL, HOW CLASSY, HOW LYRICAL, HOW LOW, SLOW AND SEXY IT IS, WHILST MAKING IT AS ELEGANT, ENGAGING, FUNNY, CHARMING AS YOU CAN. REMOVE ALL THOSE ERRS AND UMMS, ANY STEREOTYPICAL TICKS YOU PICKED UP AS A KID – NO ONE LIKES AN ADULT WHO TALKS LIKED A SCARED LITTLE KID, IT IS A KEY GIVE AWAY…
See, YOU MUST UNDERSTAND THE DUAL NATURE OF ‘HAVING BOTTLE’ as a CONCEPT RIGHT AT THE START OF THIS POST, as to conceptualize this understanding WILL HELP YOU DO THE 2 THINGS YOU NEED TO DO – MAKE YOU WANT TO ‘CHOOSE’ A DIFFERENT MINDSET GOAL OF STRENGTH and ALLOW YOU TO ‘DESTROY’ YOUR OLD ONE OF COMFORT. As a BIG KID all your pattern development since childhood is based on ONE SINGLE GOAL, ONE DRIVING FORCE = EVER INCREASING LEVELS OF ‘EGO SAFTEY’ BECAUSE IT IS THE NUMBER ONE FORM OF COMFORT – TO FEEL SECRETLY CLEVER, NO MATTER HOW FAKE, HOW DELUSIONAL EVEN YOU KNOW THAT FEELING IS, YET YOU STILL CRAVE IT, WHICH IS THE ACTUAL ROOT OF ALL YOUR SELF TAUGHT DELUSIONS, THE BIZARRE, UNREAL FANTASY LIFE YOU EMBRACE SIMPLY TO FEEL A BIT BETTER, FOR A MOMENT.
So all of your FALSE INSTINCTS are based on THE FEAR/DESIRE/BOREDOM MODEL, anything outside of that is PRESENTED TO YOUR MIND AS MADDNESS, AS SCARY, AS AGAINST YOUR NATURE, AS INAUTHENTIC, AS NOT COOL, AS BORING, BECAUSE IT IS ‘NOT SAFE’ FOR ‘YOU THE CHILD’, even though it is exactly what YOU THE GIFTED ADULT NEEDS TO DO, RIGHT FUCKING NOW, as that is how YOU KILL THAT AWFUL, CRAVEN, COWARDLY FAKE BITCH, ‘YOU THE CHILD’. Then all you Fake Shit evaporates, as its a CON JOB THAT HAS TO BE CONTINUALLY ‘MADE UP’ IN THE BACK OF YOUR MIND BY THE UNCONSCIOUS, CHILDISH PATTERNS THAT CONTROL YOU – ITS SIGNATURE IS ‘VISCERAL DOUBT’.
This way YOU STOP MAKING THE CLASSIC MISTAKE OF ALL UNSCHOOLED HIGHLY GIFTED FOLKS – STOP SEEING YOUR INCREASING NEED TO RUN TOWARD INCREASINGLY DANGEROUS AND SELF DESTRUCTIVE VERSIONS OF YOUR ‘FAKE DESIRES’, as BADASS, as BRAVE, as some sort of ANTI-HEROIC COOL. Its not, YOU ARE A GUTLESS FUCK UP, AND IF YOU GO ON BEING A GUTLESS FUCK-UP, A CHILDISH ADULT, you may very well turn into the kind of SELF DESTRUCTIVE EVIL TWAT OF A NARCISSIST that is becoming increasingly common in this world, and I’m not joking – I almost did many years ago, and I know several who actually have done. Be clear – the answer to the increasingly pathetic ‘Choo Choo Train, a chuffing down the track to Banal Humiliation’ your riding on is BOTTLE.
The concept of it is easy really:
BY DEVELOPING AN ATTITUDE OF ‘STRENGTH IN ALL THINGS’ YOU PROGRESSIVELY WEAKEN YOUR ‘WEAKNESSES HOLD’ OVER YOU.
YOU ARE ACTUALLY WEAKENING ‘YOU THE CHILD = WEAKNESS ITSELF’, SO ONE DAY YOU CAN KILL IT, ONCE AND FOR ALL, BUT YOU CAN’T AT THE START.
SEE BOTTLE IS THE ALKALINE TO THE ACID OF WEAKNESS, SO MUST DILUTE THAT WEAKNESS BEFORE YOU REPLACE IT ALTOGETHER – YOU MUST FORCE YOUR STRENGTH, LITTLE BY LITTLE WHILST STILL FEELING WEAK OVERALL, SO YOU CAN BE STRONG ALL THE TIME LATER.
THAT IS WHY YOU MUST START TO FOCUS ON BEING STRONG AGAINST WEAKNESS IN SMALL, PREPLANNED, MOMENTARY THINGS, WHEN YOU CAN MUSTER A SHORT ENERGY PEAK TO ACTUALLY ‘TRY’ AND ‘DO’, or ‘NOT REACT’, AS THAT IS HOW DILUTING THE ‘POWER OF YOUR WEAKNESS’ WORKS.
THIS IS WHY DOING IT A LOT REALLY, REALLY MATTERS – AS YOU MUST STRING YOUR WINS TOGETHER IN ORDER TO LADDER UP, OTHERWISE YOU ACTUALLY LOSE THE BENEFIT OF THAT WIN, AND YOU FALL BACK DOWN AGAIN – YOUR NEW STRENGTH EVAPORATES UNLESS REGULARLY FED.
I know its NOT SUBTLE but as a BIG KID any SUBTLY IS GOING TO BE WASTED ON YOU, you are stuck with the emotional level of A BRAT, IE THE EMOTIONAL MATURITY OF A ‘CLEVER DORK’, the obvious, banal need for ‘clever wins in the playground’, so the concept of WABI-SABI, of ‘IMPERFECT BEAUTY’ EVOKING A DEEP SENSE OF SPIRITUAL LONGING, is so far above your dumb ass it pointless even mentioning it – YOU THINK LIKE A CHILD, EFFECTED BY EVERYTHING ALL THE TIME, SO FRAGILE THAT YOU ARE OVERWHELMED BY THE NEED TO REACT TO ‘THE NOW’ OF ALL YOUR FALSE, TRIVIAL, UNRELIABLE, LEARNT INSTINCTS. See, you ‘the child’ LOVES THAT – IT ONLY EXISTS, AT ALL, ‘IN’ THOSE REACTIONS, WITHOUT THE CHILDISH SLAVERY TO THOSE REACTIONS ‘YOU THE CHILD’ SIMPLY ‘DISAPPEARS’, as it does not really exist in your LAW, your SPIRIT, ITS ALL FAKE, just like you..
Of course, the trick to an effective critique of yourself is to UNDERSTAND YOUR FAULTS, way better than you do now, MAINLY BY REALIZING YOU HAVE SOME BIG ONES – RECOGNIZE IN YOURSELF THAT YOU HAVE SELF-DESTRUCTIVE FAULTS YOU WISH TO FIX BECAUSE YOU ARE EMBARRISSED BY THEM:
See you must FIRST UNDERSTAND ‘THE’ CHILDISH TRAP – you’re just a DORK, NONE OF WHAT YOU THINK IS HAPPENING IS HAPPENING.
So NONE OF YOUR JUSTIFICATIONS for what YOU HAVE BECOME ARE TRUE, EVEN ‘REAL’, your LIFE IS A LAYERED SET OF ANTI-HEROIC ILLUSIONS…
SEE YOUR SECRET ‘CLEVERNESS’ IS A FORM OF DESPERATION, WEAKNESS, SICKNESS, BUT IN REALITY YOU ARE REALLY NOT CLEVER, ARE YOU..
TO BE A CHILD IS TO CHOOSE COMFORT OVER CHALLENGE BECAUSE YOU ARE WEAK – A GUTLESS LOSER WHO CAN NEVER FACE DESTINY OR ‘PURPOSE’.
SEE TO BE A CHILD IS TO BE STUCK IN A CYCLE OF ‘DESPERATION vs COMFORT’ THAT NEVER ENDS, A ‘PERFECT TRAP’ YOU CAN NEVER GET OUT OF BY YOURSELF, AS YOU CAN ONLY THINK WHAT YOU HAVE THOUGHT BEFORE, IN THE SAME SEQ YOU THOUGHT IT BEFORE = WEAKNESS TRAP!
SO ITS SIMPLE REALLY – TO GROW UP YOU NEED TO THINK NEW THOUGHTS YOU HAVE NOT THOUGHT BEFORE AND SO ACTUALLY START TO THINK PRODUCTIVELY, TO YOUR BENEFIT, SIMPLY BECAUSE THEY ARE NEW, THEY ARE FRESH, THERE IS NO PATTERN IN THEM, YET.
GET IT – IF THERE IS NO AUTOMATIC PATTERN TO YOUR THOUGHTS YOU ACTUALLY HAVE TO THINK PROPERLY, THAT IS WHY YOU HATE DOING IT.
So lets see if you have the stones to grow, the fight to change, the ENERGY LEFT TO EVEN ‘WANT TO BE BETTER THAN NOTHING’ EH, SO BEST UNDERSTAND YOUR PROBLEM RIGHT-FUCKING-NOW, VERY SIMPLY PUT – what will happen if you don’t grow up:
YOUR STRENGTH, YOUR ‘POWER IN THE MOMENT’ THAT IS YOUR ‘USEABLE ENERGY LEVEL’ WILL CONTINUE TO DECLINE AND MAKE YOU PROGRESSIVELY LOW, LOST, SCARED, CONFUSED, INCAPACITATED AND STUPID BECAUSE OF THIS ONE FAILURE – ALL CHILDREN INDULGE IN SELF-SABOTAGE FOR FUN, BUT IT IS NOT FUN, IT IS ‘COMFORT’, IT IS THE COWARDLY NEED TO COMFORT YOURSELF FOR BEING A CRAVEN, TWATTY LITTLE KID ‘AT HEART’, AS YOU HAVE ‘NO BOTTLE’ TO FACE CHALLENGE, CHANGE, ADVENTURE ANYMORE.
SO YOU ‘HUMILIATE’ YOURSELF WHILE DELUDING YOURSELF THAT IT’S COOL TO BE ‘NOTHING’ BECAUSE YOU HAVE TO MAKE YOUR LIFE ‘BEARABLE’ IN THE NOW SOMEHOW, OTHERWISE YOUR ‘ACTUAL REALITY’ WOULD CRUSH YOU – THE SHOCK OF YOUR ‘REAL’, OF WHAT YOU ACTUALLY DO, WHAT YOU THINK, WHAT YOU CRAVE ALL THE TIME WOULD BLOW YOUR LITTLE MIND APART, THAT IS WHY YOU CAN NEVER WILLINGLY ‘FACE IT’, THAT IS WHY BEING A CHILD IS A ‘TRAP’ – YOU COMFORT YOUR DESPERATION IN CHILDISH WAYS THAT MAKE YOU EVEN MORE DESPERATE = YOUR WHOLE LIFE…
YEP – AS A BIG KID WHAT I HAVE JUST WRITTEN ABOVE DEFINES YOU WHOLE MISERABLE LITTLE EXISTENCE, yet YOU DON’T SEE THAT, DO YOU, YOU ARE STUCK ‘LIVING IT’, so you can’t see SHIT PASSED THE REACTIVE PATTERNS YOU PROJECT ONTO EVERYTHING AND EVERYBODY, without a fucking SCOOBIE-DO WHAT ‘THAT IS’, OR WHO ‘THEY ARE’, in REALITY – AS A CHILD YOU PIGEON HOLE EVERYTHING AS ITS VAGUELY LIKE SOMETHING THAT HAS ALREADY HAPPENED TO YOU, SO YOU THINK YOU KNOW WHAT IT MEANS TO YOU = YOUR CRAPPY LITTLE INCORRECT ‘TRUTH’ = DELUSION.
A CHILD IS DECEIVED BY EVERYTHING BECAUSE THEY HAVE ‘NO SENSE OF SELF’.
YES, to GROW UP you must REPLACE THIS DELUDED, MOMENTARY REALITY, the REALITY YOU ‘LIVE IN’ BY FIRST RELATING TO IT, AND THEN REPLACE IT WITH A PERMANENT ‘SENSE OF SELF’ THAT HAS NO NEED TO REACT, otherwise you will always be A SILLY, HARMLESS LITTLE TWAT, forever ‘wanking off’ OVER SOME CLEVER FANTASY LIFE YOU NEED TO BELIEVE IS REAL, stuck in the ‘secret cleverness’ of your (NOT SO) SECRET WORLD, with your ALL IMAGINARY FREINDS, FLUFFY TOYS, AND TAME, MIDDLE-CLASS OBSESSIONS…
AN ADULT IS NOT DECEIVED BY EVERYTHING BECAUSE THEY HAVE THE BOTTLE TO FACE REALITY.
THE CONSTANT EMOTIONAL FEELING OF A DOMINATE ‘SENSE OF SELF’ IS WHAT OPPOSES YOUR PETTY ‘REACTIONS OF THE MOMENT’, IT IS A FELT WEIGHT OF ‘SERVICE’ IN YOURSELF, TOWARD YOURSELF, IT IS AN ATTITUDE TO LIFE FROM WHICH EVERYTHING IS JUDGED, AS USEFUL OR USELESS. IT IS MADE OUT OF ‘THE SUPERIOR FEELING’ OF YOUR ‘BOTTLE’, BUILT AGAINST ‘THE INFERIOR FEELING’ OF PETTY, SHORT-LIVED ‘EMOTIONAL PANGS’, WHICH ONLY EXIST, RECUR AND GROW BECAUSE YOU SERVICE THEM, INDULGE THEM, LIKE A CRACKHEAD.
IT IS A QUESTION OF ‘FEELING’ THE ‘OVERALL’ VALUE OF THINGS IN THE MOMENT ‘CORRECTLY’, BECAUSE YOU CAN SEE WHAT THAT MEANS OUTSIDE OF THAT MOMENT, AS YOU REMEMBER ‘YOUR SENSE OF SELF’ WHICH EXISTS OUTSIDE OF THE NEEDS OF THE MOMENT, SEPARATE TO THEM, BIGGER THAN THEM, MORE POWERFUL THAN THOSE NEEDS, SO THOSE LEARNT, FAKE, CHILDISH NEEDS OF THE MOMENT CAN BE CRUSHED IT BY IT.
BUT IT IS IMPORTANT TO UNDERSTAND YOU ARE ‘NOT CHOOSING’ TO ‘NOT FOLLOW’ YOUR CHILDISH REACTIONS OUT OF FEAR OR REPRESSION, LIKE A GANGSTA WHO DOES NOT KILL A HATED RIVAL BECAUSE OF THE FACT IT WILL SWIFTLY LEAD TO THEIR OWN DEMISE, OR A PARTY GIRL WHO REFUSES THE NEXT VODKA SHOT BY IMAGINING THE HUMILIATION OF PAIN AND VOMIT IT WILL CAUSE, AS THEY WILL ONLY MAKE YOU EVEN MORE ‘WORSE THAN’.
YOU MUST STILL FEEL IT, ACCEPT IT, UNDERSTAND THOSE UNCONSCIOUS PANGS AND SIMPLY CHOOSE NOT TO FOLLOW THEM ‘IN THE MOMENT OF WANTING TO DO IT’, BECAUSE THERE IS SOMETHING BETTER THAN YOU WANT MORE ‘CONSCIOUSLY’, EVEN IF THAT IS JUST TO DEVELOP ‘THE POWER TO CHOOSE’ WHO YOU ACTUALLY ARE VIA FIRST CONTROLLING TRIVIAL THINGS, TO PRACTISE SELF CONSCIOUSNESS IN LOW LEVEL EMOTIONAL WIEGHTED THINGS SO IT IS WAY EASIER = SELF RESPECT.
THEN THOSE PANGS WILL START TO DIE AWAY, TO DISAPPEAR LIKE A FORGOTTEN FANTASY, AND YOU WILL SEE THAT 90% OF WHO YOU ARE AS ‘HOW YOU ACT’ VIA WHAT YOU ‘WANT TO DO’ IN THE MOMENT DOES NOT EXACTLY EXIST ‘AS YOU’ AT ALL – IT IS NOT CONSCIOUS YOU, ITS LITTLE MORE THAN SELF DRIVING CAR, SO IT IS JUST A SET OF HABITUAL, BITSY, CLUMSY, STEREOTYPICAL REACTIONS, PATTERN ‘SAYINGS’ YOU LEARNT IN CHILDHOOD THAT DON’T EVEN WORK TOGETHER, THAT YOU ARE NO LONGER CONSCIOUS OF DOING, AND HAVE LONG SINCE FORGOTTEN THE REASON FOR = DUMB.
SEE IT NOW AS BEST YOU CAN – YOUR CONSCIOUS ‘SELF’ IS A FALSE IMPRESSION CREATED BY AUTOMATED RESPONSES, BUT YOU ARE NOT THINKING SELF CONSCIOUSLY, THE LITTLE SELF CONSCIOUSNESS YOU HAVE IS EMPLOYED IN WATCHING YOUR REACTIONS, YOU DON’T USE IT TO THINK, AT ALL…
THIS REQUIRES PRACTISE AND SOME CLEVER TRICKS IN LATER LIFE, SO YOU MUST START TO ‘CONNECT YOUR MOMENTS TOGETHER’, PAST/PRESENT/FUTURE BY FEELING YOUR SENSE OF SELF IN THESE 3 TIMESCALES AT THE SAMETIME, USING YOUR EXPANDED AWARENESS OF YOUR SPIRIT AS A FEELING, AS YOUR ‘1 JOB’. USE YOUR OVER THINKING TO FEEL (NOT THINK) AND CONSTANTLY REMIND YOURSELF TO EVOKE THE FEELING OF YOUR BOTTLE THAT EXISTS OUTSIDE OF YOUR REACTIONS TO THE MOMENT SO IT IS ‘FIXED’, SOLID, THERE ALL THE TIME AS YOUR ANCHOR, SO YOUR MOMENTS SPREAD OUT, YOUR EXPERIENCE OF YOUR SENSE OF SELF BECOMING MUCH LONGER IN TIME, MORE FIXED, STABLE – YOU ARE NOT JUST THIS MOMENT, YOU ARE YESTERDAY/TODAY/TOMORROW ALL AT THE SAME MOTHERFUCKING TIME.
THE EASIEST WAY TO DO THIS IS SIMPLY REMEMBER THE POINT, THE GOAL, THE PURPOSE OF WHAT YOU ARE ‘AIMING FOR’ IN THE BACK OF YOUR MIND ALL THE MOTHERFUCKING TIME, PUT ENOUGH EMOTIONAL WEIGHT INTO THAT PURPOSE SO IT CAN STAND AGAINST THE EMOTIONAL WEIGHT OF YOUR TRIVIAL, SELF DESTRUCTIVE PANGS.
AGAIN – IF YOU DON’T HAVE A GREATER PURPOSE, AN OVERARCHING AIM THEN YOU HAVE THE PURPOSE OF ‘NO PURPOSE’, WHICH IS TO CHASE COMFORT, DISTRACTING NAUGTHINESS, THEN LATER OBLIVION, ACTUAL SELF SABOTAGE, BANAL SELF DESTRUCTION – without this solid sense of purpose you are simply a trivial little bitch stringing together as many COMFORTS as you can all day every day, which is what we mean when we say you JUST EXIST, RATHER THAN ‘LIVE’.
LEARN TO DO THIS AND YOU WILL GROW UP WHETHER YOU WANT TO OR NOT, AS ALL YOUR THOUGHTS, WHICH PROCEED FROM YOUR PETTY FEELINGS AT AN ANIMAL LEVEL OF CONSCIOUSNESS, WILL CHANGE, AND YOU WILL START TO SEE WHAT IS HAPPENING ‘OVER TIME’, RATHER THAN JUST IN THIS MOMENT, AND YOU WILL FIND YOU ACTUALLY HAVE THE CLASS, STYLE AND PRESENCE YOU ALREADY CRAVE SO MUCH – THE DELUSIONS OF YOUR TACKY LITTLE SHIT BEING COOL WILL EVAPORATE…
SADLY, HOWEVER EASY I MAKE THIS FOR YOU, YOU WILL STILL NEED ‘THE ENERGY LEVELS OF A CHILD’ TO DO IT, AS A GIFTED CHILD CAN NEVER USE WHAT THEY HAVE UP IN ANY GIVEN DAY, BUT ONCE YOUR AGE STARTS WITH A 3 AS A HEDONIST YOU WILL HAVE LIKLEY USED NOT ONLY WHAT YOU HAVE, BUT AFTER A PARTICUARLY BAD W/E EVERYTHING YOU WOULD OF HAD FOR A YEAR OR MORE = KARMIC ENERGY DEBT = FORMS OF DEPRESSION.
SO WE MUST GET YOUR ENERGY TO ‘LEAD’ RATHER THAN JUST ‘FOLLOW’ YOUR REACTIONS LIKE YOU DO NOW, AND YOU MUST FIND THAT ENERGY IN YOUR ‘LAW OF THE JUNGLE’, YOUR BETTER THAN, WHICH IS YOUR ‘ELITISM’, THE EASIEST ACCESS YOU HAVE TO YOUR SPIRITUAL POWER AT AN ANIMAL LEVEL – YOU MUST UNDERSTAND YOU ARE NOT ‘THEM’, YOU ARE ‘US’, AND START TO TREAT THEM AS WHAT THEY ARE – ANIMALS THAT ARE BENEATH YOU.
BUT I’M NOT HERE TO MAKE YOU ‘FEEL A BIT BETTER’, EVEN MAKE YOU A BETTER HEDONIST, MUCH AS BOTH THOSE THINGS WILL HAPPEN, I’M HERE TO CHANGE YOU, OTHERWISE YOU WILL END UP USING SOME LIMITED, ALMOST ACCIDENTAL EXPERIENCE OF SPIRITUALITY TO DESTROY YOURSELF, LIKE SOME OF YOU ARE NOW, AND TRUST ME, THAT IS NO FUN AT ALL – THE HIGHLY GIFTED MUST ‘GROW’ OR BURN OUT.
ITS TIME TO GET A BIT (WELL ‘A LOT’) ‘MEANER’ WITH YOURSELF IN THE 3RD PERSON, NOT THE 1ST PERSON, SO YOU GET MEAN WITH UNCONSCIOUS ‘YOU THE CHILD’, YOU ‘DON’T HATE CONSCIOUS YOU AS ALL OF YOU’, ‘CAUSE ITS NOT, ITS OTHER.
SO USE WHATEVER YOU HAVE LEFT NOW TO BUILD MORE ENERGY YOU NEED TO GROW UP, INSTEAD OF PISS IT AWAY AGAIN FOR THE MOMENTARY PLEASURE OF FEELING IT GO LIKE A BASIC BITCH,
OTHERWISE YOU HAVE NOT GOT A FUCKING PRAYER OF EVEN PAYING OFF WHAT YOU ALREADY OWE, LET ALONE WHAT YOU NEED = ADHD, EARLY MADNESS AND PAINFUL DEATH.
IF ALL THAT SOUNDS A BIT RIGHT-WING FOR WOKE LITTLE YOU, KNOW THAT IS BECAUSE IT IS, WHILST ALSO SEEING ‘THE TRUTH’, THAT EVERY CLASS SYSTEM THAT HAS EVER BEEN ON THIS PLANET IS TRYING TO TELL YOU = THE PRICE OF THE FEELING OF ELITISM IS TO ‘BE OF SERVICE’, VOLUNTARILY TO THOSE LESS THAN, FOR NO REASON OR EXPECTATION OF BENEFIT.
INDEED WHEN YOU START TO FEEL SPIRITUALLY ELITIST YOU WILL BE COMPELLED EMOTIONALLY TO BE OF SERVICE BECAUSE EXERCISING THE POWER OF YOUR ELITISM FEELS BETTER THAN ANYTHING ELSE, PARTICULARLY TO YOUR OWN KIND, RATHER THAN CONTINUE TO INDULGE ‘THE SLAVERY’ OF YOUR CURRENT EXISTENCE – YOU WILL FEEL YOUR POWER GROW VIA USING IT TO HELP OTHERS WORTHY OF THAT HELP, YOUR POWER TO CHOOSE.
BUT FOR NOW THAT IS ‘OUT OF REACH’ – FOR NOW YOU MUST FOCUS ON REMEMBERING WHAT IT FEELS LIKE TO BE ENTHUSIASTIC, TO HAVE A ‘LUST FOR LIFE’, TO HAVE THE ENERGY LEVELS OF A KID, AND ESCAPE ‘THE FEAR’, THE AWFUL DRUDGERY OF THE FEAR/DESIRE/BOREDOM CYCLE WHERE ALL YOU CAN DO IS REACT LIKE ONE OF PAVLOVS DOGS – YOU ARE GOING TO NEED THAT ENERGY TO DO THIS, OTHERWISE NOTHING WILL HAPPEN..
ITS WORTH REMEMBERING THIS – TO DO ANYTHING SPIRITUALLY AT A MEANINGFUL LEVEL OF EFFORT WHILST STILL BEING STUCK AS AN ANIMAL (SO IT WORKS) YOU MUST BE IN A STATE OF CONTROLLED, HIGH EMOTION, OTHERWISE YOU ARE SIMPLY GOING THROUGH THE MOTIONS OF ANOTHER PATTERN REACTION, LOST IN YET ANOTHER DAZE SENT BY YOUR ‘CONFUSED SENSE OF SELF’ = A CHILD.
YES – TO ‘CHANGE’ IS TO ‘GROW’, OTHERWISE EVERYTHING YOU ARE MOMENT TO MOMENT IS ‘TRIVIAL’, YET YOU TREAT IT LIKE ITS IMPORTANT. READ THAT AGAIN, THEN READ IT AGAIN – LOOK AT WHAT YOU OVER REACT TO EVERY DAY AND ‘KNOW’ THIS MAKES YOU ‘TRIVIAL’, SO YOU ARE ‘HARMLESS’.
BUT WHEN YOU HAVE ‘BOTTLE’, YOU WILL START TO SEE THE OBVIOUSNESS OF ALL THE LITTLE CONS AND CLEVERNESS USED TO CONTROL YOU IN THE ‘PETTY’ MOMENT, AGAINST THE TIME AND SCALE OF ‘THE YOU’ THAT EXISTS OUTSIDE OF THAT MOMENT – THAT LOOKS DOWN ON THAT MOMENT AS ‘NOTHING’. SEE YOU THE ADULT NOW HAS ‘THE BOTTLE’, ‘THE HEART’ TO SEE THOSE TRIVIAL EMOTIONS AS ‘NOT YOU’ AND THEREFORE ‘NOT WANTED’, WHEN THEY HAPPEN, AND SO FIND IT QUITE EASY NOT TO REACT TO THEM LIKE A SILLY, FECKLESS, UGLY, STUPID, TEDIOUS LITTLE STREET URCHIN…
SO HERE IS A NEW PATTERN FOR YOU, ONE YOU NEED TO PRACTICE SO YOU LEARN IT, FAST…
TRY AND TAKE A SECOND NOW TO UNDERSTAND WHAT GROWING UP, WHAT ‘RECREATING YOURSELF’ MEANS PRACTICALLY AND START TO PREPARE THIS PROCESS IN ADVANCE OF NEEDING IT IN THE MOMENT, BECAUSE IN THE MOMENT YOU CANNOT ‘THINK STRAIGHT’.
TRY AND SEE THIS PROCESS AS THE ‘CONSCIOUS CHOICE’ BETWEEN ‘WHAT YOU WANT’ AND WHAT ‘YOU DON’T WANT’ IN ‘YOURSELF’ AS A PATTERN REACTION, TO QUESTION THE WISDOM, THE GOAL, THE POINT OF YOUR URGES IN TERMS OF WHAT ‘HAPPENS BECAUSE OF THEM AFTERWARDS BEING WEAKNESS’, AND SO AVOIDING THAT FAILURE IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN YOUR ‘NEED TO DO THEM’ IN THE MOMENT OF FEELING THEM…
TRY AND GET USED TO QUESTIONING THAT ‘URGE’ CONSCIOUSLY, OF NOT ACCEPTING IT AS USEFUL OR GOOD ENOUGH ANYMORE, HOWEVER UN-NATURAL THAT FEELS, TRY AND HAVE SOME DISCRIMINATION, OUTSIDE OF YOUR CHILDISH FEAR, TO ‘CONTROL YOURSELF AGAINST’, SO YOUR ‘IMAGE OF YOURSELF’ GROWS AGAINST YOUR MOOD SWINGS OF THE MOMENT – YOUR SELF IMAGE IS BUILT BY THIS ‘PROCESS OF REJECTION’.
THEN START TO MAKE THIS CHOICE, TO CONSCIOUSLY RECOGNIZE IN WHAT YOU JUST DID, IN WHAT YOU ‘FELT’ YOU WANTED TO DO IN THE MOMENT AGAINST WHAT YOU ‘BELIEVE’ YOU DON’T WANT ANYMORE, SEE WHAT YOU WOULD WISH TO CUT OUT OF YOURSELF SO YOU NO LONGER DO IT.
THEN SIMPLY WAIT FOR IT TO HAPPEN AGAIN SO YOU CAN MAKE A POINT OF OVERIDING IT, EVEN MANUFACTURE THAT FAKE FEELING IN ORDER TO OVERIDE IT IN SIMPLE, POINTLESS THINGS, SO YOU CAN GET USED TO OVERIDING THOSE FEELINGS, LITTLE BY LITTLE, AS THAT IS WHAT AN ADULT ‘IS’.
THEN USE THIS KNOWLEDGE TO ‘SEE IT COMING’, TO SENSE THE X2 ILLUSIONS THAT IT USES TO CONTROL YOU THOUGHTLESSLY – THE SHARP URGE TO ACT ‘URGENTLY/AUTOMATICALLY’ AND THE SLOW ‘GRIND OF RESISTANCE’ THAT IS BOREDOM WITH A GOAL YOU WANT –
THOSE TWATTY, CHILDISH FEELINGS DON’T EXIST IN ‘CONSCIOUS YOU’, THEY ARE SENT TO FUCK YOU BY ‘TWAT YOU THE CHILD’…
AND YES, ACCEPT YOUR FAILURE TO STOP IT FROM HAPPENING THE 1ST TIME, OR THE 10TH TIME OR THE HUNDREDTH TIME, AND SIMPLY SMILE AND TRY AGAIN, STRAIGHTAWAY IF POSSIBLE AS YOUR ‘EMOTIONS OF WILL BE UP’ THEN, BECAUSE YOU NOW REALIZE IT IS THE SIMPLE REPETITION OF MISTAKES THAT HAS FUCKED YOU UP IN THE FIRST PLACE, SO NOW YOU KNOW HOW TO FIX IT – TO TRY IN THE FACE OF FAILURE IS THE ONLY WAY TO WIN.
BE CLEAR – IT IS SIMPLY THE ABILITY TO KEEP TRYING IN THE FACE OF FAILURE THAT DEVELOPS THE UNCONSCIOUS POWER YOU NEED TO WIN ONE DAY – FAILURE IS YOUR FRIEND. BUT YOU MUST BE OPTIMISTIC IN THE FACE OF FAILURE, SO USE THE ‘ONE DAY ATTITUDE’ AND LEARN TO ENJOY IT, TO LEARN FROM EACH FAILURE AS THAT IS WHERE YOUR GIFT WILL HELP YOU ‘SEE’, ‘TO DREAM’ WHAT APPEARS TO YOU RIGHT NOW AS THE ‘IMPOSSIBLE DREAM’, BECAUSE IT IS ONLY IMPOSSIBLE AT THE MOMENT AS YOU LACK THE POWER TO ‘SEE’ HOW TO DO IT, EASILY…
YES, THE RECOGNITION OF FAILURE WITHOUT GIVING INTO IT IS A FORM OF ‘MAGIC’ IN THE GIFTED, AS LONG AS YOU DON’T STOP YOU WILL EVENTUALLY BREAK IT. YOUR CHILDS PRINCIPAL WEAPON IS TO SIMPLY WEAR YOU DOWN, SEE YOU THE CHILD AIN’T EVEN THAT BLOODY CLEVER, JUST WATCH IT SCREAM AT YOU WITH MORE OF THE SAME WHEN YOU START TO SUCCEED IN DENYING IT FOR THE FIRST TIME, HOW OBVIOUS IT BECOMES, WATCH IT KICK OFF LIKE A SPLOIT, HATEFUL LITTLE BRAT, AND LAUGH, BECAUSE YOU JUST HURT IT, AND THAT MEANS ONE DAY YOU WILL BE ABLE TO KILL IT, AND SO TAKE BACK CONTROL OF YOUR LIFE – ITS FAILURE TO STOP YOU TRYING IS THE CONTINUED GROWTH OF YOUR POWER OVER YOURSELF = MAGIC.
IN THIS WAY YOU WILL COME TO REALIZE THE STUPIDITY OF JUST ACCEPTING WHO YOU ARE NOW ‘ACCIDENTALLY’ AS SOME FINAL THING, AS INEVITABLE, AS GOOD, AS AUTHENTIC, BECAUSE THAT IS ALL TOTAL BOLLOCKS – WHO YOU ARE NOW IS JUST A TRIVIAL CHILD WHO NEVER GREW UP, SO IS STUCK WITH THE APPROXIMATE PATTERNS OF CHILDHOOD, AN UN-NATURAL CREATION OF YOUR ENVIRONMENT – YOU ARE ‘A RANDOM FREAK’ WHO BELIEVES THEY HAVE A PERSONALITY, THAT YOU ARE GOOD AND WORST OF ALL BELIEVES YOU ARE JUSTIFIED IN ALL YOUR PETTY, COMFORTING SHIT.
DECIDE, OVER TIME, TO BE WHO YOU WANT TO BE, LITTLE BY LITTLE, BECAUSE THIS IS THE ROOT, THE ANCHOR OF YOU THE ADULT, WHICH SHOULD YOU EVER HAVE THE BALLS TO DEVELOP YOURSELF WILL BECOME THE ROOT OF YOUR ELITISM, YOUR ATTITUDE OF BEING ‘BETTER THAN THIS MOMENT’, ‘YOUR SUPERIORITY TO THE MOMENT’ AGAINST ‘THE INFERIORITY TO THE MOMENT’ COMPLEX OF WHAT YOU WHERE AS A KID, WHEN YOU HAD TO DO AS YOU WERE TOLD IN ORDER TO SURVIVE, SO NOW YOU JUST ACCEPT THAT APPROACH AS ‘ALL THERE IS’ – SLAVERY TO THE PATTERNS OF CHILDHOOD, THE SENSATIONS, THE THOUGHTS AND TRANSIENT EMOTIONAL ‘MEANINGS’ YOU ‘GUESSED AT’ AS A CHILD….
SEE, IF YOU LET IT, UNCONSCIOUS ‘YOU THE CHILD’ WILL SIT AT THE BACK OF YOUR MIND, JABBING AT YOUR CONTROLS LIKE YOU ARE A PLASTIC TOY, WITH LITTLE CARE OR INTEREST OUTSIDE OF THE NEED TO RELEASE THE TENSION OF PLEASURE AGAINST DESIRE, OF COMFORT AGAINST FEAR, OF AMUSEMENT AGAINST BOREDOM. INDEED, IT CAN COME AS QUITE A SHOCK TO SEE WHAT A BANAL, TEMPORARY THING ‘YOU THE CHILD’ IS – YOU HAVE NO CHARACTER AT ALL, YOU ARE SIMPLY YOUR REACTIONS TO THE MOMENT, IN A NEVER ENDING STREAM OF REPETATIVE POINTLESS SHITE IT INVENTS IN ORDER TO LIVE ANOTHER DAY, WHEN IT SHOULD ALREADY BE LONG DEAD…
Yes, without this ‘OTHER FEELING’ YOU THE CHILD simply becomes ‘TRIVIAL’ – YOU WANT TRIVIAL THINGS, YOU FEAR TRIVIAL THINGS, YOU THINK TRIVIAL THOUGHTS, EMOTIONS, SENSATIONS, BECAUSE THAT IS ALL YOU KNOW – YOU ARE A SMALL, WEAK ‘POINTLESS LITTLE THING’ who believes living in the MOMENT means reacting to ALL YOUR MEANINGLESS MOMENTS EQUALLY, WITHOUT DISCRIMINATION OR SCALE, with no plan at all. All you ever notice is what causes a learned pattern reaction in you, EVEN THOUGH IT IS A TOTALLY MEANINGLESS, OUT OF CONTEXT REACTION BURNT INTO YOU THE CHILD, as that is ‘HOW THE MIND OF A CHILD’ WORKS – YOU’RE A ‘VICTIM’ OF ‘EXPERIENCE’…
See if you don’t grow up YOU ARE DOOMED TO SPEND YOUR WHOLE LIFE ON SOME SCALE OF NARCISSISM, as that is what a CHILD ‘IS’ – SELF-OBSESSED – as YOU HAVE NEVER made a POINT OF CHANGING THE MINDSET OF A CHILD HAVE YOU, so it is still right there, where it always was, sitting quietly in the background, long ‘forgotten’, controlling you, MAKING ‘YOU’ FORGET ‘YOURSELF’ ALL THE FUCKING TIME, whenever something ‘else’ happens.
WORSE, MUCH, MUCH WORSE is that nothing happens naturally anymore, EVERYTHING IN YOUR LIFE IS CONTROLLED BY FALSE PETTY EMOTIONS THAT YOU HAVE TO CHASE OR RUN AWAY FROM, so everything becomes DISTORTED, KINKED, FETISHZISED AS ‘NORMAL’. You pour huge amounts of time and ENERGY INTO GROWING THESE KINKS IN ‘YOU THE CHILDS’ BEHAVIOUR PATTERNS, SO THEY GET BIGGER AND YOU GET SMALLER, THIS ‘FALSE YOU’ OVERWHELMS YOU UNLESS YOUR FEAR IS STRONG ENOUGH, indeed in many unschooled gifted THESE KINKS becomes the reason they bother living, their secret FANTASY life SAVES THIER EGO FROM HAVING TO FACE THE INCOMPETENCE AND FAILURE OF THEIR ACTUAL LIFE = MIDDLE-CLASS STONER/COKE HEAD/FANTASIST…
OVERTIME THIS UN-NATURAL GROWTH ‘ON YOU’ BECOMES ALL YOU ARE, A ‘FREAK OF NATURE’, doomed to repeat itself until it is exhausted and dies, FOR NO OTHER REASON THAN IT NEVER GREW THE FUCK UP WHEN IT WAS SUPPOSED TO, so good things no longer happen to you, BECAUSE YOU RUN AWAY FROM THEM, AS YOU LUCK HAS ‘GONE BAD’. Then you start to find all idea of HELP ‘FUNNY’, all idea of DEVELOPMENT ‘FUNNY’, so all ‘BETTER THAN’ is a reason to ‘snigger’ in some dark little corner like a gutless, fake ‘sadass’, blissfully unware that YOU THE CHILD is actually laughing at ‘YOU’, as you have become its FUCK PUPPET, and IT has become AN OVER CONFIDENT MONSTER, forever goading you to GET WORSE, as that would be SOOOO COOOOOOOOOL, to see what you are dumb enough to do next, AS CONSCIOUS YOU HAS NO BLOODY IDEA WHY YOU ARE DOING IT, but still you do it anyway, LIKE A PRISON GUARD AT AUSCHWITZ…
BUT THE LIFE OF AN ADULT IS A ‘QUESTION OF SCALE’, OF DEVALUING ALL THOSE MINOR, TEMPORARY, AND FORGETTABLE PETTY RELIEFS, IN ORDER TO HAVE THE BIG, POWERFUL AND PERMANENT EXCITEMENTS OF A GROWN UP, WHO ‘KNOWS HOW TO CHANGE’, HOW TO MAKE ‘UNCONSCIOUS YOU THE CHILD’ ‘SERVE YOUR GREATER SELF’ IN THE MOMENT, AS IF THAT FUTURE YOU EXISTS NOW IN THE 3RD PERSON, AND SO CREATE ‘YOU THE ADULT’ AS ‘THE SOMETHING’ THAT CAN CHANGE.
YES – To GROW UP SPIRITUALITY IS MUCH, MUCH QUICKER IF YOU ‘IDOLIZE’ YOUR FUTURE SELF AS A ‘WORK IN PROCESS’, RATHER THAN JUST ‘HATE YOU THE CHILD’ AFTER SOME FAILURE – ITS A MUCH BETTER ‘ATTITUDE’ TOWARD FOCUSING YOUR ‘ATTENTION’, as the trivial suffering you currently associate with denying you trivial emotions IS ‘PETTY’, SO YOU WILL ‘FEEL PETTY’, AND SO THAT ‘SELF CREATED SUFFERING’ PASSES MUCH QUICKER, AND COMES BACK MUCH WEAKER NEXT TIME…
YES, EVERY CHILD IN THE WORLD SUFFERS FROM SOME DEGREE OF ‘ADHD’, of very poor ‘ATTENTION MANAGEMENT’ (the unschooled GIFTED dis-ease of choice), which gets worse and worse as the years pass, until its reflection starts to dominate your UNCONTROLLED MOOD SWINGS, because A CHILDS mind ‘wanders’ TOWARDS ‘DRAMA’ – YOU THE CHILD LOVES YOUR EXTREMES, TO THE POINT IT WILL MAKE THEM APPEAR TO HAPPEN ‘OUT OF THE BLUE’. You the child has NO CONCEPT OF GRAND STYLE OF CHARACTER, OF ‘SERVICE’, OF ‘TOMORROW’, OF ‘BETTER THAN’, SO IT SIMPLY SEEKS ‘PETTY GRATIFICATION IN THE NOW’, like a dog that HAS TO ‘BARK AT PASSING CARS’ for no reason other than it WANTS TO, so it can ‘RELEASE’ THE PETTY TENSION OF PETTY EXCITEMENT.
Yes, a CHILD SEEKS EMOTIONAL GRATIFICATION IN THE MOST BASIC SENSE, AND WILL TAKE IT ANYWHERE IT CAN GET IT, even in ‘PAIN’, JUST AS LONG AS IT FEELS ‘SOMETHING’, NOW, and YOU are not even aware of it anymore, as those trivial needs are TOTALLY UNCONSCIOUS. Indeed, they are often MANUFACTURED BY YOUR INCREASING LEVEL OF ‘OVERTHINKING’, before full-blown ‘ENERGY WEAKNESS’ TAKES HOLD LATER ON, when you start to DISAPPEAR, AS THE ENERGY TO ‘STAND AGAINST YOURSELF’ IS GONE, used up by all your pointless crap/fun/drama/pain/comforts – BY ‘NOTHINGNESS’. YOU SELL YOUR SOUL FOR NOTHING BECAUSE YOU THINK IT FEELS BETTER THAN A MOMENT AGO, BUT YET HOW DO YOU FEEL AFTERWARDS EH, AFTER THAT ‘TEMPORARY NOTHING’ THAT MADE YOU FEEL SOME ‘LITTLE SOMETHING’ FOR A SEC OR 2 IS GONE, EH..? = ITS A CON YOU MORON.
Yes, in this way YOUR LIFE JUST ‘HAPPENS TO YOU’, as you ‘SERVICE’ those unbidden excitements, fears and boredoms with your pattern reactions, SO YOU BECOME ‘LAZY’ – you not only lose any ability to ‘stand against yourself’, even the very idea of doing so sounds like MADNESS because your ‘MADNESS OF A CHILD’ HAS BECOME ‘YOUR NORMAL’ – YOU SIMPLY DON’T KNOW ANY OTHER MIND STATE EXISTS, DO YOU. Worst of all the only reason this happens is that you are CONSTANTLY OVERWHELMED BY PETTY EMOTIONS THAT CAUSE YOU TO REACT URGENTLY AS IF YOUR LIFE DEPENDED ON IT, AND DO PETTY SELF DESTRUCTIVE CRAP, over and over again BECAUSE YOU HAVE NO SENSE OF SELF, NO FELT WEIGHT OF ‘RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOUR SELF’ TO ‘OPPOSE IT’, and simply ‘laugh it off’ as that petty feeling shrivels and dies away when ‘unserviced’, LIKE GROWN UPS DO.
Yes, much as you may imbibe the large amounts of nicotine that is the only known treatment for ADHD from an early age ‘intuitively’ (the GROWN UP seekers drug of choice), you WILL STILL ACTUALLY HAVE TO GROW UP AS WELL, if you don’t want that SELF-OBSESSION TO DESTROY ALL YOUR POTENTIAL by the simple mechanism of ‘delusion’ – ALL YOUR FEELINGS = THOUGHTS = DECISIONS ARE BASED ON FALSE INSTINCTS, ACQUIRED IN CHILDHOOD, that are at best ‘APPROXIMATE’, and more usually at worst simply ‘NOT YOU’, which means ‘WRONG FOR YOU’. Often, in the UNSCHOOLED HIGHLY GIFTED, they are the EXACT OPPOSITE OF REAL YOU, as YOU THE CHILD seeks to destroy what is BEST IN YOU AS QUICKLY AND COMPLETELY AS POSSIBLE, BECAUSE THE VERY EXISTENCE OF YOUR ‘BETTER THAN’ THREATENS ‘YOU THE CHILD’ WITH DEATH, by removing its ‘FAKE AUTHENTICITY’…
Yes, to a greater or lesser degree, all day every day, YOU THINK YOU ARE THE CENTRE OF THE UNIVERSE BY BELIEVING EVERYTHING YOU FEEL IS ‘CORRECT’, REAL, so everything that you think happens is PERSONAL – THAT IT SEEMS LIKE it is ‘HAPPENING TO YOU’ BY CREATING ‘A REACTION IN YOU’ VIA FALSE INSTINCT, INSTEAD OF JUST ‘HAPPENING FOR ITSELF’, WHILE YOU JUST NOTICE IT AND MOVE ON. These reactions give everything A FALSE SENSE OF IMPORTANCE, particularly when these REACTIONS DOMINATE YOUR ‘SENSE OF YOUR SELF’, your ‘VALUE’, as they make your ‘MENTAL LIFE’ A MOMENTARY EXPERIENCE OF ONE REACTION AFTER ANOTHER, so you forget yourself, FORGET THE SENSE OF YOURSELF TO SUCH A DEGREE YOU DON’T ACTUALLY HAVE ONE, do you, BECAUSE YOU ARE STILL A CHILD – A FOOL WHO BELIEVES ‘YOU THE CHILD’ IS ‘BEST’, INSTEAD OF SEEING THE SELF SABOTAGING MADNESS IN THE SILLY LITTLE BITCH, and 2nd guessing her REACTIONS every time something YOU FEEL is ‘URGENT’…
And that’s a bad thing, a delusional thing, see the Universe does not give the smallest fuck about you – YOU ARE AN INSIGNIFICANT INSECT AMONGST MANY BILLIONS OF OTHER INSECTS LIVING OUT A VERY SHORT LIFE ON THE CRUST OF A ROCK IN A PARTICULARLY QUIET CORNER OF ‘SPACE’. But you just see the 5m2 you are standing in like its all that is important NOW, as you jump from one relative moment of ‘right now’ to the next one, before circling back to the first one again, IN A CONTINOUS SEQUENCE OF ‘STOPPED MOMENTS’, 99% OF WHICH DON’T MATTER A DAMN. BUT YOU GIVE THEM ALL THE SAME LEVEL OF ALL YOUR ‘PRECIOUS’ ATTENTION SO ‘YOU THE CHILD’ CAN ‘TRIGGER ITS REACTIONS’ TO THESE TRIVIAL MOMENTS, AS THOSE REACTIONS ARE WHAT ‘YOU THE CHILD’ IS ‘MADE OF’, as there is NOTHING ELSE SUBSTANTIAL OR PERMANENT IN ‘YOU’…
Be clear – YOU TAKE THINGS PERSONALLY BY LETTING ‘TRIVIAL EMOTIONS TRIGGER YOUR PATTERN REACTIONS’, even though you don’t want to, and often barely notice, but they still constantly weaken you via that forced reaction – these reactions force you to continually focus on one tiny thing after another, so YOUR MIND CONSTANTLY ‘STOPS’. You are a little crab in a rock pool at low tide, forced to deal with its meaningless, temporary surroundings AS IF THEY ARE GOING TO BE THERE ‘FOREVER’, and so stuck in its own little world, until the tide comes in again, that is – THE TIDE THAT IS THE ‘NESSECCARY CHANGE’ THAT SAVES IT FROM STARVATION AND INSANITY CAUSED BY ITS ‘STOPPED, CHILDISH MIND’…
But that CRAB IS NOT AS DUMB AS YOU, THAT CRAB IS A GROWN UP, so just waits for this MOMENT TO PASS, without a ‘CARE’, which – sidebar – is actually why they say ‘PATIENCE IS A VIRTUE’, yet no one knows anymore that PATIENCE MEANS STANDING AGAINST YOUR PETTY EMOTIONAL TRIGGERS BECAUSE THEY DON’T MATTER AND WILL PASS, you think patience is ‘WEAKNESS, VIA THE BOREDOM OF INACTIVITY’, ‘CAUSE YOU ARE A CHILD, and your child ‘needs’ a DISTRACTION FROM ITSELF RIGHT FUCKING NOW, otherwise its gets so very sad – ahhhh, poor little you eh, so maybe go eat a biscuit, this is a long post…
See YOU HAVE NO PERSPECTIVE, NO SENSE OF YOURSELF BASED ON YOUR ACTUAL POSITION IN REALITY, separate to the REACTIONARY RELATIVELY of your EGO, which means you can’t change, EVER, unless of course YOU ARE PREPARED TO DISASSOCIATE FROM ‘YOU THE CHILD’, FROM ITS ‘REACTIONS’ BY STANDING AGAINST THE TRIVIAL EMOTIONS THAT TRIGGER THOSE REACTIONS, ‘de-value’ what ‘it’ wants to do NOW, because you realize it is not actually YOU.
Indeed it does not even like you, ITS ‘HOST CREATURE’, its fine with you suffering as it only cares about its own EVER REVOLVING, UN-NATURAL needs and fears moment to moment – it’s A GUTLESS BITCH THAT HIDES IN THE BACKGROUND OF YOUR MIND, BEHIND YOUR UNCONSCIOUS NARCISSISM, WHICH YOU EXPERIENCE AS YOUR OVERWHELMING ‘INFERIORITY COMPLEX’ = A RECURRING TYPE OF EMOTION THAT CAUSES YOU TO DO OTHERWISE TRIVIAL, UNIMPORTANT THINGS ‘THOUGHTLESSLY’, SIMPLY BECAUSE YOU HAVE TO DO THEM ‘URGENTLY’, AND YOU WILL NEED TO SEE THIS VERY CLEARLY IN YOURSELF TO BREAK IT – TO BE GIFTED YOU CANNOT WALK AROUND FEELING INFERIOR TO EVERYTHING AND EVERYONE AS ‘YOUR CHARACTER OF NO CHARACTER’, THAT IS WHAT IT MEANS…
SEE THE SHARP PANG OF TENSION THAT ‘INFERIORITY’ CREATES CONTROLS YOU – YOUR CHILD MUST ‘COMPETE’ TO FEEL BETTER, MUST INVENT SOME ‘FAKE WIN’ IN ORDER TO EXIST, SO ANY TEMPORARY ‘PERCEIVED SUCCESS’ IS ITS MOST DANGEROUS TRAIT – YOUR WORST SELF BECOMES YOUR BEST SELF, IN YOUR CONSCIOUS EYES. SO YOU BUY INTO IT, INTO THE DELUSION OF FAILURE = SUCCESS, BECAUSE OF SOME TINY, MOMENTARY EMOTIONAL GRATIFICATION THAT COMES WITH THAT DELUSION. THIS THEN BECOMES THE BEGINNING OF THE FANTASY WORLD YOU LIVE IN, OF THE NEVER ENDING PRODUCTION OF FAKE, EMOTIONAL WINS THAT DON’T EXIST, SO ONLY YOU CAN SEE THEM, BECAUSE YOU THE CHILD NEEDS THEM TO BE HAPPY, SO YOU INDULGE IT TO COMFORT YOURSELF AGAINST ‘LIFE’…
See, as a CHILD YOU ‘HAVE TO REACT’ TO YOUR NOTHINGNESS TO SUCH AN EXTENT THAT THOSE REACTIONS ARE ALL YOU ARE, THERE IS NOTHING ELSE, NO SENSE OF YOURSELF TO STAND AGAINST IT, and go, ‘just fuck off now’, you pointless little childish reaction from when I was 6 y/os that is totally useless in this context to me, but still makes me JUMP OUT OF MY SKIN WITH THE NEED TO DO DUMB SHIT, in a simple, repetitive pattern, like a some trivial, basic bitch, doomed forever to the pointless pettiness of living out YOUR ‘authentic lies’ adopted by accident in childhood…
Easy eh..? Lol, if only… but YOU NEVER SEE ‘YOU THE CHILD’ ANYMORE DO YOU – YOU THINK YOU ARE A BIG GIRL NOW – so you think its ‘you’, don’t you, that these unbidden thoughts and feelings are natural, rationale, THAT YOU ARE BEING AUTHENTIC, THAT THIS CRAP IS ‘YOUR TRUTH’ – LMFAO…
So TODAY I’M GOING TO HELP YOU WITH THIS LITTLE SHIT SHOW OF YOURS – I’M GOING TO SHOW YOU WHAT GROWING UP IS, SPIRITUALLY, why YOU THE CHILD has to go, by creating an EMOTIONAL ANCHOR to YOU THE ADULT and INVESTING YOUR TIME AND ENERGY INTO BUILDING THAT = TO MAINTAIN THE FEELING OF ‘BOTTLE’, SO YOU HAVE ‘ENOUGH BOTTLE’ TO GO ‘AGAINST YOU THE CHILD’, in your day to day life. But you need to know what you are up against today, KNOW THAT THIS NEW ANCHOR MUST FEEL BETTER THAN THE REACTIONS OF A CHILD, which you currently chase, SO YOU CAN CHASE SOMETHING ELSE – the MINDSET OF AN ADULT, INSTEAD OF THE MINDSET OF A CHILD.
So what da fuck is the ‘MINDSET OF A CHILD’ AS AN ACTUAL PROCESS YOU CAN SEE then..? Its this…
TO BE A CHILD IS TO NEED CONSTANT ‘EXTERNAL VALIDATION’, AS THAT IS HOW ‘A CHILD LEARNS – IT ‘COPIES REALITY’.
SO TO BE A CHILD IS TO EMBRACE YOUR ‘INFERIORITY COMPLEX’ VIA THOSE E-MOTIONS, AS THEY ARE ESSENTIAL FOR LEARNING AS A KID.
SO TO BE A CHILD IS TO ‘FEEL’ EVERYTHING ‘EXTERNAL TO YOU’ PERSONALLY, TO EXPERIENCE IT ‘EMOTIONALLY’, IN AN ‘UNCONTROLLED’ WAY.
SO TO BE A CHILD IS TO FEEL RESPONSIBLE ‘TO’ EVERYTHING EXTERNALLY, WHICH OVERPOWERS ANY RESPONSIBILITY ‘FOR’ YOUR ‘SELF’ INTERNALLY.
YES – YOU ALLOW YOURSELF TO ‘BIG DOGGED’ OUT OF ANY SELF-CONTROL BY WHAT YOU THINK IS REALITY, BUT IT IS REALLY JUST YOUR TRIVAL REACTION TO A REALITY YOU HAVE ALREADY FORGOTTEN, AN HISTORIC, IMPERFECT, UNSUITABLE AND OFTEN QUITE STUPID ASSUMPTION ABOUT ‘THE MEANING OF THAT REALITY’, THAT YOU GUESSED AT AS A CHILD…
THESE PATTERNS ARE NOT REALITY, THEY ARE ‘YOU THE CHILDS’ REALITY, THEY ARE AN OUT OF DATE INSTRUCTION MANUAL WRITTEN FOR A SCARED LITTLE CHILD, A FUNCTIONAL SHORT HAND LEARNT AS A KID, SIMPLY A ‘PLACEHOLDER REACTION’ THAT YOU SHOULD OF REPLACED BY NOW…
IN THIS SENSE THE WORD ‘RESPONSIBLE’ MEANS TO BE ‘OBLIGATED’ BY YOUR ‘INFERIOR EMOTIONAL REACTIONS’ TO ‘YOUR REALITY’, SO YOU HAVE TO FOLLOW THE FIXED CHAIN OF YOUR SHITTY HISTORIC PATTERNS FORMED IN CHILDHOOD THAT ARE TRIGGERED BY THEM!
YET YOUR MOMENTARY REALITY IS A MEANINGLESS JUMBLE OF CRAP, OF ‘FALSE INSTINCT’ AS YOU HAVE NOTHING ELSE IN YOU TO ‘PUT AGAINST IT’.
SEE TO BE A CHILD IS JUST A LEARNING PHASE FOR BABY ANIMALS, WHO CAN NOT YET FEND FOR THEMSELVES, CAN NOT FIGHT, CAN NOT FIND FOOD…
AT THE END OF ITS CHILDHOOD A KID MUST GO THROUGH A RITE OF PASSAGE TO REPLACE THAT ‘INFERIOR TO REALITY’ COMPLEX WITH A ‘SUPERIOR TO REALITY’ COMPLEX – INFERIORITY MUST BECOME ‘THE FEELING OF SUPERIORITY TO YOUR REALITY’, TO BE AN ADULT.
BUT YOU DIDN’T, DID YOU – YOU ARE STUCK THERE…
Are you starting to see the problem now..? Great, as TODAY YOU MUST CHANGE AND WANT TO ‘DISOWN’ ‘YOU THE CHILD’, AS IT’S THE SOURCE OF ALL YOUR FAILURES AND FUCK UPS, as they are ALL EMBEDDED IN YOUR TOTALLY UN-NATURAL ‘MINDSET OF A CHILD’, WITH ALL THE OTHER POINTLESS REACTIONS LEARNT IN CHILDHOOD THAT YOU REALLY SHOULD OF GROWN OUT OF BY NOW, eh… But sadly, you can not fake this, SEE TO BE A GROWN UP YOU MUST NOT ONLY TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOURSELF, you MUST ‘FEEL THE WEIGHT OF THAT RESPONSIBILITY’ as more important than your REACTIONS IN THE MOMENT OF CATCHING THOSE REACTIONS – WITHOUT THAT ‘DISTRACTING’ WEIGHT YOU CAN NEVER NOTICE YOURSELF CONSISTENTLY.
Yeah, YOU KNOW ALL THIS DON’T YOU, even this spiritual version sounds very familiar TO YOU, WHICH IS WHY YOU ARE ALREADY REJECTING IT, LIKE YOU HAVE REJECTED EVERY CHANCE TO GROW UP YOU HAVE EVER HAD – YOU THINK BEING AN ADULT IS TO ‘FAKE IT’, BECAUSE YOU DON’T FEEL ANY DIFFERENT DO YOU, however older and wiser you are, as nothing in your petty little life has SHOCKED YOU OUT OF YOUR CHILDISH MIND STATE.
YOU CAN NOT PRETEND TO BE AN ADULT, SPIRITUALLY SPEAKING.
YOU MUST FEEL IT AS A SEPARATE, MORE IMPORTANT PART OF YOURSELF THAN ‘YOU THE CHILD’.
AND YOU DON’T, DO YOU – WHICH IS HOW I KNOW YOU ARE TOTALLY, OBLIVIOUSLY AND PERMANENTLY ‘FAKE’…
The KEY word above is OBLIVIOUSLY, so try and understand what it is to be UNCONSCIOUSLY FAKE – YOU LIE ALL THE TIME, NOTHING THAT COMES OUT OF YOUR MOUTH IS THE TRUTH, both CONSCIOUSLY AND EVEN ON THE RARE OCCASION YOU TRY AND BE HONEST IT IS SIMPLY ‘YOUR TRUTH’, YOUR BEST GUESS AT AN OPINION THAT YOU have SIMPLY COME TO BELIEVE IS TRUE via REPETITION, LIKE A BLOODY PARROT. So we can’t believe a fucking word you say, most of it is false instinct, just reactive gibberish, YOU DON’T EVEN REALLY WANT TO SAY IT, DO YOU, BUT YOU HAVE NOTHING ELSE TO SAY, so YOU JUST OPEN YOUR MOUTH AND WORDS COME OUT, like a monkey in the jungle following its programming. But at least theirs IS natural, WHILST YOU HAVE NO IDEA THE ENERGETIC DAMAGE AND DELUSION CAUSED BY YOUR LYING, DO YOU, you think its cool because it allows you to be secretly clever, in your own little playground, like a KID WHO RETREATS TO A FANTASY DREAM WORLD whenever something hurts its feelings – YOU ARE A TWAT.
Yes, you’re a twat, IF YOU SAW YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON WITHOUT ALL YOUR DELUSIONS then ‘YOU’ WOULD THINK YOU ARE A TWAT, A LIAR, A CHEAT, A COWARD, A FOOL, A FAILURE – A SILLY LITTLE FUCK UP WHO CAN’T THINK FAR ENOUGH AHEAD TO SEE THE SELF-DESTRUCTION IN YOUR PETTY PLEASURES. But it does not really matter that by being irresponsible with yourself you are ACTUALLY TAKING ON RESPONSIBILITY FOR EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENS TO YOU, it does not matter that you purposely make yourself smaller everyday to numb the pain of your ‘EXISTENTIAL DREAD’ AND SO ‘BE HAPPY’, it MATTERS THAT YOU HAVE NO CONSTANT SENSE OF YOURSELF AS SUPERIOR TO COMFORT YOURSELF AGAINST THE INFERIORITY COMPLEX OF A CHILD.
So you have to constantly chase ‘external comforts’ to get you through the day, just to feel slightly less POWERLESS, to try and create the ever so temporary feeling of POWER, OF CLEVERNESS IN YOURSELF – that is what a child DOES ALL DAY, that is NORMAL FOR A CHILD, so you DON’T EVEN NOTICE IT ANYMORE, YOU DON’T NOTICE THAT ONLY ‘A FORM OF PLAYING’ FEELS GOOD TO YOU, do you. SEE THE WAY YOU LIVE AS A CHILD, THAT FLAKEY, FRAGILE, TENOUS, UNSTABLE ‘EMOTIONAL EXISTENCE’ OF A CHILD IS ‘HORRIBLE’, REPULSIVE, OBVIOUS – ONLY A COMPLETE FOOL WOULD CHOOSE TO BE IT, once you know what the alternative is, of course…
So you wanna stop being a pointless fuck up and GROW UP yet, NOW YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT A CHILD IS? Cool, SO LETS SHOW YOU HOW TO BE MORE THAN A BASIC LITTLE ‘1 DIMENSIONAL’ TOOL then, shall we, BUT FIRST, a little HEADS UP FOR YA – YOU HAVE A PROBLEM:
YOU HAVE NORMALISED BEING A CHILD AS A GOOD THING, MADE A FAKE STRENGTH OUT OF A REAL WEAKNESS.
THEREFORE YOU DON’T WANT TO CHANGE, AS YOU DON’T WANT TO SEE THESE COLOSSAL MISTAKES YOU HAVE MADE AS A KID.
WORSE EVERYTHING THAT MAKES YOUR LIFE BEARABLE, FUN, COMFORTABLE IS ASSOCIATED WITH BEING CHILDISH, THOUGHLESS.
THEREFORE TO DE-VALUE YOU THE CHILD IS VERY DIFFICULT FOR YOU, AND TYPICALLY HAS TO BE ‘SLAPPED OUT OF YOU’, THE HARD WAY.
THIS IS SUCH AN ISSUE IN DEVELOPMENT THAT MOST TEACHERS SIMPLY WON’T DO IT, IT’S UNBELIEVABLY TEDIOUS AND ANNOYING, LIKE YOU.
SO THE FEW LIKE ME, WHO ARE WILLING TO TRY, TEND TO BE A LITTLE RIGHT-WING ABOUT IT – THIS POST HAS TO HIT VERY HARD FOR IT TO WORK, HAS TO BE VERY REPETATIVE AND CUT DEEPLY TO GET PAST THE EGO DEFENSES OF A CHILD, AND FORCED REPETITION IS ALL YOU HAVE AS A CHILD….
SO KNOW THE REWARD FOR PASSING THIS TEST IS VERY, VERY HIGH – TO GET ‘CONTROL’ OF YOUR LIFE BACK AND ACTUALLY BE SOMEBODY ‘BETTER THAN’ YOU THE BIG KID, WHO FUCKS UP CONSTANTLY FOR NO REASON…
SEE TO GROW UP IN LATER LIFE ‘YOU MUST WANT TO GROW UP’, MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE – YOU MUST BE ENERGIZED BY THE THOUGHT OF IT, AS YOU KNOW WHAT IT MEANS FOR YOU, NOW YOU HAVE UNDERSTOOD THIS POST AND HENCE UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU THE ADULT IS, INSTEAD.
See this stuff has to STING A BIT, but it will only work if YOU RECOGNISE ‘WHAT IT IS STINGING’ IS ‘YOU THE CHILDISH FUCK UP’, then you can come to KNOW that BIG KID BY WHAT IT WANTS, what it does to you day to day AND therefore DE-VALUE THAT FUCK UP, see it as the horrible fucking mess that wants to make your life a self-destructive shit box, FULL OF PARASITIC ANIMAL TRASH, forever – YOU MUST ‘SEE’ THE UNCONSCIOUS PART OF YOU THAT IS MAKING YOUR LIFE SHIT IN ORDER TO DRIVE YOU TO COMFORT YOURSELF LIKE A CHILD BECAUSE OF THAT SHITNESS, WHILST THOSE ‘PETTY COMFORTS OF INFERIORITY’ SIMPLY CREATE EVEN MORE SHIT, AND SO THE CYCLE NEVER ENDS. See YOU THE CHILD knows your PLEASURES WOULD NOT BE FUN if they did not COMFORT YOU AGAINST THE REST OF YOUR CRAPPY LITTLE LIFE, that is why you have a crappy little life…
I KNOW ITS HARD TO BELIEVE BUT ITS TRUE – YOU THE CHILD FUCKS UP ON PURPOSE so YOU GIVE IT ‘ATTENTION’, ALL DAY AND EVERY DAY, TO A GREATER OR LESSER DEGREE. YOU MUST GET THIS IN YOUR HEAD, NOW – THIS IS WHAT WE MEAN WHEN WE SAY ‘SELF-SABOTAGE’, THE MOST DANGEROUS OF ALL THE FAULTS OF A CHILD = EVER INCREASING FAILURE = EVENTUAL SELF-DESTRUCTION. Yep, all that ‘ATTENTION SEEKING WHORE’ thing has to go, ONCE YOU HAVE GROWN UP YOU WILL HATE THAT PART OF YOURSELF MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE – YOU WILL HATE THE COWARDICE THAT ONCE DOMINATED YOUR LIFE, you will hate what it DID TO YOUR ‘NAME’…
You must see the CON of it, of this childishness that controls you – YOU MUST UNDERSTAND THAT AN UNCONSCIOUS PART OF YOU IS MAKING YOU CHOOSE TO DESTROY YOUR SELF FOR ITS OWN ‘LAUGHS’. See this is why we say the world is laughing at YOU, but you think its COOL, LIKE A TOTAL DORK, see they are ‘not laughing with you’, YOUR DEGREDATION AND ‘HUMILIATION IS FUN’ FOR THEM, it gives the insects of this world a POWER THRILL they will otherwise never have – SEE THIS CLEARLY IN YOURSELF. SEE THE COST OF EGO SAFETY TO YOUR SELF IS YOUR OWN SPIRIT, THE AWESOMENESS THAT IS GIFTED YOU IS DESTROYED BY THIS, YOUR VERY LIFE FORCE ITSELF, AND FOR WHAT BENEFIT EXACTLY, TO COMFORT YOURSELF AGAINST THE INFERIORITY OF A KID…
In order to help get this point across, I’m going to QUICKLY explain something to you which is rarely done at an animal level, but is obvious once you DEVELOP, AS IT REMAINS THE NO1 ISSUES BETWEEN ‘US AND THEM’:
YOU CANNOT BE LIKED OR LOVED AS A CHILD – YOU CANNOT BE LOVED FOR YOUR WEAKNESS, FOR YOUR SERVICE, OTHER THAN BY YOUR PARENTS.
TO BE LIKED FOR YOUR WEAKNESS IS TO BE LIKED FOR YOUR UTILITY, FOR WHAT YOU DO – THERE IS NO ‘RESPECT IN THAT’ OUTSIDE OF YOUR FAMILY.
INDEED, YOUR PRIMARY FUNCTION IN THOSE TYPE OF PLEASER RELATIONSHIPS IS TO MAKE YOUR PARTNER ‘FEEL SUPERIOR TO YOU’, FOR A MOMENT.
THEREFORE OVER TIME YOUR RELATIONSHIP BECOMES ABOUT THE ‘FUNCTIONALITY OF PETTY POWER’, WHICH RAPIDLY BECOMES DISDAIN, HATRED.
YOU CAN ONLY BE LIKED OR LOVED FOR YOUR STRENGTH, FOR YOUR QUALITY, FOR YOUR ‘BETTER THAN’, AS THOSE RELATIONSHIPS ‘RESPECT YOU’.
BE CLEAR – TO BE LOVED BY YOUR OWN KIND IS TO BE ‘RESPECTED FOR YOUR QUALITY’, YOUR MAGIC, YOUR GIFT, THAT IS WHAT LOVE MEANS…
GIFTED RELATIONSHIPS ARE BASED ON ‘THE QUALITY OF CONNECTION’ WHICH BUILDS YOU THE INDIVIDUAL, NOT THE SAFETY OR FEAR OF YOU THE CHILD, WHICH KILLS YOU THE INDIVIDUAL – THEY ARE CHALK AND CHEESE.
BUT TO BE LIKED/LOVED BY ANIMALS IS SIMPLY TO BE USED AS A POWER TRIP, WITH CONSTANT LITTLE BATTLES AND ARGUMENTS YOU CAN NEVER WIN AS THE TOPIC IS IRRELEVANT – THEY ARE ABOUT PUTTING YOU DOWN FOR THE FUN OF ‘FEELING SUPERIOR TO YOU’, THAT IS ‘THE POINT OF YOU’, it is about POSSESSION AND EVEN MORE SO, CONTROL, it is about GIVING ‘POWER THRILLS TO THE POWERLESS’…
TRY READING THIS A FEW TIMES UNTIL YOU SEE YOURSELF IN IT, try and understand what it means for the patterns in your life, your future, your fate, and then maybe you will have a mental way into this topic that you will REMEMBER LONG ENOUGH FOR IT TO BE USEFUL TO YOU, for the CHANGE.
If you are GIFTED YOU NEED CONNECTION, and with no other development for the unschooled but HIGHLY GIFTED YOU WILL CONTINUE TO CHASE CONNECTION OUTSIDE OF YOUR RELATIONSHIPS, often making the same dumb ass mistakes over and over again, AS YOU PROJECT THAT NEED FOR CONNECTION ON TO WHATEVER ANIMAL TRASH IS PASSING BY.
Please be very clear – ANIMALS DON’T FEEL CONNECTION, THEY ONLY EXPERIENCE CHEMICAL, ANIMAL EMOTIONS, and even that shit is only felt briefly. See, ANIMALS DON’T REALLY KNOW WHAT HIGHER EMOTIONS ARE, but you do, don’t you, SO YOU NEED TO know that makes YOU different to THEM – YOUR EXPERIENCE OF LIFE IS ALREADY AT A HIGHER EMOTIONAL LEVEL, AS YOU WERE BORN WITH THAT LEVEL…
Do not underestimate THIS REALIZATION OF ‘US’ AND ‘THEM’, however much you have repressed your OVERLY SENSITIVE CHILDHOOD.
OVER 2/3 OF GIFTED WOMEN ALREADY FEEL THIS NEED FOR CONNECTION SO MUCH IT DOMINATES THEIR UNSCHOOLED LIVES.
So DEVELOPMENT QUICKLY BECOMES ABOUT LEARNING HOW TO USE SOMETHING YOU ARE ALREADY CONSCIOUS OF, ‘CORRECTLY’.
In my experience this is the VERY BEST WAY INTO DEVELOPMENT FOR HEDONISTS, BECAUSE IT ‘ACTUALLY’ IS A SUPERPOWER.
BUT FIRST YOU MUST GROW UP…
A personal note:
I’m going to take an extended break from writing this blog, not least as I must FOCUS MY EFFORTS ON THE FOLKS WHO HAVE ALREADY SHOWN SOME ‘BOTTLE’ AND ASKED FOR HELP TO DEVELOP PERSONALLY. Much as I don’t do this much these days, WHEN GIFTED FOLK ASK, I teach them, whoever they are and whatever they have done, ITS PART OF THE ROLE, much as its one I don’t always care for, HENCE MY RATHER INFAMOUS ‘EXERCISE IN STYLE’ THAT IS MY APPROACH TO THIS TEACHER STUFF – you can love it or hate it, but it does seem to work for my chosen demographic.
Anyway, several of these new candidates HAVE ASKED FOR THIS BLOG TO BE TAKEN DOWN AND ONLY GIVEN TO THEM PERSONALLY – they wish it to be exclusive for those who ALREADY HAVE THE TASTE FOR DEVELOPMENT, AND ARE CONCERNED THE HERD ARE STOPPING THEM, INTERFERING WITH THEM ON PURPOSE. They wish to protect themselves while they develop yet still have to keep up appearances, which in this day and age is very wise – much as development is ALWAYS PERSONAL, PARTICULARLY FOR THE HIGHLY GIFTED.
So this post will be the last for some time, and MY CONNECTION TO THE REST OF YOU WILL THEREFORE BE BROKEN, AS I HAVE OTHER STUFF TO DO NOW – this phase of my life is over for now, much as may return to it in later life to finish it up as a course of study. THEREFORE YOU MAY WANT TO TAKE WHAT IS IN THIS POST SERIOUSLY, or as much as YOU THE CHILD CAN TAKE ANYTHING SERIOUSLY, but please try not to con yourself – being GIFTED IS A CURSE ON A CHILD UNLESS YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH IT, which means you have to learn to grow up first, SO YOU CAN ACTUALLY HAVE A CONSISTENT PURPOSE, AN INTENTION IN THE MOMENT THAT REFLECTS YOUR GOALS, ‘WHO YOU ARE’. And you don’t, do you, YOU JUST DRIFT BETWEEN YOUR COMFORTS AND OBLIGATIONS LIKE A FOOL, yet still expect your life to work out, INSTEAD OF JUST GOING ROUND IN EVER DECREASING CIRCLES OF SHITE, THAT ARE NOT EVEN FUN FOR A CHILD ANYMORE. *Big, slow yawn…*
At this time I won’t FINISH this post BEYOND SOME FURTHER EDITS, so what you read below is imperfect and un-edited, but still contains the guts of GROWING UP. Make of it what you will, BUT FRANKLY, IF YOU DON’T EVEN HAVE THE GUTS TO REALIZE THAT YOU NEED EXTERNAL HELP, then what happens to you is NOTHING TO DO WITH ME, and I can no longer commit any further energy to you. TIME IS SHORT, MANY OF YOU DESERVE WHAT WILL HAPPEN TO YOU NOW, SO AT LEAST TRY AND GROW UP ENOUGH NOT TO CRY ABOUT IT LIKE A SILLY BITCH, eh. SORRY, BUT IT GETS KINDA BORING LISTENING TO ‘THE ENTITLED’ BASK IN THEIR MENTAL ILLNESS WITHOUT ANY DESIRE TO DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT – you are just excusing the EVIL in yourself for an easier ‘downslope’, plain and simple, LIKE A SELF SERVING LITTLE KID WHO STILL THINKS THEIR WORLD/TRUTH/EXISTENCE MATTERS TO ANYONE ELSE.
For the GIFTED AMONGST YOU I KNOW PERSONALLY BUT ARE STILL TOO SCARED AND STUPID TO SPEAK UP FOR YOURSELVES I WISH YOU GOOD LUCK with your struggles and comforts, with the emptiness and decline of your current existence. DO NOT GIVE UP ON YOURSELF, ON THE BETTER PART OF YOU, AS YOU AGE IT WILL BE THE ONLY THING THAT KEEPS YOU OUT OF THE FIRE, so I hope you find SOMETHING ELSE TO HELP YOU – IF YOU ARE GIFTED IT IS THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS IN YOUR LIFE, BECAUSE IT IS WHAT CAUSES EVERYTHING ELSE TO HAPPEN. TRY AND REMEMBER THIS, when in later life even you realize you actually need help, WHEN ALL YOUR ANIMAL LEVEL POWER IS NOW GONE, and you start to feel empty ALL THE TIME.
For the rest of you, the ‘MOSTLY HARMLESS’ OF THIS WORLD, all the little PARASITIC COKE HEADS, the RANDOM STONERS ALL LOST AND ALONE, the spectators that clap along at the back, the DRUNKS PASSED OUT in the alley, the ugly herd, the chanting rabble, the next wave of cannon fodder, for all the little rubber people that no one notices, just piss off back to your twatty little life now eh. For all your banal uselessness, know YOU ARE ‘THEM’, YOU ARE THE HERD OF COWS PASSING THE TIME BEFORE YOU ARE SLAUGHTERED, YOU ARE THE PROBLEM – YOU TAINT EVERYTHING YOU TOUCH WITH YOUR MEDIOCRITY, YOUR FAILURE, YOUR ATTENTION SEEKING BEHAVIOUR, LIKE AN INFECTIOUS DISEASE. For the more psychotic stalkers amongst you, don’t be surprised about what happens now – YOUR NARCISSISM WILL KILL YOU IN THE END, AND THAT END IS ALWAYS MUCH CLOSER THAN YOU THINK, PARTICULARLY FOR THE CREEPY TWATS ‘HIDING IN TOILETS’, LIKE YOU. Such a funny story that one, PICTURES AS WELL, wonder if it will ever get published…
So we are done now, so there is no further value in me being KIND to CLEVER LITTLE FAKE TWATS, as it was only ever done to help the others amongst you worthy of that help in the first place, so best not to delude yourself – ‘YOU ARE WHAT YOU DO’, even if that is little more than a MENTALLY ILL crack whore, ONE OF THE MANY ACCEPTABLE CURSES OF OUR MODERN AGE. I don’t mean to be mean for no reason, I MEAN TO MEAN CAUSE YOU ARE A PARASITE WHO DOES NOT BELONG HERE, and SO HURTS THE CHANCES OF THE GIFTED WHO DO BY CHASING CHEAP THRILLS FOR A LAUGH, YOU FAT, UGLY, STUPID DORK.
Lastly, as is traditional amongst MY KIND, after a reasonable but short period I will take the whole BLOG DOWN, so for the remaining SHY GIFTED do PLEASE copy anything you wish to keep, much as I have given several other teachers permission to use elements of it. But my final word must be to Help You, so, for all the GIFTED WHO CANNOT DO A DAMN THING TO CHANGE, TO DEVELOP THEMSELVES, JUST TRY AND REMEMBER ONE SIMPLE PHRASE, AS YOU STEP BACK INTO THE CHILDISH COMFORT OF YOUR CHOSEN FORM OF OBLIVION, HOWEVER DRESSED UP BY YOUR FAKE ANTI-HERO TO APPEAR COOL, WHILST ACTUALLY BEING SICKENING TO WATCH – ‘I AM GIFTED, I AM BETTER THAN THIS’ – SAID SLOWLY, PRECISELY, AND WITH AS MUCH EMOTION IN THE MOMENT AS YOU CAN MUSTER. Then one day maybe you will be, if you live long enough, BY WHICH I MEAN IF YOU ACTUALLY ‘WANT’ TO ‘LIVE’ ENOUGH.
Before you read on now, try and hold this TRUTH IN YOUR MIND FOR AS LONG AS YOU CAN – AS A GIFTED CHILD YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHO YOU ARE, WHAT YOU ARE DOING, OR WHY YOU ARE DOING IT. Who ‘YOU THINK YOU ARE’, WHAT ‘YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING’ AND ‘WHY YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING IT’ IS ALL A VEIL DESIGNED TO CONCEAL THE TRUTH FROM YOU, and you will NEVER KNOW WHAT IS BEHIND THAT VEIL UNLESS GROW UP. See in your actual CHILDHOOD, at some moment or 2 you FAILED EVOLUTION 101, AND HANDED OVER TOTAL CONTROL OF YOURSELF TO YOUR UNCONSCIOUS ‘CHARACTER OF NO CHARACTER’, BECAUSE YOU REFUSED TO TAKE THAT RESPONSIBILITY ON YOURSELF CONSCIOUSLY, OUT OF IGNORANCE. So now that is all you are, A PUPPET IN A SHOW, who thinks the crowd is CLAPPING when they are actually LAUGHING AT YOU, AND YOU LACK THE GUTS TO ‘EVEN WANT TO SEE THAT’.
This is growing up 101, what you should have been taught in school, so hold this in your mind if you can, all the time. If you helps at all please comfort yourself with the knowledge that you must hate and fear the people your god sends to help YOU, HATE THE VISCERAL EFFECT THEY HAVE ON YOU, because ‘YOU THE CHILD’ KNOWS THEY HAVE COME TO KILL IT, that is why IT MAKES YOU hate and fear them. SO BE ASSURED WE KNOW THAT, BECAUSE WE ARE SMARTER THAN YOU, AS WE KNOW ‘YOU HAVE HAPPENED BEFORE’, BECAUSE ‘EVERYTHING HAS HAPPENED BEFORE’, and we LOVE IT, indeed folks like me kinda live for this shit…
SEE WE KNOW HOW TO PLAY THIS GAME BETTER THAN YOU DO, SO KNOW EVERYTHING IS A TEST, KNOW YOU ARE BEING PLAYED BY US, IN ORDER TO HELP YOU STOP BEING PLAYED BY YOU THE CHILD, should you BE READY YET, WHICH YOU HAVE TO DECIDE – WE ARE LITERALLY NOT ALLOWED TO DO ‘AN INTERVENTION BY FORCE’, unless there is ‘danger to life’, much as even I don’t KNOW why that is. See I COULD GROW YOU BY FORCE IN A COUPLE OF HOURS BY SIMPLY SHOCKING ‘THE LIVING HELL OUT OF YOU’, usually by using the one aspect of your desires that is closest to your gifted self, BUT APPARENTLY THAT ALWAYS HAS TO BE ACCIDENTAL, otherwise its highly dangerous, and would break all but the strongest of you, *bigger yawn*…
But have a heart eh, IN THE MEANTIME, REALIZE THAT YOU, YOUR TYPE IS IN THE TEXT BOOK, that we know everything you are going to do, all your BIRD CALLS IN THE JUNGLE, and maybe, just for me, try and be a little more INTERESTING – pretty please with bells on, little ribbons and even one of them gold coins on a chain you really like, eh? I am sorry (NOT SORRY) for ‘WORLD WEARY MASTER TEACHER’ vibe check, but trust me should you ever decide to develop yourself as a GIFTED CHILD you are going to need the ‘GALLOWS HUMOUR OF THE GIFTED’, as you are KINDA permanently in ‘HARMS BOMB SIGHTS’, and its as good a place as any to find you way into this stuff – it is the one I chose myself, all those years ago as ITS A FAVOURITE AMONGST THE HIGHLY GIFTED, cause its FORCED ON YOU BY YOUR GIFT in order to keep you alive and largely sane, at least as long as YOUR GIFT HOLDS OUT, that is.
So how is your GIFT holding up, honey bunny..? Ahhh, things are starting to creak a little eh, starting to fray at the edges emotionally, not the badass motherfucker you always hoped for eh, and the mirror is starting to laugh back at you every morning… Sorry to hear that, but know its all good – you are still alive – but just remember for that next little adventure its a good idea to try and make it home with your knickers on your ass, instead of in your handbag, or for some you, ‘on your head’. So I will leave you with the immortal wisdom of the lyrical genius and hard core 4th Way devotee who was Gerry Raffetry, kinda growing up 101 for all you bitches who missed that as a kid, so still think the petty self-destruction of your fake anti-hero is in someway ‘cool’, and not just more blah, blah, fucking blah, like we do…
‘You gotta grow, you gotta learn by your mistakes, YOU GOTTA DIE A LITTLE EVERYDAY JUST TO TRY AND STAY AWAKE, no use complaining, don’t you worry, don’t you whine, CAUSE IF YOU GET IT WRONG YOU GET IT RIGHT next time..’ (Sorry, Get It Right Next Time..). Should you have looked that song up and find it charms you in anyway please choose it as your theme tune, it was designed for this purpose, with all it ridiculously over the top, multi layered production, and you will never find an easier way to break the reliance on the external validation OF CREEPY TWATS than finding YOUR personal validation in this song…
For all the unschooled gifted out there – See ya, wouldn’t wanna be ya…
For the rest of you bunch of cunts – Smell ya, shouldn’t have to tell ya…
For all of MY DEVOTED LITTLE FAN CLUB – Just try and kick it up a notch and grow a pair eh, you are so very DEAD for such a very long time, after all – TRY AND ACTUALLY ‘DO’ CONFLICT INSTEAD OF BEING A PEOPLE PLEASING WHORE, eh, IF NOTHING ELSE YOU WILL PROVE MY INITIAL ASSESSMENT OF YOU WRONG, and would you not like to ‘actually’ be clever for once… Frankly I’m right so much it gets kinda dull, I actually love it when I’m wrong, here’s hoping –
Finally, for the HIGHLY GIFTED FRUIT LOOPS – Ding, Dong, MY PRETTY – TRY AND WORK THIS LAST BIT OUT FOR YOURSELF, try and be smart enough to be interesting, TRY AND DO SOMETHING UNEXPECTED, search your soul for the energy to do something BETTER THAN FOR YOURSELF, surprise me – its already too late for you, so what does it matter, eh, you have what you wanted, what you invested so much of your time and effort into, so there is nothing to lose, you have nothing more or less than what was expected of you, of your type, so try and see it that way, the same STEREOTYPICAL well-trodden path we see, it may help THE CHANGE.
SO ONE LAST TIME JUST FOR YOU – EVERYTHING HAS HAPPENED BEFORE, YOUR EXACT CIRCUMSTANCE AND BEHAVIOR HAVE HAPPENED BEFORE, countless times – so get the fuck over the self indulgent drama of it, take some interest in your future instead – YOU ONLY CHANCE NOW IS TO REALIZE YOU ARE SIMPLY ACTING OUT A BANAL STEREOTYPE, just the same as I and many 10,000s of us have had to face before we could change. Hell, you are not even a particularly good version of it, I’VE SEEN WAY BETTER OVER THE YEARS, so are YOU NOT A LITTLE EMBARRASSED TO BE YOU, you are barely a 5/10, you stink up the place as it seems to me your heart is simply not in it anymore.
So why not have a break from being such a fake, gutless little bitch, you can always go right back to your petty self-sabotage, self-destruction and self-hatred tomorrow, eh, nobody will care, as nobody will notice. SO TAKE TODAYS VICTORY, TAKE THE CLEVERNESS OF A PANTOMINE VILLAIN and SNIGGER FOR A MOMENT IN THE CORNER OF YOUR BEDROOM LIKE YOU ARE QUEEN OF THE WORLD, as later it will at least help you justify everything you have lost, and can never get back.
See WE KNOW, for the very best candidates, YOU HAVE TO LOSE ALMOST EVERYTHING, FIRST – THE EVIL IN YOU HAS TO BE BROKEN LIKE A HORSE, HELL EVEN YOU KNOW THIS, DON’T YOU, AS YOU ARE ALSO TESTING ‘US’, ARE YOU NOT. See YOU NEED A REALLY GOOD REASON TO STOP, EVEN WHEN YOU ACTUALLY WANT TO – always found this aspect of the human condition kinda odd myself, but its the same for everyone – YOU MUST BE ‘CONQUERED BY THE TRUTH’, VANQUISHED BY ‘THE HIGHER QUALITY’ OF IT in order TO ASPIRE TO BE IT, otherwise you just fight on even when you know you are beaten, before simply running away when it finally exhausts you AS YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT ELSE TO DO WITH YOURSELF, do you…
So take a moment now to stare off into the distance and understand why this is the way it is, why it has all happened THIS WAY for you and so many others BETTER THAN YOU. But sure, IQs do seem to have dropped radically in my absence, including yours, SO MAYBE don’t chance it JUST yet, YOU ARE SO SPECIAL – YOU CAN BLANK IT ALL OUT FOR ANOTHER 5 YEARS AND STILL BOUNCE RIGHT BACK, EH. See, the reason I’m telling you all of this is that I ACTUALLY WANT YOU TO FAIL SO OTHERS CAN SUCCEED, AS YOU HAVE FAILED TO GRASP THE NECESSARY EVIL THAT IS THE ‘COMPETITIVE NATURE OF DEVELOPMENT’, AS THAT IS HOW YOU GET THE ENERGY TO START, AS OTHERWISE YOU WILL ALWAYS BE TO WEAK to DO IT. So helping you before that is a waste of my time, AS YOU CAN’T CHANGE WHEN YOU STILL THINK YOU ARE ‘COOL’…
Be clear: YOUR MUST SEE THAT YOU ARE A FREAK SHOW…
EVERYTHING YOU THINK IS BEST ABOUT YOU HAS TO BE SECRET, CONCEALED, YOU EVEN HAVE TO LIE ABOUT IT, DON’T YOU…
THINK ABOUT WHO YOU ARE AS A LIAR, A CHEAT – SEE THE GUTLESS, FAKE TWAT IN YOURSELF, SEE THE TRUTH.
SEE – YOU ARE A LIVING A LIE, YOU ARE A CON ARTIST, BECAUSE YOU ARE TOTALLY FAKE, LIKE A LITTLE KID.
YET YOU THINK YOU ARE A COOL, CLEVER ANTI-‘HERO’ – BUT WHERE IS THAT HERO, THAT QUALITY?
YOU ARE DELUSIONAL, AN INSECT, THAT ANY FOOL YOU KNOW COULD CRUSH RIGHT NOW…
BUT THE WORST BIT IS THIS – THOSE FOOLS HAVE ALREADY CRUSHED YOU…
SO ONE LAST TIME – THE VERY BEST OF YOU MUST ALWAYS GET WORSE BEFORE YOU CAN TRY ‘BETTER THAN’, AND YOU MUST REALIZE WHY THAT IS, HOW IT HAS BEEN DONE, INDEED WHY WE APPEAR TO HAVE HELPED YOU WITH THAT… SO DO YA GET IT YET OR ARE YOU STILL LOST IN THE DESPERATE CLEVERNESS OF A PANTOMIME VILLAIN? The key moment will come when you realize IT IS ONLY YOUR DESIRE, YOUR RESOURCEFULNESS TO FIGHT AGAINST THIS CHANGE AS LONG AND HARD AS YOU HAVE THAT HAS EQUIPPED YOU WITH THE ABILITY TO CHANGE, INDEED THAT WAS THE WHOLE POINT, THE WHOLE TIME. Yep, in a very bizarre, but for you essential way you have actually been preparing to develop yourself THIS WHOLE TIME…
Weird, eh, but that is the GIFTED LIFE for us all, sadly you don’t get to choose how it works for you, much as we all tried to once-upon-a-time – LMFAO. Trying to compete with me is a mistake, I AM THE BOX-OFFICE YOU CAN ONLY FANTASIZE ABOUT BEING, whilst running in the opposite direction like a BITCH – do yourself a favour now, COUNT UP HOW MANY FANTASIES, HOW MANY STORIES, PICTURES, SECRETS, GAMES, DAYDREAMS, FLIRTATIONS, HOOK UPS AND LITTLE RELIEFS IT TAKES TO GET YOU THROUGH THE DAY, and know that those things ACTUALLY MAKE YOU AN EVEN BIGGER FAKE TWAT THAN YOU ARE ALREADY.
See you don’t cause those things to happen, THAT IMAGINARY SHIT CAUSES ‘YOU THE CHILD TO HAPPEN’, they are all you ever do, so round and round you go – LOCKED IN A FRAME OF REFERENCE, A ‘NEVER ENDING TRAIN OF THOUGHT’ THAT EVEN A DISTURBED 8 Y/O WOULD BE MILDY EMBARRASSED TO ADMIT TO. Time to step AWAY from your ‘downslope’, as even you should be able to see its a fucked old mini-bus, full of pensioners pretending to be 21 again, on yet another day trip to a caravan park that reeks of piss and weed, time to have NO DESIRE to ‘relive’ this tedious shit EVERY SINGLE FUCKING DAY FOR THE REST OF LIFE. Time to be A BIG GIRL NOW, time to BE what you the child can only watch from a far, time to stop spectating and get in the game, well… at least learn how to bet on the result, SO YOU ARE AT LEAST INTERESTED IN THE GAME… (BABY STEPS – LOL).
BUT FOR THE HIGHLY GIFTED, MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE TRY AND GET THE ‘US AND THEM’ THING, TO PUSH PAST YOUR SOCIETAL PROGRAMMING AND KNOW YOU ARE DIFFERENT TO NORMAL PEOPLE, AND HENCE STOP TRYING TO BE NORMAL PEOPLE, STOP TRYING TO FIT IN. THE COMPULSION YOU FEEL TO CHASE ‘CONNECTION’ IS ONLY FOR YOUR OWN KIND, THE ANIMALS DON’T FEEL IT AND SO JUST USE IT AGAINST YOU, WHILST THINKING YOU ARE A TOTAL FOOL, A FLAKE, A FUCK UP, SO THEY SIMPLY USE YOU FOR A POWER TRIP. YOU ARE NOT WORSE THAN THEM, YOU ARE NOT A FOOL, YOU JUST DON’T UNDERSTAND YOURSELF YET, SO CONSTANTLY MAKE MISTAKES YOU HAVE TO JUSTIFY – YOU ARE BETTER THAN THEM. SO UNDERSTAND THE POINT OF ELITISM IS TO LIFT YOU OUT OF THE POOR CHOICES YOU CURRENTLY MAKE, UNDERSTAND ITS POWER TO SAVE YOU – YOU ARE BETTER THAN.
THERE IS NO POINT IN TRYING TO HIDE YOUR GIFT, DESTROY IT, OR SELL IT OFF FOR CHEAP THRILLS, IT ALREADY DOMINATES EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENS TO YOU – YOU MUST FACE IT OR BURN. SO ASK YOURSELF THIS QUESTION – WHY DO YOU WANT TO BE NORMAL WHEN YOU ALREADY KNOW YOUR WHOLE LIFE IS DOMINATED BY CHASING A SUPERNATURAL LEVEL OF CONNECTION, THAT ONLY 1 IN A 10 CAN FEEL EVEN VAGUELY, AND 1 IN 1000 CAN ACHIEVE A CONSTANT STATE OF CONNECTION TO YOUR OWN KIND – HAVE YOU NOT ALREADY MADE THE CHOICE TO CHASE YOUR OWN DEVELOPMENT..?
THEREFORE YOU MAY WANT TO TRY AND DO IT PROPERLY, EH – THERE IS NOTHING SADDER IN THIS WORLD THAN TRYING TO HELP THE SICK, DESPERATE AND BROKEN AT THE END, WHEN ALL THEY CAN DO IS GET BACK TO NORMAL, IF THEY ARE LUCKY – YOU ARE TURNING YOURSELF INTO NORMAL BY DESTROYING YOUR GIFT, SO YOUR ABILITY TO CONTINUE TO DO WHAT YOU DO NOW WILL BE GONE SOON ENOUGH, THAT IS HOW THIS WORKS…
BUT, IF YOU CAN ADMIT YOU THE CHILD HAS LOST, TO YOURSELF, THEN YOU CAN CHANGE, AND IF YOU CAN CHANGE YOU CAN SEE INTO YOUR REAL, TRUE NATURE THAT WAS GIFTED TO YOU BY YOUR ANCESTORS, YOU CAN ‘BECOME YOURSELF’ – IT IS A VERY SMALL PRICE TO PAY FOR SUCH A BIG PRIZE, BUT RIGHT NOW, WHILE NOW YOU STILL THINK YOU HAVE ENOUGH WORTH KEEPING, YOU WILL FIGHT ON TO PROTECT WHAT YOU THINK YOU HAVE, AGAINST WHAT YOU ACTUALLY ARE.
SO MY ADVICE IS THIS – FIND AWAY TO DO BOTH AT THE START, OTHERS HAVE, I DID, MY TEACHERS DID – TO CHANGE YOUR LIFE WHILST YOU ARE STILL LIVING YOUR OLD ONE. SO VERY MANY OF YOU ONLY MANAGE TO START WHEN YOU MAKE SOME SUBTLE REFRAMING OF WHAT THIS IS FOR YOU, AND THAT REFRAMING ALLOWS YOU TO WILLING SACRIFICE ELEMENTS OF YOURSELF FOR THIS GREATER PERSONAL GOOD, BECAUSE OTHERWISE YOU CAN NEVER GO AGAINST YOURSELF…
FIND AWAY ‘TO CHOOSE TO LOSE’, JUSTIFIED BY A MUCH GREATER VICTORY FOR ‘YOU THE CHILD’.
YES – FIND A WAY YOU CAN ‘WIN BY LOSING’ IN YOUR EVERYDAY WORLD, YOUR NORMAL.
FIND A WAY TO ‘SACRIFICE’ YOUR OLD SELF, THAT REWARDS YOU ‘IN THE NOW’.
THEN YOU WILL UNDERSTAND ELITISM, ONCE AND FOR ALL…
YOU MAY EVEN WANT TO STOP BEING AN INSECT…
See I understand, better than most, that when the HIGHLY GIFTED REALIZE THEIR ANIMAL POWERS, (WHICH ORIGINATE IN THEIR GIFT) ARE DECLINING, to the point that they have to humiliate themselves in EVEN their own eyes by CONTINUALLY DROPPING THE STANDARD OF THEIR OPPONENTS IN THE COMPETITION FOR ‘THE WINS’ THEY CRAVE, they are OFTEN prepared to TRY ANYTHING IN ORDER TO FIX THAT. SEE THERE IS A PARTICULAR TYPE OF SELF-HATRED, SELF-PITY THAT COMES FROM THE REPEATED FAILURE OF SPECIAL STUFF YOU USED TO BE ABLE TO DO THAT RAPIDLY BECOMES UNBEARABLE, PARTICULARLY IN PRETTY WOMEN, AND CAN LEAD TO SEMI-PERMANENT LOW MOOD OF NOSTALGA THAT FEELS/LOOKS LIKE MENTAL ILLNESS, even though in all other areas of your life you are FINE, SAFE, SECURE…
If this is YOU, DO NOT HESITATE TO TURN TO DEVELOPMENT IN ORDER TO FIX THAT, PARTICULARLY if you are one of the classic type of KILLERS OR WITCHES, (IN TERMS OF ‘HOW’ YOUR ANCESTRAL GIFT ORIGINATED IN THE FIRST PLACE), as it is PROBABLY THE ONLY CHANCE YOUR ‘REAL YOU’ CAN REACH YOU – ‘you the child’ will have already destroyed all other avenues and relationships on purpose. However dangerous and misguided it is, the highly gifted BENEFIT BY QUICKLY DISCOVERING ALL OF THIS IS TRUE, and it will then up to you to decide if you simply want to be a ‘KNIGHTS TEMPLAR’ SWORDS MAN OR WOMAN, to be BETTER THAN IN YOUR CHOSEN FIELD OF ‘WINNING’, or whether you want to seek the true faith behind that power, and start for REAL. But you must COMMIT TO THIS TRADE OFF, of giving up something in order to IMPROVE YOUR PROBLEMS, even if your problems are simply how to be a better hedonist at the start – MORE MUST COME ‘IN’ THAN CURRENTLY FLOWS ‘OUT’ of YOU, FOR THIS TO WORK, plain and simple.
See, you the child will USUALLY accept, EVEN chase the ‘partial sacrifice’ of itself FOR A MUCH BIGGER PRIZE IT WANTS ‘URGENTLY’, allowing REAL YOU TO STEP OUT OF THE SHADOWS, so then you can start to choose who you want to BE today, BECAUSE YOU WILL UNDERSTAND ELITISM. In the sense of the practical magic of the LEFT-HAND PATH, THIS IS NOT WEIRD OR EVEN UNUSUAL – IT HAS BEEN THE PREDOMINANT PATH IN THE WEST FOR A THOUSAND YEARS OR MORE FOR ‘THE WARRIOR CLASS’, hidden behind Christianity, just not the stale, left wing crap you know – back a thousand years ago Christianity was MAGIC…
‘THE OBSTACLE IS THE PATH’ – (Sorry Zen..)
Teacher Note – Should you be a 4th way Teacher who now feels a burning desire to chide me for giving out this ‘dangerous’ blanket advice on an issue that should only ever be done based on very personal circumstance, DON’T – YOU HAVE NO IDEA JUST HOW MANY HIGHLY GIFTED WOMEN I HAVE MET OVER THE YEARS WHO HAVE DESTROYED THEMSELVES FOR WANT OF THIS SIMPLE GUIDANCE. See when folks hit this issue hard in this day and age THEY TEND TO DOUBLE DOWN ON THE ‘WIN CHASE’, OFTEN REMOVING ANY STANDARDS AT ALL IN A UNSCHOOLED ATTEMPT TO FIX THE ISSUE WITH EVEN MORE OF THE SAME BEHAVIOUR THAT HAS CAUSED IT, so hopefully you can agree IT IS BETTER THAN THAT.
See this clearly – once GIFTED FOLKS DESTROY THEIR NAME, THEIR REPUTATION in this manner THEY STOP CARING WHAT ANYONE THINKS OF THEM, all and any fears which have kept them out of the fire thus far tend to evaporate, so there is no DOWNSLOPE, it is more like a CLIFF EDGE, which they compulsively throw themselves off everyday. Any danger in my approach means nothing in comparison to that, as I hope you can agree – WE LIVE IN AN AGE WHERE THE ‘LAST RESORT’ OF DEVELOPMENT ADVICE IS QUICKLY BECOMING THE ‘FIRST ONE’, as modern society has none of the ‘enforced’ classic standards or class systems to protect people from themselves…
Hugs
TOB (July 2024)
PS – In light of what I have just said above I will add this advice, with the same Last Resort ethos I used to justify the above…
‘You need direction, yeah you NEED A NAME, when you’re standing at the crossroads every highway looks the same. After a while you get to recognize ‘THE SIGNS’, so if you get it wrong you get it right next time…’.
So I will do you one final favor before I go… I will touch on one of the 2 greatest pieces of advice you can give anyone who otherwise rejects any and all spiritual conversation: YOUR NAME AND THE NEED TO IGNORE ANY AND ALL ACCIDENTAL HAPPENINGS AS DISTRACTIONS, which should be self-explanatory…
I HAVE A ‘NAME’ that carries the weight of who I am in all the various arenas of my life, indeed EVERY 4TH WAYER I KNOW WORTH HIS SALT HAS A ‘NAME’ AS A VERY DISTINCT INDIVIDUAL, LOVE THEM OR HATE THEM, I, and they, stand by it ’till death do us part’ – it works like a TITLE, not a societal Tax ID.
See if you are GIFTED YOUR GIVEN NAME EXISTS AS A ‘THING IN ITSELF’, IT HAS POWER VIA ENERGETIC VIBRATION both in the SOUND OF ITS CORRECT PRONUNCIATION AND AS THE (USUALLY ANCIENT) SYMBOL ASSOCIATED WITH IT – ITS USE AND ABUSE FUCKING MATTER TO YOU, TO WHAT HAPPENS TO YOU. THIS IS WHY NAMES ARE USED IN THE MOST COMMON FORMS OF MAGIC AND HAVE BEEN FOR THOUSANDS OF YEARS, EVEN YOUR GODS ARE OBSESSED WITH NAMES, SPOKEN OR ‘UNSPOKEN’. If you have ever met me and noticed I was very precise in the use of your first name then be VERY happy…
Indeed, you may have noticed that MANY OF THE GREAT AND GOOD OF THIS WORLD ARE OBSESSED WITH THEIR NAME TO THE POINT THEY CREATE (USUALLY INCORRECTLY) SYMBOLS FOR THEIR NAME, because name magic WORKS AT EVEN AN ANIMAL LEVEL, so ACTS as a DOOR INTO THE SPIRITUALITY OF POWER. So here is the problem – YOU ARE NOT, ARE YOU, YOU LET YOUR NAME BE ABUSED BY CREEPY CUNTS AND COWARDS FOR THIER FUN, your given name simply does not matter to you, CAUSE YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT IT MEANS- YOU LET YOUR NAME BECOME A ‘CURSE ON YOU’…
So what does your name mean TO ANYONE WHO KNOWS YOU, eh..? or are you so busy HIDING BEHIND THE BANAL SECRECY OF A CHILD, that you are so terrified that any use of your name would simply make a bunch of CHILDREN YOU DON’T EVEN REMEMBER MEETING GIGGLE LIKE CREEPY LITTLE TWATS, so that YOUR NAME can never BE USED in PUBLIC WITHOUT FEAR. Is that you, is that something you want?
So maybe look around at the folks who have done that to you, WHO HAVE DESTROYED YOUR NAME, made you LESS THAN, and UNDERSTAND why you the child has done that to yourself – CLEARLY THEY DON’T HAVE YOUR BEST INTERESTS AT HEART, as it gave them a cheap thrill to destroy your NAME, to destroy any sense of yourself worth remembering TO MAKE THEM FEEL BIGGER ON PURPOSE – I KNOW OF SEVERAL CASES WHERE THEY ACTUALLY BRAGGED ABOUT DESTROYING YOU AS ‘YOU ARE THAT DESPERATE’, SIMPLY BECAUSE IT MAKES LITTLE CUNTS HAPPY, TO FEEL IMPORTANT, AS THEY DESTROY SOMETHING ‘BETTER THAN’ THEM, WHICH THREATENED THEM SIMPLY BY EXISTING.
And you let them, you let mentally ill animal trash wipe their feet on your face FOR CHILDISH ATTENTION, and told yourself it was COOL – try and see what that means, what being ashamed of YOUR NAME, being ashamed of what makes you famous means FOR YOUR FUTURE, it may help you want to be a different person tomorrow. See this is where many of the BEST OF YOU have to start, AS YOU MUST REBUILD YOUR SENSE OF SELF TO BE GIFTED, and that means you NEED A NAME YOU CAN USE ANYWHERE AS A BENEFIT, NOT A CURSE, NOT TO BE ASHAMED OF – YOUR NAME SHOULD CARRY THE WEIGHT OF YOUR REPUTATION AS BETTER THAN, THAT IS THE FUCKING POINT OF ‘YOUR PERSONAL NAME’, it not supposed to be a meaningless numeric ID on the ear tag of a cow in a field, that is for animals…
SO SEE IT NOW AND SEE IT CLEAR – THE FACT THAT YOU ARE ASHAMED OF WHAT YOUR NAME MEANS IN THE AREAS OF YOUR LIFE THAT MATTER TO YOU, THAT DEFINE YOUR EXISTENCE, YOUR FUTURE, DEFINES YOU AS A GUTLESS LITTLE TWAT, SO YOU WILL NEVER MAKE ANY PROGRESS ON THIS JOURNEY UNTIL THE TWATS THAT DESTROYED YOUR NAME START TO COWER IN HORROR AT ITS MENTION. YOUR NAME IS THAT IMPORTANT, BOTH NATURALLY AND (FAR MORE IMPORTANTLY) SUPERNATURALLY, AND WHY SO MANY GIFTED FOLKS HEAR THEIR FIRST NAME SPOKEN TO THEM AT ODD MOMENTS IN THEIR HEADS…
BUT IN THIS DAY AND AGE YOUR ‘LACK OF A NAME’ IS OFTEN THE KEYSTONE OF ALL THE HIGHLY GIFTED’S ‘OTHER PROBLEMS’, AS IT ALLOWS ALL THOSE OTHER PROBLEMS TO HAPPEN BECAUSE YOU REFUSE TO DEFEND YOURSELF IN ORDER TO CREATE THAT NAME, SO YOU HAVE ‘NO SELF RESPECT’, SO NO ‘POWER IN YOUR NAME’. Try and see this in yourself, see how bad it is for YOU, HOW YOUR LACK OF NAME MAKES YOU ‘AN EASY VICTIM’, A DOLL TO BE POKED AND ABUSED BY ANYONE WHO FANCIES A GO – it is a VERY EASY WAY into development, WHILST ALSO SHOWING YOU JUST HOW IMPORTANT ‘THE US AND THEM’ THING IS IN YOUR DAY TO DAY REALITY – YOU HAVE TO KEEP YOUR NAME OUT OF THE MOUTHS OF PARASITES, AS YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT GOES ON IN THE HEADS OF THESE CREEPY LITTLE SUB-HUMAN FREAKS – MANY OF THEM WANT TO HURT YOU MORE THAN ANYTHING, TO HUMILIATE YOU AS YOUR QUALITY HUMILIATES THEM, SOME EVEN WANT YOU TO DIE, EVEN TO EAT YOU…
See ONCE PEOPLE START TO USE YOUR NAME TO ‘CHEAPEN YOU’, USE YOUR NAME AS AN INSULT, as a way to give them a cheap thrill as they remember THEIR POWER OVER YOU, YOU MUST WITHDRAW YOURSELF FROM THEM, don’t matter if they like or dislike you, love or fear you, much as YOU SHOULD ALWAYS AIM FOR FEARED IF YOU CAN’T BE BOTH LOVED AND FEARED. Remember this… for some of you reading this your name is already largely destroyed, and you know it, which is why you are scared to use it. Fix this as job 1 in your quest to grow up – IF YOUR NAME, (THE KEY ASPECT OF YOUR PERSONAL REPUTATION) IS ALREADY A CURSE, EG RELATES TO YOU BE FALSE, SLEAZY, CORRUPT, 2 FACED, DISHONEST, DISLOYAL THEN IT WILL MAKE DEVELOPING YOURSELF ALMOST IMPOSSIBLE – YOUR NAME STICKS TO YOU AT AN ENERGETIC LEVEL, SO DEFINES HOW PEOPLE ‘REACT TO YOU INSTINCTIVELY’.
FIX YOUR NAME FIRST, IT WILL CHANGE YOUR LIFE QUICKER THAN ANYTHING ELSE AT AN ANIMAL LEVEL, BUT YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW TO DO THAT, NO IDEA HOW TO CLEANSE THE TAINT OF SHIT THAT PRECEDES YOU EVERYWHERE YOU GO, SO HERE IS THE CLASSROOM VERSION FOR KIDS LIKE YOU – EVEN IF YOU LACK THESE THINGS IN REALITY JUST NOW THIS IS HOW YOU MUST ACT DIFFERENTLY, SO YOUR WORLD SEES IT:
AMBITION KILLS LAZINESS
WISDOM KILLS ANGER
DREAMS KILL FEAR
GROWTH KILLS EGO
PEACE KILLS JEALOUSY
CONFIDENCE KILLS DOUBT
IN SHORT – GROW THE FUCK UP, AND KILL YOUR CHILDISH FUCK UP, BEFORE IT KILLS YOU – KNOW IT WAS ALL JUST PHASE… SEE YOU ARE NOT COOL/CLEVER, YOU NEVER WERE – YOU ARE ANOTHER LITTLE KID LIVING IN A 1ST WORLD ‘ANTI-HERO’ FANTASY. AND HOW SAD IS THAT – HOW SAD IS IT TO ASPIRE TO BE A SHIT VERSION OF THE AWESOMENESS YOU WERE BORN ‘WITH’, EH?
SO YOU MUST CHANGE YOUR FRAME OF REFERENCE AND DISSOCIATE FROM YOUR CHILD, AND YOU MUST DO IT HARD AND FAST. KNOW THERE IS NO COMFORT IN ‘RELIEF’ FROM A SHIT LIFE, ITS A CON, THE ONLY COMFORT IN THIS WORLD IS THE ACTUAL POWER OF ELITISM, IE TO KILL YOUR SHIT LIFE.
UNDERSTAND – IF YOUR LIFE WAS A GAME YOU LOST AN AWFULLY LONG TME AGO BECAUSE YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO LOSE!
SO DON’T JUST SIT THERE, SULKING IN YOUR ROOM, PLAYING THAT SAME CRAPPY POP SONG OVER AND OVER IN ORDER TO DROWN OUT REALITY, ACCEPT ‘THE HONOR’ OF FINALLY MANAGING TO DEFEAT YOU THE CHILD, AND START RECREATING YOURSELF IN ORDER TO FILL THE SHADOW THE AWESOMENESS YOU WERE BORN WITH HOPEFULLY STILL CASTS ON THE GROUND.
TAKE A TIP FROM ME , ‘TURN YOU HEAD’ A LITTLE, STEP IN A DIFFERENT DIRECTION TO MAKE SURE THAT SHADOW IS CAST IN FRONT OF YOU, NOT BEHIND YOU, AS THAT WAY IT IS MUCH EASIER TO SEE THE SIGNS AND FOLLOW THEM, AND SO KILL YOUR OLD MENTAL LIFE, YOUR OLD TRAIN OF THOUGHT, AND START MAKING A SUCCESS OF THE NEXT ONE!
BUT MAKE IT EASY FOR YOURSELF, IDENTIFY A COUPLE OF QUALITY PATTERNS IN THAT SHADOW THAT ARE EASY TO SEE IN THE WORLD AROUND YOU, AND KNOW WHEN YOU LOSE SIGHT OF THOSE PATTERNS IT IS ONLY BECAUSE YOU THE CHILD HAS USED THE POINTLESS DISTRACTION OF SCARY OR SHINY THINGS TO MAKE YOUR MIND SMALLER…
REMEMBER YOU CAN ONLY SEE THINGS CLEARLY IN THIS WORLD WHEN YOU CAN SEE ‘THE SPACE AROUND THEM’ – WHEN YOU CAN’T SEE THEM MENTALLY ITS BECAUSE THEY HAVE GOT BIGGER THAN YOUR CONSCIOUS MIND, AND THEN YOU END UP JUST GUESSING AT WHAT IS BEST AGAIN, WHICH IS THE PRIMARY REASON YOU LOST YOUR WAY SO BADLY IN THE FIRST PLACE…
HERES HOPING…
So now it is up to you to read the rest of this and START – FIND A WAY TO TAKE ON THE HIGHER RESPONSIBILITY OF DEVELOPING YOURSELF AS YOUR ONE AND ONLY REAL JOB. See, and just in case you are truly that motherfucking dumb and so this entire blog has largely bounced off you, KNOW THE VERY BEST CANDIDATES FOR THE LEFT HAND PATH, FOR THE MIDDLE WAY THAT IS REALLY ABOUT ‘RE-DEVELOPMENT’, ARE THE ONES WHO DON’T WANT TO DO IT, at the start, so know it is YOU THE CHILD WHO DOES NOT WANT TO DO IT, but ‘YOU’ DO, otherwise why have you read even this far you silly bitch…
SO THE WHOLE POINT OF THIS LAST PS SECTION IS SIMPLY THIS – IT IS NEVER TO LATE ‘TO BECOME WHO YOU ARE’ IF YOU STILL HAVE ANY OF YOUR GIFT LEFT, WHATEVER YOU HAVE DONE TO YOURSELF, TO YOUR REPUTATION. SO FIX YOUR NAME FIRST, IT IS NOT AN IMPOSSIBLE TASK, IT IS NOT EVEN THAT FUCKING DIFFICULT – ALL GIFTED, HOWEVER WASHED AWAY BY CIRCUMSTANCE, BY THE STUPID LITTLE HOLE THEY HAVE DUG FOR THEMSELVES, ARE WAY BLOODY SCARIER THAN THEY THINK.
DO NOT LET ‘YOUR NAME’, WHICH IS ‘YOUR FATE’ AT AN ANIMAL LEVEL DEFINE THE REST OF YOUR LIFE, HAVE THE GUTS TO FIX IT, AND BE READY, WILLING AND ABLE TO CRUSH ANY TWAT THAT TRIES TO STOP YOU, MAKE A POINT OF IT EARLY SO THE OTHERS WILL SEE THAT ‘TIMES THEY ARE A CHANGING’ – THEY ALREADY HATE YOU, SO WHATS TO LOSE, APART FROM YOU CHILDISH FEAR OF TRIVIAL CONFLICT, THAT IS..?
Yes, the FIRST REAL TEST FOR MANY OF YOU, indeed the one you have ALWAYS FAILED IS YOUR ‘INSTINCT LEVEL OF PANIC’ IN THE FACE OF CONFLICT, so you have had to DRESS UP THAT FEAR AS ‘A CHOICE YOU HAVE MADE’, so your FAKE CHILD IS ALMOST ENTIRELY CONSTRUCTED ON TOP OF THAT FEAR OF CONFLICT AS A CHOICE, WHICH IS TOTAL CRAP. This stupidity DAMNS YOU FOR EVER, so you must now realize that THIS 1ST TEST MUST BE PASSED – WE ALL LIVE IN A SOCIETY FULL OF ANIMALS, so you must accept that, PRIOR TO FINDING YOUR OWN KIND AND RELAXING INTO THAT COMFORT OF ELITISM.
You must LEARN TO DO CONFLICT AND TAKE BACK YOUR NAME FROM THOSE WHO HAVE STOLEN IT FROM YOU. Understand – because of this choice your entire LIFE IS CONSTRUCTED ON TOP OF WEAKNESS, SO YOU HAVE NO SELF RESPECT AND CAN NEVER CHANGE UNTIL YOU FIX IT, LEARN TO ENJOY IT EVEN. You have no idea just how bad everyone’s opinion of you is, WHAT THEY SAY ABOUT YOU, how much your vulnerability, weakness, AND childish fear precedes you into every single room you enter, BUT YOU BRING THAT OPINION ON YOURSELF EVERY SINGLE FUCKING MOMENT OF YOUR LIFE – YOU EXPECT IT LIKE A KID.
SO YOU ARE A ‘DOORMAT’ TRYING TO MAKE A LIFE OUT BEING A DOORMAT, CONSTANTLY TERRIFIED OF ANYONE WHO DOES NOT HAVE ‘YOUR BACK’ LIKE A COW IN A FIELD – CHANGE IT FOR THE PRESENCE, QUALITY, STYLE, CLASS AND THREAT YOU WERE BORN WITH, and then you can start the rest of this, AS YOU WILL START TO UNDERSTAND WHAT ELITISM IS PRACTICALLY, AND BECOME ADDICTED TO IT, LIKE ALL GOOD ‘ALPHA CHICKS’.
AT AN ANIMAL LEVEL, YOUR LEVEL, YOUR NAME IS ALL YOU ARE AS IT IS A REFLECTION OF WHAT YOU ‘DO’.
IF YOU DON’T MANAGE YOUR NAME YOUR NAME WILL MANAGE YOU – YOUR NAME TATTOOS YOUR SECRETS ON YOUR FOREHEAD FOR ALL THE WORLD TO SEE, SO EVERYONE LAUGHS AT YOUR STUPIDITY, YOUR VULNERABILITY.
SO ALL YOU CAN DO IS TRY AND MAKE MOODY ANIMAL FREAKS ‘LIKE YOU’ LIKE A CHILD, WHICH IS A ‘DEATH SENTENCE’ – YOUR ENTIRE LIFE STORY BECOMES ABOUT ADAPTING TO WHAT OTHER FOLKS WANT FROM YOU LIKE A POWERLESS CHILD, AND YOU HAVE TO MAKE A CHARACTER OUT OF IT, LIKE A DESPERATE CHILD.
IF YOU ARE DUMB ENOUGH TO ‘NOT FIX YOUR NAME’, THEN YOU WILL BE FORCED TO LOOK FOR HAPPINESS, FOR FUN IN THE GUTTER, WITH THE RATS, AND NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU ‘LIE ON YOUR BACK’ AND LOOK AT THE STARS FOR A MOMENT, YOU WILL STILL FIND YOU ‘STINK OF SHIT’ FROM THAT GUTTER, AND THAT IS THE SAME SHIT THAT EVERYONE ELSE CAN SMELL…
SEE WHEN THIS GETS BAD YOU CAN EASILY TELL – YOU BECOME OBSESSED WITH THE ‘LITTLE THRILLS’ OF ANIMAL SEX, VIOLENCE, DANGER OFTEN 2ND HAND, WHILST YOUR PUBLIC LIFE GOES TO SHIT AS YOU DRAMATICALLY UNDERPERFORM YOUR ABILITIES, CLASS, EXPERIENCE AND END UP IN A SEQUENCE OF DEAD END JUNIOR ROLES – A ‘BAD NAME’ KILLS AMBITION, FAME, OBVIOUSLY…
GET THIS – DO NOT LET YOUR LACK OF NAME BECOME AN INVISIBLE CAGE YOU LIVE IN, AS WHERE EVER YOU GO, WHATEVER YOU TRY, SIMPLY WON’T WORK – YOUR CHILDHOOD STATE OF MIND WILL OWN YOU FOR THE REST OF YOUR CRAPPY LITTLE LIFE.
FIX YOUR NAME, TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOURSELF – GROW THE FUCK UP, AND SEE YOUR CHILD DIRECTING YOUR LIFE BEHIND THE SCENES, SEE IT’S USE OF SIMPLE AVERSION THERAPY, ‘VISCERAL PANIC ABOUT TRIVIAL CONFLICT’ YOU COULD EASILY WIN TO CONTROL YOU, THEN START – THE EASIEST WAY INTO ELITISM FOR ‘THE BROKEN BY LIFE’, AND IT WORKS EVERYTIME!
TRY IT AND SEE FOR YOURSELF – YESTERDAY IS GONE, SO BRING THE ACTIONS OF YOUR TOMORROW INTO TODAY…
AGAIN – YESTERDAY IS GONE, BUT IF YOU DON’T FIX YOUR NAME YOU WILL WAKE UP EVERY FUCKING DAY TO THAT SAME YESTERDAY ‘YOU THE CHILD’ CREATED FOR YOU. SEE YOUR NAME MUST CARRY YOUR ‘WEIGHT OF CONSEQUENCE’, THAT YOU ONLY ‘ENJOY’ BEING KIND AND DECENT BECAUSE YOU ARE CAPABLE OF BEING ‘SAVAGE AS FUCK’, IF IT COMES TO IT.
OTHERWISE YOU WILL SPEND YOU LIFE PRETENDING TO BE KIND, GOOD OUT OF PAINFULLY OBVIOUS WEAKNESS, SO YOU WILL HAVE TO MAKE A LIFE OUT OF BEING A DOORMAT LIKE A CHILD, AS EVERYONE YOU MEET WILL SMELL THAT DOORMAT ON YOU INSTINCTIVELY, IF YOU DON’T FIX YOUR NAME…
Unless you are prepared to do that, PREPARED TO ‘DO’ THE CONFLICT, THE CHALLENGE, THE ‘DIFFICULT THING YOU WANT SO MUCH BUT ARE SCARED SHITLESS OFF’ THAT ‘YOU THE CHILD’ RUNS AWAY FROM EVERY BLOODY TIME (ITS ‘SIGNATURE MOVE’), there really IS no point in reading the rest of this – just fuck off and go back to being a gutless bitch. See a very long time ago a highly gifted French lady told me, that no matter how effective this CALLOUS style of teaching is, I should always remind myself that ‘I AM WHO GOD SENDS WHEN ALL HOPE HAS GONE’ to help ‘the darker souls’ FIGHT FOR THEMSELVES by example, as I used to be one – I should remind myself that it often takes a VERY long time for THE BADDER BITCHES TO GET STRONG ENOUGH TO SEE THAT, sometimes long after I have gone, WHEN THEIR POWERS HAVE DECLINED ENOUGH ‘IN ISOLATION’.
Therefore should you choose to go on with ‘YOU THE CHILD’, should you still be TO WEAK, just try and remind yourself OFTEN, IN THOSE DARKER MOMENTS OF YOUR ADDICTIVE BEHAVIORS, OF SELF-HATRED, SHAME AND ‘EMPTY NOTHINGNESS’ NEXT DAY – you are only HAPPY TO BE A CHILD BECAUSE you are PEOPLE PLEASING WHORE THAT EVERYBODY SECRETLY HATES AS YOU DESTROY THE INATE ‘QUALITY’ YOU WERE BORN WITH FOR A SLIGHTLY EASIER LIFE. It may help you, eventually, particularly when you realize that no one else will at ‘your end’, and that fate is already ‘priced in’ to your current ‘value’, which is nowhere close to what it was – YOUR NAME STINKS OF SHIT. If you are lucky, then you will start to feel TRIVIAL, ‘BENEATH YOURSELF’, and particularly ‘SELF-CONSCIOUS OF YOUR OBVIOUSNESS’, as that means there is still hope for your ass – YOU HAVE NOT, AS YET, MANAGED TO TOTALLY DESTROY YOUR SPIRIT.
But do watch YOUR FACE – ONCE YOUR LOOKS ARE GONE, and worse, ONCE YOU START TO SEE ‘SOMETHING ELSE’ RESHAPING YOUR FACE, ‘darkening’ your face, making it look STRANGE, ugly and unfamiliar even to you, that you start to look like the parent who was mean to you, if you closest and oldest friends start to make oblique comments about your ‘level of tiredness’, then your window to change is closing. One day soon you will forget yourself again and NEVER WAKE BACK UP FROM IT, AND THAT IS THE END – your CONSCIENCE WILL BE GONE, and everything will start to hurt and scare you AS YOU REGRESS – YOUR NARCISSISM GROWS AND TAKES YOU OVER COMPLETELY. See then you will be THE ENEMY of all GIFTED INSTINCTIVELY, and so that is how we will be forced to treat you, NO MATTER WHAT YOU ONCE WERE, long ago.
This is a particular interest of mine, so here are the stages to watch out for, the ones you see all the time in ‘PRETTY PEOPLE’ with ‘darker souls’:
YOUR RESTING BITCH FACE HAS BECOME COLD, STARK, BLANK, EMPTY OF ANY CHARM OF YOUR SEX, ‘ASEXUAL’…
THEN NOTICE IF YOUR MICRO-EXPRESSIONS HAVE BECOME ‘LOPSIDED, ‘SHADED’, ASYMMETICAL, UNEVEN, LIKE A CROOKED SMILE..
THEN WORRY WHEN THOSE EXPRESSIONS, THAT SMILE STARTS TO FORM INTO A SNEER or SNARL CASUALLY, UNCONSCIOUSLY, SO YOU CAN’T STOP IT…
THEN PANIC WHEN YOU THINK YOU ARE TALKING NORMALLY, PLEASANTLY, HAPPILY BUT FEEL YOURSELF ‘SNEERING’, SEE THE CLEVER NASTINESS, THE VISCERAL DEFENSIVENESS SPREAD ACROSS YOUR FACE, LIKE THE ‘EXCITED CRUELITY’ OF A POISONOUS SPIDER, AS THEN YOU ARE IN ‘TROUBLE’.
All very ‘Dorian Grey’ I know, but should you be highly GIFTED there is no escape – YOU ‘DOMINATE YOUR MONSTER’, OR ‘YOUR MONSTER DOMINATES YOU’, should you ever have ENOUGH BOTTLE TO BOTH RECOGNIZE AND SO CHOOSE YOUR FATE, that is. Indeed, should you have some genuine interest in Hedonism, in the Libertine Way Of Life, you should read this Oscar Wilde classic ON NARCISSIM, as it is very, VERY instructive, just don’t wait UNTIL YOU ARE TOTALLY INDIFFERENT TO THE CONSEQUENCES OF YOUR THOUGHTLESS ACTIONS, as then you will actually be to close to EVIL for any help to REACH YOU – you simply won’t care about yourself anymore, BECAUSE YOU HAVE CEASED TO EXIST AS A PERSONALITY, YOU HAVE BECOME AN ‘INFANT’.
Obviously, at that point it will be impossible to realize this, so the way you tell is when you start to find all of this development stuff ‘FUNNY’, even take it as ‘a compliment’ to your imagined ‘BadAss’, your Fake Anti-Hero. See you now believe YOU ARE ‘BETTER THAN’ US, BECAUSE WE ARE STUPID AND YOU ARE SECRETLY CLEVER in your lonely DESPERATION. So know the last step on that journey is the same as ‘Dorians’, however much you will need someone much smarter than you else to explain the DEEPER complexity of the metaphor he uses to illustrate that. Even I would not bother with you then, AS YOU ARE NOT ONLY A CURSE ON YOURSELF, YOU HAVE BECOME A CURSE ON EVERYONE YOU KNOW AND EVERYTHING YOU TOUCH, just like Dorian did, as that illustration is the actual point of his book – all the many people who try and help him are in turn destroyed by him. NO ACT OF KINDNESS TO THIS TYPE EVER GOES UNPUNISHED, which is the key reason I don’t bother being kind to ‘YOU’, until after we have broken ‘YOU THE CHILD’……
DO NOT UNDER-ESTIMATE OR IGNORE WHEN YOU START TO FIND ALL SELF-DESTRUCTION ‘FUNNY’, ALL HELP ‘FUNNY’, ALL SELF-DEVELOPMENT ‘FUNNY’, WHEN YOU SNEER AT ALL THAT IS BETTER THAN YOU – IT IS THE BEGINNING OF THE END, NO ONE WILL CARE WHAT HAPPENS TO YOU, INDEED FOLKS LIKE ME WILL BE GLAD YOU END BADLY, AS YOUR SACRIFICE WILL HELP THE OTHERS LIKE YOU SEE THEMSELVES IN YOUR SLEAZE, YOUR LIES AND YOUR MADNESS. More even that that, should you be GIFTED and have met me PERSONALLY then you either get better or get much worse AUTOMATICALLY, depending on how dominated by ‘YOU THE CHILD’ you are at that time, just in case you are too dumb to realize that – IT IS THE MASTER TEACHER THING, AND HAPPENS WHATEVER I DO, so don’t take it personally. See I HELP YOU OR I IGNORE YOU, so feel free to be as flattered or enraged as you like, THAT IS ‘HOW YOU LEARN’…
YES, WE WANT YOU TO BURN UP OR DEVELOP YOURSELF, EITHER WILL DO, I DON’T CARE…
ALL GOOD STUDENTS REALIZE THIS QUITE QUICKLY, THAT IS HOW WE KNOW THEY ARE GOOD, THEY ARE ‘WORTH IT’, THAT IS WHEN WE KNOW THEY ARE WORTH CARING ABOUT, AS PRIOR TO THAT THEY ARE ‘A NOTHING’, HOWEVER GIFTED THEY MAYBE.
SEE, WE ARE NOT YOUR FRIENDS – IF YOU ARE HIGHLY GIFTED I AM YOUR SALVATION OR YOUR DOOM, SO ITS BETTER IF YOU CHOOSE WHO YOU WANT TO BE, ‘YOU THE CHILD’ OR ‘YOU THE GIFTED’, DON’T MATTER TO ME.
BUT YOU DON’T BELIEVE ANY OF THAT – YOU BELIEVE IN ‘THE COMFORTS OF A CHILD’, SO YOU CAN FEEL SLIGHTLY LESS POWERLESS ABOUT ‘CLINGING ONTO YOUR EXISTENCE’ FOR YET ANOTHER DAY, WITH YOUR ‘PETTY PLEASURE’ AND ‘PETTY OBLIVION’.
SO TAKE MY WELL MEANT ADVICE – BEST GET TO RUNNING, HUN, AND STICK TO SMALL MIRRORS! IT WON’T REALLY DO SHIT, BUT AT LEAST YOU CAN PRETEND TO ESCAPE YOUR OWN SHADOW, FOR ANOTHER DAY…
BUT HERES A CRAZY THOUGHT – YOU COULD JUST SET A SIMPLE LITTLE GOAL TO BE BETTER THAN ALL THE ANIMAL TRASH THAT SURROUND YOU TODAY, AND THEN JUST SEE WHAT HAPPENS, YOU NEVER KNOW, IT MIGHT BE ACTUAL ‘FUN’…
THEN YOU MAY EVEN FIND THAT YOU NEED FOR THE COMFORTS OF ELITISM START TO ‘OVER-SHADOW’ ALL YOUR OLD SHITTY LITTLE COMFORTS OF A CHILD, SO SMILE WHEN THAT HAPPENS, BEEYATCH – ITS THE POINT OF THIS POST…
So just for the Highly Gifted I will end with that infamous quote from my fave Eastwood Western – ‘Now remember, when things look BAD and it looks like you’re not gonna make it, then you gotta get mean. I mean plumb, mad-dog mean. ‘Cause if you lose your head and you GIVE UP then you NEITHER LIVE nor WIN. That’s just the way it is.’ What that means is this – THE BIGGEST ISSUE FOR EVERY HIGHLY GIFTED WOMAN I HAVE EVER MET AT THE START IS THE HABIT OF LETTING YOURSELF ‘OFF THE HOOK’ EVERYTIME YOU FAIL, HENCE YOU STOP TRYING AT ALL AFTER YOU HAVE FAILED A COUPLE OF TIMES, LIKE A BITCH. Get USED TO FAILING WHILE CONTINUING TO TRY TO SUCCEED, START TO ENJOY TICKING OFF ANOTHER FAILURE – that failing is NECESSARY FOR YOU TO SUCCEED, you only FAIL TO CHANGE WHEN YOU STOP TRYING TO CHANGE, GET IT?
TAKE THIS LAST ISSUE SERIOUSLY – KNOW THAT I AM A LOT SMARTER THAN YOU ARE BECAUSE I HAVE SEEN, HEARD AND FELT EVERY SINGLE LITTLE THING YOU ARE, OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN. LIKE A CHILD YOU ARE EASILY LED, EASILY DETTERED, EASILY SCARED AND EASILY CONFUSED, all of which mean YOU GIVE UP, WAY, WAY TO EASILY when ALL you needed to do was keep TRYING. The greatest change in humankind that has happened in the last 100 years is that folks simply won’t even RISK SUFFERING FOR WHAT THEY WANT, because they ARE TOO COMFORTABLE IN THEIR DAILY LIVES, they have gone soft, AND YOUR ‘SOCIETY HAS NORMALISED IT’, MADE WEAKNESS ACCEPTABLE AS A GOOD THING, so know now YOU MUST ‘EARN YOUR DEVELOPMENT’.
Do you see this yet, DO YOU SEE WHAT I AM TRYING TO SAY IN THIS FINAL SECTION..?
YOU MUST CARE ABOUT ‘YOU’ IN ‘THE 3RD PERSON’ MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE IN ORDER TO ‘BE GIFTED’.
ANYONE AND ANYTHING ELSE COMES A DISTANT SECOND – YOU ARE ALL THAT MATTERS!
THEN ONE DAY, IF YOU PERSIST, YOU MAY HAVE ENOUGH POWER TO CARE ABOUT OTHERS WORTH CARING ABOUT, FOR THAT CARE TO ‘MATTER’, like I, and many of my kind, do. Until then everything that comes out of your mouth is a function of YOU THE CHILD, YOUR NARCISSIM, YOUR COMFORTS, YOUR FEARS, YOUR ADHD, AND IS NOT WORTH A DAMN TO ANYONE. So accept your fate, the fate of the HIGHLY GIFTED – YOU MUST DEAL WITH YOUR SPIRIT, or BE KILLED BY IT, so it can start again with someone ‘BETTER THAN’ YOU…
HOWEVER TRUE THIS LAST STATEMENT IS FOR YOU, RELATVELY SPEAKING, YOU MUST ALL THINK ABOUT IT LIKE THIS AT THE START, ITS VERY IMPORTANT, AS IT WORKS FOR THE BASELINE ATTITUDE OF YOU HEDONISTS :
YOU MUST CHANGE YOUR ATTITUDE TO LIFE TO ONE OF ‘LIVING UP TO YOURSELF’ EVERY SECOND OF EVERY DAY, OF ACTING OUT YOUR AWESOMENESS, ASPIRING TO THE POTENTIAL YOU WERE BORN WITH, AND STOP RUNNING AWAY BY TRIVIALIZING YOURSELF WITH CHILDISH COMFORTS.
SO YOU MUST BECOME ELITIST,
AND ALWAYS LOOK FOR ‘THE WIN’ OF BETTER THAN AGAINST YOU THE CHILD, RATHER THAN THE BANAL, HATEFUL, NOTHINGNESS IN THE ‘COMFORT’ OF LESS THAN, YOU TIVIAL LITTLE BASIC BITCH…
And Yes, FOR THE ONES WHO CAN’T OR WON’T DO THAT KNOW I want you to FAIL, so the others can see you FAIL AT EVERYTHING, can see what they will look like soon, THE NASTY POINTLESS WASTE OF IT, THE USELESS MENTALLY ILL TWATNESS OF IT, THE AWFUL CRINGE OF IT, IF THEY DON’T GROW UP. So crack on little girl, DO US ALL A FAVOUR AND BURN THE FUCK UP, bask in the cleverness of a Pantomine Villian, DROP YOUR STANDARDS TO NOTHING AND TAKE PRIDE IN YOUR PUBLIC HUMILIATION, anyway you like, everyone already hates you anyway, SO WHATS TO LOSE, EH..?
THIS STUFF HAS TO ‘STING’ – GET THAT YET?
THAT ‘STING’ GIVES YOU THE ENERGY TO DO, VERY QUICKLY, SIMPLY AND EASILY.
SEE YOU CAN ONLY USE ELITISM TO CHANGE EFFECTIVELY, PRACTICALLY IF YOU ‘NEED’ TO CHANGE…
Yep, that STING is you BEST FRIEND NOW, you need it, so don’t recoil from all my insults, USE THEM TO MAKE THE CHANGE YOU SECRETLY CRAVE, YOU SILLY LITTLE CREATURE, as I suspect no one will EVER care enough about you to force you to change – you are worthless to US UNTIL YOU CHANGE, SO NOBODY IS COMING TO SAVE YOU, they only care about your ‘utility’, you are a ‘slave’ to your ‘existence’, to the roles you play in order to survive, SO YOU ARE NOTHING…
End of personal note.
SO, over the last few years its become apparent to me that virtually no one, outside of certain types of CHALLENGING upbringing, KNOWS WHAT THE FUCK GROWING UP AS A ‘NATURAL MILESTONE’ MEANS IN REALITY, SIMPLY BECAUSE YOU ‘THINK’ YOU ‘DON’T WANT TO’ OUT OF IGNORANCE – the whole idea of MATURITY is ‘unattractive’ TO FRAGILE LITTLE YOU, and no one FORCES YOU TO ANYMORE, do ‘they’, indeed ‘you’ being ‘a child’ is far more profitable for ‘them’…
Yes, outside of the top of Society, and maybe Sport, the Military and some Organised Criminality, we have NO ‘CLASS SYSTEMS’ TO SHOW YOU HOW TO GROW UP AND REWARD YOU FOR THAT EFFORT anymore, society has regressed, our treasured equality has thrown the ‘baby out with the bath water’ – you have not been ‘raised up’, everything has been ‘lowered down’, instead. Sadly, YOU HAVE BECOME ‘THE AVERAGE’ OF YOUR HERD – you need to ‘react to exist’, you actually DON’T EXIST OUTSIDE OF YOUR REACTIONS, because you don’t SEE THE CAUSES OF YOUR REACTION IN YOUR CONSCIOUSNESS, you only SEE/THINK/FEEL your reactions, like a child, BUT YOUR REACTIONS ARE NOT CAUSES, THEY ARE EFFECTS OF YOU THE CHILD – CONSCIOUS ‘YOU THE MASTER’ HAS BECOME THE SLAVE OF UNCONSCIOUS ‘YOU THE CHILD’, WHO HIDES IN THE BACKGROUND.
JUST BECAUSE YOU DON’T FEEL LIKE A CHILD ANYMORE MEANS NOTHING – ‘YOU THE CHILD’ IS STILL RUNNING THE SHOW BEHIND THE SCENES.
THE ONLY WAY TO CHANGE THIS IS TO GROW UP BY CHANGING THE MINDSET OF A CHILD, THE KID FOREVER WAITING FOR ITS NEXT REACTION.
And this is the KEY POINT – YOU CAN’T CHANGE AS A CHILD, you can only ‘be changed’ by LIFE, by OTHERS, by CHANCE and even then you will fight it – YOU DON’T REALIZE THAT YOU LIVE CONSCIOUSLY ONE STEP REMOVED from your ‘decision processes’ which all happen behind the scenes, YOU ‘KNOW NOT WHAT YOU DO’ CONSCIOUSLY IN TERMS OF ‘WHY YOU DO IT’ UNCONSCIOUSLY, you can only justify it ‘afterward’ and call it a decision, which you have got so good at you now believe it is YOU. YES, YOU DON’T EVEN BOTHER TO CHECK YOURSELF IN THE MOMENT, do you, that is what the MIND OF A CHILD ‘IS’, and combined with the sexual maturity of an ADULT, leads to CONFUSION, as you can not BE SERIOUS, everything is controlled in the BACKGROUND, so you BECOME ‘UNSTABLE’, CHANGEABLE AS A NORMAL.
So today you must accept MY HELP, ACCEPT THE STUDENT /TEACHER RELATIONSHIP, AND YOU MUST TRUST THAT HELP – YOU MUST BE STRONG ENOUGH TO FOLLOW THROUGH ON THAT HELP IN ‘YOUR OWN TIME’. RIGHT NOW THAT MEANS YOU MUST UNDERSTAND WHY YOU DON’T WANT TO DO THAT, indeed why you HATE THE VERY IDEA OF THAT FORCED CHANGE TO AN EXTERNAL STANDARD THAT YOU DON’T AGREE WITH, even though you want the results of it more than anything else in the world.
See YOU WANT TO FEEL POWERFUL, for real, instead of what you normally chase, the comfort of FEELING just ever so SLIGHTLY LESS POWERLESS, for a moment WHILST DOING ‘SOMETHING ELSE’ YOU DON’T EVEN SEE, BECAUSE YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND THE POINT OFF IT. But when you do see the point of what you are actually DOING TO YOURSELF, when the veneer of FUN AND COMFORT IS STRIPPED AWAY YOU WILL BE FUCKING HORRIFIED, as everyone is at the start…
Yes, you must LINK THE PROCESS AND THE RESULTS OF THE PROCESS TOGETHER IN YOUR MIND instead of separating them, whilst understanding that YOU THE CHILD HAS TO HATE THAT AT THE START, as you need that FRICTION TO CREATE THE ENERGY YOU LACK, SO YOU CAN TURN IT INTO ‘BOTTLE’. See today I’m going to show how to KILL YOU THE CHILD, to quite literally EAT THAT BITCH ALIVE, but more useful even than that, I’M GOING TO MAKE YOU WANT TO DO THAT, even though IT will make you suffer, SO YOU CAN SEPARATE YOURSELF FROM THAT SUFFERING, SO IT STOPS BEING SUFFERING AND YOU CAN CHANGE – I’M GONG TO ‘CHANGE YOUR MIND FIRST’.
See today in order for you to develop some VALUE, I HAVE TO DE-VALUE your CHILDISH opinion of yourself FIRST, so you must SEE THAT I DO THIS OUT OF THE HIGH VALUATION, THE POTENTIAL THAT MANY OF YOU HAVE, WHICH IN TURN MAKES ME VERY ‘FOND OF YOU’, like a beautiful but feral cat that is all scared, scratchy and suspicious. IN MY WORLD THIS IS THE HIGHER EMOTION PRESENT AT THE MASTER TEACHER ‘LEVEL OF OBLIGATION’ TO HELP THAT LEVEL OF POTENTIAL DEVELOP, THAT MAKES ME SEE MYSELF IN YOU, MAKES ME WANT TO HELP YOU STOP DESTROYING YOURSELF for trivial, historic reasons you no longer remember, otherwise I simply would not bother with your dumb, self-destructive ass, would I –
So LET’S TAKE A MOMENT TO ENJOY THAT FEELING OF EXCITEMENT ABOUT THE FUTURE INSTEAD OF FEAR, INSTEAD OF ‘THE EXISTENTIAL DREAD’ OF A CHILD, but first some context for the ‘Thought Machine’ that is this POST:
NOW YOU MUST TAKE A MOMENT TO ‘PAUSE FOR THOUGHT’…
THIS IS BIG STUFF – DON’T JUST ‘BOTTLE’ THIS POST, STOP READING OR SKIM OVER IT LIKE A BITCH, ‘ALL BACK OF THE BUS’.
PLEASE, FOR YOUR OWN SAKE, STAY WITH ME NOW AND ‘FOLLOW THE YELLOW BRICK ROAD’ – THIS POST IS MAGIC.
SEE THERE IS ‘METHOD IN THE MADNESS’, A POINT TO THIS HARD STYLE OF DOING IT, OF ‘CHANGING YOUR MIND’ FIRST.
SEE YOUR MIND THINKS BEING A CHILD IS NATURAL AND BEING AN ADULT IS UN-NATURAL, A ‘FAKE GOOD’.
BUT IT IS THE OTHER WAY ROUND – GROWING UP IS NATURAL, AS IT ACTUALLY REMOVES THE UN-NATURAL YOU THE CHILD…
TIME TO BE VERY CLEAR – IF YOU HAVE FAILED TO GROW UP THEN YOU ARE STILL ‘CHILDISH’, BECAUSE YOU HAVE NOT CHANGED YOUR MINDSET, AND YOU THINK THAT IS NORMAL. THE MINDSET OF A CHILD IS A CAGE BY DEFINITION, YOU ARE A SLAVE, DEPENDENT, FEARFUL, WHICH YOU ACCEPT AS YOU ARE POWERLESS TO CHANGE IT. BUT BEING NATURALLY CHILDISH AS A GOOD THING IS JUST A PHASE, ONE OF SEVERAL YOU NEED TO GO THROUGH, IN ORDER TO BE AN INDIVIDUAL, SO YOU CAN ‘LIVE’, BUT IF YOU GET STUCK IT RAPIDLY GOES ‘STALE’, LEADING TO CONSTANT ‘SELF SABOTAGE’ – AS YOUR ENERGY DECLINES THE WALLS AROUND THE MIND OF A CHILD WILL CLOSE IN ON YOU, AND ALL YOUR FUN WILL DISAPPEAR…
SEE YOU ARE NOT SUPPOSED TO GET STUCK IN THE MIND OF A CHILD, STUCK IN THE ‘STARTING BLOCKS OF LIFE’, SO YOU HAVE NO CONTROL, LIFE JUST ‘HAPPENS TO YOU’, BECAUSE YOU DON’T CONTINUALLY JUDGE THE IMPORTANCE OF WHAT IS HAPPENING TO YOU AT A ‘BIG PICTURE’ SCALE, YOU DON’T SEE THIS JUDGEMENT PROCESS AS ‘YOUR CONSCIOUS NOW’. NO, YOU ONLY SEE ‘THE NOW OF YOUR REACTIONS’, AFTER YOU THE CHILD HAS ALREADY MADE ITS CHOICES UNCONSCIOUSLY = PASSIVE SELF-DESTRUCTION VIA THE INCREASING DOMINANCE OF MEANINGLESS LEVELS OF ANXIETY DIRECTING EVERYTHING YOU DO…
SIMPLY PUT, AN ADULT ‘IS THE FELT CONTEXT OF THEIR WHOLE EXISTENCE, PAST/PRESENT/FUTURE’, WHILST A CHILD HAS ‘NO CONTEXT OF THEIR EXISTENCE’, SO IS ONLY EVER ‘THE NOW OF ITS REACTONS’, FORGETS THEMSELVES CONSTANTLY, CHASES COMFORT, SAFETY, AFFECTION, ATTENTION, IN A NEVER ENDING CYCLE THAT WEAKENS THEM…
CRUCIALLY, AN ADULT CAN CHANGE THEIR LIFE BY CHANGING THAT CONTEXT AT ANY TIME AND FOCUSING ON SOMETHING ELSE, WHILST A CHILD CAN NEVER CHANGE, UNLESS FORCED TO, BECAUSE IT HAS NEVER LEARNT TO CHANGE – IT CAN’T SEE ITS DECISION PROCESSES, SO CAN NEVER CHANGE THEM.
But, yeah, I know – YOU DON’T CARE, YOU ARE A HAPPY FUCK UP, you are content to remain child as it PROTECTS YOU, COMFORTS YOU ‘from the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune’, that is your LIFE OF BANAL SLAVERY – YOUR DREAMS ARE LONG GONE. You ‘THINK’ you need that child to make IT ALL BEARABLE FOR ANOTHER DAY, yet even you are aware that there is no future in LIVING for your petty comforts, YOU KNOW ALL FORMS OF ‘DRINKING LEAD TO ALCOHOLISM’, that all NEED FOR RELIEF gets worse, saps your energy SO YOU GET EVEN WEAKER, DON’T YOU, but you don’t care, as long as you can feel briefly ‘clever’ a few times a day, its all ok for you, TO JUST ‘EXIST’, to simply go round the same circle, IS ENOUGH…
So – I HAVE TO CHANGE YOUR MIND TODAY, therefore a lot of what I’M going to say today is going to hit VERY HARSH, BRUTAL EVEN, BECAUSE IT HAS TO. So in order FOR ME to get you on this horse with a positive mindset I must play along with ‘You the Child’ in order to ‘BALANCE YOU’ – I MUST COMFORT YOU FIRST, SO ALL OF THIS IS ‘DIGESTABLE’ AT YOUR LEVEL. I need to do this at scale, cause it is the only time I’m going to LET YOU OFF THE HOOK for this entire post, as YOU MUST NAIL YOURSELF TO THAT HOOK for the rest of it, to have any chance in hell of growing up IN LATER LIFE – YOU NEED TO BE MOTIVATED.
The issue is simple – you will call the initial stages of GROWING UP AS SOME TYPE OF ‘TRIVIAL SUFFERING’, even though it is not, BUT in all truth YOU THE CHILD HAS TO FEEL LIKE ITS SUFFERING, as you need TO GET that ENERGY ‘BACK’ TO CHANGE. Always try and remember the more you want BIG THINGS if you are ‘UNSCHOOLED’ Gifted, the more your SPIRIT will put some form of suffering in your WAY, IN ORDER to GENERATE THE ENERGY YOU NEED TO PAY FOR THOSE THINGS – ‘THE OBSTACLE IS THE PATH’ (Sorry, Zen). So learn to embrace the suffering in necessary things, learn to PICK THE TYPE OF SUFFERING THAT SUITS YOU, see it has FREE MONEY, FREE POWER TO DO, instead of mild annoyance, of boredom, of discomfort, AS IT IS THE ONLY WAY YOU WILL START TO BALANCE YOUR KARMIC ENERGY DEBT (what you have already done to yourself) THAT IS FUCKING YOUR LIFE UP…
So know, RIGHT NOW AND FOR THE REST OF THIS POST:
NONE OF THIS IS YOUR FAULT…
YOUR IGNORANCE AND STUPIDITY ARE NOT YOUR FAULT.
YOUR SELF-DESTRUCTIVE COMFORTS AND FUN ARE NOT YOUR FAULT.
YOUR UNSTABLE CHARACTER AND TRIVIAL EGO SAFETY ARE NOT YOUR FAULT.
YOUR TOTAL LACK OF HONOR, CONFIDENCE AND SELF RESPECT IS NOT YOUR FAULT.
YOUR WEAKNESS, YOUR INABILITY TO CHANGE OR DO ANYTHING DIFFERENT IS NOT YOUR FAULT .
BUT IT IS ‘YOUR RESPONSIBILITY’ TO FIX THAT SHIT, SO IT IS TIME YOU START ‘FEELING’ IT BURN..
SEE YOU MUST UNDERSTAND THAT YES, YOU ARE FREE TO CHOOSE WHATEVER YOU WISH, TO BE AS BIG A FAKE BITCH AS YOU WANT, EVEN BREAK THE LAWS OF YOUR HERD, BUT YOU ARE NOT FREE FROM THE CONSEQUENCES OF THAT CHOICE, WHICH AT AN ENERGETIC LEVEL ARE VERY, VERY REAL = PROGRESSIVE SELF-DESTRUCTION, IN EVERY SENSE OF THAT WORD.
SEE IN THE END, YOUR END, IGNORANCE IS NO DEFENSE AT ALL – SHIT IS GOING TO HAPPEN WHATEVER YOU THINK – SO THERE REALLY IS NO POINT IN GOING ON PRETENDING TO BE IGNORANT, LIKE IT PROTECTS YOU, CAUSE YOU ARE NOT, ARE YOU – YOU HAVE A CONSCIENCE, OTHERWISE I SEVERELY DOUBT YOU WOULD BE READING THIS STUFF – ITS ONLY FOR ‘THE GIFTED’.
YES – YOU HAVE TO FACE THIS – TO ACT LIKE AN IGNORANT CHILD IS TO BE A GUTLESS DORK, QED – GOT THAT? CLEAR NOW? NO, NOT QUITE YET…? OK THEN, buckle up, ’cause here we go, see I’m ready for ya, I kinda knew a few hundred words was never going to MOVE YOU – you are all clinging on way too tight to the NOTHINGNESS IN YOUR SOUL, so tight that you have NO BOTTLE AT ALL, you don’t even know what the bloody word means, do ya.
SO even just a few words into this post, its VERY USEFUL TO UNDERSTAND, IF YOU ARE ‘GIFTED’, TO BE A CHILD AS AN ADULT IS TO ‘DISHONOR YOURSELF’…
GIFTED YOU, THE BIGGER, MORE IMPORTANT AND QUALITY PARTS OF YOURSELF DESERVE BETTER THAN CONSCIOUS ‘YOU THE CHILD’.
YOUR CRAVEN, LAZY, FECKLESS, COMFORTING, PEOPLE-PLEASING, FANTASY SHITE DISHONORS ‘HER’, INDEED ALL OF US – ITS DISGUSTING.
GIFTED YOU IS VERY SPECIAL, YET YOU DRAG HER THROUGH THE MUD JUST TO MAKE YOUR GUTLESS, SHITTY LITTLE LIFE ‘EASIER’, YOU STUPID HOE.
YOU ‘RUIN’ YOURSELF PHYSICALLY, MENTALLY AND EMOTIONALLY, SIMPLY BECAUSE ITS EASIER TO COMFORT YOURSELF, LIKE A BROKEN ‘BASIC BITCH’.
BUT I ALSO KNOW, THAT SOMETIME BACK, YOU MAY HAVE PICKED UP SOME EMOTIONAL DAMAGE THAT CUT SO DEEP AS A KID THAT NOW YOU THINK IT IS BETTER TO DESTROY YOURSELF BEFORE ANYONE ELSE GETS THE CHANCE TO DO IT, AGAIN, SO YOU WILL NEED SOME HELP WITH THAT SHIT..
BUT YOU DON’T EVEN REMEMBER IT DO YOU, IT WAS NOT EVEN THAT BAD OVERALL, BUT ‘YOU THE CHILD’ USED ITS FAVOURITE SHORT TERM MEMORY LOSS TRICK TO MAKE IT ALL GO AWAY, SO HOWEVER WEIRD YOU ACT NOW, YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHY IT IS ‘NATURAL’ FOR YOU TO BE THIS WAY, DO YOU, NO IDEA IT IS ALL ‘TOTALLY FAKE’, UN-NATURAL, A ‘HIDDEN REACTION’ TO SOMETHING FROM LONG AGO YOU HAVE LONG SINCE ‘BLANKED OUT’.
YES – IT IS THIS SIMPLE – YOU ARE THAT SIMPLE – BECAUSE YOU HAVE NEVER GROWN UP ENOUGH TO SEE ‘THE SIMPLE TRIVIALITY’ OF WHY ‘YOU DON’T WANT TO GROW UP’, ITS A CATCH 22 KINDA DEAL, BITCH.
AND THAT HAS TO GO, SO YOU CAN LEARN ‘TO WANT TO GROW UP’ – YOUR SELF-DESTRUCTIVE IGNORANCE IS NO EXCUSE, ITS JUST FUCKING SAD…
Hard I know, TO FACE YOUR OWN SOUL, but DO YOURSELF A FAVOUR, RIGHT NOW, TAKE A MOMENT TO ‘CHANGE YOUR MIND’ IN ITS MOST BASIC SENSE, AND HATE THE TRIVIAL ‘BASIC’ BITCH THAT IS YOU THE CHILD, in COMPARISON TO WHAT YOU KNOW YOU COULD OF BEEN WITHOUT YOUR INFAMOUS ‘WEAKNESS OF CHARACTER’, TO HATE WHAT THAT CHILD HAS DONE TO YOU, TO HATE ‘ALL YOUR FAILURE’. See we are studying MENTAL DOORWAYS TODAY, and much as I can show you these DOORS, you must FIND AN EMOTIONALLY WEIGHTED ‘DOOR HANDLE’ YOU CAN TURN ON COMMAND, and there is nothing better for an animal than the embarrassment of what you are already ashamed off, IN THE COLD LIGHT OF DAY – FIND SOMETHING THAT YOUR CONSCIENCE STILL TRIES TO SCOLD YOU ABOUT, AS THAT HAS SOME REALITY.
It won’t stick of course, YOUR ENVIRONMENT WILL SEE THIS ATTEMPT AT CHANGE AND JUMP ON IT FULL FORCE TO PUT YOU ‘BACK IN YOUR PLACE’, but that does not matter now, at the start, WHAT MATTERS IS THAT YOU CREATE SOMETHING DIFFERENT TO YOU THE CHILD, A DIFFERENT MOOD, YOU CAN RETURN TO RELIABLY. Once you have that we are going to use some magic on you to do the rest of it, AS YOU CAN’T, YOU NEED US TO HELP TO DO WHAT YOU NEED TO DO – YOU ARE TOO WEAK AND TOO STUPID, SO YOU SIMPLY DON’T HAVE THE ENERGY TO CHANGE DEEP SEATED BLOCKING PATTERNS, THE EMOTIONAL DAMAGE IN CHILDHOOD THAT CREATED THE KEY FEATURE OF YOUR EGO WILL WIN EVERY TIME (YOUR WHOLE LIFE IS BUILT ON TOP OF IT), so it is a good idea to accept that, and make the most of ANY TIME YOU CAN GET AWAY FROM THAT BITCH.
SO WHAT IS THAT MAGIC YOU ASK? That’s a bit more complicated than we have space for right now, but all will be revealed as you read on, YET TIME IS SHORT, SO RIGHT NOW YOU NEED ‘READ A HEAD’ AND START DOING A VERY SIMPLE THING – ONE OF THE MOST BASIC ‘GIFTED’ MAGIC TRICKS IN THE BOOK, WHICH, IF YOU ARE GIFTED AND DO IT ENOUGH, WILL CHANGE YOUR LIFE FOREVER, SLOWLY BUT SURELY – IT WILL STOP YOU ACTING ‘CHILDISH’ UNCONSCIOUSLY, as right now you are ‘blocked’ from seeing yourself do it, BUT SEE IT YOU MUST…
REPEAT, TO YOURSELF, THE COMMAND – ‘TELL ME THE TRUTH ABOUT MYSELF’, IN THE EXACT FORM I’VE JUST WRITTEN IT.
TRY AND DO IT WHENEVER YOU DON’T HAVE TO THINK, EARLY MORNING AND LATE EVENING ARE BEST, FOR MANY MINS, BUT YOU CAN DO IT ALL DAY IF YOU WISH, JUST DON’T TRY AND ANSWER IT, LET REAL YOU ‘SHOW YOU UP’, HOWEVER IT WISHES, BUT YOU DO NOT USE THE WORD ‘SHOW’, EVER.
DO KNOW IT IS PARTICULARLY USEFUL TO DO THIS WHEN YOU FEEL EMOTIONAL IN ANY WAY, FOR ANY REASON, EVEN RAGE, SEX, PAIN.
THIS IS A RINZAI ZEN TRICK, ONE OF THE VERY BEST, AND ALWAYS WORKS IF YOU ARE GIFTED, THEY DO THE FULL VERSION WHICH YOU ARE NOT READY FOR YET AS THE RESULT CAN BE DRAMATIC – ‘WHO IS (insert your CHRISTAIN NAME)?’, WHILST EVOKING A MOOD STATE OF GREAT, PERSONAL ‘DOUBT’.
SEE DOUBT AS AN EMOTIONAL STATE IS VERY EFFECTIVE FOR QUESTIONS, AS IT CREATES A TYPE OF ENERGETIC VACUUM THAT COMPELLS THE ANSWER.
BUT THAT TAKES HOURS OF PRACTICE, SO YOU NEED THE REPETITION OF AN EMOTIONALLY WEIGHTED COMMAND FOR IT TO WORK FAST…
See, YOU DON’T BELIEVE ME YET, even WHAT I HAVE WRITTEN SO FAR, you are just curious, aren’t you, SO I NEED TO MOTIVATE YOU WITH YOUR OWN TRUTH, NOT MINE – YOU NEED TO START TO SEE, IN YOUR OWN EXPERIENCE, JUST HOW BIG A NASTY LITTLE 2 FACED TWAT YOU ARE, ALL THE TIME, EVERY DAY.
SEE THAT TWAT IS WHAT YOU ARE DUMB ENOUGH TO THINK IS ‘THE AUTHENTIC, NATURAL YOU’, the thing you BELIEVE IN, what you trust your life to, IN BLISSFUL IGNORANCE. Sorry, but that ignorance has to go now, IF YOU ARE TRYING TO GROW UP, YOU MUST ‘WANT TO GROW UP’, so you must realize that YOU HAVE NOT CHANGED SINCE YOU WERE AT SCHOOL, you are still ‘CHILDISH’, that it what we mean by you being a TOTAL TWAT, GET IT?
YES, OF COURSE, ALL THIS INSULTING YOU HAS A POINT, AS IT IS A TYPE OF PREPARATION FOR CHANGE AT AN ANIMAL LEVEL, I MUST EQUIP YOU WITH SOME MENTAL WEAPONARY SO YOU CAN START WINNING AT ‘CHANGE’. YOU ARE GOING TO NEED TO ‘DISOWN YOURSELF’, DISOWN WHAT YOU ARE RIGHT NOW QUIETLY, INTERNALLY, SO YOU CAN ‘START’ THIS PROCESS, AND STOP COMFORTING YOURSELF, EXCUSING YOURSELF, ALLOWING YOURSELF, AND INDULGING YOURSELF LIKE A CHILD. And you can’t let your child stop you at the first hurdle, like it has so many times before, telling you something like you are SWITCHING SIDES, you are being DISLOYAL and they will ALL HATE YOU, but the friends of a feckless, creepy child are what made you feckless and creepy in the 1st place – TO CHANGE YOUR LIFE YOUR CHARACTER MUST CHANGE, be clear about this…
Anyway – THINK ON – have YOU not already DONE THAT SHIT ENOUGH, are you NOT ALREADY READY FOR A CHANGE OF SCENE, A FRESH NEW ‘LOOK AND FEEL’ OF YOU..? Well, be assured whatever answer your child spits back at you, WE sure as hell are – YOU ARE BORING AS FUCK, like. Seriously would you not like to move on from being the most uptight, transparent, flakey bitch in every room, that nobody ‘rates’, yet everyone ‘uses’, and then is compelled to take the piss out of later, like an aging office whore, who shames even her friends with her friendship, and they know it. YES, we must test for your sense of self today, YOUR SENSE OF SHAME, to see if you are capable of developing one, as you are ‘NOT IN KANSAS’ ANY MORE – ding doing, the WITCH is DEAD, otherwise YOU are THAT BITCH, ‘my pretty’…
DO YOU UNDERSTAND – TODAY YOU MUST DEVELOP THAT SENSE OF SHAME OF YOUR ‘CHARACTER’ – BE WHAT CONSCIOUSLY FEELS THAT SHAME, AT THE PRECISE MOMENT IT IS FELT (NOT REMEMBERED LATER), AS THAT IS ‘NOT YOU THE CHILD’, IT IS SOMETHING ELSE, SO YOU THE CHILD DOES NOT CONTROL YOUR CONSCIOUSNESS ‘ALL THE TIME’, so you can see there are times when you are NOT THAT BITCH, in that moment, AND YOUR CONSCIOUS EXPERIENCE OF LIFE CHANGES, WITH THIS CHANGE OF MOOD. You are going to need to develop this CHANGE OF MOOD, this time when you are not YOU THE STUPID KID, and get used to that separation, WHEN YOU HAVE THE SAND TO STAND AGAINST THAT CHILD, however briefly, so you can practice doing it, AND DEVELOP AN ACTUAL SENSE OF SELF THAT IS DIFFERENT, BECAUSE IT IS BETTER THAN, or at least aspires to BE – your SHAME is useful, because it provides you with a place to START, so never run away from it, let it burn, and don’t seek to comfort yourself, LET YOUR GIFT REACH YOU, should you have one…
So even before you START TODAY, get it clear in your head that there is a distinct part of you THAT DOES NOT ACCEPT FAILURE AS ‘FINAL’, like your child does, THAT DOES NOT GIVE UP TRYING TO CHANGE, even if it fails in the moment. That part of you IS YOUR SPIRIT, and when you let your SPIRIT BE BROKEN BY ANYTHING IN THIS WORLD you are DONE – YOU ARE A SLAVE FOREVER – SO TAKE THIS EXERCISE SERIOUSLY, IT HAS BENEFITS FOR THE GIFTED BEYOND ANYTHING YOU CAN IMAGINE. YOU CAN STILL CHANGE ‘YOUR STARS’, YOUR FATE, BUT AS A CHILD ITS GUARANTEED FAILURE, AS YOU WILL FAIL TO TRY AT ANYTHING, EVER AGAIN – you have to TRY AGAINST RESISTANCE because you need that MONEY TO PAY FOR YOUR GOALS…
SEE – You need to be clear about what has happened to you, and what that MEANS FOR ‘YOUR FATE’ – A LIFE OF NEVER ENDING, EVER INCREASINGLY, TOE CURLINGLY HUMILIATING ‘WEAKNESS’, that NEEDS THE CONTINUAL DISTRACTION OF PETTY SELF-DESTRUCTION TO GET ANY RELIEF FROM, AT ALL. So to paraphrase the immortal genius of Jung, (know however bleak you may find this now there is tremendous strength in it waiting for you later):
Everyone has the SAME chance TO GROW UP ‘ONCE’ – LIFE ‘asks’ you who you are, and if you don’t know who you are LIFE will tell you who you are, IN THE PERSON OF ANY OLD SHIT THAT SUITS IT AT THAT MOMENT, and that is when YOU START ‘TO LIVE A LIE’, as you are now trained to FIT IN WHAT THAT MOMENT – LIFE ON THIS PLANET IS NOT NICE, LIFE IS A CONTEST, NATURE IS RED IN TOOTH AND CLAW YOU, SO YOU WIN OR YOU LOSE, EVERY MOMENT OF EVERY DAY, SO YOU THE EGO WORKS HARD TO BE RIGHT, TO BE CLEVER ABOVE ALL ELSE, because that is the only way A CHILD CAN FIGHT…
Very quickly those lies start to build, the self-deceit starts to build, the subjugation of your REAL SELF, AS YOUR FALSE, INSTINCTIVE OPINIONS BECOME YOUR TRUTH SIMPLY BY BEING ‘YOUR POSITION’, ADOPTED IN CHILDHOOD FOR REASONS YOU CAN NO LONGER REMEMBER, THAT EVEN YOU UNDERSTAND YOU STICK TO SIMPLY OUT OF ‘EGO DEFENSE’ WHILST HOPING YOU MIGHT BE RIGHT BY RANDOM CHANCE ONE DAY, UNTIL YOU CANNOT TELL LIES FROM TRUTH ANYMORE. See those Fake Opinions WHERE YOU, THE LITTLE KID, FINDING THEIR FEET BY CONSTANTLY MAKING BASIC ‘STRAW MAN’ PATTERNS AS ‘TRAINING WHEELS’ FROM YOUR incomplete EXPEREINCES BEFORE YOU WERE FORCED TO REPLACE THEM BY REALITY, but now you HAVE GONE STALE, so you actually BELIEVE THEM AS TRUTHS, and engage in a form of ritual self-destruction in order to defend them, ALL THE FUCKING TIME…
So everything becomes a lie, and those LIES WEAKEN YOU UNTIL ALL YOU CAN DO IS COMFORT YOURSELF IN THE FACE OF THAT WEAKNESS, which weakens you further, until you NO LONGER have the ENERGY to stand against your fake thoughts, sensations and emotions, ALL YOU CAN DO IS REACT TO THEM, and call it NORMAL, LIKE EVERYONE ELSE YOU KNOW. IT’S ALL TOTAL CRAP, IF YOU ‘KNOW,’ YOU KNOW, LIKE SUGAR IS SWEET, SALTY IS SALTY, THE GRASS IS GREEN AND THE SKY IS BLUE FROM YOUR ‘PERSONAL EXPEREINCE’, BUT IF ITS JUST AN OPINION THEN SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU SILLY LITTLE TWAT, AND SEE, CLEARLY IN THAT MOMENT YOUR ‘NEED’ TO HAVE AN OPINION ABOUT ANYTHING MEANS YOU HAVE NEVER GROWN UP!
The constant justification of LYING TO YOURSELF, of finding a way to BE right when you are obviously WRONG is the CORE OF BEING A SILLY, CHILDISH TWAT…
See what LIFE asks you to do is GROW UP, SO YOU CAN BE SOMEONE, BE AN INDIVIDUAL WHO CAN STAND AGAINST LIFE, ‘CAUSE YOU DON’T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT FITTING IN WITH THE ‘LITTLE PEOPLE’, much as you may still need to lie to get along BUT you do it consciously, YOU NEVER LIE TO YOURSELF – YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE. This way you break the constant cycle of what they call ADAPTATION, where you simply fit in with whatever ‘happens to you’ and make it work, INSTEAD OF MAKING WHAT YOU WANT ‘HAPPEN’ BY ‘BEING YOU’, CONSISTENTLY. Otherwise, everything becomes adaptation, layer upon layer of ways to react to changing times that make up the bullshit you think is your character, creating a deep need in you for stability, to stop the constant reactions to constant changes in your environment washing your sense of safety away, SO YOU DEVELOP A DEEP SEATED ‘FEAR OF THE FUTURE’, and CONSTANTLY COMFORT YOURSELF TO COPE.
That is when you GET STUCK, like 90% of the modern world, locked into THE CYCLES OF ‘YOU THE CHILD’, OF COMFORTS AND LIES, and WITHOUT HELP you are fucked – NEVER UNDERESTIMATE THIS CONSTANT LYING, THE POWER OF IT TO CREATE A KIND OF ‘DAZE YOU LIVE IN’, WHERE EVERYTHING IS HIDDEN FROM YOU BEHIND LIES ‘YOU NEED TO BE TRUE IN ORDER TO COMFORT YOURSELF’. Then one day, near death, YOU WAKE UP AND WONDER WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED, ‘WHY IN GODS NAME DID I DO ALL OF THIS CRAP’, ITS OBVIOUSLY STUPID, YET YOU HAVE WASTED YOUR ENTIRE LIFE ON IT.
See the killer aspect of FAKE OPINIONS IS YOU BECOME ADDICTED TO THE EMOTIONAL INVESTMENT IN THEM, even after you the big kid NO LONGER BELIEVES THEM, YET YOU STILL HAVE TO REPEAT THEM, ACT THEM OUT, USUALLY AS PART OF SOME HERD NORMAL, TO BE SAFE IN A CROWD OF FAKE TWATS JUST LIKE YOU… Yes, right now, even if you are prepared to believe WHAT I HAVE WRITTEN ABOVE is ALL TRUE, your EGO WILL STILL DEFEND IT BY USING SOME LINE ON YOU LIKE ‘BUT I’M ENTITLED TO MY OPINION, EVEN IF ITS PROBABLY WRONG’ so I will simply choose the opinions I need to ‘FIT IN’, WHICH IS TOTAL CRAP – YOU ARE A CHILD LIVING IN A FANTASY WORLD of LIES, AND THAT JUSTIFICATION IS PART OF THE SAME SET OF LIES YOU TOOL.
One of the easiest ways to prove this to yourself overall is see how much of your life, how much of your thoughts and feelings are dominated by these lies, and how much your EGO USES A CONTINUAL STREAM OF URGENT, EMOTIONALLY WIEGHTED BUT TOTALLY TRIVIAL ‘IMPULSES’ OF CLEVERNESS AND ANNOYANCE TO CONTINUALLY DISTRACT YOU WITH CRAP SO YOU NEVER TAKE A MOMENT TO CONSIDER THAT YOU MIGHT BE WRONG AND SIMPLY ‘KNOW YOU DON’T KNOW’, INSTEAD OF A KID PRETENDING THEY DO KNOW = TO LIVE IN ‘A CONTINUAL SHIT SHOW OF CHILDISH TRIVIALITY’, AS THIS IS WHAT IT MEANS ‘TO BE NOTHING’, TO BE, TO LIVE AS A WEAK, STUPID, DELUSIONAL, DRUG ADDICTED MESS, 24/7.
YOUR FAKE OPINIONS ARE YOUR GREATEST COMFORTER AS A CHILD BECAUSE YOU USE THEM CONSTANTLY, SO YOU NEVER LEAVE THAT DELUSIONAL STATE OF MIND – THEY HIDE WHAT YOU ACTUALLY ‘ARE’, WHAT YOU ACTUALLY ‘DO’ FROM YOURSELF.
SEE IF YOU HAVE NEVER GROWN UP YOU LIVE IN A ‘FANTASY’ BY DEFINITION, A WORLD IS MADE UP OF ACTING OUT ‘EMOTIONAL COMFORTS’, ALL OF WHICH ARE UNDERPINED BY FAKE OPINIONS THAT ‘INSURE THEM AGAINST GIFTED SELF-CRTICISM’.
IN THIS WAY THEY BECOME THE PRIMARY WEAPON YOU USE AGAINST THE ONLY SENSE OF REAL TRUTH YOU MAY STILL HAVE IF YOU ARE GIFTED – YOU USE YOUR FAKE OPINIONS AGAINST ‘YOUR CONSCIENCE’, TO FEEL BETTER ABOUT IGNORING IT.
SEE YOU COMFORT YOURSELF FOR BEING NOTHING, KNOWING NOTHING, FEELING NOTHING, DOING NOTHING BY PRETENDING THAT YOU ARE SOMETHING THAT KNOWS, YOU ‘PLAY FIGHT’ TO DEFEND YOUR OPINIONS TO FEEL POWERFUL = A BIT LESS SHIT.
BUT WORSE, MUCH WORSE, THESE LIES WEAKEN YOU BEYOND ANYTHING YOU CAN IMAGINE, INDEED THIS ADDICTION ACTUALLY MAKES YOU ‘MORE NOTHING’ – YOUR WHOLE LIFE BECOMES A CATALOGUE OF BANAL, OBVIOUSLY SELF-SERVING LIES…
TRUST ME – IF YOU WANT TO CHANGE FAST START REALIZING IN THE MOMENT OF EXPRESSION THAT YOU DON’T KNOW ANYTHING, YOU ARE GUESSING AT BEST, AND LITTLE MORE THAN ‘WANKING OFF FOR A CHEAP THRILL’ LIKE A TWAT, AT WORST.
THEN MUCH OF THE ENERGY YOU HAVE PISSED AWAY ON FAKE OPINIONS WILL RETURN TO ‘YOU IN A RUSH’, AS YOUR WEAKNESS OF PRETENDING IS REPLACED WITH THE ‘REAL COMFORT OF NOT KNOWING’, AS NOW YOU ‘KNOW YOU DON’T KNOW’ CONSCIOUSLY, AND EVEN JUST ‘KNOWING THE TRUTH’ OF THAT WILL MAKE YOU MUCH, MUCH STRONGER IN THE MOMENT OF THAT REALIZATION.
Yes, what you don’t know in the moment of your choices is THAT YOUR COMFORTS AND LIES ARE ACTUALLY MAKING YOUR LIFE SHIT IN THE FIRST PLACE – YOUR COMFORTS WEAKEN YOU, SO MAKE ‘YOU MORE SHIT’, SO EVERYTHING YOU TOUCH ‘GOES TO SHIT’, ON PURPOSE, however unconsciously. See that is the thing of being a CHILD, YOU ARE FORCED TO LIVE YOUR LIFE UNCONSCIOUSLY ‘ON PURPOSE’ CAUSE YOU REALLY DON’T WANT THE TRUTH, YOU WANT a ‘SECRET FANTASY’ LIFE, BECAUSE IT IS BETTER THAN REAL LIFE – SO YOU BECOME SATISFIED WITH THE ‘WEAKNESS OF FANTASY’, it is enough for you because it is BETTER THAN REALITY, SO YOU CAN’T CHANGE…
But sure, I GET IT – WHY FACE REALITY WHEN YOU CAN BE A FECKLESS CHILD AND LIVE IN A FANTASY WORLD, FOREVER, EH, WHEN YOU CAN STAY ‘SAFE AND SOUND’ BEHIND THE BARS OF YOUR LITTLE ‘MENTAL COT’, FULL OF FLUFFY TOYS THAT ‘COMFORT YOU’ WHILST OBVIOUSLY BEING ‘LIES’, A FANTASY, UNREAL, LIKE YOUR IMAGINARY FRIENDS WHO HAVE YOUR BACK, WHO ‘LIKE YOU’ SO MAKE YOU ‘FEEL SAFE’, WHEN OBVIOUSLY NONE OF IT IS TRUE.
See NO child ever wants to grow up by themselves, IT’S IMPOSSIBLE BY THE DEFINITION OF WHAT IT IS, so you must be told, shown, forced even, BECAUSE YOU HAVE MADE BENG A CHILD ‘COMFORTABLE’, like a slave who has done a deal to fuck their repellant master for a slightly easier life than the other slaves, WHICH YOU CALL ‘CLEVER’, ‘POWERFUL’, ‘HAPPY’, INSTEAD OF USING THAT HUMILIATION TO KILL THE BASTARD AND ESCAPE TO ‘A LIFE WORTH LIVING’.
YES – TO STOP BEING A CHILD YOU NEED A ‘BETTER REALITY TO LOOK FORWARD TO’, A ‘BETTER YOU’ TO AIM AT, RATHER THAN A SHIT ONE YOU CAN DO NOTHING BUT RUN AWAY MENTALLY FROM. Then none of your childish shit will work anymore IN THE FACE OF THAT BETTER REALITY, and you will stop wanting to do it, given you can find the ENERGY TO MAKE THAT CHANGE OF COURSE. All you NEED ARE BETTER GOALS THAT YOU HAVE LEARNT HOW TO BRING INTO THE ‘MOMENT OF DECISION’, SO YOU CAN CHANGE TO ACHIEVE THOSE GOALS, BY PLANING BACK FROM THOSE GOALS AND REALIZING YOU NEED TO BE BOTH SOMEBODY ELSE IN ORDER TO ACHEIVE THEM, AND RUTHLESS ENOUGH TO MAKE THOSE CHANGES ‘HAPPEN’. This is REAL LIFE…
But AS A CHILD YOU HAVE NO CHOICE BUT TO ACCEPT your FAKE SHIT, ACCEPT ‘YOUR HUMILIATION AS NORMAL’, by ‘blanking it out’ – you accept your own self-deception, YOU LIE TO YOURSELF TO MAKE YOURSELF BEARABLE, AS IT MAKES ‘YOU FEEL HAPPY’, FEEL SANE, FEEL EVERYTHING IS OK FOR ANOTHER DAY. But what does it matter TO YOU eh, YOU HAVE MADE THAT CHOICE NOW, you have accepted your LACK of POWER in this world, IT IS WHO YOU ARE, YOUR WHOLE FAKE PERSONALITY, your good and your bad, your right and your ‘wrong’, so why even get out of bed every day, why not ‘sleep through it’ all, TO SLEEP PER CHANCE TO DREAM, eh (Sorry, Will…). This is what WEAKNESS ‘IS’ – TO FALL ASLEEP FOREVER, LIKE A FAIRY TALE CHARACTER, who has ‘PRICKED THEIR FINGER’ ON THE SPINNING ‘WHEEL OF TIME’…
So here is the one simple TRUTH that you have failed to understand YOUR WHOLE LIFE, told to YOU by US to replace the LIES FROM ‘THEM’ – see we actually are the BAD PEOPLE WHO HAVE COME TO RUIN YOUR WHOLE CHILDISH LIFE, SENT BY ‘YOUR GOD’ to BREAK ‘YOU THE CHILD’, whilst sadly recognizing that it actually ‘YOU WHO MUST BREAK YOU’ TODAY, as we have NO PERSONAL INTEREST IN YOU UNTIL YOU GROW THE FUCK UP. That’s just the WAY IT IS, THE WAY IT HAS ALWAYS BEEN, WAY IT WILL ALWAYS BE – TO GROW UP SOMETHING HAS TO ‘BREAK YOU THE CHILD’, YOU MUST SEE THE CON IN THE MOMENT…
So make a mental note of this TRUTH NOW – much as you won’t understand it, you will still need it later…
AS A CHILD YOU REJECTED THE FELT ‘RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOURSELF’ THAT MAKES YOU PERSONALLY POWERFUL.
INSTEAD, YOU ACCEPTED THE FALSE FREEDOM, THE EASE OF IRRESPONSIBILITY THAT MAKES YOU POWERLESS, ‘ANXIOUS’.
SO YOU HAVE MISTAKEN ‘WEAKNESS’ AS A ‘SENSE OF FREEDOM’, AND ‘STRENGTH’ AS THE ‘BURDEN OF RESPONSIBILITY’.
ITS ACTUALLY THE OTHER WAY ROUND, STRENGTH IS FREEDOM, BECAUSE BOTTLE BEATS ANXIETY EVERY TIME.
YET, EVEN NOW, READING THIS AND FEELING SHIT, YOU STILL BELIEVE WEAKNESS IS A GOOD THING, BECAUSE ITS SO EASY.
SEE THE REASON YOU BELIEVE THAT IS BECAUSE YOU HAVE ‘NO CHOICE’ AS A CHILD, AS YOU HAVE ‘NO BOTTLE’…
BUT YOU CAN CHANGE ALL OF THAT IN A HEARTBEAT BY ACCEPTING A DEEPLY FELT ‘RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOURSELF’.
So are you THE worthless, flakey, inconsistent, unstable, UNFAITHFUL, unreliable, 2 faced, lazy, drug addicted, ugly, smelly, sweaty, classless, tasteless, clueless ‘sack of shit’ that YOU TELL YOURSELF YOU ARE EVERYDAY, SIMPLY BY ACTING LIKE ONE AS ‘A CHILD’, or are you BETTER THAN THAT, is there still some QUALITY LEFT, something outside of your conscious self THAT IS WORTH ‘PROTECTING FROM YOU’. Mmmm, you don’t know do you… BUT YOU REALLY HOPE THERE IS, don’t you, otherwise you are simply everything you already HATE IN OTHERS, eh, and how fucking ICK is that, bitch..
TODAY, I’m going to help you with that DECISION, and that starts with this one simple realization – THE PROBLEM YOU HAVE RIGHT NOW IS YOUR LEVEL OF WEAKNESS – THE PROCESS OF GROWING UP in later life REQUIRES A LOT OF AVAILABLE EMOTIONAL ENERGY, OTHERWISE YOUR ‘ILLNESS OF IMMATURITY’ WILL ALWAYS BE BIGGER THAN YOUR ‘LOW ENERGY’ CONSCIOUSNESS, EXTENDING BEYOND THE BOUNDARIES OF YOU TINY CONSCIOUS MIND SO YOU CAN NOT SEE IT DISTINCTLY, AS A WHOLE, IN THE MOMENT OF IT CONTROLLING YOU.
See THIS IS WHY A CHILD has NO CHANCE, as every effort to change will simply fail ‘next day’, BUT YOU ALREADY KNOW THAT, DON’T YOU…
See, RIGHT NOW, your CHILDISH COMFORTS in all their many forms HOOVER UP all that SPARE ENERGY, and more, EVEN THE ENERGY YOU NEED TO FUNCTION, MOVE, THINK, SO THE ENERGETIC ‘KARMIC DEBT’ YOU OWE IS ALREADY HUGE for most, and it will take some time to fix that SHIT. So DON’T UNDERESTIMATE THIS ENERGETIC DEBT STUFF, WHATEVER YOU HAVE DONE TO YOURSELF THUS FAR – I DID A TRAD VERSION OF THIS PROCESS IN EARLY ADULTHOOD, I WAS HIGHLY MOTIVATED, HAD THE SPARE TIME AND KNEW A LOT, yet it still took me 18 MONTHS TO BREAK myself, and that included the USE of FORCED SHOCKS, which YOU DON’T WANT, as that takes BOTTLE…
THIS IS IMPORTANT TO BE CLEAR ABOUT – SPARE ENERGY MEANS YOU ARE CONSCIOUS OF IT EMOTIONALLY, it is not already assigned to your biology, to your compulsions, to your excitements, to your rage, TO YOUR SENSES/VISION – IT IS SPARE, SO YOU CAN DECIDE WHAT TO DO WITH IT BY ‘SITTING WITH IT’, TO MAKE YOU BIGGER CONSCIOUSLY, ENERGETICALLY. Therefore you must manage this process with that precise goal in mind, RESISTING THE DESIRE TO VENT THAT ENERGY ON NOTHIN. Much as I don’t expect you to master tantric sex, (the work of decades), IT IS REALLY USEFUL TO KNOW THAT THE EASIEST WAY TO DRAMATICALLY INCREASE YOUR ENERGY IS TO LIFT YOUR SEXUAL ENERGY UP, INDEED UP TO THE LEVEL OF YOUR ‘HEART’ IF POSSIBLE, much as more basic forms of BOTTLE WILL STILL GET IT DONE, but right now, as a feckless child, YOU WILL BE RUNNING ON EMPTY, INDEED YOU WILL MOST LIKELY BE RUNNING BELOW EMPTY, so YOUR energy work needs TO BE a VERY CLEAR FOCUS.
YEP, in the full knowledge that many of you will never commit to the YEARS IT WOULD TAKE FECKLESS LITTLE YOU TO REBUILD YOUR ‘ENERGETIC PRESENCE’ to anything even close to what you had as a child, I have found a better way, a way built on the whole concept of combining every bloody speed up I know, whilst keeping the dangers inherent in such speed ups to a comparatively low level – IT IS ALL BASED ON THE SIMPLE FACTS OF ELITISM, the core of the 4th Way:
IF YOU GIVE UP YOUR CHILDISH COMFORTS YOU WILL CHANGE YOUR LIFE VERY QUICKLY, BECAUSE YOU ‘HAVE TO’.
BUT YOU WANT TO ‘START’ DEVELOPING YOURSELF WHILST KEEPING YOUR COMFORTS, LIKE EVERYONE AS YOU ALL CAN’T COMMIT.
SO YOU MUST ‘CHANGE YOUR COMFORTS’ FROM ‘SELF-DESTRUCTION’ TO ‘ELITISM’, FROM WEAKNESS TO STRENGTH, FROM COWARDICE TO BOTTLE – THAT IS THE CORE OF THE LESSON TODAY, THE ‘MIDDLE WAY’, WHICH IS THE ONLY WAY FOR YOU.
Yet, for ALL that follows in this POST, it’s simple really – THE ‘BIG ISSUE’ WITH THIS LITTLE CHILDISH PLAN OF YOUR LIFE is that SADLY FOR MOST OF YOU READING THIS those childish BARS ON YOUR COT ceased to protect you decades ago, now they are JUST there to KEEP YOU IN. TO BE A CHILD AS AN ADULT IS TO LIVE IN A CAGE OF YOUR ‘EGO SAFETY’ – YOUR INSTINCTIVE REACTIONS TO YOUR CONTINUAL ANXIETY, A CAGE OF ‘EXISTENTIAL DREAD’ = LONG TERM FAILURE. YES, YOU ARE SECRETLY TERRIFIED OF LIFE BECAUSE YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND IT, AND HAVE NO ABILITY TO PROTECT YOURSELF, yet you do nothing about it, YOU SIMPLY ‘FIDDLE WHILE ROME BURNS’….
TO BE A CHILD IS TO ‘BE’ YOUR EGOIC DEFENSES, YOUR FEARS/DESIRES/BOREDOMS, YOUR COMFORTERS, YOUR FANTASIES, you can never SWITCH OFF THAT ‘MISSILE DEFENSE SYSTEM’, you can’t even ignore THE ‘WARNING MESSAGES’, YOU CAN’T stop it POWERING UP, EVEN AIMING BEFORE IT FIRES OFF some self-sabotaging ‘FALSE, instinctive, EMOTIONAL reaction’. Indeed, you think that is a GOOD THING, to have the automatic SHIELD AGAINST LIFE, TO BE ‘CLOSED OFF’ TO EVERYTHING OUTSIDE OF WHAT YOU KNOW YOU WANT/DON’T WANT ALREADY, so your SENSE OF ADVENTURE IS LONG GONE, you are full of gaping holes, leaks you need to close, ASAP.
SEE YOU THE CHILD HAS BECOME ‘ALL YOU HAVE’, BECAUSE YOU LIVE ‘IN-FEAR’ OF LOSS, OF LESS, OF PAIN as a child, so you don’t even decide to DO IT, TO BE IT, TO ACT IT OUT, IT IS INSTANTANEOUS, IT JUST HAPPENS, LIKE ‘BREATHING’, AND YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT IT IS DOING AND WHY IT IS DOING IT, yet every damn day you trust it with YOUR LIFE, because you THINK IT IS ‘NATURAL TO BE THIS WAY’, you have adapted so completely that you even think its ‘fun’.
SEE ALL OF THIS SHIT IS WHY ‘YOU DON’T WANT TO CHANGE’, HONEY BUNNY, you are not making a choice at all, YOU ARE NOT CAPABLE OF MAKING CHOICES AS A CHILD, UNLESS, of course, YOU ARE IN SOME WAY ‘FORCED TOO’ DO SOMETHING DIFFERENT BY FOLKS LIKE ME, that in some way you CAN’T ACTUALLY STAY WHERE YOU ARE ANYMORE. So your kinda have to DO SOMETHING then, for a change, SOMETHING OTHER THAN CRAVE THE MOMENTARY RELIEF OF YOUR ‘FUN’, whilst continuing to go round and round in ever decreasing circles on the same motherfucking spot.
SEE ADULTS LIKE ME ARE ‘MEAN TO YOU’, as we have no interest in ‘using you’ like a PARASITE for a cheap thrill, that is BENEATH US, but that is what A CHILD WANTS, because that is what they expect, SO IT COMFORTS THEM – WE ARE ONLY INTERESTED IN WHAT YOU ARE CAPABLE OF IF YOU DECIDE TO ‘CHANGE’. However much that process does actually FEEL LIKE ‘we are who GOD SENDS to BREAK YOU’, breaking down all the illusions you cling to, both today and for many days to come, its not really that, as TODAY ‘YOU’ MUST UNDERSTAND THAT ‘YOU’ NEED TO BREAK ‘YOU’, we are in fact honoring you with even this level of interest – TODAY OUR PRIMARY JOB IS ACTUALLY TO MAKE YOU SEE YOU ARE VERY ‘WRONG’, and illustrate that WITH CLEAR EXAMPLES YOU CAN FIX…
And this is how we start…
WE ALL EXIST IN A ‘CLASS SYSTEM’, A SYSTEM OF LEVELS OF ‘BETTER THAN’ – THAT IS HOW BOTH THE NATURAL AND SUPERNATURAL WORLD WORKS.
THE BOTTOM RUN OF THAT CLASS SYSTEM IS TO BE AN ADULT, EVEN AS AN ANIMAL, SO YOU HAVE THE ABILITY TO CHANGE = YOU CAN DEVELOP.
BUT AS A WEAK CHILD YOU DON’T EXIST, YOU ARE INVISIBLE, INSIGNIFICANT, BECAUSE THERE IS NOTHING ‘SUBSTANTIAL IN YOU’ TO HELP.
PLEASE TRY AND GET THIS CLEARLY SO YOU FEEL IT – AS A CHILD YOU HAVE ALREADY ‘FAILED LIFE’, YOU HAVE ‘BOTTLED IT’, ITS OVER.
TODAY YOU MUST UNDERSTAND WHY THAT IS CONCEPTUALLY, SO YOU CAN CHANGE IT PRACTICALLY AND VERY QUICKLY…
SEE ‘YOU MUST HELP YOU’, BEFORE WE CAN HELP ‘YOU’, BECAUSE RIGHT NOW ‘THERE IS NO YOU’ TO HELP, BITCH…
AND THE BEST OF THOSE ‘FAILURE EXAMPLES’ AT THE START IS THIS – you THINK BEING AN INSTINCTIVE CHILD IS WAY MORE NATURAL, AUTHENTIC AND FUN than your REAL LIFE, don’t you, cause your REAL ‘LIFE IS SLAVERY’, so YOU don’t have a ‘scoobie-bloody-do’ want actual FUN is BECAUSE YOU JUDGE IT AGAINST THE WRONG METRIC – THE FUN OF A CHILD IS NOT ‘PLEASURE’, IT IS SIMPLY TO LESSEN ‘THE PRESSURE OF ANXIETY’. THAT IS THE MEASURE YOU USE FOR FUN, ’cause you are JUST A KID, a performing monkey in a zoo, lying to themselves in order to stay sane BECAUSE YOUR CHARACTER, ALL YOUR PETTY LIKES AND DISLIKES IS JUST A SET OF DEFENSIVE REACTIONS/COMFORTERS THAT WAS NEVER MUCH GOOD IN THE FIRST PLACE…
YEP, SORRY ‘N ALL THAT, BUT YOU THINK FUN IS ‘PLAYING IN THE MUD’ LIKE A CHILD TO ‘DISTRACT YOURSELF’, but REAL FUN ONLY EXISTS ON ‘THE OTHERSIDE’ of that stupidity, see REAL FUN IS ‘ADVENTURE’, it’s ABOUT THE ‘USE OF POWER’ TO ‘OVERCOME CHALLENGES’ WHEN YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT IS ‘GOING TO HAPPEN’ NEXT, BUT YOU ARE CONFIDENT YOU CAN COPE, WHATEVER FUCKING HAPPENS. Then you will discover that your current FUN is just a slightly less boring type of BOREDOM, indeed you are actually in the process of BORING YOURSELF TO DEATH – it is the main source of your ANXIETY…
Yes, however much some of you may have already discovered the SPONTANEOUS NATURE OF REAL FUN, at least in the animal sense of it, DISCOVERED THAT ACTUAL PLEASURE IN ACTION ONLY REALLY COMES FROM THE EXPRESSION OF POWER IN THE MOMENT, you STILL don’t really know what it means, do you – YOU CHASE FUN, COMFORT THAT IS NOT ACTUALLY PLEASURABLE, YOU DO IT SIMPLY TO FEEL ‘A BIT BETTER’, WHICH IS ANOTHER WAY OF SAYING LESS SHIT, LESS POWERLESS, LESS USELESS, LESS CONFUSED, LESS SILLY, SAD AND STUPID, LESS BROKEN, LOST AND ALONE, LESS SICK, FAT AND UGLY. You are wearing tight shoes for the relief of taking them off, and there is no pleasure in that…
SO BE CLEAR RIGHT NOW LITTLE BOYS AND GIRLS – YOUR TREASURED COMFORTS ARE ‘DOG SHIT’ – TO ‘FEEL SLIGHTLY LESS POWERLESS’ FOR A FEW MOMENTS IS NOT THE SAME AS ‘FEELING POWERFUL’, FEELING IN CONTROL, FEELING MIGHTY, FEELING CONSEQUENTIAL. INDEED CLINGING ON TO YOUR COMFORT BLANKET OF TRIVIAL FUN IS THE EXACT BLOODY OPPOSITE OF WHAT YOU SHOULD BE DOING, IF YOU WANT THE ACTUAL PLEASURE THAT EXISTS AS ‘A THING IN ITSELF’, AND IS COMPLETELY SEPARATE TO THE PAINFULLY POWERLESS POVERTY OF YOUR RELATIVE STATE OF MIND!
KNOW IT IS ONLY WHEN ‘YOU’ HAVE CHANGED YOUR MIND THAT ‘YOU’ CAN DECIDE TO CHANGE HOW ‘YOU’ FEEL ‘ABOUT’ YOURSELF AND ‘IN’ YOURSELF, ALL THE TIME. BUT THAT IS ONLY POSSIBLE WHEN YOU’RE BETTER THAN THE FUCKED UP LITTLE MESS YOU ARE NOW, BETTER THAN YOUR ‘EXCUSES’, because BEING STUCK IN A CHILDLIKE STATE OF MIND AS AN ADULT IS UN-NATURAL, IT IS AN ILLNESS – TODAY YOU MUST SEE THIS CLEARLY.
SEE YOU ARE A BABY IN A PRAM, YOU ARE A MONKEY IN A CAGE, A MONKEY WHO, WHEN OFFERED THE CHOICE BETWEEN A BOX OF BANANAS OR THAT SAME BOX FULL OF GOLD ALWAYS CHOOSES THE BANANAS, CAUSE YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT GOLD IS, WHAT IT FOR, HOW MUCH MORE VALUABLE IT IS BECAUSE YOU CAN ONLY THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU ALREADY KNOW, AND WHAT WILL GIVE YOU THE MOST RELIEF AND THE LEAST FEAR, IN THE MOMENT OF YOUR TINY LITTLE ATTENTION SPAN.
SO A CHILD CANNOT GROW, CANNOT GO AGAINST ITSELF, ITS EGO SAFETY, AS CHILD HAS TO BE FORCED TO GROW, TO BE TORN AWAY FROM THE COMFORTS OF ITS ‘MUMMIES TIT’ BEFORE IT DISCOVERS THAT IT ACTUALLY HAD TO GROW TO SURVIVE. EVEN WORSE A CHILD HAS TO THINK, THINK AND THEN THINK SOME MORE IN ORDER TO EXIST, SO IT TORTURES ITSELF BY PAYING ATTENTION TO WHATEVER APPEARS IN ITS HEAD, AS IF THAT HAS SOME SORT OF REALITY, BUT THAT SHIT IS JUST HISTORIC REACTIONS TRIGGERED BY THE RANDOMNESS OF WHATEVER PASSES BY, SO YOU HAVE NO CONSTANT SENSE OF YOURSELF, LIKE AN ADULT, ‘YOU ARE YOUR REACTIONS TO YOUR ENVIRONMENT’, WHICH YOU ACCEPT TOTALLY, LIKE A DORK…
SO TODAY, NOW, YOU MUST ACCEPT THAT IT IS ACCEPTABLE TO CHANGE YOUR PERSONALITY BECAUSE IT IS NECESSARY.
SEE YOU ARE STUCK HOLDING ON TO YOUR CHILDHOOD, BUT IT WAS JUST A ‘PASSING PHASE, A ‘HOLDING ACTION’.
SO NOW YOU NEED TO GROW UP, YOU NEED TO ‘GIVE UP’ ON YOUR CHILDISH ‘INFERIORITY’ AS A STATE OF MIND.
YOU NEED TO CREATE A ‘NEW’ SENSE OF WHO YOU WISH TO BE, AS WITHOUT THAT YOU ARE ‘NOTHING’…
BUT YOU CAN’T THINK THAT UP YOURSELF, YOU MUST ACCEPT AND DEVELOP ‘TO A SET STANDARD’.
AND FOR GIFTED THIS NEW ‘SENSE OF YOURSELF’ IS OF ‘BEING BETTER THAN’ THE KIDS…
YES – MOST IMPORTANT OF ALL – KNOW if you NEVER GET HELP TO FIX THIS then you will NEVER GROW UP, SO YOU WILL NEVER BE ABLE TO DEVELOP YOURSELF. However hard it is later in life, it is NEVER TO LATE TO ‘WANT TO’ GROW UP, BUT YOU CAN NEVER GROW UP ‘BY YOURSELF’, VIA YOUR ‘MOOD OF EGO SAFETY’, AS YOU DON’T KNOW ANY OTHER WAY, you literally stumble around in the DARKNESS OF ANXIETY AS A CHILD, because you are POWERLESS.
SEE IF YOU NEVER GROW UP, NEVER DEVELOP THAT CONSTANT INTERNAL SENSE OF YOURSELF, COMPLETELY SEPARATE TO YOUR EVER CHANGING EXTERNAL REALITY, then YOUR CONSCIOUS SELF, YOUR ‘I’ THAT SEES WILL NEVER SEPARATE FROM YOUR THOUGHTS OF THE MOMENT, SO THEY WILL ALWAYS COMPELL YOU, BE YOU, CONTROL YOU. THOSE REACTIONS WILL DOMINATE THE REST OF YOUR LIFE, CREATING SUFFERING AS EMOTION IN ORDER TO PUSH YOU AROUND, INSTEAD OF SIMPLY AMUSING YOU, AS YOU CONSTANTLY REMEMBER THE POINT, THE GOAL OF WHAT YOU HAVE DECIDED TO DO COME WHAT MAY, ‘AGAINST THEM’, so can clearly see in the moment if this or that EGOIC REACTION IS USEFUL OR USELESS…
Yep, the COMPULSION TO FOLLOW YOUR EGOIC COMFORTS of A CHILD, THE ‘COMFORTS OF RELIEF’ has become a form of PRISON YOU LIVE IN, and you can never escape by yourself – YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT ELSE TO DO, simply because you ‘DON’T WANT TO DO ANYTHNG’ ELSE – YOU ARE ‘TRAPPED’ IN CHILDISH COMFORT, ‘YOUR FUN’. YOU HAVE MADE IT ‘WORK FOR YOU’, BY WHATEVER REPETITIVE, CREEPY, SECRETIVE LITTLE EXTREMES YOU HAVE TO GO TO IN ORDER GET RELIEF FROM YOUR ‘REAL LIFE’ – BELEIVE IT OR NOT, BUT YOU HAVE UNCONSCIOUSLY CREATED A SHIT REAL LIFE ON PURPOSE, AS WITHOUT IT NONE OF YOUR ‘FUN’ WOULD BE FUN ANYMORE, it would be the same load of BORING, TRIVIAL BOLLOCKS THAT THE REST OF ‘US’ SEE…
See… HAVE YOU NEVER NOTICED HOW MUCH ‘YOUR FUN’, YOUR FANTASIES ‘WEAR OFF’ LIKE A CATCHY BUT OTHERWISE FORMULAIC LITTLE ‘POP SONG’, THAT THE SAME THING DONE OVER AND OVER BECOMES ‘LESS FUN’, AND LATER ‘NO FUN’, AND LATER STILL YOU LEARN TO FECKING LOATHE IT? It’s because YOUR FUN IS NOT ACTUALLY PLEASUREABLE IN THE ADULT SENSE OF THE WORD, IT IS SIMPLY VARIOUS FORMS OF ‘DISTRACTION FROM ANXIETY VIA EMOTION’, VIA TEMPORARY ‘RELIEF FROM SUFFERING’, EVEN IF THAT SUFFERING IS SIMPLY THE FORCED MENTAL CRAVING FOR THAT SAME LITTLE FUN, A ‘FAKE SUFFERING’ SENT BY SOMETHING TO CONTROL YOU…
WHAT-A-SHOCKER, eh, when you look into how Self Destruction works, WHEN see your whole miserable little existence is now based on ‘TRYING TO FEEL POWERFUL IN THE MOMENT OF YOUR POWERLESSNESS’, EG LESS POWERLESS, FOR A SECOND OR TWO as a TYPE OF ‘FORCED RELIEF FROM SUFFERING’, which overall makes you FEEL EVEN MORE POWERLESS AS IT ‘WEAKENS YOU’. Its actually a slow, nasty little form of SUICIDE – more you CHASE COMFORT THE WEAKER YOU FEEL AFTERWARDS, so YOU are even more COMPELLED TO CHASE MORE EXTREME FORMS OF COMFORT MORE OFTEN, so you get EVEN WEAKER. On and on it goes, but you STILL call THAT SHIT FUN…
Get it – TAKEN TO EXTREMES this is what A DRUG ADDICT ‘IS’, AS IN ‘THE END’ OBLIVION IS ALL THAT IS LEFT, ALL THAT IS ‘BEARABLE’. Frankly for SOME of you its ONLY YOUR FEAR OF PERSONAL SCORN, SOCIAL EXCLUSION AND PHYSICAL DECLINE THAT STOPS YOU INJECTING HEROIN – THE CONSTANT HUMILIATION OF YOU SECRET DAMNATION HAS ALREADY BURNT MUCH OF YOUR FAMOUS RESILIANCE TO ASHES, SO YOUR ‘MENTAL HEALTH ISSUES’ ARE VERY PUBLIC NOW. You ‘fray at the edges’ very easily, don’t you, any old tedious drama will just set you off like a cheap firework…
SO TRY AND SEE THIS NOW BEFORE WE START TODAY – YOUR FUN IS A CON FOR CHILDREN, A PERVERTED FORM OF THE GENUINE, NATURAL AND NECESSARY TRAINING OF BABY ANIMALS THAT YOU HAVE TWISTED AND GOT STUCK IN – YOU NEVER HAD TO MOVE ON WHEN ‘YOU LEFT THE NEST’, LIKE WILD ANIMALS HAVE TO. SO NOW YOUR NEED FOR ‘PLAYTIME’ DOMINATES YOUR ‘ADULT LIFE’ which you live LIKE A CHILD – IN A VERY REAL SENSE YOU ARE STUCK IN A ‘MENTAL TRAINING SIMULATION’, BELIEVING REALITY ‘IS’ THAT SIMULATION, SO THINKING, FEELING AND ACTING LIKE A DELUDED FOOL.
SEE ALL ANIMALS KNOW THEY ‘HAVE TO GROW UP’, THAT BEING A CHILD IS TO LIVE IN A FAKE, UNREAL, PROTECTED WORLD THAT DOES NOT ACTUALLY EXIST OUTSIDE OF YOUR HEAD – ANIMALS KNOW THEY MUST GROW UP TO SURVIVE, TO HAVE REAL FUN, TO FEND FOR THEMSELVES. THEY KNOW THEY MUST STOP PLAY FIGHTING AND GET TO ACTUALLY FIGHTING, TO DEALING WITH ‘CONFLICT OVER RESOURCES’. SO THEY DEVELOP THE SENSE OF ‘PERSONAL POWER’ THEY NEED TO ‘COMPETE EFFECTIVELY’, OTHERWISE THEY ARE ALREADY AS GOOD AS DEAD…
YOU ROB YOURSELF OF 9/10 OF WHO YOU ACTUALLY ARE AS A CHILDISH ANIMAL, A PUPPY, WHAT YOU CAN DO IS LIMITED TO YOUR ‘CULTURAL NORMS’, THE AVERAGE OF YOUR LITTLE ‘HERD’, BUT THAT LOSS IS A HUGE 99% OF WHO YOU ARE, SHOULD YOU BE GIFTED – ‘YOUR REALITY’ IS HIDDEN FROM YOU. SO YOU HAVE NO CHANCE – EVERYTHING YOU TRY TO DO ENDS UP AS THE OPPOSITE OF WHAT YOU REALLY WANT, AND YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW ‘WHY’, OR ‘HOW’, THAT IS WHAT ‘DELUDED’ MEANS, YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT IS ACTUALLY HAPPENING IN ‘REALTIME’ AS A ‘BIG PICTURE’, SO YOU WILLING ACT AGAINST YOUR BEST INTERESTS, OFTEN SIMPLY BECAUSE YOU THINK IT IS ‘COOL’ = CONTINUAL SELF-SABOTAGE AS A ‘LIFESTYLE CHOICE’.
THERE HAS ALWAYS BEEN A BETTER WAY OF COURSE, PERFECTED MULTIPLE TIMES IN MULTIPLE EPOCHS, WAYS THAT SHOW YOU THAT ADULT FUN DOES NOT DECLINE, IT BUILDS AND BUILDS THE MORE YOU DO IT, BECOMES PART OF WHO YOU ARE, STRENGTHENS YOU, AND AFTER A WHILE THE SENSE OF PLEASURE NEVER ACTUALLY LEAVES YOU. But a child PLAYS AT EVERYTHING AND COMMITS TO NOTHING, A CHILD BELIEVES NOTHING REALLY MATTERS ‘TO THEM’ AS OTHERS WILL LOOK AFTER WHAT ‘MATTERS’ FOR THEM, SO NOTHING STICKS – A CHILD TAKES THE MOST IMPORTANT LIFE CHANGING CHANCES AT THE SAME LEVEL AS WASHING THEIR ‘FACE’, AND SO FUCKS UP CONSTANTLY WITH LITTLE CARE, OR CONCERN.
MAKE NO MISTAKE – IN NATURE A CHILD ‘HAS TO CHANGE’ TO SURVIVE IN THE WILD, AS THAT CHANGE INVOLVES EATING TODAY, IT HAS TO BECOME ITSELF IN ORDER TO REALIZE THE POTENTIAL GIFTED IT BY ITS ANCESTORS. BUT YOU DON’T, AS ‘YOUR LAW’ IS CORRUPT – THE VALUES YOU SHOULD LIVE BY ARE JUST TODAYS VERSION OF ‘A FAILED SLAVE SOCIETY’, THAT WANTS YOU TO STAY A CHILD, BE PRODUCTIVE, to CONSUME, AND PREFERABLY DIE QUIETLY JUST AFTER YOU RETIRE. BUT NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU UNDERSTAND THESE ‘FACTS OF LIFE’ FOR A MOMENT, YOU WON’T CHANGE, WILL YOU – THE WHOLE CONCEPT OF NOT BEING WHO YOU WERE YESTERDAY, OF DECIDING TO BE DIFFERENT TODAY IS TOTALLY ‘BEYOND CHILDISH YOU’…
SEE YOU CAN’T GROW UP, CAN YOU, as ‘YOU’ ONLY KNOW WHAT ‘YOU NEED’, RIGHT NOW TO FEEL BETTER AGAINST YOUR ‘ILLNESS’ – YOU HATE EVEN THE MENTION OF THE PHRASE ‘GET A GRIP, PULL YOUR SHIT TOGETHER AND GROW UP’, because it ‘SHAMES YOU’, reminds you of all your failure, incompetence and laziness, like a little kid. SO YOU HAVE TO ‘BLANK IT OUT’, swap it with some formulaic fantasy that ‘overpowers reality’, as that is the point of your fantasies, fool, and they are OFTEN STRONGEST IN THE MOMENT TO DISTRACT YOU FROM SOMETHING ELSE YOU REALLY SHOULD BE DOING INSTEAD, RIGHT NOW…
Yet, if I said ‘Everything that kills me makes me feel alive’ (Sorry, One Republic) YOU WOULD GET A BONER, it would EXCITE YOU, because you ‘CHASE YOU OWN SELF DESTRUCTION’ as a CHILD, however unconsciously, yet strangely you can never SEE the ‘PROCESS OF DEATH’ in that same moment, the uncontrollable dread, pain and terror of actually dying, all the screaming and blood at the moment of death, WHICH IS A PITY, AS THAT SHIT CHANGES YOU QUICKER THAN ANYTHING ELSE ON THIS EARTH…
BUT YOU HAVE PROBABLY NEVER EVEN SEEN A DEAD BODY UP CLOSE IN REALITY HAVE YOU, LET ALONE SOMEONE YOU KNOW, LET ALONE ACTUALLY WATCHED THEM DIE A VIOLENT, UNEXPECTED DEATH – YOU THINK SELF-DESTRUCTION IS ‘SEXY’ SIMPLY BECAUSE YOU HAVE NO IDEA ‘WHAT DYING LOOKS LIKE’ – to You there is NO RISK of DEATH, as you would not even have the GUTS FOR THAT. See, you cannot even ‘imagine dying’ can you, YOU DON’T SEE YOURSELF DYING A LITTLE MORE EVERY DAMN DAY, even the ‘big chunks of dying’ that happen AFTER YOUR CHEAP LITTLE THRILLS… well, until its too late of course, until even you notice you LOOK, SOUND AND SMELL LIKE A WALKING CORPSE…
VERY SADLY TODAY, unlike the ancient Mystery Schools, the source of all our modern-day ‘Religion’, we can not use your ‘fear of THE PROCESS of dying’ TO GROW YOU UP ‘FAST’, ‘IN THE MOMENT OF YOUR TERROR’, AS YOU SIMPLY DON’T HAVE IT AS A MODERN, WESTERN CHILD, it has been concealed from you BY YOUR SOCIETY, and, frankly, there are actual laws that stop us doing that TO YOU. No… we must find another way TO GROW YOUR STUPID ASS UP, THAT ‘YOU CAN DO TO YOU’, ALL SAFE AND SOUND AT ‘HOME’, that even you the CHILDISH PUSSY can wrap your little head around, AND FIND THE EMOTIONAL ENERGY YOU NEED TO DO IT, TO PUSH THROUGH AND PAST YOUR RESISTANCE TO IT.
SO BURN THIS INTO YOUR MIND –
TO BE A CHILD IS TO BE WEAK, ‘POWERLESS’, WHICH FEELS ‘ANXIOUS’ TO YOU.
‘ANXIOUS’ CAN ONLY REACT, SO IT FOLLOWS ITS ROUTINES, SO ITS SLOW, CONFUSED, BLIND, SCARED, CREEPY AND ‘MENDACIOUS’.
A CHILD CANNOT ‘DECIDE TO DO ANYTHING’, EVERYTHING IS SIMPLE ‘EXTERNAL CAUSE AND EFFECT’, SO IS RANDOM CHAOS.
EVERYTHING YOU ‘THINK YOU DO’ IS A CONSCIOUS REACTION TO PATTERNS OF BANAL LITTLE TRIGGERS STORED UP IN YOUR UNCONSCIOUS OVER THE DECADES OF BEING A FECKLESS LITTLE CHILD = WHAT THEY CALL ‘COMPLEXES’.
THESE COMPLEXES ARE ‘NOT YOU’, BECAUSE YOU ARE NOT CONSCIOUS OF THEM AS A CHILD, SO THEY CONTROL YOU WITH EASE, AND ‘YOU THE CHILD’ ARE FORCED TO BUILD ‘A CHARACTER’ OUT OF THEM, TO MAKE THEM NORMAL.
BUT THOSE COMPLEXES ARE NOT A CHARACTER, THERE IS NO CONSCIOUS CHOICE, SO YOU THE CHILD HAVE ‘THE CHARACTER OF NO CHARACTER’, OF SIMPLE PATTERN REACTIONS, A SET OF AUTO DEFENSIVE ACTIONS YOU HAVE LONG FORGOTTEN THE POINT OF.
SO YOU ARE CONTROLLED, LITTLE MORE THAN A ‘FUCK PUPPET’, WHO IS FUCKED BY LIFE EVERY MOMENT, HUMILIATED AND TORTURED FOR FUN OF OTHERS, BECAUSE YOU ARE A CHILD – YOU ARE WEAK AND STUPID, BUT YOU THINK ITS ‘COOL’.
MAKE NO MISTAKE – BEING AN ADULT IS ABOUT POWER – THE FEELING AND THE USE OF ‘PERSONAL POWER’ WHICH REPLACES THE ‘ANXIETY OF A CHILD’, WHICH ALLOWS AN ADULT TO ACT FROM A PLACE OF ‘BEING AT PEACE’, OF ‘OPENESS TO LIFE’.
SO BEST FACE IT NOW – TO BE A CHILD IS TO BE ‘UNSTABLE’, A GUTLESS BITCH AS ‘A CONSTANT STATE OF MIND’ WHICH YOU ARE FOREVER TRYING TO ESCAPE FOR A MOMENT, THAT IS YOUR ‘LIFE GOAL’, SUCH AS ‘YOUR LIFE OF NO LIFE’ IS, EG OF NO ADVENTURE OR CHANGE IS. YOU HAVE ‘NO POINT’, NO REASON TO EXIST OTHER THAN THAT BANAL CYCLE, WHICH IS WHY SO MANY OF YOU KILL YOURSELVES OR TURN TO DRUGS WHEN IT BECOMES TOO UNBEARABLE.
YES – YOU LIVE ‘IN FEAR’ DON’T YOU, YOUR LIFE IS A QUEST TO MAKE BEING A ‘CHILD BEARABLE’ TODAY…
YOU LIVE IN YOUR ‘INFERIORITY COMPLEX’, SO EVERY REACTION YOU HAVE IS DEFENSIVE, SO YOU CAN’T BE ANY DIFFERENT – IN ORDER TO GROW, CHANGE, ‘YOU’ HAVE TO ‘LOSE’, AND YOU CAN NEVER FACE THAT TRUTH, CAN YOU…
YOU WEAR YOU EGO LIKE A SUIT OF ARMOUR, LIKE A MISSLE DEFENSE SYSTEM, ALWAYS DRIVEN BY THE NEED TO DEFEND ITSELF, TO ‘REACT TO THREATS’, BUT AN ADULT DOES NOT NEED TO BE ‘EN-GUARD’, AN ADULT CAN DEAL WITH WHATEVER HAPPENS.
BUT YOU ARE JUST ONE MORE TEDIOUS LITTLE ‘CHAIN STORE’ KID, AMONGST BILLIONS JUST LIKE YOU – ‘NOTHING’ FOREVER…
WHAT A TEDIOUS LITTLE DESPERATE SHIT SHOW YOU ARE, EH, YET YOU STILL THINK YOU ARE FINE…
SO HERE IS THE ‘KEY BIT’ – THE ONE ASPECT OF BEING A CHILD YOU NEED TO GRASP NOW, THE ONE SIMPLE MECHANISM YOU LACK AS A CHILD – THE KEY REASON THAT ‘NOTHING/EVERYTHING IS YOUR FAULT’, THE REASON ‘YOU DON’T CARE’ ABOUT YOURSELF IN ESSENCE, AS A ‘THING IN ITSELF’, IS BECAUSE YOU ARE NOT CAPABLE OF IT – YOU HAVE NO SENSE OF YOURSELF, OF ‘WHO YOU ARE’, THE ‘WEIGHT OF RESPONSIBILITY TO YOURSELF AS IMPORTANT’ IN SOMEWAY IS SIMPLY MISSING IN ACTION, AS YOU NEVER BOTHERED TO DEVELOP ONE, everything you THINK YOU ARE IS AN EXTERNAL REACTION…
YOU SIMPLY DON’T FEEL ‘BETTER THAN’ ANYONE ELSE DO YOU, that entire, and most fundamental part of BOTH the NATURAL AND SUPERNATURAL WORLD IS COMPLETELY MISSING FROM YOUR ‘EXPERIENCE OF LIFE’. YOU DON’T FEEL ANYTHING ‘all the time’, DO YOU, its all a passing phase, and if was not for the most basic, MOST RELATIVE, SUBJECTIVE AND TRANSITORY symbols of ANIMAL POWER, (MONEY, LOOKS, SMARTS, SOCIAL STATUS, POWER OVER OTHERS, STUFF, PROPERTY, CONNECTIONS), you would have no TEMPORARY SENSE OF ‘FEELING BETTER THAN OTHERS’ AT ALL, even briefly, for a moment.
So the most fundamental mechanism on this planet, the one that drives all progress, the MAGICAL PROCESS of EVOLUTION IS DENIED YOU, so all you can do is DEVOLVE, DEGENERATE, AND DESTROY YOURSELF. See sadly those are the only 2 approaches you can take to this life IN TERMS OF AN OVERARCHING GOAL AS AN ANIMAL, THE ONE THING THAT DEFINES EVERYTHING YOU DO AS THAT GOAL BECOMES THE ROOT OF YOUR CHARACTER – TO CHASE ‘DEGENERATE COMFORT’ OR ‘EVOLUTIONARY CHALLENGE’…
YOU FEEL NO ‘WEIGHT OF RESPONSIBILITY of YOUR IMPORTANCE, YOUR PLACE IN THIS WORLD’ AS A CHILD.
SEE IT IS THE CONSTANT FELT WEIGHT INSIDE YOURSELF THAT REMINDS AN ADULT THAT YOU ARE ‘NOT THIS MOMENT’, THAT YOU HAVE A GREATER POINT/PURPOSE THAN IT, AND SO CAN OVERCOME THE URGES OF THIS MOMENT.
MANY CULTURES BOTH ANCIENT AND MODERN HAVE INVENTED THIS RESPONSIBILITY IN ORDER TO GROW UP ITS KIDS, WITH ‘FAMILIAR DUTY’ AND ‘ANCESTOR VENERATION’ BEING PARTICULARLY EFFECTIVE, AS THEY LEAD TO SPIRITUALITY.
OUTSIDE OF THE VERY TOP OF OUR SOCIETY ITS ALL LONG GONE IN THE WEST OF COURSE, BUT MY PERSONAL FAVORITE OF THESE IS ‘GIRI’ – TO CARRY ‘THE EMOTIONAL BURDEN OF EXTERNAL OBLIGATION’ FOR ITS OWN SAKE, AS IT ‘IMPROVES YOU’, BY ITSELF.
BE CLEAR – IT IS NOT THE SPECIFIC OBLIGATION OR DUTY ITSELF THAT MATTERS, IT IS THAT YOU ARE FORCED TO TRAIN YOURSELF THAT ‘DUTY’ IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN WHAT YOU THE CHILD WANTS, SO CAN BE USED ON ANY OTHER HIGHER PURPOSE…
BUT YOU HAVE BEEN TAUGHT SINCE BIRTH THAT OTHERS DEFINE YOU, TELL YOU WHAT TO DO, WHO YOU ARE, SO YOU NEVER NEEDED TO BE ‘RESPONSIBLE FOR YOURSELF’, OTHERS WITH POWER OVER YOU DID THAT, SO YOU HAD TO TRUST THEM…
AND YOU THINK THIS RELIANCE ON OTHERS MAKES YOU ‘FREE’, HAPPY, POWERFUL, BECAUSE YOU ARE NOT RESPONSIBLE – IT CREATES THE ILLUSION OF ITS OPPOSITE IN YOUR HEAD, THAT IS WHY YOU THINK RESPONSIBILITY IS WEAK, BUT YOU ARE STRONG.
SEE ‘YOU HAVE NEVER CHANGED THAT MINDSET’, SO YOU DON’T ‘OWN YOURSELF’, YOU ARE NOT ‘IMPORTANT’, SPECIAL, IF YOU WAIT LONG ENOUGH OTHERS WILL STILL TELL YOU WHAT TO DO, PROTECT YOU, USE YOU, MAKE YOU ‘FEEL SAFE’, AS A CHILD.
THAT LACK OF OWNERSHIP, THAT LACK OF SELF ‘CARE’ OR ‘URGENCY’ THAT ONLY COMES FROM BEING RESPONSIBLE FOR YOURSELF OR OTHERS, DAMNS YOU TO NOTHINGNESS AS YOU HAVE ‘NO SENSE OF YOURSELF’ – YOU ARE NOT CAPABLE OF HIGHER VALUES.
BUT A SENSE OF YOURSELF ONLY WORKS AS A ‘POSITIVE JUDGEMENT’ OF ‘BETTER THAN’ BECAUSE ‘YOU ARE SPECIAL’, THAT IS THE REASON CLASS SYSTEMS BASED ON FEELING ‘BETTER THAN’ HAVE BEEN USED FOR THOUSANDS OF YEARS TO GROW KIDS UP.
BE CLEAR – YOU MUST HAVE A SENSE OF RESPONSIBILITY OF WHAT IS MORE IMPORTANT IN ORDER TO GROW UP, AND LIVE A LIFE WORTH LIVING – YOU MUST HAVE ‘A POSITIVE SENSE OF YOURSELF’ THAT ‘YOU WISH TO PROTECT’ AS AN ANIMAL.
RIGHT NOW YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW WHAT THAT FUCKING MEANS, SO YOU MUST THINK ABOUT THE MORE BASIC VERSION – YOUR EXTERNAL ‘REPUTATION’, HOW FOLKS TREAT YOU, AS THAT IS THE BASIC FUNCTIONAL ‘LEVEL OF PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY’.
IT IS VERY USEFUL TO PRACTICE THIS REPUTATION STUFF BY HAVING RESPECT FOR YOURSELF IN THE MOMENT, SO YOU LEARN TO CONTROL YOURSELF, HOW ‘YOU LOOK’ IN YOUR MORE CRUCIAL INTERACTIONS INSTEAD OF BEING YOUR NORMAL TOXIC ‘NATURAL’.
SO KNOW THAT A CHILDS GREATEST WEAKNESS IS THEIR UNCONTROLLED FACIAL EXPRESSIONS THAT GIVE AWAY THEIR THOUGHTS AND SO THEY HAVE NO SECRETS, BUT ‘THEY DON’T UNDERSTAND’ WHY THEIR INTERACTIONS WITH OTHERS GO BADLY.
THIS PRACTICE OF SELF-RESPECT IS PARTICULARLY EFFECTIVE AT THE START IF YOU CAN IMAGINE HOW YOUR FACE LOOKS IN THESE INTERACTIONS AND CHANGE IT TO SUIT YOUR GOAL IN THE MOMENT THAT YOU HAVE WORKED OUT BEFORE YOU STARTED THAT INTERACTION, AS THAT TYPE OF SELF-CONSCIOUSNESS HAS COLOSSAL KNOCK BENEFITS.
BUT MUCH AS ALL THIS WILL HELP ‘FIND’ YOUR SENSE OF DUTY, IT IS NOT ENOUGH TO GROW UP, AS YOU THE CHILD WILL ALWAYS BE STRONGER EMOTIONALLY THAN YOUR DESIRE TO GROW UP IS MENTALLY – YOU ARE TOO WEAK TO ‘FORCE YOURSELF’.
SO TODAY WE GET YOU TO DEVELOP A ‘SENSE OF DUTY’ TOWARDS DEVELOPING ‘A CONSTANT FELT WEIGHT OF RESPONSIBILITY’ TOWARD YOURSELF AS A HABIT BECAUSE IT FEELS ‘BETTER THAN’ = BOTTLE = PERSONAL POWER.
THIS PRACTICE IS HOW YOU GO FROM A FECKLESS CHILD, ONE MORE ‘SUICIDE BLONDE’, TO DEVELOPING A SENSE OF YOURSELF AS ‘BETTER THAN THAT’, TO DEVELOP THE SENSE THAT ACTS AS A REFERENCE POINT FOR EVERYTHING ELSE IN THE MOMENT.
SO KNOW FOR CERTAIN – WITHOUT THIS SENSE YOU ARE POND LIFE, STREET TRASH, A COKE WHORE, AS ANYONE CAN GET YOU DO ANYTHING THROUGH THE SIMPLE MANIPULATION OF YOUR OBVIOUS COMPLEXES – YOU ARE BETTER OFF DEAD.
BUT KNOW THE TRICKY BIT IS SIMPLY THIS – RIGHT NOW, FOR THIS POST, FOR YOUR LITTLE LIFE, IT IS ‘YOU THE FECKLESS CHILD’ I’M TALKING TOO, SO IT IS THAT CHILD WHICH NEEDS TO BECOME ATTRACTED TO THIS FOR ITS OWN CHILDISH REASONS….
SO HERE IS THE ‘CLEVER BIT’ – TODAY WE MUST USE THE CYCLE OF FEAR/DESIRE/BOREDOM YOU ARE STUCK IN ‘AGAINST ITSELF’, make the process of GROWING UP attractive to YOU THE CHILD so YOU CAN CHANGE. SEE THE GOOD NEWS IS THAT GROWING UP IS NOT PRETENDING TO BE AN ADULT WHILST FEELING LIKE A WEAK ASS LITTLE CHILD – YOU ARE STILL A CHILD – ‘GOING UP’ IS A ‘RITE OF PASSAGE’ THAT ‘CHANGES YOU’, MAKES YOU BIGGER, STRONG ENOUGH TO ‘OVERPOWER’ ‘YOU THE CHILD’, as ‘YOU THE ADULT’ FEELS A SHITLOAD BETTER THAN THAT, FEELS POWERFUL, FEELS DIFFERENT.
NOW – STAY WITH ME HERE – YOU THE CHILD ALREADY SPENDS MUCH OF ITS LIFE CHASING EXPERIENCES THAT MAKE IT FEEL ‘LESS POWERLESS’ FOR A MOMENT, SORT OF A SLIDING SCALE OF COMFORTS UP TO WHAT THEY CALL PEAK EXPERIENCES, BIG THRILLS. So the trick to this GROWING UP is to GET IT TO ‘LOOK’ VERY SIMILIAR TO WHAT YOU ALREADY DO, PRESENT IT IN A WAY THAT ALSO FULFILS THAT NEED SO YOU THE CHILD WILL REMEMBER TO DO IT, JUST IN A DIFFERENT WAY THAN BEFORE IN RESPONSE TO THOSE SAME URGES FOR FUN – A WAY THAT ‘BUILDS YOU’ RATHER THAN ‘KILLS YOU’, A WAY THAT YOU WILL ALSO SEE THE IMPROVEMENT IN YOUR LIFE RESULTS, FAST…
SEE THE ISSUE HERE IS THAT I CAN NOT JUST TELL YOU ‘TO DEVELOP A SENSE OF DUTY TOWARD DEVELOPING A SENSE OF DUTY’ – ITS A CIRCULAR ARGUMENT AND YOU ARE NEVER GOING TO DO IT – YOU HAVE TO BE FORCED TO DO THAT AS A KID OR OTHERWISE IN A VERY STRCIT ‘DEATH OR GLORY’ ENVIROMENT FOR IT TO WORK. TODAY ‘YOU MUST FORCE YOU’ TO DO THIS, SO WE HAVE TO GET THIS PASSED YOUR CHILDISH SNIGGERING AT IT AS ‘NOT COOL’, THAT ‘YOU ARE FUCK UP SO YOU MIGHT AS WELL FACE IT’, ‘THAT SELF-HELP IS FOR DORKS’, ‘THAT FETISHIZED BDSM IS THE ONLY WAY YOU FEEL ALIVE’, THAT ‘YOU NEED DRUGS TO COPE BECAUSE OF WHAT YOU PARENTS DID TO YOU’, OR WHATEVER LEVEL OF WHINNY, WEAK ASS LITTLE EXCUSES OF ‘BLAH, BLAH, FUCKING BLAH’, IN SOME FUTURE MOMENT.
YES, YOUR CHILD MUST ALSO GET SOME BENEFITS FROM DOING THIS PROCESS, SO IT WILL HAPPILY ENGAGE IN THE PROCESS OF ITS OWN SELF-DESTRUCTION, INSTEAD OF ‘YOUR’ DESTRUCTION FOR A CHANGE – ITS QUITE SIMPLE REALLY :
TO GROW UP YOU MUST ‘DISASSOCIATE’ FROM ‘YOU THE CHILD’ AS IT IS A CHARACTER ‘BORN OF WEAKNESS’.
BUT YOU HAVE TO CHASE THAT GOAL WHILST STILL ACTUALLY BEING, FEELING, THINKING AND ACTING LIKE A CHILD.
SO YOU MUST UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU ‘ARE’, WHAT YOU HAVE ALWAYS BEEN, AND BE EMBARRASSED ENOUGH TO CHANGE IT – THIS IS THE TRICK TO ‘DISASSOCIATION’, TO UNDERSTAND IT ‘FIRST’, SO YOU CAN SEE IT ‘LATER’, WHEN ITS ‘HAPPENS’ VIA USING THAT UNDERSTANDING AS A PROCESS.
IN ITS HEART OF HEARTS, WHAT DISASSOCIATION MEANS IS THE RECOGNITION THAT YOU FEEL POWERLESS ALL THE TIME AS A CHILD, SO YOU DECIDE ‘TO CHANGE YOURSELF’ BY ‘MAKING THE CHOICE’ TO ‘DEVELOP THE HABIT’ OF ‘FEELING POWERFUL’ BY FOLLOWING A SET METHOD.
AND YOU MUST BE CLEAR ABOUT THIS, SO YOU KNOW TO LOOK FOR IT WHEN ‘CHANGE HAPPENS BY ITSELF’ WHEN YOU HAVE DONE THE METHOD, PERFECTED THE METHOD ENOUGH TO ‘TIP THE BALANCE’ BETWEEN YOU THE CHILD AND YOU THE ADULT DECISIVELY ONE WAY, AND DON’T JUST GET SCARED OR CONFUSED AGAIN – FOR MOST PEOPLE THE GATEWAY STATE OF MIND INTO ADULTHOOD IS A ‘BLANK CANVAS’ WHEN IT FIRST HAPPENS TO YOU, SO YOU MUST BE ‘TOLD WHAT TO DO’ NEXT.
YES – TO GROW UP YOU MUST FEEL DIFFERENT FROM A CHILD, FROM YOUR ‘THOUGHTS OF EGO SAFETY’ AND ‘SHORT, SHARP, PETTY EMOTIONS’, MUCH AS THOSE THINGS DON’T DISAPPEAR, THAT COMES LATER FOR GIFTED FOLK, BUT THEY ARE MUCH LESS COMPELLING BECAUSE YOU ARE NOW ‘MORE THAN’ THAT ‘CONSCIOUSLY’ AS ‘AN ADULT’ – YOU HAVE A NEW FOUND ‘SENSE OF YOURSELF’ THAT IS CONSTANT, BECAUSE THERE LITERALLY ARE X2 OF YOU NOW – YOU HAVE CREATED THE SPACE FOR ‘GIFTED YOU’ TO EMERGE INTO, SO EVEN LATER YOU CAN RECREATE YOURSELF, but lets not get ahead of ourselves…
SO HOW DOES THIS WORK THEN? EASY – SEE THE EASY WAY TO THIS IS THIS EASY:
YOU MUST SEPARATE YOURSELF FROM ‘YOU THE CHILDISH STATE OF MIND’ VIA ALWAYS HAVING A BIGGER GOAL IN THE MOMENT.
READ THAT AGAIN…
NOW READ IT AGAIN – UNDERSTAND THE HARD PART IS REMEMBERING TO DO IT, ALL THE TIME…
IN THE SENSE OF GROWING UP THIS GOAL IS SIMPLY THE FELT ‘ACQUISITION AND GROWTH’ OF ‘THE SENSATION OF YOUR BOTTLE’ AS YOUR ONLY ‘HIGHER PURPOSE’.
WITHOUT THIS QUALITY OF BOTTLE ALL OTHER GOALS ARE JUST EGO MANIA, CHILDISH FANTASIES.
AND READ THAT AGAIN – THEN AGAIN PLEASE…
THE HIGHER PURPOSE YOU MUST REMEMBER ALL THE TIME IS THAT YOU ARE ACTING WITH THE POINT OF DEVELOPING YOUR BOTTLE, IN EVERYTHING YOU DO AND SAY AND FEEL…
BUT YOU ARE NOT ACTING IN THE SENSE OF PRETENDING TO HAVE BOTTLE, YOU ARE ‘ACTING’ OUT THE PROCESS OF REACHING FOR THE FEELING OF YOUR BOTTLE, INSTEAD OF JUST REACTING NORMALLY, SO YOU CREATE ‘A GAP’ IN YOUR REACTIONS BY SWITCHING TO THE SENSATION OF YOUR BOTTLE.
UNDERSTAND IN THE RINZAI ZEN SENSE WHAT WE ARE TEACHING YOU HERE IS TO BE ‘SERIOUS’ IN A GOOD WAY – TO HAVE ‘ONE GOAL FRONT OF MIND THAT IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN ANYTHING ELSE’, SO WHATEVER ELSE HAPPENS IS ‘EXCLUDED’ FROM THE CHOICE OF YOUR ‘NEXT DECISION’.
IN TIME YOUR LONGER, STRONGER ‘HIGHER’ ‘THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS’, A NEW DEEPER ‘SENSE OF YOURSELF’, MUST OVERPOWER YOUR WEAK, PETTY, MOMENTARY ‘THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS’ AS THEY COME AND GO FOR A CHILD, AND IT MUST FEEL ‘NATURAL’, ‘RIGHT’.
YES – YOU MUST UNDERSTAND THAT ‘THE YOU’ READING THIS’ IS NOT ACTUALLY YOU, THERE IS A MUCH BETTER VERSION OF YOU WAITING IN THE WINGS, BUT THAT YOU IS NOT ON THE SAME LEVEL AS YOUR ‘CONFLICTION’, IT IS ‘YOUR POINT’ WHICH IS ABOVE YOUR CONFLICTION, SO IT ALWAYS WINS – YOUR FUTURE GOALS BROUGHT INTO THE PRESENT MOMENT. SO ‘YOU’ MUST UNDERSTAND WHAT ‘YOUR YOU’ ACTUALLY ‘IS’ – ‘THE RESOURCES’ AVAILABLE TO THE CONSCIOUS SELF IN THE MOMENT, THE LEVEL OF THOUGHTS, FEELINGS, SENSATIONS, FOCUS, INSIGHT, THINGS THAT MAKE UP YOUR EXPERIENCE OF LIFE, ‘HOW YOU FEEL’, YOUR SENSE OF YOURSELF.
ANY CHANGE TO YOUR SENSE OF YOURSELF HAS TO FEEL GOOD TO ‘YOU THE ANIMAL’ IN THE NOW TO WORK QUICKLY.
SO WE MUST TEACH YOU THAT ‘WEARING’ ‘YOU THE ADULT’ FEELS BETTER THAN YOU THE CHILD, WHILST YOU ARE STILL FEELING, THINKING, REACTING LIKE A CHILD – YOU MUST CON THE LAZY BITCH.
THIS APPROACH IS ‘THE ONLY WAY YOU CAN GROW YOURSELF UP’ WITHOUT EXTERNAL INTERVENTION = THE ‘HABIT OF FEELING’ THE LONGER, DEEPER ‘SENSE OF POWER THAT COMES FROM BOTTLE’, WHICH IS A NEW SENSE OF YOURSELF, BECAUSE THE RESOURCES AVAILABLE TO YOU ARE ‘BETTER THAN’.
SEE A CHILD FEELS POWERLESS BY DEFINITION SIMPLY BECAUSE THEY ARE PUSHED AROUND BY THEIR ANIMAL MOOD SWINGS WHICH DESTROY THEIR CONSTANT SENSE OF SELF, AND SO TRIES TO GENERATE MOMENTS OF POWERFUL FEELING TO GET SOME RELIEF = YOUR ‘NO SENSE OF YOURSELF’.
SPECIFICALLY, AN ADULT SENSE OF YOURSELF GROWS TO BE BIGGER THAN YOUR MOMENTARY, REACTIONARY SENSE OF YOURSELF, SO THEN ‘YOU THE CHANGEABLE CHILD’ STOPS BEING ‘ALL OF YOUR CONSCIOUSNESS’ AND BECOMES A SMALLER PART OF IT – THAT IS ‘HOW AN ADULT FEELS’ NATURALLY.
THE PROBLEM IS THAT THIS CHANGE IS GOING TO FEEL ‘UN-NATURAL’ TO YOU, AS YOUR ‘NATURE’ IS WEAK AND CHILDISH, SO YOU MUST PUSH PAST IT – A CHILD BECOMES ADDICTED TO THE ‘DRAMA CYCLE’ UNCONSCIOUSLY AS ITS NORMAL, THEY LOVE FOREVER ‘COMFORTING THEMSELVES FOR A MOMENT’.
BE CLEAR – THE SIMPLE WAY YOU CREATE ‘ADULT YOU’ AS A SEED IS BY HAVING A HIGHER ‘POINT TO YOUR ACTIONS’ IN THE MOMENT THAT IS BIGGER THAN YOUR CHILDISH MOOD SWINGS SIMPLY BECAUSE ‘YOU HAVE DECIDED THAT’. AT THE START ‘THAT POINT’ IS WHAT ADULT YOU ‘IS’, EVERYTHING ELSE IS STILL YOU THE CHILD, IT IS STILL ‘WEAKNESS IN THE FACE OF ADVERSITY’, BUT YOUR NEW FOUND POINT IS WHERE YOU GATHER YOUR ‘STRENGTH’, GATHER ‘THE TRUTH’, AND START TO ‘STOP YOUR ROUTINES’, MAYBE EVEN ADD SOME ‘ADVENTURE’.
THE ISSUE IS YOU WILL NOT STICK TO THAT UNLESS IT IS MORE ATTRACTIVE, MORE PLEASUREABLE TO ‘YOU THE CHILD’ THAN ‘YOUR NORMAL’, AS A HALFWAY HOUSE FOR YOU TO ‘REST YOUR MIND IN’, TO COMFORT YOURSELF AGAINST THE UNCERTAINTY OF CHANGE LIKE ‘A NEW DRUG’. AND THAT IS WHY I USE ‘THE CONSTANT PLEASURE OF HAVING BOTTLE’ – MUCH AS THERE ARE OTHER WAYS OF DOING IT, BOTTLE IS GENERIC, BUT SEX, SUFFERING, BIG SHOCKS ETC ARE MUCH MORE SPECIFIC TO ‘TYPE’, PLUS THEY ALSO REQUIRE WELL TRAINED SUPERVISION NOT TO GO BADLY WRONG…
In the way you will come to understand the manners of FREEMASONARY, OF THE ARISTOCRAT, OF THE FACT THAT, FOR EXAMPLE, TO CHOOSE TO BE KIND TO PEOPLE WHO CLEARLY DON’T DESERVE IN THE MOMENT OF THAT KINDNESS, AND SO GO AGAINST YOURSELF, YOUR INSTINCTS TO BE MEAN OUT OF CHOICE RATHER THAN FEAR, BECAUSE YOU HAVE NO FEAR OF CONFLICT, YOU ARE ACTUALLY BUILDING YOURSELF UP, MAKING YOURSELF MORE AND MORE POWERFUL VIA THE EXERCISE OF THAT POWER AGAINST THE CHALLENGE OF YOUR CHILDISH EGO. See, much to your total shock I’m sure, ‘ADULT MANNERS DO ACTUALLY MAKETH MAN’… I know, and all this time you were JUST trying, EVER SO DESPERATELY to be ‘secretly cunning’, like A rat, WHILST MAKING A TOTAL TWAT OF YOURSELF AS THAT SECRET CUNNING IS WHAT YOU THOUGHT BEING AN ADULT WAS EH… YEP, ‘BRITISH MANNERS’ ARE NOT ABOUT BEING ‘NICE’, EVEN CLASSY, THEY ARE TOTALLY, 100% SELFISH.
SEE, YOU HAVE TO GET OVER ALL YOUR HARD-CODED, DEEP-STATE PROGRAMMING ABOUT GROWING UP RIGHT FUCKING NOW, THIS POST IS NOT ABOUT DENYING YOU ALL YOUR TRIVIAL FUN, THIS POST IS ABOUT GROWING UP ENOUGH SO YOU CAN ACTUALLY HAVE FUN, LIVE FOR FUN, ADVENTURE, CHALLENGE, RATHER THAN ‘CHEAP THRILLS’ AS COMFORTERS WHILST YOU LIVE ‘LIKE A SCAREDY CAT’. THAT’S ‘JUST EXISTING’…
OVERALL I HAVE TO GET YOU USED TO ‘WINNING’ AGAINST YOURSELF, AGAINST THE CHALLENGES OF ANIMAL LIFE, SO THAT YOU START ‘EXPECTING TO WIN’ AS A BASELINE STATE = CONFIDENCE. For many of you this is a HUGE CHANGE, as ‘a CHILD EXPECTS TO LOSE’, HOWEVER UNCONSCIOUSLY, THEREFORE THINKS AND ACTS IN THIS WAY AS A BASELINE STATE. YOU ARE UNCONSCIOUSLY PUSHED AROUND ALL THE TIME BY YOUR INTRICATE LITTLE ‘COMPLEXES’ OF FEAR/DESIRE/BOREDOM LIKE AN ANIMAL, BY YOUR E-MOTIONS – THE FEELINGS THAT CAUSE YOU TO MOVE. But there is no point telling you that ‘LIFE IS SUFFERING’ (Sorry, The Buddha), that the ONLY reason you move AT ALL AS A CHILD is to briefly relieve the PETTY PRESSURE OF SOME COMBINATION OF BOREDOM, FEAR, DESIRE, as it will DO nothing to change it, IN THE MOMENT OF FEELING IT…
SEE YOU JUST ACCEPT IT AS NORMAL, SO YOUR UNCONSCIOUS COMPLEXES OF CRAP, THAT APPEAR SO MEANINGFUL TO YOU, YET ARE DUMB AS FUCK IN REALITY, 100% OWN YOU (YES, AT AN ANIMAL LEVEL YOUR UNCONSCIOUS IS STUPID), OWN ‘CONSCIOUS YOU’ – THE MASTER’ HAS BECOME ‘THE SLAVE’. For many of YOU this issue is so bad THAT YOU SIMPLY CAN’T DO CONFLICT AT ALL, YOU FREELY ADMIT IT WHILST TRYING TO REPOSITION IT MENTALLY AS SOME SORT OF FUCKED UP GOOD THING, whilst getting ‘ass raped’ by LIFE. See this is what we mean by JUST EXISTING, you are simply trying to ‘survive the day’ as painlessly as possible, so you call that ‘winning’, YET YOU DID NOTHING BUT EXIST, so FOR YOU IT WAS ‘A GOOD DAY’ BECAUSE IT WAS ‘NOT THAT BAD’ – ITS OK THAT EVERYTHING IS SHIT AS LONG AS YOU GET TO YOUR BANAL COMFORTS LATER. THAT IS NOT WINNING, ITS LOSING, YOU ARE A LOSER PRETENDING TO WIN TO COMFORT YOURSELF, WHILST ‘FITTING IN’ FOR A QUIET, SAFE, TEDIOUS LITTLE LIFE.
AND WHO THE FUCK WANTS A QUIET, NORMAL LIFE AS A CHILD, A LIFE WHERE NOTHING FUCKING HAPPENS, where ‘THE NEEDLE RETURNS TO THE START OF THE SONG AND YOU ALL SING ALONG LIKE BEFORE’ (Sorry Del Amitri). SO WE HAVE TO HIT THE DRAMA BUTTON HARD ON THIS ONE BOYS AND GIRLS, as you must CHANGE YOUR MIND ABOUT WHAT GROWING UP ‘IS’ = THE AQUISTION AND USE OF ‘THE SENSATION OF BOTTLE’. THIS IS YOUR SELF-INFLICTED ‘RITE OF PASSAGE’, WHERE WE CON YOUR LITTLE CHILD INTO CHOOSING TO GROW UP BY DITCHING THE BUDDHAS ADVICE, AND TAKING SUNS TZUS INSTEAD – WE GROW YOU UP VIA DECEIVING YOUR CHILD THAT THIS IS SIMPLY THE NEXT GOOD TIME, so you have some decent chance of DOING IT…
CLEVER EH? YEP, BUT DO YOU KNOW WHY WE HAVE TO DO THIS WAY…? DO YOU KNOW WHY YOU HAVE TO CLASS YOUR SHIT UP, GET SOME GAME, SOME OVERSIGHT OF YOURSELF, HOPEFULLY SOMETIME BEFORE YOU BITCHES ACTUALLY BORE MY ASS TO DEATH..?
SEE YOU THINK THIS IS ‘BORING’, DON’T YOU, YET ITS SOOOOOOO COOL TO BE A CHILD, TO BE GUTLESS, HARMLESS AND JUST CHASE ‘COMFORT’.
YET YOUR LIFE ONLY REALLY STARTS AFTER YOU HAVE GROWN UP, AS THAT IS THE ONLY TIME YOU CAN EVER DO ANY FUCKING THING.
SEE WHEN YOU HAVE BOTTLE YOU CAN DECIDE TO DO SOMETHING ‘COME WHAT MAY’, BECAUSE YOU CAN BE ‘CONSISTENT’.
BUT IN ORDER TO DO ANYTHING, TO BE AN ADULT, ‘YOU’ MUST ‘DISASSOCIATE’ FROM ‘THE YOU’ THAT ‘CAN’T DO SHIT’…
THIS DISASSOCIATION IS A STATE OF MIND, A DIFFERENT FEELING, NOT JUST THE BELIEF/OPINION ABOUT YOURSELF.
SEE IT IS NO USE JUST TELLING YOURSELF ‘YOU’, THE CHILDISH FUCK UP, IS ‘SHIT’, YOU MUST SEE YOURSELF BE SHIT, BE WRONG.
MANY OF YOU HAVE ALREADY HAD THIS BY ACCIDENT FOR A MOMENT OR 2, WITH NO CLUE WHAT IT IS FOR, SO WASTED IT.
BUT UNLIKE ANY PREVIOUS EPISODES, YOU MUST NOW DO IT ‘ON PURPOSE’, LIKE A ZEN ADEPT WHO KNOWS ‘WHO THEY ARE’.
SO YOU MUST START TO AIM FOR MUCH STRONGER, DEEPER, LONGER LEVELS OF CONTROLLED FEELING, AS THAT IS THE POINT.
YEP – YOUR ‘CLASSLESS’ SOCIETY HAS LEFT YOU TO ROT AT THE BACK OF THE BUS, WITH YOUR SUGARY SNACKS, YOUR SHORT SKIRT, AND YOUR EVEN SHORTER MEMORY, CHASING ONE WEAK, MOMENTARY EMOTION AFTER ANOTHER, BECAUSE IT NEVER TOLD YOU WHAT CLASS WAS ACTUALLY FOR – YOUR SOCIETY IS DESIGNED AS A ‘FIELD FOR COWS’, WHO MUST BE KEPT DELUDED TO BE HAPPY, STABLE, OTHERWISE THEY ATTACK THE FARMERS…
SEE ALL YOUR CRAVING FOR ‘TRIVIAL FUN’, ‘COMFORT’ IS BECAUSE YOU HAVE NOT GROWN UP – YOUR ‘FUN’ IS JUST A LESSER TYPE OF ‘BOREDOM’.
NOT THAT IT IS YOUR FAULT OF COURSE, BUT IT IS ‘THE PROBLEM’, AND THE ROOT OF ALL YOUR OTHER PROBLEMS, ALL YOUR ‘FAILURE’.
YES, TO LIVE LIKE A CHILD AS AN ADULT MEANS THERE IS ACTUALLY SOMETHING ‘WRONG WITH YOU’ – IT’S SICK, UNNATURAL.
BUT YOU THINK ‘WE’ ENVY YOU DON’T YOU, THAT WE DENY OURSELVES AND SUFFER FOR SOME IMPOSSIBLE GOOD, AND THAT JUST TO READ ABOUT DEVELOPMENT, CHAT ABOUT IT LIKE YOU KNOW ANY FUCKING THING WHILST STILL BEING A BIG KID IS ‘THE SHIT’, THE BEST OF BOTH WORLDS, LIKE A CLEVER BITCH… BUT YOU ARE DEAD WRONG, YOU ARE A FAKE TWAT, SO UNLESS WE GET YOU TO CHANGE THAT OPINION YOU ARE FUCKING DOOMED – TO KNOW ABOUT DEVELOPMENT AND NOT DO IT ON PURPOSE IS THE WORST OF BOTH WORLDS YOU TOOL, CAUSE IT DEGRADES YOU EVEN QUICKER…
AND IF YOU WANT TO FIX IT, IF YOU WANT TO ‘STOP FAILING’, IT’S VERY IMPORTANT YOU SEE IT FROM THIS PERSPECTIVE.
SEE, I’M NOT KIDDING, TO US YOU ARE NO BETTER THAN THE CRACKHEADS IN THE STREET APPEAR TO YOU – FREAKS.
BUT IF YOU DON’T, IF YOU ARE A HAPPY LITTLE FUCK-UP LIKE ‘MOST OF YOU’, THEN STOP READING RIGHT NOW.
See TO GROW UP AS AN ADULT MEANS YOU ARE GOING TO NEED A LOT OF EMOTIONAL ENERGY, AT THE LEVEL YOU ONCE HAD AS A CHILD, PRODUCE AND DIRECT THIS ENERGY TO YOUR BENEFIT, INSTEAD OF THE WAY YOU DO NOW AS A KID, WHERE YOU CHASE YOUR DEGREDATION, YOUR HUMILIATION, YOUR DEMISE. And that is really NOT COOL, that is a ‘crackhead’, SO EVEN THE STATE YOU READ THIS IN MUST CHANGE, YOU MUST SEE YOUR STRANGENESS FOR WHAT IT IS, A FORM OF ILLNESS, OF SELF DESTRUCTION THAT IS NOT COOL, IT’S LITERALLY TOXIC, POISONOUS, PARASITIC = YOU’RE A ‘BAD ACTOR’.
YOU MUST STOP JUSTIFYING BEING A TOTAL ‘PUSSY’, ‘GROW UP’ AND STAND UP ‘TO’ YOURSELF BY CHOICE, NOT FEAR.
SEE EVERY DECENT THING YOU WANT IS ON THE OTHER SIDE OF ‘GROWING UP’, EVERYTHING WORTH HAVING AT ALL.
BUT SOON YOU WON’T HAVE ENOUGH ENERGY LEFT TO ‘GROW UP’, YOU WILL HAVE PISSED IT ALL AWAY ON BEING A CHILD.
SEE RIGHT NOW YOU ARE A STEREOTYPE, A COPYCAT – YOU CAN NEVER BE AN INDIVIDUAL AS A CHILD, JUST A FUCKED UP KID.
SO HOWEVER STEREOTYPICAL THE PHRASE HAS BECOME, IT IS STILL BLOODY AWESOME:
‘YOU MUST GET A GRIP’ WHILE THERE IS STILL SOMETHING LEFT TO GRIP ONTO.
WHY DO I LOVE THIS SO MUCH, EASY – ALL ‘BOTTLE’ AT A TRAINEE LEVEL STARTS FROM ‘TUNING INTO’ A SENSATION OF ‘RELAXED’ INTERNAL TENSION, A TYPE OF STRENGTH THAT CREATES ENERGY, THAT FEELS LIKE ‘ANOTHER YOU’ IS ‘GRIPPING ONTO YOURSELF’ WITHOUT TRYING THAT HARD. THE TRICK FOR GIFTED SPECIFICALLY IS TO TRY AND TUNE IN TO SOMETHING THAT IS ALREADY THERE AS AN EMOTIONAL TENSION ONCE YOU GET ‘KEYED UP’ OR ‘GIRD YOUR LOINS’, RATHER THAN JUST TRY AND CREATE RANDOM PHYSICAL TENSION, WHICH IS AN ANIMAL-LEVEL THING.
IF YOU ARE LUCKY, AND HAVE SUFFERED OFTEN FROM THE GIFTED LEVEL OF SELF-CONSCIOUS EMBARRASSMENT, then you will know what it feels like TO BE GRIPPED BY SOMETHING INTERNALLY THAT FEELS EXTERNAL. NOW you must train yourself to feel that sensation ON COMMAND, VIA EVOKING IT SO YOU CAN ‘TUNE INTO IT’, WITHOUT LABELLING IT AS FEAR OR ‘EMBARRASSMENT’, as it is actually THERE ALL THE TIME. See fear and embarrassment just make YOUR BOTTLE stronger for a moment, MAKE YOU LABEL A DEEP AND COMPLEX THING AS LITTLE MORE THAN YOUR PETTY LITTLE JUDGEMENT OF ONE TINY ASPECT OF IT THAT YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND, because you are a CHILD – YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU ARE FEELING IS BOTH NECESSARY AND GOOD FOR YOU…
YEP, I KNOW ITS SIMPLE BUT SO DA FUCK ARE YOU BITCH – ALL CHILDREN ARE ‘DUMB AS A BRICK’. SO IF YOU ARE GIFTED YOU MUST UNDERSTAND NOW – THE REASON YOU HAVE NOT GROWN UP SO FAR IS YOU HAVE FAILED ALL THE CHALLENGES YOU HAVE BEEN SET BY YOUR CONSCIENCE – YOU HAVE ‘BOTTLED IT’ BECAUSE YOU HAVE ‘NO SENSE OF YOUR BOTTLE’ CONSCIOUSLY, AND SO YOU HAVE CONTINUED TO BOTTLE IT OVER AND OVER AGAIN, TO THE POINT YOU HAVE FORGOTTEN WHAT NOT BOTTLING IT EVEN FUCKING LOOKS LIKE. SO INSTEAD OF ‘A LIFE’ YOU CHOOSE THE COMFORTS OF A CHILD, ATTENTION, FANTASY, CHEAP THRILLS, OBLIVION INSTEAD OF THE COMFORTS OF ELITISM, OF POWER, OF DOMINION.
SO DO NOT DELUDE YOURSELF EVER AGAIN, FAILING TO GROW UP MEANS YOU ARE A FAILURE AS A HUMAN BEING:
YOU HAVE BOTTLED GROWING UP, IT’S NOT A CHOICE YOU HAVE MADE, YOU ARE JUST SCARED SHITLESS OF IT, AS YOU ARE ‘UNAWARE’.
YES, THE KEY REASON MOST OF YOU HAVE NOT GROWN UP IS YOU FAILED AS A KID, YOU RAN AWAY FROM YOURSELF OUT OF WEAKNESS.
THIS MEANS YOU COULD NOT TAKE THE ‘HIT AND CHANGE’, IMPROVE YOURSELF, YOU SIMPLY MADE EXCUSES AND GOT WEAKER.
YOU CHOSE COMFORT, SECURITY, FANTASY OVER CHALLENGE = EGO SAFETY, AND NOW YOU ARE STUCK THERE, IN ‘LIMBO’.
YES, THE TELLTALE SIGN IS THAT YOU FAIL CONSTANTLY, YET YOU STILL THINK YOU ARE CLEVER, SECRETLY IN YOURSELF…
REALLY? BITCH PLEASE – THERE IS SOMETHING WRONG WITH YOU, A BIG BIT OF YOU IS ‘MISSING IN ACTION’. SO YOU ARE GOING TO SPEND THE REST OF YOUR LIFE BEING THE COMEDY VILLAIN IN SOME CHEAP PANTOMINE SHOW, THE ONE WHO ALWAYS LOSES, EVEN WHEN ‘YOU WIN’, AS EVERY SINGLE MOMENTARY, TRIVIAL AND QUICKLY FORGOTTEN WIN KILLS YOU JUST A BIT QUICKER…
PLEASE UNDERSTAND – IF YOU DON’T GROW UP YOU WILL LIVE THE REST OF YOUR LIFE IN A STATE OF ‘EXISTENTIAL DREAD’, FEAR OF LIFE ITSELF, OF THE NEXT THING THAT MAY HAPPEN, TO LIVE MOMENT TO MOMENT WITH NO SENSE OF YOURSELF, NO SENSE OF YOUR OWN MORTALITY, NO SENSE OF WHAT MATTERS, WITH ONLY THE COMFORTS OF AN ANIMAL TO MAKE IT BEARABLE. THIS IS WHAT A CHILD ‘IS’, BECAUSE THE REST OF YOUR CONSCIOUSNESS, THE REST OF YOU THE ADULT, THAT SHOULD BE THERE TO STOP ALL YOUR MOMENTS FROM FUCKING UP YOUR EMOTIONAL ‘EXPERIENCE OF LIFE’, YOUR MOOD, ANY CONSISTENT SENSE OF YOURSELF, OF ANY ABILITY TO STICK TO YOUR DECISIONS AND DO ANYTHING, IS ‘MISSING’.
SEE THE LIFE OF A CHILD IS A LIFE NOT WORTH LIVING, THAT IS THE LIFE OF A SLAVE, WHO KNOWS NOTHING, DOES NOTHING, FEELS NOTHING, BECAUSE THEY ARE ‘NOTHING’ SOLID, THE WIND OF EXPERIENCE BLOWS STRAIGHT THROUGH YOU, AND YOU ARE A VICTIM OF EVERY MOTHERFUCKING SHITTY LITTLE THING THAT HAPPENS. THOSE HAPPENINGS DEFINE YOUR MOMENTARY LITTLE LIFE AS HAPPY OR SAD, AS IT CHANGES BACK AND FORTH 1000 TIMES A DAY WITH YOUR UNCONTROLLABLE REACTIONS TO THAT REALITY, YOU UNBIDDEN LITTLE FEARS AND DESIRES AS THEY ARE UNCONSCIOUSLY TRIGGERED BY LITTLE MORE THAN THE COLOUR OF A FUCKING WALL YOU JUST WALKED PASSED, THE TIGHTNESS OF YOUR BLOODY SHOES…
DO YOU GET THE POINT OF GROWING UP YET? YOU ARE A LITTLE CHILD, WHO LIVES A LITTLE LIFE, ON YOUR LITTLE ANT HILL, THINKING LITTLE THOUGHTS, FEELING LITTLE EMOTIONS, WHILE YOU ACT OUT YOUR ‘ACCIDENTAL’ LITTLE PROGRAMMING. YEP – YOU HAVE NEVER DONE ANYTHING ON PURPOSE HAVE YOU, YOU JUST GET OUT OF BED EVERY DAY AND ‘EXIST’, YOU WHOLE LIFE IS ‘RANDOM CHANCE’ of being dominated by YOUR PREPROGRAMMED UNCONSCIOUS REACTIONS TO YOUR TRIVIAL LITTLE REALITY…
A CHILD CAN NEVER DO ANYTHING BUT REACT THE WAY THEIR CRUSHING NEED FOR EGO SAFETY TELLS THEM TO, BECAUSE YOUR WHOLE MINDSET, YOUR WHOLE REALITY SHELL IS THAT OF CHILD, WHAT YOUR LIMITED LIFE EXPERIENCE TAUGHT YOU AS A CHILD, BECAUSE ‘YOU HAVE NEVER CHANGED IT! YET EVERYTHING ELSE ABOUT YOU, AROUND YOU, THE FUTURE OF YOU IS TOTALLY DIFFERENT BUT YOUR STATE OF MIND IS IDENTICAL TO THAT STUPID LITTLE 12 Y/O WHO SPENT MOST OF THEIR EARLY YEARS SCARED SHITLESS…
SEE WHAT YOU ‘BELIEVE IS POSSIBLE OR IMPOSSIBLE’ IS BASED ON BEING ‘TOLD WHAT TO DO BECAUSE YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO AS A CHILD’, YOU ARE VUNERABLE, AND YOU HAVE TO MAKE UP ‘YOUR TRUTH’ (WHICH IS NOT TRUE) FROM THIS LACK OF KNOWING – ‘YOUR TRUTH’ BECOMES THE LITTLE MORE THAN THE MOMENTARY OPINION OF A CHILD, AT SOME RANDOM TIME FOR SOME RANDOM REASON COMPLELEY UNRELATED TO WHAT YOU ARE USING THAT TRUTH FOR NOW, BECAUSE NO ONE TAUGHT YOU WHAT ‘THE TRUTH’ FEELS LIKE.
YOU HAVE SIMPLY GOT USED TO ‘BEING POWERLESS AND STUPID’ SO CALL IT ‘NORMAL’, SO IT IS THE BASELINE OF YOUR CHARACTER, YOUR UTTER DEPENDENCE ON OTHERS IS THE CORE OF YOUR FAKE SELF, AND YOU KNOW THIS UNCONSCIOUSLY, SO YOU ARE CONSTANTLY TRYING TO FEEL CLEVER, BETTER, TO ESCAPE THE UTTER ‘NOTHINGNESS’ OF ‘NORMAL PEOPLE’ FOR A MOMENT – IT IS A REACTION TO ANXIETY…
TRUST ME, SHOULD YOU EVER GET ANYWHERE AS A GIFTED ARISTOS YOU WILL LEARN TO FUCKING LOATHE NORMAL PEOPLE, AS THEY DON’T EVEN HAVE THE FUCKING BALLS TO CARRY OUT THE PETTY EVIL IN THEIR PETTY, SELF-OBSESSED SOULS. NORMAL PEOPLE ARE CREEPY, THEY ARE THE OPPOSITE OF A GROWN UP, SO THEY SPEND THEIR WHOLE LIVES MASTERING BEING SECRETLY CREEPY, AND THEY CALL IT ‘BEING CLEVER’, AS IT MAKES THEM ‘FEEL CLEVER’, SO MAKES ALL ELSE ‘BEARABLE’. TRUST ME, TO US ‘YOU THE CHILD’ IS SO ‘NAUSEATINGLY OBVIOUS’ AS TO BE ‘UNBEARABLE’…
BE CLEAR NOW – TO BE A CHILD AS AN ADULT IS TO BE LITERALLY STUCK IN THAT EXACT SAME CHILDISH REALITY SHELL AS A 12 Y/O, THAT IS WHAT EGO SAFETY ‘IS’, HOW IT WORKS, IT ‘BLANKS OUT’ YOUR CHOICES, YOUR POWER, YOUR FREEDOM TO BE WHOEVER YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO BE, AND OFFERS YOU ‘BANAL, MOMENTARY COMFORTS’ TO DISTRACT YOU INSTEAD. SO YOU FEEL BRIEFLY CLEVER, WHICH IS NOT CLEVERNESS AT ALL, ITS A SENSE OF FAKE RELIEF THAT YOU ARE NOT THE COMPLETE AND UTTER TWAT THAT YOU SO OBVIOUSLY ARE – THINK NOW, MANY OF YOUR ENTIRE LIVES COULD BE DESTROYED WITH LITTLE MORE THAN A CHAT MESSAGE AND A COUPLE OF PICTURES AND YOU SIMPLY COULD NOT STOP IT = HARMLESS LITTLE FAILURE.
BUT AN ADULT HAS THE POWER TO ENFORCE THEIR WILL ON REALITY, ON THEMSELVES, BECAUSE AN ADULT USES THEIR POWER AGAINST CHALLENGE, SPECIFICALLY AGAINST THEIR FALSE INSTINCTS, AND SO GETS BIGGER BECAUSE OF THAT ‘USE OF POWER’, AS IT MAKES THEM MORE POWERFUL – TO DEVELOP POWER-OVER-YOURSELF ‘YOU MUST USE IT’ WITH EFFORT! TRUST ME, YOU ARE NEVER GONG TO GET TO FAR WITH YOUR ‘SLOW HORSES AND FAST WOMEN’ OTHERWISE, AND ALL YOU HAVE TO LOSE ARE ‘THE SECRET, MOMENTARY COMFORTS’ OF BEING A FAKE TWAT – A BITCH…
Yes, the more you TRY AND GROW UP THE EASIER GROWING UP BECOMES, BECAUSE EVEN IF YOU FAIL IN THE MOMENT YOU ARE ACTUALLY SUCCEEDING BY CONTINUING TO TRY HARDER, AS YOU ARE BUILDING YOUR POWER TOO DO IT BETTER NEXT TIME AGAINST THE FALSE INSTINCTS THAT ARE SCREAMING AT YOU TO QUIT = YOUR BOTTLE! SEE YOU ONLY ‘HAVE POWER IN THE MOMENT OF ITS USE AGAINST RESISTANCE’, THAT IS WHY YOUR GIFTED POWER HAS LARGELY GONE, ROTTED AWAY – YOU can’t do conflict can you, YOU DON’T SEE THAT IT IS ACTUALLY THE KEY MECHANISM OF LIFE, OF EVOLUTION, INDEED THE REASON WE ARE ALL HERE, and that without it FOLKS ARE JUST ‘JELLY ON A PLATE’, INDEED THEY ARE JUST VICTIMS OF OTHER CHILDREN…
SERIOUSLY – DO YOU WANT TO SPEND THE REST OF YOUR LIFE MAKING THE SAME DORK-LEVEL MISTAKES YOU MADE AS A CHILD, THE HIGH POINT OF WHICH HAS LONG SINCE PASSED AS EVERYTHING IN YOUR WORLD HAS ALREADY CHANGED MULTIPLE TIMES, YOU HAVE GOT OLDER AND UGLIER, SO YOUR DOWNSLOPE IS JUST GOING TO GET STEEPER AND STEEPER?
Now the reason I say ‘Most of you’ is I am INCLUDING MANY OF YOU WHO THINK YOU HAVE CHANGED, you have ‘CHOSEN’ to ‘act’ MATURE, RESPONSIBLE, DECENT, GOOD even, so its bad news I’m afraid – YOU ARE LYING TO YOURSELF, BECAUSE THAT IS NOT WHAT GROWING UP MEANS. See THOSE AFFECTATIONS ARE WHAT YOU CAN CHOOSE TO DO ‘WITH’ GROWING UP, and frankly you can choose way ‘BETTER THAN’ THOSE ONES, as those ones are really just about being ‘kind to the animals’, so as a DOMESTICATED animal you have heard of them, and hence COPY THEM TO FAKE BEING AN ADULT IN PUBLIC WHILST YOU QUIETLY FALL APART IN PRIVATE, but the stuff you have NEVER HEARD OF IS WAY MORE FUN…
See you are UNEDUCATED BY YOUR SOCIETY, YOU HAVE NO ‘CLASS STRUCTURE’ – ALL CLASS STRUCTURES, even religious ‘STRUCTURES OF LIFE’ HAVE A FORM OF FORCED ADULTHOOD BUILT INTO THEM, where they go out of their to GROW YOU UP, TO PREPARE YOU FOR LIFE AS A MAN OR WOMAN. You never did ANY OF THAT DID YOU, you think BEING A CHILD, LIVING IN A CHILDISH STATE OF MIND IS ALL THERE IS, IS COOL, AND YOU ARE ENTITLED TO IT, blissfully unaware you ONLY have the freedoms you have because THE ADULTS WHERE THERE TO CUT THEM OUT OF THE JUNGLE FOR YOU TO ENJOY – YOU DON’T DESERVE A FUCKING THING, BECAUSE YOU HAVE NEVER DONE ANYTHING AT ALL HAVE YOU, YOU ARE A DISTURBED LITTLE CHILD…
You think growing up IS to deny yourself the childish fun and fantasies, THAT MAKE YOUR SLAVE EXISTENCE BEARABLE, just TO FIT IN, SO ITS FINE TO SIMPLY FAKE IT AS YOU GET OLDER, but in reality GROWING UP means finding out who the fuck you really are BY FINDNG WHAT YOU ARE GOOD AT NATURALLY, BETTER AT THAN OTHER PEOPLE AS A ‘PREDISPOSITION’. THEREFORE THAT IS WHAT YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO BE DOING, SO YOUR LIFE IS NOT UNBEARABLE ANYMORE – TO LIVE YOUR ‘LIFE AS ART’, instead of a tedious little fuck up, so busy repeating their mistakes that they DON’T SEE EVERYONE ELSE LAUGHING…
WE CHOOSE THE ‘ADVENTURE OF LIFE’, where you GO HOME TO YOURSELF, where you CHANGE OFTEN AND DRAMATICALLY TO SUIT YOURSELF, where you think shit up THAT IS RIGHT FOR YOU and do it as you wish, where the loyalty and integrity you so desperately lack is easy, because you are CONFIDENT ENOUGH NOT TO HAVE TO LIE AND HIDE ALL THE TIME – outside of a kind ‘politeness’ GIFTED ADULTS DON’T REALLY GIVE A FUCK = the BADASS of an ARISTOS. YEP, by remaining a CHILD FOREVER, you are missing out on STUFF YOU HAVE NO IDEA EXISTS, WHILST MAKING A TOTAL TWAT OF YOURSELF IN FRONT OF YOUR OWN KIND, who can only watch and pity you, as talking to you is pointless – YOU HAVE THE MIND OF A CHILD, YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW WHAT ‘WORDS’ MEAN…
So you must be clear:
YOU CAN NOT JUST ‘DECIDE’ TO GROW UP AS NOTHING ‘INSIDE YOU’ WILL CHANGE BECAUSE OF THAT DECISION ALONE.
YES – YOU CAN NOT MAKE A DECISION AS A CHILD AND JUST ‘ACT’ DIFFERENTLY, AS YOU ARE JUST A CHILD PRETENDING TO BE AN ADULT.
TO ACTUALLY GROW UP, SOMETHING ‘NEW’ INSIDE YOU MUST BE ‘CREATED’ ABOVE YOUR CHILDISH STATE, AT A SELF-CONSCIOUS LEVEL YOU CAN FEEL.
AS A MAN, I CALL THAT ‘BOTTLE’, BALLS, COURAGE, WHICH IS A SOLID INTERNAL FEELING YOU CAN THEN ‘USE’ TO ‘CHANGE’ YOUR ‘CHARACTER’
SEE WITH OUT BOTTLE, YOU CAN NEVER HAVE ANY CHARACTER WORTHY OF THE NAME, AS YOU ARE NEVER CONSISTENT = NO CHARACTER.
Yes, I know, YOU may well be swearing at the screen right now as YOU maybe a ‘Householder’, you may have engaged in the only remaining mechanism that enables Children to grow up in the ‘NORMAL’ circumstance of the Western world – YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR PROVIDING THE RESOURCES YOUR FAMILY NEEDS TO SURVIVE AND PROSPER. So YOU HAVE HAD TO ‘MAN UP’, force yourself to CHANGE from being a KID in order to achieve this, so to some SMALL DEGREE YOU HAVE MATURED, BECOME AN ADULT THROUGH THE PAINFUL ‘RESPONSIBILITY’ OF HAVING TO COMPETE AGAINST OTHERS FOR RESOURCES TO STOP YOUR ENVIROMENT DESTROYING WHAT YOU WANT THE MOST, YOUR BIG PICTURE – YOU have GONE AGAINST what your feckless inner child wants for itself, COMFORT, CHEAP THRILLS, DRUGS, FANTASY, PLAYTIME, you have recreated yourself to a small degree…
So YOU have a place to start with your development, YOU CAN USE THAT HARDNESS, THAT DRIVE CREATED BY THE BURDEN OF A GREATER RESPONSIBILITY THAN YOUR OWN HAPPINESS, if you only knew how to GROW THAT HARDNESS, IF YOU KNEW WHAT I MEANT BY THE WORD ‘USE’. But most of the REST OF YOU DON’T DO WELL WITH COMPETITION DO YOU, BECAUSE you are a CHILD, so your mindset is the same as a CHILD WHO WAS GIVEN WHAT THEY NEEDED AND COULD JUST PLAY AT LIFE, and so has never lost that ‘NAIVETY’, never realized THAT YOU MUST EARN, WIN OR TAKE WHAT YOU NEED IN THIS WORLD, BECAUSE THE ENVIROMENT WE LIVE IN IS ‘HOSTILE TO US’. Yes, some of you may know how to suffer and change for a GREATER GOOD, BUT MOST OF YOU ARE STILL LITTLE MORE THAN LITTLE CHILDREN, who can’t ‘COMPETE WITH THEMSELVES’ for the RESOURCES THEY SO DESPERATELY NEED TO DEVELOP THEMSELVES…
TODAY I’M GOING TO GIVE YOU THE GIFTED VERSION OF THIS, AS A PRECURSOR TO BECOMING ‘PRESENT IN YOUR PRESENCE’, IN PART 4 – I’M GOING TO GIVE YOU MORE THAN YOU NEED NOW, BECAUSE YOU WILL NEED THAT MORE LATER. See, there is a lot more to GROWING UP than you know, and its that MORE THAT WILL MAKE YOU WANT TO GROW UP, as your biggest issue is that YOU DON’T WANT TO, do you, AS NO ONE HAS TOLD YOU THIS STUFF, NO ONE HAS EXPLAINED THAT MOST WAYS OF GROWING UP INVOLVE FACING YOUR ‘CHILDISH FEARS’ of some DARK CORNER OF YOUR BEDROOM.
But, THERE ARE OTHER NAMES FOR BOTTLE, so if you are female YOU MAY PREFER TO USE ‘HEART’, as the strongest elements of your energetic body are DIFFERENT FOR MEN AND WOMEN – MEN CONNECT STRONGEST TO THEIR 1ST CENTRE, THE ‘SEX CENTRE’, WOMEN IN THEIR 2ND CENTRE, THE ‘HEART CENTRE’. Women are naturally more ENERGETICALLY developed THAN MEN, however there is no difference in the method, JUST WHERE YOU FOCUS ON AT THE START. Be warned however, much as women tend to know that LOVE MAKES THEM BRAVE, whilst it makes MEN SHY AS THEIR HEART IS MUCH WEAKER, UNDEVELOPED, they will also have a strong tendency to become passive about it, to wait for it, to think that LOVE IS THE ANSWER, THE DRUG, THE CURE – TO USE LOVE AS ‘A TEST’. THOSE ARE STUPID CULTURAL STEREOTYPES, whilst real HEART IS BRAVERY, IS HARD, IS SOLID, so don’t get lost in LOVE today, THIS IS NOT ROMANTIC, this is YOUR ‘HEART AND SOUL’ IN THE RAW.
Yes, however much you now understand we are going to USE YOUR SEXUAL ENERGY TO GROW YOU UP TODAY, know that the feeling is different between the sexes, AS SOME HIGHLY GIFTED WOMEN MAY ALREADY EXPEREINCE THEIR GIFT AS ‘HEART’ IN THEIR CHEST, THEIR SOLAR PLEXUS, given they still actually have some free sexual energy left, even if it way less than the PEAK of adolescence, when GROWING UP IS MUCH EASIER BECAUSE OF THAT PEAK, YOU STILL NEED ENOUGH TO FEEL IT EASILY, if we going to be able to use it, add to it…
See, I’M OLD SCHOOL, I RESPECT THE ANCIENT WAYS ABOVE ALL ELSE, and I know the GREEKS AND LATER THE ROMANS forced the process of ‘GROWING UP’ IN BOTH ‘ELITE’ MEN AND WOMEN AT THE NEXT LEVEL, THE ‘HEART’ LEVEL. But in the MODERN WESTERN WORLD, the DEGENERATE world of DOMESTICATED ANIMALS, men can only WORK WITH THEIR ‘BOTTLE’ EASILY, SO TO FORCE MALES PASSED THIS ONLY REALLY WORKS IF YOU ARE A SENSITIVE, HIGHLY ‘GIFTED’ MALE. But still, some of you may enjoy knowing why ELITE Romans Warriors have faces on their armor ‘breast’ plates, why the ELITE Centurions gathered in special caves to worship the ‘Sol Invictus’ they developed in their own Chests, PARTICULARLY AS THAT ANCIENT ‘RELIGION’ REMAINS THE FOUNDATION OF THE CHRISTIAN CHURCH IN THE WEST- many Churches are literally built right on top of those secret, exclusive caves, as THE GOD MITHRIDATES, THE WORSHIP OF ‘FIRE’ once ruled the civilized world to the extent THAT ITS SUCCESS IS RESPONSIBLE FOR CREATING IT, who knew, eh?
Yes, YOU MUST FEEL DIFFERENT TO GROW UP, LIKE THE ANCIENTS DID – IT MUST CHANGE YOU, EVEN CREATE A CONSCIOUS YOU AS SEPARATE TO FAKE UNCONSCIOUS YOU, that is WHAT THOSE ROMANS WHERE DOING IN THOSE CAVES, AS THEY NEEDED LOTS OF BOTTLE TO STAND AGAINST ‘THE BARBARIANS’ AT THE GATES. TRY AND GET THIS NOW – GROWING UP is not some notional idea about ‘BEING RESPONSIBLE, MATURE, DECENT’, its NOT JUST SEXUAL MATURITY, its actually a ‘THING IN ITSELF’, it exists in REALITY as a STATE OF MIND, outside of YOUR OPINION ABOUT IT, as part of EVERYONE’s CONSCIOUS ABILITIES.
Even more ‘shockingly’, 90% of what YOU are capable of THINKING, FEELING, DOING IS ONLY POSSIBLE IN THIS NEW STATE OF MIND, a child can DO NOTHING SERIOUS in the is world, A CHILD ‘PLAYS’, A CHILD IS A ‘FAN’, A CHILD IS A ‘SPECTATOR’, A CHILD NEEDS TO ‘FEEL SAFE’ above all else, SO IS GUTLESS, AGGRESSIVE, CREEPY, SECRETIVE. That is why we call you ‘BASIC’ – THE SOPHISTICATION YOU SO DESPERATELY CRAVE IS A TOTAL FANTASY, you would not know subtly if it punched you in the face – YOU ARE COARSE, VULGAR, OBVIOUS, TACKY, LOUND, DISLIKEABLE, DISAGREEABLE, DISINGENUOUS, DISLOYAL, DISFUNCTIONAL, DISLIKED, and frankly A SILLY LITTLE MESS. We wince, we wonder, we brace ourselves for YOUR next little icky YOLO statement, little cleverness, little cunning bit of your meaningless crap, whilst making sure we have a sick bag handy, cause you HAVE NO SELF AWARENESS DO YOU – YOU, THINK FOLKS KEEP YOUR SECRETS, YET THEY DELIGHT IN MAKING SURE YOUR SECRETS ARE HEADLINE NEWS, AS THEY SEEK YOUR DESTRUCTION, because you live in a ‘playground’ WHERE NOTHING REALLY MATTERS, AND NO ONE REALLY CARES, WELL… ABOUT ANYTHING REALLY.
But is it NOT JUST THAT, not just the massive range and depth of emotion you are capable of in this new state, that experiences you have only read about becomes EVERYDAY for you, see EVERYTHING IS BETTER AS AN ADULT, THE FELT EXPERIENCE OF LIFE IS BETTER, LONGER, STRONGER, DEEPER and much more important for most you – YOU BECOME LUCKIER, SIMPLY BY DRAMATICALLY LESSENING YOUR CONTINUAL BAD LUCK. And YES, that includes SEX – AS A CHILD YOU ARE ONLY CAPABLE OF TENSION SEX, ANIMAL SEX, SEX DESIGNED TO MAKE BABIES AND SELL PORN, the type of sex that drains you of your life force itself AS IT IS DESIGNED TO BE USED TO CREATE NEW LIFE, so is actually a ‘SACRIFICE’ of yourself, THE ENERGY YOU NEED ‘TO LIVE, DRIVE AND SURVIVE’ (Sorry, Blues Brothers…), WHO KNEW, EH?
BUT AN ADULT IS CAPABLE OF ENERGETIC SEX, which is a whole other thing, WAY, WAY ABOVE THE TRIVIAL ‘TENSION RELEASE OF FORCED ANIEXTY’ YOU ARE USED TO – SEX BECOMES A ‘SHARED EXPEREINCE’, NOT JUST ONE MORE LITTLE FANTASY where ‘anyone’ will do. See, for GIFTED ENERGY SEX WITH THE RIGHT PERSON, a person you HAVE ‘A CONNECTION’ TO who is AT OR ABOVE YOUR LEVEL, NEVER ACTUALLY STOPS = LOVE. Yep, A CHILD IS NOT ACTUALLY CAPABLE OF LOVE for its own sake, A CHILD THINKS LOVE IS SAFETY, OBSESSION, POSSESSION, and that ain’t LOVE folks, not even close – A CHILD THINKS ALL LOVE IS THE SAME AS PARENTAL LOVE, SO THAT IS WHAT IT CHASES…
So THE CRUCIAL BIT IS YOU MUST FEEL DIFFERENT IN YOURSELF TO GROW UP, DIFFERENT from how you felt as A CHILD, OTHERWISE YOU HAVE NOT DONE IT, and you don’t, do you – BEST WAY TO SAY IT IS THAT YOUR ‘EMOTIONAL PERSPECTIVE MUST CHANGE’ from that of a CHILD to an ADULT – A CHILD HAS VERY FEW BASELINE EMOTIONS, AS ADULT HAS MANY MORE, STRONGER AND MORE SOPHISTICATED ONES. So TO GROW UP, AFTER SEXUAL MATURITY, means YOU HAVE to ‘FORCE’ THAT DIFFERENCE, YOU MUST LEAD IT BY USING ‘FORCED SENSATION’ TO ‘EVOKE NEW EMOTION’…
IN THIS WAY YOU WILL ACTUALLY DISASSOCIATE FROM YOUR CHILDISH STATE OF MIND AT A CONSCIOUS LEVEL.
INDEED, SOME OF YOU MAY HAVE ALREADY EXPERIENCED THIS STATE, BUT YOU WERE TO SCARED TO INVESTIGATE IT.
BUT YOU MUST BE STRONG NOW, AS THIS IS WHAT THE ‘PROCESS OF CHANGING YOUR CHARACTER’ FEELS LIKE.
NO NEED TO GET SCARED THOUGH, THE SHOCK OF THE NEW WEARS OFF QUICK ENOUGH WHEN YOU KNOW WHAT IT IS…
YEP – TO START THE JOURNEY TO ‘BETTER THAN’ MUST FEEL VERY DIFFERENT TO OLD YOU. SEE, YOU are fucking useless in your current state, never the same 2 days in a row, lazy, bored and stupid, BECAUSE YOU STILL FEEL LIKE A KID, YOU STILL WANNA PLAY, FANTAZIE, INSTEAD OF ‘DO’, INSTEAD OF ‘ADVENTURE’, INSTEAD OF ‘ACHIEVEMENT’, so you still exist at some level of ‘NARCISSITIC CHILD’, as you have no choice but to be one. A CHILD HAS NO CHARACTER, so does not really exist, is of no use, as it is just a summation of what has happened to them, SO GROWING UP is the first step on all SPIRITUAL SYSTEMS – YOU MUST CHANGE.
However shocking you find this, KNOW THAT MOST SYSTEMS, even some of the big ones you have heard of, WOULD QUIETLY REGARD YOU AS ‘SUB-HUMAN’. See to them YOU ARE NOT A MAN OR A WOMAN, however old you are, you are just a KID, so you are ‘irresponsible’, you have no value, and therefore no rights, as you have not earnt them, so you are just a domesticated herd animal, CANNON FODDER – YOU HAVE NO ‘CLASS’, NO ‘SELF-AWARENESS’, you are the HERD, THE MOB, THE RABBLE, THE ‘PLEBS’, you are ‘LIVESTOCK’, INDEED SEVERAL SYSTEMS WOULD DESCRIBE YOU AS ‘THE DEAD’, OR ‘THE SLEEPING’, OR ‘THE LOST’.
Yes, GROWING UP is a BIG DEAL, UNTIL YOU HAVE DONE IT, and then its just NORMAL, much as it is the SAME END RESULT FOR EVERYONE, much as there are multiple ways to achieve it, IT IS A MILESTONE ON YOUR DEVELOPMENT AS A HUMAN BEING. A child is just a DOMESTICATED ANIMAL who only behaves themselves OUT OF FEAR, because you have NO SELF AWARNESS as a STATE OF MIND, at all, THERE IS JUST YOU ‘THE CHILD’, who ‘KNOWS NOT WHAT THEY DO’, because they are NOT AWARE OF THEMSELVES AT THE SAME TIME AS THEY ARE AWARE OF REALITY.
Yes, there is a reason that EVERY RELIGION ON THE PLANET PUTS ITS CHILDREN THROUGH ‘A RITE OF PASSAGE’, with some being very formal indeed, but its not just them, EVERY TRIBE, EVERY SOCIETY ALSO DID THIS, ONCE UPON A TIME, with all kinds of methods, rituals used IN THESE ‘COMING OF AGE’ procedures. Frankly the TRIBAL ONES WERE MORE EFFECTIVE THAN MOST, as they always relied on FORCED SHOCKS, which still happen today, AS MUCH ‘BY ACCIDENT’ AS ANYTHING ELSE, but you think ‘sexual maturity’, the change in your human BIOLOGY, your energy system, grows you up by itself, don’t you, BUT IT DOES NOT – you are just a big kid, WHO WANTS TO PLAY AT EVERYTHING, so take NOTHING SERIOUSLY, AS YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW WHAT ‘SERIOUSLY’ FUCKING MEANS….
Yes, of course, anyone can be aware of themselves for a moment, through pressure, pain, intense emotion, BUT THAT IS USELESS, BECAUE YOU ONLY HAVE 1 DIMENSION OF CONSCIOUSNESS, you only see one thing at a time, so CAN NEVER JUDGE YOURSELF, YOUR THOUGHTS, FEELINGS, REACTIONS AS SEPARATE TO YOUR CONSCIOUSNESS IN THE MOMENT. So whatever your awareness is ON in that moment of cognition actually ‘becomes you’, triggers you, overpowers you, to a greater or lesser degree as a Child, SO YOU ARE NO LONGER CONSCIOUSLY AWARE THAT YOU HAVE BEEN TAKEN OVER BY IT as a seqeunce of reactions to it, THAT YOU SIMPLY ACCEPT AS ‘WHAT YOU THINK/FEEL/DO’. See, THAT IS NOT YOU AT ALL, THAT SHIT IS JUST ‘THE NOISE OF REALITY BOUNCING OFF THE CASTLE WALLS OF YOUR EGO’, it has no value in itself TO YOU, BECAUSE IT HAS NO MEANING – YOUR RANDOM THOUGHTS ARE RANDOM GARBAGE…
‘SO WHAT THE ACTUAL ASS FUCK IS GROWING UP THEN, WHAT ACTUALLY HAPPENS’, you moan – ITS THIS, YOU TRIVIAL LITTLE BITCHES:
An ADULT has THE CAPABILITY OF 2 DIMENSIONS OF CONSCIOUS, so an adult can judge themselves IN THE MOMENT whilst ITS CONSCIOUSNESS IS SEPARATE TO ITS ‘REACTIONS TO THAT MOMENT’ without fear, however ‘sporadically’, however much they don’t know what to do with it – THEY DON’T KNOW HOW TO TURN THAT TRANSISTORY ‘2D PEAK EXPEREINCE’ INTO A STATE OF MIND, YET.
You THE CHILD waste the ENERGY YOU NEED TO MAKE THIS JUMP ON ‘BEING A CHILD’, BUT AN ADULT CAN DIRECT THEIR THOUGHT AGAINST THEIR FAKE SELF – an ADULT CAN STOP THEIR FAKE SELVES, SO AN ADULT CAN SAVE THEMSELVES, AND THEN USE WHAT THEY SAVE TO DEVELOP THEMSELVES. Its another one of those CATCH 22s on the 4th Way – A CHILD HAS NO ENERGY TO GROW UP BECAUSE IT WASTES IT ALL ON BEING A CHILD, so CHILDREN HAVE TO BE FORCED TO GROW UP, TO BE ‘SHOCKED’ INTO IT, unless they are taught how to ‘GROW THEMSELVES UP’, which is what I’m going to do for you today…
Easy so far..?
See all CHILDISHNESS IS ‘WEAKNESS’, ‘COMES FROM WEAKNESS’, IF NOT THE VERY ‘ACT OF WEAKENING YOURSELF’, THAT IS THE DEATH IN IT. As a KID you could get away with that shit, YOU HAD THE POWER TO DO IT, BUT SOMEWHERE BETWEEN 16-18 Y/OS THAT EQUATION ENDED, and now more goes out than comes in, INDEED WHEN YOUR AGE STARTS WITH A 3 OR MORE ITS A HELL OF A LOT MORE GOING OUT. But an ADULT knows this, as they feel the energy exchange in the moment of life, SO AN ADULT VALUES STRENGTH, ENERGY MORE THAN IT VALUES FUN. Indeed an Adult knows its MUST SEEK OUT CHALLENGE IN ORDER TO BUILD ITS STRENGTH AGAINST, IN ORDER TO BE STRONG against ‘the shit’ IN ORDER TO HAVE FUN, OTHERWISE ITS CONSCIOUS POWER IS SIMPLY ‘ASLEEP’, whilst a GIFTED CHILD RUNS FROM THE CHALLENGES ITS CONSCEINCE CONTINUES, EVER SO DESPERATELY NOW, TO PUT IN ITS LIFE TO HELP IT. 2D CONSCIOUSNESS ‘BUILDS YOU’, 1D CONSCIOUSNESS ‘BLEEDS’ YOU…
Yep, THE IRONY OF CHILD, eh – YOU CHASE YOUR BASIC, YOUR FANTASIES, YOUR OVER THINKING as a cure FOR ANXIETY, yet they make you weaker and weaker, so you become EVEN MORE ANXIOUS, SO YOU DO THEM MORE AND MORE UNTIL THEY NO LONGER WORK, AND YOU EITHER GO TO THE DOCTOR OR BECOME A FREAK SHOW, lost in you own personal little hell of EXTREMES. Yes, A CHILD, YOU becomes INCREASINGLY FORGETFUL, FRIDGE BLIND, SLOW, CLUMSY, LAZY, FECKLESS, TOXIC, and sort of BAD LUCK ON LEGS, cursing every enterprise they touch, YET THEY TELL THEMSELVES THAT NONE OF THAT MATTERS, ALL OF THAT IS FINE, BECAUSE THEY ARE COOL, CLEVER, RIGHT, HOT, so everything is ok for another day, hour, few seconds. In the end you are TOTALLY DEPENDENT, like a dog who learnt that all it has to do is wag its tail for snacks, do tricks, run after the ball, be a good girl, rather than the CAT you are supposed to be, WHO EXPECTS ADORATION AS NORMAL, and usually ignores it BECAUSE IT KNOWS ITS ONLY THE ADORATION FROM THOSE ‘BETTER THAN’ THEM THAT CAN HELP THEM, BUILD THEM, all else takes their energy and flushes it straight down the drain, FOR NO POINT, NO VALUE, so can just fuck off…
BUT THAT NOT YOU IS IT, YOU ARE NO WHERE NEAR THAT BAD, YOUR NOT SOME ‘CAR CRASH PILL HEAD’ OR SOME DESPERATE CREATURE COWERING IN THE CORNER ALL ALONE, hell… you have a whole group of PEOPLE WHO THINK YOU ARE NORMAL, that how you tell you are ok, so IT DOES NOT MATTER YOU CAN’T REALLY REMEMBER WHAT HAPPENED YESTERDAY, look, see, YOUR world LOOKS NORMAL BECAUSE YOU ARE MAKING IT UP, YOU TOOL.
So why am I going to put ‘YOU’ through my version of this RITE OF PASSAGE, from a CHILD to an ADULT – I mean who the fuck do I think I am to presume you bitches even need this, eh, YOUR READING ABOUT DEVELOPMENT, YOU HAVE LOADS OF LIFE EXPERIENCE, DON’T YOU, you think you ARE A GROWN UP, not some trivial little creature trapped in your BASIC PETTY PATTERNS, SELF DESTRUCTIVE REACTIONS, AND CHRONIC OVER THINKING?
So FIRST, KNOW THAT this is NOT ABOUT US ‘JUDGING YOU’, all high and mighty in our IVORY CASTLE, see we DON’T BLAME YOU FOR WHAT YOU HAVE BECOME, EVEN FOR YOUR CREEPY, OUT OF CONTROL ‘BASIC’, as frankly MINE (and many others on this path) makes yours look like the PETTY COMFORTS of one more little LOST SOUL, one more ‘GOOD GIRL GONE BAD’, with a level of BASIC that frankly goes unnoticed by anyone BUT YOU, whilst inspiring little more than PITY, and THE LAUGTHER OF YOUR ‘FRIENDS’, of course. See, at your LEVEL, all talk of good and bad is meaningless, you are just a collection of reactions with NO SOUL – YOU’RE A PUPPET, only your CONSCIENCE CAN JUDGE THAT MESS.
But… if you want to GROW UP ‘YOU’ MUST LEARN TO ‘JUDGE YOURSELF AT THE MOMENT OF DECISION’, CONSCIOUSLY, AS A BASELINE STATE, so you must THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU WANNA DO, WHAT YOU WANNA SAY BECAUSE OF HOW YOU FEEL, if you want to KNOW what your life is ABOUT, ‘THE POINT OF YOU’, YOUR ‘MANIFEST DESTINY’. Right now YOU CAN’T, YOU CAN ONLY JUDGE YOURSELF ‘AFTERWARDS’, and that is no fucking use to anyone – THE WORLD IS FULL OF 1 DIMENSIONAL BASIC BITCHES LOOKING FOR THE NEXT GOOD TIME, ALL BORED OFF THEIR TITS, ALL ANXIOUSLY WAITING FOR SOMETHING TO HAPPEN TO THEM SO THEY CAN FEEL LIKE THEY EXIST FOR A MIN OR 2, its the never ending awfulness of the petty existence of a slave, all ‘DAZED AND CONFUSED’.
But to JUDGE YOURSELF AT THE TIME TAKES SOME LEVEL OF 2D CONSCIOUSNESS, WHICH IS WHERE THE BOTTLE BIT COMES IN, AS THAT WILL GIVE YOU THE ENERGY YOU NEED TO DO IT, and it works surprisingly quickly, if you can be bothered TO TRY…
YOU MUST ‘JUDGE YOURSELF’ AGAINST SOMETHING ‘MORE’, IF YOU WANT MORE THAN THE SHITTY LITTLE EXISTENCE OF A DOMESTICATED ANIMAL.
BUT THAT ‘MORE’ IS NOT SOME DRY ‘STANDARD’, SOME ‘VALUE’ LEADING TO A ‘FUTURE BENEFIT’ – YOUR FAKE EMOTIONS WILL JUST CRUSH IT.
YOU MUST LEARN TO JUDGE YOURSELF AGAINST YOUR FELT ‘BOTTLE’, BECAUSE IT FEELS ‘BETTER THAN’ YOUR ‘CHILDISH EMOTIONS’…
KNOW AS A CHILD YOU ARE A ‘CREATURE OF FEELING’, NOT REASON, SO YOU MUST USE A BETTER FEELING AGAINST YOUR FAKE ONES TO CHANGE.
YES, YOUR BOTTLE MUST BE STRONGER THAN YOUR THAN YOUR PATTERN REACTION, SO YOU MUST PUT ENERGY INTO THAT BOTTLE TO MAKE IT STRONGER, SO IN TIME YOU SIDE WITH YOUR ‘BOTTLE’, NOT YOUR REACTIONS BECAUSE YOU WANT TO FEEL ‘BETTER THAN’.
SEE THAT ‘CONFLICTION’ MANY OF YOU ALREADY FEEL IS A GOOD THING, ITS JUST THAT YOU HAVE BEEN PICKING THE WRONG SIDE FOR YEARS – YOU HAVE BEEN PICKING THE EASY, EMPTY SIDE, NOT THE ‘BETTER THAN’ SIDE, BECAUSE NO ONE HAS SHOWN YOU HOW TO MAKE IT STRONGER.
AND ONCE YOU HAVE ‘THE BOTTLE’ TO DO IT, ‘ACTING’ AS AN ADULT BECOMES VERY EASY INDEED – VIRTU IS ITS OWN, FELT REWARD = POWER.
IF YOU GO ON ACTING LIKE A CHILD, WHERE YOUR ONLY REAL GOAL IS TO MURDER YOUR CONSCIENCE IN ITS SLEEP = POWERLESS.
See IF YOU DON’T START TO JUDGE YOURSELF, THE GOOD, THE BAD AND THE DOWNRIGHT UGLY VIA GROWING UP, THEN YOU CAN NEVER CREATE A ‘YOU’ AS SOMETHING SOLID INSIDE OF YOU THAT CAN DIRECT CHANGE – A CHILD has no CONSCIOUS ‘MIDDLE’ OF CONSEQEUNCE, BETWEEN YOUR HIGHER AND LOWER SELVES, so you can NEVER CHANGE, you are never self-conscious enough to SEE ANYTHING ABOUT YOURSELF, let alone stand against it. Simply put, A CHILD LIKE YOU has NO CONSEQEUNCE, because a CHILD SIMPLY DOES WHAT THEY ARE TOLD, DOES WHAT IS EASY, DOES WHAT REDUCES THEIR ANXIETY, BECAUSE A CHILD HAS NO ‘BOTTLE’ SO CAN ONLY REPEAT THEMSELVES.
WORSE, A CHILD NEVER ‘DECIDES’ ANYTHING ONCE AND FOR ALL, THEIR LIFE ‘JUST HAPPENS TO THEM’, they make no conscious choice, at all, THEY ARE JUST ONE MORE PUPPET OF FORCES THEY DON’T EVEN SEE, LET ALONE UNDERSTAND. SO YOU MUST SEE THIS CLEARLY, SEE WHAT ‘GROWING UP’ MEANS FOR ‘YOU’, as right now YOU DON’T HAVE A SCOOBIE FUCKING DOO – YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND THAT THE CONSCIOUSNESS OF A CHILD HAS NO EFFECT ON WHAT HAPPENS TO THEM, IT IS SIMPLY A SPECTATOR TO YOUR OWN LITTLE FREAK SHOW, yet YOU THINK YOU MATTER, YOU ARE WORTH IT, BUT IN REALITY YOU ARE JUST A MOMENTARY SNAPSHOT OF ‘YOUR CONSTANT, QUIETY DESPERATE LITTLE REACTIONARY THOUGHTS’, LIKE ALL THE OTHER CHILDREN ARE…
Now, I WILL TAKE A MOMENT HERE TO BREAK FROM THE CLASSIC TRADITION AND TELL YOU THE TRUTH – GROWING UP IS NOT FOR EVERYONE, BUT IF YOU ARE GIFTED ‘YOU HAVE TO DO IT’, OTHERWISE YOUR GIFT WILL BECOME A CURSE, AS YOUR POWER DECLINES. Yes, GROWING UP IS REQUIRED TO DEVELOP YOURSELF, but it is more than that, SEE IF YOU ARE A GROWN UP YOU ARE ‘RESPONSIBLE’ FOR WHAT YOU DO CONSCIOUSLY, AS YOU ARE NO LONGER BEING CONNED IN TO DOING IT, you will see all your petty evils, how you run toward self-destruction and away from help, away from what ‘YOU NEED’, away from your hearts desire, even though YOU THE CHILD THINKS YOU RUN TOWARD ‘HAPPINESS’, ‘SAFETY’, ‘SECURITY’.
See once you have GROWN UP, YOU ARE ‘ON THE CLOCK’, everything you do matters, BECAUSE YOU DO IT CONSCIOUSLY, it’s not a con anymore, and you will SEE YOUR ‘CHILD LIKE HAPPPINESS’ FOR THE SIMPLY REDUCTION OF ANXIETY IT IS – CONSCIOUS CHOICE HAS A PRICE, A COST TO YOU IN THE MOMENT OF DOING IT, FOR YOUR OWN GOOD OR YOUR OWN ILL. Try and remember this, even if you don’t understand it yet, understand what it means for GIFTED folk, indeed that you STILL DON’T understand why I am trying to help ‘YOU’ specifically – YOU ARE KILLING YOURSELF MUCH FASTER THAN YOU COULD EVER IMAGINE, but you will only ever see that, FEEL THAT, IF YOU GROW UP.
So our answer ‘TO WHY’ is EASY – WE, ALL OFF US HERE ON THE 4TH WAY WHO HAVE SOME DECENT ‘LEVEL OF BEING’, HAVE ‘HAD TO’ GROW UP, we have all HAD TO DO IT BEFORE WE DESTROYED OURSELVES – THAT IS WHY WE HAVE ‘THE RANK’ WE HAVE. Without it many of us would already be DEAD, including me – SO DON’T FEEL BAD FOR STILL BEING A CHILD, just know that you are wasting YOUR TIME AND MINE BY TRYING TO DEVELOP YOURSELF AS ONE. FRANKLY, EVEN TALKING TO YOU IS A WASTE OF TIME, you have the conscious level of a ‘wind up toy’ BECAUSE THERE IS ‘NOTHING’ INSIDE YOU TO ‘TALK TO’, NOTHING FOR MY WORDS TO HIT, TO SHOCK, NOTHING ‘TO CRYSTALLIZE’, hell for some of you even your 1D Consciousness is a flakey, passing, drug addled phase…
GROWING UP IS THE NUMBER 1 REASON THAT SOME PEOPLE CAN DEVELOP THEMSELVES, BUT MOST PEOPLE CAN’T, NO MATTER HOW GIFTED THEY ARE…
SEE YOU MUST GROW UP IN ORDER TO DEVELOP YOURSELF – YOU MUST LEARN ‘HOW TO CHANGE’ BEFORE YOU ‘CAN CHANGE’, AGAIN AND AGAIN.
SADLY THE MODERN 4TH WAY VERSION OF THIS, TO ‘REMEMBER YOURSELF’, SUCKS ASS AND DOES NOT WORK FOR 99% OF FOLK WHO TRY IT.
SO I USE MY WAY, TO DEVELOP YOUR ‘BOTTLE’, WHICH ACTUALLY IS THE BEST WAY TO REMEMBER THE SENSE OF YOURSELF, INSTEAD.
BUT FOR THIS TO WORK I HAVE TO EXPLAIN IT TO YOU ‘HARD’, AS YOU HAVE TO UNDERSTAND WHY YOU ‘DON’T WANT’ TO DO IT…
Not that I intend to insult the classic 4th Way Canon of course, the issue is in the translation from Russian that is ‘Remembering Yourself’ and PD Ouspenkys style of using it as a ‘test’ for Grown Ups, rather than teaching ‘how to grow up’ – THEY ARE FROM BACK IN THE DAY, BECAUSE BACK THEN MOST FOLKS HAD TO GROW UP AS PART OF THEIR CLASS STRUCTURE, SO THEY DID NOT NEED TO FOCUS ON THIS. Therefore they load WAY TO MUCH INTO THEIR VERSION FOR YOU TO COPE WITH, way to much for you to REMEMBER BECAUSE YOU CAN’T AT AN ANIMAL LEVEL, so you just get lost in it – YOU MISS THE POINT OF SELF-CONSCIOUSNESS, THE REAL MEANING OF IT BECAUSE YOU HAVE NOWHERE ‘TO START’, so don’t understand even the basics, THAT DENYING YOURSELF CHILDISH THINGS FREES UP THE ENERGY YOU ‘NEED’ TO GROW UP, TO ‘EMPOWER YOUR CONSCIOUSNESS’.
The issue is that THEY get you to try and do an abstract mental exercise with no goal, that you don’t now how to do SO CONTINUALLY HAVE TO USE YOUR EGO TO THINK ABOUT HOW TO DO, AS YOU ARE TRYING TO DO IT, AND SO FAIL TO DO IT, whilst simply waiting to stumble upon some spiritual experience OUT OF THE BLUE you will probably never have, and therefore never REMEMBER how to find the correct way back to said experience, so seems kinda flawed to me, like. Yet all the current devotees of the RUSSIAN 4th Way, of which there are tens of thousands in this world working away in their secret little groups all wonder why it never caught on? I say give it a few months, you will quit like all the rest – YOU WILL ‘ALWAYS’ FAIL THIS LEVEL OF TEST AS YOU THINK IT’S ‘UNREASONABLE’ AT YOUR LEVEL, you don’t get that ‘impossible’ is a LEVEL THING, SO I HAVE TO GIVE YOU A BETTER CHANCE AT THIS, A CHANCE WHERE YOU UNDERSTAND ITS YOUR THOUGHTS ABOUT IT THAT ARE ACTUALLY STOPPING YOU DOING IT…
TODAY I HAVE TO DUMB THIS RITE OF PASSAGE DOWN TO YOUR LEVEL OF UNDERSTANDING SO YOU ‘WANT TO DO IT’.
I MAKE NO APOLOGIES FOR THIS, AS MOST OF YOU HAVE NO CHANCE WITHOUT IT – YOU DON’T WANT TO DO ANYTHING DIFFERENT.
SO YOU MUST GET, THAT RIGHT NOW, SITTING THERE, READING THIS, THAT THERE IS SOMETHING ‘HORRIBLY WRONG WITH YOU’ = YOU’RE ‘EMPTY’.
SEE MANY OF THE GIFTED AMONGST YOU ALREADY KNOW THIS, AS MANY OF YOU ALREADY STRUGGLE WITH ‘THE EMPTINESS’ OF BEING A CHILD – THE LONLINESS CREATED BY THERE BY ‘NOTHING THERE’ BUT THE ECHOS OF CHILDHOOD HABITS, PATTERNS OF REACTION, MEMORIES, FANTASIES.
BUT IT MAKES NO DIFFERENCE, AS YOU ARE STUCK BEING A CHILD, REPEATING YOURSELF, DAY IN, DAY OUT, BECAUSE YOU HAVE NO CHOICE…
SEE RIGHT NOW THERE IS NO POINT TELLING YOU THE VIKINGS WHERE RIGHT, THE BRAVE DO ‘LIVE FOREVER IN THE HALLS OF VALHALLA’, CAUSE YOU ARE NOT BRAVE, ARE YOU, YOU HAVE MASTERED THE ‘OPPOSITE’ TO BRAVE – YOU ARE ‘CREEPY’.
SO YOU MUST ACCEPT NOW, BEFORE READING ON, THAT YOUR CHILDLIKE NORMAL IS A STATE OF ‘EXISTENTIAL DREAD’, OF FEAR OF EXISTENCE ITSELF, BUT THERE IS A MUCH BETTER NORMAL WAITING FOR THOSE WHO HAVE THE ‘BOTTLE’ TO CHANGE. Yes, I know you don’t feel this state every second of every day BECAUSE YOU USE YOUR COMFORTS TO REPRESS IT, but trust me AS A CHILD IT DOMINATES YOU, because you have made your current NASTY LITTLE EXISTENCE INTO A STABLE PLACE TO LIVE, its something you can cope with, at least whilst you are relatively young and can cope with the DAY TO DAY ‘LOSS’…
SO YOU MUST SEE WHAT DEFINES YOU AS A THIS ‘DREADFUL’ CHILD IS YOUR ADDICTION TO ‘ANIMAL COMFORTS’, YOUR ‘BASIC’, ‘OBLIVION’, AS IT IS THE CLASSIC ‘REACTION’ TO LIVING IN YOUR INFERIORITY COMPLEX, TO THE ‘NOTHINGNESS’ IN YOUR SOUL.
BUT YOU CAN NOT FACE YOUR EXISTENCE WITHOUT THESE ANIMAL COMFORTS, CAN YOU, SO YOU MUST REPLACE THEM WITH OTHER COMFORTS BEFORE YOU CAN LEARN TO CHANGE, AS THAT IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT IS, GROWTH THROUGH TRADING UP, IT IS NOT A PROCESS OF DENIAL AS THAT FAILS.
TODAY YOU MUST SEE THIS CLEARLY – THE ONLY THING THAT IS STOPPING YOU CHANGING IS THE GUTLESS CHILD IN YOU, BECAUSE THAT CHILD CONVINCES YOU ‘YOUR BASIC’ IS ‘THE ONLY COMFORT’ FOR BEING NOTHING, WHEN IN REALITY THOSE COMFORTS ‘MAKE YOU NOTHING’.
YET HOWEVER MUCH YOU REPLACE ONE THING WITH ANOTHER TODAY AS ENABLER, YOU MUST SEE THAT BEING AN ADULT IS ABOUT ‘THE STYLE’ OF HOW YOU SPEND YOUR MENTAL TIME, THE ‘MENTAL STATE’ YOU SPEND YOUR TIME ‘IN’, WHICH DEFINES WHAT YOU SPEND YOUR TIME ‘ON’.
THE KEY DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A CHILD AND AN ADULT IS HOW YOU FEEL MOMENT TO MOMENT, YOUR STATE OF NORMAL, WHICH IS A SIMPLE CHOICE BETWEEN THE ‘QUIET DESPERATION’ OF YOUR ‘INFERIORITY’, AND THE LUXURIOUS ‘POWER’ OF YOUR ‘SUPERIORITY’, YOUR ‘BOTTLE’, COURAGE.
SEE THE GREATEST TRICK TO GROWING UP – TO ACT LIKE AN ADULT – IS THE MOST MISSUNDERSTOOD, AS TO ‘ACT’ LIKE AN ADULT MEANS YOU MUST DEVELOP ‘YOUR BOTTLE’ AS THAT ACT, AS A ‘FELT STATE OF MIND’ BECAUSE THIS WILL GROW YOU THE FUCK UP ALL BY ITSELF…
BUT RIGHT NOW YOU DON’T ANY OF THAT, SIMPLY BECAUSE THERE IS SOMETHING WRONG WITH YOU – YOU HAVE NEVER GROWN UP.
YES – GET IT – YOU HAVE TO UNDERSTAND THAT BEING A CHILD AS AN ADULT MEANS THERE IS ‘SOMETHING WRONG’ WITH YOU, ‘YOU’ ARE DEGNERATE, SCATTERED, EMPTY, LOST, but you think that is NORMAL, BECAUSE YOU HAVE MADE IT NORMAL, SO YOU FEEL FINE IN YOURSELF, and just copy everyone else, SO EVERYTHING, INCLUDING DEVELOPING YOUR GIFT, REMAINS ‘A FANTASY’, AT ‘ARMS LENGTH’, ‘IN THE FUTURE’, ‘A HOBBY’, more ‘NOTHING’, THAT COMES TO NOTHING, BECAUSE IT IS NOTHING IN YOUR CHILDISH STATE OF MIND. Literally NOTHING WORKS FOR A CHILD, its all random chance…
Easy conceptually I know, BECAUSE I’VE MADE IT EASY, but sadly OVER THE YEARS GROWNG UP HAS BECOME ONE OF THE GREATEST TESTS IN ALL MODERN SPIRITUAL SYSTEMS, yet it is simply about BOTTLE, SAND, COURAGE, WHICH SOME PEOPLE ARE SIMPLY ‘SHOCKED’ INTO HAVING AS CHILDREN, if they are lucky. But now its above what even MODERN ZEN expects of you, SO MODERN FOLKS DON’T HAVE A FUCKING PRAYER OF DOING ANYTHING AT THAT LEVEL OF ‘COMMITMENT’ – you need this SIMPLE AS FUCK, don’t you. So here it is, A VERSION THAT EVEN YOU CAN DO EASILY, GIVEN I CAN MAKE YOU WANT TO DO IT, as that is the hard bit – to want to do it enough that you remember to DO IT ALL THE MOTHERFUCKING TIME, as unlike US, YOU CAN SIMPLY CHOOSE ‘NOT TO DO IT’ AND LIVE IN A FANTASY WORLD = YOUR EMPTY LIFE AS A LAZY, FECKLESS, INCREASINGLY MENTALLY ILL LITTLE CHILD.
So lets start the Intro shall we, lots to cover off, BUT BEFORE WE START PLEASE BE WARNED – DON’T SKIM THIS, THINKING ‘OF COURSE’, ITS SUPER SIMPLE, YOU ALREADY KNOW IT, you have kinda grown up already, BECAUSE TRUST ME, YOU DON’T KNOW THIS, AND YOU HAVE NOT GROWN UP…
So, this is a ZEN version of GROWING UP, where we give you an understandable process with a distinct short-term goal that adds value to your life, that is explained in both classic and modern language and DEFINED AS WHAT IT ACTUALLY IS BY WHAT IS ACTUALLY DOES – GROWING THE FUCK UP by DEVELOPING YOUR BOTTLE, so is way more effective for most. In this way the PROCESS BECOMES THE GOAL, whilst delivering a benefit you can both ‘feel’ and ‘use’ in everyday life QUICKLY – YOU BECOME MUCH MORE CONFIDENT, AS THAT IS HOW BOTTLE, BRAVERY MANIFESTS IN YOU ‘CONSCIOUSLY’.
See BOTTLE in the sense I use it is not aggressive or self assertive, as both of those are Bravery as a reaction to FEAR and/or DESIRE, and are just more of the animal states OF A CHILD so your BOTTLE must be extracted from them to work for YOU, whilst NATURAL Self-Confidence is A VERY POWERFUL STATE, above these animal ones, hence why everyone finds it so ATTRACTIVE. See, NATURAL SELF CONSCIOUSNESS AS CONFIDENCE IS NOT A REACTION, IT IS THERE ALL THE BLOODY TIME, when you have it – CONFIDENCE IS A TYPE OF ‘EMOTIONAL MOOD MUSIC’, SO IS ‘A STATE OF MIND’, not REACTIVE THOUGHT, as when you are CONFIDENT YOU DON’T CARE ABOUT REACTIVE THOUGHT, YOU CARE ABOUT WHAT YOU WANT AS A ‘BIG PICTURE’.
Yes, CONFIDENCE IS AN ENABLER OF DOING, RATHER THAN REACTING – CONFIDENCE GIVES YOU THE POWER TO ‘CONSCIOUSLY DO’ AGAINST FAKE YOU’S ‘UNCONSCIOUS REACTIONS’ WHICH YOU ALREADY KNOW DON’T FUCKING WORK SO WELL. YOU HAVE THE ABILITY TO CHECK THOSE REACTIONS FOR ‘SENSE’ AND ‘DECIDE WHAT YOU DO’ NEXT AGAINST WHAT ‘MATTERS TO YOU’ IN THE BIG PICTURE RATHER THAN ‘TRIVIAL EMOTIONAL MOMENT’, so is almost always NOT what you ‘want to do’, not what you ‘used to do’, not what you ‘expect to happen’, at the start – SO YOU STOP YOUR REACTION AND CHANGE.
CONFIDENCE IS THE ‘POWER TO COPE’ WITH WHATEVER HAPPENS, EVEN TO COPE WHEN YOU DON’T KNOW WHATS GOING TO HAPPEN, because your LIFE IS AN ADVENTURE not a TRIAL. See for the Gifted Aristos YOU DON’T GIVE A FUCK WHATEVER HAPPENS, ABOUT WHAT THE TEDIOUS LITTLE ANIMALS THINK = ELITISM, THE GREATEST SHORT CUT IN ALL DEVELOPMENT, SHOULD YOU EVER DEVELOP THE BALLS TO DO IT. YOU ARE A DEMI-GODDESS IN TRAINING, WHATEVER ELSE HAPPENS IN YOUR LIFE JUST ‘HAPPENS’, ROLL WITH IT AND MOVE ON, ITS USEFUL OR USELESS TO YOU, TREAT IT ACCORDINGLY.
BUT you don’t need that BADASS to GROW UP – ALL YOU NEED IS TO DIRECT YOUR THOUGHT ONTO YOUR BOTTLE AS A SENSE OF YOURSELF, BECAUSE IT FEELS BETTER THAN BEING A COWARD, BEING INFERIOR. This is the GENIUS OF IT, ALL ELSE FOLLOWS LATER BECAUSE ALL ELSE GETS WAY EASIER WHEN YOU HAVE GROWN UP AND CAN CHANGE TO FEELING BETTER, to FEELING SUPERIOR INSTEAD OF INFERIOR, INSTEAD OF THE EMPTY NOTHINGNESS OF A CHILD, YOUR CURRENT NORMAL, WHICH ACTUALLY FEELS LIKE TOTAL SHIT, AND IS WHY YOU ARE FOREVER TRYING TO ESCAPE IT WITH CHEAP THRILLS!
BE CLEAR, YOUR NORMAL, THE NORMAL OF A CHILD IS THE LITTLE DIFFERENT FROM THE NORMAL OF A ‘FRIGHTENED RABBIT’.
EVERYTHING YOU ARE, EVERYTHING YOU DO, EVERYTHING YOU WANT COMES FROM THIS SHITTY LITTLE NORMAL.
SO ITS TIME TO CHANGE YOUR NORMAL TO THAT OF AN ADULT, OTHERWISE ALL ATTEMPTS AT CHANGE ARE A FANTASY.
IF YOU DON’T GROW UP YOUR ATTEMPTS AT DEVELOPMENT FIT INTO THE SAME FANTASY OF JUST ‘THINKING ABOUT IT’, AND THEN TELL YOURSELF THAT BECAUSE YOU KNOW IT NOW THEN YOU HAVE DONE IT, WHICH IS ONE OF THE WORST, MOST CHILDISH TRAPS – YOU HAVE NOT DONE SHIT, HAVE YOU…
The key is THIS METHOD STOPS YOU THINKING ABOUT THE ABC OF THE PROCESS AS YOU DO THE PROCESS, and you understand YOU ONLY HAVE TO ‘THINK ABOUT THE SENSATION OF BOTTLE’, SO IT FEELS ‘BETTER THAN’, AS THE WHOLE PROCESS, SO THERE IS NO THINKING AS A ‘COMMENTARY’, OF MENTAL JUDGEMENTS. YES, THE FEELING JUST ‘IS’, AND THE EXERCISE IS TO ‘DEEPEN IT’ BY FEELING IT MORE, MAKING IT FEEL BETTER, AND BETTER, SO IT BECOMES MORE AND MORE SOLID, UNSHAKEABLE, AS FOR GIFTED TYPES IT TURNS INTO AN ‘EMOTION’ VIA EVOKING THE SENSATION = RINZAI ZEN. And you don’t even have to MEDITATE, which is great as in your current state of mind YOU CAN NEVER MEDITATE CORRECTLY, you just go to sleep, WHILST ‘KIDDING’ YOURSELF YOU ARE ONE MORE TRENDY LITTLE BORN AGAIN BUDDHIST, whilst actually being a totally fake twat. At your current level all UNCONSCIOUS THINKING is FAKE YOU, IS RANDOM PATTERN MATCHING YOU CAN NOT TRUST…
Winner Winner, Chicken Dinner eh… See, THIS PROCESS WILL CAUSE YOU TO ‘REMEMBER YOURSELF’ MUCH MORE ‘IN THE NOW’, AS YOU WILL RETAIN SOME AWARENESS OF YOURSELF AS YOU EXPEREINCE OTHER SENSORY TYPES OF AWARENESS, much as you CAN NOT THINK AT THE SAMETIME at the start because your self-awareness will evaporate THE MOMENT YOU THINK, SO LEARN TO SHUT YOUR MIND THE FUCK UP BY SIMPLY IGNORING IT. But that is easy after a while, as retaining some awareness, some self consciousness will mean you will start to see what you are actually thinking PRIOR TO YOUR SENSIBLE THOUGHTS STARTING, your pattern reaction to it, and therefore will be amazed to see how much of THOUGHT TRIGGERS ARE simply ‘look there’, or random bodily sensation, or random song playing in your head, or any one of millions of possible random THOUGHT TRIGGERS OF NO VALUE TO YOU WHATSOEVER – A CHILDS THOUGHT TRIGGERS ARE INVISIBLE, HIDDEN BEHIND SHIT, SO YOU MUST START TO TRY AND SEE THEM IF YOU WANT TO GROW UP.
This works because you are no longer accepting unconscious THOUGHT AS TRUTH, you DOUBT IT, because you are NOW CONSCIOUSLY DIRECTING YOUR THOUGHTS BY DOING THE PRACTISE – YOU REJECT UNCONSCIOUS THOUGHT AS THE MEANNGLESS LITTLE WASTE OF ENERGY IT IS VIA TESTING IT FOR USEFULNESS TO ‘YOU IN THE NOW’. This is what Zen folks call being BEFORE THOUGHT, and is a very powerful state of UNDERSTANDING, yet comparatively easy to do when you know you need to stop thinking SHIT by killing your PATTERN TRIGGERS AT THE START. You will also be amazed to discover just how much other IMPORTANT DAY TO DAY STUFF you remember when you START TO REMEMBER THE SENSE OF YOURSELF, IN TERMS OF YOUR BOTTLE, when you are IN ‘THE STATE OF BEFORE THOUGHT’. Many GIFTED types already experience this state, but think it is simple DISASSOCIATION, a form of mental illness, BUT IT IS NOT, IT IS ONE OF THE GREATEST DOORWAYS IN ALL ZEN WHEN YOU KNOW WHAT IT IS FOR – TO DEVELOP YOUR BOTTLE.
See GROWING UP IN THIS SENSE allows you to do one of the greatest of all ZEN TRICKS – SAY ‘NO’ TO YOURSELF EASILY, BECAUSE YOU REALIZE WHERE YOUR THOUGHTS HAVE COME FROM AS REACTIONS, YOU SEE THE CHILDISHNESS OF IT. It is truly shocking when it happens, THAT THE VAST MARJORITY OF YOUR THOUGHTS AS REACTIONS COME FROM RANDOM CRAP OF NO IMPORTANCE, that is simply a trigger, SO IGNORING THESE TRIGGERS IS MUCH EASIER AND LEADS TO IGNORING YOUR UNCONSCIOUS, UNBIDDEN THOUGHTS, which are obviously of no value – GET USED OT ASKING ‘WHY AM I THINKING THIS SHIT, THIS FANTASY, THIS FEAR, THIS DESIRE, THIS ‘EMPTY NOTHINGNESS ABOUT SOME SHIT THAT JUST HAPPENED THAT I HAVE NO INTEREST IN’, AND JUST GO BACK TO FEELING BOTTLE INSTEAD.
LETS KEEP THE PACE UP NOW AS THERE IS SOME HARDER THINKING STUFF COMING – ALL GOOD, READY FOR THE DETAIL NOW?
SPECIFICALLY DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU ARE GOING TO DO NOW IN ORDER TO GROW UP AS A CONCEPT, AS OFTEN AS YOU CAN, ALL THE TIME, EVERY DAY, WHENEVER YOU DON’T HAVE TO THINK ABOUT SOME CRAP TO MAINTAIN YOURSELF IN THIS WORLD?
Great, but HONESTLY I kinda doubt that, I’D SAY MANY OF YOU ARE GOING TO SCREAM LIKE LITTLE FREAKS ABOUT THIS, given that you are most likely a fragile little FUCK UP, so BUCKLE UP BABY, stay with me now – SEE, YOU are READING about CHARACTER CHANGE, maybe even trying to DEVELOP yourself BUT as a FECKLESS CHILD, A HOPELESS MESS WHO CAN’T COMMIT TO SHIT, let alone anything that threatens their precious ‘comforters’ – I know it’s not all of you, but it’s MOST OF YOU, and frankly, I’m slightly over the WHINING. Yes, you whine don’t you, CAUSE WHINNING LEADS TO COMFORTING YOURSELF LIKE A BITCH…
So today I’m going to explain IN DETAIL one of the FUNDAMENTALS OF BEING ALIVE, that most of you seem to have missed, HOWEVER UNDERSTANDABLY, as YOU HAVE BEEN LET DOWN BY A SOCIETY THAT ‘BABIES YOU’, allowing you to actually FAKE growing up, whilst still LIVING IN A ‘CHILDISH STATE OF MIND’. Nothing has changed in YOUR SOUL SINCE YOU WERE 10 Y/OS, YOU ARE STILL ‘AN INNOCENT’ in our world BECAUSE YOU STILL FEEL EMPTY, YOU HAVE NO CONSCIOUS ‘SENSE OF YOURSELF’ AS A REFERENCE = A CHILD. EVERYTHNG HITS TOO HARD AS A CHILD, YOU CAN NEVER DO ANYTHING BUT REPEAT YOURSELF BECAUSE ‘YOU HAVE TO REACT’ IN THE SAME OLD WAY, SO YOU CAN NEVER CHANGE, YOU HAVE NEVER LEARNT HOW TO CHANGE, HOW TO ‘CHANGE WHAT YOU WANT’ AS A PRIORITY IN YOUR LIFE, so you don’t even have priorities, do you, AS WHAT IS THE POINT OF THEM FOR A CHILD…
Yep, its ‘THAT SIMPLE’ THEORECTICALLY, AND SADLY FOR MANY OF YOU ‘THAT HARD’ IN PRACTISE, because you have left this way too late for it to ‘be easy’, like it was for many of us, as we NEVER HAD A CHOICE, ‘we’ were ‘thrown in the deep end’, we ‘swam or sank’, BUT YOU MISSED THAT BIT DID YOU NOT, so your kinda FUCKED now – YOU ARE GONNA HAVE TO ‘TRY’…. LOL, I know, the HORROR OF THAT WORD, you wail – ‘can I not just take a pill, I MEAN SURELY SOMEONE HAS FIGURED THAT OUT BY NOW, I don’t have to win some FIGHT TO THE DEATH OR DEVELOP MY BOTTLE CONSCIOUSLY IN THIS DAY AND AGE DO I’? Sadly, YES YOU DO, CAUSE YOU ‘BOTTLED IT’ AS A CHILD. (See what I did there…)
See, GROWING UP IS NOT SOME MYSTERIOUS THING, it is well understood, enshrined in most Religions as a ‘RITE’ you need to do to ‘PASS’, but then you don’t have ANY Religion, do you, NOT THAT YOU ARE AWARE OF, anyway – SO YOU HAVE NEVER PASSED ANYTHING. But many GIFTED, WITH A STRONG AESTHETIC SENSE, find some sense of themselves FORCED ON THEM IN CHILDHOOD, with all their unexplained ‘over-reactions’, yet THEY HAVE NO CLUE WHAT TO DO WITH IT. So it becomes a PAINFUL THING, A HATEFUL THING SENT TO TORTURE YOU, so you seek solace in regressing back to THE ‘BLISSFUL NOTHINGNESS OF A CHILD’, you actually seek it out, BECAUSE YOU REJECT YOUR SUPERNATURAL SELF WHILST CHERRY PICKING THE LITTLE BITS OF IT OUT THAT THRILL YOU, so YOU ‘THROW THE BABY OUT WITH THE BATH WATER’. And it’s not even your fault…
So, LISTEN UP – I do this for you today as a COURTESY, see there is not much opportunity or need for it as a Teacher – no one wants to develop themselves SERIOUSLY if they have not grown up to a BIG degree ALREADY, their only interest in Spirituality will be little more than MEDICINAL, or at best the Hollywood version of Tantrism (eg Spiritual Levels of Sex), so the last thing they want to do is CHANGE, THEY SIMPLY HAVE NO INTEREST IN IT, AS THEY LOVE BEING A CHILD.
So we will never meet, as like all TEACHERS I could not give the smallest fuck what happens to you – YOU ARE NOT WORTH IT and YOU KNOW IT, BECAUSE YOU ARE ‘EASY’, so you don’t value yourself, and therefore have no value to anyone else EITHER. BE CLEAR, TO US You’re AN EVER CHANGING, FLAKEY MESS, YOU DON’T REALLY EVEN EXIST, AS YOUR CHARACTER IS SHITTY LITTLE COLLECTION OF POINTLESS, DEFENSIVE, AND LONG OUT-OF-DATE ‘REACTIONS’ THAT ‘YOU ARE NOT CONSCIOUS OF’ AS A CHILD. See your problem is not really your FAKE CHARACTER, I could break that ‘MATCH WOOD’ in a few mins as I have done many times, to many people over the years, YOUR PROBLEM AS A CHILD IS THAT YOU HAVE NOTHING ELSE BUT THAT FAKE CHARACTER, you ONLY have those approximate, badly remembered, badly interpreted PATTERN reactions, so you have to go back to them, which is why you always fail to change…
SPECIFICALLY, YOU HAVE VIRTUALLY NO ABILITY TO STAND AGAINST YOUR ‘INSTINCTS’ UNLESS YOU ARE SCARED INTO DOING IT EXTERNALLY, which interestingly is one of the ‘book definitions’ of EVIL, as you ‘know not what you DO’, even when you think you DO GOOD – YOU HAVE NO ‘INTERNAL LAW AS TRUTH’, SO YOU MUST RELY ON ‘EXTERNAL LAWS’, DRIVEN BY YOUR PETTY FEARS, TO KEEP YOU FROM TOTAL SELF-DESTRUCTION. All obvious enough eh, but wait – YOU DON’T THINK THAT DO YOU, YOU THINK YOU HAVE (SOME) ‘CHARACTER’, AND ITS BASICALLY GOOD, but you are WRONG, BECAUSE YOU ARE A CHILD, SO IT IS IMPOSSIBLE FOR YOU TO HAVE CHARACTER SEPARATE TO YOUR INSTINCTS, AS A CHILD IS THEIR INSTINCTS, there is nothing else – YOU ARE FAKE, WHAT YOU THINK OF YOURSELF IS A DELUSION, BASED ON EHANCED MEMORIES OF GOOD, AND THE REMOVAL OF ALL THE BAD, TRAGIC, TRASHY ONES. YOU RE-INVENT YOUR OPINION OF YOURSELF CONSTANTLY, YET STRANGELY WHAT YOU DO NEVER CHANGES AT ALL…
Do you SEE THE PROBLEM WITH BEING A CHILD NOW – BEING A CHILD ALLOWS FAKE YOU TO DOMINATE YOU, SO YOU BECOME A PUPPET OF THE MEANINGLESS GARBAGE THAT IS ‘YOUR MOMENTARY TRUTH’ PRESENTED TO TO YOU EVERY SECOND AS ‘FALSE INSTINCT’, which has no TRUTH, NO GNOSIS IN IT WHATSOEVER. Much as GROWING UP WON’T REMOVE THAT FAKE CHARACTER, AT LEAST YOU WILL HAVE THE ABILITY TO SEE IT, so all of this development stuff will start to actually MAKE SENSE, AS YOU WILL HAVE THE ABILITY TO DEVELOP A SENSE OF YOURSELF AGAINST THAT FAKE SHIT.
See, once you have a semi-permanent SENSE OF YOURSELF, you can decide to be whoever you want, INSTEAD ACCEPTING FAKE YOU, THE SELF OF ‘NO-SELF’, as all these other OPTIONS WILL BECOME VISIBLE TO YOU IN THE MOMENT, so you won’t have to follow your FAKE FALSE INSTINCTS as your ‘only option’. The CONFIDENCE you get from BOTTLE AS A SENSATION WILL THEN ALLOW YOU TO TRY THEM, to actually TRY CHANGING YOUR REACTIONS, before you REACT WITH CHILDISH FALSE INSTINCT, and after a while of playing with this YOU WILL WANT TO CHANGE YOUR REACTIONS TO IMPROVE YOUR LIFE RESULTS…
See it this way, your CHILDISH, totally FAKE character is a carton of milk you don’t remember buying, left at back of the fridge way too long, so YOU HAVE ‘GONE OFF’, and are now full of chunky yellow bits that smell like vomit, AND PROVIDE NO USEFUL FUNCTION WHATSOEVER – they don’t even make you happy, BUT FOR SOME DUMB ASS REASON YOU THINK THAT IS ‘YOU’ FOREVER, not just who you were as a CHILD. Bizarre, eh – YET YOU HAVE NO IDEA, THAT YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHO YOU ARE, HOW YOU COME ACROSS, WHY YOU DO WHAT YOU DO IN THE MOMENT, even looking back at what you have just done a moment ago is hard for you, YET YOU DON’T EVEN SEE THAT, SEE THAT SOMETHING ELSE IS STOPPING YOU DOING THAT, WHICH YOU MUST THEN PUSH AGAINST TO DO IT, AT ALL!
It all comes back to your CHILDISH STATE OF MIND, so I have to cure you of that, if you are ever going to be able to deal with THE FEAR/DESIRE/BOREDOM CYCLE of your Animal Level of Consciousness…
A CHILD HAS NO SENSE OF THEMSELVES IN THE WORLD, THE SENSE OF WHO THEY ARE, OR EVEN WHO THEY WANT TO BE.
THE CHARACTER YOU THINK YOU HAVE IS AUTOMATIC, OCCURING AS A REACTION, WITHOUT THOSE REACTIONS YOUR SENSE OF SELF ‘DISAPPEARS’, WHICH IS WHY OVERTHINKING IS THE NO1 DISEASE OF THE ‘VERY CHILDISH’, HOWEVER GIFTED YOU ARE – YOU NEED IT TO EXIST.
SEE A CHILD IS AN EMPTY VESSEL, A BLANK SHEET OF PAPER, A CHILD HAS ‘NO SELF’, SO HAS NOTHING ‘TO JUDGE INSTINCTIVE ACTIONS AGAINST’, SO WITHOUT THAT SENSE OF SELF A CHILD HAS LITTLE CHOICE BUT TO THINK ALL THE TIME, OR THEY REGRESS TO AN FERAL, ANIMAL STATE – A PARASITE.
TO BE AN ADULT YOU MUST HAVE A SENSE OF YOURSELF SEPARATE TO YOUR INSTINCTS, AS THEN YOU CAN SEE YOUR INSTINCTS AS THEY OCCUR, AND LEARN TO LAUGH ‘AT THEM’, INSTEAD OF ‘BEING NOTHING BUT THEM’.
THEN YOU WILL START TO UNDERSTAND WHAT EVIL ‘IS’, WHAT SELF-SABOTAGE ‘IS’, WHAT A NASTY LITTLE ANIMAL TWAT ‘IS’…
Yep, logically it could not be more obvious could it, BUT THE REAL ISSUE, THE ISSUE YOU HAVE, THE ISSUE THAT TRAPS YOU, IS THIS…
YOU think BEING A CHILD IS GOOD, IS A HUMAN RIGHT, RATHER THAN A BRIEF TRANSITIONAL PHASE BEFORE FACING SOME ANCIENT ‘RITE OF PASSAGE’ BECAUSE YOU NEED TO GROW UP TO ‘SURVIVE’, like your ancestors did back in the FOREST – YOU DON’T NEED TO GROW UP TO SURVIVE, DO YOU, SOCIETY CARRYS YOU. SO YOU CAN NEVER ACCEPT THAT THERE IS SOMETHING ‘WRONG WITH YOU’, and so COMMIT TO CHANGE.
See THE MOTIVATION OF BEING ‘BETTER THAN’ IS NOT ENOUGH TO MOTIVATE ‘A CHILD’ TO CHANGE, FRANKLY EVEN ‘FREE MONEY’ WOULD NOT BE ENOUGH FOR MOST OF YOU, you are that fucking useless. This is why nobody bothers with you, why I don’t bother with you, why your life is a spin drier of THE SAME OLD SHIT, WHY YOU ARE STUCK IN THE CESS PIT OF ‘THE GRATEFUL DEAD’, (Sorry, it’s too soon for that speech…).
See BEING A CHILD IS ‘SAFE’ FOR YOU, so YOU ARE A COWARD, so YOU CAN NEVER FACE YOUR OWN ‘SOUL’, WHENEVER YOU TRY TO ‘it’ JUST LASHES OUT AT OTHERS AS THAT IS WHAT YOUR CHILD DOES TO MAKE YOU FEEL ‘SAFE AS A REACTION’. Ever noticed that, EVER NOTICED HOW BIGGER PUSSY YOU ARE, that you have to try and HIDE IT BEHIND AGGRESSION TOWARD OTHERS to defend yourself even when you know you are wrong, that you have fuck all ability to ever do, BECAUSE YOU ARE A PUSSY? SPOILER ALERT = THERE IS ‘SOMETHING WRONG WITH YOU’, BECAUSE THERE IS ‘NO YOU’, STUPID – YOU ARE A CHILD.
Kinda funny really, don’t you think, TO BE SO OBVIOUSLY TRANSPARENT THAT WE CAN READ YOU FROM 10 FEET AWAY, BECAUSE THERE IS ‘SOMETHING WRONG WITH YOU’, but YOU CAN’T SEE THAT BECAUSE YOU ARE A CHILD. You think its COOL TO BE THE SAME, THINK THE SAME, FEEL THE SAME AS YOU DID AT 10 Y/OS, THAT YOUR INSIGNIFICANT ANTI-HERO IS ‘CLEVER’, like a little bug who thinks his little pile of shit is the whole world – THAT WHAT YOU THINK MATTERS TO ANYBODY ELSE AT ALL, that your opinion is any more than the self-serving ramblings of a 6 y/o screaming for their mummy, YET YOU EXPECT ME TO CARE WHAT YOU THINK TODAY, KNOWING IT WILL CHANGE X10 TIMES BEFORE TOMORROW AND STILL BE TOTAL GARBAGE? And you don’t really feel any better DO YA, you just feel a little safer from what would otherwise be YOUR TOTAL HUMILIATION, which is STILL waiting to get ya, quietly in the corner, SO you have not even really done anything more than put it off for another fucking day, IF EVEN THAT – AND THIS IS WHAT YOU SPEND YOUR ENERGY ON, REALLY BITCH?
YES, for a CHILD EVERYTHING IS ‘NOT THEIR FAULT’, indeed YOU made those mistakes AGAIN ‘on purpose’, because YOU ‘wanted to’, because its MY FAULT YOU DID THIS, because its COOL, because YOU did ‘not care’, because they are the way they are, BECAUSE YOU ARE CLEVER AND PLAY BOTH ENDS AGAINST THE MIDDLE SO YOU ALWAYS HAVE AN EXCUSE FOR YOUR BASIC CRAP, ie BECAUSE YOU THINK LIKE A LITTLE TWAT. You WHINE TO YOURSELF, let yourself off the hook, BECAUSE THAT IS HOW THE EGO SAFETY OF A CHILD WORKS, so you are TOTALLY FAKE – THERE IS NOTHING ANYONE CAN DO WITH YOU, as there is ‘NO YOU’ TO TALK TO, is there, YOU ARE COLLECTION of ever-changing historic fantasies on the screen of your mind. AND YOU FEEL FINE, JUST AS LONG AS YOU CAN ‘GET AWAY WITH IT’, so you have to blank out the fact THAT YOU NEVER GET AWAY WITH IT, you are so OBVIOUSLY A FREAK it’s PAINFUL TO WATCH…
Yes, TO GROW UP YOU MUST ACCEPT THAT IT IS TOTALLY UN NATURAL TO BE A CHILD WHEN YOU HAVE GROWN UP PHYSICALLY, I’m not using a metaphor, THERE IS SOMETHING WRONG WITH YOU, INDEED YOU ARE ‘DISTURBED’ – IN THE WORLD OF YOUR ANCESTORS YOU WOULD MOST LIKELY BE DEAD ALREADY, OR LITTLE MORE THAN A ‘HOUSE SLAVE’, A PROSTITUTE. The transition from a CHILD to an ADULT is THE 1ST STEP to DEVELOPING YOURSELF, where the mental stance you MUST adopt EVOLVES INTO BEING ‘MORE THAN YOU ARE’, BEING ‘BETTER THAN’, whilst GROWING UP IS ABOUT BEING ‘ANYTHING SOLID, CONSISTENT AT ALL’, INSTEAD OF A DELUSIONAL PUSSY WHO JUST WANTS TO RUN AWAY FROM REALITY ALL THE TIME – why you have to GROW UP TO DEVELOP …
But, a particularly modern phenomenon has been noted amongst you, AND I MEAN EVEN THE ONES WHO ARE ACTUALLY WORTH THE TROUBLE, the ones who are not faking it everyday, as that is the modern way, the ones in my Key Demographic of GIFTED HEDONISTS – even when you get enough life experience and DO START wanting to CHANGE, YOU HAVE NO FUCKING CLUE WHAT IT IS, OR HOW TO DO IT because you have never been taught CLASS SYSTEMS, so you don’t get the US and THEM thing, the ‘Better Than’ YOU and the ‘Worse Than’ YOU THING. YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND THE TRANSFORMATIONAL POWER OF IT AS A TRANSITIONAL STATE OF MIND, THAT IS WHAT ELITISM IS YOU SILLY BITCH, TO BE BETTER THAN ‘YOURSELF’, chasing the SAME TYPE OF FEELING YOU HAVE NOW WHEN YOU FEEL BETTER THAN ‘OTHER PEOPLE’ FOR A MOMENT, WHEN YOU FEEL a bit SPECIAL, SIGNIFICANT, because your CONSTANT STATE OF ANXIETY, YOUR INFERIORITY COMPLEX HAS LESSENED, for a moment, BEFORE BOUNCING RIGHT BACK EVEN HIGHER.
Try and understand CONCEPTUALLY – YOU CAN’T FEEL THIS ‘BETTER THAN’ RIGHT NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A CHILD, BLINDED TO YOUR INFERIORITY COMPLEX,SO YOU LIVE IN A STATE OF LOW-LEVEL FEAR ALL THE FUCKING TIME, FEAR OF PROBLEMS, FEAR OF LOSS, FEAR OF BEING FOUND OUT, FEAR OF ANYTHING THAT PASSESS BY. TO GROW UP YOU MUST DRAMATICALLY LESSEN THIS BY SEEING IT IN CONTRAST TO FEELING SUPERIOR AS MUCH AS YOU CAN ALL THE TIME IN A ‘REAL WAY’, SO THE FAKE, DELUSIONAL WAYS YOU USE AS A CHILD, THE WAY OF SECRET CLEVERNESS, OF EGO SAFETY, OF CHASING THE BASIC BEHAVIOURS THAT SIMPLY ‘NUMB’ YOUR ANXIETIES FOR A MOMENT ARE DRAMATICALLY REDUCED BECAUSE YOU RECOGNIZE THEM FOR THAT THEY ARE AGAINST THE REAL VERSION – EGO SAFETY IS THE AWFUL FANTASY OF A CHILD…
Need it even more simply than that?
A CHILD CAN NEVER FEEL ‘BETTER THAN’ BECAUSE A CHILD ‘IS’ THEIR INFERIORITY COMPLEX, ITS WHOLE LIFE IS THE SECRET WORLD OF EGO SAFETY AS A SET OF AUTOMATIC REACTIONS = YOUR FAKE, USELESS CHARACTER.
SO A CHILD CAN NEVER DEVELOP THEMSELVES, THEY SIMPLY HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THE FUCK I’M TALKING ABOUT, BECAUSE THEY CAN’T FEEL IT – YOU HAVE NOTHING TO PUT AGAINST YOUR FEAR, BECAUSE THERE ‘IS’ NOTHING RELIABLE, SOLID INSIDE YOU, THAT IS WHY WE SAY IT THIS WAY.
YES, THE WIND JUST BLOWS STRAIGHT THROUGH YOU, BECOMES YOU FOR A MOMENT, BECAUSE THERE IS NOTHING SOLID INSIDE YOU, NO SOLID ‘SENSE OF YOURSELF’ IN THIS WORLD TO RESIST IT, NO REAL CHARACTER, SO WHY DO YOU GIVE A FUCK ABOUT WHAT HAPPENS ON THE NEWS?!
SEE WHEN THERE IS NOTHING TO RESIST THE ‘WIND OF EVERYDAY EXPERIENCE’ YOUR HISTORICAL REACTIONS TO THAT WIND JUST PLAY OUT IN A LOOP – YOU CAN NOT STAND AGAINST THIS FAKE CHARACTER UNLESS YOU CAN RESIST IT IN THE MOMENT, YOU ARE A CHILD.
THEREFORE YOU MUST GROW UP TO DEVELOP YOURSELF BECAUSE THAT SOLID FEELING MAKES YOU ABLE TO FEEL SUPERIOR TO THAT CHILD AND YOU CAN STAND AGAINST IT, TO FEEL ‘SIGNIFICANT’, BRAVE AS YOUR NORMAL STATE OF MIND, AS A SOLID, CERTAIN THING.
THIS SOLID FEELING LEADS TO THE REST OF IT, TO THE ABILITY TO DEVELOP HIGHER STATES OF CONSCIOUSNESS, BECAUSE YOU CAN ‘CHANGE’.
The issue is that right now you cannot relate to this, as you don’t feel it, SO YOU THINK FEELING ‘EMPTY NOTHINGNESS’ ALL THE TIME IS NORMAL – TO FEEL LIKE A CHILD WITH NO SENSE OF YOURSELF OUTSIDE OF YOUR CONTINUALLY PASSING THOUGHTS IS NORMAL TO YOU, BECAUSE YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU ARE MISSING. Spoiler alert – IT’S NOT BLOODY NORMAL, IT’S FUCKING STUPID TO CONTINUE TO LIVE WITH THE SAME FAKE, FLAKEY ‘NO CHARACTER’ OF A CHILD, WHEN YOU ARE AN ADULT…
However, many GIFTED do have this SENSE OF THEMSELVES NATURALLY AS INTROVERTS, or through SOME CHILDHOOD SHOCK OR A STRONG ‘AESTHETIC SENSE’ (UNCONTROLLABLE EMOTIONS OR SENSATIONS AS UNEXPLAINABLE REACTIONS TO SOME TYPES OF EXPERIENCE), but they miss label it mentally as NEGATIVE SELF-CONSCIOUSNESS, AS SHYNESS, AS TO FEEL EMBARRASSED FOR NO REASON OTHER THAN EXTERNAL ATTENTION, which is a big cause of TOXIC OVERTHINKING – you have this already BUT YOU HAVE FUCKED IT UP. So we need to fix this, we need to take what you THINK YOU have or don’t have, and DO IT CORRECTLY FOR IT TO BE A ‘POSITIVE’, TO USE IT CORRECTLY LIKE AN ARISTOS DOES, LIKE ‘WE’ DO, in a way you CAN relate too …
SO IN THE FINEST ZAZEN TRADITION, THE ‘PROCESS’ OF GROWING UP MUST BECOME THE ‘GOAL’ IN ITSELF – THE SENSE OF BOTTLE YOU BUILD AGAINST YOUR INFERORITY MUST FEEL SUPERIOR, SO IT ‘FEELS BETTER’ THAN BEING A CHILD, BECOMES PREFERABLE AT EVEN YOUR CURRENT, MEANINGLESS ANIMAL LEVEL, RELATIVELY SPEAKING.
GET THIS VERY SIMPLY, AS YOU NEED TO REMEMBER IT:
THE SUPERIOR FEELING OF BOTTLE AS A PHYSICAL SENSATION ACTUALLY ‘GROWS YOU UP’ BY REPLACING YOUR INFERIORITY COMPLEX OVER TIME, WHEN IT BECOME ‘A MOOD STATE’.
BUT YOU MUST MAKE IT STRONG ENOUGH TO ‘STICK’ AS A MOOD, SO THAT YOUR EGO SAFETY CAN NOT BREAK IT DOWN BY USING YOUR OLD, BANAL COMFORTERS TO ‘WEAKEN IT’.
IN THIS SIMPLE WAY ALL YOUR CHILDISHNESS, AND WITH IT A LARGE PART OF YOUR FAKE CHARACTER, DIES. THEN, AND ONLY THEN, CAN YOU DEVELOP YOURSELF, AS YOU WILL HAVE THE ABILITY TO CHANGE…
BUT PLEASE BE WARNED:
IF YOU REMAIN SO EMBARRASSED BY WHAT YOU HAVE DONE AS A CHILD, THAT YOU CAN NEVER TURN AND ‘FACE IT’, THEN NOTHING I WILL SAY OR SHOW YOU TODAY WILL MAKE ANY DIFFERENCE. YOU WILL FEEL FORCED TO DOUBLE DOWN ON YOUR CHILDISHNESS AND SO ACTUALLY GET WORSE, BECAUSE YOU REFUSE TO DEVELOP THE BOTTLE YOU NEED TO FACE YOUR PAIN – YOU MUST CLING TO THE SPECIFIC ‘LATE STAGE’ DELUSION OF ‘YOUR SECRET POWER’, BUT YOU DON’T HAVE ANY POWER, AND YOU DON’T HAVE ANY SECRETS, BECAUSE YOU DON’T HAVE ANYONE LEFT YOU CAN TRUST, BECAUSE YOU CAN NOT TRUST ‘YOURSELF’ – YOU, YOUR UNCONSCIOUS CHARACTER THAT CONTROLS WHAT HAPPENS TO YOU, HATES YOU.
SO BEFORE YOU READ THE REST OF THIS, KNOW THAT I WISH YOU GOOD LUCK, BECAUSE YOU ARE GOING TO NEED IT TO BE ABLE TO STOP, AS YOU WILL HAVE CREATED AN ENVIRONMENT THAT MAKES IT VERY DIFFICULT TO STOP ‘FEEDING’ YOUR FANTASY WORLD AND GET OFF THAT BUS, EVEN IF YOU ARE ‘THE BUS’ – TRUST ME, I HAVE SEEN IT MANY TIMES AND IT ENDS IN ‘SELF HARM’.
SPECIFICALLY, IF YOU SUFFER FROM HIGH LEVELS OF SELF-DESTRUCTIVE EMBARRASSMENT YOU WILL ALREADY BE HUGELY DEPENDENT ON EXTREME LEVELS OF COMPLEX FANTASY, OFTEN WITH THE HELP OF DRUGS, OTHER FANTASISTS, EXTREME ACTIVITIES TO NUMB YOU, TO COPE IN YOUR NORMAL LIFE, AND THAT ALWAYS FAILS DRAMATICALLY IN THE END, LIKE A CUT GLASS VASE DROPPED ON A HARD FLOOR, SO ITS BETTER ‘TO FACE IT’ BEFORE THAT HAPPENS – YOUR NORMAL IS ALREADY VERY FRAGILE AND VERY FUCKED UP, SO WILL MOST LIKELY BE VERY SECRET TO YOU, WHILST BEING VERY OBVIOUS TO EVERYONE ELSE….
THERE IS NO FUTURE TO A LIFE OF HATING YOURSELF YET FEELING COMPELLED TO GO ON AND ON, IT NEVER GOES AWAY BY ITSELF, IT JUST GETS WORSE AND WORSE AND WORSE AS YOU AGE UNTIL YOU CHANGE, ONE WAY OR ANOTHER, AS YOU WILL FIND ‘THE WORLD’ EVENTUALLY INTERVENES IN YOUR DELUSIONS AND WAKES YOU UP, AND THEN WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU THINK REALLY WON’T MATTER, AS NO ONE WILL CARE – YOU WILL GO INSANE. SEE REALITY ALWAYS BITES CHILDREN IN THE END, AS YOUR LUCK, YOUR GIFT ALWAYS ‘RUNS OUT’, so you will BE unable to maintain your delusions…
PLEASE do try and remember what I have said multiple times – EVERYTHING IS A TEST IF YOU ARE GIFTED, SPIRITED. If anything your obvious, twatty, CREEPY, transparent, predictable CHILD has already done MATTERED A DAMN TO ME OR ANYONE ELSE YOU WOULD ALREADY BE GONE. BUT YOU CAN NOT KEEP FAILING THESE TESTS YOUR CONSCIENCE IS SETTING YOU, as it’s GOOD NEWS THAT IT IS STILL TRYING, but it is TERMINAL WHEN IT STOPS – LEARN OR BURN. And you MUST GROW UP if you expect me or anyone else SERIOUS to even notice you are alive, OTHERWISE YOU ARE NOT WORTH THE ATTENTION YOU SO DESPERATELY CRAVE, BECAUSE THERE IS NO VALUE TO US IN YOU, ‘YOU’ ARE ‘NOTHING’ SIMPLY BECAUSE YOU HAVE NOT GROWN UP – GET IT?
SEE, right now YOU SIMPLY DON’T UNDERSTAND THAT EVERYTHING YOU NEED SITS ON THE OTHERSIDE OF ‘A CHALLENGE’ THAT YOU MUST ‘TRY’, which requires you to CHANGE FROM BEING A TOTAL PUSSY WHO JUST WANTS EVERYTHING TO BE EASY… See, YOU JUST THINK EVERYTHING IS ‘LIKE’ BEING A CHILD BECAUSE YOU HAVE BEEN TOLD THAT MAKES US ALL EQUAL AS A GOOD THING, instead of A PATHETICALLY ‘AVERAGED DOWN’ MESS, BECAUSE OUR SOCIETY HAS REGRESSED, AND GIVEN UP THE VAST STORE HOUSE OF KNOWLEDGE CONTAINED IN ANCIENT CLASS SYSTEMS BECAUSE IT HATES THEM AS ELITIST, UPPER CLASS, which is NOT COOL to little old you, is it, EVEN THOUGH ANY FOOL CAN SEE YOU CAN STILL BE ELITIST WHILST BEING AS KIND AS YOU WISH TO OTHERS ‘LESS THAN’ YOU.
NO, the OTHERS WOULD SEE YOU AS NASTY, SO YOU CAN’T, CAN YOU, BUT WE CAN, BECAUSE WE ARE ‘BETTER THAN’ YOU, we have EARNT THAT RANK, yet YOU FOUND IT HARD EVEN TO READ THAT, didn’t you, because you are a CHILD WHO HAS NO IDEA THAT YOU NEED TO ‘EVOLVE’ TO CHANGE UNLESS FORCED TO, and all evolution is ELITIST BY DEFINITION. But You think BEING A CHILD IS NOT ONLY ‘COOL’, it is acceptable, ITS FUN, IT’S EVEN ‘NORMAL’ IN YOUR FAKE LITTLE WOKE WORLD, as it so obviously cycles through this political fad after that one, in our repetitive, tedious and futile world of meaningless popularism – everyone you know ‘acts’ like an ENTITLED fucking child, SO YOU HAVE NO ABILITY TO STAND AGAINST YOUR ‘INSTINCTS’, reliably, without needing someone else to SCARE THE SHIT OUT OF YOU, someone like me.
SEE I’M REALLY NOT GOING TO TELL YOU WHAT YOU WANT TO HEAR FOR ‘LIKES’, all teachers hate being liked by Childish Animals, it DEGRADES THEM, OBVIOUSLY, so I HAVE TO HIT YOU HARD WITH THIS, AS YOU REALLY DON’T ‘GET IT’ – you don’t get ‘BOTTLE’, do you. You exist in the formulaic little world where TRUTH IS THIS WEEKS ADVICE FROM YOUR SOCIAL MEDIA COACH, who literally tells you to write some banal garbage that starts, ‘I don’t know who needs to hear this…’ and ends with some version of ‘… and its OK TO BE A CREEPY, FAKE FUCK UP, AS AT LEAST YOU HAD MADE ME SOME MONEY BY READING THIS SHIT’. Yes, YOU ARE SO FUCKING FAKE YOU WOULD NOT KNOW THE TRUTH IF IT HIT YOU IN THE CROTCH WITH A LUMP HAMMER, you think AI is a GOOD THING, THAT THE REHASHED AVERAGE ‘OPINION OF THE INTERNET’, SO UTTERLY INFESTED WITH BOTS, PORN AND ASTRO-TURFING, IS IN SOME WAY ‘THE TRUTH’, GOOD, some form of EVOLUTION, INSTEAD OF AN EVEN FASTER FORM OF DEGENERATION BACKWARDS THAN EVER…
So today I have to SHOW YOU THAT WE ARE ‘NOT WOKE’, WE ARE ‘AWAKE’, and be the BAD UNCLE YOU WISH YOU HAD AS A KID, the one who tells you the real ‘facts of life’, the one who tells you how to LIE, CHEAT, STEAL, FIGHT, to deal with the playground bully instead of complaining to the school which just makes the THEM WORSE, and YOU WEAKER. To do this I have to TELL YOU WHAT GROWING UP IS, I HAVE TO GET YOU TO WANT TO GROW UP, AND THEN SHOW YOU THE MECHANISM OF ACTUALLY BEING ABLE TO DO IT, THE ‘A TO B TO C’ OF IT, which is all about BOTTLE, as you don’t have a bloody PRAYER OF GROWING UP WITHOUT BOTTLE, not a fucking chance in HELL – YOU WERE NEVER TAUGHT THIS AT SCHOOL, indeed your schools have literally REMOVED THE NEED TO DO IT, ACTUALLY MADE IT BOTH UN-NESSECARY AND BAD.
The bastards, eh, SO it’s A GOOD JOB IT’S REALLY EASY WHEN YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO THEN, the hard bit is WANTING IT IN LATER LIFE, because right now YOU HAVE ALMOST NO ABILITY TO GO AFTER WHAT YOU WANT, LET ALONE ‘ASK FOR HELP’, shit – most of you don’t even know what you want outside of SAFETY, WHICH IS ALL ABOUT ‘EGO SAFETY’, which defines you as a CHILD WHO IS DOMINATED BY YOUR FAKE CHARACTER. Ego Safety is a TRAP YOU MORON, A CAGE YOU LIVE IN THAT REMOVES ALL THE OTHER OPTIONS FROM YOUR MIND, so YOUR LIFE its just your routines and your BASIC.
AN ADULT WANTS ‘RISK’ ALL THE TIME, not just neatly wrapped up in your little BASIC, as they know that is the KEY TO LIFE, to the point that all else is the same as sleep, BUT A CHILD JUST WANTS BANAL COMFORT BECAUSE NO ONE HAS EVER EXPLAINED THE MOST BASIC OF ALL THESE EMOTIONAL MECHANISMS YOU WERE BORN WITH – it’s THE CHALLENGE THAT PAYS FOR THE CHANGE, IT IS A SUPERNATURAL MECHANSIM OF ENERGY EXCHANGE. So you MUST CONTINUAL ‘MOVE FORWARD’, PUT YOURSELF IN HARMS WAY, FACE WHAT MAKES YOU FEARFUL, EVEN JUST UNCOMFORTUABLE, IN ORDER TO CREATE THE SPACE FOR THAT CHALLENGE TO EXIST. Look around you, SEE IF YOU CAN SPOT THE ADULTS FROM THE CHILDREN ON THAT BASIS, and LOOK BACK AT WHAT YOU ACTUALLY DO DIFFERENT, IF AT ALL.
See, growing up has LITERALLY become a SECRET in the last 50 years, where the world increasingly breaks down to those few who have ‘BOTTLE’, AND THE VAST MAJORITY, LIKE YOU, WHO DON’T – see without BOTTLE, without an ‘ANCHOR’, YOU CAN’T DO ANYTHING DIFFERENT, YOU CANNOT EVOLVE OR CHANGE, SO YOU BECOME A CARICATURE OF YOUR KIND, REPEATING YOURSELF, YOUR MISTAKES, YOUR STUPIDITY, YOUR INCOMPETENCE, ALL THE FLAWS IN YOUR UPBRINGING OVER AND OVER AGAIN, WHILST ‘SQAUNDERING’ EVERYTHING THAT USED TO MAKE YOU SPECIAL ON ‘REPETITIVE NOTHINGNESS’, AS THAT IS YOUR ONLY ‘COMFORT’ FOR BEING NOTHING, FOR BEING ‘POWERLESS’, FOR BEING A CHILD WHO CAN’T ‘DO ANYTHING’. It is a perfect trap, the trap of the ‘CLEVER, CUNNING LITTLE DORK’, the trap you are STUCK IN…
SHOCKER, EH? Yet, we are, where we are, or more precisely YOU ARE STUCK WHERE YOU ARE – AS A CHILD. So see THIS VERY CLEARLY BEFORE YOU READ ON – you don’t wanna GROW UP DO YOU? You have ‘JUST ENOUGH COMFORT’ TO KEEP GOING THE WAY YOU ARE, so you eventually dissolve into a fat, ugly, smelly, stagnant ‘puddle of piss’, YOU BECOME THE embarrassment YOU FEEL. And it’s not even your piss, IS IT, YOU ARE COPYING ALL THE CHILDISH DORKS AROUND YOU, as you don’t have a fucking clue what you are doing BECAUSE YOU ARE A CHILD – you have NO PURPOSE, and even OXYGEN is wasted on you.
So lets set the scene, show you the ‘front door’ of this AS A BIG PICTURE, the first of many today:
TO BE A CHILD IS TO DELUDE YOURSELF ON PURPOSE, BECAUSE IT FEELS ‘BETTER THAN’ YOUR ANXIETY, IN THE MOMENT…
THAT DELUSION GROWS TO INCLUDE EVERYTHING IN YOUR LIFE – NOTHING IS REAL, EVERYTHING BECOMES A FANTASY…
BY FANTASY I MEAN EVERYTHING BECOMES HISTORIC ‘MENTAL PICTURES’ OF REALITY THAT ARE NOT REAL, BUT YOU PREFER THEM TO REALITY BECAUSE THEY COMFORT YOUR EGO, SO THEY OVERPOWER ACTUAL REALITY WITH EMOTION WHICH IS THEREFORE HIDDEN FROM YOU, ‘UNDERNEATH’ THEM.
AGAIN, EVERYTHING YOU DO IS THE ‘SAME AS BEFORE’ SO YOU ‘SEE THE SAME AS BEFORE’, ‘FEEL THE SAME AS BEFORE’ SO YOU ‘APPROXIMATE’ REALITY INTO A GENERIC PATTERN THAT IS UNREAL, BASED ON A CHILDISH MEMORY, SO YOU STOP SEEING ACTUAL REALITY, YOU FIT REALITY INTO ‘A KNOWN PATTERN’ THAT SUITS YOUR FAKE SELF AS PART OF THE ‘PROCESS OF COGNITION’, UNCONSCIOUSLY, THIS IS WHY IT BECOMES ‘A FANTASY’.
THAT FANTASY INCLUDES YOUR SELF-CONSCIOUS SENSE, SO YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU ARE REALLY DOING, SAYING, LOOK LIKE IN THE MOMENT, BECAUSE YOU EXPERIENCE A PRESSURE WAVE, FAKE EMOTION AS A MENTAL DISTRACTION FROM REALITY THAT WORKS LIKE A ‘BAIT AND SWITCH’ TRICK.
SO YOU NEVER KNOW WHAT YOU ARE GOING TO DO BEFORE YOU ACT IT OUT, YOU CAN ONLY SEE YOUR FAKE BITCH SELF AFTERWARDS IN THE REACTION, YOU DON’T DECIDE WHAT THAT REACTION IS GOING TO BE CONSCIOUSLY, IT HAPPENS UNCONSCIOUSLY AND YOU ARE DUMB ENOUGH TO TRUST IT.
BUT WHEN YOU UNDERSTAND THAT TO ACT, THINK, FEEL LIKE A CHILD AS AN ADULT MEANS THERE IS SOMETHING WRONG WITH YOU, THEN YOU WILL STOP TRUSTING THOSE REACTIONS, AS YOU WILL UNDERSTAND THAT MANY OF THEM ARE SELF-DESTRUCTIVE – THEY ARE BASED ON FANTASY.
SEE, TO BE A CHILD IS TO HAVE NO CONSTANT SENSE OF SELF-AWARENESS PRIOR TO REACTION, BECAUSE TO BE A CHILD IS TO BE A ‘PUPPET’ CONTROLLED BY ROUTINE, AS YOUR ROUTINES ARE WHAT YOUR PATTERN REACTIONS CREATE – THERE IS ‘NO CHOICE’ IN THE MOMENT, IT IS ALWAYS THE SAME.
WHEN YOU GET THIS IN YOUR SOUL, WHEN ITS DAWNS ON YOU JUST HOW BIGGER PUSSY YOU ARE, BEING A CHILD WILL STOP BEING ‘COOL’ ALMOST INSTANTANEOUSLY, AND START BEING THE TOTAL HUMILIATION THAT EVERYONE ELSE ALREADY SEES…
THE ‘YOU’ THE WORLD SEES IS NOT ‘CONSCIOUS YOU’, OR ‘COOL YOU’, IT IS UNCONSCIOUS YOU, IT IS YOU THE FAKE TWAT, BUT YOUR CHILDISH EGO DEFENSE MECHANISMS PROTECT YOU FROM SEEING THAT, SO YOU ARE FUCKED INTO BEING IT, FOREVER.
YOU MUST MAKE THIS UNDERSTANDING REAL TO YOU – LARGE CHUNKS OF REALITY ARE LITERALLY ‘BLANKED OUT’ IN YOUR HEAD, YOU DON’T SEE WHAT IS HAPPENING FOR REAL, YOUR PATTERNS TAKE OVER AND ITS ALL A FANTASY OF IMAGES FROM MEMORY IN THE FEAR/DESIRE/BOREDOM CYCLE.
SEE TO BE A CHILD IS TO HIDE WHAT IS ‘WRONG WITH YOU’ FROM YOUR CONSCIOUS AWARENESS, THAT IS WHY YOU ARE UNCONSCIOUSLY FAKE, BUT YOU DON’T KNOW THAT, YOU THINK YOU ARE COOL AS A DEFENSIVE MECHANSIM.
BEING A CHILD CREATES AN AIRGAP BETWEEN CONSCIOUS YOU AND REALITY, YET YOU TRUST YOURSELF, YOU NEVER DOUBT YOURSELF, HOWEVER MUCH YOU DOUBT EVERYONE ELSE AS A PROJECTION OF THAT UNCONSCIOUS ‘SELF DOUBT’.
YES, BELIEVE IT – TO BE A CHILD IS TO BE UNAWARE OF WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU, SO IT GETS MUCH WORSE OVER TIME, YOU WANT TO DO IT MORE SO IT BECOMES SELF-DESTRUCTIVE, SIMPLY BECAUSE YOU DON’T STAND AGAINST IT AT THE TIME.
YOU HAVE TO GROW UP AND BECOME SELF-AWARE TO SEE THIS – YOU HAVE TO SEE WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU IN THE MOMENT OF WANTING TO ACT IT OUT, NOT JUST REGRET IT AFTERWARDS, AS THAT JUST STRENGTHENS THE PATTERNS YOU CAN’T STOP.
THAT IS THE SIMPLE REASON YOU THINK BEING A CHILD IS COOL, INSTEAD OF SEEING ‘TWAT YOU’ FOR WHAT YOU ARE – A SELF-IMPORTANT CHILD, CLINGING ON TO EGO SAFETY VIA MAKING IT ‘COOL’ YOU FOOL, SO YOU CAN’T CHANGE, EVER…
DON’T BELIEVE ME? SO LOOK AT THE CYCLES IN YOUR LIFE OF WHAT ‘ACTUALLY HAPPENS’, INSTEAD OF WHAT YOU THINK HAPPENS – YOU CANNOT TRUST YOUR THOUGHTS AS A CHILD, JUST LIKE YOU CAN’T TRUST YOUR FAKE FRIENDS EITHER…
SO ACCEPT THIS NOW – THE MORE YOU ARE DOMINATED BY YOUR EGO, YOUR OVERTHINKING, YOUR NEED FOR EXTERNAL VALIDATION FROM FAKE FRIENDS, ALL THE SAFETY THAT YOU ARE RIGHT, THEN THE BIGGER CHILDISH TWAT YOU ARE…
SO ACCEPT THERE IS ‘SOMETHING WRONG WITH YOU’, SO YOU CAN CHANGE IT.
KNOW THAT TO BE A CHILD IS NOT TO LIVE AUTHENTICALLY IN THE MOMENT LIKE YOU THINK, IT IS TO BE FOOLED BY THE MOMENTARY FANTASY IN YOUR HEAD INTO MAKING A TOTAL TWAT OF YOURSELF, WHICH YOU NEVER, EVER SEE AT THE TIME…
START TO SEE ‘THE CON’ OF WHAT YOUR CHILD CARES ABOUT, EG SEE THAT YOU ‘CARE’ ABOUT THINGS YOU DON’T ACTUALLY WANT BECAUSE THEY UNCONSCIOUSLY THREATEN YOU SO YOU MUST GET THEM TO ‘LIKE YOU’, SO MAKE YOU ‘SELF DESTRUCTIVE’ – YOU MAKE THAT ‘THREAT COME TRUE’ UNCONSCIOUSLY VIA YOUR PATTERN REACTIONS.
BUT YOU ARE FEARFUL OF THINGS YOU UNCONSCIOUSLY DO ACTUALLY WANT, BECAUSE THEY UNCONSCIOUSLY CHALLENGE YOU TO GROW UP, TO DEVELOP YOURSELF, SO OFFER THE CHANCE OF FAILURE AT AN EGOIC LEVEL WHICH YOU CAN’T STAND – YOU MAKE THAT CONTINUAL FAILURE COME TRUE VIA THOSE SAME PATTERN REACTIONS.
THIS IS WHAT IS ‘WRONG WITH YOU’, AND THE ANSWER, OBVIOUSLY, IS ‘BOTTLE’, TO HAVE THE BOTTLE TO NOT CARE ABOUT THINGS UNLESS THEY ADD SOME VALUE TO YOUR LIFE, AND GIVE UP YOUR DEFENSE MECHANISMS, AS, WELL… WHO CARES…
THE SAYING GOES – ‘A WOLF DOES NOT CONCERN HIMSELF WITH THE OPINIONS OF SHEEP’, IT ONLY CARES ABOUT WHAT THAT ONE SHEPHARD THINKS, BUTS IT’S FEAR DOES NOT STOP THAT WOLF, IT MAKES IT ‘BRAVE’, AS OTHERWISE IT WILL STARVE TO DEATH.
SO TRY THIS – YOU DON’T CONCERN YOURSELF WITH THE OPINIONS OF THE ANIMALS YOU EAT EVERYDAY, ITS CHILDISH, YET THAT IS THE SAME LEVEL OF CHILDISH ‘CARE’ ABOUT ‘LESS THAN’, THAT YOU DO EVERY SINGLE DAY AS NORMAL, AND THOSE ‘FALSE CARES’ CRIPPLE YOU, DENY YOU YOUR CHANCE AT A BETTER LIFE THAN THIS SHIT…
BUT YOU CAN NOT ‘THINK YOUR WAY OUT, AS YOU USE YOUR CHILDISH EGO TO THINK, SO YOU CAN ONLY BE LED OUT BY SOMETHING ELSE, BY THIS LESSON, BY ME, WHO CAN GET YOU TO CHERRY PICK THE BITS YOU LIKE, UNTIL YOU REALIZE YOU MUST DO IT ALL – IF YOU WANT ‘ADULT BENEFITS’, EG CONFIDENCE, YOU MUST ACTUALLY ‘BE ONE’, FIRST, SO YOU MUST CHANGE.
Yes, its not so much that you think INSIDE THE BOX, you don’t even think OUTSIDE THE BOX, you have no fucking clue what the BOX IS, let alone where the fuck it is, BECAUSE YOU DON’T THINK, YOU JUDGE BASED ON SOME HISTORIC FANTASY YOU ADOPTED AS A FORM OF EGO SAFETY AS A KID. You need a BOX, TO BUILD A BOX, a place to retreat to THAT IS DIFFERENT FROM CHILDISH PATTERN REACTION YOU DO NOW, and that BOX is made of ‘BOTTLE’, which gives you the ability to stand against your FALSE INSTINCTS, which you don’t even know you have BECAUSE YOU ARE A TEDIOUS LITTLE CHILD.
Do you understand the concept of this at least now? YOU MUST USE SOMEONE ELSES HEAD, THEIR THOUGHTS, UNTIL YOU ARE CAPABLE OF HAVING YOUR OWN, IN YOUR OWN BOX, otherwise you will remain a STUCK IN THE TRAP OF YOUR FAKE REACTIONS, and right now you can’t EVEN STOP THOSE REACTIONS BECAUSE YOU NEVER EVEN ‘TRY’ – A CHILD NEEDS THOSE REACTIONS TO KNOW WHAT TO DO, AN ADULT TESTS THOSE REACTIONS AGAINST WHAT THEY HAVE DECIDED THEY WANT, THAT THEY CARE ABOUT, AND DISCARDS THEM IF THEY ARE OF NO ‘USE’. See an ADULT tells themselves what they are ‘WANT’, AND THEN JUST GETS THE HELL ON WITH IT, but A child has NO IDEA WHAT IT WANTS, IT JUST WAITS FOR THINGS TO HAPPEN TO REACT AGAINST, so has to want whatever happens IN ORDER TO BE HAPPY AS A SLAVE, which is frankly SAD AS FUCK, just like you – DO YOU SEE ‘THE CURSE’ OF BEING A CHILD YET?
Now it very useful to GRASP THIS ISSUE RIGHT AT THE START, much as being childish is a sliding scale, at MOST levels you REALLY DON’T WANT TO CHANGE, you won’t accept help because as a childish adult you NEED ROUTINE, YOU NEED THINGS TO STAY THE SAME IN ORDER TO DEAL WITH LIFE, TO EVEN KNOW WHAT TO DO, cause everything is SCARY. You will actively reject the help of others EVEN WHEN YOU ASK FOR IT, with YOUR FAKE YOU MAKING IT SEEM UNCOOL OR DANGEROUS TO FOLLOW THIS HELP, making you believe THE WORST OF THOSE PEOPLE IN ORDER TO STOP YOU, EVEN WHEN YOUR NORMAL LIFE IS TOTAL SHIT, AND YOU KNOW ITS TOTAL SHIT, but you still don’t want to change.
The reason for this is not mental illness in the sense your understand it, IT IS THE WEAKNESS THAT COMES FROM FAKE YOU KEEPING YOU IN A VERY LOW ENERGY STATE. You have no energy to even THINK ABOUT CHANGE, let alone do it, ALL YOU CAN DO IS YOUR ROUTINES, with a particular focus on your COMFORTERS, as your childish comforts become your WHOLE LIFE, WITH NO IMPROVEMENT, NO ADVENTURE, NO CHANCE, and even those comforters become very simple, like ATTENTION, drugs, TV, music, eating, drinking, SLEEPING BUT most of all ROUTINES. This then leads to PROPER MENTAL ILLNESS, TO PILLS AND SELF HELP, why we have the explosion of it we do in our day and age…
SO LETS BE VERY CLEAR – TO BE A CHILD IS TO BE STUCK IN A WORLD OF CHEAP THRILLS, THE COMFORTS OF A SLAVE, in amongst all that ANXIETY AND SLAVERY TO WHAT EVERYONE ELSE YOU KNOW DOES. You HATE YOUR LIFE, so YOUR CHEAP THRILLS ARE ALL YOU HAVE, it’s an endless cycle of boom and bust, to no end, no purpose, SO YOU DESERVE WHAT HAPPENS TO YOU, you deserve to BURN, because if you are GIFTED THERE IS NO NEED FOR ANY OF THIS SHIT. If you have never GROWN UP AT ALL, and are now trapped by low energy levels, YOU HAVE A VERY SERIOUS IF VERY SIMPLE PROBLEM, AND THE ONLY WAY TO FACE IT IS TO SEE YOURSELF FOR WHAT YOU ARE, AND WHY YOU ARE THAT, THEN MAKE A CHOICE TO GROW UP AND BE THE TRUTH…
And YES – of course, this introduction has to be HARSH – YOU HAVE TO DECIDE TO CHANGE IF YOU WANT TO GROW UP IN ‘LATER LIFE’ (YOU ARE NOT A TEENAGER ANYMORE, ARE YOU, MUCH AS YOU still THINK THAT), SO WHAT THE FUCK IS THE POINT OF BEING KIND, EH? See, it is all your COMFORTING YOURSELF, ALL YOU COPING, ALL YOUR DELUDING YOURSELF THAT HAS KEPT YOU STUCK THERE, LIKE A TWAT – THERE IS NO VALUE TO YOU IN ME SOFTENING THIS BLOW, YOU HAVE TO HIT A ‘LOW EBB’ HARD AND FAST IN ORDER TO BOUNCE BACK UP HARD AND FAST ‘SO’ YOU CAN GROW UP STUPID, THAT IS THE POINT OF MAKING A CHOICE TO CHANGE. OTHERWISE YOU WILL THINK YOU CAN GO ON LIKE THIS, LIKE ‘NOTHING’ FOREVER, WHILE YOU FADE TO BLACK – all children regress as they age, they all become more and more immature as their energy fades away, until they can do nothing more than a 10y/o could, and a stupid 10 y/o at that, AS THEY CANNOT FACE CHANGE. They cannot really face anything WRONG WITH THEMSELVES…
So embrace this, embrace the pain of what the fuck your CONSCIENCE IS TRYING TO TELL YOU ABOUT WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU, THAT IS THE BLOODY REASON YOU HAVE ONE, your body wants to CRY FOR A REASON STUPID, your EMOTIONS ARE TRYING TO HELP YOUR DUMB ASS, LISTEN TO THEM, INSTEAD OF COMFORTING YOURSELF WITH YET ANOTHER CHEAP THRILL, ANOTHER DRUG AGAIN… SO TRY NOT TO SCREAM LIKE A BITCH ABOUT FUCK ALL, I know You see no NEED FOR ‘ADULTING’, YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT ACTUAL THRILLS ‘ARE’, so cheap is all you can DO, INDEED REAL THRILLS WOULD SCARE YOU. You simply want to drift through life, comforting yourself with the empty, feckless pleasures of a child, cause no one has taught you the COMFORTS OF ELITISM. Or more precisely, YOU HAVE NEVER BEEN FORCED TO GROW UP, and your society lets you GET BY without any need to DO IT, because you are just so fucking ‘precious’, so fragile, and your ‘state’ will have to baby you for the rest of your life, AS YOU CAN’T LOOK AFTER YOURSELF – YOU CAN’T DEFEND YOURSELF AGAINST YOUR LOWER, STUPID, SELF DESTRUCTIVE, UNCONSCIOUS FAKE SELF.
SEE THIS CLEAR – a CHILD IS DAMNED to wander around in a dream world AND GOD HELP ANYONE WHO TRIES TO HELP THEM, A WORLD WHERE EVERYTHING IS HIDDEN FROM YOU, CONCEALED BEHIND REACTIONS YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND, instead of living in the REAL WORLD, THE SUPERNATURAL ONE YOU KNOW ONLY FROM MYTHS AND LEGENDS, the world of your ANCESTORS WHO HAD THE BALLS TO DO IT, as FRANKLY FOR MANY OF THEM it was their ONLY OPTION TO SURVIVE, so it was a ‘choice’ they made willingly AS THE ALTERNATIVE WAS ACTUAL DEATH, not the silly little fears that control you…
Ahhh, but you need the SPIRITUAL VERSION OF THIS, you need it to be SPECIAL, SECRET, so know I’m not much for quoting from the Daoist canon on GROWING UP, much of it lacks context so is useless for modern readers, unwilling to do the background reading, but in terms of childishness, there is a lovely one from Laozi that is particularly instructive in showing you how your feckless little CHILDISH THOUGHTS, WHAT YOU THINK IS HARMLESS SO DO ‘JUST ONE MORE TIME’, ‘TO GET AWAY WITH IT’ again as a little security blanket, so ALL THAT CHILDISH SHIT becomes your DESTINY – YOU THINK WHAT HAPPENS IN YOUR LITTLE SKULL IS SECRET, so you can just FAKE YOUR ANTI HERO EVERY DAMN DAY, and no one will ever know what a HARMLESS POS you are, because you where HOT, once. REALLY KIDDA, YOU THINK ANYONE YOU KNOW THINKS THAT CRAP ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW..?
So BURN THIS INTO YOUR SKULL YOU SILLY BITCH, THIS IS WHY YOU NEED TO GROW UP, AND LEARN HOW TO ‘WATCH’:
‘Watch your thoughts; they become words.
Watch your words; they become actions.
Watch your actions; they become habits.
Watch your habits; they become character.
Watch your character; it becomes your destiny.
If you don’t CHANGE (your thoughts), you will end up where you are HEADING (THE CESSPIT FULL OF DEAD ANIMALS…)…’
SEE THIS IS WHERE YOU CHARACTER OF ‘NO CHARACTER’ COMES FROM, of all your BRAIN DEAD HABITS YOU CAN’T CHANGE BECAUSE YOU CAN’T SEE THEM IN THE MOMENT, but All CHANGE, in even the most basic of things, REQUIRES YOU TO GROW UP FIRST, because you cannot change YOURSELF as a child, YOU CAN ONLY REPEAT YOURSELF IN INCREASINGLY DISTURBED AND OUT OF CONTROL LITTLE WAYS, with only your FEARS OF EXPOSURE AND PUNISHMENT to moderate your behavior.
These ‘exposures’ are often ‘blanked out’, as they have already happened TO YOU, but you can’t FACE THE TRUTH OF THAT HUMILIATION, so you OFTEN ‘DOUBLE DOWN’ AND GO ON WITH IT, and become even more disturbed, secretive, AS YOU CLING ON TO BEING A CHILD, even when you know you destroy yourself, SO YOU MAKE IT COOL TO HUMILIATE YOURSELF, as that is the only way you can go on – TO VALIDATE YOURSELF AS NOT WORTHLESS OR INSANE by PRETENDING TO BE COOL, TO BE AN ANTI-HERO INSTEAD OF YOUR HERO, which you, so very clearly, ARE NOT. Some GIFTED Amercian TYPE once told me that to BE COOL, WHAT THEY TEACH YOU IN ‘HIGH SCHOOL’ MEANS THAT EVERYTHING GOOD, EXCITING AS AN ACHIEVEMENT MUST COME EASY, SO YOU DON’T HAVE TO TRY, LIKE ITS NATURAL, and that is why WESTERN CIVILIZATION HAS GONE TO SHIT, BECAUSE YOU BELIEVE THAT BOLLOCKS. All your ‘modern’ thrills come from PASSIVE, POINTLESS ECHO OF WHAT COOL ACTUALLY IS, you have NO CLASS STRUCTURE TO SHOW YOU THE TRUTH, YOU CAN SIMPLY SELF MEDICATE, SELF CERTIFY AS COOL, live in a COMIC, where everything is what it looks like from a distance, yet it all falls apart when you stop to look at it UP CLOSE…
The Zen concept of the ‘THE ENEMY’, even the Western ‘Gatekeeper’ that is your FAKE character, is too hard for MOST of you to see at an animal level, because you so desperately need that CHARACTER TO PROTECT YOU FROM EGOIC PAIN, so you can never see it in the now of being it – YOU ‘HAVE’ TO BELIEVE YOUR CHARACTER IS A GOOD THING, the alternative is a level of humiliation that would be UNBEARABLE, particularly for women. We know that here on the LEFT HAND PATH, because we have all had to SEPARATE OURSELVES FROM OUR CHARACTERS, so we don’t BLAME YOU FOR THAT, it is not your fault at an animal level, but it is YOUR PROBLEM, and you are damned if you don’t change your thoughts TO END UP WHERE YOU ARE HEADING – YOUR ENEMY HATES YOU, OBVIOUSLY, SO HOW DO YOU THINK ALWAYS SIDING WITH THE ENEMY, YOUR ANTI-YOU IS GOING TO END, EH? Not well, see however CLEVER you THINK you are, IT IS THE CLEVERNESS OF A CHILD, all smug and safe, thinking they are ‘invisible’ AT THE BACK OF THE CLASSROOM, whilst EVERYONE IS (NOT SO) SECRETLY LAUGHING AT YOU, as you continually HUMILIATE YOURSELF IN PUBLIC, so they ‘like you’…
If it helps at all, (and it should), try and understand that right now you LIVE IN ‘DORK’ WORLD, the tiny little world of a child who knows nothing, a world defined by what you recognize and react to, SO YOU THINK THAT IS THE WHOLE WORLD, because that limited little range of reactions CREATE YOU REALITY, WHAT YOU THINK – YOUR CHARACTER CREATES YOUR REALITY, what you can do or not do in any particular moment. That is NOT REAL, it is simply the childish need to project yourself onto every situation, dumb it down to your own level, and make it understandable, when the majority of what is ACTUALLY THERE is simply WAY OVER YOUR HEAD – it is outside of your life experience, and at a gifted level is way more complex than your childhood patterns could ever understand. But you think you KNOW BETTER, you think your patterns give you some version of the TRUTH, yet they are simply a set of defense mechanisms that STOP YOU FROM EVER KNOWING THE TRUTH – STAYING STUCK AS A CHILD DAMNS YOU TO EVER INCREASING LEVEL OF STOOOOPID, simply because you can NEVER LEARN…
BUT FAR WORSE, AND I MEAN FAR, F.A.R. WORSE – YOU WILL NEVER BE ABLE TO DEVELOP YOURSELF, because of your failure to do the MOST BASIC OF ALL CHILDHOOD THINGS – BECOME AN ADULT, by learning to overpower your ‘INSTINCTS’ INLINE WITH YOUR BIGGER PICTURE, SO YOU ARE NOT COMPELLED TO FOLLOW THEM AS REACTIONS TO THE MOMENT, AS YOUR ONLY CHOICE, AS YOU ALSO HAVE ANOTHER, BIGGER, MORE IMPORTANT PERSPECTIVE. If you DON’T LEARN HOW TO DO THIS YOU ARE DAMNED TO ‘WAIT’ FOR EVERYTHING, ANYTHING TO HAPPEN ‘TO YOU’, AND THEN REACT TO IT VIA YOUR PREDEFINED, CHILDHOOD PATTERNS – YOUR LIFE IS WHAT YOU ‘EXPECT’ TO HAPPEN, NOT WHAT YOU WANT TO HAPPEN AGAINST YOUR STUPID CHILDISH ‘EXPECTATIONS’, WHICH ARE JUST A REACTION TO YOUR CIRCUMSTANCE. AND THIS MAKES YOU LAZY, and frankly unbelievably BORING…
Accept this even if you don’t see it yet – YOU CAN NEVER DECIDE TO STICK TO WHAT YOU WANT TO HAPPEN, what you DECIDED ‘BEFORE’, AS A CHILDISH TWAT, so you can never change, YOU ARE CONTROLLED BY THIS SIMPLE CHILDISH NEED TO WAIT TO REACT. IT IS A ‘SELF-FULFILLING PROPHESY’ – YOU DON’T EVEN TRY AND DECIDE WHAT YOU WANT TO HAPPEN, YOU IMMEDIATELY FOCUS ON WHAT YOU THINK IS GOING TO HAPPEN AS A REACTION. THEN YOUR REACTIONS FALL ONE AFTER THE OTHER LIKE DOMINOES, SUCKING THE LIFE, YOUR ENERGY RIGHT OUT OF YOU, WHICH MAKES YOU FEEL SOMETHING, HOWEVER GOOD, BAD OR INDIFFERENT, FOR A MOMENT, WHICH CHILDREN BECOME ADDICTED TO. SO THE TRICK, OF COURSE, IS TO STOP KNOCKING THAT FIRST DOMINO OVER, AND THEN YOU CAN RECOVER YOURSELF, THE ENERGY YOU NEED TO BE AN ADULT. DO YOU UNDERSTAND – THIS IS WHAT YOUR ADDICTION TO BEING A CHILD IS, HOW IT WORKS, THIS IS WHY YOU DON’T WANT TO GROW THE FUCK UP…
YOUR REACTION TO THE MOMENT IS ‘ALWAYS MORE IMPORTANT TO YOU THE CHILD’, MORE COMPELLING THAN ANYTHING ELSE YOU WANT, YOU RARELY EVEN BOTHER DECIDING WHAT YOU ACTUALLY WANT TO HAPPEN AND IMPOSING IT ON YOUR CIRCUMSTANCES LIKE AN ADULT, IN ADVANCE. SEE A CHILD KNOWS IT IS A SLAVE TO THE GROWN UPS, SO IT WAITS TO BE TOLD WHAT TO DO, and that becomes your whole life – A CHILD IS NEVER ON ‘THE FRONT FOOT’, A CHILD CANNOT CHANGE THEIR OWN REALITY, THEY ONLY ACT IN THE MOMENT OF THAT REACTION. Indeed, WITHOUT ANYTHING TO REACT TO THEY CAN’T DO SHIT, WHICH IS WHY EVERY TEDIOUS LITTLE BASTARD THING THAT HAPPENS BECOMES SO IMPORTANT TO YOU, BECOMES YOUR REALITY – you have no egoic reality without this, WHICH IS WHY WE TEACH YOU TO BE NOTHING FIRST.
Yes, YOU LOVE IT, don’t you, you want to be a CHILD IN ORDER TO COPE WITH BEING A CHILD, ITS A FORM OF INSANITY, A FORM OF CHILDISH ADDICTION TO SWEETIES, AND THAT IS WHY ALL SELF CHANGE, ALL DESIRE TO CHANGE IS A ‘CHOICE’ YOU MUST MAKE. YES, YOU MUST GIVE UP CHILDISH COMFORTS IN ORDER TO GAIN THE COMFORTS OF ELITISM, which is why you think all change is suffering, BUTS IT NOT – all CHANGE IS TO ESCAPE THE SUFFERING OF A CHILD YOU HAVE NORMALISED YOU FOOL. BE CLEAR – YOU HAVE LET FAKE YOU MAKE YOUR EGOIC SUFFERING NORMAL, SO ALL CHANGE LOOKS LIKE YOU ARE GIVING THINGS UP OF VALUE BECAUSE FAKE YOU HAS MADE ‘DRINKING BLEACH TASTE GOOD’, at least in the moment of doing it…
See… you, LITTLE OLD YOU, are a VICTIM OF EVERYTHING AND EVERYONE NOW, but most IMPORTANTLY, YOU ARE VICTIM OF FAKE YOU, simply because you have no idea another way exists, so whenever you TRY AND BE BETTER, YOU ALWAYS FAIL, SOONER OR LATER. So YOU get to watch your life spiral downwards FOR REASONS YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND, becoming less and less as you drift into the bitter, PERMANENTLY UNHAPPY loneliness of the GIFTED WHO NEVER LEARN TO DEVELOPMENT THEMSELVES, who NEVER LEARN THAT EVERYTHING YOU HAVE COMES FROM YOUR ‘SPIRIT’, so you might want to look after that. YOU MUST LOOK AFTER YOUR GIFTED ENERGY LEVELS TO BE ‘HAPPY’, AND NOT BE STRESSED OUT BY NORMAL, EVERYDAY LIFE, which you constantly need to COMFORT YOURSELF TO COPE WITH, whilst your ancestors had to be ready, willing and able to kill other people just to live through the fucking day – SO THEY NEEDED THE COMFORTS OF ELITISM, WHILST SADLY YOU THINK YOU CAN GET AWAY WITHOUT THEM, BUT YOU ARE WRONG.
Yes, this is a post on growing up, IN THE SPIRITUAL SENSE OF IT, which in all truth is all of it, as YOU CAN NOT BE A CHILD ON THE LEFT HAND PATH AND GET ANYWHERE, you have to mature, you have to be ABLE TO STAND AGAINST YOURSELF, YOUR FAKE CHARACTER AND TRY. But you can’t, because your society has removed that from LESSON PLAN – these days you can wander through life as a child, SO YOU NEVER TRY, you expect to be given things FOR NOTHING, SO YOU REMAIN STUCK AT AN ANIMAL LEVEL OF CONSCIOUSNESS, and can’t develop yourself even when you briefly TRY, after some grandiose failure, or burning humiliation, BECAUSE YOU HAVE NO FOUNDATION TO BUILD ON – you have never learned HOW TO BUILD UP FROM ‘NOTHING’, so chasing NOTHING IS ALWAYS MORE IMPORTANT, in the continual stream of some momentary mood swing that is YOUR ENTIRE LIFE…
Yes, given all FOLKS STUCK at an ‘animal level’ (YOU) are stuck in their TINY LITTLE OH SO IMPORTANT ‘MOMENT AGO’ FOREVER, it does not take a genius to see how YOUR DEVELOPMENT ends – YOUR DEVELOPMENT IS ALWAYS LESS IMPORTANT TO FAKE YOU. But you don’t FAIL TO START, you just never bother to do anything other than THINK ABOUT IT, BECAUSE THAT IS ALL FAKE YOU WANNA DO – FANTAZISE, unless Fake You gets some benefit from it, that is, FROM STANDING AGAINST THAT ANIMAL instinct IN THE MOMENT OF HAVING IT. See YOUR Fake You is not one consistent thing, it is a multitude of little YOUs, all screaming like babies, but some of whom can be ‘BROUGHT ON SIDE’ in this quest for BETTER THAN, MUCH AS MANY OF THEM WILL HAVE TO DIE…
So, however remarkable I find the need to write this, to tell you a SECRET YOUR ANCESTORS WERE TAUGHT AS CHILDREN, SO IS NO SECRET AT ALL, know that without this understanding, without a lesson IN HOW TO GROW THE FUCK UP, Part 4 on Radical Character Change is wasted on you, BECAUSE YOU WILL LET YOUR FAKE YOU STOP YOU DOING ANY OF IT, BECAUSE YOU ARE A CHILD – YOU THINK LIKE A CHILD, ACT LIKE A CHILD, FEEL LIKE A CHILD – YOU HAVE NO ‘BOTTLE’, no ability to stand against you animal instincts, let alone THE FALSE INSTINCTS OF FAKE YOU, you can barely hold your bladder in check…
Yes, at an animal level all BOTTLE IS A FORM OF TENSION/RESISTANCE, but that is only the beginning, that is the introduction, the RIGHTS OF PASSAGE, why you need to understand is that at a spiritual level you must learn to ‘have the GRACE to hold yourself while those around you fall’. However much you must start with TENSION, YOU MUST GROW PASSED THAT TO FEEL NO TENSION AT ALL IN ORDER TO BUILD ON TOP OF THAT, because you have the CONFIDENCE IN YOURSELF THAT IS THE SIGNATURE OF THE ARISTOS. See growing up SPIRITUALLY IS MORE THAN JUST BEING TOUGH MENTALLY, PHYSICALLY AND EMOTIONALLY, IT IS BEYOND THAT – YOU MUST NOT JUST SIMPLY BE ABLE TO BEAR EGOIC PAIN OF ANY KIND, YOU MUST ACCEPT IT WITHOUT THE NEED TO TENSE AGAINST IN TIME, and then it stops becoming pain, as that pain was EGOIC, FAKE, AND DID NOT REALLY EXIST. This is how you BURST THE BUBBLE OF BEING A CHILD, you see through it all, all the childishness FEAR/DESIRE/BOREDOM of your childish ego, which is an illusion.
But, Unlike Part 4, which is very technical in nature, this is a very chatty post, as a number of elements need to combine in your mind to get you on this horse, but you must try and hold a bigger picture about CHANGE AT THE SAME TIME. These bigger pictures are discussed below, because there are several of them, but to start you must get x3 simple things:
- TO BE A CHILD IS TO BE ALONE IN THIS UNIVERSE, cut off from your Spirit, YOUR REAL YOU, without any contact with the best thing about you. The adult is an adult because it has contact with its Spirit, its ‘Presence’ in a way it can trust, SO IS NEVER ALONE, AND ALWAYS HAS HELP – YOUR ATTITUDE TO LIFE WILL CHANGE, AS YOU WILL KNOW MORE, AND YOU WILL UNDERSTAND HOW TO KNOW MORE ABOUT ANYTHING YOU WISH TO KNOW MORE ABOUT, AS TRUTH, RATHER THAN OPINION.
- TO GROW UP TAKES A LARGE ABOUT OF ENERGY, as in itself IT is higher level of consciousness than a CHILD, much as that level counts for nothing yet, IT GIVES YOU THE MENTAL MECHANISMS THAT ENABLES ALL DEVELOPMENT ON TOP OF THAT. But that energy must be directed in the right way to be useful, even if those ways seem abstract to you, BECAUSE YOU MUST UNDERSTAND THE LAW OF GIFTED ENERGY CONSERVATION IN ALL THINGS.
- THERE IS NO FUN IN BEING A CHILD, all your FUN is simply the ‘release of anxiety’, so feeling a ‘bit better’ for a moment simply because you normally feel WORSE, as ‘YOUR BASELINE NORMAL STATE’, like a frustrated child, so you are CONTROLLED BY IT, it gets you to CHASE YOUR BASIC, whilst real fun is ABOUT ‘FEELING BETTER THAN, all the motherfucking time – YOU ARE A FOOL who does not realize that what you do to FEEL BETTER MAKES YOU FEEL EVEN WORSE ‘NORMALLY’ BY ‘WEAKENING YOU’.
Now, YOU are stupid, so you don’t understand what I have written above, BECAUSE YOU DON’T HAVE ANY ‘ORDER OF RANK’, OF ‘VALUE’ TO SEE WHAT IS IMPORTANT ‘OVERALL’, and what is not, so you don’t get that its about FREEDOM from your circumstances, AND POWER over yourself. So as a moment of light relief I will write it another way – along time a go a distant relative of mine, a total bastard of a man long dead now, told an 8 y/o me not to listen to anyone, take no advice on what to do or who to be in this world because THEY have no idea what you are doing, so just KNOW THAT THE GREAT TRICK TO BEING HAPPY IS THE LOVE OF A GOOD LOOKING BITCH, AND SUPERNATURAL POWERS – THAT IS WHAT YOU AIM FOR, everything else is just KEEPING SCORE, and ‘you never count your money, when you’re sitting at the table’ (RIP Kenny), as that just means you’re a DORK.
See YOU MUST BE A GROWN UP TO ENJOY LIFE, BECAUSE THEN YOU WILL UNDERSTAND THAT EVERYTHING IMPORTANT EXISTS in A ‘RANK OF SIGNIFICANCE’ – MOST OF YOUR LIFE IS YOUR BASIC, AND RANDOM CHANCE, the life of a SLAVE, WHICH IS NOT WORTH LIVING, BUT YOU DON’T SEE these different levels of VALUE IN DIFFERENT THINGS, YOU JUST SEE ALL THINGS IN THE MOMENT AT THE SAME LEVEL. However HE valued BOTH OF THOSE THINGS as so SIGNIFICANT TO HIM BECAUSE THEY SHOW YOU WHAT FEELING ‘BETTER THAN’ YOU ‘IS’, BETTER THAN ANY TEXT BOOK EVER COULD, AND THAT IS ‘THE BEGINNING A LIFE WORTH LIVING’. But a CHILD does not understand that, a Child has no perspective, so THEY SEE EVERYTHING At THE SAME LEVEL, EVEN HUGE LIFE CHANGING STUFF IS THE SAME LEVEL AS ‘EATING A BISCUIT’ in the momentary mood you live in, so you FUCK UP important things in the same feckless way you spill your drink when you are drunk, BECAUSE YOU DON’T REALIZE THE DIFFERENT ‘SCALES OF RANK’ IN THE MOMENT, YOU THINK IT ALL JUST LIFE, BECAUSE YOU ARE A TOTAL TWAT.
Now, however much you read the above as a light-hearted JOKE from a man with no understanding of spirituality, know that I realized it was meant to teach me ‘SIGNIFICANCE’, TO TEACH ME MY ‘SCALE’ OF WORTHWHILE ‘ACHIEVEMENTS’, TO VALUE BEING ‘BETTER THAN’ THIS OR THAT TEMPORARY FEELING BECAUSE OF BIGGER THINGS WAY MORE IMPORTANT TO ME I HAD ALREADY DECIDED TO DO, as those things are all that matters – YOU ONLY HAVE VALUES IF YOU CAN ADHERE TO THEM IN THE MOMENT, OTHERWISE THEY ARE NOT ‘VALUABLE’, you just delude yourself. For example you don’t understand that THE VALUE OF KEEPING OTHER PEOPLE HAPPY IS A FOOLS ERRAND, A WASTE OF TIME, SO THE VAST MAJORITY OF EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENS TO YOU, VIA ‘OTHER PEOPLE’ IS NOT WORTH EVEN ONE FLEETING THOUGHT, as most are little better than nasty little animals. YET FOR MOST CHILDREN IT IS THE PRIMARY, UNCONSCIOUS ‘VALUE’ THEY LIVE BY, AS IT IS THE FIRST/ONLY VALUE YOU ARE TAUGHT AS A CHILD, SO YOU NEVER GROW OUT OF THAT, and NEVER GROW INTO THE REALIZATION THAT PEOPLE MUST PROVE THEIR VALUE TO YOU, IF THEY ARE TO MERIT ANY ATTENTION, AT ALL!
So today, you need to learn what that means FOR YOU ‘THE ARISTOS’ – TODAY YOU NEED TO LEARN THAT ADULTS HAVE ‘BOTTLE’, WHICH COMES FROM THE FEELING OF THEIR SPIRIT, THEIR ENERGETIC PRESENCE, ADULTS ARE ALWAYS ‘VALUE THEIR OWN COMPANY FIRST’, CARING ONLY FOR THE BEST OF THE REST OF THIS WORLD, AND ADULTS ALL HAVE THE SAME GOAL IN THIS LIFE, TO ‘MAKE DEATH PROUD TO CLAIM THEM’ WHEN THEY HAVE ‘FINISHED’ WHAT THEY INTENDED TO DO, (Sorry, Will…). But I know you were not taught that, YOU WERE NEVER TAUGHT TO greet DEATH with a smile, AND WHEN YOU FEEL THAT BLUE TINGE CREEPING OVER YOUR VISION YOU TELL the OLD CUNT TO WARN THE DEVIL HE’D BETTER HAVE YOUR FUCKING MONEY THIS TIME.
See, DEATH IS GOING TO CLAIM YOU, THERE IS NO ESCAPE FOR EVEN THE HARDIEST DAOIST IMMORTAL, SO MIGHT AS WELL INCLUDE HIM IN YOUR PLAN OF LIFE AS ‘THE FRAMEWORK OF TRUTH’, EVERYDAY, CAUSE WITHOUT THAT TRUTH, WITHOUT REMEMBERING THAT ONE DAY SOON YOU WILL QUITE LITERALLY ‘WAKE UP DEAD’, INDEED TO EVEN PRETEND THAT TRUTH DOES NOT EXIST (LIKE YOU DO) ALREADY MAKES YOU WAY DUMBER THAN YOU COULD EVER KNOW – YOU DENY THE MOST BASIC FACT OF LIFE YOU DORK, THAT IS WHY EVERY FUCKING SPIRITUAL SYSTEM ON THE PLANET MAKES YOU ACCEPT DEATH, AND HAVE A PLAN FOR IT. YES, THAT IS THE POINT OF ALL THESE SANITIZED RELIGIOUS FAIRYTALES – IT DOES NOT MATTER THAT THEY ARE WRONG, IT MATTERS THAT YOU ACCEPT DEATH AND LIVE ACCORDINGLY TO ENABLE THE GREATER ACCEPTANCE OF MORE TRUTH THAT COMES WITH THAT, WHICH IS FAR MORE VALUABLE THAN THAT – IT IS A MENTAL MECHANIM THAT HELPS YOU SEE THE TRUTH. But hey, sure you are right, just to GO BACK TO BEING ‘FOREVER YOUNG’ LIKE AN ANT, SURE BEING TOALLY TERRIFIED AT THE MOMENT OF YOUR DEMISE AND HAVING NO IDEA WHAT IS ABOUT TO HAPPEN WILL WORK OUT JUST FINE.
Yes, I’m serious, see all this Heaven and Hell stuff used to be one of THE MOST EFFECTIVE WAYS TO GROW UP CHILDREN, TO SCARE THEM INTO IT, as it is a mental construct that forces the most basic ‘animal kingdom’ TRUTH ON YOU AS A PATTERN, which sporns many, MANY, OTHER PATTERNS OF TRUTH AS WELL. However much you, as GIFTED SHOULD NOT NEED THIS, the dumbest amongst you may want to have a go now, so work out your own death from the averages of a couple of generations back, leave out the early accidents, then count forward in the diary SO you KNOW approx Month and Year YOU WILL BE DEAD BY, AND THEN PUT A BIG FUCKING PIN IT, as you can start to use it every day to count back to HOW MUCH TIME YOU PROBABLY HAVE LEFT, AT BEST. Literally write it down, look in the mirror now, SEE YOU ARE ALREADY MUCH OLDER THAN YOU THINK YOU ARE, MUCH UGLY, MUCH SICKER, MUCH FATTER, MUCH MORE FUCKING BORING AND CREEPY, and see how you feel ABOUT YOUR LIFE TO COME, YOUR LIFE AS A TEDIOUS ‘LITTLE CHILD’ who has no concept of the basic truth of all in life – YOUR ONGOING DEATH AS A PROCESS THAT IS ALREADY HAPPENING YOU – YOU ARE ACTUALLY DYING RIGHT NOW, YOU TOOL…
It will work wonders for your ability to hold the context of your LIFE CHOICES IN TERMS OF THEIR SIGNIFICANCE, OF THE VALUE OF THIS OR THAT CHEAP THRILL, against what else you might want to ACTUALLY BLOODY DO BEFORE ITS TO DAMN LATE, AND THE ANIMAL ADVANTAGE YOU WERE BORN WITH, YOUR POWER OVER DEATH, FINALLY RUNS OUT. But go on deluding yourself if you like, SURE YOU ARE STILL AS HOT AS YOU WERE AT 17, just maybe start taking all those mirrors in your house down, as being constantly reminded of what you REALLY LOOK LIKE NOW MAY START TO STING A LITTLE.
Fun fact – the majority of you reading this have NO more than 30 years left, and many of you less than 20, SO JUST TRY AND COUNT THE FESTIVALS AND XMAS UP EH, MAKE IT REAL FOR YOU IN TERMS OF ‘YOUR LIFE RUNNING OUT’. 2nd Fun Fact, most of you will have lost 90% of your freedoms, health and choices at least 10 years before you die, so you will only be left with the ability to watch yourself die, in a hospice, where the staff hate you, and wish you DEAD, and your children only get to read about your terror and loneliness in those final years when they pick up you bin bags full of smelly stuff, much as they won’t care either, BECAUSE YOU HAD NO IDEA HOW TO GROW THEM UP EITHER, DO YOU – YOU ACTUALLY ENCOURAGED THEM TO STAY FOREVER YOUNG, JUST LIKE YOU DID, you probably even gave them your pills.
Its ODD REALLY, TO KNOW SPARTANS WERE RIGHT 2,500 YEARS AGO, AS THE POINT OF LIFE AS A MENTAL CONSTRUCT ACTUALLY IS A ‘BEAUTIFUL DEATH’, BUT KNOW THIS IS WHY THINKING ABOUT DEATH IS THE ULTIMATE TEST FOR YOUR LEVEL OF CHILDISHNESS, as the totally delusional amongst will rebel against this TRUTH SO STRONGLY you won’t even be able to consider it for more than a moment, AS YOU NEVER GROWN UP AT ALL, SO HAVE LITTLE OR NO TRUTH IN YOUR LIFE. You are just a little baby really, aren’t you, ALONE IN THE JUNGLE, TERRIFIED OF EVERYTHING AND EVERYONE…
Yes, sorry, did I not say – ALL SPIRITUAL SOCIETY IS ‘THE JUNGLE’, ‘THE ANIMAL KINGDOM’, SURVIVAL OF THE FITTEST AND ALL THAT, AS ITS ABOUT POWER, WHILE ALL YOUR FAKE EQUALITY, SOCIETY, DEMOCRACY AND CIVILIZATION IS A HUMAN MADE INVENTION, which is ultimately designed to CONTROL, ENSLAVE, DIVIDE AND OPPRESS THE POOR, KEEP THEM POWERLESS, AS THE TOP OF YOUR SOCIETY KNOWS PERFECTLY WELL TO THIS DAY. Look out the window you fool, YOU SEE THE POLICE OUT THERE ‘PROTECTING YOU’, the Police are there to PROTECT SOCIETY ‘FROM YOU’, the ‘greater good’ exists as an order of RANK, and right now the GREATER GOOD DOES NOT INCLUDE YOU, DOES IT, YOU ARE CANNON FODDER, EXPENDABLE, AS YOU HAVE NO RANK. But that is cool, you really don’t need the police if you are GIFTED, YOU ARE WAY BETTER OFF IN THE JUNGLE, and who knows, might even grow your dumb ass up a little too.
Yes, to be a GIFTED ADULT is to LIVE AT A BIGGER SCALE OF SIGNIFICANCE IN THE LIGHT OF YOUR INEVITABLE DEATH, above these trivial moments THAT SIMPLY WON’T MATTER AT THE MOMENT OF YOUR DEATH, but the only way for you, at your ANIMAL LEVEL, can get a ‘taste’ of that is to IMAGINE WHAT BEING ‘BRAVE’ WOULD FEEL LIKE, RIGHT NOW, WHAT YOU WOULD DO DIFFERENT IF YOU DID FEEL BRAVE ENOUGH TO DO SOMETHING DIFFERENTLY THAT YOU SECRETLY WANT TO DO, EVEN YEARN TO DO, OUTSIDE OF YOUR EGO SAFTEY, to imagine what an ADULT FEELS LIKE, for a moment at least. That is what it means to BE ALIVE, what the PERMANENT context of your DEATH, HELD IN YOUR HEAD gives you, why every warrior race on the planet used to teach it to its children BEFORE WE ENTERED THE CLASSLESS WORLD WE HAVE NOW, with your Fake Democracy wallpapering over the truth of The Jungle we inhabit that has not changed in THOUSANDS of years, on this planet we live on which we think is OURS, like one more breed of silly little ants, sitting on our silly little ant hill AS KINGS OF THE WORLD. Yes, unless you develop yourself you are little more than VEGETATION…
Yes, sadly you have no idea there is something better in this world better THAN YOUR LIFE, yet you deny it to yourself as you simply don’t know it exists, and even reading this most of you still prefer to be NUMB, oblivious LIKE A SLAVE, BECAUSE IT’S EASIER – YOU HAVE NO ENERGY TO TRY AND BE DIFFERENT SIMPLY BECAUSE YOU WASTE IT ON MAINLINING YOUR silly little NUMBNESS, YOUR ZONING OUT, LIKE A TWAT, so you tell yourself its A ‘CHOICE YOU MAKE TO STAY A CHILD’ CAUSE IT FEELS BETTER, when IN REALITY it is anything but that – IT’S A CIRCULAR TRAP, A NEGATIVE FEEDBACK LOOP OF NOTHINGNESS, as you are simply AN EMPTY VESSEL.
SO UNDERSTAND THE FIRST BIG REVEAL TODAY, ‘CHANGE YOUR MIND’ –
YOU ARE NOT MAKING A CHOICE TO BE A CHILD, YOU ARE STUCK THERE BY YOUR LEVEL, YOU ARE DELUDING YOURSELF JUST TO MAKE YOUR TOTAL FAILURE MORE BEARABLE.
YES, EVERYONE KNOWS YOU CLING ON TO BEING A CHILD BECAUSE YOU ARE SCARED AND HAVE NO CHOICE, AS THEY ARE TOO – RIGHT NOW YOU ARE ONE OF ‘THEM’, NOT ONE OF ‘US’.
SO YOU SIMPLY COMFORT YOURSELF WITH THE COMFORTS OF A CHILD, YOU MAKE THE ‘BEST OF IT’, THE ‘BEST OF NOTHING’, WHICH IS JUST MORE AND MORE NOTHINGNESS, MORE OBLIVION, MORE ZOING OUT, OF MAKING THE LIFE OF A VICTIM INTO SOMETHING ‘COOL’.
SEE YOU TELL YOURSELF YOU WANT TO DO THIS IN ORDER TO FEEL BETTER, WHICH ACTUALLY MAKES YOU SLIGHTLY INSANE – YOU CURRENTLY HAVE NO CHOICE, BECAUSE YOU HAVE NO REALISTIC ‘OTHER’ OPTION, SO YOU JUST GIGGLE ALONG AT YOUR OWN HUMILIATION, ALL BACK OF THE BUS.
TO BE A GIFTED ADULT IS TO ASPIRE TO BEING SIGNIFICANT FOR ITS OWN SAKE, NO MATTER WHO ELSE SEES IT – TO ‘LIVE YOUR LIFE AS ART’.
TO BE A GIFTED CHILD IS TO ASPIRE TO COMFORT, MONEY, SEX, BANAL EGO SAFETY, IT IS TO HIDE FROM LIFE – LIVING OUT A PITIFUL ‘HERD FANTASY’.
SO WHICH WOULD YOU RATHER BE GIVEN THE CHOICE – SIGNIFICANT OR COMFORTABLY NUMB, AN ADULT OR A BABY?
BE CLEAR – THE LIFE OF A SLAVE IS NOT WORTH LIVING, BECAUSE IT IS NOT YOUR LIFE, YOU SIMPLY DO WHAT YOU ARE TOLD, YOU ARE A COPYCAT…
SEE, TO YOU BEING AN ADULT IS ‘AN UNPLEASANT LOOKING OPTION’ BEST AVOIDED, TO US IT’S THE SPIRITUAL EVOLUTION OF THE GODS.
BUT WHEN YOU UNDERSTAND, YOU WILL SEE THAT BEING A CHILD IS SIMPLY DRINKING BLEACH EVERYDAY IN ORDER TO KEEP YOURSELF SICK…
DO YOU GET THIS? WHEN YOU STOP DRINKING THE BLEACH, EVEN BEFORE YOU STOP WANTING TO DRINK THE BLEACH, YOU WILL FIND THE EGOIC BURN WILL BECOME PLEASANT MENTALLY AS AN ACHIEVEMENT. SEE YOU KNOW THAT IS ‘NOT YOU’ SUFFERING, THAT IS YOUR ENEMY SUFFERING BECAUSE YOU REFUSE TO DRINK THE POISON IT IS USING TO KILL YOU, FIRST MENTALLY IN RETROSPECT AS A GOAL YOU HAVE HIT, BUT IT QUICKLY BECOMES THE ENJOYMENT OF ‘WINNING VIA SUFFERING’ IN THE MOMENT. THEN, MAGICALLY, THE ACTUAL FEELING OF EGOIC SUFFERING WILL CHANGE TO ONE OF PLEASURE, OF ENERGY, OF POWER. THIS IS WHAT THE COMFORTS OF ELITISM ARE AS A SENSATION – WHY ‘POWER OVER YOURSELF’ FEELS AMAZING.
WHAT I HAVE JUST WRITTEN IS THE BEST WAY TO SUMMARIZE AND REMEMBER WHAT IT IS TO GROW THE FUCK UP, IF YOU ARE GIFTED – YOUR DESIRE TO DRINK THE BLEACH WILL LEAVE YOU WHEN YOU UNDERSTAND IT IS BLEACH, NOT A CHEAP THRILL, WHICH IS WHY NO ADULT EVERY WANTS TO GO BACK TO BEING A CHILD. EVENTUALLY THE EGOIC SUFFERING WILL GO ALTOGETHER, TO THE POINT THAT MANY SEEKERS ACTUALLY MISS IT AS A SOURCE OF THE FEELING OF POWER, AND RE-ADDICT THEMSELVES TO IT SO THEY STILL SUFFER A LITTLE THROUGH PARTIAL DENIAL (EG SMOKING), BUT MAKE SURE THE COMFORTS YOU CHOOSE FOR THAT ARE THE SMALL ONES, NOT YOUR WASH OUT BASIC SHIT, OR YOU LOSE TO MUCH OF THE BENEFIT. UNDERSTAND?
So, its very useful right now to understand BOTTLE ON A CHILDLIKE LEVEL, WHAT HAVING BOTTLE, THE SIMPLE, STRONG FEELING OF YOUR ENERGETIC PRESENCE ALLOWS YOU TO DO EASILY in the moment. This occurs long before you experience DIGNITY, THE NEXT LEVEL UP FROM BOTTLE, long before you can live ‘PRESENT IN YOUR PRESENCE’ THE STATE THAT ALLOWS YOU DO MAGICAL STUFF, because you have replaced the animal NEED to cycle between your FEAR/DESIRE/BOREDOM like an infant WITH DIGNITY. No, BOTTLE allows YOU to STICK TO WHAT YOU HAVE DECIDED TO DO IN ADVANCE, FOR A PURPOSE ‘HIGHER’ THAN THE MOMENTARY INSTINCTIVE FEELING NOT TO DO IT, AT THE TIME OF TRYING. You could even say that BOTTLE allows you to TRY CONSISTENTLY BECAUSE OTHERWISE YOU CANNOT – YOU HAVE NO ANCHOR TO ATTACH YOUR WILL TO, SO IT IS NEVER CONSISTENT, but having BOTTLE BECOMES A MASTER HABIT AND TRUMPS THIS WEAKNESS OF CHARACTER, BECAUSE YOU TRUST IT TO WORK, EVERYTIME.
Yes, even at A BASIC LEVEL OF BOTTLE CAN BE USED TO COMMAND YOURSELF AND OVERWHELM YOUR DESIRE TO RUN, TO GIVE UP, TO GIVE IN, TO PANIC, by simply setting your AWARENESS on your BOTTLE ON PURPOSE and commanding yourself against these instincts BECAUSE IT IS STRONG ENOUGH TO STOP FAKE YOU CONTROLLING YOU VIA YOUR FAKE INSTINCTS. Therefore the 3 most basic of all ASPECTS OF GROWING UP AT AN ANIMAL LEVEL ARE YOURS TO COMMAND – TO DELAY GRATIFICATION (STAND AGAINST DESIRE), TO PUSH YOURSELF ON WHEN YOU ARE TOO TIRED (STAND AGAINST FEAR), AND AMUSE YOURSELF WHEN THERE IS NOTHING TO REACT TO (STAND AGAINST BOREDOM). In a very real sense BOTTLE STOPS YOU BEING PARALYSED BY MOMENTARY INSTINCTS, WHICH ARE NOT YOU, BECAUSE ‘YOU’ ARE WHAT YOU HAVE ALREADY DECIDED TO DO, WHILST YOUR NEGATIVE REACTION TO THAT DECISION, IN THE MOMENT OF DOING IT, IS ALL FAKE BITCH YOU…
But it is NO use just thinking this, YOU MUST PUT ENERGY INTO THAT STATE, INTO YOUR BOTTLE AT THE TIME TO BE ABLE TO USE IT, RELY ON IT, otherwise you will fail, and that is the key aspect of BEING A GROWN UP YOU MUST UNDERSTAND – you must force that part at the start, to develop a ritual of GETTING UP FOR IT, WHENEVER YOU NEED TO, by simply remembering that this is how BEING AN ADULT WORKS. YOU MUST LEARN HOW TO REACT TO ANY CHALLENGE TO PREVIOUS, ADULT DECISIONS FROM THE MOMENTARY FALSE INSTINCTS OF YOUR FAKE CHILDISH SELF BY ‘BRACING YOURSELF’ WITH THE ENERGY YOU NORMALLY WASTE ON COMFORTING YOURSELF – DO YOU SEE HOW SIMPLE THIS WORKS?
Be clear – at an ANIMAL LEVEL OF CONSCIOUSNESS YOUR BOTTLE IS MADE UP OF THE ENERGY YOU PUT INTO IT AT THE TIME, you will be very weak, YOUR ENERGY SCATTERED TO THE WINDS BY YOUR OVER THINKING, WHICH YOU SEE IN SOME BIZARE WAY AS ACCEPTABLE, EVEN SENSIBLE, SAFER, so your natural LEVEL OF BOTTLE will be very low, and good for nothing. And, Yes, its fine to get mad like a child at the start, as that is likely all you will have OUTSIDE OF PAIN AND SEX AS AN ENERGY SOURCE, but you must not express that ANGER, you must CONTAIN IT, TO BE ABLE TO USE IT – the act of containing it BUILDS YOUR BOTTLE, YOUR HARD SHELL OF RESISTANCE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO OPPOSE FAKE YOU’S FALSE INSTINCTS…
You will then come to see that the TENSION SIGNATURE OF BOTTLE is a form of first physical, then EMOTIONAL RESITANCE IN YOUR BODY, that does not need anger or desire, and can be manipulated by YOUR BODY POSTURE, by putting light tension in set muscle groups as a way to connect to your PRESENCE. Indeed, if you are Gifted at any meaningful level you will DISCOVER THAT YOU ALREADY HAVE THIS ‘TENSION BOTTLE’ (YOU ACTUALLY USE IT), BUT IT IS ONLY LINKED TO YOU BASIC, TO ACTING OUT THE WORST OF YOU AS IT HAS BEEN PERVERTED BY FAKE YOU TO BLEED YOU, TO KEEP YOU STUCK IN THIS SIMPLE TRAP.
You must find this aspect of TENSION IN YOURSELF and reclaim it AS A CHOICE YOU MAKE TO PUT ENERGY INTO THAT POSTURE ON PURPOSE, RATHER THAN JUST A SIDE EFFECT OF ANTICPATING YOUR CREEPY LITTLE ‘WASH OUT’ BASIC. You must LEARN TO EVOKE that tension AT WILL, to do it as a seq of steps AND USE IT ON WHAT YOU WANT WITHOUT FEAR/DESIRE/BOREDOM AS A TRIGGER – DON’T WASTE IT ON your tragic little BASIC, LIKE A TWAT, BUT USE IT ON ‘BEING GIFTED’, LIKE A GOD, AND BUILD IT as a very special connection to your SPIRIT, WHICH FOR MOST OF YOU WILL COME FROM YOUR SEX CENTRE…
EASY EH? YES, ESSENTIALLY IT IS SO EASY YOU SHOULD HAVE FIGURED ALL THIS OUT BEFORE YOU WERE 10 Y/OS, SO EASY THAT I’M NOT EVEN GOING TO MENTION THE MECHANSIM OF HAVING BOTTLE AGAIN UNTIL THE END OF THIS POST. But if you want me to BOIL DOWN THE TEACHING OF THE GREATEST FOLKS WHO EVER LIVED ON THIS PLANET OVER MANY THOUSANDS OF YEARS INTO A LITTLE TIC TOK MEME, as you don’t have the smarts of a goldfish, THEN GO FOR SOMETHING LIKE ‘ARE YOU LIVING THE DREAM, OR SOME OTHER CUNTS NIGHTMARE…?’. Spoiler alert – right now its the 2nd one…
OK – WE START NOW…
ARE READY FOR THE REST OF THIS, CAUSE YOU NEED TO MAKE A CHOICE TO GROW UP, SO YOU NEED TO CHANGE YOUR MIND, which involves changing your state? So lets show you now how to CHOOSE TO DO THIS, REMEMBER TO DO THIS, even when you THINK you don’t NEED THAT STATE OF PRESENCE, OF ‘BOTTLE’ TO GET BY, you do need it IF YOU WANT TO STOP MAKING A TOTAL TWAT of yourself, and failing constantly because you think its ‘dope’, as you don’t think at all, YOU JUST REACT LIKE A CHILD…
THE GREATEST SPUR TO GROWING UP IS TO UNDERSTAND YOU ARE MAKING A FOOL OF YOURSELF, YOU ARE BEING CONNED INTO STAYING A CHILD.
TO UNDERSTAND WHY YOU ARE MAKING A FOOL OF YOURSELF YOU MUST GET SMARTER AND SEE THE ENERGY YOU WASTE ON BEING A CHILD IS THE SAME ENERGY YOU NEED TO GROW UP, AS SAVING THAT ENERGY MAKES YOU ‘WANT TO GROW UP’, IF YOU ARE GIFTED…
THEN YOU MUST CHOOSE TO STOP MAKING A FOOL OF YOUR SELF, BECAUSE YOU NOW BOTH SEE THE CON, AND FEEL THIS WASTE IN REALITY.
THEN YOU WILL WANT TO GROW UP, AS BEING A CHILD IS PATHETIC – THE MORE ENERGY YOU HAVE, THE MORE YOU WANT TO GROW UP – INDEED IT IS THE EASY WAY TO GROW UP, BECAUSE IT WILL THEN BE FORCED ON YOU BY YOUR CONSCIENCE LIKE ITS SUPPOSED TO WORK…
IN THIS SIMPLE WAY YOU WILL UNDERSTAND YOU ARE NOT HAVING FUN AS A CHILD, INDEED FUN AT ANY MEANINGFUL LEVEL ONLY EXISTS FOR ADULTS – YOU WILL START TO UNDERSTAND YOUR FUN IS NOT FUN, YOUR BASIC IS A MOMENTARY CURE FOR ANXIETY, WHICH THEN MAKES IT WORSE NEXT TIME.
REMEMBER THIS – THE COMFORTS OF AN ANIMAL ARE USED TO KEEP YOU WEAK AND STUPID, SO YOU WANT TO STAY WEAK AND STUPID BECAUSE THE ACT OF DOING IT BECOMES A COPING MECHANSIM, THAT IS WHY YOU ARE STUCK AS A GUTLESS CHILD, IT IS HOW YOU COPE WITH ‘EMAIL’.
IN THIS WAY YOU WILL START TO SEE THAT THE KNOWLEDGE OF AN ADULT IS VASTLY SUPERIOR TO THE TRITE CLEVERNESS OF A CHILD, AND YOU WILL START TO BOTH HATE AND FEAR THE FALSE, INSTINCTIVE CLEVERNESS OF FAKE YOU, YOUR CHARACTER OF ‘NO CHARACTER’.
BUT YOU MUST ‘GET UP’ FOR THIS AT THE START, FORCE YOUR SELF TO PUT YOUR ENERGY INTO THE PROCESS, GROWING UP IS NOT PASSIVE, YOU MUST FORCE YOURSELF TO DO IT BY APPLYING THE ENERGY THAT COMES FROM ‘TRYING’, UNTIL YOU BREAK THROUGH YOUR CHILDISH CONFUSION.
GET THIS – TO CHANGE IN EVEN THIS MOST BASIC OF WAYS YOU MUST PUT LARGE AMOUNTS OF ENERGY INTO THE PROCESS, YOU CAN NOT DO IT LIKE YOU DO EVERYTHING ELSE, PASSIVE AND DISINTERESTED, SO YOU MUST FIND IT EXCITING, EVEN EROTIC FOR IT TO WORK FAST.
YES, YOU MUST START TO EXPLORE THE ‘VISCERAL COMFORTS OF ELITISM’ IN ORDER TO ENJOY OVERPOWERING YOUR FAKE BITCH SELF, YOU MUST START TO GET A THRILL OUT OF IT, OUT OF BEING BETTER THAN THAT USELESS LAZY TWAT THAT IS YOUR INNER CHILD.
SO YOU MUST BREAK THE HABIT OF DOING STUFF LIKE YOU DON’T WANT TO DO IT, BECAUSE YOUR FAKE SELF CALLS ANY CHANGE BORING OR HARD – YOU ARE ENGAGING IN THE GREATEST ADVENTURE OF YOUR LIFE, SEE THAT WAY, DON’T LET FAKE YOU RUIN IT FOR YOU WITH FAKE FEELINGS!
ALL ADULT BOTTLE TO STAND AGAINST YOURSELF COMES FROM NEEDING THAT BOTTLE TO DO SOMETHING EXTERNAL, AND THEN LEARNING TO USE THAT BOTTLE MORE AND MORE IN YOUR DAY TO DAY LIFE, EVEN IF YOU DON’T NEED THAT BOTTLE TO LIVE, DO IT ANYWAY, AS AN EXERCISE IN ELITISM!
IN MY EXPERIENCE THIS IS THE ONLY WAY YOU HAVE A CHANCE OF GROWING YOUR SELF UP PAST YOUR EARLY 30S – TO FORCE YOURSELF TO CHANGE TO THE ADULT MODE BECAUSE YOU CHOOSE TO PUT YOURSELF IN HARMS WAY FOR THE ‘HELL OF IT’, AGAINST YOUR FALSE INSTINCTS.
Yes, Growing Up is both a CHOICE and a PROCESS of ENERGY WORK – I WILL REPEAT THIS OFTEN BUT TRY TO REMEMBER THIS, AS IT IS THE KEY TO RAPID PROGRESS – YOU MUST MAKE SPARE ENERGY TO EVEN ‘WANT TO GROW UP’, THAT IS THE FIRST TRICK TO IT, TO WANT ‘MORE THAN THIS’ STUPID LITTLE LIFE OF SLAVERY, BECAUSE THAT IS WHAT TO HAVE SPARE ENERGY FEELS LIKE, when someone like me TELLS YOU WHAT TO DO WITH IT. Without this spare energy you must be forced to GROW UP AGAINST YOUR CHILDISH WILL LIKE A SOLDIER, or to be prepared to ‘HARD SHOCK’ YOURSELF INTO IT LIKE A ZENMAN, much as that is also the most common way of ACCIDENTALLY growing up via ABUSING YOUR ‘BASIC’.
So I need to show you what this is, I need to do something your parents should of done decades ago – FORCE YOU TO ‘WANT TO’ GROW UP, VIA THIS REMOTE LEARNING APPROACH – I NEED TO GET YOU TO WANT TO GROW UP because it is BETTER THAN FAKE YOU, which means the approach taken has to be very specific. In person I could do this too you in a few hours, BUT OVER THE PHONE THIS STUFF IS TOTALLY DIFFERENT – I HAVE TO GET YOUR EXISTING CHARACTER, THAT DOES NOT WANT TO GROW UP, TO UNDERSTAND WHAT GROWING UP IS ENOUGH TO ‘TRY IT’, THEN YOU CAN START TO WANT IT, MORE AND MORE, because you fucking HATE WHAT YOU WERE BEFORE…
See, YOUR ‘FAKE YOU’ NEEDS TO RELATE ‘POSITIVELY’ TO THIS TODAY, TO GROWING UP, so we have to ‘sex it up’ a bit – THIS IS NOT AN ADDITION TO THE OLD WAY, THIS IS A QUESTION OF EMPHASIS ON SOME STUFF AT THE EXPENSE OTHER BITS YOU WILL FIND ‘DUSTY’, much as they are still there – THE HEART OF GROWING UP, THE ‘BASELINE’ IS THE SAME AS PART 4 OF RADICAL CHANGE = DIGNITY. But you are way to fucking slow to get that yet, so we have to get you UP TO SPEED, INDEED YOU NEED TO LEARN WHAT ‘GODS SPEED’ ACTUALLY MEANS – TO BE BADASS CAUSE THAT IS INFINITELY SUPERIOR TO YOUR SADASS…
How do we DO this for YOU? EASY – WE MAKE YOU SMARTER:
TODAY YOU NEED TO OPEN YOU MIND ‘TO’ GET SMARTER, BY GETTING MUCH QUICKER AT ‘SEEING’ STUFF, RICH, IMPORTANT INFORMATION OTHERWISE LOST IN ‘LAYERS OF COMPLEXITY’, SO YOU DON’T SPEND YOUR MENTAL LIFE ‘LOST AND CONFUSED’ WHILE FAKE YOU RUINS YOUR REAL LIFE.
YOU PROBABLY DON’T HAVE THE PATTERN YOU NEED FOR THIS, AND IF YOU DO YOU MOST LIKELY USE IT FOR LITTLE MORE THAN THE CHATTY INNUENDO OF MODERN HOOK-UP CULTURE, BUT EVEN THAT LEVEL IS BETTER THAN NOTHING – AT LEAST YOU SEE THAT ‘FAST’.
SO YOU NEED TO START TO ‘SEE’ MANY OTHER THINGS ‘THAT FAST’, AS THAT IS THE WAY TO ESCAPE BEING ‘LOST IN THE CONFUSION’ OF THE ANIMAL LEVEL – FAKE YOU’S PRIMARY JOB IS TO KEEP YOU IN A TINY MENTAL CELL, LOCKED IN THE BASEMENT OF THE ‘MANSION’ OF YOUR ‘GIFTED MIND’.
THIS ANIMAL LEVEL OF FEAR/DESIRE/BOREDOM KEEPS YOU TRAPPED IN A TINY RANGE OF MENTAL POSSIBILITIES, A TINY SCALE OF MENTAL VISIBILITY, AS FAKE YOU RELYS ON THIS TO HIDE THE TRUTH – YOU DON’T ‘SEE’ WHAT IS HAPPENING MENTALLY, YOU ARE ‘BLINDED’ BY MOOD BASED CONFUSION.
BUT THE KEY REASON YOU NEED THIS INCREASED SPEED OF COGNITION TODAY IS TO BETTER DEFEND YOURSELF AGAINST FAKE YOU, TO TRULY UNDERSTAND THE WONDERFUL PHRASE THAT, IN THE END, ALL GIFTED PEOPLE FALL INTO 2 TYPES ONLY – THE ‘QUICK AND THE DEAD’.
DON’T WORRY, IF YOU ARE GIFTED YOU WERE BORN FAST, YOU ARE NATURALLY ‘QUICK-WITTED’, SO THAT SPEED OF THOUGHT IS ONE OF THE VERY BEST TESTS FOR GIFTED POTENTIAL – TO WATCH THE MICRO EXPRESSIONS DANCE ACROSS THE FACE OF A STRANGER IS A JOY FOR A TEACHER.
PERSONALY, I LOVE IT AND USE IT ALL THE TIME BECAUSE ITS SO ACCURATE – SEE IN THE GIFTED THOSE EXPRESSIONS COME IN LARGE CONTRADICTORY ‘CLUSTERS’ WITH WAVES OF EMOTION, RATHER THAN THE PLODDING, GERIATRIC ‘PULSE OF FALSE INSTINCT’, ALL THAT ANIMALS CAN THINK.
SEE TODAY YOU MUST CHANGE FROM MERELY ‘THINKING ABOUT THIS STUFF AS A HOBBY’ AND START DOING IT, ALL THE TIME, WHENEVER THERE IS AN OPPORTUNITY TO THINK DIFFERENTLY IN EVERYDAY THINGS, WHEN YOU CAN REMEMBER TO THINK DIFFERENTLY BECAUSE IT HELPS YOU.
SO TODAY ‘DOING THIS PATH’ MUST START TO HELP YOU IN ‘THE NOW’, SO YOUR LIFE RESULTS ARE ‘BETTER THAN’ BEFORE.
WE STARTED TO LINK THIS TO YOUR EVERYDAY LIFE IN PART 3.5, NOW WE GO THE NEXT STEP – WE MAKE YOU SMARTER…
See, it’s a good idea not to get LOST IN THE HARDNESS OF ‘DOING’ THIS PATH, SOME FRUSTRATION WITH IT, which you may have read about elsewhere taking decades – THAT IS ONLY TRUE FOR ‘ANIMALS IN A MOOD’. YOU are GIFTED, you were born with the power to do this, ANIMALS ARE NOT – YOUR ANCESTORS DID THIS FOR YOU, VIA SOME EXTREME EXPERIENCE THEY SURVIVED LONG AGO AND FAR AWAY. Be grateful for that, AS THAT MEANS THIS NEXT BIT IS EASY FOR YOU, BECAUSE YOU HAVE A ‘REAL YOU’, a gift TO DO IT FOR YOU, IF YOU ARE SMART ENOUGH TO TAKE THEIR ADVICE AND ‘SEE WHAT IS RIGHT’ FOR YOU IN AMONGST THE COMPLEXITY. Yes, GIFTED ARE ALWAYS WAY SMARTER THAN THEY THINK, it’s the animal level you live at that is the STOOOPID…
Know you would not see anything at all IN THIS COMPLEXITY TODAY if you did not recognize A SHAPE IN IT, A PATTERN OF TRUTH from your REAL self projected ‘through’ those layers, actually made up of those layers, would you. To see anything REAL as a PATTERN IN OTHERWISE ‘RANDOM’ LAYERS OF COMPLEXITY YOU HAVE NO PREVIOUS EXPERIENCE OF MEANS THAT SOMETHING ELSE IN YOU IS GIVING YOU THAT PATTERN. You must start to look for this stuff now, to look for the unexpected rather than the expected, SO YOU CAN GET MUCH FASTER, and start to reverse the colossal dumbing down your little herd has done to you. This will make you BIGGER, big enough to fight Fake You in the moment of its challenge to your authority, AS RIGHT NOW FAKE YOU IS STILL BIGGER THAN YOU ARE…
‘THE GENIUS’ OF REAL YOU IS TRYING TO HELP YOU ALL THE TIME, BUT YOU IGNORE IT AND DEFER TO YOUR FAKE CHARACTER INSTEAD.
YOUR FAKE YOU IS TRIVIAL, ALWAYS REACTING IN THE MOMENT OF TRIVIALITY, SO YOU ARE TRIVIAL, SMALL AND SCATTERED BECAUSE YOU LIVE ‘IN FEAR’, YOUR CONSTANT COMPANION IS YOUR ‘INFERIORITY COMPLEX’.
REAL YOU WILL HELP YOU SEE ALL YOUR FEARS AS SMALL, MOMENTARY, UNIMPORTANT AND UNLIKELY AS A TRANSITION, SO YOU CAN STAND AGAINST THEM AND BENEFIT FROM ACCEPTING THEM AS PART OF BEING YOU, SO YOUR LIFE RESULTS BENEFIT FROM THIS POWER YOU USED TO WASTE.
THE REASON IT WAS WASTED IS THAT YOU ALWAYS RESISTED YOUR FEARS, TRIED TO FIX THEM OR REMOVE THEM, SO THEY GOT STRONGER AND BIGGER, WITH EACH EGOIC REACTION, SO EVEN OPENING EMAIL IS NOW SCARY, BECAUSE FAKE YOU HAS MADE IT SCARY.
SO I MUST HELP YOU OPEN A CHANNEL TO REAL YOU SO IT CAN REACH AND HELP YOU TO MAKE YOU ‘BIGGER’ THAN ‘YOUR MOMENTARY FEARS’ BY USING YOUR FEARS IN THE MOMENT OF HAVING THEM, BY GOING AGAINST THEM UNTIL THEY DISAPPEAR BECAUSE YOU ARE ‘BIGGER THAN THEM’.
YES – FEAR IS NOT ONLY A GOOD THING, IT IS ALSO THE EASIEST WAY TO DO THIS, BECAUSE OVERCOMING YOUR MOMENTARY FEAR BUILDS YOUR COURAGE IN A VERY SPECIFIC WAY, IT BUILDS YOUR ‘BOTTLE’, YOUR ‘HARD SHELL’ THAT IS THE ROOT OF YOUR POSITIVE SELF CONSCIOUSNESS.
SEE YOU MUST LEARN TO GET OUT OF THE MOMENT, WHERE FAKE YOU ‘LIVES’, BY MAKING THOSE MOMENTS MUCH SMALLER AND QUICKER SO YOU CAN DEVALUE THEM AND IGNORE YOUR REACTIONS TO THEM, WHILST SIMPLY MOVING ON TO THE SAME GOAL BEFORE THAT MOMENT ‘HAPPENED’.
THIS DEVALUING OF THE IMPORTANCE, THE URGENCY, THE RELEVANCE OF YOUR MOMENTS IS THE KEY ASPECTS OF BREAKING YOUR STATE OF IDENTIFICATION WITH FAKE YOU, WITH THE WORLD, AND IS THE USE FIRST USE OF THE POWER YOU WILL DEVELOP TODAY.
YES, YOU MUST START TO DEVALUE THE WORLD WITH ALL ITS TRIVIAL MOMENTS, ALL ITS POTENTIAL TO BRANCH OFF AFTER THIS EGOIC REACTIONS OR THAT ONE, SO IN THE WORDS OF RDJr you must LEARN TO ‘FUCK YOUR SMALL TIME FEARS’, WHILST BEING ‘POLITE’ ABOUT IT, SO:
‘LISTEN, SMILE, AGREE, THEN JUST DO WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU WERE GOING TO DO ANYWAY..’.
THIS IS NOT BEING DECIETFUL, THIS IS HOW YOU LEARN TO SLOWLY ‘UNOBLIGATE’ YOURSELF FROM THE EGOIC FEARS THAT CONTROL YOU TOTALLY LIKE A PUPPET IN THE MOMENT, WHATEVER YOU MAKE UP AFTERWARDS, YOU MUST START TO ‘STOP GIVING A DAMN’ ABOUT YOUR MOMENTS, ‘POLITELY’.
YES, YOU MUST UNDERSTAND THAT THE POINT OF POLITENESS IS TO CONCEAL NOT GIVING A FUCK, OUT OF ‘SUPERIORITY OF CHARACTER’ – YOU HAVE BEEN DOING POLITE WRONG FOR FUCKING YEARS, ARISTOS ‘GENTILE’ POLITENESS IS ACTUALLY ‘BADASS’ – WHY IT IS SO POPULAR WITH GANGSTERS.
LIKE SO MANY WORDS IN THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE IT HAS COME TO MEAN ITS ‘EFFECT’, EG KINDNESS, BUT ITS ORIGINAL MEANING IS ILLUSTRATING YOUR ADVANCED LEVEL OF CHARACTER, YOUR LEVEL OF CONSCIOUSNESS, AS YOU MUST TAKE A ‘MOMENT OF SELF CONSCIOUSNESS’ TO ‘BE’ POLITE.
START TO GET USED TO THESE WORDS NOW, THE ORIGINAL MANNERS OF FREEMASONRY BEING ABOUT A BETTER LEVEL OF CHARACTER, AS YOU WILL FIND IT MUCH EASIER TO ACCEPT THEM AS A ‘GENTILE’, WHICH DOES NOT MEAN ‘GENTLE’, IT MEANS THE NEXT LEVEL OF CONSCIOUSNESS UP FROM YOU.
THEN ONE DAY, IN THE FUTURE, YOU WILL FIND YOUR NEED TO REACT TO YOUR MOMENTS WILL BE TOTALLY GONE, AND YOUR MOMENTS WILL BE EITHER USEFUL OR USELESS TO WHAT YOU HAVE ALREADY DECIDED TO DO…
BUT ONE DAY BEFORE THEN, YOU WILL RELATE TO ‘WHY’ THE ODDS ‘SEEM’ AGAINST YOU, BECAUSE YOU NEED THE FEAR OF THOSE ODDS IN ORDER TO PAY FOR YOUR DEVELOPMENT BY OVERCOMING THOSE FEARS, THAT IS THE POINT OF THEM…
YES, THIS MAY NOT BE SPIRITUALITY FOR GANGSTERS 101, BUT IT IS USEFUL TO KNOW THAT ALL DEVELOPMENT IN THE RAW, WITHOUT ‘THE COMFORTS OF RELIGION’, IS ACTUALLY PRETTY BADASS, BECAUSE IT IS NOT FOR PUSSIES – ITS FOR HEDONISTS!
REAL YOU WILL HELP YOU DO THIS BY HELPING YOU SEE WHAT YOU ACTUALLY DOING IN THE MOMENT IN THE ‘CONTEXT OF WHAT YOU WANT’ LONGER TERM, AGAINST YOUR GOALS, RATHER THAN YOUR TRIVIAL ‘REACTION TO THE MOMENT’ CONTROLLED BY YOUR FAKE PATTERNS. REMEMBER YOUR FAKE CHARACTER DOES NOT EXIST AS AN ENTITY, IT IS SIMPLY A COLLECTION OF MOOD BASED PATTERN REACTIONS THAT PROVIDE THE ILLUSION OF CHARACTER, BUT YOU CAN’T STOP HAVING ‘ANY MOMENTS’, IN ORDER TO DESTROY THESE PATTERNS LIKE ZEN FOLK DO. YOU MUST DO THIS THE ARISTOCRATIC WAY, THE ‘WAY OF THE WEST’…
SO NOW UNDERSTAND ‘THE MASTER KEY’ TO THIS – UNDERSTAND THAT THIS ‘BIGGER YOU’ IS A DIFFERENT, BIGGER ‘MOOD’. Some Gifted who have managed to cling onto some small aspect of this since childhood call it LOVE, or their MOJO, BUZZ, JOY, PEACE, et al but in truth it is all of those things and none of them – IT IS HIGHLY PERSONAL TO YOUR GIFT, AND THE FRONT END IS ALWAYS JUST A TINY PART OF IT FROM YOUR REAL YOU. Beneath this introduction, you will find that this MOOD IS SELF-POSSESSION – the MOOD OF POWER that comes from having CONTROL OVER YOURSELF IN THE NOW, the anti FAKE YOU mood of no longer being victim, of HAVING ZERO FUCKS TO GIVE…
YOU MUST ‘PROACTIVELY’ CHANGE FROM THE FLAKEY MOODS OF FAKE YOU, TO ‘THE MOOD’ OF REAL YOU – THEN YOU WILL GET BIGGER CONSCIOUSLY, SO YOU WILL GET SMARTER, AS YOU WILL ABLE TO SEE ‘PAST THIS MOMENT’, LOOK ‘DOWN ON IT’.
THIS NEW MOOD IS NOT NEW AT ALL, IT IS YOUR NATURAL GIFTED MOOD, BUT IT HAS BEEN CORRUPTED BY FAKE YOU, WHO HAS LOWERED YOUR NATURAL MOOD TO THE FEAR-BASED ABERATION OF AN ANIMAL, VIA FAKE PATTERNS OF ‘EGO SAFETY’.
SO TODAY YOU NEED TO FIND ‘THE MOOD MUSIC’ OF ‘YOUR’ REAL YOU, SO YOU CAN LIVE IN THE BIG PICTURE OF YOUR ‘BETTER THAN’, YOUR POINT, YOUR STYLE, YOUR PURPOSE ON THIS PLANET, INSTEAD OF YOUR TRIVIAL, USELESS CHARACTER.
YOU MAY ALREADY KNOW WHAT THIS ‘MUSIC OF YOUR SPIRIT’ IS, IT IS HIGHLY PERSONAL AND RELATED TO YOUR TYPE OF GIFT, BUT IT IS ALWAYS ‘WHERE’ YOU ‘BETTER THAN’, YOUR ‘SUPERIORITY’ TO ALL OTHER FAKE THINGS ‘LIVES’, BY MAKING YOU FEEL THIS SUPERIORITY.
SEE… THAT ‘SPIRITUALLY SUPERIOR FEELING’ IS HOW ‘YOU’ FIND ‘YOU’, AND IT ALWAYS FEELS LIKE THE TOTAL OPPOSITE OF THE ‘FEAR FROM FAKE YOU’, THE INCONSISTENT NOTHINGNESS OF AN ANIMAL AT THE START, SO YOU FEEL ‘BETTER THAN’ BEFORE, ‘HIGHER THAN’.
REMEMBER THIS – A LONG TIME AGO AS A GIFTED CHILD YOU LIVED IN THIS FEELING, YOU WERE ‘OPEN’ TO YOUR EMOTIONAL LIFE EVERY SEC OF EVERY DAY AS A SENSE OF WONDER, BEFORE SOMETHING HURT YOU, SO YOU BUILT A FAKE SET OF EGOIC PATTERNS TO PROTECT YOURSELF.
THOSE PATTERNS ARE WHAT YOU THINK IS YOUR CHARACTER, BUT THEY ARE FAKE, REACTIVE INVENTIONS, YOUR REAL CHARACTER, YOUR PREFERENCES ARE ‘STILL’ IN THE OPENNESS OF YOUR CHILDHOOD, AS THAT WAS REAL YOU…
TODAY YOU ARE GOING TO LOOK FOR THAT ‘MOOD MUSIC’ OF OPENNESS, RATHER THAN TENSION, VERY PRIVATELY, WHILST DITCHING YOUR FAKE CHARACTER AND SURROUNDING YOURSELF WITH THE PATTERNS OF THE GIFTED ARISTOCRAT INSTEAD.
SO IT IS IMPORTANT TO RELATE TO THIS NOW –
YOU MUST START TO ‘LIVE’ AGAIN BY ‘FEELING ALIVE’, RATHER THAN JUST ‘THINK LIFE’, OR ‘REACT TO LIFE’, YOU MUST LET ‘LIFE TALK TO YOU’ AGAIN, AS YOU MUST START TO BE GENEROUS WITH YOURSELF EMOTIONALLY, WHILST BEING GUARDED WITH YOUR SPEECH, THOUGHTS AND MOVEMENTS.
ON THE ARISTOS PATH THIS IS THE TRUE MEANING OF THE WORD ‘DIGNITY’, SO GET USED TO IT…
THE ‘MOOD OF SPIRITUAL DIGNITY’ = CONSCIOUS ‘LEVEL OF THE SELF POSSESSED’
BUT EVEN MORE IMPORTANTLY – DIGNITY CAN DEFEND ITSELF – DIGNITY IS SMARTER.
BE CLEAR – YOUR MOOD MUSIC IS NOT A DRUG, MUCH AS IT WILL FEEL LIKE ‘BETTER THAN’ AS A BASELINE, AND YOU MAY EVEN CURRENTLY CHASE IT VIA DRUGS AS YOU ‘KNOW NOT WHAT YOU DO’, BUT YOU MUST FIND IT FOR REAL, SO IT NEVER LEAVES YOU. WHEN YOU HAVE FOUND YOUR TUNE, YOUR BUZZ, YOU CAN LEARN TO ‘DANCE TO IT’, SO IT ‘RESONATES’ IN YOU, AND MAKE IT LOUDER AND LOUDER, RECREATING YOUR LIFE THROUGH FEELING IT, AND DO WHAT ‘YOU WISH’ WITH YOUR CHARACTER, YOUR LOOK, YOUR ATTITUDES WITHIN THE FRAMEWORK OF THE ARISTOS.
SEE TODAY YOU MUST LEARN HOW TO GET ‘HIGH ON LIFE’, BECAUSE THAT IS HOW ‘BALANCING’ YOUR REAL YOU FEELS, THAT IS HOW AN ‘ARISTOCRAT LIVES’ – LIFE AS A BALANCING ACT, WITHOUT YOUR CURRENT WASTEFUL ‘EXTREMES’ DRIVEN BY THE TRIVIAL MOOD SWINGS OF YOUR FAKE CHARACTER.
Wanna know the quickest way to do this, the MOST infamous ARISTOS SHORT CUT OF THEM ALL?
THE EASIEST WAY TO START THIS CONSISTENT MOOD IS TO ADOPT AN EXTREMELY HIGH VALUATION OF YOURSELF IN PRIVATE, MUCH AS THIS IS NOT ESSENTIAL IT CAN BE MUCH FASTER AS IT GIVES YOU A PLACE ‘TO START’ TO FIND THIS NEW, CONSISTENT MOOD OF ‘YOU THE ARISTOS’.
THIS MOOD IS USUALLY BASED ON SOME PERSONAL WOW FACTOR OR SKILL YOU WERE BORN WITH AND HAVE DEVELOPED AS YOUR ‘BEST QUALITY’, IN TERMS OF ITS EXTERNAL VALIDATION, SO YOU ALREADY USE IT TO COMFORT YOURSELF PRIVATELY, AGAINST FAKE YOU’S VOLATILE MOOD SWINGS.
MANY MID TO HIGHLY GIFTED DO THIS NATURALLY, INDEED IT IS A HAVEN, A HIDEOUT FROM ‘THE SLINGS AND ARROWS OF THE OUTRAGEOUS FORTUNE’ OF THEIR CURRENT ‘MOMENTARY LIFE’, WHICH IS A REALLY GOOD SIGN THAT THIS PATH IS FOR YOU, AS YOU ARE ALREADY ‘ON IT’.
MANY OF YOUR REAL YOUS HAVE ALREADY LATCHED ONTO THIS WOW FACTOR, AND ALREADY USE IT TO HELP YOU, TO EVEN SHOW YOU WHAT TO DO BY LETTING YOU KNOW YOU ARE BETTER THAN THIS MOMENT, BY USING IT AS A DEVICE TO ‘MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER THAN’ THIS MOMENT.
SEE FOR SOME OF YOU THAT WOW FACTOR IS A DIRECT CONNECTION TO THE GIFT OF YOUR ANCESTORS, TO WHAT THEY HAD OR DID IN TERMS OF ITS ‘HIGHER QUALITY’, SO IT IS MUCH EASIER FOR YOUR REAL YOU TO REACH YOU THROUGH THIS, AND PUT YOU IN THE MOOD OF YOUR ‘PERSONAL GIFT’.
HOWEVER MUCH YOU WANT TO BUY INTO THIS BIT, KNOW THAT IF YOU HAVE NO OR A LOW VALUATION OF YOURSELF (ACTUALLY VERY RARE IN SPIRITED GIFTED TYPES BUT VERY COMMON FOR ANIMALS) THEN YOU WILL BE MUCH MORE ‘VUNERABLE’ TO MOMENTARY CONFUSION, AS YOU HAVE NO ‘ANCHOR’ TO HOLD YOU STEADY AT THE START, NO FEELING TO BUILD YOUR BETTER THAN UP FROM THAT YOU ALREADY USE.
SO DON’T UNDER ESTIMATE THE POWER OF THIS SIMPLE TRICK, FOR MANY OF YOU IT’S NOT A TRICK AT ALL, IT IS REAL YOU CONNECTING YOU BACK ACROSS TIME AND SPACE TO YOUR GIFTED ANCESTORS, AND IS ‘THE BEST THING’ ABOUT YOU, FOR REAL…
Spooky eh? And all this time you just thought you had ‘good hair’ by genetic animal chance, whilst in reality that feature is a byproduct of something else much more valuable. So you might want to start to pay attention to your ‘eyes’, also, as most GIFTED STRUGGLE TO LOOK DIRECTLY INTO THEM, so avoid it after childhood…
Now, please get WHY I AM INTRODUCING THIS SUPERNATURAL ASPECT into a post about a ‘GROWING UP’, a set of routines, so take a moment now to GRASP THIS – YOUR REAL YOU, YOUR GIFT AS A TYPE HAS A PREFERRED FORM OF DEVELOPMENT, USUALLY AN EXISTING 4TH WAY ‘TRADITION’ THAT WORKS THE BEST FOR IT. To force your gift into a different tradition is a MISTAKE, which can be very costly in terms of ‘time’, SO IT IS A REALLY GOOD IDEA TO START TO SEE WHAT WORKS BEST FOR YOU, IN AMONGST THE MUCH WIDER SPREAD OF METHODS I USE THAN MOST OTHERS, WHO STICK TO JUST ONE TRADITION, OFTEN BELIEVING IT IS THE ONLY ONE THAT WORKS, like a well-meaning fool. There IS no 1 PROCESS as a set of methods, there are literally hundreds, most of which are too dry and dusty to understand for modern folks, HENCE WHY I AM GIVING THIS RANGE OF STUFF.
I want you to PROGRESS FAST, so I know you need to use what is perfect for YOUR GIFT or as near as, so everything up to this point has been generic, given you are a GIFTED HEDONIST, which is in itself a BROAD TYPE AS A ‘FAMILY OF TYPES’, and even this does not suit all possible GIFTED cases, eg people who become GIFTED via organized Western religion DON’T DO WELL WITH THIS METHOD. I know many Western GIFTED who have wasted decades of their lives on East Asian methods believing they are generic, BUT THEY ARE NOT. Much as Zen took me a long way, and I often return to it even now, I KNOW IT IS NOT THE PREFFERED METHOD OF MY GIFT, and hence many years at the start of my development were wasted, LOST IN THE CONFUSION OF WHAT I KNEW WAS RIGHT BUT WHAT SIMPLY DID NOT WORK FAST ENOUGH TO GET ME PASSED MY MENTAL BLOCKS – THE MOOD MUSIC OF ZEN IS NOT QUITE RIGHT FOR ME, FOR MY GIFT, SO ‘IT CLASHED’.
But worse than this, if you are GIFTED on both sides of your family, if you have a ‘competing GIFT’ as I do, you will find that even when you find something that works you can bounce back and forth between other stuff, PARTICULARLY IF YOU ARE MIXED RACE/MIXED CULTURE, as those GIFTs can be VERY different, BUT COMBINED CAN BECOME VERY POWERFUL FORCE AGAINST FAKE YOU. You must REALLY LEARN TO LISTEN TO YOUR REAL SELF BEFORE ‘PICKING A SIDE’, so BE CLEAR – to know what is right for you is a massive speed up, even at the beginning when it is usually just a little tweak in a generic method, AS IT STRENGTHENS YOU TO THE POINT YOU WILL FEEL THIS NEW ‘STRENGTH OF PURPOSE’ AS AN EMOTION, as something different you have not felt before, LIKE ‘YOUR GOD IS WALKING WITH YOU’, or for the none religiously educated as a ‘positive presence’, THAT MAKES YOU CONFIDENT. Nothing I can do remotely WILL MAKE YOU AS SMART AS THIS WILL, but I can start to feed you the TRUE complexity of this path so Real You can try and ‘pick the bones out of it’ TO HELP YOU…
Do you understand this? Today I can’t tell you what the ideal method is for you BECAUSE I DON’T KNOW YOUR TYPE, and even the generic stuff I am giving you will only work quickly for the classic Western Gifts, the folks who have a Mediterranean, Scandinavian, Celtic or Near Eastern style Gift. These Gifts I know well to the point of slight boredom with them, so even if you are one of the more ancient Scots, Irish or Northern English whose ancestors escaped the cultural invasions of the last 2,500 years, simply because you had fuck all worth taking, you are still well catered for in my methods, in what I will tell you today. However, if your Gift originated in one of those ‘Lands of the Gods’, in that closed region of the Northern Indian/Pakistani Subcontinent, of the wastelands of the Middle East, in that dark corner of Southeast Asia, in that band of deepest jungle in central Africa, the deserted heartlands of the Russian Steppe or, God Forbid, one of those 4 archaic Indonesian Islands, Tibet or the high Andes that have never stopped following their (very) dark Shamanic practices, then YOU NEED TO LISTEN TO THE ADVICE OF REAL YOU.
But, and it’s a big ass fuck of a BUT, I CAN GET YOU ‘IN THE ROOM’ TODAY, I CAN PUT ENOUGH TRUTH IN YOUR WAY SO AS TO MAKE IT EASY FOR YOUR REAL YOU TO ‘REACH YOU’, start to guide you, start to set your preferences, your interests, your TASTE IN WHAT IS RIGHT FOR YOU – you must try and find what ‘agrees with you’ FROM A NEW LEVEL OF LAYERED COMPLEXITY I WILL INTRODUCE TO YOU TODAY, as from now on YOU MUST MAKE THAT CHOICE OF RIGHT OR WRONG, NOT ME, NOT ANYONE ELSE. Yes, you must STILL follow the basic method I GIVE YOU, BUT YOU MUST START TO SEE WHAT THAT MEANS FOR YOU, YOU MUST REFINE IT TO SUIT YOURSELF, so it is MORE EFFECTIVE, SO IT WORKS FASTER, AND FASTER, AS THAT IS THE ONLY WAY MANY OF YOU HAVE A CHANCE TO BREAK FAKE YOU AT THE START WITHOUT ANY LENGHTY, MAJOR ‘WARS’…
Therefore embrace this ‘Complexity’ today, go looking for it, LOOK FOR WHAT INTERESTS YOU IN THIS NEW ‘BIG PICTURE’ STUFF, look for what YOUR ‘HEROES JOURNEY’ IS MEANT TO BE ABOUT. See, for all of those lost in the Gen Z culture of the formulaic ‘Marvel Universe’ YOUR HEROES JOURNEY IS ‘JUST’ THE PATH TO BECOMING ‘BETTER THAN’, becoming THE HERO IN YOU, it is not what you do when you get there, which is no ones business but your own. But to get there, TO LIVE IN THAT UNDISCOVERED COUNTRY THAT IS REAL YOU, I have to get you past this first tiny little step of BREAKING YOUR SLAVERY TO THE INTENSE MEDIOCRITY OF FAKE YOU, so you can stop merely EXISTING, and start to LIVE. See right now as a slave controlled by animal fear all you want to do is COMFORTUABLY EXIST A LITTLE BIT LONGER, as that is, in truth, ALL your happiness, BECAUSE OUTSIDE OF THE MOMENTS OF YOUR HEDONISM, WHEN YOU BRIEFLY ‘LOSE YOUR FAKE SELF’, THAT IS ALL YOUR LIFE IS, ALL IT CAN EVER BE FOR A FAKE ANIMAL. But you are GIFTED….
See this NOW – know that right now you are simply BAMBI TRYING TO ICE SKATE, you are trying to find your feet in a new world you do not even know exists because YOU HAVE BEEN BROUGHT UP TO BE LITTLE MORE THAN AN ORGANIC ROBOT. There is a vast new world of CONSCIOUSNESS WAITING FOR YOU IF YOU PERSIST PAST THE MINOR TROUBLE OF BREAKING YOUR FAKE YOU BY STOPPING YOUR FAKE BASIC, the greatest loss of your GIFT that your Fake Self has made seem so bloody cool, but in reality you don’t even like. So if you find yourself stuck some repetitive challenge, that you perhaps both love and hate, do remind yourself, no matter how sweet you wish to be, their victory is your defeat, their happiness is your humiliation, their benefit is your loss, their… well I’m sure you get the picture, SO DO THE MATH, YOU ARE PAYING FOR SOMETHING YOU ALREADY OWN, you’re JUST TOO STOOOPID TO SEE IT, SO YOU JUST GO ON WITH YOUR PETTY OBLIGATIONS INSTEAD – ahh the comfort of being an ‘anonymous nothing’, WHILST WAITING FOR THE TRUTH…
And the truth is SIMPLE – You have no idea what is waiting for you ON THE OTHER SHORE, so you are SHY, SO LETS TRY AND BUILD YOUR ANTICIPATION OF WHAT IT MIGHT BE BASED ON THESE BIG PICTURE REVEALS TODAY, because it is not what you think it is, some BUDDHIST Nirvana or Bliss State, IT IS A MUCH BETTER VERSION OF WHAT YOUR CURRENTLY CHASE. Trust me, it will be a damn site more FUN than living like some middle-aged ‘CHUBBY’ clapping along at the back with a glass of someone else’s cheap wine whilst SEEKING TO HUMILIATE OTHERS AS THEIR ONE REMAINING NARCISSISTIC PLEASURE = ‘TERMINAL’ PARASITE. In the end no amount of ‘PR’ will fix that shit, CAUSE EVERYONE HATES A FAKE, GUTLESS TWAT, EVEN THE OTHER ANIMALS CAN ‘SMELL’ IT ON THEM. So how do we move you ON from this LITTLE SHIT SHOW, FAST..?
First we will break with TRADITION and tell you the POINT OF THIS METHOD, so you can be prepared for the BEST YOUR FAKE ANTI-HERO HAS GOT, so you can see that FIGHT BACK COMING, AND KNOW WHAT IT IS WHEN IT HAPPENS. See TODAY I need to make you cleverer, so you UNDERSTAND MUCH MORE ABOUT THIS TOPIC, otherwise you will not be able to DEFEND YOURSELF, AND ALL OF THIS WILL BE FOR NOTHING. Today you MUST LOOK UP ABOVE IT AND START TO SEE ‘THE BIG PICTURE’, start to see that this is just the INTRODUCTION TO SPIRITUALITY, just ‘ESCAPING’ THE PRISON YOU LIVE IN, and is frankly a TINY fraction of what it about. See, this first little bit is really simple, really easy, and really quick IF YOU CAN SEE IT IN RELATION TO THE REST OF IT, see it as the ‘start’ of a much LARGER SCALE PROCESS, rather than be dominated by the master pattern of Ego Defense your Fake YOU relies on – to engage in anything new like its shit, wrong, bad, SO IF YOU FAIL ITS ‘NOT YOUR FAULT’, which obviously makes it almost impossible for you to ‘win’, AS YOU ACTUALLY WANT TO FAIL.
Then, I need to give you some DIRECTION, now, give you a compass you can use to check if YOU ARE ON THE RIGHT TRACK as a form of defense AGAINST FAKE YOU, as a FORM OF RE-ASSURANCE. See BEING ‘OPEN MINDED’ MEANS SOMETHING MORE than just pretending to be slightly more LIBERALLY MINDED for an hour or 2, IT MEANS STARTING TO SEE THE BIGGER PICTURE OF SPIRITUALITY, beyond the goals of this specific method, AS THAT WILL GIVE YOU ‘DIRECTION’, which will become VERY IMPORTANT, once you have escaped the ‘CAGE OF SLAVERY TO DELUSION’ you currently live in. But given the weakness of modern people, the lack of moral fiber, I HAVE FOUND IT VERY USEFUL TO LINK SEVERAL FUTURE TOPICS TO THE ‘NOW’ OF THE METHOD IN ORDER TO HELP THIS DEFENSE, by making them relatable to stuff you are doing now, to HELP YOUR DEFENSE AND ‘GET QUICKER’ AT SEEING THE ATTACKS OF FAKE YOU, so stopping it ‘wearing you down’…
You need what Football managers call some ‘Early Momentum’, as many Gifted Hedonists who FAIL radical character change FAIL RIGHT AT THE START, AND THEN GET MUCH, MUCH WORSE AT LIFE, AS ALL THEIR ILLUSIONS of ‘GOODNESS’ EVAPORATE, SO THEY ACCEPT THEIR FAKE ANTI HERO AS ‘WHO THEY ARE’ – THEY ARE A ‘SKANK’ BY NATURE, MIGHT AS WELL TRY AND HAVE SOME FUN EH, AS YOU KNOW YOU ARE WORTHLESS NOW BUT WHAT THE FUCK, YOU ARE STILL AWESOME AT ‘SELF DESTRUCTION’. Their life becomes the constant humiliation of chasing the faded glory of the obvious, TWATY, middle-class ‘SADASS’, the ‘oldest swinger in town’, a worthless addict who ‘won’t look in the mirror in the light of day’. Truly a fate worse than death, SO YOU DON’T WANT THAT, DO YOU, you want to be BETTER THAN that, hell those are the people you currently ‘take the piss out’ of, aren’t they, YOUR NOT SO STUPID AS TO FALL INTO THAT SIMPLE ‘PROJECTION OF YOUR OWN FUTURE’ onto others? Are you..?
So you MUST UNDERSTAND NOW – THE FIRST POINT OF RASING YOUR LEVEL OF CONSCIOUS VIA USING THE METHOD IN THIS POST IS TO BREAK YOUR FAKE ANTI-HERO’S ‘GOAL’, YOUR ENEMIES ‘HOLD OVER YOU’, WHICH IS YOUR TENDENCY TO ‘LEAK’ YOUR GIFT, YOUR ‘INCONTINENCE’ as they say in Zen. So we teach them together AS A POSITIVE FEEDBACK LOOP…
Now stay with me on this ‘Expose’ of YOUR BASIC, as it will be used to make a big POINT TO YOU AT THE END OF THIS BIT, so it has to be detailed and complex…
ALL HIGHLY GIFTED HEDONISTS THINK THEIR ‘BASIC IS THEIR COOL’, THE BEST THING ABOUT THEM, THEIR SUPERPOWER.
THEY WILL STICK TO THIS EVEN WHEN THEY KNOW ITS KILLING THEM, EVEN IN THEIR DARKEST HOURS NEXT DAY, WHICH THEY SOON FORGET.
THIS CAN NOT BE CHANGED BY ‘TALKING THERAPY’, YOU CAN NOT DECIDE TO ‘GIVE UP SOMETHING YOU LOVE’ – NOT UNTIL YOU ARE NEAR DEATH.
THE HARDEST PART IS TO UNDERSTAND YOUR BASIC IS USUALLY A PERVERTED FORM OF YOUR GIFT, THAT FAKE YOU IS USING TO STEAL FROM YOU.
IN REALITY YOUR BASIC, YOUR ANTI-HERO ‘COOL’ IS WHAT ZEN FOLKS CALL ‘INCONTINENCE’ – YOU ARE JUST PISSING YOURSELF AWAY EVERY TIME.
SEE, NO MATTER WHAT YOU DO TO DEVELOP YOUR POWER, IF YOU DON’T FIX THE BAD LEAKS, THE WORST OF YOUR BASIC, IT WILL ALL BE FOR NOTHING…
THIS IS WHY IT HAS TO BE DONE ‘FIRST’ AS PART OF YOUR GROWTH, AND DONE ‘PROPERLY’ FOR ‘RADICAL CHANGE’.
Now we can’t show you WHAT YOUR BASIC SHOULD ACTUALLY BE AS PART OF YOUR GIFT, how to use it to BENEFIT YOU, rather than let Fake You BLEED YOU OUT, like a pig hung up by your ankles as you slowly die. But we can use A detailed and complex method to BREAK YOUR ATTACHMENT TO IT BY ‘SEEING THROUGH IT’, by seeing the CON of it. See there is no point today going on and on about YOUR SELF DESTRUCTION, much as you need this NEW PATTERN OF UNDERSTANDING TO BE READY, right now you won’t care about the change ENOUGH to give up your BASIC, unless you get really, REALLY SCARED ONE DAY, and even that won’t last. You have TO ‘SEE IT’ YOURSELF, SEE THE PUBLIC HUMILIATION OF IT, BY USING A TEMPORARY INCREASE IN YOUR LEVEL OF CONSCIOUSNESS TO LESSEN YOUR STATE OF IDENTIFICATION OVER TIME, UNTIL IT ‘HITS’ YOU.
Below I will describe the method WE WILL USE TODAY in a WAY YOU CAN SEE THE POINT OF ALL 3 ELEMENTS OF IT, but for now try and see the beauty of this approach – you must LESSEN YOUR STATE OF FEAR, in order TO INCREASE YOUR LEVEL OF CONSCIOUSNESS, in order to LESSEN YOUR STATE OF IDENTIFICATION, and SO STOP YOUR INCONTINENCE, as you will stop ‘wanting’ to do it BECAUSE YOU WILL WANT TO DO SOMETHING ELSE WITH YOUR GIFT INSTEAD. Please get this now – I NEED TO MAKE YOU CLEVERER TODAY, AND THE WAY YOU GET CLEVERER IS BY UNDERSTANDING CLEVER STUFF, like this.
So, having said that Talking this out does not work and is simply a preparation for later, there are a couple of bits of information you can know now THAT WILL HELP SOFT THE BLOW WHEN IT HAPPENS LATER, as they will help you to DE-VAULE YOUR BASIC ‘NOW’, much as you still won’t be able to stop. See knowing this next bit logically will get you TO POSITION YOUR FAKE ANTI-HERO IN REALITY, BY COMPARISON WITH OTHERS, which will dramatically lessen the LOSS you feel when it ‘happens’. This speech consists of 3 simple things, things that are very close to my own heart, as I really struggled with my BASIC, as it was by FAR THE BEST THING ABOUT ME, AND WORSE, I NEEDED IT TO ‘SURVIVE’. Now, that sounds like an excuse because it is – ‘I’ DID NOT NEED MY ANTI-HERO, BUT MY CHOSEN REALITY, THE ILLUSION IN MY HEAD NEEDED MY ANTI-HERO TO SURVIVE. So I had to change the World I lived in WHILE I WAS STILL LIVING IN IT, just as some of you might have too, AS IT CAN BE THAT POWERFUL.
If you are LUCKY this next bit will change your opinion of yourself enough to start to see your BASIC FOR WHAT IT IS – A CURSE, and I mean an actual curse, as it is the source of every single one of your problems, your decline and public humiliation. See, your very CHOICE of personal basic, your preference for your type of basic is the signature of Fake You, THE ANTI-YOU, as it is the perversion of your GIFT in order to bleed you dry IN THE MOST EFFECTIVE WAY POSSIBLE, FOR YOU. Your identification with this process as COOL IS BEST ADDRESSED BEFORE YOU LOSE THIS IDENTIFICATION WITH IT, and much else besides, so you are ready for that loss after the method in this post does its work – YOU MUST UNDERSTAND YOUR BASIC BETTER ‘TODAY’, IN ORDER TO GET SMARTER ‘LATER’.
So read the below and know what your BASIC ACTUALLY IS IN REALITY, but please note – most folks assign the worse of the hedonism as the biggest loss of their GIFT via extremely basic behaviours, the ‘black-out’ stuff you barely remember 5miuns later, HOWEVER as you age you NATURALLY lose the opportunities for this hedonism so the WORST OF YOUR BASIC TRANSITIONS OVER TO MUCH LESS DRAMATIC BUT MUCH MORE FREQUENT activities. This is all things Narcissism, ALL THINGS ‘NASTY, GUTLESS BITCH’, YOUR SECRET LIVES, controls and manipulations, your OBSSESSIVE CLEVERNESS, your need to be right, your self-destructive anger, your obsession with power for its own sake, etc etc. Therefore know that as you age the perception you are ‘not as bad’ as you used to be is usually a lie, if anything you usually get even more BASIC, just in more socially acceptable ways that YOU CAN HIDE MUCH BETTER – ‘LITTLE AND OFTEN’ ALWAYS BECOMES ‘WORSE THAN’.
Having said this many GIFTED cling onto their Hedonistic Basic well into old age, by designing their whole life, relationships, sexual preferences, career etc around providing ‘opportunities to chase their basic’, OFTEN BECOMING EXTREMELY TWISTED AND STRANGE IN THE PROCESS, AS THEY TEND TO CHASE THE GIFT OF OTHERS LIKE PARASITES. But the majority of Highly Gifted, who still have a strong enough Real You to balance them, GO THE SECRET LIFE route, living out their Hedonism ‘behind the scenes’ whilst aging gracefully in public – THESE PEOPLE MAKE UP THE VERY BEST CANDIDATES FOR MY 4TH WAY. See, they have already ‘normalized’ a pattern that they will need to DEVELOP THEMSELVES – THE SEPARATION OF THEIR PUBLIC AND PRIVATE LIVES. Indeed, you can say that this is yet another example of their Fake Self perverting a TRUE aspect of being GIFTED to use it to BLEED THEM INSTEAD OF DEVELOP THEM, and there are many such examples of this that it is useful to know later – SO WE DON’T THROW THE BABY OUT WITH THE BATH WATER ON THIS PATH.
So know this now:
- Your Basic is a ‘Fantasy’ –
- You are ‘Shit’ at your Basic –
- Your Basic is Designed to be a ‘Humiliation’ –
As a personal commentary, none of this was enough for me to STOP, indeed it made me worse in some respects, BUT IT DID PREPARE ME FOR THE CHANGE, and that is the point, cause I then wanted to stop – BEFORE I UNDERSTOOD THE ABOVE I DID NOT WANT TO CHANGE, I WANTED SPIRITUALITY TO MAKE ME ‘BETTER AT MY BASIC’, just like you do now. Afterward, I realized I would only get BETTER THAN after I GREW UP FROM MY BASIC AND STARTED USING THE ROOT CAUSE OF IT TO BE ‘ME’ – YOUR BASIC IS A COFFIN NAIL THAT ‘HOLDS YOU DOWN’, A PERVERSION OF YOUR GIFT, THAT IS THE POINT OF IT, THAT IS WHY IT WORKS FOR FAKE YOU – YOUR BASIC IS THE WORST WASTE OF YOUR GIFT, that is why Fake You has made you DO your BASIC, BY LYING ABOUT WHAT IT IS.
I was lucky as I already knew 1., that my view of my basic IN ACTION was a fantasy, AN IDEALIZED ILLUSION, I’d seen myself in the 3rd person via technology several times and been shocked by the reality of it, but honestly the initial effect of this was to try and make it more stylish, more attractive, TO THE POINT THAT I BECAME SLIGHTLY OBSESSED WITH ‘THE LOOK’ OF IT, rather than stop. However it took me a long time to get 2., to see that I was so GOOD at my basic ONLY because I unconsciously only used others who were so far beneath my animal abilities, skills and experience, but when MATCHED AGAINST MY OWN LEVEL, SADLY VERY RARE IN MY ENVIRONMENT AT THE TIME, MY BASIC WAS NOT ALL THAT. Again, this only caused me to go looking for MORE challenge, like some samurai sword master with a secret death wish, LOOKING FOR ‘BETTER THAN’ IN ALL THE WRONG PLACES.
The real sticking point for me was 3. – in my case I could not accept 3. at all, because it felt like the exact opposite, I ONLY REALIZED THIS MUCH LATER WHEN I SAW WHAT MY BASIC DID TO ‘ME’ ON PURPOSE AFTERWARDS, ITS END RESULT, AND THEREFORE STARTED TO SEE THAT END RESULT AS PART OF THE PROCESS AT THE TIME, WHICH REALLY HELPED ME DEVALUE THE BEST THING ABOUT ME – IN REALITY IT WAS AKIN TO DRINKING ‘DRAINO’ WHILST PRETENDING IT WAS ‘THE ELIXIR OF YOUTH’, THINKING IT TASTED NICE. Modern folks tend to be luckier with this, as they are brought up in the ‘Everything that Kills Me, Makes Me FEEL ALIVE’ generation, (Sorry, One Republic), so its a much smaller jump to GET THAT IT ONLY MAKES YOU FEEL ALIVE ‘BECAUSE’ ITS KILLING YOU. See FAKE YOU HIDES THE FEELING OF DEATH in it, the ‘SICKENING WEAKNESS’ UNDER THE ‘PETTY ALIVE’, BY GETTING YOU TO AMPLIFY THE ALIVE VIA FORCED ‘ANTICIPATION’ – in reality the feeling of DEATH IS ACTUALLY MUCH STRONGER, LONGER AND UNPLESANT, WHILE THE FEELING OF ALIVE IS A TINY MOMENTARY ‘RUSH’, YOU HAVE BECOME ‘OVER-SENSITIVE’ TO, THAT DISAPPEARS AS SOON AS YOUR SENSITIVITY DECLINES A LITTLE BIT.
It is a very good idea to be VERY CLEAR ABOUT THIS THEORETICALLY now, so you are ready when happens, why I have already detailed a process for it in the previous Post 3.5. The feeling of intense aliveness is created by the REFLECTION OF THE DEATH in it, the momentary ‘rush of danger’ ARITIFICALLY INCREASED VIA ANTICIPATION. There are much better ways to do FEEL GOOD which don’t age you, hurt you, KILL YOU, which is TO BECOME SENSITIVE TO YOUR GIFT INSTEAD OF YOUR ANIMAL, AND THE EFFECT OF THE GIFTS OF OTHERS ‘ON YOU’ = SPIRITUAL HEDONSIM, WHICH YOU SHOULD START TO PRACTISE NOW TO AID THIS TRANSITION. See, after you ‘see’ this aspect of your Basic, see your feelings whilst in the process of it, YOU WILL CHANGE, AND YOU WILL FEEL THE LOSS AT THE TIME OF THAT LOSS, feel the INTENSE WEAKNESS IN THE ‘NOW OF IT’, which is frankly quite ‘shocking’, as then you will start to understand what you have done to yourself over the years, thinking it was FUN. MOST ARE ECSTATIC TO LOSE ALL INTEREST IN THEIR GRUBBY LITTLE BASIC, BUT it is best to also be aware that many people become at least a little DISTURBED BY THIS CHANGE, to the point that it effects their development NEGATIVELY, normally because they have just been HEDGING THEIR BETS UP TILL THAT POINT, seeing development as a hobby, or ‘in the future’, SO ARE ‘PUT OFF’ TO LOSE THEIR BASIC FUN, even when they FEEL ‘BETTER THAN’.
See when you HIT this point you are COMMITTED, YOU HAVE BURNT YOUR BOATS, AND YOU CANNOT GO BACK, so most teachers don’t tell you this until after it has happened, as they think it is better to apologize FOR THE CONFUSION AFTERWARD rather than create doubt beforehand. But then most teachers don’t want HIGHLY GIFTED, the real individuals of the world, they want greater numbers of lowly gifted who rub along better together, WHILST HIGHLY GIFTED ONLY TEND TO GET ON WITH OTHER HIGHLY GIFTED, hence tend to be troublesome, and more extreme, HARDER TO REACH – WE ALL FOCUS ON OUR OWN LEVEL. It is different to illustrate how it feels for something you used to love to become hateful, nasty, sickening almost instantaneously, but many folks I have taught say it HIT them the same way some new crush, victim or fetish et al, you became obsessed with in a moment, CAN SUDDENTLY APPEAR TOTALLY DIFFERENT WHEN THE FANTASY YOU ARE PROJECTING ON THEM EVAPORATES, USUALLY VIA THEIR FAILURE TO LIVE UP TO IT IN SOME WAY. That’s a nice intro to it, so fine, just know what I am describing here is not just the LOSS OF ATTRACTION, IT IS TO BECOME TOTALLY AVERSE TO IT, TO LITERALLY ‘DESPISE IT’ AS A NEW FEELING, because it makes you FEEL SICK via WEAKNESS, LITERALLY…
This is why I teach your BETTER THAN, guide you to the feeling of SPIRITUAL HEDONISM early, as ‘replacement therapy’ and a massive SPEED UP, as otherwise the void in your life created by this sudden LOSS can ‘depress’ folks into STOPPING simply out of ‘a habit they miss’. Sadly a very small number will be so scared by this they will START TO BLANK OUT THEIR BASIC IN ORDER TO KEEP DOING IT, which is one of the key gateways into DOUBLE CRYSTALLIZATION, where you become 2 people who don’t talk to each other, AND NEEDS SPECIAL METHODS TO FIX. In rare cases a Highly Gifted hedonist can also go through this process BY ACCIDENT, after an intense shock associated with their Hedonism, and AUTOMATICALLY BLANK OUT THEIR BASIC FROM THEN ON, even claiming to others not to do it anymore, which is a really good reason to TAKE YOUR DEVELOPMENT VERY SERIOUSLY NOW, as this is very, VERY DANGEROUS – YOU BECOME VERY VULNERABLE TO ANIMAL PARASITES, LIKE A PUPPET. Often this type of extreme needs to ‘feed their demon’ whilst they develop, so are special cases that cannot be easily generalized for this post, BUT WILL STILL BENEFIT FROM FOLLOWING THIS METHOD as it will show them what is actually happening.
And Yes, you guessed it, there is a further reason I am going on with this topic AS AN ILLUSTRATION OF SOMETHING ELSE, long after the point has been made – YOU MUST LEARN HOW TO ‘SEE’ HOW YOUR BASIC FIGHTS BACK VIA USING ITS ‘EXTREMES’, ‘FAST’. So take for example THE MASSIVE GROWTH IN A PREVIOUSLY RARE ISSUE THAT BARELY EXISTED 10 YEARS AGO = THE INTENSE EMBARRASSMENT OF YOUR BASIC CAUSED BY THE THREAT OF SOCIAL MEDIA. This can be so bad that many Gifted folks decide it is literally better to DESTROY YOURSELF THAN FACE IT, BECAUSE BOTH THE PAIN OF FACING IT AND THE THREAT TO THEM PUBLICALLY MEANS IT IS BETTER TO BURN, as a sort of lesser of the two evils. These folks often DOUBLE DOWN ON THEIR BASIC, becoming much worse as a reaction to this FEAR, FOR WHICH THERE IS NO EASY FIX – THE SHAME OF BOTH YOUR EMBARRASSMENT AND YOUR CONSCIENCE COMBINE SO YOU ‘CAN NEVER GO THERE’, the anticipation of that pain is at a physical level of HEARTBREAK.
BUT WHEN YOU UNDERSTAND THAT YOUR FAKE BASIC COMES FROM YOUR FAKE MOODS THEN IT IS ACTUALLY QUITE EASY TO BREAK:
THE EASIEST WAY TO FIGHT YOUR BASIC IS BY SEEING THROUGH IT, THE FAKE CON OF IT, SO YOUR GIFTED MOOD STATE, YOUR BETTER THAN, MUST BECOME BIGGER, STRONGER, MORE PERSISTENT THAN YOUR LOW ANIMAL MOOD STATE, YOUR ‘WORSE THAN’.
THIS WILL DECREASE YOUR ANTICIPATION OF YOUR BASIC VERY QUICKLY, AND WITHOUT THAT YOUR BASIC WILL STOP BEING FUN AND START BEING SICKENING – YOU WILL SEE THROUGH IT, YOU WILL ‘FEEL’ THAT ‘WRONGNESS’, THAT IT IS A SELF-DESTRUCTIVE ‘LIE’, A CON.
AFTER YOU MASTER THIS CYCLE OF REAL GIFTED VS FALSE ANIMAL MOODS, YOU WILL REALIZE THAT THIS CYCLE ALLOWS YOU TO SEE FAKE YOU ‘IN ACTION’ ACROSS A RANGE OF ITS ACTIVITIES, WHILST ALLOWING YOU TO CHOOSE WHAT YOU ACTUALLY WANT TO DO = SELF-POSSESSED.
YES, YOU MUST USE THE NEW GIFTED BASELINE MOOD YOU DEVELOP TODAY TO OPPOSE YOUR FAKE ANIMAL MOODS, IN ORDER TO CYCLE ROUND A REPETATIVE PROCESS THAT CONTINUALLY BUILDS YOUR GIFT, YOUR ‘BETTER THAN’, WHILE IT WEAKENS YOUR ‘ANIMAL’.
SO, here are three keys, simply put, that are worth knowing as they will help with your MOOD-BASED CONFUSION – THE START OF MAKING YOU SMARTER ABOUT YOUR BASIC BY YOU MAKING SMARTER ABOUT YOUR MOOD, the start of understanding what is happening to you during this silly little conjob.
First, this is a very good example of a visible version of the same issue that recurs over and over again in Spirituality, to deal with BIG things in your life you NEED TO BECOME BIGGER THAN THEM, in our case today BIGGER THAN FAKE YOU, CONSCIOUSLY BIGGER, SO YOU CAN START TO SEE BEHIND THE MIRROR, TO FEEL ‘THE TAILS’ OF YOUR HIDDEN EMOTION OF FEAR, EMBARRISMENT THAT IS THE REAL CAUSE OF YOUR BASIC BEHAVIOURS, JUST AS IT DISAPPEARS. Animal anticipation is USED TO HIDE THE TRUTH FROM YOU, so its a really good idea to see that it does not actually exist – LIKE ALL ‘MEMORIES’ OF FEAR OR DESIRE IT DOES NOT RELATE TO ‘NOW’.
Second it is also an example of one of the ODDEST THINGS IN ALL SPIRITUALITY, when your GIFT ACCEPTS YOUR BAD, either via some Ancestral cause, OR IN ORDER TO PROTECT YOU FROM FAKE YOU MENTALLY, by making you tougher, ABLE TO COPE WITH THINGS THAT WOULD BREAK MOST PEOPLE. You see this with folks whose level of basic is in some way forced on them ‘situationally’ so it is not a choice, like mine was, and so their Gift stops attacking them via their Conscience early on and makes them STRONGER, CASUAL. As a teacher you often hear these people say all their BASIC is ‘No Big Deal’ as they don’t take it ‘seriously’, because they are strong enough to normalize it and make it a JOKE, at least for now, as it is an END STAGE state of mind, your Real You is almost gone and most likely you will already experience uncontrolled states of mind, of MANIA – NEXT STOP intermittent ‘CATATONIA’, which IS a big deal.
But the Third one is the KILLER, and one that several of you I know should take some time to consider – AS I HAVE SAID YOUR FAKE BASIC IS A PERVERSION OF YOUR GIFT, EG IT USES THE SAME SUPERNATURAL MECHANSIM OF YOUR GIFT IN A ‘WRONG WAY’ SO ‘YOU’ LOSE THE BENEFIT OF IT, AS YOU DECLINE. Often this perversion of your TRUE character is the exact opposite of what GIFTED you ‘is’, so you become the anti-you, like one of those odd growths on a cultured Rose that looks all weird, spiky, and very different to the REAL rose – a ‘SUCKLER’ – THAT IS STILL TOTALLY DEPENDENT ON IT, YET IS HAPPY TO DESTROY THE BLOOM OF THAT ROSE SO IT CAN GROW. These people become TOXIC, the new age word is ‘Energy Vampires’, and not just to themselves but to everything around them, a sort of cancer, stealing energy from everything else to feed the rapid growth OF THIER EMBARRASSMENT.
YES, what fuels that growth in GIFTED cases is EXTREME levels of embarrassment, WHICH BECOME DIRECTLY LOCKED TOGETHER WITH YOUR BASIC IN A CYCLE, as the embarrassment itself is an even lower level of consciousness than your basic, working like a rachet to CONTINUALLY DRAG YOU BACK DOWN, whatever else you do. So it has to go, and you need to break it fast, BURN IT OUT AT ‘THE SOURCE’ BY ‘FACING’ IT. The good news is THAT EMBARRASSMENT IS PART OF BEING A CHILD, of refusing to grow up, SO IT’S AN ILLUSION. See, that extreme embarrassment, that inability to even ‘look at yourself’ anymore IS ALREADY IN THE PAST, Real You only does this ‘once’, BUT FAKE YOU THEN REPLAYS THAT STATE OVER AND OVER AS A MEMORY TO CONTROL YOU.
If you had ever met me you would know that in these sitreps I GO OUT OF MY WAY TO SHAME YOU FAST, QUICK AND CLEAN, JUST TO GET IT OUT OF THE WAY and MOVE ON, to try and grow you up fast, AS I KNOW WHAT IS GOING TO HAPPEN. See, your ongoing embarrassment NO LONGER EXISTS, YOU HAVE ALREADY DONE IT, EVERYONE KNOWS – WHAT YOU ARE FEELING IS JUST THE MEMORY OF THAT FEELING FROM FAKE YOU, BECAUSE IT IS FAKE. So don’t underestimate this issue, it leads to its even more childish cousins, ‘narcissistic blaming’ and ‘destructive jealousy’, all of which you JUSTIFY AS ‘NOT MY FAULT’, before the inevitable ‘intervention’. But again, this knowledge will tend to make you double down against any HELP, to scream like a baby, as you won’t be able to face your embarrassment until you are BIGGER THAN IT, which is what I’m going to teach you today.
Now, for the more extreme amongst you, FOR THE MID TO HIGHLY GIFTED WHO LOST THEIR WAY EARLY ON, SAY IN THEIR LATE TEENS, its important to try and UNDERSTAND YOUR EMBARRASSMENT, your inability to change because of it. Many people’s entire FAKE YOU is built on top of embarrassment at a high level, and these days it often involves Sex, particularly when Fake You takes over your natural, your Gifted level of ‘high libido’ and controls you through ‘Fake Sex’, which is the creation of an unreal type of Eroticism to bleed you as the key part of your Incontinence. See Fake You gets you to CHASE Sex where no natural, MUTUAL attraction BETWEEN PEOPLE exists just to BLEED YOU, with the 3 most common types of Fake Sex being the classic Fantasy Sex (eg all things porn), Fetishized Sex (eg all things designed to increase animal tension) and, by far the worst loss, Manufactured Sex (eg to feel erotic simply because others find you attractive). Yes, your Fake You will ‘invent Sex’ in your mind and then body in order to control you, and combined with high levels of embarrassment is probably the greatest single trap in all spirituality, AS IT CAN NEVER BE FACED HEAD ON, IT MUST BE APPROACH FROM THE SIDE, like we are doing today. Real sex, beneficial sex involves actual people you have a POSITIVE connection to, SO IT BUILDS YOU UP and UP, while all Fake Sex is a form of CHASING DEATH, as the loss of your gift is what death is – THAT IS THE POINT OF FAKE SEX.
Now this is going to get a bit ‘Icky’ but I want YOU TO see it NOW for later, please – all forms of Basic Incontinence are a form of SELF HARM IN A VERY REAL SENSE, but you can’t relate to that because your FAKE YOU IS USING A ‘GLAMOUR’, a witches trick, a glamourous Con to hide that from you in the moment. What you are doing is exactly the same as a child does when they realize they can use visceral sensation to blot out anxiety and unhappiness from their mind by SLASHING THEMSELVES WITH A RAZOR. There is no benefit to this, it is a FAKE feeling better when you feel FAKE worse, AS IT BLEEDS YOU IN AN ACTUAL SENSE OF THAT WORD, just like you are doing to yourself. This is particularly true WITH HIGH LEVELS OF EMBARRISSMENT that drives you to use DRUGS, SEX OR VIOLENCE as your chosen forms of Basic Incontinence, as these all BLEED YOUR GIFT directly. It is not cool, not exciting, not clever, not even interesting, its just sad on a whole other level of pathetic, IT IS ‘SADASS’ – YOU ARE BEING CONNED INTO SELF HARM FOR NO BENEFIT TO YOURSELF YOU DON’T ALREADY HAVE, YOU ARE A DORK LIVING IN A FANTASY WORLD.
You will also find that your little herd, your parasites KNOW THIS, and artificially create more of this FAKE anxiety in your life in order to control you, GET YOU TO DO IT MORE, so never feel sorry for them – THEY THINK YOU ARE A ‘WIND UP TOY’, A MORON. I have to half kill several of this type in my life as favours to other gifted and you never get tired of it, as you are doing a service to mankind in general – YOUR PARASITES ALWAYS BECOME INTOXICATED WITH HURTING YOU. Be mindful, however much ‘fun’ from the attention you are having, this type of parasite covers some of the real horror shows, the desperate addicts who need drugs just to open the fridge let alone go to work, the ones who prey on the junior staff who work for them, and tend to rack up a lot of suicides with the folk they ‘used to be in relationships’ with, WHILST ALSO TENDING TO SMELL LIKE THE ARSE OF A HORSE THAN BEEN DEAD FOR 10 DAYS – REMOVE THEM FROM YOUR LIFE BY FORCE IF REQUIRED, THEY ARE DISGUSTING PEOPLE. So SEE IT clear, YOU ARE STORE UP A LOT OF SHIT FOR YOURSELF FOR NO REASON WHATSOEVER – your FAKE anxiety is used to build your FAKE anticipation of the FAKE BASIC activities that just lessen that FAKE anxiety – YOU ARE WEARING TIGHT SHOES FOR THE RELIEF OF TAKING THEM OFF, AND IT’S ALL COMPLETELY FAKE, there is no pleasure in it, NO SEX, AT ALL.
Not going to go on about Sex today however, BUT IF YOU SUFFER WITH ANY FORM OF EMBARRISSMENT THAT IS TO BIG FOR YOU TO FACE, you must START TO STEP AWAY FROM IT IN YOUR MIND, so you can see it as part of Animal Fake You, SEE WHAT IT IS – A CON JOB. See, the reason for this last bit of expose of your BASIC is that EMBARRASSMENT AT HIGH LEVELS IS EXTREMELY USEFUL AS A TEACHING AID, not only to make the point about the size of some Fake You moods being too big for you to face RELATABLE, but also as a way for a teacher to judge YOUR POTENTIAL TO DEVELOP. See, IF YOU ARE ABLE TO ‘CONFESS’ YOUR EMBARRASSMENT TO YOUR TEACHER ‘IN PRIVATE’, to ‘exorcize’ it in secret, it means that YOU HAVE THE POTENTIAL TO GET BIG ENOUGH TO FACE IT, that is why the Catholic Church still uses CONFESSION, cause it WORKS. It is not a particularly fun thing for any teacher, however it is accepted as part of the job, and always well received as part of your own Heros Journey, much as we usually already know the type of fear you are going to say. Trust me, if you ever get anywhere on your journey THEN YOU WILL SIEZE EVERY OPP TO CONFESS THINGS YOU NO LONGER WANT TO A TRUSTED TEACHER TO GET SHOT OF THEM…
BUT I KNOW, right now you can’t do it, can you – EVEN IF I TELL YOU I KNOW YOU WILL STILL BE FORCED TO DENY IT VIA YOUR PRECIOUS LITTLE EGO SAFTEY… Modern folks find no comfort in knowing from their teacher that ‘we have all done it’, indeed many of us were worse than YOU, and that no one of us judges you AFTER YOU START TO DEVELOP – its just become TOO BIG to even think about, BECAUSE YOU ARE STUCK IN A LOW LEVEL ANIMAL MOOD WHICH CREATES ‘ARTIFICIAL SENSITIVITIES’ TO THOSE LITTLE MOOD SWINGS THAT CONTROL YOU, TOTALLY. Its a TRAP, you bounce off the mental walls of your mood continually turning around and around in ever-decreasing circles in your head, when all you really need to do is BREAK THE MOOD IN YOU ARE LIVING IN.
Yes, as I’ve already said this information won’t be enough, BUT IT WILL BE ENOUGH FOR REAL YOU TO MAKE YOUR BASIC START TO STING, so you will now start to see Fake You in your basic, START TO SEE WHAT A GUTLESS TOOL YOU ARE, AND THE WHOLE ‘COOL’ THING WILL START TO DISAPPEAR, start to leave a shitty taste in your mouth. Yes, MY apologies, I’ve just cursed you, but hey, this is Radical Change, did you really expect it to be fucking Sunday School..? It half killed me 25 years ago because I fought it, but then I was probably much worse than you, probably, and you know better than to fight this now, DON’T YOU? Yes, SEE THESE IMPOSSIBLE PROBLEMS YOU HAVE are all just your FAKE BASIC, fucking with you, and are, WITH THE PROCESS BELOW, QUITE EASY TO BEAT. I did not know that 25 years ago, that all these separate elements could be combined to JUMP START CHANGE, so I had to do this the HARD WAY, but you won’t, because you know there is a short cut, MUCH AS SADLY KNOWING THIS WON’T BE ENOUGH, BUT YOU WILL BE READY WHEN IT HAPPENS…
How does it start to STING you ask? When you start to see the pattern of YOUR BASIC INCONTINENCE HURTING YOU, first directly after it and later at the time. See when indulged a lot this pattern of BASIC will grow outside of your chosen form of BASIC and start to affect EVERYTHING IN YOUR LIFE – YOU WILL START TO LEAK ALL THE TIME, particularly if your GIFT is still strong or directly after activities that give you a GIFTED boost. Indeed this PATTERN CAN ACTUALLY MAKE YOU INCONTINENT, and you will need to go to the bathroom many more times than you actually need to as the ‘fake urge’ to urinate starts to play with you. Worse in time your other most effective forms of energy loss, TALKING, DIGESTION and FANTAZING will take on a far greater importance TO YOU, WITH MANY HIGHLY GIFTED LIVES CONSISTING OF LITTLE MORE THAN THESE THINGS. This is when GIFTED become what we call ‘JUMPY’, because they are unconsciously always looking to burn their spirit via this type of activity, with this phase being a particular precursor to the Hardness phase, where GIFTED BECOME VERY CALLOUS, BRUTAL, UNPLEASANT AND DISINTERESTED AS PEOPLE, and only care if they ‘had fun’, if they ‘got theirs’.
Frankly, it is always VERY OBVIOUS WHEN THIS PATTERN STARTS TO DOMINATE SOMEONE, and makes us smile, but not in a negative WAY, but in a way that CAN BE USED TO TEACH YOU. See, everyone wants to STOP THESE OTHER BEHAVIOURS, they are of no use, AND FRANKLY ARE EMBARRISSING WHEN POINTED OUT. So we can show you this same pattern in things you don’t like about yourself, your tendency to feel compelled TO LEAK in things you want to stop, so IT WORKS LIKE A DOOR INTO THE CONCEPT OF INCONTINENCE, whereas your chosen Basic is usually too bigger deal for your to go near, AS YOU STILL GET SOMETHING OUT OF IT TO THE POINT THAT THE REST OF YOUR LIFE IS VANILLA WITHOUT IT – THIS IS THE KEY WAY IT CONTROLS YOU, via the anticipation of crappy little thrills BY BECOMING WAY MORE VALUABLE TO YOU, TO YOUR LIFESTYLE VIEW, THAN they ACTUALLY ARE, BECAUSE THE REST OF YOUR LIFE IS SO FUCKING CRAP.
Yes, it is always easier for you to ACCEPT YOU ARE MAKING A TOTAL TWAT OF YOURSELF BY OVER TALKING, OVER EATING, DAYDREAMING LIKE WALTER MITTY, than it is to deal with the SHIT THAT YOU THINK IS FUN, so that is what we do. We GET YOU TO WORK ON THIS PATTERN IN MUCH EASIER, SMALLER WAYS THAT YOU CAN BE SHOWN VERY NEGATIVELY TO YOU, indeed, it will help make you SMARTER BY STARTING TO SEE THE POWER OF NEGATIVE INCONTINENT PATTERNS IN YOUR LIFE, particularly when they start to GROUP TOGETHER, when the worst of your BASIC ACTS are actually a cluster of INCONTINENT BEHAVIORS. See, we get YOU TO SEE THE MULTIPLE DIFFERENT TYPES OF LEAKS AT THE SAME TIME AS A STATE OF INCONTINENCE, like ingesting multiple different TYPES OF ACID (smoking/drinking/drugs), at the same time of experiencing multiple types of FEARS (social anxieties, discomfort, pain), at the same time as doing multiple NEGATIVE BASIC THINGS (over talking, over-eating, bizarre fantasizing, pointless fake thrill sex), at the same time as losing CONTROL OF BODILY FUNCTIONS (fake hunger/thirst, weak bladder, bizarre emotional sensitivities, phantom irritations, nervous physical ticks etc). Be clear – all of this is designed to make you FAKE FEEL BETTER, so you do it all willingly, without question, BUT YOU DON’T BELEIVE IT, DO YOU, YOU THINK THESE ARE ALL REAL CHOICES YOU ARE MAKING…
So do yourself a big favour now – NEVER UNDERESTIMATE HOW MUCH OF A SIMPLE LITTLE HERD ANIMAL YOU ARE, AT YOUR LEVEL OF CONSCIOUSNESS. Never forget how FUCKING STUPID AND EASILY LED AROUND BY THE FAKE B/S OF FAKE YOU, how much your precious ‘SOPHISTICATION’, your DEPTH, your CLASS, that you attribute to yourself is a VERY THIN VENEER INDEED, AS IT IS ALL TOTAL B/S. You are a HERD animal, you select your friends on the basis of SOME BENEFIT TO YOU, to them agreeing to dislike the same people or things as you, TO HAVE A LITTLE GANG OF FREAKS, EVEN IF YOU DESPISE THEM AS PEOPLE, THAT VALUE OF EGO SAFETY IS WORTH FAR MORE TO AN ANIMAL THEN THEIR OWN OPINION. You give up 4/5 of yourself every fucking day in order to both BE LIKE/FIT IN AND BE LIKED BY OTHER PEOPLE, because of your INFERIORITY COMPLEX, your undermining character SO YOUR PRECIOUS INDIVIDUALITY DOES NOT EXIST ANYMORE – YOU HAVE NO OPINION OF YOUR OWN, your life is one little quest for EXTERNAL VALIDATION, like a toxic little party girl DESPERATE FOR ‘LIKES’, AS THAT IS THE ONLY WAY HERD ANIMALS SURVIVE.
But you are GIFTED, ARE YOU NOT, SO WHY DO YOU NEED ‘THE HERD’? You don’t, YOU HAVE BEEN TAUGHT THIS, to BE THIS AS A CHILD, AND THE ONLY WAY OUT OF THIS CRAPPY LITTLE EXISTENCE IS TO GROW THE FUCK UP! You must GET SMARTER to be able to see this happening AT THE TIME, AND THE ONLY WAY TO DO THAT IS HAVE THE BOTTLE TO RESIST THE AUTOMATIC ACTION OF IT, TO STOP AND THINK WHAT THE FUCK AM I DOING THIS SHIT FOR AGAIN? It takes BOTTLE TO GO AGAINST YOURSELF, TO OPPOSE THE STUPIDITY OF LEAKING, TO KNOW WHY YOU ARE DOING IT, DECIDE DIFFERENTLY AND STOP DOING IT, otherwise even if you know its stupid THERE IS NOTHING IN YOU, NO BIG ENOUGH SHELL OF RESISTANCE TO STOP YOU, you just go on and on with it, forever THINKING IS FUN TO TOTALLY HUMILIATE YOURSELF LIKE A TWAT…
S0 NOW, here is a BIG POINT to telling you ALL THIS ABOUT YOUR BASIC at THE FIRST LAYER OF TRUTH – TODAY IT IS A VERY GOOD IDEA TO GET TO KNOW THE ‘BIG PICTURE’ OF CHANGE, SO YOU CAN SEE WHAT IS HAPPENING AT THE TIME, FAST. So I must make you SMARTER, as I have said, BY EXPLAINING THE REASONS ‘BEHIND’ THESE FACTS AS PATTERNS, with this example being based on your BASIC ‘INCONTINENCE’, the biggest waste of your gift AS IT RELATES TO this LESSON. See if I give you these NEW FACTS AS PATTERNS THEN YOU CAN USE THEM TO RELATE TO OTHER SIMILAR THINGS, rather than try and remember things as INFORMATION, WHICH YOUR FAKE YOU CAN CRUSH. This way you can SEE things happening to you, AND understand the REASONS for what is happening to you MUCH, MUCH QUICKER, SO YOU WILL GET SMARTER. So today you have JUST got A LOT SMARTER ABOUT YOUR BASIC…
But THE SECOND LAYER OF TRUTH is EVEN MORE IMPORTANT – THOSE PATTERNS UNDERPIN A WIDE RANGE OF UNDERSTANDING WAY BEYOND UNDERSTANDING YOUR BASIC, indeed, as I have said, the whole issue of YOUR CONSCIOUS SIZE IS A MASSIVE, RECURRING THEME IN ALL SPIRITUALITY BECAUSE IT IS A MASTER PATTERN, eg when BAD aspects of you character, like embarrassment CONTROLLING YOU, are SO BIG YOU CAN’T SEE THEM INTELLECTUALLY AT ALL unless I force you to LOOK UP, like standing next to the foot of a skyscraper. YES, by learning an example, very relevant to this lesson, you are also able to learn other things much faster later, BECAUSE YOU HAVE A PATTERN THAT YOU CAN RELATE TO ‘NOW’, SO THAT PATTERN WILL BE BURNT IN, and you can use it on other stuff later. There are volumes of both ancient and modern spirituality where THE ENTIRE PURPOSE OF THE TEXT IS TO ACHIEVE THIS NEW PATTERN ‘BURN IN’ SIMPLY TO MAKE YOU SMARTER, eg it is the core of the Christian New Testament.
So the MAIN reason I have chosen to illustrate your Fake Self via this expose of your Fake Basic is to INTRODUCE THE CONCEPT OF MASTER PATTERNS in relation to PART 4 ON CHANGE, ON DIGNITY ITSELF, before I give you x3 more important and VERY SPECIFIC big-picture elements as new Master Patterns that are WAY MORE IMPORTANT TO THE NEXT LESSON – YOUR ‘REAL PERSONALITY’, REALITY AS A ‘PERSONAL HALLUCINATION’ and THE ‘MULTI-DIMENSIONAL’ NATURE OF REALITY. Yes, You ‘Seeing’ these elements is in the future of even rapid development, but knowing them theoretically in relation to your Fake Self is VERY USEFUL now AS PATTERNS, as it provides both a TRUE DIRECTION TO YOUR PRACTISE and actually HELPS YOU START THE METHOD TODAY WITH A BROADER MINDSET OF WHAT IS RIGHT FOR YOU. These elements will help you GET THE POINT SO YOU CAN USE IT ON OTHER ELEMENTS OF THIS PROCESS, indeed they show you that your life is not random chance at all, BECAUSE YOU HAVE A POINT, A ‘HEROES JOURNEY’, YOU WERE BORN WITH ONE – IT IS PART OF THE REASON YOU WERE BORN at all.
I am not going to do this yet, as you must relate to these patterns in NEXT METHOD YOURSELF, you must RELATE to them over time and so burn them in, AS ONLY YOU CAN DO THAT. However I can point you in the right direction by saying that YOUR REAL PERSONALITY IS THE GOAL OF TODAYS PRACTICE as an end result, MULTI-DIMENSOINAL REALITY IS THE REASON THE PRACTICE WORKS the odd way it does, and the PERSONAL HALLUCINATION OF YOUR WORLD IS HOW YOU UNDERSTAND THE METHOD ITSELF, at the start, so you can get started much quicker than just following the method. All of this will allow you to get much better, much quicker at using the METHOD TO SUIT YOUR PARTICULAR GIFT, TO SEE IT WORK OR NOT WORK VIA YOUR EXPERIMENTS WITH IT, and then chase the bits which work better for you because you can relate to those bits via these master patterns – THIS IS WHAT ‘DIRECTION’ MEANS, and you can use that direction to personalize your practice with that direction in mind, like driving around a roadblock en route to the same destination.
So I’ll leave you with this summary of this intro section, nice and breezy…
YOU MUST GET SMARTER TODAY BECAUSE YOU ARE DUMB AS FUCK – YOU ARE TOO SLOW.
YET YOU THINK YOU ARE CLEVER, SO KNOW I CAN’T GET YOU ANY FURTHER UNLESS YOU START TO MAKE A POINT OF GETTING SMARTER, BIGGER – YOUR GUTLESS STUPIDITY INSULTS US ALL, YOUR PETTY MOOD SWINGS DEFINE YOU YET THIS IS NOT A HOBBY, IT IS A WAY OF LIFE.
SO KNOW – I’M A TEACHER, AND I HELP ‘BAD’ PEOPLE LIKE YOU IN ORDER TO HELP MYSELF TOO. I NEVER WANTED IT, BUT I WELCOME IT NOW – NO ONES ‘FAKE YOU’ EVER WANTS TO BE WHAT THEY ‘ARE’, AND IN ALL TRUTH IT WAS ‘THE CURE’ FOR THE VICIOUS, ANIMAL TWAT I HAD BECOME.
BUT ENOUGH ABOUT ME – WHAT IS ‘YOUR POINT’?
YEP, GIFTED HAVE A POINT IN THE SENSE OF A VOCATION, A STYLE, A ‘BIG PICTURE’ THAT OFTEN CONTAINS MANY EVENTS, WHILST BEING NO ONE EVENT, SO YOU MUST FIND THIS, I DON’T TELL YOU, MUCH AS IT SHOULD BE OBVIOUS, BUT DON’T GET LOST IN THE OBVIOUS ONES EITHER…
WANT A CLUE? – YOUR POINT IS HIDDEN IN WHAT YOU ‘CHASE’, BEHIND YOUR ‘STOCKHOLM SYNDROME’, WITHIN YOUR ‘HEARTS DESIRE’ AND, MOST IMPORTANTLY, WHAT YOUR FAKE YOU WILL MOVE HEAVEN AND EARTH TO STOP YOU DOING, BECAUSE YOU ARE SCARED SHITLESS…
AHHH, YOU DON’T HAVE A POINT, YOU HAVE THE POINT OF ‘NO POINT’, WHICH IS TO GET TO YOUR DEATH AS QUICKLY, PAINLESSLY AND PRODUCTIVELY AS POSSIBLE? SO YOUR TIME HAS PASSED – CONTROL, CHEAP THRILLS AND EGO SAFETY IS ALL THAT MATTERS NOW? YOU ARE A CHILD?
I’M SURPRISED TO HEAR THAT, SEE WORD ON THE STREET IS THAT YOU ‘USED TO BE’ SOMETHING SPECIAL, BEEYATCH – YOUR NATURAL CLASS USED TO DRIP FROM YOUR FINGERS LIKE LIQUID GOLD, YOUR PRESENCE COULD FRY LIGHT BULGS, YOUR EMOTIONS DISTORTED ANIMAL REALITY.
SO WHERE DID ALL THAT ‘MAGIC OF YOU’ GO THEN?
JESUS… YOU DIDN’T LET SOME CREEPY LITTLE FREAKS STEAL IT FROM YOU? SO SORRY TO HEAR THAT BABE, YOU MUST BE SICK TO YOUR STOMACH, GUTTED FOR YOU, BUT TRY AND BE STRONG, REMEMBER THERE IS ALWAYS YOUR PICTURES AND THE FUNNY FAGS WHEN IT STARTS TO GET HARD…
BUT I HAVE TO SAY, THAT JUST SOUNDS LIKE MORE LOW-QUALITY BULLSHIT TO ME, LIKE – IT SOUNDS LIKE WHAT WE ALL FUCKING SAY AT THE BEGINNING, BEFORE WE ‘GROW UP’, AND ‘FACE IT’, WHILE WE STILL HAVE THE BOTTLE TO PUT OURSELVES IN HARMS WAY WITH A SMILE.
SEE I LOVE GIFTED HEDONISTS ME, THE ‘SELF-LOVE’ IN THEM, DON’T CARE HOW THEY ‘ACT IT OUT’ NOW, CAUSE THAT SELF-LOVE IS THEIR SPIRIT, THEIR ‘REAL YOU’ KEEPING THEM ALIVE, BUT MOST IMPORTANTLY THAT IS WHERE THEIR ‘BOTTLE’, THEIR ‘FUCK YOU’ COMES FROM.
YES, YOU ARE GIFTED, SO ‘YOU MIGHT AS WELL FACE IT’ – ITS ONLY OVER WHEN YOU’RE DEAD.
SO TRY NOT TO DIE BEFORE THEN, TRY NOT TO KILL ‘YOUR SPIRIT’ BY FITTING IN WITH ‘THEM’, AS IT’S ALL ‘YOU HAVE’, BUT ALL ‘THEY WANT’, SO FIND YOUR OWN LEVEL, FITTING IN ‘BENEATH YOU’ WILL MAKE THEM HATE YOU, AS YOU MAKE THEM FEEL UNBEARABLY INFERIOR, SO THEY HURT YOU…
YES, TRY AND REMEMBER THIS AS YOU AGE, WHATEVER YOU DECIDE TO DO, AS NATURE SLOWLY TAKES EVERYTHING BACK IT HAS EVER GIVEN YOU – ONCE YOUR BOTTLE HAS GONE, YOUR SPIRIT HAS GONE, AND THEN YOU ARE JUST ANOTHER ANIMAL WHO HATES THEIR LIFE.
NO? YOU STILL HAVE THE BOTTLE FOR THIS? THINK YOU ARE ‘STILL’ A GANGSTA CHICK, NOT ‘BROKEN IN’ YET, EH?
OK – SHOW ME – SHOW ME YOU STILL HAVE SOME BOTTLE – ITS A TEST BITCH – SHOW ME YOUR ‘SPIRIT’ OR WHAT IS LEFT OF IT,
SEE AT THE START THE STRENGTH OF THAT SPIRIT IS REALLY ALL THAT MATTERS, I CAN FIX (ALMOST) EVERYTHING ELSE…
YES, EVERYTHING IS A TEST, IF YOU ARE GIFTED – SO WHAT’S LEFT IN THE TANK BABE – ARE YOU ‘CREEPY’ OR CLASSY, ‘ADDICT’ OR PLAYER, BADASS OR ‘SADASS’? DO YOU STILL ‘RATE A MENTION’, ARE YOU STILL ‘REMARKABLE’? DO YOU STILL SINGE THE FUCKING GROUND AS YOU WALK ALONG?
SEE, AND DON’T TAKE THIS PERSONALLY, BUT RIGHT NOW PRETTY MUCH ANY-BLOODY-THING WOULD BE BETTER THAN THE RATHER OBVIOUS LITTLE OBESSIONAL FREAK SHOW YOU ARE ROLLING, SO MAYBE JUST KICK IT UP A NOTCH EH, BEFORE YOU BORE US ALL TO DEATH – LET ME SEE WHAT YOUR ‘BEST DAY’ LOOKS LIKE. You DO still have a BEST DAY right? YOU STILL HAVE SOME ‘GAME’, some ‘MOJO’… don’t you? Ohhh, You are NOT CONFLICTED, ARE YOU? NOT LOST IN THE CONFUSION OF YET ANOTHER DESPERATELY NON-URGENT yet strangely compelling LITTLE animal MOOD SWING, driven by what they might say about you on your SOCIALS? ‘THE HORROR’, eh, and you had worked so hard to keep it all together, to KEEP ‘THEM ALL’ SO FUCKING HAPPY…
Thought so… but don’t worry honey, its cool really, you have all these ‘impossible problems’ you have invented, so just ‘sit tight’, wait for the wheel to turn and let ‘evolution’ do its work, wait for it to cleanse the earth of all your chubby little parasites by random chance, THEN YOU WON’T HAVE TO ‘SIDE WITH THOSE WHO YOU DESPISE’ (Sorry, Leonard…). Then you will see that your problems amount to little more than being bullied out of you lunchbox by a skinny middle class 8 y/o with severe emotional issues, while the teachers look on in some primary school playground, and your ‘Little Shop of Horrors’ was SIMPLY ONE MORE TEST YOU FAILED – you will see why the Teachers don’t give a shit about ‘poor you’ because you FAILED ‘NATURAL SELECTION 101’. If it makes you feel any better know that we ‘pity’ you, we sympathize, we even emphasize, and comfort ourselves in the knowledge that you are warm, well fed, safe and comfortably numb, and pray for you in the hope that there is someone there at the end to make up some nice shit about your little gutless life to go on your headstone, just before we FORGET YOU FOREVER.
You do want to ‘be forgotten’ now, don’t you, ITS YOUR CHOICE TO DISAPPEAR, TO TRADE ‘YOUR HOT ASHES FOR TREES’ (Sorry, Pink Floyd…) you don’t want anyone to know about your ‘nasty’, so you want to hide EVERYTHING ABOUT YOURSELF NOW, LIKE A PUSSY – YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT THAT MEANS FOR YOUR LIFE, you understand how ‘attention’ works now? For your own sake, I hope so… For the rest of you, for all those who still take some PRIDE in their ‘GAME’, let’s go LOOKING FOR THE SHIT shall we, while we can still put up a fight worth watching, BECAUSE WE OUR ‘BOX OFFICE’, AND WE LOVE IT. See we know our death is already sitting quietly in the corner, ‘judging us’ with a grin, JUST LIKE YOURS IS – SO REPEAT AFTER ME, NOT TODAY OLD MAN, take your Chess Board, your sackcloth and ashes, and your pox riddled pale horse and do one my friend, until tomorrow comes.
See tomorrow we, and maybe even you, will have a way better story to tell his master, THAT WE JUST NAILED, at the very ‘top of our game’, WHILST KEEPING OUR OWN, AND EVERYONES ELSES SECRETS locked away, so very safe from his gossipy little ‘animals’ AS WE TAKE THEM TO THE GRAVE. See that is NOT You is it, that pathetic creature desperately searching for any titbit about something ‘special’ they can use on Whatsapp to briefly raise their rank of Significance from ‘Harmless’ to ‘Mostly Harmless’, before falling back into wondering why their life appears to have gone to total shit – YOU DON’T NEED TO DO THAT, DO YOU, but THEY DO. Now why is that, do ya think – WHAT MAKES YOU CRINGE WITH SHAME AND HUMILIATION IN THE COLD LIGHT OF DAY WHEN YOU KNOW NO ONE WILL EVER KNOW WHAT YOU HAVE DONE, WHILST THEY GIGGLE LIKE A CHILD BECAUSE THEY PROBABLY GOT AWAY WITH IT, AND DON’T CARE EVEN WHEN THEY HAVEN’T BECAUSE ‘ANYTHING’ IS BETTER THAN THEIR ‘NOTHING’.
SEE IT YET, or do you need another 1000 words? I know, SHAME TESTS ARE A BASTARD, but sadly nothing else comes close at an animal level in showing ‘you’ who ‘you really are’, SO STOP HIDING FROM IT – SEVERAL OF YOU HAVE ‘PASSED’.
Now, however much you may wish to see the above as another one of my many rants, even though I nailed it, know that it is not, IT IS THE KEY TO THIS WHOLE LESSON, FOR ‘YOU’ TO OPEN YOUR MIND AND SEE ALL OF THIS FOR WHAT IT IS – SPIRITUALITY THE ARISTOS WAY, THE ELITIST PATH, like the ROYALTY of West has been doing for thousands of years, GET IT – YOU MUST OPEN YOUR MIND, BECAUSE RIGHT NOW YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW WHO YOU ARE, LET ALONE WHAT THE FUCK IS ACTUALLY HAPPENING RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU.
So do put some effort in seeing the ‘kindness’ of what I’m saying to you today, to feeling honored by that, particularly in relation to the ALTERNATIVE, which is way worse than this BITCH. The HONOR OF YOUR GIFT WILL BECOME YOUR HOME SOON, as it replaces the ever-decreasing cycle of THE FAKE FEELINGS from FAKE YOU, as you MENTALLY STABALIZE IN YOUR ‘BETTER THAN’, YOUR SUPERIORITY TO ALL THAT IS AROUND YOU, in the REAL world of YOUR OWN PERSONAL ‘DAEMON’ that is REAL YOU… Right now you don’t really deserve this kindness, this understanding of your level, do you, so know it’s ONLY being done for those amongst you who choose wisely, BUT for the rest of you, who don’t DO ANYTHING AT ALL, will find that kindness rapidly disappear, AND THEN YOU WILL HAVE TO DEAL WITH BEING TREATED LIKE AN ANIMAL, BECAUSE THAT IS WHAT YOU HAVE CHOSEN TO BE. Yes, my conscience will be clear whatever happens, kind of the fun bit of being a teacher, but what about YOUR CONSCIENCE, eh?
However, should you choose to repay its kindness of mine, DO TRY AND BE BRAVE, SO YOU CAN BE INTERESTING, I know your life is oh so important to you, but at an animal level it is all such a LOAD of NOTHING – FORMULAIC, BANAL CYCLES OF FEAR/DESIRE/BOREDOM, CONTROLLED BY MEANINGLESS ANXIETIES ABOUT MEANINGLESS THINGS. Yep, right now there is not much to see is there, so do Try and lighten up and have a go eh, would you not like to know who the fuck you are, what this is all about, what you can do, who you can be, and most importantly, THE POWER OVER YOUR LIFE YOU CAN ‘DISPLAY’. Trust me and take a look at your life, look at the circles you go in, and KNOW THAT YOU DO NOT HAVE ANY ANSWERS DO YOU, you don’t have a fucking clue what you are doing, you just react in patterns of NOTHING. And how sad is that eh, IS THAT ALL YOU ARE, IS THAT WHAT YOU WILL GET TO REMEMBER ON YOUR DEATH BED, A FEW CHEAP THRILLS SURROUNDED BY ONE FAILURE AFTER ANOTHER.
So know now, one of the greatest ‘power ups’ I can give you is this simple realization – YOU ARE FUCKING USELESS AT BEING AN ANIMAL BECAUSE YOU ARE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE ONE, YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO ‘BE GIFTED’, which is something else entirely – AN INDIVIDUAL. Then try and find the guts to HELP YOURSELF, stop splashing around in your own personal cesspool like its a big deal, like your problems matter to anyone in this world, AND BE AN INDIVIDUAL. You never know, if you can get out of the starting blocks someone like me might just notice you for long enough to help you BECOME YOURSELF, BUT YOU HAVE TO BE WORTH IT…
SO START BEING ‘RUTHLESS’ AND BE ‘AN INDIVIDUAL’, SO YOU CAN STOP BEING ‘THE HERD’.
ONCE YOU GET STARTED YOU WILL SEE THAT YOUR VALUE IS MORE THAN HIGH ENOUGH, THERE IS NO NEED TO BE NICE.
YES, YOU MUST START AGAIN WITH YOUR CHARACTER, YOUR FRIENDS, YOUR ENVIRONMENT, AND CHANGE, OTHERWISE NOTHING ELSE WILL.
YOU MUST CHANGE ‘WHO’ YOU ARE TO BECOME ‘WHAT’ YOU ARE, WHO YOU ARE NOW IS ‘WRONG’ AND, FRANKLY, DULL AS FUCK.
SO STOP COPING WITH BEING NOTHING, GIVE UP A COMFORTER OR 2, MOVE ON FROM YOUR NASTY, and let your REAL CHARACTER rear its BEAUTIFUL HEAD UP, KICK ITS HEELS and move the fuck on. Your BASIC INCONTINIENCE IS PATHETIC, your ancestors are spinning in their graves at the APPALLING quality of your trivial badness, SO YOU HAVE NOTHING TO LOSE. Trust me, REAL YOU is way more fun than ‘what you have become’ AGAINST YOUR WILL, WAY MORE FUN THAT BEING A CHILDISH SLAVE, SURROUNDED BY ANIMAL RETARDS WHO ALL SECRETLY HATE YOU, so sell you out every single chance they get. You are being held down by your life choices, HELD AT AN ANIMAL LEVEL OF CONSCIOUSNESS FROM WHICH THERE IS NO ESCAPE, UNLESS YOU CHANGE…
And its easy, ONCE YOU HAVE THE PERSONAL POWER TO DO IT, once you are SELF-POSSESSED ENOUGH to judge yourself against your ‘BETTER THAN’, indeed everything that is right for you is easy, by definition. DO YOU UNDERSTAND NOW – WE WANT TO LOVE YOU HERE ON THE LEFT-HAND PATH OF LIFE, WE REALLY DO, BUT YOU NEED TO ‘BE LOVEABLE’ BY OUR STANDARDS, FIRST, SO BEST START THINKING SOME SHIT UP, EH – ‘YOUR GOD’, YOUR REAL YOU HELPS THOSE WHO HELP THEMSELVES, AND HE WILL HELP YOU IF YOU DO, PROMISE…
We crack on – today I will show you how to WANT TO DO this, but FIRST… we MUST add a warning:
Yes, You need to be CURIOUS today, because if you don’t make this change to your NORMAL approach to this POST then the trivial patterns of Western Society will undermine its effectiveness VERY EFFECTIVELY. These ‘lead ins’ are what I would do in person, with an obvious generalization to compensate for not knowing your type, OTHER THAN YOU ARE A GIFTED HEDONIST, so you understand ‘strong feeling’ better than NORMAL PEOPLE, AND SO BY DEFINITION YOUR CONDITIONING IS WEAKER IN CERTAIN KEY AREAS. This takes the form of a bridging piece as directly below before you read Part 4 itself – PLEASE TAKE IT SERIOUSLY, IT IS CONVERSATIONAL IN NATURE BUT IT IS ALSO QUITE IMPORTANT…
See, I have to be a bit more precise and disciplined with you for this one, so BEFORE WE START, as with all things RADICAL, there is no such thing as A TOTALLY SAFE process, BUT UNLIKE PART 3, WHERE THE RISKS TO YOUR MENTAL HEALTH ARE STATISTICALLY VERY LOW, PART 4 TODAY IS ACTUALLY DANGEROUS BECAUSE IT IS POWERFUL, OTHERWISE IT WON’T WORK.
WE NEED TO WARN YOU THAT THIS POST IS NOT HARMLESS NEW-AGE CRAP, THIS POST WILL CHANGE YOU if you follow the METHOD IT CONTAINS.
SO… if YOU are going to read on today, YOU MUST TAKE the PRECAUTIONS as I DETAIL THEM IN THE BODY COPY, WITH THE GENERAL ONES, TO SET YOU UP, BEING –
YOU MUST DO THIS IN TOTAL PRIVACY AS ‘SELF-CARE’ – THIS IS PERSONAL, TELL NO ONE.
PRACTICE THE ‘NOBODY’ PROCESS FROM PART 3 UNTIL YOU HAVE MADE SOME REAL PROGRESS, BECOMING WAY MORE SENSITIVE OF YOURSELF.
SPECIFICALLY – YOU MUST HAVE REDUCED YOUR ‘FEAR’, YOUR ‘OPINIONS’ AND ALL YOUR ‘CARES’ BEFORE THAT INTERNAL SENSITIVITY WILL DEVELOP AND BE DEEP ENOUGH TO DO THE PROCESS IN THIS POST, PART 4.
THEN GO GENTLY AND SENSITIVELY AT THE BEGINNING, WATCH WHAT HAPPENS, AND ADJUST YOUR DIRECTION AS REQUIRED.
See, Part 3 is no more dangerous than driving down a QUIET, familiar urban road at speed in the dark with your Full Beam on – it is UNLIKELY you will encounter anything BAD, AND YOU CAN EASILY AVOID THAT if you DO. It is basically a healing practice and can be used at varying levels of ‘trying’ with no real danger, much as you may experience levels of ‘anxiety’ which ARE SIMPLY part of that cleansing practice, SO IT IS BASICALLY ALL GOOD, unless you are particularly fragile, WITH AN IRRATIONAL FEAR OF THE DARK. Yes, THEY CALL IT HEART WASHING FOR A REASON, so it may sting a bit, but this is a RADICAL CHANGE, surely you EXPECTED IT TO ‘tickle a little’, DID YOU NOT? YOU are BREAKING FAKE YOU, so feel ‘happy’ when it stings – IT IS WORKING.
Part 4 takes the results of Part 3 and directs them at REAL YOU, so we can bring the POWER of Real You out of the shadows and into your CONSCIOUS life. It is like open water swimming on a calm sea, very close to the shoreline, but also in the dark, WITH NO LANE MARKINGS, JUST A SHINY WHITE BUOY TO AIM AT, all by itself, off in the distance, lit up in the moonlight. It’s just you and the water and the night, so you must both FLOAT and learn to SWIM in a consistent DIRECTION when you feel FAR MORE EXPOSED, no white lines and cat eyes TO GUIDE YOUR EVERY STEP this time. So it IS LIKELY You WILL encounter unknown and perhaps even dangerous things YOU DON’T RECOGNIZE, but they are easy to avoid by simply swimming around them, when recognized, with my help.
So what are these DANGERS? They are best referred to as ‘TRANSITIONAL’ STATES OF MIND, when something positive is starting to happen to you but your FAKE YOU takes it over and reframes it BADLY, turning it into some version of ANIEXTY or DISASSOCIATION from yourself, in attempt to re-assert its control, usually in concert with external people who don’t like any change in you, particularly if your relationship with them is Parasitic. Part 3.5 is specifically designed to deal with this issue on the 4th Way, to remind you what you are looking for, and not to get lost in the ‘weeds of yourself’, so I give you a whole range of things to work at when any of your darker moments occur, so you do not get stuck in them – YOU ARE STILL A CHILD, YOUR DARKNESSES ARE THE ISSUES OF A CHILD, DO NOT TAKE THEM SERIOUSLY, LAUGH AT THEM, AT FAKE YOU.
Yes, the GENERAL trick, in such cases, is to KEEP SWIMMING AND DON’T ‘PANIC’ (Sorry WW2…)… much as you should look up that delightfully ancient word for this one, just know if simply reading the above ‘upsets you emotionally’ STOP READING NOW – reading the above will interest the GIFTED HEDONIST MORE THAN IT SCARES THEM, if you don’t feel more intrigued than scared then this stuff is not for you, you are most likely just an animal, and should fuck off.
Yes, of course, I’m being an ‘Old Bastard’ on purpose (the clue is in the name…) just be VERY CLEAR I’m DEADLY SERIOUS about this one – THERE IS A WHOLE ‘HOST’ OF REASONS ANIMALS SHOULD REALLY NOT DO ANY OF THIS. However much that will not stop the WORST of you, it should – THIS PRACTISE USUALLY affects animals very NEGATIVELY in an obvious, EMOTIONAL way, so they stop doing it anyway, BUT SOME FOLKS DON’T WANT TO ACCEPT THIS FAILURE, cause they are stupid. So it is important not to take my otherwise rather casual style too lightly for this one – THIS ONE IS SERIOUS.
The best way to say this is simply – THE 1ST STEP IN RAISING YOUR LEVEL IS A MUCH BROADER ‘LANDSCAPE OF CONSCIOUSNESS’ THAN YOU ARE ‘USED TO’, and there are many things there that you have never heard of or know how to deal with, and hence may scare you. It is the domain of Real You, therefore it is important to pre-define the bits you want to experience up front, so your Real You knows what to show you, SO YOU CAN NOT ONLY KNOW WHAT IS HAPPENING BUT ALSO ENJOY IT, SO YOU LATCH ONTO IT. You CANNOT HEAD INTO THE BEAUTIFUL JUNGLE ‘STONED’, WEARING ‘LOUNGEWARE’ AND ‘FLIP-FLOPS’ BECAUSE SOME LITTLE THING, THAT IS OTHERWISE TRIVIAL AND TOTALLY HARMLESS, WILL ‘BITE YOU’ so you just run off screaming like a bitch. So You need the knowledge, experience and skills of an ‘Explorer’, a soldier, WHICH IS WHAT THE FRAMEWORK OF THE ARISTOS PROVIDES YOU AT A CHARACTER LEVEL – SPIRITUAL ELITISM, the Hedonist’s ‘TRUE CALLING’.
Then you will not only get much further, you will have a whole new level of fun and achievement in your life, WHICH WILL BECOME MUCH RICHER AND MORE POWERFUL. You would not believe how many GIFTED, women particularly, crash and burn at the first, often forced ‘experience’ of Spirituality simply because THEY GO INTO A DEPRESSION AFTER THE EXPERIENCE OF A LONGER THAN NORMAL ‘MOMENT OF DARK CONSCIENCE’. So, however much your Western Liberal upbringing may be fucking with your view of Elitism, know that it is part of your EVOLUTION, as Evolution needs Elitism to work – IT IS YOUR BODYGUARD, AND ON THIS PATH IT IS NOT OPTIONAL. So see part 3.5 for what it is, your training in ‘Self Defense’, without it you are simply stumbling about ‘like a baby’ expecting to find some New Age Nirvana that does not exist for you, BECAUSE YOU HAVE NOT PRE-DEFINED THE BITS YOU WANT TO SEE, WHAT YOU ARE ‘LOOKING FOR’, YOUR CHOICE OF PATH. See, there are many things in Spirituality YOU MUST CHOOSE, unless you want something ELSE to CHOOSE FOR YOU…
Don’t get me wrong, you are not ‘imagining’ this new level to be anything you want it to be, YOU ARE CHOOSING FROM THE FEW STABLE POSITIONS THAT ARE AVAILABLE AT THE START, AS YOU NEED A STABLE POSITION THAT WORKS FOR YOU IN THE REAL WORLD. See you are a HEDONIST, which is the ‘Way of Emotion’, combined with the 4th Way, the Way of the ‘Sly Man’, the people who know the short cuts from all the paths. You would not have a prayer at making the others work as a Hedonist, and a couple of them would drive you quite mad. This introduction to Spirituality must be REAL, but it must BENEFIT YOU, so please don’t underestimate just what a massive benefit the PATH OF THE ARISTOS is, why it exists and why up to a hundred years ago it WAS BY FAR THE MOST COMMON PATH IN THE WEST. All these other paths are some form of EXTREME, of suffering, of total dedication to a method that is simply beyond you, beyond any pattern you currently have, so when faced with any level of INSIGHT INTO CONSCIOUSNESS you don’t like, you will just ‘cut and run’.
So learn to DOUBLE DOWN and get used to TRIGGERING YOUR ‘BETTER THAN’ WHENEVER YOU NEED IT, AND I MEAN CASUALLY IN YOUR DAY-TO-DAY WALK OF LIFE, THEN YOU WILL FIND MANY OF EVEN YOUR EXISTING ISSUES, CHALLENGES, AND TEMPTATIONS TO ENTER INTO THE DARKNESS OF YOUR LITTLE-MORE-THAN-SOME-DUSTY-BROOM-CUPBOARD OF HEDONISM 101, WILL SIMPLY EVAPORATE. See, they were never ‘real’ in the first place, THEY ARE FAKE, JUST LIKE YOU ARE, inventions to both control you, and compensate you for being FAKE. If you don’t MAKE THIS CHOICE whatever appears will most likely be a REFLECTION OF THE ILL SHIT YOU HAVE ALREADY DONE TO YOURSELF, AND TRUST ME, YOU DON’T WANT THAT…
Next for this preface… We must revisit the KEY ASPECT of the concept of ‘getting smarter’, so you understand it at a TEXTBOOK LEVEL – YOUR ‘MOMENTS OF TRUTH’ = REAL KNOWLEDGE, outside of your interpretation, your existing patterns, what the GREEKS CALLED ‘GNOSIS’.
Yes, YOU MUST UNDERSTAND THIS PROCESS FACTUALLY, see the detail and the reason for that detail, because so you are so stupid you don’t understand anything beyond the 1st level, its FACE VALUE, YOU HAVE NO TOLERANCE FOR ‘OBLIQUENESS’. If it is not dumbed down to the ABC of a child by ME, to the simple repetition as learning you get at school then YOU WILL BLANK IT. Thats the problem with the Gen Z world we live in – NOTHING REAL IS SIMPLE UNTIL YOU UNDERSTAND IT, BUT TO UNDERSTAND IT YOU MUST SEE IT IN ALL ITS COMPLEXITY FIRST. Right now you can’t because YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND THE NEED TO USE ‘MOMENT OF TRUTHS’ INSTEAD OF YOUR EXISTING PATTERNS OF SHITE, then replace your patterns with this new Wisdom, with FELT UNDERSTANDING, and build up from the OBLIQUENESS of ‘ROOT CAUSES’.
So today I have to start this cross-over, I HAVE TO MAKE YOU SMARTER, whilst explaining what SMART is in a very simple way, so you must start to understand what I call being oblique, being COMPLEX, teaching by master patterns, rather than teaching you like a 8y/o, who can’t stop fidgeting and trying to tell me what your DAD thinks. You can’t be a TRUTH NAZI ON THE 4TH WAY, you can’t dismiss everything that you think is correct because of 1 thing you DON’T AGREE WITH, SO ITS ALL WRONG – THAT IS WHAT WE CALL BEING A ‘SILLY BITCH’. The world is full of people who HAVE TO BE RIGHT TO JUSTIFY WHAT THEY ARE – GET OVER IT, YOU ARE CHILD, there is no need to justify it, all you need to see is that you adolescent fool, who BELIEVES the world works like ‘they’ tell you it does, like it does on Social Media, that in reality is just your trivial little middle-class FAKE version of life. And it is really not like that, sorry…
So THIS is what clever is – right now when you learn anything you do so by ‘Association’, so you compare it to WHO YOU ARE AS A PATTERN, and see if it is right or wrong as INFORMATION, with no emotional component IN RELATION TO YOUR EXISTING PATTERNS, like a DOMESTICATED ANIMAL. You make this choice unconsciously, based on whether it SUITS YOUR FAKE SELF TO BELIEVE IT, so you always ask does this RIGHT fit in what I already THINK, or does it threaten me in some way – in our modern world it is called CONFIRMATION BIAS, and it DAMNS YOU. Information is not knowledge, information as FACTS IS SIMPLY NOISE, until you add an emotional component to it that shows you ITS REALNESS, ITS TRUTH, then you can use it, via this ‘MOMENT OF TRUTH’, or more usually that it INTERESTS YOU BECAUSE IT IS SIMILAR TO A PREVIOUS MOMENT OF TRUTH.
Once you have this starting point of knowledge, this POINT OF INTEREST, you can start to build it out in all the required directions – in terms of distance in the 3 dimensions of where this new bit fits in around what you already know, then scale, then in terms of time, before assigning it a level of importance and a place in your head in terms of that importance, relative to other things of importance to you. See, you need to know everything about something if you want to get smarter about some stuff that matters, otherwise you are better off knowing nothing, like you currently do about everything. You must start to focus on what is IMPORTANT and VALUE it, and de-focus on the VAST MAJORITY OF SHIT IN YOUR LIFE, as it is simply degrading you with pointless unconnected information as FACTS. Today you must start to turn facts into knowledge, INTO GNOSIS NO LESS, as the Greeks once used to say, AND THEN CONNECT THEM TOGETHER.
So TODAY MY style CHANGES, to suit this change – YOU MUST START TO CONNECT THIS STUFF TOGETHER IN TERMS OF SCALE, TIME AND PRIORITY, SO YOU LEARN IT. Moments of Truth left isolated in your mind never ‘take’, but if they develop into knowledge they become new powerful patterns. Huge chunks of the New Testament are based on this premise, on teaching you new patterns that you then use on connected things, SO YOU GET SMARTER. But YOU can’t do this yet, so I have to do it for you, in terms of how this information is displayed and understood in TERMS OF THE ARRANGEMENT OF FACTS AROUND KEY PATTERNS.
Yes, this post is a distinct change in style from the last couple – THOSE POSTS HAD TO BE ‘PERSUASIVE’ IN NATURE, WHERE AS THIS ON HAS TO BE ‘DESCRIPTIVE’. See Part 3 and 3.5 had to change your mind by getting you started with the ‘Moment of Truth’ aspect of BEING GIFTED – INTUITIVE, FELT WISDOM, rather than ‘associative reason’, which is just a collection of the horseshit you currently think re-arranged in a new way. We had to move you away from the Knowledge that is defined and categorized by your current, shitty little patterns, little more than a ‘Cows Opinion’, so it does not matter (Sorry, Joey), toward knowledge as a REALIZATION. Today that doesn’t MATTER SO MUCH, as I expect you to have made some progress, so today we need you to get this at a ‘textbook’ level, because IT IS VERY DETAILED.
Don’t get me wrong – of course, there has to be repetition and explanation, YOU HAVE THE MEMORY OF A ‘FRUIT FLY’ right now, but we can leave behind much of the DRAMA today, the need to BE EMOTIONAL reading the course of study itself. In time you will come to see just how important it is to be emotional while TRYING any of these processes, but it only matters while reading when you ARE AIMING FOR AN INTUITIVE INSIGHT TO ‘HIT’ YOU – to change your mind. That is not the point today, the point is to understand the PROCESS, by both seeing it at a higher level and KNOWING what the GOAL IS – for you to increasingly ‘FLESH OUT’ YOUR KNOWLEDGE OF RAISING YOUR LEVEL OF CONSCIOUSNESS, TO SEE HOW IT WORKS SO YOU CAN DO the TRYING IT seriosuly, AND THEN TAKE THE RESULTS OF TRYING IT TO THEN TRY IT BETTER, AND BETTER.
But this TRYING AND ITS FEEDBACK can not remain ABSTRACT, THEORETICAL, ISOLATED – YOU ARE COMMUNICATING WITH YOURSELF THROUGH THIS KNOWLEDGE, so you must build up what you KNOW from this post today around POINTS OF INTEREST, so you REMEMBER IT CORRECTLY AND IT HAS SOME PRACTICAL VALUE. Otherwise it is simply a memory test, and your FAKE YOU WILL DE-VALUE IT, so you FORGET. So when you read on now start to connect it all together, take a moment to add the knowledge around something you already believe for you AS YOU CAN RELATE TO IT, IT HAS ‘HIT’, place that new information, in front or behind it as a position, before or after it in time, more general or more detailed in terms of scale, and therefore more or less important in terms of this method.
That is how you get SMARTER, AND THEN YOU WILL UNDERSTAND HOW THIS PROCESS WORKS for you, because you will understand what is happening TO YOU – YOU WILL BE ABLE TO DO IT MUCH, MUCH BETTER THIS WAY, SO THE RESULTS WILL BE MUCH, MUCH QUICKER AND MORE PROFOUND. However much I breeze over sections I would of kicked to death previously, don’t forget this new style today, BECAUSE THE EMPHASIS ON TRYING TO UNDERSTAND HAS NOW SHIFTED ON TO YOU, my job has changed…
So the GOAL OF OUR POST TODAY…
TODAY WE ARE GOING TO START TO RAISE YOUR LEVEL OF CONSCIOUSNESS BY FOLLOWING A CIRCULAR ‘POSITIVE FEEDBACK’ PROCESS, IN 3 STAGES.
THE RESULTS OF THIS PROCESS WILL COME IN FITS AND STARTS, BIG CHUNKS AND SMALLER ONES, SO YOU MUST REPEAT IT WITH MORE EFFORT.
EVERYTHING PRIOR TO THIS HAS BEEN PREPARATION FOR THIS PROCESS, NOW YOU ACTUALLY HAVE TO ‘DO IT’ AS AN EXPERIENCE.
THIS EXPERIENCE OF DOING WILL HELP YOU UNDERSTAND IT, AND IS VERY DIFFERENT FROM KNOWING IT FACTUALLY.
THE EXPERIENCE OF DOING WILL LEAD TO ‘GNOSIS’, TO ‘CERTAINTY’ NOT ‘OPINION’ BASED ON FALSE INSTINCT.
At the start this is what TRYING is, because TRYING is the payment for GNOSIS, so you must DO in order to LEARN, just reading this stuff will DO NOTHING, like you usually do – YOU CANNOT UNDERSTAND ANYTHING AS JUST FACTS, THESE FACTS MUST CONNECT TOGETHER FAST ENOUGH TO ‘HIT’, EMOTIONALLY.
However, to understand everything I have just written I MUST MAKE VERY CLEAR YOU UNDERSTAND SOMETHING SIMPLE – YOU MUST UNDERSTAND THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN HOW A CHILD AND AN ADULT ‘THINKS’ AS A PROCESS. In truth this is one of the FUNDAMENTAL PROCESS THAT MAKES US DIFFERENT TO THE ANIMALS, SO YOU MUST EMBRACE IT, AND START TO USE IT FOR ANY CONSCIOUS ‘DIRECTED THOUGHT PROCESS’. Be clear – this is US and THEM stuff, this is A KEY PILLAR OF DIFFERENCE, so you must make this change, however UNNATURAL IT FEELS TO YOUR ‘ANIMAL LEVEL’ AT THE START…
So, THIS IS HOW GROWN UPS ‘THINK’ IN COMPARISON TO HOW YOU DO…
- ALL ANIMALS THINK VIA THE USE OF OLD PATTERNS THAT GENERATE ‘FALSE INSTINCT’ AND THEREFORE TAKE THE ‘FIRST THING THEY THINK’ AS GOSPEL AND THEN SPIN ONE MORE THOUGHT AFTER ANOTHER IN THE SAME WAY, what 4th Wayers call INTERNAL CONSIDERING.
- ALL ARISTOS THINK BY CHECKING WHAT THEY THINK AGAINST THE CONTEXT OF THE NOW, AND SO TAKE THEIR FIRST FALSE INSTINCT AND QUESTION IT FOR ‘TRUTH AS A FEELING IN THE NOW’, SO THEY STOP THEIR PATTERNS DEAD, what 4th Wayers call EXTERNAL CONSIDERING.
ARISTOS CONTROL THEIR THOUGHTS, ANIMALS DO NOT, THEY LET THEIR THOUGHTS SPIRAL ROUND AND ROUND VIA THEIR PATTERNS. An Aristos forces the single PATTERN OF TESTING THEIR THOUGHTS because they know they maybe wrong, IT MAY JUST BE A FALSE INSTINCT, THAT HAS BEEN GENERALISED, SIMPLIFIED AND STORED IN VAGUE RELATION TO THIS SCENARIO, where the actual scenario requires more examination before YOU KNOW WHAT YOU THINK about it, which in time will become WHAT YOU FEEL ABOUT IT. To be fair many of the highly gifted already do a perverted form of this FEELING LED THOUGHT, but you too still have to go through the retraining to get that right, as above.
So YOU MUST LEARN TO ‘PAUSE FOR THOUGHT’, TO SELF CHECK YOUR THOUGHTS BEFORE YOU AGREE with THEM, see them as even useful, let alone true. Animals take ANY thought as valid until it is proved wrong by the outside world SIMPLY BECAUSE IT HAS OCCURED TO THEM, LIKE A LAZY CHILD, AS IT IS YOUR ‘OWN PERSONAL REALITY’, and is therefore in some fucked and self-destructive way VALUABLE. It’s not valuable, ITS A LEVEL OF STOOOOPID THAT DAMNS YOU TO EVER INCREASING LEVELS OF STOOOPID FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE. Your entire FAKE YOU IS BUILT ON THIS MECHANISM, and the strength of your Fake You is largely defined by how much you can or cannot self check your False Instincts for actual TRUTH against the cause of those thoughts externally. The cause of your thoughts internally IS NOT RELIABLE, AND OFTEN SELF DESTRUCTIVE – IT IS SELF SABOTAGE, SO YOU NEED TO STOP THINKING THAT EVERY THOUGHT THAT OCCURS TO YOU IS VALID RIGHT NOW. These False Instincts are hugely affected by your MOOD SWINGS, and are mainly little more than your mood swing acting out via whatever is happening, WHICH IS OBVIOUSLY DUMB AS FUCK.
One of the easiest ways to do this is decide what you want to say against the effect you are trying to create BEFORE YOU SAY IT, something that animals find almost impossible – you must learn to ‘pause for thought’ AS A SELF CHECK of what you are about to say against what you want out of it. When you start this you will find THAT 80% OF WHAT YOU NORMALLY SAY HAS NO VALUE WHATSOEVER, and the other 20% is made up of OLD PATTERNS of FALSE INSTINCTS THAT YOU HAVE NOT CHECKED FOR RELEVANCE TO NOW, TO WHAT YOU WANT, SO ARE OFTEN TOTALLY WRONG FOR WHAT YOU WANT, indeed they often seem to create the exact opposite of what you actually want now, BECAUSE IT IS FAKE YOU TALKING. Most GIFTED learn young the basic mechanism of always self checking their words in relation to what is dangerous to say in certain scenarios, SO YOU ALREADY KNOW HOW TO FILTER YOUR TRUTH, you just don’t do it much in day to today life, SO YOUR FAKE SELF OWNS YOU, CONTROLS YOU via AUTOMATIC REACTIONS YOU HAVE NO CONTROL OVER.
Do not UNDERESTIMATE THIS PRACTICE OF ‘CONSCIOUS TALKING’, it is often a major doorway into seeing your SELF-SABOTAGE, and is closely related to the DEAD FACE ISSUE, where you have no control over your reactive facial expressions, THAT THEN TOTALLY GIVE YOU AWAY, and dominate the effect you have on others UNCONSCIOUS TO WHAT YOU ARE SAYING. For many gifted the combination of these 2 issues can make their communications into an uncontrolled nightmare, where nothing makes sense, AS WHAT YOU ARE DOING IS NOT WHAT YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING, as your secret cleverness is simply hiding your self-destruction from you. Try and SEE this clearly – RIGHT NOW YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW YOU COME ACROSS BECAUSE YOU HAVE NO CONTROL OVER IT, SO YOU NEED TO TAKE CONTROL OVER IT IN ORDER TO FIX IT. Only then can you START TO TRUST IT, because CONTROL OVER YOURSELF IS WHAT POWER OVER YOURSELF FEELS LIKE…
The trick to doing this practice WELL AT THE START is very simple – STOP AND THINK ABOUT YOUR GOAL, THE EFFECT YOU WANT TO CREATE BY WHAT YOU ‘CHOOSE’ TO SAY BEFORE YOU SAY ANYTHING, AT THE EXACT MOMENT YOU NEED TO REACT, NOT IN ADVANCE OF THE CONVERSATION ITSELF. YOU MUST STOP YOUR AUTOMATIC REACTION, YOUR FALSE INSTINCT, that is what to pause for thought is, and it will make you THINK MUCH, MUCH QUICKER THAN YOUR NORMALLY DO. Otherwise it will be a long, embarrassing pause, MUCH AS YOU NOW UNDERSTAND WHERE THE SLOW TALKING GRAVITAS, THIS ‘DIGNITY OF THE ARISTOS’ COMES FROM, THIS EXACT PRACTICE, which will help you when you read the rest of this post. BUT KNOW MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE – You must SPEED UP YOUR COGNITION, THINK FASTER TO DO THIS.
Now, before we finish I’m going to show you how several of the Master Patterns on GNOSIS play out as actual insight, knowledge in local, useful thought. This is a small step in reality but it is A KEY PART OF BEING CLEVERER EVERY DAY, ALL THE TIME, SPECIFICALLY ABOUT BEING OPEN MINDED, OPEN TO A CHANGE IN WHAT YOU NORMALLY DO, TO TRYING SOMETHING DIFFERENT IN THE MOMENT, OUTSIDE OF YOUR EGO SAFETY, YOUR PATTERNS OF FALSE, CHILDISH INSTINCT.
Ok, so this is how you USE Master Patterns, the actual mechanisms of using these patterns that are generic, this is how they work to make you smarter, BY MAKING YOU MUCH QUICKER AT SEEING THINGS ‘CORRECTLY’:
- BALANCE/THE GOLDEN MEAN – You must look at both sides of something, good and bad, before taking a position IN THE MIDDLE BECAUSE THAT IS THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN, AND THAT HEIGHT ALLOWS YOU TO SEE FURTHER MENTALLY. So for example Anticipation is a VERY USEFUL THING WHEN USED CORRECTLY, say as part of the Better Than EVOKING process from part 3.5, but is VERY DANGEROUS WHEN ABUSED BY FAKE YOU AS ‘A GLAMOUR’. Never pick a side as Right or Wrong in ALL CASES FOR ANY LOCAL ACTIVITY, because you will make yourself DUMBER for everything else that is not the same as that case, collect a large number of cases and see the MIDDLE OF THE PROCESS, WHICH IS USUALLY THE TRUTH, but not always…
- PRECURSORS/TELLS – You need to SEE IT COMING, Fake You needs to set up many of the worst situations in your life, they are not simple, so you often have many opportunities to see something happening in advance, as most people Fake You use the same simple cycles over and over again, BUT YOU MUST LOOK FOR THEM AND RECOGNIZE THEM ‘NEXT TIME’. A classic example is Conscious Talking, where when Fake You is 100% active you will find that in the moment of doubting what you want to Say your mind goes BLANK, and you can either say what Fake You wants you to say or NOTHING, and its actually hard to say nothing. This is a Tell you are acting completely unconsciously, with no thought, SO STOP, AND STEP BACK BEFORE YOU DOING SOMETHING STUPID, BECAUSE FAKE YOU IS DRIVING AND IS ABOUT TO MAKE BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO YOU.
- STACKING/JIGSAW CONCEPT – You need to combine small TRUTHS into BIGGER TRUTHS in order to USE them in your development effectively, to build islands of stability that you can return to in thought that you are more sure of, and ones that you are now less sure of, in order to CHANGE YOUR MIND ABOUT THINGS. You do this by taking KNOWLEDGE as Moments of Truth, and starting to place other relevant facts around them, while taking FALSE, fake things you used to think and assigning them as False Instincts of FAKE YOU. This is how you build the concept of your Deputy Steward, your Aristos from positive aspects of yourself that want you to improve, separate to the negative aspects of your character that seek your self-destruction, that BLEED YOU. Stack the positive stuff UP, make it bigger, give it authority through trusting it, but tear the negative stuff down, de-construct it into small bits, and take away its authority over you.
- DISTANCE/WINNING BY LOSING – You need to devalue what you ‘want’ in the moment, to get what you want overall as a goal, by using the moment to deliver that goal, EVEN IF YOU ‘LOSE’ THE MOMENT. You must stand back and learn to manipulate your current character, and devalue what it wants – YOUR CURRENT CHARACTER IS SHIT, LIKE A LOWLY RATED CHAR IN A COMPUTER GAME AT THE START, BUT YOUR ARE THE PLAYER, SO YOU HAVE DISTANCE FROM THE CHAR which enables you to look at it and see what you want to improve and what you want to remove, change, get better stuff to replace. So for example you must almost devalue your EGO SAFETY AS A REACTION, BY BEING PREPARED TO DOUBT YOURSELF, your opinion, your old normal, as it is part of FAKE YOU, SO IS ALMOST ALWAYS WRONG or DESTRUCTIVE TO WHAT YOU ACTUALLY WANT.
So to finish I will GIVE YOU the first stable conclusion of this method – YOU MUST SEE THAT THE ONLY THING TO FEAR IS FEAR ITSELF, AS FEAR ITSELF, FEAR OF ANYTHING THAT IS NOT ACTUAL PHYSICAL DEATH IS FAKE YOU CONTROLLING YOU. You must SEE IT coming, as what it REALLY is, when you feel that IRRATIONAL, EGOIC fear in the moment, AND ‘PAUSE FOR THOUGHT’, so you can try and see what Fake You is actually trying to get you to do, so you can STOP IT. Then you will start to get much quicker at SEEING THE TRUTH IN THE MOMENT AS YOU START TO STACK ALL THESE NEW PATTERNS OF TRUTH TOGETHER, even if you feel compelled to go through with your reaction at the start, as you are not BIG ENOUGH YET.
Understand this VERY CLEARLY NOW – Fake You makes you CONSCIOUSLY WANT TO DO SOMETHING NOW, THAT UNCONSCIOUSLY DELIVERS SOMETHING ELSE YOU REALLY DON’T CONSCIOUSLY WANT = SELF HARM. That is how Fake You works, that is why your life is shit, WHY YOU ARE WAY LESS, WAY DUMBER, AND WAY MORE CONFUSED AND UNHAPPY THAN YOU SHOULD BE, AS A GIFTED ARISTOS. You must start to see this happening at the time and STOP IT.
YOU MUST LEARN TO FEAR YOUR FAKE YOU ENOUGH TO BE ALWAYS ON THE LOOK OUT FOR IT, ITS SIGNATURE AND GET BETTER AT SEEING IT COMING.
START WITH SMALL THINGS, FORGETFULNESS, CLUMSINESS, FRIDGE BLINDNESS, THEN FIND BIGGER TYPES OF YOUR ‘KNOWN’ SELF HARM.
THERE ARE MANY TELLS TO SEE THESE BUT THE EASIEST ONES TO SPOT ARE ALWAYS MOOD CHANGES JUST BEFORE THE ACCIDENT OCCURS.
THEN YOU WILL START TO GET MUCH BIGGER AND MUCH QUICKER, AS THAT FEAR OF FAKE YOU WILL WORK FOR YOU, NOT AGAINST YOU.
YOU WILL ACTUALLY RAISE YOUR LEVEL OF NORMAL CONSCIOUSNESS SIMPLY BY TRYING TO DO THIS, AND IT IS REALLY EASY… The greatest GIFT a Gifted Seeker can ever give themselves at the start is the MOMENT OF TRUTH where you REALIZE your LITTLE ACCIDENTS ARE NOT ACCIDENTAL, they are planned in advance by your FALSE unconscious patterns that actually WANT THEM TO HAPPEN. See, those same patterns are also RESPONSIBLE FOR THE BIG ACCIDENTS, the life-changing stuff, often by combining several small things as accidents together to FUCK YOU ON PURPOSE, over and over again. So PAY ATTENTION, and get them small – ITS ALWAYS EASY TO START WITH THE SMALL STUFF WHEN YOU ARE CHANGING.
SO YOU MUST LEARN TO ‘FEAR YOURSELF’, YOUR HABITUAL PATTERNS AS NOT NORMAL, AS SELF-DESTRUCTIVE.
THEN YOU WILL LEARN TO SEE FAKE YOU ‘DISTINCTLY’, AS SEPARATE TO ‘YOU’, BECAUSE YOU WILL LOOK FOR IT AND SEE THESE FALSE INSTINCTIVE REACTIONS POP INTO YOUR HEAD LIKE AN ACTUAL INSTINCTIVE PAIN OCCURS WHEN YOU CUT YOURSELF.
SO YOU WILL LEARN WHAT YOU CAN TRUST CONSCIOUSLY, ‘OVER’ WHAT YOUR UNCONSCIOUS TWAT IS ACTUALLY DOING TO YOU.
BUT DON’T GET ALL SCARED AND UPSET, YOUR FAKE YOU IS A ‘BAD JOKE’, so YOU MOCK IT LIKE A FOOL – THIS IS THE REASON THE MEDIEVAL ARISTOCRACY OF OLD USED TO HAVE RETAINERS WHO ‘ACTED THE FOOL’ AND TOOK THE PISS OUT OF THEM…
SEE THIS IS THE ARISTOS WAY, WE ‘DEPRECIATE’ OUR FAKE CHARACTER, AND LET OUR ‘QUALITY’ DO THE TALKING.
SO LEARN TO FEAR ‘MAKING A FOOL OF YOURSELF’, IN FRONT OF YOUR REAL YOU, YOUR CONSCIENCE, IT IS BY FAR THE EASIEST WAY INTO A CONTINUAL, CONSISTENT LEVEL OF FORCED SELF-CONSCIOUSNESS.
THIS FEAR WILL COME NATURALLY TO YOU IF YOU ARE GIFTED, YOU MAY EVEN REMEMBER IT FROM CHILDHOOD…
YOU MUST GET SMARTER TODAY, SO YOU MUST BE SELF-AWARE, AND FEAR OF YOURSELF IS A GREAT WAY TO DO THAT, TO USE YOUR ATTENTION ON YOURSELF TO HELP YOURSELF RATHER THAN BE LOST IN ABSTRACT, FANTASY DAYDREAMS OR THE FALSE OBLIGATIONS YOU NEED TO MOTIVATE YOURSELF TO DO ANYTHING. See at your level of animal consciousness you need to be forced to DO anything CONSISTENTLY, otherwise, you fall right back into COMFORT – THE LIFE OF A SLAVE IS ALL YOU KNOW, TO THE POINT THAT YOU ACTUALLY WANT IT NOW. You cannot go on with this, with BEING CONTROLLED BY THE FEAR/DESIRE/BOREDOM CYCLE AS YOU BOUNCE BACK AND FORTH BETWEEN COMFORT AND OBLIGATION – YOU MUST THINK FOR YOURSELF, DO WHAT YOU NEED TO DO, AND DEVELOP YOURSELF.
Be clear, as you really should of figured out by now, your life at an ANIMAL LEVEL OF CONSCIOUSNESS is made up of ROUTINES, the same patterns OVER AND OVER AGAIN, and you cannot change your reliance on routines until you LEVEL UP. However you CAN GET SMARTER AND SEE WHAT IS HIDDEN IN YOUR NORMAL BY FAKE YOU, AND CHANGE YOUR ROUTINES OFTEN, AS A NEW MASTER ROUTINE IN ITSELF, FOR THE SAKE OF CHANGE – CHANGE YOURSELF AS A HABIT, do and be something different AS MUCH AS YOU CAN. See it simply – the level of a comfort chasing moron that is the ANIMAL LEVEL is not good enough, is not going to get you anywhere because simply by chasing that comfort as SMART, AS CLEVER ‘YOU’ will keep you trapped in your NORMAL NOTHINGNESS FOREVER. You are controlled by THE WAY your level WORKS, AND IT IS A VERY POWERFUL DEVICE BECAUSE IT RELIES ON A SIMPLE TRICK THAT IS SO SMALL AND ROUTINE IT IS VERY HARD TO SEE IN THE MOMENT OF CONSCIOUS CHOICE.
Look at it this way – I once taught a good, committed student at an early stage to lessen his fear, for which he used heights as his test, and got to the point he wanted to SHOW ME THE IMPROVEMENT. So I told him to climb out of a ground-floor window and then up onto the flat roof of the sunroom we were sitting in AS AN EASY TEST. He climbed outside, picked a spot and attempted to lever himself up over the eves and drainpipe of the roof 3 times, each time falling back onto the grass before cursing and trying again. I then got up and climbed through the window, looked around and saw that to the side of the window the frame was built in such a way that you could simply zigzag up the side BY STEPPING UP, so walked up and stood on the roof IN NO MORE THAN 3SECS. I then asked him why he did not see that, and after a moments thought he confessed he did see the easy root, but ALSO SAW THE CONCRETE PATH BELOW IT, WHERE HIS CHOSEN ROUTE HAD GRASS UNDERNEATH IT, SO IT WAS (SLIGHTLY) SAFER TO FALL ON THE GRASS THAN THE CONCRETE. He had already accepted he was going to fail, so he chose the path OF THE LEAST PAINFUL FAILURE FOR HIM, FOR HIS BODY AND HIS EGO.
Now I want you to see this as clear as you can, so understand – HE CHOSE THE WORST ROUTE POSSIBLE BECAUSE THE EASIEST, QUICKEST AND BEST ROUTE LOOKED MORE DANGEROUS IF HE FAILED ‘BY COMPARISON’. All change is like this, BECAUSE FAKE YOU WANTS YOU TO FAIL, SO GETS YOU TO MAKE VERY POOR CHOICES BY THE USE OF AVERSION TO SIMPLE THINGS. This CON is not rare, not complicated, not hard to arrange so only done for big stuff, THIS IS THE PREFERRED CON OF EVERYONES FAKE YOU, to make success look hard or dangerous when it is not, IN ORDER TO DRAG YOU TO FAILURE, every fucking day. It is childs play, BECAUSE YOU THINK IT IS SMART TO ALWAYS CHOOSE COMFORT OVER CHALLENGE, AND EVEN WHEN YOU CHOOSE CHALLENGE YOU STILL LOOK FOR THE EASIEST, SAFEST ROUTE, instead of the BEST ROUTE to the goal. This is how ALL fake you wear you down, get you to both expect and accept failure, TO THE POINT THAT YOU CAN’T EVEN TRY ANYMORE BECAUSE, HELL – WHAT’S THE POINT.
You must break this SPELL OVER YOU before you raise your level, so you must STEP UP AND USE THE STUFF I AM GIVING BOTH ABOVE AND BELOW ON YOUR OWN LIFE, EVERY DAY, TO BREAK THAT SPELL – ‘THE GOAL’ IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN ‘THE PROCESS’, so PLAN BACK FROM THE GOAL TO YOU IN ORDER TO PICK THE BEST ROUTE, NOT FROM WHERE YOU THINK YOU ARE STARTING TO THE GOAL, AS THAT WILL ALWAYS ‘LOOK HARDER’ BY COMPARISON TO OTHER DUMBER ROUTES YOU COULD TAKE, GIVEN WHERE YOU ARE STANDING NOW. Imagine ‘being at the goal’ and then go back in reverse to where you are now as best you can and LOOK AT WHAT EMERGES ON THE WAY – YOUR SUCCESS IN REACHING THE GOAL MATTERS MORE THAN YOUR COMFORT OF THE PROCESS, OBVIOUSLY, so why care about the process…
Always choose the path of ‘most challenge against your FEAR’, always say FUCK IT, lets give it a go first AND see how far you get, RATHER THAN SEEING THE FAILURE, THE DANGER, THE LACK OF COMFORT IN THE ROUTE, and therefore NOT EVEN TRY IT. YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU ARE DOING, BUT I DO, so You must STEP UP and start to use this KNOWLEDGE TODAY, it cannot remain theoretical, like a hobby, it has to BECOME YOUR LIFE, YOUR EVERY DAY – see that at the next level of real ‘GOAL BASED CHALLENGE’ fighting your issues will actually BECOME ‘YOUR COMFORT’.
Trust me, if you don’t STEP UP then you will continue to step-down, and when you have ‘bled out’ enough, no matter how highly gifted you once were, YOU WILL START TO FEEL EMPTY, EXHAUSTED ALL THE BLOODY TIME, drained of your life force, listless, disinterested, AND CONFUSED, MORE AND MORE CONFUSED BY YOUR STUPID ANIMAL MOOD SWINGS. Yes, the stereotypical FATE of the ‘Party Girl’ waits for all unschooled gifted, to become so drained by your hedonism, your BASIC INCONTINENCE that all you can do is FEEL VAGUE SENSATION, you have no other choices, AND END UP DRIFTING TOWARD THE EMPTINESS OF DEPRESSION, AS THE NUMBNESS OF ‘SPIRITUAL WEAKNESS’ OVERWHELMS YOU, all dazed and confused in a medicated haze.
Then you won’t even remember your treasured FUN, ANY OF IT, as eventually you won’t even remember yourself – YOU WON’T EVEN KNOW WHO THE FUCK YOU ARE ANYMORE…
GET SMARTER, FAST – YOUR SPIRITUAL DECLINE ‘IS’ YOUR INCREASING STUPIDITY, YOUR ROBOTIC UNCONSCIOUSNESS.
KNOW THAT IF YOU ALREADY ‘BLACK OUT’ WHILE AWAKE YOUR LEVEL IS ALREADY DANGEROUSLY LOW – LEARN TO FEAR YOURSELF!
ONCE YOU START HAVING ‘PANIC ATTACKS’, THE IRRATIONAL ANXIETIES OF ‘DESPERATION’, IT IS IMPOSSIBLE TO FIX WITHOUT A STRONG TEACHER…
But PLEASE, PLEASE, PRETTY FUCKING PLEASE DON’T DELUDE YOURSELF – DON’T MAINLINE YOUR STUPIDITY LIKE A DRUG OF CHOICE TO ABSOLVE YOURSELF OF BLAME, WEAR YOUR IGNORANCE LIKE A SUIT OF EGOIC ARMOUR IN AN ATTEMPT TO PROTECT YOURSELF FROM BLAME. Don’t COMFORT YOURSELF THAT WHAT HAPPENS THESE DAYS IS ‘NORMAL’, THAT SEVERE MENTAL HEALTH ISSUES ARE A ‘COFFEE TABLE’ TALKING POINT – THEY CAN’T FIX THIS SHIT, THEY JUST MAKE IT HURT A LITTLE BIT LESS AS YOU SLOWLY GO CRAZY. Medical science can’t help you, ONLY YOU CAN HELP YOU, there are enough ‘lost souls’ in this world, they don’t need anymore – SO STOP ACTING LIKE ONE.
YOU MUST KEEP YOUR ENERGY FOR YOURSELF TO BECOME YOURSELF, NOT GIVE YOURSELF AWAY FOR THE PETTY THRILL OF FEELING IT GO…
DO YOU UNDERSTAND YET? YOUR ‘FAKE FUN’ IS DESTROYING YOUR ABILITY TO HAVE ‘REAL FUN’, YOU ARE CHASING YOUR OWN DEATH…
BUT WHEN YOU LEARN TO USE THE CAUSE OF YOUR BASIC, YOUR REAL YOU TO GROW YOU, THEN YOU ‘CHASE LIFE’ – YOU GET BIGGER.
MANY OF YOU WILL BE SURPRISED JUST HOW LITTLE DIFFERENCE THERE IS BETWEEN INCONTINENCE AND GROWTH, AS FOR MANY IT IS A SIMPLE TWIST AT THE END OF YOUR BASIC, WHERE YOU ‘COME TO’, INSTEAD OF ‘GOING AWAY’, INDEED MANY OF YOU MAY HAVE ALREADY STUMBLED ONTO IT, AS I DID… BUT THAT IS NOT ENOUGH, YOU MUST KNOW THE DIFFERENCE, OTHERWISE YOUR BASIC IS A LOTTERY, AND YOUR FAKE YOU WILL ALWAYS ENSURE YOU LOSE MORE THAN YOU WIN, SO YOU HAVE TO FIX YOUR BASIC INCONTINENCE BEFORE YOU GO ANY FURTHER – TO ‘STABILIZE’ YOURSELF…
SO BE CLEAR –
ALL UNSCHOOLED GIFTED HEDONISTS WHO GO ON WITH THEIR BASIC INCONTINENCE, EXPANDING IT IN A VAIN ATTEMPT AT CHASING ‘THE MAGIC’ OF IT WEAKEN THEMSELVES INTO DEPRESSION, OR THEY GO INSANE AND DIE, EVEN BY THEIR OWN HANDS, OR THE HANDS OF THEIR PARASITES.
Yes, you have guessed it, THIS IS THE WAY OF THE ARISTOS, THE ‘MIDDLE WAY’ OF SPIRITUAL DEVELOPMENT, we teach you how to ‘FIND YOU’, we don’t teach you how to hand yourself over to the ‘One God’ or to REAL YOU either, we teach you how to BE YOURSELF IN THIS WORLD, BETWEEN THE 3 BITS OF YOU THAT EXIST – REAL YOU (YOUR SPIRIT), CONSCIOUS YOU THE OBERSEVER (YOUR SOUL) AND FAKE YOU (YOUR BODY). Yes, remember, your FAKE YOU DOES NOT EXIST AS A CHARACTER, it is simply a set of patterns you identity with as memories in your body, a bad tattoo that you have never been arsed enough to remove, but which of you could smash with little more effort than it takes to drop a glass if you knew how. Just as long as you FOLLOW MY GUIDANCE TODAY, AND HAVE SOMETHING ELSE THERE WHEN YOU DO, OTHERWISE IT WILL FEEL LIKE EMPTY ‘DISSASSOCIATION’…
Yes, You must walk your own path, be brave enough to FIND THE MIDDLE OF YOU BY ‘CREATING THAT MIDDLE OF YOU’ OUT OF ALL THAT BEST OR USEFUL IN YOU. See many of you will discover that being REAL YOU, FROM BACK IN SOME DISTANT TIME AND PLACE IS NO LONGER ACCEPTABLE, just as I did, AND THAT IS FINE – THAT IS THE REASON FOR THIS PATH, AS IT IS THE PATH OF THE UNGODLY, THE NONE RELIGIOUS, WHO REFUSE TO SERVE SOMEONE ELSE GOD, just like you are. But don’t worry, however dramatic that sounds, as THAT IS WHAT YOU ARE ALREADY TRYING TO DO, JUST VERY, VERY BADLY, because no one has explained this stuff to you before – NO ONE HAS EXPLAINED THE REASON THAT CLASS SYSTEMS EXIST BECAUSE THEY HAVE TOO – THEY ARE NATURAL ‘LEVELS OF CONSCIOUSNESS’. Everyone in the world of spirit knows this, there are 10,000S of people walking your planet right now that FOLLOW THESE SYSTEMS, and even YOUR EVERYDAY Catholic priests LOOK DOWN ON YOU.
Yes, you MUST GET SMARTER TODAY, GET BIGGER, SO PUT SOME SLOW, BIG SOUNDSTAGE MUSIC ON IN THE BACKGROUND AND READ THIS PREFACE OVER AND OVER AGAIN UNTIL YOU FEEL YOU HAVE GOT BIGGER. Does not have to be Wagner, even Lisa Gerrard, just try and find some none-animal, none trance mania music to help awaken your spirit enough for you to be conscious OF IT AS A MOOD, even ‘Don’t Blame Me’ or ‘Take me to Church’ is better than nothing but maybe try something a little more ‘Gods Country’ this time, ‘Wasted On You’, hell even ‘Buy Me a Boat’, should you have found the spiritual joy that is ‘country music’, but do try and kick it up a notch, eh. Good, profound music is your friend on this path WHEN IT MAKES YOU BIGGER, BUT IT IS YOUR ENEMY WHEN IT MAKES YOU SMALL AND TENSE, LIKE A LITTLE HARMLESS ANIMAL, LOST IN YET ANOTHER ANTI-HERO FANTASY OF POWER, SEX AND VIOLENCE, like a lonely child left playing with toys lost in some imaginary dream world, because no one serious bothers with them anymore = YOUR WHOLE SAD LITTLE LIFE.
So know – I DON’T BLAME YOU, I get that your ‘LOVE MADE YOU CRAZY’ (Sorry, Taylor), and now the magic of you may consist of little more than metaphorically slashing yourself with a razor for the trivial enjoyment of whichever banal little type of parasite is passing by. I get it, WAY BETTER THAN MOST TEACHERS OF MY ‘ILK’, I REALLY BLOODY DO, so it is now TIME FOR ‘YOU’ TO ‘GET THE FUCK OVER IT’ and move on – WHAT YOU HAVE BEEN THROUGH IS SIMPLY THE PRICE OF ENTRY TO ‘THE PATH OF THE ARISTOS’, so lets hope there is still some ‘Box Office’ left in you, eh babe. Yes, you may well have passed the first test, but there are plenty more to come, AND THE ONE IN THIS POST TODAY IS ‘A BIGGIE’ because it’s an ‘ACID TEST’, as you might say, AS THAT IS HOW ‘DIGNITY’ WORKS – DIGNITY IS THE POWER THAT ENABLES ‘THE FEAR OF MAKING A FOOL OF YOURSELF’, which works like an ACID ON FAKE YOU…
So lets get on with shall we… let help you get over your ‘Sweet But Psycho’ (Sorry Ava), your ‘Dark Horse’ (Sorry Katy), your inner Evanesence, lets see if we can DO SOMETHING WITH YOU, if you are US, or sadly if all of your ‘freak show’ has been for nothing, AND YOU ARE THEM – your current character is simply a public excuse for being a private nothing, so why not stop being nothing instead, eh..? Or do you want until you are desperate, TILL YOUR ENERGY IS SO LOW YOU NEED FEAR TO GET OUT OF BED, until you need 3 pills a day to cope with CHAT MESSAGES, until you ‘BLEED OUT’, whilst comforting yourself that this is perfectly acceptable now, AS YOU ARE STILL CONSUMING…
Given all the prep I’ve just given you the rest of this today is really SIMPLE, just as long as you see through the complexity first, AND OPEN YOUR MIND – TODAY I’M GOING TO PUT SOME MANNERS ON YOU, so best get used to being honest, at least with yourself. Today you will finally see WHAT THE PATH OF THE ARISTOS IS, THE PATH OF ROYALTY, THE PATH THAT WAS PERFECTED IN THE WEST THOUSANDS OF YEARS AGO, before being forgotten as a relic in our age of SOCIAL JUSTICE FOR DEGENERATE ANIMALS, which is even more bizarre when you realize its an ‘equality’ they don’t even want, as all they really want is INSTA fame AND STRONGER, CHEAPER, FASTER drugs, SO THEY CAN FEEL FAKE ‘BETTER THAN’ for a moment…
THAT’S NOT YOU IS IT, you have not become professionally FAKE now, YOUR POINT IS NOT TO GET DORKS TO GIVE YOU ‘MONEY FOR NOTHING’? You are not picking a side in some GLOBAL CONFLICT, ILLEGAL IMMIGRATION DEBATE OR RELIGIOUS WAR based purely on its ability to HELP YOU develop enough CLOUT to monetize and get rich, so you can quit the job you hate, and work from some TASELESSLY decorated, but artfully photographed condo like a ‘Mattress Actress’, alternatively posting pictures of your heavily damaged ass, your bland tropical vacations and the shiny new Porsche 911 that you can’t drive.
Sorry, but if it is then best fuck off now, we wish you well of course, but simply point out if you are prepared to PROSTITUE YOUR ANIMAL ADVANTAGE AND MAKE UP SKILLS WHILST STICKING INCREASINGLY BIZARE OBJECTS INTO YOURSELF FOR THE SAKE OF AN EASY LIFE THEN YOU HAVE NO VALUES, so deserve what is going to happen to you – YOU HAVE FALLEN BELOW THE NOISE FLOOR OF LIFE, SO NO ONE CARES HUN. Change or Die, surely you can’t be surprised by this – PEOPLE PLEASING IS SIMPLY LAZY, AND HAS BEEN SINCE THE BEGINNING OF TIME, so you can’t be surprised when everyone assumes YOU ARE NOTHING…
For the Rest of You, the Best of You, I hope you ENJOY READING THIS AS MUCH AS I DID WRITING IT – so let’s keep it real today, LET’S MOVE YOU ON, ‘FAST’, by showing you how you should FEEL, ALL THE BLOODY TIME, AND ‘WHY’ YOU SHOULD FEEL LIKE THAT, SO YOU CAN ‘ACTUALLY’ DO IT… Yeah, its cool, your ‘GRAB A COP GUN KINDA CRAZY’ (Sorry again Ava) was just a phase, so best get the fuck over it, while you still can, you silly bitch – GET SMARTER BY SEEING YOUR PATTERNS, UNDERSTANDING HOW BAD PATTERNS WORK, AND THEN GET BETTER PATTERNS, your BASIC IS NOT FUN, IT NEVER WAS, YOUR BASIC INCONTINENCE IS DESIGNED TO KEEP YOU STUCK AT AN ANIMAL LEVEL OF NOTHING, FOREVER, BY LETTING FAKE YOU ‘BLEED REAL YOU’.
And you already know this – SO PLEASE BURN THIS INTO YOUR HEAD:
RIGHT NOW I KNOW YOU BETTER THAN YOU DO, BECAUSE YOU ARE A STEREOTYPE OF YOUR KIND – A SOCK PUPPET.
THERE IS NO INDIVIDUALITY IN YOUR CHARACTER, BECAUSE YOU HAVE NO CHARACTER, YOU ARE TOTALLY FAKE.
YOU ARE CANNON FODDER, A BADLY SCRIPTED MINOR BADDIE IN THE EARLY LEVELS OF A GAME DESIGNED TO BE ‘EASY TO KILL’…
YET WITH A SMALL AMOUNT OF EFFORT YOU COULD BE WHAT YOU SHOULD BE, WHAT YOU WERE BORN TO BE:
AN INDIVIDUAL = SELF-POSSESSED = ‘THE BIG PICTURE’.
So decide now, DO YOU want to spent the rest of your life being CREEPY OR CLASSY, SADASS OR BADASS? If any of the above HIT you as REAL then its BADASS, so keep reading, but if you are still looking for ‘petty advantage’, for ‘gossip’, for ‘lifestyle tips’ as simple facts, then its SADASS, so know if you decide to keep reading I WANT YOU TO FAIL, SO I’VE MADE THIS MUCH HARDER FOR YOU TO UNDERSTAND, just like all 4th way teachers have done since the beginning of time…
But the real reason for all this additional PREFACE today is that I have become aware that several GIFTED folks I know who read this have failed to get some of the foundation concepts of the 4th way at the right level of priority – SO I HAVE USED THIS PART TO MAKE THEM CLEARER AND IMPORTANT. Therefore don’t be SHY, read this again AND AGAIN if you did not feel the HIT, at least as an ‘unexpected level of interest’ in something you need to DO, now…
Did that help, did any of that HIT..? Feeling a little smarter about yourself already? Ok, so we START, sure many of you have learnt something and now have some Islands of interest, SO LETS GET TO THE GUTS OF IT NOW – TODAY WE HAVE TO LIFT YOU OUT OF YOUR ‘MOMENT TO MOMENT’ REALITY AND START TO SEE THE BIG PICTURE, ABOVE THOSE MOMENTS, ALL THE TIME. This is the key FELT DIFFERENCE between an ANIMAL AND AN ARISTOS – see even when Animals TRY and be BIGGER they are just being bigger in that MOMENT, shortly to be replaced with a much smaller moment. Today you must first grasp that to INCREASE YOUR LEVEL MEANS YOU HAVE TO JUMP TO A LEVEL ‘ABOVE YOUR MOMENTS’, that literally exists AT THE SAME TIME AS YOUR MOMENTS BUT IS NOT THE SAME.
You cannot try and think this change, YOU MUST HAVE THE SPARE ENERGY TO USE FOR THAT JUMP AND THEN ‘TRY’ AND FEEL YOUR WAY TO THAT CHANGE – RAISING YOUR LEVEL IS AN EXERCISE IN FOCUSED ‘SELF-CONSCIOUSNESS’. So you must put yourself in a specific MOOD and then direct your ATTENTION in a specific way in order to make that JUMP, you must do it over and over again until those JUMPS get higher and higher, until one day they start to STICK, and you find the ‘ledge’ above your current level that you can balance on, and keep that level. How slow or fast this goes is TOTALLY DEPENDANT ON WHAT YOU STARTED WITH, WHAT IS LEFT OF IT, AND MOST IMPORTANTLY WHAT YOU HAVE AVAILABLE TO YOU IN THE MOMENT OF ‘TRYING’, HOW MUCH MONEY YOU HAVE TO BUY THIS JUMP, that you have not pissed away on your BASIC. So we have to work on SAVING YOUR ENERGY at the same time, OTHERWISE ‘THE POVERTY OF YOUR SOUL’ WILL MAKE YOU FAIL, as you simply don’t have the money left to BE SOMEBODY…
TODAY WE HAVE TO DRAG YOUR ATTENTION OUT OF THE MOMENT.
WE DO THAT SO YOU CAN BOTH ‘SAVE YOURSELF’ AND ‘BUILD YOURSELF’.
TO WORK FAST WE NEED A TO USE A POWERFUL DRUG YOU WERE BORN WITH – ‘DIGNITY’.
SO YOU NEED TO LEARN HOW TO LET YOUR BODY MAKE MUCH MORE OF IT, AND THEN USE IT EFFECTIVELY.
THEN YOU WILL ENJOY BEING ‘BETTER THAN’, SO YOU WILL CHASE THIS SUPERIOR FEELING BY DOING ‘BETTER THAN’.
Then you will CHANGE, because you want to, as OLD YOU WILL BE A SAD, TRIVIAL, CRAVEN LITTLE TWAT, you neither like or recognize. But it is not enough to just lose interest in your moments via lessening your FEAR, you must ACTIVELY CREATE AN ALTERNATIVE TO YOUR MOMENTS, that is bigger, longer and stronger MOOD STATE. See all your current moments are made up of one petty animal feeling after another, which is why you chase your BASIC AS A WAY TO TRY AND CONTROL THEM. If you don’t CREATE THIS NEW MOOD then you simply fall into the category of the DISINTERESTED ROYAL, where ‘everything is so boring’, because you no longer have any FEAR driven ‘CARES’ – IT IS STILL FAKE YOU WHO ‘DOES’.
It is much easier to DO ALL OF WHAT FOLLOWS WHEN YOU REALIZE YOU ARE ‘STUCK IN A MOMENT AS A MOOD, AND YOU CAN’T GET OUT’, indeed as you age you will become progressively stuck in the same moment, and your world will get VERY, VERY SMALL. Your moments become your HIDEOUT from yourself, and hence the PRISON YOU LIVE IN, because you can never leave, AS YOUR PETTY MOOD JUST KEEPS REPEATING ITSELF. So you must get used to the concept of BOTTLE, in its original medieval sense – A CONTAINER FOR ALL YOUR PETTY MOODS, INDEED AS THE ABILITY TO BOTH SEE AND CONTAIN MULTIPLE MOODS AT THE SAME TIME, without being affected by them, because THAT CONTAINER IS YOUR SPIRIT, and its SIZE AND POWER directly relate to your courage.
Never underestimate this simple lesson to link your SPIRIT as your courage to the ability to overcome your petty FAKE YOU moods in the moment, MANY GIFTED HEDONISTS I HAVE TAUGHT HANG ALL THEIR INITIAL PROGRESS FROM THIS SIMPLE REMINDER – YOUR BOTTLE must be BIGGER THAN THIS LOWER MOOD, SO YOU CAN CONTAIN IT UNTIL IT PASSES = ARISTOS. See, in a very real sense that is what your SPIRIT IS, A CONTAINER FOR THE REST OF YOU, so you need to stop being lost in the current shitty little contents of that Bottle, and BE THE BOTTLE ITSELF, INSTEAD, as then YOU CAN POSSESS YOURSELF, INSTEAD OF BEING POSSESSED BY YOUR MOMENTS.
Please, do yourself a favour, read this over and over until it HITS – IT IS A VERY SIMPLE MEDIEVAL ANALOGY, but you will GET what follows much quicker if you can RELATE, BECAUSE YOU WILL BE ABLE TO SEPARATE YOURSELF MENTALLY FROM YOUR passing MOMENTARY MOOD SWINGS…
YOUR BOTTLE IS YOUR ‘BETTER THAN’, YOUR SPIRIT.
YOUR BOTTLE CAN ‘CONTAIN’ THE FEAR OF YOUR FAKE SELF’, CONTROL IT AND DIRECT IT .
SO TODAY WE NEED TO GET THE FEELING OF YOUR BOTTLE UP TO THE MAGICAL LEVEL OF ‘DIGNITY’.
THEN IT WILL BE MORE ATTRACTIVE TO YOU THAN FAKE YOU’S PETTY MOODS, AS A STABLE PLACE TO LIVE.
THEN YOU CAN CONTROL YOURSELF ALL THE TIME, BECAUSE YOU WILL ‘FEEL’ SELF-POSSESSED, INSTEAD OF EGO-POSSESSED.
THEN YOU WILL BE ARISTOS, AND YOU WILL HAVE SOME ‘VALUE’ TO US.
Yes, no matter how GIFTED YOU ARE, you must CHOOSE to RAISE YOUR LEVEL OF CONSCIOUSNESS, otherwise you will waste the power you need to do it…
Authors note – When I tested this last section on another teacher like me, who has an interest in Western class-based systems, they ‘laughed’, and said ‘so you are teaching people to grow up now?’ To which I replied YES, people are CHILDREN NOW, so they have NO CLASS, they NEVER GROW UP UNLESS THEY ARE FORCED TO – they don’t have the patterns of a GROWN UP, SO THEY WON’T UNDERSTAND UNLESS I TEACH THOSE PATTERNS TO THEM. So understand, every single type of development system is CLASS SYSTEM, but you don’t have those patterns because you are taught equality, so you don’t understand that all CLASS SYSTEMS ARE BASED ON DEVELOPING ‘THE NOBILITY OF CHARACTER’, what being ‘GENTILE’ actually means, but you think being a Gentleman or Gentlewoman means you are RICH and have NICE MANNERS, cause your society states ‘CONSUMER CAPITALISM IS GOD’, and every simple dick head on the planet has life goals that are some version of GET RICH, HAVE FUN, TAKE DRUGS.
Nobility is NOTHING TO DO WITH WEALTH OR EXTERNAL POWER, those are simply the trappings of SUCCESS, it was originally a judgment of your LEVEL. Get it – even the BUDDHA WAS ‘ANCIENT ROYALTY’, so he was taught stuff as a kid that you were not, so you must ‘CHOOSE’ TO BE ‘BETTER THAN’, so you must learn the patterns. See if you were ROYAL they had to teach you to SURVIVE ABOVE ALL ELSE, which means they had to teach you TO STAND AGAINST YOUR FEAR OF DEATH, so you could LEARN TO FIGHT, AND NOT RUN AWAY. All ancient class systems are based on this simple truth, ON FEELING BETTER THAN BECAUSE YOU HAVE BEEN TAUGHT ‘TO STAND AGAINST YOUR FEAR’, otherwise you would not only lose, YOU WOULD NOT LIVE THAT LONG, BECAUSE EVERYBODY WAS A KILLER, AS HAVING THE REPUTATION OF A KILLER KEPT YOU ALIVE – your treasured human rights are a very recent invention..
SO YOU NEED TO GET THAT FAKE YOU, YOUR FAKE CHILD IS YOUR FEAR, YOUR ‘INFERIORITY COMPLEX’ AND EVERYBODY CAN SEE IT, IN ORDER TO ‘START’ THIS PATH, TO HAVE THE ‘REALIZATIONS OF TRUTH’ THAT FOLLOW IT. YES, THE 3 GREATEST REALIZATIONS YOU NEED AT THE BEGINNING, THE ONES THAT ACTUALLY MAKE YOU ‘A SEEKER AFTER TRUTH’, ARE SIMPLY THESE – YOUR SOCIETY HAS FUCKED YOU – YOU WERE NEVER TAUGHT A: TO STAND AGAINST ‘YOUR FEAR’, B: THAT ONLY EFFORTS MADE IN THE MOMENT OF STANDING AGAINST YOUR FEAR ACTUALLY ‘COUNT’ TOWARD YOUR LEVEL, AND C: ONLY THE EFFORTS MADE ON THE OTHER SIDE OF FAILURE, WHEN YOU HAVE EXHAUSTED YOUR MENTAL SELF, MAKE ANY MEANINGFUL DIFFERENCE TO YOUR FELT LEVEL AT THE START, SO YOU MUST TRY, AND THEN RETRY WHEN YOU THINK YOU CAN’T TRY ANYMORE! This is how you GROW UP…
Your SOCIETY has removed all of this from the curriculum, SO YOU JUST THINK THIS IS ‘SUFFERING’ INSTEAD OF LEARNING, so unless you are lucky enough to have learned this yourself or stumbled upon them one day, YOU WILL SIMPLY NOT HAVE THESE PATTERNS, so learn them, NOW, OTHERWISE ALL OF THIS IS JUST ANOTHER ONE OF YOUR LITTLE HOBBIES, AND YOU WILL ONLY EVER THINK ABOUT IT, like a feckless BITCH. Literally speaking, there are GANGSTERS, (in the sense of organized ‘career’ criminals) who have more fucking CLASS THAN YOU DO, because they REJECT YOUR SOCIETIES B/S – they had to learn this stuff to survive, AS THEY CAN NEVER CALL THE POLICE, BECAUSE THE POLICE ARE THE ENEMY. UNDERSTAND – YOU ARE A CHILD, so its time to GROW THE FUCK UP, while you still can – IT IS NOT COOL TO BE A CHILD, NOT FUN TO BE STUPID, NOT HAPPINESS TO BE UNAWARE, those things make you a TWAT…
Get this please – GET SMARTER – no one serious, NO ONE WHO HAS BECOME SELF POSSESSED, gives the smallest fuck what you think AT YOUR LEVEL, YOU ARE A ROBOTIC BABY ANIMAL, your thoughts and actions are little more than BIRD CALLS IN THE JUNGLE, you act out your INFERIORITY COMPLEX every time you get mad, try and be right, chase your BASIC – IT IS ALL TOTALLY FAKE. NO ONE WHO IS SUPERIOR GIVES A FUCK ABOUT WHAT YOU THINK, why would they – where is the value in trying to compete with a mentally ill child, where is the POWER IN THAT VICTORY? You humiliate yourself by even trying to be right, by even trying to be clever while your face and choice of words give away every little thing about you, BECAUSE YOU CANNOT CONTROL YOURSELF. ACTING LIKE A CHILD AS AN ADULT IS THE ULTIMATE HUMILIATION, SEE THIS FOR YOURSELF AND BE MOTIVATED BY IT!
EVERYTHING GETS MUCH EASIER WHEN YOU GET SMARTER…
IN THE BEGINNING OF THIS PATH YOU MUST CHOOSE TO STOP BEING LAZY AND GET SMARTER…
RAISING YOUR LEVEL OF CONSCIOUSNESS SO YOU CAN ‘SEE’ ONLY MAKES SENSE WHEN YOU HAVE GOT SMARTER…
YOU MUST STAND AGAINST YOUR FAKE YOUS ‘FALSE INSTINCTS’ AND ‘URGES’ IN THE MOMENT OF HAVING THEM TO PAY FOR GETTING SMARTER…
SO, TO GET A LOT SMARTER YOU HAVE TO GO ROUND AND ROUND THE SAME POSITIVE FEEDBACK LOOP OF PAYING TO GET SMARTER…
KNOW ON THE 4TH WAY THE ENTIRE FOCUS ON FAKE YOU IS SO YOU CAN ‘EAT’ FAKE YOU AS THE PAYMENT FOR GETTING SMARTER…
THEN YOUR FAKE YOU WILL SLOWLY DISAPPEAR AND REAL YOU CAN APPEAR IN YOUR CONSCIOUSNESS, INSTEAD…
THEN YOU WILL KNOW THAT ALL TRUE HAPPINESS IS THE ‘ACHIEVEMENT OF KNOWING’ IN THE MOMENT OF COGNITION.
YOUR CURRENT HAPPINESS IS SIMPLY THE TEMPORARY RELIEF FROMTHE REDUCTION OF YOUR ANIMAL SUFFERING VIA ‘SELF HARM’.
ANIMAL HAPPINESS IS TEMPORARY, GIFTED HAPPINESS IS PERMANENT – IF YOU GET SMARTER…
BUT ‘OUR’ HAPPINESS REQUIRES YOU TO BE RUTHLESS, TO HAVE THE BOTTLE, AND TO GET SMARTER…
The Way of the Aristocrat REQUIRES you to have the ‘BOTTLE’ TO HOLD YOURSELF AGAINST YOUR MISTAKES, YOUR URGES, YOUR FALSE INSTINCTS, YOUR GOSSIP, YOUR SELF DESTRUCTION. So you must ‘GET A GRIP ON YOURSELF’, create a SELF CONSCIOUS FEELING IN YOURSELF as a ‘SHELL’, that RESISTS all of your AUTOMATIC INSTINCTS AND REACTIONS IN THE MOMENT, and so allows you to see YOUR IMPULSES BEFORE YOU ACT THEM OUT. The only time you currently DO this is OUT OF FEAR, so you are even more unconscious than you normally are, so is useless – YOU MUST CHOOSE TO DO IT, OUT OF STRENGTH, OUT OF AN ABUNDANCE OF ENERGY, like when you were a child…
This GRIP creates RESISTANCE, an air gap inside you THAT ALLOWS YOU TO SELF REFLECT ‘JUST’ BEFORE IMPULSIVE ACTION, and that is what ‘maturity’ is, without IT you are just another wilful child, with no self-reflection forever wondering what the fuck just happened. Be clear, THIS REFLECTION CAN BE ‘FEAR OF FAKE YOU’ DRIVEN AT THE START IN TERMS OF THE ‘TENSION SIGNATURE OF BRAVERY’, that is the easy way to start because it is what you know at an Animal Level, but later it must become the EMOTIONAL FEELING OF ‘BETTER THAN’, so link them together mentally now – IN ALL TRUTH IT IS THE ACTUAL FEELING OF YOUR ‘ALIVENESS’, YOUR ‘PRESENCE’ that we are talking about, but it will be very weak consciously at the start, as you have been ignoring it for decades now…
I know many of you reading already know this, but you would be amazed at just how many GIFTED HEDONISTS, EVEN THE MAJORITY OF THE MOST HIGHLY GIFTED, HAVE NEVER HAD TO LEARN THIS MOST SIMPLE OF ALL THE ASPECTS OF BEING A GROWN UP. Amazing really, so your God help us all if we ever have to go to War again in the West, because you will run away screaming, indeed many of you will simply flee the country in terror, THAT IS HOW LITTLE CLASS YOU CURRENTLY HAVE. So what would ‘YOU’ do eh, when you suddenly need to grow the fuck up and risk your life for the greater good..? Wonder, how far your drug-fueled Badass and little Anti-Hero fantasies would take you then…
SO TAKE A MOMENT NOW AND REMIND YOURSELF TO ‘BE BRAVE’ AS A ‘MENTAL STANCE’ IN SMALL, EVERYDAY STUFF BECAUSE IT FEELS ‘BETTER THAN’ TO FEEL THAT BRAVERY, than to give into FEARS, or FANTASY, or LAZINESS, or STUPID IMPULSES. Remember what you FELT LIKE WHEN YOU ONCE HAD A HIGH VALUATION OF YOURSELF, because you are going to need that feeling for the rest of THIS, YOU ARE GOING TO NEED TO GROW UP and HAVE SOME ‘BOTTLE’. It’s MAYBE A NEW PATTERN FOR YOUR FAKE YOU, but its ONE YOUR REAL YOU ALREADY HAS, so let it ‘show you’, throw yourself into some small, petty little ‘danger’ and see what happens, you may surprise yourself. Some ARISTOS types see this as a new Routine where they SET THEMSELVES into this BRAVE mode for a time, before relaxing back to nothing, but try and remember that this mode needs to become permanent, if you do start with this type of ‘training wheels’ practice.
Frankly, it always amazes me THAT SOME Gifted Hedonists, who have never, ever been taught to be brave are gutless out of laziness in every area of their life EXCEPT one – THEIR BASIC. See, their REAL YOU sees what is happening and steps in to make them HARDER, callous even BY PROVIDING THEM WITH THIS BOTTLE AS A HARD SHELL, so the worst of what they are doing to themselves can bounce off, at least at the time, so their mental health can cope, at least for a while. This can then be re-used for more normal types of performance anxiety, roles they play that are clearly different from normal, but they never MAKE THE JUMP TO USING IT AGAINST THEIR FAKE YOU, because they don’t understand who the enemy actually is, and how to do it – IT IS SIMPLY MAKING ‘THE CHOICE’ TO BE AN ARISTOS, INSTEAD OF A DOMESTICATED ANIMAL, AND THEREFORE THE DESIRE TO NO LONGER PUT UP WITH ‘SHIT YOU’.
Seriously, have you never wondered before why we go on and on about you being ‘gutless’ when none of the other paths mention it – THIS IS THE PATH OF THE ARISTOS BABY, IT IS FOR HEDONISTIC BADASSES like you are supposed to BE, bitch – so LIFT YOUR LEVEL OF CONSCIOUSNESS OUT OF YOUR CREEPY LITTLE ANIMAL LEVEL FOR A MOMENT – ‘REMEMBER’ YOUR SELF, remember who the FUCK YOU ARE without the need to REACT to something – THAT IS YOUR BOTTLE, YOUR PRESENCE, let it HIT, then guard it with your life as it is PRECIOUS, ’cause when it’s GONE, so are you. You need to FEEL LIKE YOUR SKIN IS BURNING, but not the burn of some small ‘Embarrassment’ or ‘Arrogance’, but the BURN of THE OPENNESS OF YOUR ‘BETTER THAN’, of what folks used to describe as a ‘burst of pride’…
If it helps a few of you know that at the beginning to be SELF-POSSESSED just means to be SELF-CONTAINED, to hold yourself ‘in check’, just try not to be too shy about it, you must get on the front foot, and go looking for life as an Aristos, not hide your self way like some petty little Buddhist, content to ‘hide from life’ FOREVER, as your development will regress as soon as you stop hiding. Increasing your ‘Lived Level’ comes from DOING IT as a FORCED CHOICE, the shocks that come around it will just make it easier and quicker – YOU STILL HAVE TO DECIDE TO DO IT UNTIL IT BECOMES NATURAL, A REAL HABIT THAT REPLACE THE FAKE ONES, replaces your FALSE INSTINCTS, your distorted ANIMAL URGES, your twisted SELF SABOTAGE, and your perverted SELF HARM.
This APPROACH is, in all truth, THE TRICK TO THIS – ‘TO GET UP’ FOR IT, TO BE EXCITED BY THIS CHOICE, as often as you can, every damn day, because the more OFTEN you make that EFFORT, then more ENERGY will come from it, and the more excited you will become even about simple stuff, as your FALSE INSTINCT of always choosing laziness fades away. Try and remember now, Real You wants to help you, sends SHAME on FAKE YOU so you can SEE Fake You in the ‘yesterday’, and that’s nice, helpful even to the most highly gifted who can use their shame TO CHANGE, but the rest of you NEED TO GET UP FOR THIS, BECAUSE YOU NEED TO CHOOSE THIS PATH, CONSCIOUSLY, willingly, happily, gladly… AND THAT TAKES ‘BOTTLE’.
DO YOU FEEL LIKE YOU HAVE GOT SMARTER YET?
NO? OK, TRY AND SEE THIS – RELATE TO THIS…
THIS WHOLE LESSON IS ABOUT FINDING AND GETTING YOUR BOTTLE AS A FELT MOOD ‘SHELL’ HIGH ENOUGH TO STAND AGAINST ALL OTHER MOODS.
IN TIME THE FELT SENSE OF YOUR BOTTLE AS A SHELL WILL SURPASS ‘BETTER THAN’ AND BECOME ‘DIGNITY’, WHEN YOU RELAX BACK INTO IT.
THE WAY YOU FIND AND DEVELOP YOUR BOTTLE RELIABLY IS TO ACTIVELY USE IT ‘AGAINST YOUR FAKE YOU’, AS REAL YOU WILL HELP WITH THAT.
TO FEEL YOUR BOTTLE AT AN OVERWHELMING LEVEL ALL THE TIME IS WHAT IT MEANS TO BE ‘PRESENT IN YOUR PRESENCE’.
THEN YOU CAN CHANGE BECAUSE YOU WILL HAVE NO CHOICE BUT TO CHANGE, AND FIND THE ‘REAL PERSONALITY’ OF YOUR GIFT.
SEVERAL OF YOU READING THIS STRONGLY LINK YOUR CURRENT FELT BOTTLE TO YOUR BASIC, indeed you may not even be aware you have any BOTTLE because your BASIC is the only time you ever use it, SO IT IS LOST TO YOU AS A GENERIC SKILL, HIDDEN WITHIN THE ANTICIPATION OF YOUR BASIC. That anticipation perverts your Bottle and steals it from you, just the same as all those dorks who live in fear because they think its ‘lucky’ out of superstition. So LEARN TO SEE THIS AT THE TIME, learn to separate out your BOTTLE from your twisted little shit, so you can use it WHENEVER YOU LIKE, so you can trust it, won’t take long and it will change your life, AS RIGHT NOW EVEN YOU THINK YOU ARE GUTLESS. But your not, are you – when you want to have ‘FUN’ you can do anything, can’t you…
So… YOU MUST SEPARATE THEM BY FEELING THE CORRECT ANTICIPATION OF THE INCREASE IN POWER BY ‘NOT DOING’ YOUR BASIC, MORE THAN THE TRIVIAL THRILL OF ‘DOING IT’ IN ‘THE MOMENT OF DECISION’. LENGTHEN THAN MOMENT OF DECISION TO INCLUDE THE AFTER EFFECTS OF BOTH DOING AND NOT DOING THAT BASIC. SEE THOSE AFTER EFFECTS ARE NOW, IN THE SAME MOMENT OF DECISION, THERE IS NO DIFFERENCE AS THEY WILL NOW HAPPEN, SO YOU MUST BRING THE KNOWN RESULTS OF YOUR SELF-HARM INTO THE CHOICE BY RESISTING THE CHOICE FOR A MOMENT SO YOU CREATE THE OPPORTUNITY TO CHOOSE DIFFERENTLY – IN THIS WAY YOU WILL LEARN TO HABITUALLY REACT WITH SICKNESS, WITH WEAKNESS TO ALL FALSE URGES OF YOUR ‘BASIC INSTINCTS’.
THE TRICK IS TO ‘ANTICIPATE THE POWER’ OF NOT DOING IT MORE THAN THE ‘PETTY THRILL OF THE LOSS OF THAT POWER’, AS IT IS YOUR OVER-SENSITIVITY TO THAT PERVERTED ‘BASIC’ ANTICIPATION THAT IS BEING USED TO GAS-LIGHT YOU. THIS IS HOW ADDICTIVE SELF HARM WORKS, A CHILDISH CON USED ON A CHILD TO DESTROY THEM, A WITCH TRICK, A ‘GLAMOUR’, TO BE BLINDED TO THE TRUTH IN THE MOMENT OF DECISION – SEE THROUGH IT, FOR A COUPLE OF YOU IT WILL BE THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN YOUR POWERFUL LIFE AND YOUR UNHAPPY DEATH. You must peel back the expensive wine label on the BOTTLE ‘CONTAINING’ YOUR BASIC and see that it reads ‘BLEACH’, so you see the thickness of that BLEACH, smell the rot of that BLEACH, EVEN ANTICIPATE THE PUTRID TASTE OF THAT BLEACH, then you will have no problem NOT DRINKING IT IN THE MOMENT. You are the BOTTLE, not the fucking bleach, so pour it down the drain, start again and put something else in that BOTTLE, then you will actually START TO BE BADASS, instead of sadass…
I know IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT, I know you were brought up to be a child, I know that you were NEVER FORCED TO GROW UP, I know you had NO RIGHTS OF PASSAGE YOU HAD TO FACE TO DEVELOP SOME BOTTLE, as of many of us had too culturally or accidentally DO out of pure LUCK, so you have no ability, no pattern habit of standing against FEAR, ALL YOUR CHILDISH SELF DESTRUCTIVE, STUPIDITY, but that DOES NOT MATTER NOW. Some of you have enough BOTTLE TO START NOW, TO WORK WITH NOW YOU KNOW WHAT IT IS, but even if you don’t, even if you are just a ‘candle in the wind’, deluding yourself that your character is some form of perfectly acceptable modern, left-wing intelligentsia, (however you much you may now accept its COMPLETELY FAKE), YOU NOW HAVE ENOUGH PRACTICAL MATERIAL TO LOOK FOR THIS STUFF IN YOURSELF AND START TO ‘PRACTICE HAVING BOTTLE’ – start to develop REAL YOU, BECAUSE Real You LIVES IN YOUR ‘BOTTLE’.
Should you be interested, there is lovely cult song by a lady called Fiona Apple – ‘CONTAINER’, that kinda sums up what Real You feels like at the start, should you be open enough to it and brave enough to let it HIT. So give it a listen, it maybe a little off broadway for you, but it is very HONEST, and we love that here on the Left Hand path, so you might want to try being HONEST with yourself too, WILL HELP SEE THROUGH YOUR SHIT AND CATCH A GLIMPSE OF REAL YOU… This is the version from the TV show, as the video she did is still too dark for you I’d say BUT DON’T RESIST THE ‘SENSE OF OTHERNESS’ IN THIS TRACK, what spiritual types call the ‘Numinous’, as it needs to become both your trusted friend and constant companion…
TRUST ME, WHATEVER YOUR REAL YOU IS, IT WILL BE A SHIT LOAD BETTER THAN THE OBVIOUSLY FAKE, FLAKELY, RATS NEST OF SELF-HARMING CRAP YOU CURRENTLY HAVE – SO START TO LOOK FORWARD TO THAT CHANGE BY ANTICIPATING YOUR NEW YOU. Hopefully you won’t be quite so BORING either, your WOW, your STYLE, your CLASS will lift you out of your ANIMAL FARM, and we can all be ‘impressed’ BY YOU, maybe even have a few ADULT CONVERSATIONS, eh, because you will become the greatest thing any teacher could want – YOU WILL BE INTERESTING…
So please try and get used to this idea, YOU ARE NOT ‘YOU’, you are not your ‘acquired character’ as Daoists say, YOU are YOUR ‘CONGENITAL’ CHARACTER, what you were ‘born with’, you cannot run from it, IT IS YOUR LIFE FORCE ITSELF. All else is a DELUSION, you fool yourself, YOU ARE NOT EVEN AWARE OF JUST HOW BIG A TOOL YOUR FAKE ANTI-YOU IS – YOUR ACTUAL CHARACTER REACHES BACK INTO THE MISTS OF TIME, and what you are now is an ‘ECHO OF THAT ANCESTRAL CHARACTER’, which is your DESTINY. It will be much easier to do all of this if YOU ACCEPT THAT, ACCEPT YOU ARE A BLEND OF YOUR NEEDS OF THE NOW, IN THE STYLE OF YOUR ANCESTORS, as if you go on believing you are FREE to be whoever you wish, or whoever you need to be to survive right now, THEN YOU WILL DAMN YOURSELF TO INCREASING LEVELS OF FAILURE AND UNHAPPINESS.
Hell, maybe take some interest in your ANCESTORS, the ones that made some ‘kind of mark’ on this world, and HOW THEY DID THAT, because that is in you too, so maybe start to take a moment to see if you can ‘feel’ how ‘they would feel’ about what you are doing, instead of just banging out the same habitual patterns of your obviously fake character, that does not even fucking exist. See, folks like you are often AMAZED to see how much of their TRUE nature ‘RUNS IN THE FAMILY’, even if you are not lucky enough to have that said to you at a young age AS A WARNING. In time you may even understand why GIFTED have no choice but to be RUTHLESS.
So… any FAMOUS folks in your bloodline, any WARRIORS, any PRIESTS, any CRIMINALS, any KILLERS, any LEADERS, any LOVERS, any PERFORMERS, any SINGERS, any ARTISTS, any TEACHERS, any WITCHES, any INVENTORS, any TYRANTS, any mad patterns of behavior that don’t fit any modern type…? IS THERE ANYONE WHO CLEARLY HAD TO DESTROY THEIR ‘FEAR’ TO DO WHAT THEY DID, SO THEY ‘RATED A MENTION’? Ahhh, you have no idea? So spend some time ASKING ABOUT THEM THEN, see if all you petty ‘foibles’, that don’t come from your childhood, come from somewhere else, instead – THE MORE YOU SHOW AN INTEREST IN THIS, THE MORE REAL YOU WILL HELP YOU FIND IT IN YOURSELF. And it works fast…
If all this sounds a bit weird to you know this simply – SCIENCE AND SPIRITUALITY HAVE BEEN QUIETLY COALESING FOR THE LAST 100 YEARS. Science now accepts that more than 95% of the stuff in the universe is invisible to Mankind, that this invisible stuff, Dark Energy and Dark Matter, causes all the other stuff to exist, and that this means we have at least 1 more physical dimension we cannot see normally. It accepts that both Time and Gravity are not what we think they are, eg their reality is not objective to us, and what they actually are is NOT what we model them as, to our ability to measure it. See this other stuff is where what they call your ASTRAL BODY LIVES, your ESSENCE, what the world calls your SPIRIT, along with the ESSENCE of ‘everything else’, because YOU ARE GIFTED, so you were born with the seed of the Astral body of your Ancestors, most folks don’t have one, which is why some 4th wayers call them the DEAD. Therefore YOU are FAR more Emotional than most people, as your Astral Body is made of Emotion, because it is connected to what they call your Higher Emotional Centre, your Conscience, which is why you have one, but you MUST GROW THAT ASTRAL BODY VIA SELF CONSCIOUS ATTENTION ‘ON IT’, BEFORE IT IS ‘USEFUL’. Be happy, most folks don’t have any of this, so they remain domesticated animals, little more than Organic Robots, going through the motions of Reacting to what happens like a meat puppet, no better than rocks, and they can’t be helped.
Yes, you live in a SHADOW WORLD, THE SHADOWS OF THINGS YOU CAN’T SEE, BUT THEY ARE THERE ALL THE SAME. But that is cool, just as long as you are NOT SO FUCKING STUPID that you believe that right now, YOU are literally looking through the ‘windows of your eyes’ and seeing light bounce off reality AS IT IS, you know that you are looking a personal hallucination, a model based on YOUR THOUGHTS ABOUT REALITY, a heavily processed, historically weighted, visually corrected FRAMEWORK that is CREATED BY YOU IN YOUR MIND based on the stored representations of your very limited senses, and does not actually exist – YOU KNOW YOU ARE LOOKING AT ‘THOUGHTS’ IN RETROSPECT, you are not seeing the LIGHT REFLECTED OFF THINGS, SO YOU ARE NOT SEEING WHAT ELSE IS ACTUALLY THERE, RIGHT? You don’t see the Essence of things, what exists in another dimension of reality that you have been trained NOT TO SEE, much as it is the same reality, happening at the same time, in the same way, but YOU SEE THE DUST AND OTHER CONCRETIONS OF YOUR MIND, because everything you see is A THOUGHT ABOUT REALITY, not reality itself, WHICH IS THE SAME, BUT DIFFERENT, BECAUSE ITS REAL, AND NOT A PERSONAL HALLUCINATION…
Yep, everything is WEIRD, BECUASE YOU ARE ANT STUCK IN A WORLD OF ‘N’ DIMENSIONS, WHERE REALITY IS MAINLY BASED IN THE N+1,2,3… DIMENSIONS YOU CAN’T SEE, YET, and in the next 100 years its going to get a lot weirder – the staff at the nuclear accelerator in CERN report the presence of Spectral Entities during tests so bloody often now that no one even bothers with it. There is an explosion of unexplained phenomenon being observed in the sky ALL OVER THE WORLD, EVERYDAY, RIGHT NOW, as there has always been in times of WAR on this planet, in records going back thousands of years. And that is not even 10% of it, SO STOP BEING A SELF IMPORTANT CHILD AND START TO LEARN SOMETHING EH, STUFF THAT IS GOING TO COME IN REAL USEFUL IN YOUR LITTLE LIFE, even if you don’t develop your GIFT.
Best accept it, THE MESSAGE THAT IT WRITTEN THROUGH ALL OF THIS BLOG – YOU DON’T KNOW SHIT, DO YOU, EVEN COMPARED TO WHAT A LOT OF ‘OTHER PEOPLE’ DO KNOW, BUT YOU COULD DO… Don’t worry, however big a small child you are, however much you thought you could wander through this life in ‘playschool mode’, ‘stoned mode’, ‘fool mode’, YOU AT LEAST NOW KNOW WHAT BOTTLE IS, YOU KNOW THERE ACTUALLY IS A ‘GROWN UP MODE’. Yes? you know BEING A GROWN UP IS COOL, AND BEING A CHILD AS AN ADULT IS ABOUT BEING A TWATTY, SELF DESTRUCTIVE MESS, THAT DISHONORS YOU EVERY SINGLE SECOND YOU GO ON WITH IT, BEFORE YOUR MENTAL HEALTH DETERIORATES TO THE VICTIMHOOD OF SELF OBESSESSED ‘POND LIFE’?
So maybe practice SETTING YOURSELF IN ‘BOTTLE MODE ‘INSTEAD, so you will be able to start to develop, eh – YOU DO STILL HAVE SOME BOTTLE OUTSIDE OF YOUR BASIC, RIGHT, YOU HAVE ALREADY TRIED TO SEPARATE THE 2 AS SENSATIONS, and FELT WHAT IT IS BEFORE FAKE YOU PERVERTED IT? YOU UNDERSTAND THE BOTTLE YOU USE AGAINST EXTERNAL CHALLENGES AND FEARS, TO HOLD YOURSELF AGAINST THOSE FEARS SO YOU CAN ACT AGAINST THEM, IS EXACTLY THE SAME THING YOU USE TO HOLD YOURSELF AGAINST ALL YOUR INTERNAL CHALLENGES TO YOUR AUTHORITY, INDEED THOSE 2 ARE PART OF THE EXACT SAME THING? SO YOU UNDERSTAND THAT YOU MUST CONTINUE TO HOLD YOURSELF AGAINST YOUR FEAR/DESIRE/BOREDOM ‘FAKE YOU’ MIND-SET UNTIL YOU WEAKEN IT, AND REAL YOU GETS MUCH STRONGER, THAT IS HOW ‘YOU PAY’ TO GET STRONGER, BY WINNING THOSE BATTLES?
AWESOME, SO YOU JUST GOT A LOT SMARTER THEN, DID YOU NOT.. SEE YOU HAVE JUST LEARNT HOW TO ‘EAT’ FAKE YOU, but don’t sweat it, that EVIL BITCH has it coming, and once YOU bury her you will understand what it is to be ALIVE, all the time, so you will cheerfully DANCE ON HER GRAVE. Ohhhh, the shame of being NOTHING all these LONG years, OF GOING ALONG TO GET ALONG LIKE A PUSSY, when you could of GROWN UP AT ANY TIME YOU WISHED…
Anyway, its all good, I KNOW YOU HAVE ‘THE NERVE’ NOW, question is, can you ‘HOLD YOUR NERVE’ without tensing against those NERVES, or run away sobbing like total fucking tool, cause you won’t commit to YOURSELF, the source of all your ‘reality’. See, YES – it’s ALL A GAME, AND ONE YOU HAVE LOST THUS FAR, YOU HAVE HUMILIATED YOURSELF, SO as all good gangsters know, it is far better to KILL (metaphorically) OTHER PEOPLE than kill yourself, and all this DEVELOPMENT STUFF ONLY REALLY STARTS WHEN YOU stop killing yourself, WHEN YOU SEE THAT IS WHAT YOUR OLD LIFE CONSISTS OF.
Good luck with that, AS I SUSPECT IT MAYBE THE KEY TO ALL OF THIS, FOR YOU, when you understand what RUTHLESS IS, and why you ARE NOT RUTHLESS, why you are total fucking pussy, BECAUSE YOU ‘BELIEVE THEM’, even when you know they lie to you. YOU HAVE NEVER LEARNT TO PLAY THEM, LIKE AN ARISTOS, TO LEAVE THEM THEIR FUNNY LITTLE DELUSIONS and get on with your own shit, BECAUSE WHAT THEY CRAVE IS YOUR ATTENTION, GOOD OR BAD, which means they ARE BENEATH YOU…
So, ask yourself the question NOW – ARE ‘THEY’ MORE IMPORTANT THAN ‘YOU’, IN YOUR LIFE, IN YOUR REALITY, IN YOUR FRAME OF REFERENCE, RIGHT NOW, because you need the correct answer to this question to GO ON AND GROW INTO YOURSELF now. See, when you stop being a child you will find YOUR SURROUNDED BY IGNORANT CHILDREN WHO ARE DRAINING YOU, so you will need to manage that, and start adding some folks who build you up…
ARE YOU MORE IMPORTANT THAN THEM, OR ARE YOU NOTHING AT ALL?
GREAT, SO YOU HAVE SOME SELF-BELIEF, BUT I HAVE TO ASK – WHY THE FUCK TO YOU BOTHER WITH ‘THEM’ THEN, WHY ‘CARE’, WHY BE ANNOYED, WHY EVEN FUCKING NOTICE..?
SEE YOU NOW NEED TO LEARN HOW TO KEEP ‘YOUR ENERGY FOR YOURSELF’, YOU NEED TO BE RUTHLESS AND PUT SOME DISTANCE BETWEEN YOURSELF AND YOUR PARASITES…
THE SUBJECT OF MANAGING YOUR ENERGETIC CONNECTIONS IS FOR NEXT TIME, BUT MOST OF YOU WILL KNOW AFTER TODAY WHO YOU NEED MORE OF, AND WHO HAS TO GO.
SO ASK YOURSELF THE QUESTION AGAIN – WHO IS MORE IMPORTANT ‘TO FAKE YOU’ THAN ‘YOU’…
GIFTED HEDONISTS ATTRACT PARASITES, often by their BASIC, but even the lower level relationships tend to be parasitic – so try and feel the quality of the relationships that BUILD YOU, rather than BLEED YOU, going forward. Try and see beyond your FAKE PATTERNS and feel who you find ‘INTERESTING’, AS A ‘SENSE OF CONNECTION’, FOR NO BENEFIT TO YOURSELF, THAT YOU HAVE NO STABLE RELATIONSHIP WITH, rather than a source of annoyance, A SOURCE OF TENSION, however much they DO FOR YOU, however much FUN you think they are, AS you actually LOATHE THEM AS PEOPLE, because they are BENEATH YOU, in terms of their level.
See, those relationships COST YOU YOURSELF, every single time, NO MATTER HOW NICE TO YOU THAT YOU THINK THEY ARE. Pay particular attention to the ‘creepy ones’, WHO SPEND THEIR WHOLE LIVES in some form of nervous EMBARRASSMENT or DRAMA, even QUIET DESPERATION, as they are the worst – THEY ARE USING YOU TO ‘KEEP IT TOGETHER’, burn them. See there is a time coming when you will start SEE THE NEED FOR THE MANNERISMS OF THE ARISTOS, as pretty much all of your normal life is designed to be A BUZZ KILL, DESIGNED TO MAKE YOU ‘LOSE YOUR NERVE’, YOUR SENSE OF ‘BETTER THAN’ AS A FEELING, as its designed to BLEED YOU, so you will need to know HOW TO DEAL WITH THAT whilst still being able to maintain yourself in this world. So DO TRY and remind yourself – the history of this world is written by RUTHLESS PEOPLE, because they tend to be the last ones standing at the end, AND ITS ONLY THE END THAT REALLY MATTERS AT ALL.
NOTHING YOU HAVE DONE THUS FAR REALLY RATES A MENTION, DOES IT, BECAUSE YOU ARE A SLAVE, but it could do, WHEN YOU STOP BEING A SLAVE, when you understand what you are ‘aiming’ for, as after TODAY YOU WILL FINALLY HAVE AN AIMING ‘POINT’, WHICH IS TO FIND THE TRUTH OF ‘YOUR POINT’, or better said to let REAL YOU ‘show you’ the POINT OF YOU. But to get there you will need to FINALLY UNDERSTAND YOU CANNOT GO THROUGH THIS LIFE HUMMING ‘Killing me Softly’ like its a good thing, you must understand the NEED FOR A PERSONAL MORALITY of what is GOOD FOR YOU. Then the world will start to ‘GO YOUR WAY’, with out you having to do very much at all, as you will of ACCEPTED YOUR GIFTED DESTINY, because you have realized ‘your’ destiny is not to be a ‘slave’, anymore, SO YOU WILL WANT TO HAVE A ‘GO AT LIFE’, and turn some of your current fantasies into YOUR REALITY.
WHEN YOUR LIFE GETS EASIER IT IS ONLY BECAUSE YOU HAVE GOT STRONGER.
WHEN YOU LIFE GETS HARDER IT IS ONLY BECAUSE YOU HAVE GOT WEAKER.
I HAVE JUST TAUGHT YOU HOW TO FIND THE BOTTLE YOU WERE BORN WITH AND USE IT UNDER CONSCIOUS DIRECTION AND GET STRONGER!
SO KNOW, RIGHT NOW IT IS NOT JUST THAT YOU ARE A WEAK, GUTLESS THING, IT IS NOT JUST THAT THE BLOODY ANIMALS ARE SCARIER THAN YOU, IT IS NOT EVEN THAT I AM ‘DEATH ON 2 LEGS’ IN YOUR EYES, IT IS THAT I HAVE SMALL, FLUFFY WHITE PETS THAT ‘DISPLAY’ MORE BOTTLE THAN YOU DO…
YOU MUST FIX THAT NOW – TO STUMBLE THROUGH LIFE AS A PEOPLE PLEASER WHEN YOU WERE BORN A BADASS IS BENEATH YOU, MY DEAR…
YES, YOU DON’T HAVE TO BE A GANGSTER ON THE LEFTHAND PATH, BUT IF YOU WANT TO BE ARISTOS AND ENJOY THE ‘COMFORTS OF ELITISM’, OF SUPERIORITY RATHER THAN RELIGION, YOU NEED TO UNDERSTAND WHAT A BADASS ACTUALLY IS, BY BEING ONE.
AND THE FIRST PLACE YOU START THAT IN THIS WORLD IS YOUR REPUTATION, BECAUSE YOU REPUTATION IS VERY GOOD EARLY JUDGEMENT OF WHERE YOU ARE WITH ACTUALLY DOING THIS STUFF – NO, IT DOES NOT MATTER IN ITSELF, BUT IT IS AN EXCELLENT ‘MARKER FOR CHANGE’.
SO CONSIDER NOW AT THE END OF THIS PREFACE – WHAT DON’T YOU LIKE ABOUT THE WAY PEOPLE TREAT YOU?
OUCH… SO TIME TO GET A LITTLE ‘RUTHLESS’ THEN, AS YOU ‘THE INDIVIDUAL’ DOESN’T REALLY NEED PEOPLE, THOSE PEOPLE NEED YOU…
WANT A CLUE – MAKE THIS CHANGE IN YOUR CLOSEST RELATIONSHIPS FIRST, THE DAILY ONES, AS IT WORKS QUICKER, THEN ROLL IT OUT TO ALL THE TWATS YOU HAVE ALWAYS HATED ANYWAY, WHEN YOU HAVE THE PATTERN ‘DOWN PAT’, AS A REWARD TO YOURSELF FOR ‘TRYING’…
YES, YOU NEED TO LEARN ‘HOW TO BE RUTHLESS’, SO PRACTICE ON YOURSELF AND THOSE CLOSEST TO YOU FIRST, REMEMBERING THE CLASSIC ARISTOS ADAGE – OVERT FAMILIARITY WITH YOUR LESSERS ALWAYS BREEDS THEIR CONTEMPT BECAUSE YOU MAKE THEM FEEL INFERIOR, ESPIECALLY WHEN YOU PLEASE THEM, SO THEY WILL CONSTANTLY TRY AND HUMILIATE YOU, BECAUSE THEY ARE HARMLESS LITTLE ANIMALS, BUT YOU ARE NOT…
AND JUST TO BE SURE, YOU UNDERSTAND BEING RUTHLESS ALWAYS STARTS WITH NOT PUTTING UP WITH BEING TREATED BADLY FOR AN EASY LIFE, IT MEANS YOU CHANGE THAT EVEN IF YOU THINK IT COSTS YOU, EVEN IF YOU HAVE GONE ALONG WITH IT FOR YEARS AND WILLINGLY AGREED TO IT, EVEN IF YOU THINK YOU GET THE BETTER DEAL, EVEN IF YOU THINK IT IS A ‘BASIC ‘SUPERPOWER, BECAUSE NONE OF THAT IS TRUE – YOU ACTUALLY ARE THE FOOL THAT THEY ALREADY THINK YOU ARE, HENCE WHY THEY TREAT YOU THIS WAY. So you CHANGE THE WAY THEY TREAT YOU, feel that FOOLISHNESS BURN, BY FACING IT, ACCEPTING WHAT YOU HAVE DONE AS ‘NOT REAL YOU’, AND CHANGING – THAT IS WHAT ‘FACING IT’ MEANS…
The KEY to speeding this change up is to make them WARY OF YOU, by being unpredictable WITHOUT ANY EXPLANATION, so learn how NOT to argue, simply withdraw your PRESENCE from them POLITELY, and DO SOMETHING ELSE, BECAUSE YOU HAVE LOST INTEREST IN THEM AT THAT TIME. In this way you learn how to control the QUALITY OF CONNECTION YOU HAVE, to CHOKE IT, and stop being ridiculously generous with something so fucking precious TO YOU – learn that they need to PLEASE YOU to even bother with them, and feel your BETTER THAN in that moment. These are your actual Superpowers, THE COMFORTS OF ELITISM, they are part of BEING GIFTED YOU SHOULD OF BEEN TAUGHT AS A KID, but you have let Fake You twist them into something else, often to pervert your GIFT into your BASIC, SOMETHING THAT COSTS YOU YOUR FUTURE, UNLESS YOU FIX IT.
YOU DON’T NEED TO PAY FOR WHAT YOU ALREADY HAVE, SO LEARN HOW TO MAKE THE IMPORTANT THINGS OF OTHERS TOTALLY UNIMPORTANT TO YOU BY ‘FORGETTING THEM’ without explanation or care – BE RUTHLESS THE EASY WAY. At the start you will see just WHO IS THE MOST DESPERATE TO TAKE YOU DOWN A ‘PEG OR 2’, as your ongoing ‘humiliation’ is so important to them that they struggle to function without it, so use that realization to snuff them out quickly – THEY ARE PARASITES, THE VERY BOTTOM OF THE FOOD CHAIN, WHY CARE. You are NOT OBLIGATED TO ANYONE OR ANYTHING UNLESS IT IS ACTUALLY ‘BETTER THAN’ YOU, as then it helps you just to be ‘near it’, but remember not to FEUD WITH PEOPLE, DON’T HATE THEM OR MAKE THEM ENEMIES, AS THAT WILL COST YOU JUST THE SAME, you must CUT THEM OFF, show them how desperate they are, WHILE YOU HAVE SIMPLY ‘LOST INTEREST’ AND NO LONGER REMEMBER WHAT THE FUCK THEY ARE ON ABOUT – THEY DON’T MATTER, IT IS YOU WHO ARE MAKING THEM MATTER!
NEVER FEEL BAD ABOUT BEING RUTHLESS, IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT, HOWEVER BIGGER FOOL YOU HAVE BEEN ALL THESE YEARS, simply see it as the beginning of A ‘BETTER THAN’ REPUTATION, Better Than before = YOU ARE ARISTOS, WHICH MEANS YOU ARE NOT SOMEONES ‘PET’, so you are polite, not stupid. Try and start to see these things ENERGETICALLY, PRACTICALLY, try and see how much better your life is when you KEEP YOUR ENERGY FOR YOURSELF, but you must find YOUR WAY OF DOING THAT – THE WAY REAL YOU WANTS YOU TO DO THAT BECAUSE YOUR REAL YOU HAS THE PATTERNS TO HELP YOU DO IT THEIR WAY…
So I’ll leave you with this – I once taught this lesson to an awesome, mixed culture lady who was sadly a poster girl for the Lost Soul generation, she only got ‘results’ practically, after a lot of trouble with her reputation, when she realized she NEEDED TO STOP SMILING ‘VUNERABLY’ and TALK WAY LESS NERVOUS ‘BOLLOCKS’. But it was much more than this, see MUCH later on, she ‘confessed’ that one day she was trying to get her feral tom cat Mickey to move off the couch so she could sit down, but he scratched her viciously then went straight back to sleep, and IT HIT HER in THAT SAME MOMENT SHE NEEDED TO BE ‘MORE CAT’ AND ‘LESS DOG’. She UNDERSTOOD in that moment she had spent her whole life thus far ACTING LIKE HER MOTHERS TREASURED GOLDEN RETRIEVER ‘OSCAR’, who was super loyal and obedient so received the majority of her mother’s love, and that had TOTALLY FUCKED HER LIFE UP. In her paraphrased words, ‘in a second a veil was lifted from my eyes, and I remembered who the fuck I was, because I understood WHAT I WAS, BY UNDERSTANDING WHAT I WAS NOT…’.
SO WHAT DO YOU DO NOW THAT YOU ‘ARE NOT’?
WHAT DO YOU SAY, THINK, ACT OUT, RUN TOWARD, RUN AWAY FROM, IMAGINE, FANTASIZE, FEAR, DESIRE, THAT YOU ‘ARE NOT’?
Yes, I wonder what will make that happen for you… but don’t worry, whatever it is, however long it takes will still be the EASIEST WAY TO FIND OUT for YOU, just try and get a bit smarter in the meantime, eh, AS THAT PROCESS IS WHAT REAL YOU WILL USE TO SHOW ‘YOU’ TO YOURSELF. See, whatever it is, it will be A GROWN UP, THAT KNOWS HOW TO BRACE ITSELF AGAINST FAKE YOU, AGAINST CHALLENGE ‘PROACTIVELY’, WHEN THERE IS NO NEED TO, SO IS ALWAYS ON THE ‘FRONT FOOT’, LOOKING FOR THE SHIT, rather than creeping around at the back, hiding, hoping not to be seen, waiting to have to react, waiting to fail, waiting to be wrong, waiting to be tired, scared and bored, ‘WHILST YOUR LIFE GOES ON WITHOUT YOU’. And how shit is that.
SO TAKE A LOOK AT THE FEATURE IMAGE OF THIS POST, and see something of yourself in it, before pondering for a moment, in a hand-to-hand fight, that beautiful creature would rip your throat out inside 3 seconds with no hesitation whatsoever, however much you cried out for help, however fast you tried to ‘hide’, ‘run away’, or ‘please it’. See your ONLY CHANCE is to stand still and then step ‘toward it’, as it would be forced to consider that you might just be DANGEROUS, indeed you may have something sharp enough and long enough to stab it in the face, TO GO FOR ITS EYES, and all cats hate that, SO usually run. But then again, THAT SHIT WOULD TAKE SOME SERIOUS ‘BOTTLE’, don’t you think, so YOUR GOD HELP YOU IF YOU NEVER BOTHERED TO DEVELOP ANY OF THAT PRECIOUS QUALITY, as they won’t even find enough bits left of your corpse to bury, BECAUSE SHE, AND ALL THE OTHER VULTURES, WILL EAT YOU ALIVE.
TO LIVE THE GIFTED LIFE TAKES ‘BOTTLE’.
YOU WERE BORN WITH THIS BOTTLE BECAUSE YOU ARE SPIRITED – YOU DON’T NEED THE HOLY SPIRIT OF SOME GOD TO ‘FALL FROM ABOVE LIKE A DOVE’, YOU HAVE YOUR OWN, IT IS CONGENTIAL, IT IS WHAT YOU ARE ‘MADE OF’, IT IS NOT FAKE YOU.
SO EXTRACT YOUR BOTTLE FROM YOUR BASIC AND START USING IT TO GET SMARTER.
SEE, YOU GET SMARTER WHEN YOU LEARN HOW TO ‘BRACE YOURSELF’ OUT OF SUPERIORITY ALL THE TIME, PROACTIVELY, NOT OUT OF FEAR/DESIRE AS A REACTION – THIS IS THE ONLY TIME WHEN YOU ARE TRULY ALIVE, WHEN YOU ‘LIVE IN YOUR SPIRIT’.
THEN YOU WILL START TO GET AN AWFUL LOT BETTER AT YOUR LIFE, AND ALL OF THIS ARISTOS STUFF WILL START TO COME NATURALLY, A LONG WITH MUCH, MUCH MORE BESIDES, GIVEN FROM REAL YOU, YOUR SPIRIT.
SO TODAY YOU ARE GOING TO LEARN TO USE THE ENERGY YOU ARE SAVING TO ‘GET UP’ FOR PROACTIVELY ‘BRACING YOURSELF’, SO YOU CAN START TO LIVE A LITTLE MORE OUTSIDE OF YOUR BASIC, TO LIVE IN SPIRIT WHENEVER YOU WISH…
THE KEY MILESTONE IS WHEN ‘YOU WANT TO LIVE IN SPIRIT’ AS A COMFORT, ALL THE TIME, BECAUSE YOU WILL FEEL SELF-CONSCIOUS OUT OF ‘SUPERIORITY’, ‘BETTER THAN’ LIKE A DRUG, RATHER THAN THE NERVOUS EMBARRASSMENT OF ‘INFERIORITY’, LIKE ‘A SLAVE’ AS A REACTION TO CIRCUMSTANCE – YOU WILL HAVE SOME POWER OVER YOUR FAKE SELF.
YES, YOU MUST LEARN TO DO IT ‘RIGHT’, YOU MUST CHANGE HOW YOU DO IT TO STOP FAKE YOU STEALING IT FROM YOU, AS THEN YOU UNDERSTAND ANOTHER KEY ARISTOS CONCEPT – RESPECT – BECAUSE YOU WILL UNDERSTAND ‘SELF-RESPECT’.
YOU MUST UNDERSTAND WHY ‘RESPECTING YOUR OWN KIND’, YOUR EQUALS AND YOUR BETTERS IS USED IN ALL DEVELOPMENT SYSTEMS AS YOU ARE RESPECTING YOURSELF THIS WAY, AS A ‘POSITIVE SELF CONSCIOUS ATTENTION’, VIA YOUR ‘ACTIVE’ BOTTLE.
JUST SO YOU KNOW, FOR THE REST OF THIS POST, WHAT YOU CALL ‘BOTTLE’, WE CALL ‘PRESENCE’.
Do you GET IT yet, do you have enough material to see this in YOURSELF YET?
For example do you see how fine the line is between ALL POWERFUL SPIRITUAL ROYALTY, and the SELF-DESTRUCTIVE, degenerate ANIMAL TRASH that is your HEDONISTIC SLAVE, YOUR FAKE ANTI-HERO? Do you think you have enough practical advice that you can START DOING THIS STUFF NOW, START TO CHANGE, start to EXPLORE THE UNDISCOVERED COUNTRY OF YOU, start to use your ‘Rod’ and your ‘Staff’ to COMFORT YOURSELF ‘EMOTIONALLY’? Do you see how we ARE NOT RELIGIOUS, but we use the exact same mechanisms TO ‘BELEIVE IN OURSELVES’, not some stereotypical Mesopotamian God, because we don’t actually NEED THAT GOD, WE NEED ‘OUR GOD’ TO HELP US? That we must DEFER TO, LEARN FROM and RESPECT OUR GOD, because it is WHAT WE ARE, indeed is what every single MONOTHEISTIC religion on that planet actually started out as, THE WORSHIP OF YOUR GOD, THE SPIRITUAL FARTHER AND MOTHER OF YOU, so you understand all Spiritual relationships are based on the ‘Familial Responsibility’ that we feel for all GIFTED..?
Hope so, ‘CAUSE TODAY YOU NEED TO SEE THAT TO ‘GET SMARTER’ YOU NEED TO ‘GET PRACTICAL’, YOU NEED TO ‘DO’, so YOU NEED TO ‘GET UP’ FOR THIS. So lets start USING ALL THIS to get you out of your moments shall we, LET’S START TO BREAK YOUR ANIMAL STATE OF IDENTIFICATION, YOUR STATE OF ATTACHMENT TO YOUR TRIVIAL LITTLE MOMENTS. Then we can get you out of your ANIMAL CLASS SYSTEM, your GOAL OF WEALTH ABOVE ALL, where you whole positive or negative ‘sense of yourself’ is based on having ‘slightly’ more (of some meaningless thing) than those you compare yourself to, or having some imaginary POWER OVER OTHER, some ‘secrets’, some ‘influence’, so you can learn what REAL ‘BETTER THAN’ IS, and stop using your FAKE SHIT to get by.
THERE IS ONLY ONE TRUE CLASS SYSTEM IN THIS WORLD, ALWAYS HAS BEEN, ALWAYS WILL BE – YOUR LEVEL OF CONSCIOUSNESS.
TODAY YOU MUST START TO EVOLVE YOUR LEVEL OF CONSCIOUSNESS, SO YOU CAN STOP BEING DEGENERATE, STOP DEVOLVING YOUR LEVEL.
IF YOU DON’T START DOING THIS YOU WILL CONTINUE TO DEGENERATE, YOUR EPISODES OF MADDNESS WILL BECOME LONGER AND MORE PERMANENT.
SEE… WE ARE TRYING TO MAKE YOU ELITIST IN ORDER TO ‘SAVE YOU’, THAT IS WHAT ‘SUPER HUMAN’ SCHOOL IS, BITCH.
Who knew eh? Yep, Spirituality always comes back to one simple point, WHAT ALL TEACHERS ARE ABOUT – you must EVOLVE OR GO MAD, you cannot stay the same, as NOTHING ON THIS PLANET EVER STAYS THE SAME, EVERYTHING CHANGES to ‘BETTER THAN’, OR ‘WORSE THAN’. So best pick a side eh, tempus fugit… MAY YOUR REAL YOU GRANT YOU GOOD LUCK IN YOUR JOURNEY, ‘CAUSE YOU ARE GOING TO NEED IT – TODAY THE GLOVES COME OFF, TODAY ITS US AND THEM, and you don’t wanna be them, BECAUSE THEY NOT ONLY HATE THEMSELVES, THEY HATE YOU AS WELL. When you understand ‘Animal Nature’ in this world, when you understand it is ‘RED IN TOOTH AND CLAW’ at its core, YOU WILL NEVER, EVER GO BACK TO IT, because you will KNOW WHAT LIVING AT THE CONSCIOUS LEVEL OF AN ‘INSECT’ REALLY MEANS – YOU DON’T EXIST, YOU ARE YOUR CHOSEN ‘HERD’.
So here is your first TEST – look into the mirror now, and GIVE UP THE VALUES OF YOUR HERD, YOU DOMINANT VALUE SET, YOUR IDENTITY, AND ‘DENY THEM’, THEN RESTATE YOUR ‘SENSE OF IDENTIFICATION’ AS ‘GIFTED’. You may not consciously know your DOMINANT IDENTITY as you are still very stupid, but it is easy to find, IT IS WHAT YOU DEFEND THE MOST, EVEN WHEN IT IS WRONG, BAD, ANTI ‘PC’, OF NO VALUE TO YOUR LIFE, so IT RISKS YOUR FUTURE TO DEFEND – it is what you are ‘led around by the nose’ by, SO IT IS your BIGGEST SINGLE FORM OF ANIMAL CONTROL. Be clear NOW – your RELIGION IS GIFTED, your ANCESTRY IS GIFTED, your NATIONALITY IS GIFTED, your football team is GIFTED, your cause is THE DEVELOPMENT OF THE GIFTED. You are NOT MODERN, MODERN IS DEGENERATE, MODERN CHANGES EVERY FUCKING DAY, MODERN IS FICKLE AND CONSUMER CAPITALIST, MODERN IS GREEDY AND LAZY AND BANAL – YOU ARE ANCIENT BECAUSE YOUR GOAL IN ALL THINGS IS QUALITY, the goal of ROYALTY, WHICH IS PERMANENT…
How easy or hard you find that to be will tell you HOW FAR DOWN THE ANIMAL FOOD CHAIN YOU ARE, as even the best of the animals change sides all the time, AND THE UNSCHOOLED HIGHLY GIFTED DO THIS NATURALLY, EVEN MAKE A POINT OF HAVING FEW VALUES OUTSIDE OF THEIR HEDONISM, BECAUSE THEIR REAL YOU KNOWS ALL THE NORMAL ONES ARE TOTAL CRAP, A TRICK FOR FOOLS, THAT HAVE NO REALITY IN THEMSELVES. The awful 4th Way phrase, so popular in the Enlightenment, is that you are A ‘CITIZEN OF THE WORLD’, but what it actually means is you are ‘better than’ an animal, YOU CHOOSE THE PATH OF THE INDIVIDUAL, THE INDIVIDUAL THAT IS ‘REAL YOU’. Your HERD is a form of social control, WITHOUT WHICH YOU WOULD ALL KILL EACH OTHER FOR A CHUNK OF BREAD, IF YOU WERE HUNGRY ENOUGH…
Most IMPORTANTLY, STOP DELUDING YOURSELF IF YOU HAVE THE MODERN WESTERN, LIBERAL, WOKE MINDSET that you are already ABOVE THAT – This modern crap IS THE VERY WORST HERD TO BELONG TO BECAUSE IT ‘THE HIDEOUT’ OF THE ‘GUTLESS’, for the weak and stupid who go along WITH THE EASIEST AND MOST SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE OPTION… That’s not you is it, YOU ARE NOT A TOTAL PUSSY, ARE YOU, with NO ‘BOTTLE’ WHATSOEVER..?
So know if you choose to live in this herd, the evolving crock of shit that is THE LEFT WING VIOLENCE OF CANCEL CULTURE, THE GREATEST CURRENT THREAT TO THIS WORLD, YOU WILL NEVER DEVELOP YOURSELF UNDER ANY SYSTEM, because you are DELUSIONAL, AS A ‘WAY OF LIFE’. See YOU THINK WHAT THEY TELL YOU TO THINK, DON’T YOU, YOU ARE JUST A COLLECTION OF OTHER PEOPLES OPINIONS – SO STOP READING NOW, YOU SILLY LITTLE DORK – THERE IS A TIME COMING IN THIS WORLD WHERE YOU MAY NEED TO FIGHT WITH WEAPONS AND KILL PEOPLE WHO ARE TRYING TO KILL YOU JUST TO KEEP YOUR WAY OF LIFE, YOUR RELATIVE FREEDOM, AND YOUR CANCEL CULTURE WILL BE FUCK ALL USE TO YOU THEN…
So to sum it all up VERY SIMPLY:
YOU CANNOT BE A PUSSY ON THE LEFT-HAND PATH.
YOU MUST HAVE THE ACCESS AND THE ENERGY TO USE YOUR BOTTLE, YOUR ‘PRESENCE’ TO DEVELOP.
IF YOU DON’T YOU MUST CHOOSE A ‘SLAVE RELIGION’, A PATH FOR THE WEAK, AS THAT IS WHAT THEY ARE DESIGNED FOR, THEY ARE A ‘FAN CLUB’.
SEE THE 3 ABRAHAMIC RELIGIONS ‘NEED’ YOU TO BE WEAK, SO YOU WORSHIP AN EXTERNAL GOD OR CHURCH LEADER TO GET STRONGER, YOU GIVE YOURSELF AWAY NOW, FOR A BETTER FUTURE LATER, LIKE A SLAVE, WHICH IS WHAT YOU UNDERSTAND, HOW THEIR LEADERS SEE YOU.
SO THESE RELIGIONS ARE DESIGNED TO REPLACE YOUR ANIMAL HERD WITH THEIR HERD VALUES, THAT IS THE GENIUS OF THEM, AND IF YOU HAVE A STRONG BACKGROUND AS A JEW OR A MUSLIM THESE REPLACEMENT HERDS CAN BE VERY, VERY HARD TO SHAKE OFF – YOU ARE A ‘SACRIFICE’.
DON’T GET ME WRONG HOWEVER, I RECOGNIZE THE POWER OF THESE 2 OLD WAYS AS MAKING YOU FAR MORE RECEPTIVE TO THE LEFT HAND PATH IF ‘YOU ARE STRONG’ AS A PERSON, IT IS WESTERN PROTESTANT CHRISTIANITY THAT IS DEGENERATE, TO THE POINT THAT IT BARELY EXISTS NOW.
SO LETS BE SUPER CLEAR – TO FOLLOW THE PATH OF THE ARISTOS YOU MUST CHANGE YOUR HERD TO ‘THE CULT OF YOU’, YOUR ‘CLASS’, OTHERWISE YOU WILL REMAIN A SLAVE TO EITHER AN ANIMAL OR RELIGIOUS ‘HERD’ AND NEVER ESCAPE YOUR MOMENTS.
Did you FEEL THAT LAST BIT ‘STING A LITTLE’? Great, as that means there may be some HOPE FOR YOUR ‘RAPID DEVELOPMENT’ – IT APPEARS YOU HAVE ENOUGH SELF-AWARENESS TO CHANGE. See, I CAN TELL IF YOU HAVE SOME BOTTLE IN 1 MIN, I can tell if you are full of Self Pity, pointless blaming and the projection of your own stupidity onto others, LOST IN THE FAKE WORLD OF SOME GUTLESS DORKS. Or IF YOU HAVE THE BOTTLE TO COPE WITH SOME SHIT, BEFORE YOU GET AROUND TO CHANGING IT ON YOUR OWN TERMS, like an Aristocrat. But then you probably already know that IF YOU KNOW ME, as I make a point of testing you – EVERYTHING HAS HAPPENED BEFORE, YOU ARE A STEREOTYPE…
GET SMARTER TODAY – BE ‘NOBODY’ AND FEEL IT ‘HIT’!
RE-READ THIS PREFACE OVER AND OVER AGAIN UNTIL YOU HAVE GOT SMARTER!
I AM TRYING TO HELP YOU, BUT YOU MUST GET SMARTER FIRST BY UNDERSTANDING YOURSELF!
DO YOU GET IT? DO YOU UNDERSTAND YOU MUST ‘GET IT’, AND HOW YOU ‘GET IT’ SO IT ‘HITS’?
Hope so, otherwise all of this today will be more Fake You, BECAUSE YOU CAN NOT YET ‘DISREGARD FAKE YOU’ AND FEEL WHAT ‘REAL YOU IS TRYING TO TELL YOU’, so you will be stuck reading this as a HERD ANIMAL, FOREVER CIRCLING ROUND your petty fears, desires and boredoms AS JUST MORE OF YOUR MANY HERD PROJECTIONS, that stupid little YOU still thinks ‘YOUR THOUGHTS COME FROM YOU’, ARE YOUR VERY OWN OPINION, however ridiculously STEREOTYPICAL even you know they are – YOU ARE FAKE, WHAT YOU THINK WITH YOUR OLD FAKE HERD PATTERNS OF EGO SAFETY IS OF NO USE OR INTEREST TO ANYONE, YOU MUST START AGAIN WITH YOUR THOUGHTS ABOUT THIS, ABOUT ME, ABOUT YOURSELF, as that is the only way you can CHANGE!
No Left-Hand path type ever wants to use Religious Analogies, but it is NO harm in this case – YOU CAN NOT DEVELOP AS YOUR FAKE SELF, BECAUSE YOU ARE JUST TO SMALL TO UNDERSTAND. You must see that next to your REAL SELF you know nothing, you say nothing, you think nothing, you see nothing, you hear NOTHING, you do nothing, AS REAL YOU IS MASSIVE IN COMPARISON TO FAKE YOU, you the insect. We do not insult you for FUN, we insult you so you understand that right now all of this is beyond your comprehension AT YOUR LEVEL OF CONSCIOUSNESS, BUT ‘YOUR GOD’, YOUR SPIRIT DOES UNDERSTAND, because it knows the TRUTH, the REAL, so it will help you see that if you STOP USING YOUR EGO SAFETY, YOUR CONTINUAL NEED TO BE CLEVER to judge everything as good or bad. YOU ARE NOT YOU, you are much, MUCH BIGGER THAN THE TINY, FLAKEY MESS THAT YOU THINK YOU ARE but the only way you will ever know that is if you ALLOW YOURSELF TO CHANGE, TO RESET, TO DITCH YOUR OLD SENSE OF SELF…
One more time – FORGET YOURSELF, BE THE NOBODY I TAUGHT YOU TO BE, AND THEN READ THIS WITH AN OPEN MIND AGAIN, OTHERWISE YOU WILL STAY stuck forever in the petty comforts of BEING THE MOST SELF-IMPORTANT BUG ON YOUR OWN PERSONAL PUDDLE OF PISS, as you slowly shrink and disappear, and that is just too bloody sad for words, don’t you think – DON’T LET YOUR FAKE YOU BE ‘THE GATEKEEPER’ OF REAL YOU AND THE REAL WORLD, IT IS SUPPOSED TO BE THE OTHER WAY ROUND. Accept this now, in that private time you use to DEVELOP YOUR SELF, AND BE NOBODY, so all of this can get a shitload quicker as trust me, ONCE YOU SEE JUST HOW BIG A VACOUS TWAT YOU ARE, you will want nothing else than to BE DIFFERENT, BE ARISTOS, particularly if you are BRAVE ENOUGH TO LET YOUR CONSCIENCE TEAR FAKE YOU TO SHREDS, and ‘give in to’ your REAL self, BUT THAT TAKES SOME SERIOUS BOTTLE…
Please understand the reason for this level of EMPHASIS, understand that we are not some RELIGIOUS FANATICS, expecting you to take all of this on FAITH – YOU MUST GET THIS RATIONALLY. We don’t treat you like children, we don’t get you to repeat some pre-worded prayer as a petition to a higher power to HELP YOU, THAT EVERYTHING IS THE WILL OF ALLAH, that you can do NOTHING FOR YOURSELF. This is the 4th way, YOU MUST SEE THAT IF YOU CONTINUE TO DEFEND YOUR EGO AS RIGHT, AS GOOD, AS TRUE you will continue to make the same bloody mistakes you have always made, INSTEAD OF REALIZING YOUR EGO IS THE REASON YOU ARE IN SUCH A FUCKING MESS. Your FAKE EGO is the Gatekeeper to CHANGE, TO BETTER THAN, and right now you are stuck on the WRONG SIDE OF THAT GATE AS IT DOES NOT WANT YOU TO CHANGE, it wants to DEFEND ITSELF, AS THAT IS THE REASON YOU HAVE AN EGO, TO DEFEND YOU FROM THE UNEXPLAINED, UNWANTED AND UNWARRANTED EMOTIONAL PAIN OF AN ANIMAL.
See, I know from bitter experience just how much the NEED TO GO ON DOING IT ‘YOUR’ WAY is the path to TOTAL SELF DESTRUCTION, so I HAVE TO FIND A FORM OF WORDS TO GET THIS TO HIT YOU – you are simply doing the best you can with the little you know, NO ONE COULD OF EXPECTED YOU TO DO ANY BETTER, but now you know better BECAUSE I HAVE TAUGHT you HOW TO KNOW BETTER, so you must be prepared to throw away everything that is KEEPING YOU STUCK AT AN ANIMAL LEVEL OF CONSCIOUSNESS. STOP DEFENDING YOURSELF AND SIMPLY ACCEPT THAT YOU WERE ‘WRONG’ OUT OF IGNORANCE – FIND THE KEY FEATURE OF YOUR FAKE SELF, YOUR CHILDHOOD TRAUMA AND GIVE IT UP, THEN MOVE ON – WHAT’S TO LOSE NOW, EH?
GET THIS, see it THEORETICALLY, then read this preface again and do your best TO GROW UP BY GETTING SMARTER. Honestly, once you get the hang of this TRUTH STUFF, it gets very easy and much faster, but you can thank me later. Just try and keep in mind that your EGO is a childish transition you are supposed to grow out of via some rights of passage, when you develop some bottle. To live in your EGO as an adult is akin to being pushed around in a pram that no longer fits you and is slowly wearing out, before it breaks under your weight and miss use, and you go slightly mad. But you can have these rights of passage anytime you like, indeed many Gifted Hedonists have by accident, but they only associate them with their basic, much as some you may of been lucky and had some Aristos training from your family, particularly if you are high caste Asian/Indian, even one of the those High Persian Pakistani Prince or Princess, where this stuff was taught at the dinner table. So know wherever you are starting from, YOU MUST FIND YOUR ‘BOTTLE’ TODAY, and get used to BRACING YOURSELF VIA YOUR SUPERIORITY not fear…
Ahhh, but ‘what do I brace myself against, what do I react TO in the moment, at the start like’, I hear some of the smarter amongst you ask? So the trick TO GETTING STARTED, TO PRACTICE HAVING BOTTLE SO YOU CUT THE PATTERN IN YOUR SOUL is both simple and ancient – WHENEVER YOU FEEL THE PETTY THRILL OF SECRET CLEVERNESS, REMIND YOURSELF THAT YOU ARE ABOUT TO MAKE A TOTAL TWAT OF YOURSELF IN AN OBVIOUS, TOE CURLINGLY SAD WAY, and EVERYONE WILL SEE IT, AND DESPISE YOU FOR IT. Then BRACE AGAINST THAT SECRET LITTLE THRILL, AND STOP ACTING IT OUT, and be A POLITE ARISTOS INSTEAD BY FEELING YOUR ‘SUPERIORITY TO YOURSELF’. You may know this as the MEDIEVAL TRICK OF THE ‘FOOL’, but you can’t afford ‘retainers’, so you have to learn to do this TO yourself, TO STOP ‘THE FOOL OF FAKE YOU’ CONTINUING TO FUCK YOUR LIFE UP, because you have GOT SMARTER.
See it this way – YOU DON’T WANT US TO LOOK AT YOU AS ONE MORE GUTLESS, BLIND, STUPID, CRINGY LITTLE RETARD FOREVER, DO YOU..? So have a heart eh, watching you play the TWAT by acting out your programming is so utterly BORING, maybe try and do something unexpected, eh, before the blood starts to leak out of our ears. See, particularly for a few of you I USED TO KNOW, its kinda important to get that, whilst you still use these type of ANIMAL COMFORTS to get through the day, then you are still ‘THEM’, however much you delude your self you are ‘US’ – to be gifted you have to ‘Live Gifted’, otherwise in a very real way you are an even BIGGER FAKE TWAT THAN THEY ARE. So you must seek the comforts of the Aristos instead, BEFORE THAT TIREDNESS AROUND YOUR EYES starts to get a lot worse, and EVEN YOUR ‘ANIMAL ADVANTAGE’ fades to grey.
Yes, teach yourself to be ASHAMED of your LEVEL, OF YOUR TOTAL LACK OF CLASS THAT ‘WE’ CAN ALL SEE, and then you will become ‘US’ pretty damn quickly. But don’t get lost in the degenerate Western Religious morality of ‘doing it anyway’, then ‘making up for it’ later, in atoning for your ‘sins against yourself’. We FUCKING HATE THAT SHIT, as that is the route of all quid-pro-quo culture that has so infected the West with its current level of mediocrity, in its halfway house of accepting that you are shit because its ‘normal’, and therefore your ‘society’ makes it acceptable TO BE NOTHING, as long as you quietly regret it later, then that’s ‘ok’. See in ORDER TO EAT THE ENERGY OF FAKE YOU, TO TAKE IT BACK, YOU MUST ACTUALLY STOP BEING A TWAT IN THE MOMENT OF WANTING TO BE A TWAT, otherwise it is yet another of your many exercises in EGO SAFETY, and simply adds to your delusion – WE DON’T DO SLAVE RELIGION ON THE LEFT-HAND PATH, WE DO GIFTED KARMA INSTEAD BECAUSE ITS VERY REAL. However strange this sounds, it is possible to do a HUGE amount of development by simply stopping all you tiny, twaty little comforters IN THE MOMENT OF WANTING TO DO THEM over and over again, that most other folks don’t even notice, BUT YOU DO.
So the greatest Day-to-Day trick you will EVER LEARN ON THIS PATH of the ARISTOS IS SIMPLY THIS:
GET SMARTER SO YOU CAN STOP USING THE COMFORTERS OF A DOMESTICATED ANIMAL AND START USING ‘THE COMFORTS OF ELITISM’.
THEN YOU WILL FEEL SUPERIOR BECAUSE YOU ARE SUPERIOR TO THE THOUGHTS AND URGES OF YOUR ANIMAL COMFORTERS, THEN YOU WILL BE ARISTOS, YOU WILL BE ‘US’, BECAUSE YOU WILL KNOW YOU ARE NO LONGER ‘THEM’, YOU WILL BE ‘BETTER THAN’ THAT, YOU WILL BE ‘BRAVE’.
BUT MOST OF ALL, YOU WILL KNOW WHAT REAL ‘SIGNIFICANCE’ FEELS LIKE BECAUSE YOUR BODY WILL MAKE MUCH MORE OF THAT FEELING, SO YOU WILL ‘POSSESS YOURSELF’ ALL THE FUCKING TIME, AND ALL OF THIS THEORY WILL BECOME ‘YOUR TRUTH’, AS THAT IS THE POINT OF ‘SIGNIFICANCE’.
YES, YOUR BODY IS A CHEMICAL FACTORY, AND IN THE GIFTED THAT FACTORY IS CONTROLLED BY THE QUALITY OF YOUR SPIRIT, TO ‘BE PRESENT IN YOUR PRESENCE’, BUT YOU REPRESS IT VIA YOUR PATTERNS, SO YOU MUST LEARN TO DEAL WITH YOUR OWN EMOTIONAL REALITY, WITH OUT OTHER DRUGS.
CRUCIALLY, YOU CAN THEN GROW UP ENOUGH TO BE READY FOR THE REST OF THIS, READY TO BREAK YOUR ANIMAL ‘STATE OF ATTACHMENT’.
Yes, we are going to deal with one of the biggies today, what 4th Wayers call your constant state of ‘Identification’, the thing that most defines you as an ANIMAL because in this state you need to constantly OVERPOWER that Animal to develop, but without that state development is natural and easy for GIFTED. However much this is taught in our New Age world as the Buddhist version ‘Attachment’, we teach this the Ancient Greek way, the STOIC WAY, Way of the Aristos, we call it your constant STATE OF TAKING RESPONSIBILITY. See the only reason you feel aneixty for things is that you have lost your INTERNAL SENSE OF RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOURSELF, you have lost your SELF RESPECT and allowed Fake You to pervert this need by ONLY FEELING RESPONSIBLE FOR EXTERNAL THINGS, as this allows Fake You to control you via the immediate need to REACT TO EXTERNAL THINGS. And that has to go – YOU HAVE TO SWITCH THIS BACK TO DEVELOP, AS YOU NEED TO STOP BEING DOMINATED BY YOUR PATTERN TRIGGERS TO EXTERNAL STIMULOUS = FAKE YOU. Be clear, your REACTIONS ARE HOW FAKE YOU CONTINUES TO EXIST – ZENMEN ARE TAUGHT TO NOT REACT TO ANYTHING…
Now this is a very personal teaching of mine BECAUSE IT IS TAUGHT VERY BADLY BY MOST SYSTEMS, AS THEIR TEACHING RELIES ON PATTERN REPLACEMENT, RATHER THAN THE RATIONALISATION OF TRUTH so it HITS AS GNOSIS. See over the years I have found it much MORE EFFECTIVE THEORECTICALLY TO ‘EXPLAIN’ ATTACHMENT AS YOUR CONSTANT NEED TO ‘FEEL RESPONSIBLE’, even though it can be a struggle to see you need to be responsible for a tree you have just looked at, when you break that state IT IS MUCH MORE EFFECTIVE AS YOU WILL FEEL THE LOSS OF THAT RESPONSIBILITY CLEARER, TO THE POINT THAT IS THEN MUCH EASIER TO GET TO THAT LOSS OF RESPONSIBILITY AS A STATE, and then YOU CAN MIMIC IT AS A PRACTISE BEFORE ITS GONE. You simply tell yourself you are NOT RESPONSIBLE for any chosen example, SO ‘FUCK IT’ – YOU ARE ONLY RESPONSIBLE FOR WHAT YOU CAN DO OR CHOOSE NOT TO DO, like a good STOIC, as Stoicism in itself is actually built on top of Breaking this State of Mind, more correctly of BEING ALL THE TIME, and is the basis of all Marcus Aurelius’s best work.
You should use this idea TO TRY AND UNDERSTAND SELF RESPECT, OF RESPECT FOR SOMETHING ABOVE YOU THAT IS WAY BIGGER THAN YOUR CURRENT LEVEL OF CONSCIOUSNESS OF YOURSELF, which currently sees only a tiny part of the WHOLE YOU IN SOME MOMENTARY CONTEXT. Indeed you don’t even see ALL OF FAKE YOU – YOU DON’T SEE WHAT FAKE YOU IS ACTUALLY AIMING AT, ITS GOAL, YOU SEE THE STEPS FAKE YOU USES TO GET YOU TO ITS GOAL, AND YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND THOSE STEPS AS PART OF THAT GOAL, YOU SEE THEM IN ISOLATION AS PART OF YOUR CHARACTER, CAUSE YOU ARE STUPID.
However much this sounds to you like a nice to have, NEVER DOUBT HOW MUCH EVERYTHING IN YOUR LIFE GETS BETTER WHEN YOU BREAK YOUR STATE OF ATTACHMENT, BECAUSE IT IS YOUR PRISON GUARD, YOUR GATE KEEPER. When you lose that FEELING OF RESPONSIBILITY you will no longer be dominated by a set of childish, out-of-date patterns that have been perverted by Fake You, so continually fuck your life up. This issue is so BAD that it has been the front end of all religious systems of Esoteric development for thousands of years, but the most popular way of doing it is simply NOT FOR YOU – the VOW OF POVERTY, SO YOU LITERALLY HAVE NOTHING TO CARE ABOUT, and even that can take years to truly hit. Many of the other Aristos type systems tend to use temporary loss, the fabled RONIN phase of the samurai classes is the Zen approach, which I have personally done more than once, TO GIVE UP EVERYTHING FOR A TIME AND DISAPPEAR, and is EXTREMELY INSTRUCTIONAL, but none of that is necessary when you KNOW THE WAY OF THE ‘SLY MAN’, when you can directly access this state through the use of YOUR EYES, which in truth is the GREEK way, and as with all things Greek, also the GNOSTIC Christian way – IT IS WHAT THE IMAGE OF A CROSS IS REMINDING YOU TO ‘DO’. However, even with this colossal SPEED UP, it helps a lot to realize upfront the feeling you are trying to get rid of, and PRACISE QUIETLY NOT FEELING RESPONSIBLE, by realizing that you currently do feel responsible for external things ALL THE TIME, BUT HAVE REPRESSED IT AS ‘NORMAL’ – RESPONSIBILITY = THE NEED TO CARE ABOUT IT = TO HAVE AN OPINION ABOUT IT = TO THINK ABOUT SHIT SO FAKE YOU CAN EXIST BY CONTROLLING THOSE THOUGHTS AS REACTIONS.
Yes, the trick is to understand YOUR SENSE OF RESPONSIBILITY AS A FEELING, rather than a process, rather than as ownership, as then you will start to see how you FEEL THIS WAY about everything out of habit, for no OBVIOUS REASON TO CARE ABOUT ALL external things, but you don’t feel this way about yourself, WHICH IS ACTUALLY A FORM OF MADNESS… More about this later, but DO TRY AND GET COMFORTABLE WITH THIS SLIGHTLY DIFFERENT APPROACH OF MINE, it will help you to understand just how dominated by the need to react to things you are, to the point that if you are not reacting then FAKE YOU CEASES TO EXIST for a time, AND YOU CAN BE YOUR REAL SELF. So be very clear, you are not attached to this or that thing, IT IS A CONSTANT STATE, a State where everything you engage with outside of you causes some level of emotional reaction in you, either good, bad or indifferent, but however un noticeable it maybe for you, IT IS STILL A REACTION, because it comes from your mental patterns. So those patterns kick in and OWN YOU FOR THAT TIME, like a dog chasing a ball, until it finds food, or hears another dog, a never-ending cycle of nothing, WHILST YOU THINK YOU ARE THINKING THIS STUFF. Trust me, you are really just watching a bad movie of your childish pattern playout, WHILST FEELING RESPONSIBLE FOR ALL AT SUCH A NORMAL LEVEL THAT YOU ‘HAVE’ TO FOLLOW THOSE PATTERNS IN THE MOMENT, so CAN NOT CONTROL YOUR MOMENTS = THE BARS ON YOUR MENTAL CAGE, THE REASON YOU HAVE TO FOLLOW YOUR PATTERNS.
One thing worth mentioning before we leave this TOPIC is the DANGERS OF BREAKING YOUR STATE OF ATTACHMENT TO THINGS, LOSING YOUR FEELING OF RESPONSIBILITY, YOUR SLAVE MINDSET, without UNDERSTANDING IT. See, an an animal you WANT TO BE RESPONSIBLE FOR EVERYTHING AROUND YOU, BECAUSE IT MAKES YOU FEEL NORMAL. However shit that normal is, it can be difficult if you just lose it out of the blue via THEORY, which does happen, and OFTEN LEADS TO REGRESSION BACK TO AN EVEN MORE SLAVE STATE THAT YOU WERE BEFORE, as you try and prove to yourself that you are NORMAL. You must therefore get the benefit of this CHANGE VERY CLEARLY, you must see how you are played by YOUR NEED TO IDENTIFY WITH EVERYTHING AS YOU, HOW EVERYTHING IS WORSE IN THIS STATE – IT IS THE SOURCE OF ALL YOUR DAY-TO-DAY ANXIETY. Loosing this is LIFE CHANGING, as it also helps remove the animal parasites from your life who ALWAYS MAKE YOU FEEL RESPONSIBLE FOR THEM, that it is your fault, SO YOU MUST TAKE RESPONSIBILITY AND PAY THE PRICE, which is of course TOTAL BOLLOCKS. YOU ARE ONLY RESPONSIBLE FOR YOURSELF, you only want to be ATTACHED TO EXTERNAL THINGS BECAUSE YOU FEEL RESPONSIBLE, the MAD, destructive nature of THE DELUSION OF UNCONSCIOUS ATTACHMENT TO SHIT, INSTEAD OF CONSCIOUS ATTACHMENT TO YOUR REAL SELF.
This ATTACHMENT TO YOURSELF IS SELF-RESPECT, but not at the start, whilst you are still an animal, whilst you are still only self-conscious out of some sort of embarrassment – AT THE START YOU ARE NOT RESPONSIBLE ‘FOR’ YOURSELF (YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THAT IS), YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE ‘TO’ YOURSELF, TO THE BIGGER, BETTER PARTS OF UNCONSCIOUS YOU, that CONSCIOUS YOU DOES NOT YET KNOW EXIST. This is the reason that Religion is so big on ‘Creator Gods’ for animals, for folks who have NO Real You to help them understand that CREATOR GOD, but it is YOUR ACTUAL REAL YOU, your Spirit, should you have been given one at BIRTH, so you don’t need an external one. Yes, what you are doing now is ONLY A PART OF WHO YOU ARE, and a very small, lesser part, THAT BELONGS TO THE BIGGER PARTS YOU DON’T KNOW YET.
The best way to understand this is that REMOVING YOUR SENSE OF RESPONSIBILITY FOR THINGS STOPS YOU BECOMING ATTACHED TO THEM AND MAKES YOU MORE SELF AWARE IN THE MOMENT. Right now you will find it hard to be Self Aware even of your body for more than a few moments, whilst occasionally being aware of your reputation via how people treat you, look at you, which is normally a form of self-conscious embarrassment.
So be very clear – THE STATE OF ATTACHMENT IS VERY STICKY, SO EVEN AFTER YOU KNOW HOW TO BREAK YOUR ATTACHMENT TO THINGS AT WILL, YOUR STATE OF ATTACHMENT WILL CONTINUE, WITH NO OBJECT OF PROJECTION. If you were not previously aware of this state of low level tension it will start to feel like YOU ARE CONTINUALLY TENSE FOR NO REASON, which is how an animal lives, it is just that your delusion has started to drop away so you feel it now. Therefore you need to use ABSTRACT METHOD BASED ON YOUR EYES TO LESSEN THAT TENSION, including the NOBODY PROCESS I TAUGHT YOU IN PART 3, so you can learn to drop off your animal mind and BE Aristos instead, as a process whenever you feel this tension moment to moment – YOU WILL NEED TODAYS METHOD TO START TO REMOVE THAT STATE COMPLETELY. When that feeling of RESPONSIBILITY STARTS TO LEAVE YOU, THE FEELING OF ALL YOUR CARES, YOU WILL STOP WANTING TO IDENTIFY WITH THINGS, AND START WANTING TO LISTEN TO YOURSELF, so it is a very clear change, and impossible to miss. But to get the most out of it, FOR IT TO BECOME ATTRACTIVE OUT OF THE BOX YOU SHOULD COMBINE IT WITH MANAGING YOUR OWN CHEMICAL FACTORY BETTER, in order to FEEL BETTER THAN, instead of slightly lost…
SEE WHEN YOU CAN USE YOUR ATTACHMENT AT WILL, YOU WILL NO LONGER BE FORCED TO REACT TO YOUR MOMENTS, AS YOU WILL NO LONGER BE STUCK IN THEM, CHASING DOPAMINE, AND THEY WILL APPEAR AS THEY ARE, a TRIVIAL, MEANINGLESS ‘NOTHING’, LITTLE MORE THAN A SILLY LITTLE REFLECTION OF YOUR OWN, ATTENTION SEEKING DRAMA. But we have to get your CHEMICAL FACTORY working at the level of ELITISM FIRST BY FOCUSING ON THE REALITY OF YOUR SPIRIT, because then YOU will actually CHASE the process of development like you currently chase your drugs, as your spiritual comforts will make your animal comforts feel like the momentary sugar rush of the nasty little boiled sweeties they are – you will become addicted to SEROTONIN, before you combine it with Oxytocin, the greatest and most miss understood drugs your body can produce, BECAUSE THEY ARE SPIRITUAL IN NATURE.
Yes, there really is no need to mention the powerful hormones the GIFTED USE TO BE SUPERIOR for the rest of this post, BUT it is important to understand what under pins all of this today practically, because of one simple Life Lesson – YOUR ANIMAL STATE OF CONSCIOUSNESS IS DOMINATED BY DOPAMINE, which makes you FEEL INFERIOR. Society as it has evolved is a PUSHER OF DOPAMINE, the little rushes of reward that FAKE YOU uses to control you like sweeties, as your addiction to it DEFINES YOU AS A CHILD – IT CREATES THE NEVER ENDING CYCLE OF FEAR/DESIRE/BOREDOM. Your FAKE YOU CONTROLS THIS HIT IN YOU VIA WHAT YOU CALL ‘ANTICIPATION’, even when that state is TOTALLY FAKE, you still get the hit of that Hormone, however trivial and meaningless. So today know that switching to ELITISM changes YOUR DRUG OF CHOICE and allows you to PRODUCE MUCH, MUCH MORE OF THE GIFTED HORMONES THAT ARE YOUR BIRTHRIGHT. Ahhh… but you always knew this, or so you think…
YES, many Highly Gifted KNOW THIS INTUITIVELY but choose to chase their Spirituality via RECREATIONAL DRUGS, which are actually A COMPENSATION for animals, AND END UP DESTROYING THEIR BODIES’ ABILITY TO PRODUCE THE CORRECT HORMONES. Yes, Caffeine and Nicotine have distinctly SPIRITUAL USES THAT UNDERPIN THEIR EMOTIONAL EFFECT AS THAT IS THE REASON WE HAVE THEM IN THE FORM THEY EXIST TODAY, why many 4th wayers continue to use them in fact, BUT MOST NATURALLY OCCURRING ONES are simple animal comforters. If this is you please try and remember what you are actually trying to do here today AS A REPLACEMENT FOR THE PERVERSION OF YOUR NATURAL GIFTED DESIRE TO FEEL ‘BETTER THAN’, then you will understand it much quicker, and it will be far easier to DO. See YOU will get that Serotonin and Oxytocin are actually gateways to your Conscience level emotions, they are the enablers of them, THE CARRIERS OF THEM, so at the start you need to make this stuff in larger quantities if you want Spirituality to really HIT YOU, then you will start to become WAY MORE SENSITIVE TO YOUR HIGHER SELF, AND ALL THE MASS OF OTHER EMOTIONS YOU ARE HAVING ALL THE TIME, ABOVE YOUR ANIMAL ONES, WHICH ARE BASED ON DOPAMINE.
Just for fun, but right now your only access to SEROTONIN at a meaningful level is a hot bath with MIN a couple of pounds of Epsom salts in it, as that will kick your Spirit in quickly and you will get to see how spiritually exhausted you are via all your animal crap. Many highly gifted hedonists fall a sleep within 2mins, as they had no idea how much they are running of empty, indulging in more and more extreme and desperate behaviors in ORDER KEEP THEIR ANIMAL GOING, whilst thinking its funny in that highly strung out Fake You ‘Fuck Up’ way. Should this hook you at all then know you should also combine it with a strong acidosis treatment, as you will also have major issues with lots of host critters, mainly Yeast, that are also using up your energy at a frightening rate, so get some Bicarb and drink a tablespoon in one glass every morning for a month, but be ready for the healing crisis if you have never done it before, as acid reflux out of long term tissue storage and large scale yeast die off is a bastard first time round. Just don’t be a pussy about it eh, what you are seeing is what is already wrong with you, so better to know, and MAKE SURE YOU HIT THE DRY SKIN BRUSHING BEFORE THE BATH, AS YOU TOTAL LACK OF EMOTIONAL AND PHYSICAL HYGIENE WILL MEAN YOU ARE COVERED IN DEAD SKIN, which makes you repulsive at a spiritual level, so maybe find yourself a pool, sauna, and steam room too…
Yes, much as no 4th way teacher really talks about Hormones, it is useful for you to understand why you are stuck at a childish animal level of consciousness WHY YOU HAVE REFUSED TO GROW UP, WHY YOU ARE DEGENERATE – DOPAMINE. See HORMONES ARE NOT DEVELOPMENT, BUT THEY ARE GATEWAYS INTO DEVELOPMENT FOR GIFTED, they allow you to FEEL YOUR DEVELOPMENT, as even that big black cat knows that if it lies in the sun long enough it will feel BETTER THAN, even its body can produce these hormones, WHICH IS WHY ALL THE CULTS OF THE ‘NOBILITY OF NATURE’, OF THE NOBLE SAVAGE exist, as that is what these chemicals do – THEY ‘MAKE YOU DIGNIFIED’, ‘HOLY’ EVEN. But that cat can’t develop itself, it is simply led around by that feeling, THERE IS NOTHING THERE TO DEVELOP, so HORMONES, LIKE ALL DRUGS, are not at end in themselves. Still they can control you very effectively, AS YOUR CHEAP THRILLS ARE MORE READILY AVAILABLE TO YOU THAN YOUR BETTER THAN, but only because you are STUPID. See, what you are doing everytime you engage in the DOPAMINE CYCLE is EATING A PIECE OF CAKE FOR A SUGAR RUSH, frankly it is not even really a ‘comforter’, you have made it seem like one via artificial levels of anticipation, and even then it DOES NOT REALLY WORK FOR MORE THAN A MOMENT OR 2, before you need more CAKE, WHICH YOU THEN REALIZE IS JUST MORE NOTHING – THE RESULT IS A DISAPPOINTMENT, YOU MAKE A FOOL OF YOURSELF, BUT YOU HAVE NOTHING ELSE AS A CHILD SO YOU KEEP DOING IT, AND YOUR EMBARRASMENT GROWS.
Yes, right now YOU exist at a chemical level BENEATH THAT CAT, as that cat is not addicted to DOPAMINE LIKE YOU ARE, that cat has GROWN UP, and only used DOPAMINE TO LEARN HOW TO BE A CAT, WHEN SHE PLAYED AS A CUB, THAT IS THE POINT OF IT – TO BE CONTROLLED BY THE NEED FOR ‘ACHIEVEMENT’, TO ‘ANTICIPATE’ AS A FORM OF MOTIVATION. Its silly really, but in this day and age it has NEVER BEEN TRUER, all because you have never faced a simple fact – CHASING DOPAMINE AS AN ADULT MAKES YOU A TWAT. Stopping THE NEVER ENDING chase for DOPAMINE IS REALLY WHAT ALL THIS ADVICE ABOUT SAVING YOUR ENERGY FOR YOURSELF IS ABOUT, and for some when that FACT HITS HARD ENOUGH, they are able to simply stop the ‘anticipation’ THAT CREATES THE DOPAMINE, and so break that addiction easily, much as many struggle to SEE THIS IN THE MOMENT, and therefore go on ‘longing’ for THEIR shit even when they actually try TO stop doing it, WHICH IS SO FUCKING CHILDISH – JUST ANTICIPATE SOMETHING ELSE ‘BETTER THAN’!
Finally, in terms of your Hormones, it is useful to understand what happens, what becomes of the Dopamine addict, because it is becoming dominant public use case in the Western world – ‘THE SHRINKING INTO EMPTINESS’, OF TOTAL CONTROL BY EXTERNAL STIMULUS THAT LEADS TO A TOTAL LACK OF SELF AWARENESS, THAT LEADS TO EXTREMES OF BEHAVIOUR, THAT ENDS IN SELF DESTRUCTION. This is a form of actual MADNESS, the loss of your sense of self, where you need continual stimuli to know who you are, what you think, so you continually react, REACT, AND THEN OVERREACT SOME MORE TO NOTHING, you have to listen to music or the radio to be able to think, everything is about your HERD OPINION, and you become more and more aware that you don’t have one. In time you will become listless, paralyzed, lazy, dull, always bored, always worrying, always THINKING ABOUT TOTAL SHIT, SO YOUR LOW MOOD BECOMES DEPRESSION, BECOMES EMBARRASSMENT, BECOMES DESPERATION, and you are done, SIMPLY BECAUSE YOU HAVE NEVER GROWN UP. See YOU HAVE ALLOWED FAKE YOU TO EAT YOU ALIVE, and when their is nothing left you won’t even remember what you have done, let alone your little fun, because you are the WALKING DEAD NOW…
None of this is normal, none of this is the WAY IT SHOULD BE – IT IS HAPPENING NOW SIMPLY BECAUSE FOLKS NEVER GROW UP. See people don’t KNOW GROWN UP EXISTS ANYMORE, THEY WANDER THROUGH LIFE WANTING TO BE A CHILD BECAUSE IT IS IN SOME COOL TO PLAY WITH ELECTRONIC DOLLIES AS AN ADULT, ITS COOL TO BE SCARED SHITLESS ALL THE TIME, ITS COOL TO HAVE YOUR NOT SO SECRET LITTLE LIFE TO COMFORT YOU, ITS COOL TO BE DEFINED BY YOUR CHAIN STORE CONSUMER CAPITALISM, BY YOUR BRANDS, BY ALL YOUR STUFF BEING BETTER THAN OTHER PEOPLES STUFF. They don’t understand that all they are NOW is CANNON FODDER, yet they feel so ‘individual’ when they post that totally ill-informed, self-serving little herd opinion about some religious war on their socials. They don’t feel even remotely pathetic as they check back 10 times an hour to see if anyone has LIKED IT, to see if anyone has noticed them at all today, AND ALL OF THIS SHITSHOW IS ‘NORMAL’, it’s what they actually tell you to do, THE BASTARDS. But this is actually how ‘YOU’ become DEGENERATE ANIMAL TRASH, this is what DOPAMINE ADDICTION DOES TO YOU, so best stick to the coffee and the smokes, eh, OTHERWISE YOU WILL SIMPLY BECOME YOUR CHEAP THRILLS, and everyone else will KNOW IT, AND TREAT YOU ACCORDINGLY…
Anyway, we must START this post now, so hopefully all this NEW INFORMATION HAS ALREADY MADE YOU SMARTER, and particularly made you OPEN YOUR MIND TO ELITISM. See so many Gifted struggle so much with the concept and feel the need to go on and on and on with the values of their herd, of tying to be GOOD PUBLICALLY, however Fake they know, that everyone knows, it is. But don’t worry too much if you don’t just yet, see there is a time coming when you will REALIZE THE NEED FOR US AND THEM so clearly it will change your life, BECAUSE LEARNING TO BE PRESENT IN YOUR PRESENCE WILL MAKE THIS DIFFERENCE much clearer, and in some ways much worse. See you will be forced to recognize that all your relationships with FOLKS AT AN ANIMAL LEVEL OF CONSCIOUSNESS ARE BASED ON MANAGING THEIR COMPENSATORY BEHAVIOURS FOR THE INFERIORITY YOU MAKE THEM FEEL. The only escape from this is to DEVELOP YOURSELF, LEARN THE ARISTOS CONCEPT OF ‘DISTANCE’, BE RUTHLESS AND FIND YOUR OWN KIND, so you can start to live, rather than just exist. Trust me, when these compensations get BAD, when harmless little twats become obsessed with you, IT WILL TEST EVERY NERVE YOU HAVE NOT TO START THROWING THEM UNDER THE BUS WHENEVER THE MOOD TAKES YOU, however MUCH you understand it is not their fault as animals, you USUALLY END UP MAKING AN EXAMPLE, OR 2 – IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT EITHER, AND SOONER OR LATER IT USUALLY COMES DOWN TO YOU OR THEM, so its them – try not to forget this, however ‘nice’ you want to be OUT of your CLASS…
Ahhh, you cry, WHY HAVE I NOT EXPLAINED ALL THIS TO YOU BEFORE? NOW YOU ARE ACTUALLY INTERESTED! Mmmm, I reply – I HAVE DONE, you are just TO FUCKING STUPID TO CONNECT IT ALL TOGETHER, so you remain lost in yet another, ever so tedious Dopamine Mood, like a little baby, screaming for your mummies tit, and its momentary emotional comfort… So do try and GET SMARTER, EH, before the mental ‘shoe box’ you live in gets even bloody smaller, your addiction to FEAR/DESIRE/BOREDOM GETS MUCH WORSE as age, acidosis takes your ability to make and feel your HORMONES, and all your little illusions of secrecy and emotional safety come crashing down, AS TRUST ME, BOTH OF THOSE ANIMAL COMFORTERS ARE LONG GONE NOW…
Ahhhhhhhh, you don’t believe that, you think everything is basically ok – YOU ARE KEEPING IT TOGETHER, YOU’RE SURVIVING, SO EVERYTHING IS ‘OK’..? So remind yourself now, YOUR OK IS ‘DOGSHIT’, IS NOTHING, IS SO FAR BENEATH WHAT YOU CAN DO IT IS AN EMBARRASSMENT TO WATCH… So for YOU, from all the ‘smarts’ in this preface, know the one you need to try the most is REPUTATION MANAGEMENT – MANY GIFTED WOMEN PARTICULARLY HAVE NO IDEA JUST HOW UTTERLY APPALLING THEIR REPUTATION IS, CAUSE THEY BLANK IT OUT OF CRUSHING EMBARRASSMENT. See, your whole life is dominated by the public knowledge of your SECRET BASIC, that your illusion of KEEPING UP APPEARANCES is utterly transparent – NO ONE WHO KNOWS YOU THINKS YOU ARE GOOD, NICE, HONEST, DECENT, KIND OR EVEN THE WORST OF ALL, THAT YOU AR